You know. Sometimes there are things that make you go WTF like expanding earth theories and everything that a 3D printer can do. Then there are things like this woman who uses asparagus to read the future.
She calls herself the Asparamancer.
I found the article on Coast to Coast AM which is exactly the type of place the Asparamancer should live on the internet.
The Asparamancer lives a lonely life, for she is the only one of her kind and has no mentors or prodigies, nor established practices. But from the humble tips of asparagus, Jemima can see the future.