ask the salad

Mac Demarco asks
  • Ode to Viceroy: Are you a smoker?
  • My Kind of Woman: Whats your 'type'?
  • Still Together: How long is/was your longest relationship?
  • Salad Days: Would you describe yourself as an easy going person?
  • Blue Boy: Are you more of an internally anxious person or externally anxious person?
  • Goodbye Weekend: Do you feel you struggle to live up to your own expectations?
  • Chamber of Reflection: Do you like being alone?
  • A Heart like Hers: Do you think love changes a person?
  • Let my Baby Stay: Do you think long distance relationships work?
  • Passing out Pieces: Do you think you spread yourself too thin?
  • Without Me: Are you friendly with your exes?

It was good to see you again, dearheart.  Take up Caladbolg, and protect this world.

Ive has been waiting for canonical closure for a very long time now.  Did he want to stay in that memory forever? Yes.  But it’s something, and one last time is better than never at all.

anonymous asked:

I uh really like your stories you write, can I request this prompt? A prophecy says that everything you love will die. Zarc could only laugh at his self loathing. He would live forever...

Okay first off I am absolutely genuinely sorry I couldn’t get to this sooner (in truth the day you sent this I actually finished about half of it lmao but I hit 2 obstacles: 1) work stole all of my free time and 2) after that first day writer’s block hit me up hard) so again sorry so much this took forever!! I hope it’s at least worth it if not welp at least I tried and I finished another fic either way so woo!

And secondly, you don’t know how much your ask really made my entire past 2 weeks and also motivated me! Even tho I hit writer’s block swear I tried working on it every night after work but none of the right words ever came to me after that first day augh. But again thanks for motivating me to write something!!

Anyways, here ya go!

Nothing’s Reprise

Words: ~1700

“Indeed, mortal. I can grant you the power you seek. However, this comes with a cost.”

Keep reading


Originally posted by effy-west

you’re Kirk’s wife and is close to all the crew, especially Spock, Bones and Scotty. Jim is worried about your safety on the Enterprise so he gets an officer to teach you self-defence. However the officer has a grudge on Kirk and takes it out on the reader who has too much pride to admit what’s going on. So when the boys find out, they go into overprotective mode.

“Are you sure you’re going to be alright?” Jim asked, holding your elbow as you stood outside the door to the gym. Jim had been worrying over you since you had first stepped foot onto the Enterprise.

“I’ll be fine. Now will you please get back to the bridge before this ship falls into disrepair” you teased, kissing his cheek and pushing him away. 

“Alright! Alright! I’m going! Comm me when you’ve finished” Jim chuckled, watching you go through into the gym before heading to the bridge. He did have work to do, no matter how much he’d be distracted until you came back. 

“Officer LaRue? I’m Ensign Kirk, the Captain said you would be able to teach me some self-defence classes” you introduced, walking up to the rather large officer. You couldn’t help but feel a little bit apprehensive about the class. He was so much bigger than you. 

“You’re the Captain’s wife?” he asked, running his eyes up and down you, sizing you up. It did nothing to help soothe the butterflies in your stomach. 

“Technically yes but I think you’re meant to call me Ensign” you corrected, bouncing on the balls of your feet. You always felt embarrassed when people found out your connection to Jim. No embarrassed was the wrong word, nervous. Yes that was it, nervous in case they thought you had gotten into the Enterprise because of your husband. When instead it was because of all your hard work. 

LaRue shrugged, beginning to get out some equipment. “I don’t care. We should get started. I expect you to work hard and keep up with me. I’m not going to go easy on you because you’re a girl” LaRue grumbled, as you bristled at that. It was fair though, you wanted to prove that you could handle being on the Enterprise. So if LaRue was your best chance, you would take it.

“So why aren’t you teaching her Captain?” Scotty asked, poking at his salad. Bones had put him on a diet, much to the irritation of the engineer. 

“Because the Captain would hate to see Ensign Kirk hurt” Spock replied, going through his data pad. 

“More like he’d get distracted too much” Bones scoffed, eating his sandwich with relish as he stared at a gaping Scotty. 

Jim rolled his eyes, glancing at his comm link in hope he had a message. “Shut up Bones! I just want to make sure Y/N is going to be okay on the ship. Especially as everyone knows that she’s my wife” Jim shrugged, putting him comm down a little bit too forcefully. 

