ask the strider lalondes

anonymous asked:

I love how it's just a universally accepted Fact that without a recooperacoon, trolls will gather any and all blankets, pillows and napkins within a mile radius and make a nest

this is basically my actual favorite thing like troll nesting bullshit is so fucking cute??? I hc that karkat (and kanaya) both switch over to sleeping in a regular old bed but they still wake up sometimes having gathered all the blankets and pillows and discarded clothing and stuffed animals within reach around them into a ridiculous troll pile right there on the bed. rose and dave gossip about this, each of them trying not to let on how adorable they think it is and failing miserably. karkat consciously makes one when they watch movies in bed and is like what don’t look at me like this it’s more comfortable this way leave me alone :((( (dave just climbs in, karkat snuggles in with him while simultaneously berating him about how he wasn’t explicitly invited, what a rude boyfriend he has)

2

i’ve been super stressed about art lately!! so i did this. these are all my headcanons for the characters as far as ethnicity goes, if you want specifics, you can absolutely ask. 

Homestuck Smash Bros Headcanons

•Karkat would play dark sonic every single time because he’s black, spiky, and looks cool. He has no other reason. Karkat is not even good at this game, he loses first nearly every single time and it is entirely because he goes into the speedy ball and rolls off the stage immediately. He complains loudly every time this happens but refuses to play any other character.
•Dave aggressively mains as Zero Suit Samus, at first to be ironic because haha it’s a chick that looks like a Barbie, but he very quickly realizes that she’s a badass character and her whip is sick as fuck. He also targets Karkat almost exclusively just to hear him complain, Dave would be pretty good if he actually took it seriously though.
•Rose and Kanaya both play as Zelda, but Rose only plays as her usual form and Kanaya only plays as Sheik. Rose likes Zelda for her magical abilities, whereas Kanaya admires her for her impeccable fashion sense. It goes without saying that Rose makes her purple and Kanaya switches her to green.
•Jade plays as Olimar for no other reason than “he’s so cute!! And look at his little radish friends!!” But she completely demolishes in like, every single round. Everyone is tired of it. Olimar has no attacks how is she winning.
•John plays as (blue) Kirby because he loves dropping down on ppl as a brick or smashing them with that big ass hammer, mostly he goofs around with Dave to make a bunch of wackass stages that make it impossible to win in any conclusive way, including The Box™, a stage completely boxed in making it impossible to fly off once you get enough damage. They play for hours in one round, their damage is 999%, every hit sends them ricocheting from wall to wall endlessly.
•Additionally, when Jane plays she will fight John for the right to play blue Kirby because 1) he’s blue fuck you john and 2) his smash ball power is literally throwing all the other characters into a cooking pot if you think Jane will not bring it hard as hell you can eat my ass.
•Roxy plays as jigglypuff and makes it to the end of battles because she sustains literally zero damage. She spends all the time avoiding the fight by floating around in the air and singing her enemies to sleep if they get too close. Once it gets down to her and one other person tho she starts hitting buttons randomly and yelling and sitting on them while they’re playing just to do anything to keep them from winning.
•Callie doesn’t play very much, but when she does it as Toon Link because he’s small and green just like her!! And he looks like one of her drawings how cute!! Mostly though she’s perfectly content to just watch Roxy play and egg her on once she starts screeching.
•Dirk switches between Marth, bc of the swordplay, and Lucario, bc he’s a huge fucking furry. Both characters are actually really good and any game that has him, Dave, and Jade in it lasts literally forever because they’re all so good. Dirk gets v quiet while playing because he’s in The Zone.
•Jake is OK, but he’s far from on par w/ the others just because he’s not used to video games that have controllers as opposed to VR and obviously he would prefer good ol’ fashioned fisticuffs!! But when he does play it’s with Pit because of the annoying ass “hyahh!!” the character makes every time he attacks, “it shows he’s got real gumption!”
•Terezi plays as bright red yoshi and just keeps eating ppl. Just, swallowing them and putting them in eggs. She doesn’t do any fighting she just eats ppl and turns them into eggs, cackling the entire time and high-fiving Dave every time she lays another egg.
•SOLLUX IS NOT ALLOWED TO PLAY. every time they’re talking about smash and sollux walks in it goes DEAD SILENT. “Hey whatcha guys talking about” and whatever the first excuse is everyone is forced to go with it, Dave of course takes full advantage of this, “oh actually-” and if he finished the sentence before Karkat fucking tackles him then everyone is gonna have a bad time. But it’s because they all know Sollux will completely grasp the game within five seconds of just watching one round, crush everyone immediately and people actually enjoy when the rounds actually last longer than half a minute.

