astoria posts

Slytherin Girls’ Headcanons

  • Slytherin girls demanding equality from their male counterparts
  • Slytherin girls are really supportive of one another and encourage each other to do the best and follow their dream cause they know it’s a harsh world out there
  • Slytherin girls fighting slut shaming and defending other girls’ sexual lives and sexuality 
  • Slytherin pureblood girls fighting pureblood traditions and the patriarchal system within the pureblood community and making a stand for their rights and independence 
  • Slytherin pureblood girls defending halfblood girls and muggleborn girls
  • Slytherin girls fighting boys who belittle and threaten other girls
  • Slytherin girls protecting the younger Slytherin girls from older boys who aren't nice 
  • Slytherin girls teaching younger Slytherin girls independence and how to stand up for themselves 
  • Slytherin girls refusing to compete with other girls for a man’s attention and instead banding together to take him down
  • Slytherin girls plotting on how to avenge another girl who was hurt by a guy
  • Slytherin girls not taking any shit from any guy
  • Slytherin girls speaking out on inequality and injustices and using their cunning minds on how to fight it
  • Slytherin girls banding together with other girls from other houses to fight and stand up to guys’ bullshit
  • Slytherin girls recognising sexual orientation and gender orientation movements and joining in to support it
  • Slytherin girls encouraging girl friendships and discouraging animosity, catiness and competitiveness  between girls
  • Slytherin girls supporting and helping people with mental illness and taking down all those who make fun and bully people who suffer with such
  • Slytherin girls forming groups to take down those who bully girls for any reason, no matter what house they’re from
  • Slytherin girls using their cunningness, ambition and determination to help those who can’t help themselves due to systems implemented that are their to keep them down
  • Slytherin girls are strong, independent girls who will cut anyone down who threatens them and those they care for
  • Slytherin girls sneaking out at night to get chocolate from the kitchens for their friends and other girls who are on their periods and have cravings
  • Slytherin girls making potions that help with period cramps and pms symptoms 
  • Slytherin girls talking to and helping the younger girls to learn abut their bodily functions
  • Slytherin girls encouraging body positivity and to love themselves and literally attacking anyone who shit talks other girls based on their appearance
  • Slytherin girls against racism and encouraging cultural appreciation   
  • Slytherin girls being Slytherin girls
MC's Answer "Why are you on the floor?"
  • AFK MC: [face-up, looking concerned] I've done nothing but work the past three days and I think my body just... Gave up?
  • GIL MC: [face-down, ankles crossed, head resting on arms] I've discovered that this is the best position so that the world can KISS MY ASS.
  • L&L MC: [face-down, limbs sprawled] Because life is just HARD okay.
  • HILF MC: [face-up, squinting] I lost my glasses and refuse to try and walk anywhere until they are back on my face. I hardly trust this town when I CAN see and now that everything's blurry? Not. A. Chance.
  • SP MC: [curled up on side] I just sort of fell and I don't feel like getting up. I am one with the floor and the floor is with me.
  • ST MC: [face-up, arms behind head, smirking] It's easier trying to scheme when you're closer to hell.
  • C!LA MC: [face-up, staring up] Oh, just questioning every thing I've ever done. Lol wanna join?
  • VN MC: [face-down, cradling head in arms] I go to work, I get attacked by Optimus. I go to my place, they attack me again. I come to the Syndicate to nap AND I GET ATTACKED WITH YOUR QUESTIONS.
2

Woe is me

Draco: Astoria was that really necessary?

Astoria: What? That swoon was not faked at all…I am overheated, maybe we should head back to our room

Draco: and these women in the lift have nothing to do with it?

Astoria: women? What women, Are you implying that I’m jealous?

Draco: You used that same swoon to get out of dinner with my parents last week.

Astoria: oh pooh I’m a walking catalyst for allergies, forgive me if I use it in my benefit

Draco: but not today my love

Astoria: fine! But the next time you want to get out of an engagement, it’s your turn to find a convincing excuse

Draco: I’ll just remind people that Hermione Granger still wants to punch me, that’s usually all it takes to make a quick exit

Contouring 101 (feat. Lovestruck’s MC’s)

Quotes come directly from the masterpiece that is Contouring 101 by the amazing Sailor J.


GIL MC: “Makeup is for women who want husbands. Contouring is for women who want to leech the souls of their dead lovers and collect the inheritance of ex-boyfriends who disappeared under mysterious circumstances.”

