The Greater Potion of F**k
My party, which I DM, has pulled massive shenanigans to get a potion which can do literally anything, and it’s effects are determined through 2 dice rolls and many other circumstantial things which I won’t get in to. So far, this potion has:
1) Turned trees in to chocolate
2) Turned a hawk inside out
3) Incinerated an old lady
And 4) Painted a house rainbow
The Dwarf Fighter of the party, who has 8 Int, keeps the potion. Here is the most comical thing to happen:
Dwarf(OOC): I want to feed the potion to the Blue Slaad servant to demonstrate to [Wizard]’s aunt Jemima what it does
DM (me): alright… *rolls a few dice*… huh… okay, the Slaad’s legs detach, like a doll, no blood, just pop off. His body stays suspended in the air, as the legs float up, relocating and reattaching on the top of his head. He falls to the floor with a loud thud, and you hear him start to gurgle out the words “Kill me…” ever so quietly.
The entire table then erupts in to raucous laughter for about 5 minutes with this image now in our heads.
I eagerly await more usage of this potion