3

literally just a 3-page continuation of the previous 3 pages, aka, how it should have ended

strilondes wearing my clothes because lmao i have the most ironically hilarious tshirts

anonymous asked:

Headcanon: Dirk has a lot of hickeys on his neck frequently

Roxy and Jane arrive together, bustling in from the chilly outdoors in a flurry of hot pink and cool cyan. Jane never seems too bothered by the cold, but Roxy is swimming in a coat so thick her head looks almost comical sprouting out the top of it. Not to mention the scarves, spilling out everywhere, trailing behind her. She catches his expression – he must have looked pretty fucking amused – and tosses her hair and lifts her chin like his opinion has only strengthened her dedication to the look. Jane follows after her, smiling and giving them a little wave as she bustles into the booth bench across from them. They both have snowflakes melting in their hair. 

“Good afternoon, ladies,” Jake greets them, flashing them an unfairly charming grin. He toys with the straw in his drink. “Glad to see you made it, weather and all.” 

“Us?” Jane laughs, folding her hands over themselves on the table. “Nonsense. This is nothing, barely a flurry. Frankly, I was afraid it would be the two of you who called off, this week!” Her eyes flicker to Dirk, and she opens her mouth like she wants to keep going, but whatever she’s about to stay gets caught in her throat, and Dirk feels his eyebrows pull down as Jane’s eyes widen and her mouth just kind of hangs there, open. 

“What?” He asks, looking over his shoulder and back again, suddenly nervous. Jane blinks. Her lips fold shut and she sits a little straighter in her seat. She adjusts her sharp cut cyan blazer, and clears her throat. Next to her, Roxy hoists her elbows on the table, rests her chin in one gloved hand, and lets out an extremely undignified little snort. Dirk glares from one to the other. “Jesus, what the fuck? Is there something wrong with my face?” His heart is actually kicking up, his palms going a little damp with nerves. What’s their problem? 

“No, Dirk, your face is as sharply inscrutable as ever,” Jane says, but she’s looking out the window as she says in, and her voice is strained. 

Dirk pins Roxy with a glare he can feel deepening by the second. She meets his eyes and waggles her eyebrows at him, smirking. “What the fuck is her problem,” Dirk demands. 

“Wait, is there a problem?” Jake interjects beside him, and now he sounds nervous, too. Great. “I didn’t think there was a problem. We were just saying hello!” 

“Hello, Jakey,” Roxy agrees, and her scarves are piled so high around her neck and chin her voice is almost muffled into them. “And a great big hello there to you too, Mr. Strider,” she drawls this out like some kind of classical southern belle – her passion for imitating (and exaggerating!) Dave’s goddamn accent has got to stop. Dirk frowns, leaning back in his seat, tapping his fingers on the table. 

“See?” Jake says, sounding relieved. 

“How long have the two of you been here waiting for us?” Roxy goes on, fluttering her eyelashes. Dirk narrows his eyes at her, but she isn’t look at him anymore. 

“Oh, you know. Not long enough to make your entrance unfashionable, I’m sure you’ll be thrilled to know,” Jake says, and Roxy nods along. 

“Long enough to have gotten ‘round to some extracurriculars though, I see!” 

“Erm, what?” 

Jake blinks, tilting his head, and Jane whips her head around and hisses, “Roxy!” 

“Shit, you’re right, that’s silly. They’d never, would they, not in a place like this. This morning, then? Last night…?” She draws this last one out, and Dirk is just gaping at her, because he knows what she’s implying but he has no idea fucking – why?

Jane buries her face in her hands and makes a defeated sound, and in utter and bewildering contrast, Jake snaps up ramrod straight and gasps, “Oh!” 

“What the fuck?” Dirk asks again, this time directing it at him. 

“You’re talking about,” Jake makes a general gesture at Dirk, and he’s got these spots of color high and ruddy on his cheeks, but he’s not exactly wilting the way Jane is. 

“Great,” Jane says, muffled into her hands. “Now let’s all endeavor to do our best not to talk about it, please and thank you very much!” 

