atl:e

concept: i smell like tea tree oil and mint, there is an entire forest lodged delicately in my gentle, curved palms. i am dreaming of you curled into me, i am dreaming of quiet meadows and warm sunshine. these dreams slip out from under my eyelids, glittering on my lashes, edges away from reality. we are one thousand, three hundred and seventy-four miles away. i can feel your warmth anyway.

Dear Max,

I know you don’t really pay attention to what I have to say. I have videos of you and you’re always on your phone. Social media is your life line. And yet you probably won’t find this letter. I sort of hope maybe you will.

God tells me to forgive those who have hurt me. I can’t forgive him. Cause I get him out of my head. I tried taking showers. I tried escaping the memories from my sleep. He hurt me. I can’t wash him off.
Yet I can’t forgive you as well. I can’t. I tried to forgive you but I struggle cause I don’t even know how. And it’s killing me.
The fact that you run him in my face and let it slide. How can you be so cowardly and apathetic?

Letting you back in my life would mean I value myself little.

And I cry because I really thought you were my friend and there’s no going back.

I hope one day I can forgive you. I know we will meet again because we work together. I know I’ll be okay then.
Until then?

Goodbye.


-E