“No one would harm Y/N Captain” Spock assured, typing away. 

“Hey!” You greeted, sitting beside Jim in the canteen. Honestly you were exhausted and you felt so sore. LaRue did not go easy on you at all, even considering that this was your first time. 

“Hey how was it?” Jim grinned, kissing your cheek as he wrapped an arm round you to bring you closer to him. 

You groaned, resting your head on his shoulder. “Good but I’m aching all over. Like in places I didn’t know should ever hurt” you grumbled, shaking your head. Honestly your arms ached, your legs were killing and you didn’t even want to know what was going on with your back. 

“Maybe you should have a medical” Bones suggested, reaching for his drink. 

“No thanks, Bones! I’m pretty sure I’m fine” you quickly cried, making Jim scoff into his lunch. It always amused him of your aversion for Bones when he was in doctor mode. It was probably due to how many times you had seen the doctor sticking a hypospray in Jim’s neck. 

“Perhaps it would be better for you to keep practicing Ensign. To become more used to the demands of the lessons” Spock advised, raising an eyebrow at your dramatics.

“I know that Spock, it doesn’t make my muscles hurt any less” you groaned, rolling your eyes at him. “Anyway, I should probably be getting back to work. I’ll see you tonight. See you later guys” you murmured, pecking Jim’s lips before waving at the others. 

As the weeks went on, you were becoming more and more covered in bruises. You hid yourself from everybody, especially Jim. All your skin was covered to make sure that no one could see the bruises. 

You had worked out a while ago that something wasn’t right. That no matter how much self-defence LaRue was teaching you, it didn’t make sense as to the level of force he used on you. So that was why you had stopped becoming intimate with Jim, scared in case he would find the bruises on your body and think you couldn’t handle yourself. Well you could. You just needed to find out a way to knock LaRue the fuck out.

“Ensign Kirk” a voice called from behind you, making you grimace. At the moment all you wanted to do was get on with your work so you could go to your quarters and have a nice warm bath. 

“Hey Spock, what are you doing down here?” you greeted, waiting for him to fall instep with you. 

“I was wondering if you and the Captain are alright. The Captain seems very tense lately and I wished to know if there was anything I could do to help” Spock told me, following me down the corridor to my work station. 

“We’re fine Spock, don’t worry. Jim’s just feeling stressed. Maybe you and Bones should take him for a drink next time we’re on a planet. It might cheer him up” you suggested, feeling guilt whirl in your stomach. You knew the reason Jim was so tense lately was because of you. So to offer a suggestion that you knew would not help, it made you feel 10 times worse about the situation.

“Of course. Maybe you could join us Y/N” Spock offered, handing you your datapad for you to use.

“Thanks Spock, but I don’t think that would help. Besides, it’s a boy’s night out. The clue is kind of in the name” you smiled, pulling up your work before looking up at Spock. It was so good to be surrounded by friends, even if you couldn’t tell them everything. 

“Is that seriously all you got? I’ve seen more fight in a Klingon, you’re pathetic!” LaRue sneered, kicking you in the ribs as you tried to pull yourself up for what felt like the 100th time. In fact you were pretty sure it was.

“Well maybe I should have a better teacher” you hissed between gritted teeth as you clutched onto your ribs. Before you had time to say or do anything else, LaRue was gripping onto your elbow and pulling you up onto your feet again.

“You’re the one who wanted this, Princess! Why don’t you stop acting like a pathetic wimp and actually give me a fight” he growled, before punching you in your stomach. The pain almost had you throwing up as you tried to remember how to breathe again. Your mind became fuzzy as you concentrated on standing on your own two feet rather than collapsing at LaRue’s.

Turning to face him, you swung a punch at him but he ducked, landing a blow to your side. You grunted out in pain, landing on your knees. Already your bruised ribs were going to turn into a darker colour, you just knew it.

Dragging yourself up, you faced him, slightly unsteady on your feet. He smirked at you, enjoying seeing you so weak and in pain. Waiting for him to come at you, you timed it just right so you could punch him clear in the jaw. LaRue went down like a tonne of bricks and you felt a sigh of relief escape you. You had managed to knock that frustrating little smirk off his face.

However your victory was short lived as LaRue grabbed you around the waist and tackled you onto the mat. All your breath left you as you were winded, groaning out slightly at how much pain you was in. It felt like you had been hit with a starship.