“Not to talk about what?” Dirk demands, and his expression has to be downright thunderous, by now, but Jake just gives him a nervous little laugh, Jane folds her arms on the table and collapses her face down into them, and Roxy waggles her eyebrows at him again.

“How about this,” Roxy says, and she straightens up and starts to unwind one of her scarves – black and purple and probably a gift from Rose. “You put this on and make yourself decent, so poor Jane here can enjoy her dinner without self immolating, how’s that?” She holds it out. 

“Make myself… decent,” Dirk says, eyeing it, and suddenly it clicks. “Oh my god,” he says, startling in his seat, reflexively pulling his collar up while the familiar heat of humiliation floods him. Roxy is laughing, again. Jane makes a defeated sound. He twists and glares daggers at Jake. “You said I looked fine!” He insists, and Jake shrinks back against the wall, but he’s biting his lip to keep from laughing, Dirk knows that god damn look. 

“Well, fuck me, Dirk, you did! You do. You always look damn fine, what am I supposed to say?” 

“God damn it,” Dirk says, and Roxy shakes the scarf at him. 

“Take it,” she says. He hesitates. “Do it for Jane, Dirk,” she insists, nudging her chin in her direction. Jane still has her head buried in her arms, and her shoulders are shaking with what Dirk thinks is laughter she’s desperately trying to keep quiet. “For Jane.” 

“God – fine, Jesus, give it here,” he snaps, and Jake makes a derisive little sound, and Dirk elbows him in the ribs, hard. Jake shoves him back. “Asshole,” Dirk mutters. 

“Y’all are so sweet,” Roxy says, fluttering her lashes, again, and Jane lifts her head. Her glasses are crooked on her face. She sits up and straightens them, calmly. 

“I’m going to flag down the waiter, now,” she informs them, in tones that aren’t to be argued with. “And we’re all going to forget that any of this ever happened.” 

“Amen,” Dirk says. 

“Roger that,” Jake agrees. 

“Fiiiine,” Roxy sighs, and Jane nods – but Crocker convinction and all, she still can’t quite meet his eyes for the rest of the night. 

anonymous asked:

John being happy and surrounded by love and friends bc I'm still on edge abt End Game Depression John hhh

Hey nonny? Me too.

This took way longer than I thought it would but I hope you enjoy these happy friends (full-sized version not messed up by tumblr here)

anonymous asked:

Before davekat became a thing, rose kept a journal of the fascinating courtship between the two. Sometimes she wrote directly in front of them wiggling her eyebrows and making a lot of hmmm sounds

He’s sitting at a table in the common room, doodling aimlessly, marinating in his own boredom and this weird nebulous feeling of discontent. He likes to complain loudly about there being nothing to do, but the truth is, this life is a whole hell of a lot better than the one he left behind. If only John and Jade were here, it’d be perfect. That’s probably all it is. Missing the friends that aren’t here. 

Rose is here, though, and thank God for that. She’s sitting on the couch, reclining slightly eyes glued to some book or another. And… maybe he’s not a friend, or maybe he is, who knows – but he can hear Karkat not far back behind his shoulder, his keyboard clacking away a mile a minute. He hits the keys way too hard because of course he does and Dave sneaks a glance over, already smirking before he speaks. 

“Dude,” he says, putting his pencil down, raising an eyebrow. Karkat ignores him. “You literally are incapable of doing anything quietly, aren’t you?”

“Fuck off,” Karkat says, his eyes never leaving his husktop screen, and Dave turns around with an exaggerated sigh. 

“I’m just saying, you’re ruining everyone else’s concentration. Isn’t he, Rose?” Rose will back him up, he’s sure of it. 

“It doesn’t bother me at all,” Rose says. 

“Traitor,” Dave mutters. 

Karkat’s keyboard strokes become, somehow, even more furious. But he doesn’t say anything. 

“Let me guess,” Dave says, since the alternative is turning meekly around and admitting defeat, and fuck that, “You’re arguing with Terezi, again.” 

“No.” 

“Vriska, then.” 

“Fuck no.” 

“…Kanaya?” 

Karkat growls, shoves his seat back, and slams his weird alien bug laptop shut loud enough that Dave has to fight the urge to wince. “No! Why the fuck would I be arguing with Kanaya! Why do you constantly have to flap your incessant gums at me, bludgeoning me constantly with so many pointless and insultingly idiotic flaps of your unnaturally pink human tongue?! What I’m doing is, as ever, none of your fucking business!” 