Castaway! MC: “Perhaps in a better world women wouldn’t feel like they had to contour. Seeing as it has nothing to do with experimentation or artistry. SINCE IT’S SIMPLY FOR THE DICK, we have to do it.”

HILF MC: “I don’t know if you’re supposed to put your contour on before the rest of your makeup or after the rest of your makeup, but it doesn’t matter, because men are stupid. As long as you look like a newborn baby, they are willing to mate with you.”

SP MC: “Men don’t like nostrils. You want to look like a pterodactyl. Men love pterodactyls.”
SP MC: [screeches]

AFK MC: “If you have too big of a brain it means you have ugly things like opinions and thoughts of your own.”

ST MC: “Schaming these poor, fragile men. Next thing you know we’ll be doing things like wearing deodorants and bras.”

VN MC: “CALL ME RIHANNA!”

L&L MC: [holding up a beauty blender] “It is a sponge drenched with the power of Satan. Ready to take some fucking souls and ruin SOME GODDAMN LIVES.”

Inktober 2018, Day 5 and Day 6 sketches of Alex Cyprin (Astoria Fate’s Kiss/Lost Kisses) and JD (Havenfall is for Lovers). I haven’t read JD’s route, but my Tumblr dash was filled with posts/screenshots of their route a while back. I can tell they are a fun-loving character with a big heart.

“Just don’t pay attention to them and they’ll probably-!” (Alex dialogue)

“Cyprin! Long time no-!” (JD dialogue)

It seems JD also knows Alex from a long time ago? I really, really wonder if Alex and JD ever rode motorcycles together. Thus, I sketched them both holding helmets…perhaps about to go out for a ride together? (For those who forgot or have never read Alex Cyprin’s Fate’s Kiss route, they rode a motorcycle with Dionysus down the pacific coast highway in the past.)

Alex Cyprin
Aphrodite’s Grief

“When your mother passed away…it was the first time I realized death could touch Olympus. What I saw extinguished the light in Aphrodite’s eyes. She wept for days on end and nothing I did could console her. I was helpless. All the power at my fingertips didn’t mean a thing in the wake of her grief. And suddenly I knew it could happen to you, one day.”

9

[Lack of Lamb Sauce] Hogwarts Potions Professor Gordon Ramsay Moodboard

“Easy now. Don’t give into that silly old Gryffindor notion that all Slytherins are rotten. Every Slytherin, like every other student, is like a fresh tomato…full of potential, but also ripe for spoilage and bruising. That’s why we must treat them gently – keep them well-washed, partner them with others, and transform them into something amazing.”

~Gordon Ramsay, Harry Potter and the Lack of Lamb Sauce Chapter 1: Hell’s Kitchen

anonymous asked:

Homoromantic asexual Draco Malfoy. -H

TW: Acephobia, homophobia/lesbophobia, transphobia, compulsive heterosexuality

After thirteen years of marriage, twelve of which had merely been because of poor Scorp, Draco finally had to admit this wasn’t working. 

When he came out as ace to his father, he’d been given The Look and a matching lecture. “You are a pureblood. I and my fathers before me have worked hard on our image. I don’t particularly care if you want sex, Draco. I don’t care if you want to dress in a frilly apron and call yourself Daphne. You will resist all inappropriate urges that would smear our family name. And after you marry, you and your wife will have a child, and you will have this same talk with your child one day. Carrying on the Malfoy name isn’t about what you want, son, and it’s about time you learned that. Who you project to the world is what really matters. Besides, you do not have to want sex in order to have a child.” 

Draco had immediately dropped all thoughts of explaining what asexual actually meant and smartly told his father “yes, sir”. He spent the rest of his youth and young adulthood pretending he wasn’t asexual and outright denying he was gay.

Astoria was nice enough. She was pretty and kind, and she didn’t seem much more interested in the physical stuff than Draco was. So when their families set them up, Draco just went with it. And when he got down on one knee, presented her with a ring, and asked “will you marry me?” he pretended his father hadn’t told him that it was time already.

And when Astoria said “yes”, a wry, thin-lipped grin that didn’t belay any happiness on her face, Draco pretended she probably hadn’t had a very similar talk from her mother. They gave each other a perfunctory kiss, then invited their parents to dinner to give them the news.

They tried only as much as it took until Astoria got pregnant. And even though Draco hadn’t been otherwise excited, he did find himself genuinely looking forward to having a child. He’d been so wrapped up in trying to present an appropriate version of himself to the world (which didn’t seem worth it when nobody could see past Pureblood Slytherin Death Eater Villain but honestly, Draco didn’t know how else to cope), he’d never really thought about being a father.

