Three kinds of attraction and why it’s important to know the difference

Aesthetic attraction: “I want to look at you.” You think someone is beautiful, very pleasing to the eye, but you feel no desire to touch them.

Sensual attraction: “I want to cuddle you.” You feel a great deal of affection towards someone and you want to hug them, hold them, perhaps kiss them, but with your hands never straying below the belt.

Sexual attraction: “I want to fuck you.” You want to do things of an explicitly sexual nature with someone.

Why is this distinction important? Because I didn’t realize I was demisexual until the age of 27 because all my life I thought that aesthetic + sensual attraction was the same thing as sexual attraction. I always thought that finding someone beautiful and wanting to touch or kiss them was sexual attraction, but realizing that it’s not, that sexual attraction means actually desiring sexual acts with a person, has changed my life and explained so many things. When I was figuring this out, a number of other people commented that they felt the exact same as me, so I think this is some pretty important stuff to spread around.

Click here if you think might be asexual,  or here if you think you might be demisexual.

Meet the Purple-Red Scale of Attraction, an alternative to the Kinsey scale that not only measures degrees of who you’re attracted to, but the type of attraction you experience. 

It was created by Langdon Parks, a heterosexual asexual man who recently posted the new system on Reddit. So while the traditional Kinsey scale measures you on a 0-6 scale for complete heterosexuality to complete homosexuality, the Purple-Red scale also measures you on an A-F spectrum, for aromantic asexuality through hypersexuality.

It’s imperfect, too, not accounting for nuances like attraction to more than two genders or different kinds of attraction to different genders. But ace and demisexual inclusivity are good things. Well done. (via Mic)

Smell Dating is a service that matches you with people based on their B.O. to prevent prejudices from getting in the way of your ancient instincts of attraction. Participants wear the same shirt, without deodorant, for 3 days, mail it in, and then receive shirt samples from others. When 2 people jive with each other’s scent, they’re paired up as a match. Source

The universal Law of Attraction states that we draw to us those people, events, and circumstances that match our inner state of being. In other words, we attract experiences that are consistent with our beliefs. If we believe that there is plenty of love in the world and we are worthy of giving and receiving that love, we will attract a different quality of relationships than someone who believes in scarcity or feels unworthy of happiness.
—  Arielle Ford
what type of person the signs are attracted to

*use your sun and venus

ARIES: someone rebellious, who stands out from the crowd, independent, and who understands their argumentative nature.

TAURUS: someone stable, loving, and secure, who will be consistent in their relationship, and is open with their emotions.

GEMINI: someone fun, and humorous, independent, and someone who won’t cling to them. someone who likes to talk and be intellectual with them.

CANCER: someone who is loving and emotionally open and protective. they may look for someone to take care of them, and who will be ok w a little clinginess.

LEO: someone who will flatter them, and reassure them in case of insecurities, but will also treat them like an intelligent person, not the bimbo that they are sometimes stereotyped as.

VIRGO: someone who will stay by their side and create a comfortable connection with them. they are probably also looking for an intellectual.

LIBRA: someone to bring out the side they don’t always show, who they can share private things w and talk all night.

SCORPIO: someone who can connect with them on a deep emotional level, and trust w their most hidden secrets. they may also look for someone to take care of, and protect.

SAGITTARIUS: someone who is adventurous and curious, who they can laugh w about the stupidest things, and share their ideas w.

CAPRICORN: someone who will think about the future with them, and bring out their secretly emotional side, and connect w them on that.

AQUARIUS: someone who is independent, intelligent, and different, who will give them the space they need. they will look for someone to be a friend primarily.

PISCES: someone who is both emotional and smart. who they can share their personal things w, and for the action to be reciprocated.