This tirade grows in volume until Dave is fairly sure everyone on the meteor can hear it, and when it’s done, Karkat shoves his laptop under his arm and ducks down like he’s about to scuttle off to who knows where. 

“Man,” Dave says, keeping it real casual, “That’ll show me, taking an interest in Karkat’s life. Really learned my lesson, there.” 

Karkat stops, halfway between the table and the transportalizer. Over on the couch, Rose has set her book down and is instead writing something in a new one with a solid purple cover. 

“There’s nothing interesting about my life, right now,” Karkat informs him. His eyebrows are pulled down and his forehead is creased and he’s got his teeth bared at him, and it’s funny that there’s literally an alien glaring daggers at him and all he can think is shit, I need to come up with some way to make sure he doesn’t go. Fucking – why? He shifts in his seat, pushing the thought away. Karkat is still talking. “So let me spare you the agony of pretending to give a shit, because we both know you’re just looking for a quick and dirty chuckle at my expense. Well, I’m not giving you any new material today!” 

“Too late,” Dave says. “You should see your face right now, bro. That shit is chuckle-worthy as fuck, right now.” 

Karkat sighs, his shoulders sagging. He opens his mouth like he’s going to say something else, then shakes his head and just kind of about-faces and goes, muttering something Dave can’t hear under his breath. Wait, Dave thinks, but he doesn’t say it out loud. I don’t know why I said that at all. Well, he kind of does. He was hoping Karkat would shoot back, like usual, but … 

The transportalizer flashes, and he’s gone. Rose makes a thoughtful hmm-ing sound, and Dave pushes down the disappointment pooling in his guts and turns on her, instead. 

“Don’t you hmm at me, Lalonde, that’s never a sign of anything good.” 

“Oh, don’t mind me, Dave,” she says, and she’s smirking, he can see, still scribbling away in her stupid suspicious purple book. 

“What the fuck is that thing, anyway, some kind of journal?” 

“It’s none of your concern,” she says. She finishes her writing and closes it with a snap, and her smirk only deepens when she meets his eyes. “Just chronicling a few things for scientific purposes.” 

His suspicions deepen. “You’d better not be writing anything about me in there.” 

“Dave, really. Don’t be selfish. What if, in the future, I want to write a novel about idiots who have no idea how to flirt?”

“Uh, okay,” Dave says, heat creeping up to his ears, “Firstly, I’m pretty sure you’re a prime source of material for that bullshit yourself –” 

“Oh, so you admit it was–”

“–Miss oh, Kanaya, you’re looking so perfunctorily adequate, today–” 

“–I didn’t want to lay it on too thick, and frankly, Dave, restraint is something you could–” 

“And secondly–” 

“–Your technique, if you can even call it that, is more akin to what one would expect to find in a fourth grade classroom–” 

“There’s no technique, because I wasn’t flirting!”

If Karkat had pigtails, you’d be tugging them every time he put them in grabbing distance!” 

They stare at each other. Dave is gripping the edge of the table so tight his hands vaguely hurt, and Rose her lips pursed and her arms crossed over her chest. 

“I wasn’t flirting,” Dave says again, quieter. “I’m not gay.” 

Well,” Rose says, “Good for you. I wasn’t aware it was such an awful thing to be.” 

He flinches back. “That’s not what I meant,” he says, but Rose is already standing up. She waves the purple book at him. 

“I know,” she says. “One day, we’ll both look back on all this and laugh.” She pauses, shakes her head. “I hope.” 

And then she’s gone, too, the transportalizer leaving a vaguely medicinal scent behind. Dave crosses his arms the way she always does at him, and glares down at nothing. The nebulous discontent has grown into a full on chasm of empty, in his guts, and it feels – fucking awful, actually. It feels fucking awful. Five minutes ago he was giving thanks that at least he had a few friends with him here, and now he’s all alone in this big empty room, and … 

And he hadn’t been fucking flirting. 

He picks up the paper he’d been doodling on – a shitty stick figure Karkat, shouting like always at an even shittier stick figure in shades – and crumples it up tight into a ball. What a bunch of goddamn garbage, really. Absolute fucking trash, like him.