“That’s enough for today! I’d say learn some better moves but it’s obviously a waste of my time and oxygen” he grunted, holding his bloodied lip. It still made you feel a tiny bit proud of yourself though.

Making your way down to your quarter for a shower, you couldn’t help but notice yourself struggling to breathe. Even though your ribs ached like they normally did, this time it felt like you were getting stabbed with every inhale and exhale. This time you couldn’t ignore it, especially when an ensign accidentally bumped into you and nearly sent your vision white with a burst of pain.

Grunting in both annoyance and pain, you realised that you’d have to go down to Medbay. 

Poking your head around the door, you could sigh in relief if it didn’t feel so bad when you didn’t see Bones in the vicinity. That meant he was either in his office doing work or that he was with Jim. Stepping properly into the room, you went to grab the attention of a nurse when you saw your luck go up in smoke. Bones had walked in from his office directly in front of you and had spotted you. Cursing your luck and Bones’s untimely appearance, you turned on your heel before he could call you.

“Y/N? What are you doing in here? That idiot hasn’t got himself hurt again has he?” Bones greeted, reaching out for your shoulder to spin you around. You flinched away, instantly regretting it as you had to breathe out through gritted teeth. “Y/N?” he frowned in concern, eyes raking over you.

“I’m fine, sore shoulder. I was just looking for Jim. Thought he’d be here. I’d better go though” you muttered, keeping your sentences short so you didn’t have to take in as much breath. 

Bones took in your hunched posture, clenched fists and slightly sweaty forehead, realising that something was wrong. “Yeah that’s not a sore shoulder. Come on” Bones stated, leading me to a bed. 

“Honestly Bones, it’s fine! You don’t need to worry, it’ll be fine once I have a shower and a good night’s rest” you protested, trying to think of some excuse to get you out of this. If they found out about this you knew they would become overprotective of you, not let it rest until they found out who was doing this to you. And Jim would feel so guilty about getting LaRue to teach you self defence.

“You can’t even stand up straight. Now shut up and get on the bed!” Bones ordered, preparing the tricorder he would need to scan you. 

“Your bedside manner is atrocious doctor” you complained as you did what you was told. Maybe you could just get away with it being a bruised rib. Yeah… that was the best you could hope for. 

“Well I don’t do this job to get friends, darlin’. Now sit still while I actually do my job” Bones muttered, beginning to scan you. He frowned, noticing the incredible amount of white blood cells in your blood stream but no actual cause of illness. He lowered the tricorder over your chest cavity before he stopped, staring at the result. What the hell?

“May I?” he asked gently, hands reaching for your regulation shirt. 

You gulped, jaw tightening before nodding. He lifted up your shirt, staring at the expanse of bruises that littered all over your body. There was various colours, indicating the age of the bruises: blues, blacks, greens and browns. The worst was over your ribs and even from here he could see the slight misshape of your lower ribs. 

“Who did this?” Bones growled, eyes shooting up to yours. 

“Bones, it’s nothing. I can handle-” you started, knowing exactly how this was going to work. 

“Like hell you can! You’ve broken a rib Y/N! It’s why you can’t breathe without it hurting. Now who’s done this to ya or do I have to call Jim?” he demanded, getting a hypospray ready to give you some painkillers. Sighing heavily, you told him to call Jim. It would be better if they were all here so you could tell them. You didn’t really want to have to repeat it to everybody.

“Y/N! Hey, what’s wrong? Bones said to come down to medbay at once” Jim frowned, hurrying to your side as Spock followed in after him. Bones quickly shut the divider firmly behind them. You sighed, resting yourself against Jim, grimacing as you did so.

“I uh… I need to tell you something. I didn’t mean to keep it from you but… uh… I mean” you stuttered, nerves eating at your stomach. What if they were mad at you? What if they blamed you in some way? All these questions ran through your head as you tried to find the right words.

“She’s got a broken rib, extensive bruising and she’s lucky to have missed out on internal bleeding” Bones reported, interrupting your stuttering to tell everybody his diagnosis.

“What? How? Are you okay?” Jim questioned, hands coming to skim over your sides and pull up your shirt. He stopped at seeing your bruised body, unable to take in the sight. This is why you had been so distant. Why you didn’t want him to touch you or even see you undress. “Who did this?” Jim whispered, voice deceptively calm.