The birth of little Scorpius was the best day of Draco’s life. Words couldn’t describe how it felt to realize the little being he’d helped create was actually living in this world, here, with him. And when Astoria, still exhausted and holding her newly cleaned off babe, whispered, “I’m not doing this again,” Draco half wondered if he’d imagined it.

He whispered back, “agreed,” just in case.

It was easier to pretend to be happily married when Scorpius was young and needed so much time from both his parents. Draco could say there were times when he was genuinely happy being around Scorpius. 

And then Scorpius turned 11, and he went off to Hogwarts. Astoria and Draco tried. They really did. But they’d forgotten how lonely it was without Scorpius. They’d forgotten about lives not just revolving around their son. Scorpius’ first year of Hogwarts left Draco and Astoria’s house quiet. Strained. Tense.

Scorpius came home for the summer, full of energy, wanting to be able visit friends - friends whose parents weren’t the biggest fans of Draco. But Draco and Astoria made it through the summer, more friendly around each other than they’d been in months.

All too soon, they were dropping Scorpius back off at King’s Cross Station and watching him board the train. As soon as they got back home, Draco broke. He couldn’t stand any more years of a tense household, quietly sitting in his study, not wanting to bother Astoria, equally quiet in her reading room. He couldn’t stand any more stiff dinners where neither of them pretended to make conversation anymore.

“Astoria?” he said, taking a moment to realize he could hear his voice echoing when Scorpius was gone.

“Hmm?” she looked over at him, surprised to hear him speak.

“Astoria… I’m. I’m gay. And, not that it really matters here, but I’m also asexual.”

It’s not what Draco intended to say, but there it was. Astoria looked at him, then slowly lowered her face into her hands. Her shoulders started shaking. It took Draco several moments to realize the sound coming from her was laughter. Normally, his first reaction would have been hurt and embarrassment, but when you live with somebody for more than a decade, you get to know them at least a little. Even in a loveless marriage. And Draco didn’t feel as if he should be insulted.

“Astoria?” he finally asked again, after several minutes of letting her get it out.

She looked up, face tearstained but with a genuine smile on it. “Draco, I’m a lesbian,” she said. “I’m pretty sure it’s why our families fixed us up specifically.”

Draco sat down. All these years, he’d been so wrapped up in keeping on his own Malfoy Mask, he’d never really thought about why she was as disinterested in him as he in her. He’d only been relieved. Never questioned it past that.

“Merlin,” he said. He reached over to take her hand. “Would you do me the honor of divorcing me?” he asked.

Astoria grinned. “I’d love to.”

And together, they laughed. And laughed and laughed and laughed in relief and a new sense of self. For the first time since Scorpius’ birth, they were actually both happy in each other’s company.

Draco hadn’t really planned on actually asking for a divorce, but it just seemed like the right thing to do. Astoria and him both deserved an actual shot at love - if that’s what they wanted. At the very least, they deserved to live out their lives in a house where they felt comfortable making it their own house.

They laughed until Draco groaned and realized, “not only do we have to tell our parents, we also have to tell Scorpius.”

Astoria sighed. “Honestly, I’ve given enough of my life to my parents. I’m past seeking their approval. If they don’t support me, they don’t need to talk to me anymore. I know we’ve got a lot of details to work out regarding Scorp, but he’s been hinting at how sad we both seem ever since we let him go over to his friend Al’s house. I guess Harry and Ginny are a much friendlier and happier match than we were.”

“He… He was?” Draco felt bad for not noticing. For a moment, he felt like his own father, too wrapped up in his own business to actually pay attention to his son.

Astoria smiled at him, though. “He has, but don’t feel bad. He was actually quite subtle about it. I really only started to understand his comments when I accidentally opened one of Al’s replies to his letters.”

“Accidentally?” Draco raised an eyebrow.

Astoria gave him a light tap. “Yes, accidentally. Ginny sent me a letter about Scorp sleeping over and she had them both in the same envelope. Honestly, I can’t tell if she has atrocious handwriting or if Albus has gorgeous handwriting.

Draco laughed. He wasn’t looking forward to announcing his divorce to his parents (although father had drastically changed after Azkaban and his mum had become a much more dominating force, so who knows? Maybe it would go better than he was imagining) or Scorpius, but he couldn’t deny the relief he was feeling. And it seemed like, although this was the end of his marriage with Astoria, it was the beginning of a new friendship. Draco found himself looking forward to that as much as he was looking forward to the possibilities of his future.

~Hufflepuff Mod