“Jim, just listen for a minute okay. Don’t get mad” you sighed, holding onto your ribs. 

“Don’t get mad?! It looks like you’ve been beaten to within an inch of your life! Who did this to you? Y/N, you have to tell me” Jim shouted, gripping onto your shoulders. 


“I’ll kill him. I’ll kill him” Jim growled, jumping up from the bed and storming towards the exit. You knew without doubt that Jim would, the conviction in his voice and the anger which strum through his body would make sure of it. But you didn’t want Jim to do that. It would destroy him if it did. He would lose his Captaincy, get thrown out of Starfleet and lose all that he had worked so hard for. You knew it would kill him to go through that.

“Jim! Stop!” you cried, trying to follow him but you couldn’t. The movement had caused your whole chest and back muscles to spasm, making you crumple to the floor. You would have hit your head on the bed if it wasn’t for Bones catching you and trying to hold you back.

Jim stopped, looking torn between helping you and making sure you were alright. Or paying a visit to LaRue and throwing him out of an airlock. 

“Captain, maybe it is best to listen to Y/N. If you try and go after LaRue, I fear that Y/N may injure herself further by running after you” Spock objected, glancing at Jim as Bones helped me back onto the bed.

“Definitely agreeing with you there Spock…Jim, will you please just leave it. If you kill him, he’ll make sure you’ll lose everything you love. Including this ship” you told him, grimacing as you lay back down on the bed. 

“He already hurt the thing I love the most” Jim sighed, coming to sit on the side of your bed and take your hand.

“I’m going to give you a painkiller and then I’ll give you something for your ribs. It might knock you out for a few hours but you’ll be as good as new when you wake up” Bones informed, getting everything prepared.

“Does this mean he’s going to stab me with a hypospray again?” you whinged, pouting up at your husband who smiled reassuringly. However, before he could reply back, you felt a flare of pain in your arm as Bones pressed a hypospray into you. “OUCH!” you cried, pulling away as he reached for the spray that would mend your ribs. 

“Don’t be such an infant!” Bones scoffed, stabbing you again.

“Jim… you need to fire him!” you breathed, already feeling the medication work. You tried your best to fight it as you could blearily see Jim lean over and kiss your head. The last thing you saw before you fell asleep was Jim smiling at you softly as he cupped your cheek.

Kirk found LaRue just finishing up his shift when he cornered him in a practice room. “So let me guess? You thought it would be a good idea to hurt Y/N, the woman I love, because of something I did” Jim announced, making LaRue jump and spin around in fear. Jim felt a streak of pleasure at seeing the man who had hurt his wife now terrified of him.

“Captain… uh… what are you talking about?” LaRue murmured, glancing behind Jim at Spock and Bones who was blocking the door. They were furious, faces cold and hard with no hint of kindness at all. They loved Y/N like their own sister and they would not tolerate anyone hurting her.

“Of course not! Spock, why don’t you shut the door, this might take a while” Jim suggested, lips quirking up at LaRue. 

“Captain! Please! It’s a misunderstanding! I was teaching her self-defence!” LaRue protested, stepping back against the wall.

“Ensign Kirk had a broken rib and multiple bruises over her body. I fail to see how that is efficiently teaching her self-defence” Spock rebuked, raising an eyebrow at the officer in front of him.

“She was bound to get hurt while I was teaching her!” LaRue objected, trying anything to get himself out of this. Surely they wouldn’t hurt him right? I mean after all, there was protocol. 

“Good god man! You were meant to be teaching her, not beating her until she could barely breath! What kind of man are you to take advantage of her like that?” Bones snarled, stepping forward, fist clenched. 

“Let me see, it was because I passed the promotion to someone else wasn’t it?” Jim smirked, punching LaRue with a right hook on his jaw. LaRue went down like a tonne of bricks, clutching his jaw tightly as he groaned. “Or was it when I refused to pick you for a expedition when you had been drinking? Oh, is it because I had you court-martial because you were drunk on duty?” Jim growled, hitting him again and breaking LaRue’s nose. It sent blood spurting out over the floor. 

Jim grabbed him by the lapels of his shirt and slammed him into the wall, hearing the dull metal clunk at the impact. “Or was it because I embarrassed you back at the Academy because I beat you in all our classes? Huh? Is that it?” Jim snarled, kneeing LaRue in the side. LaRue groaned, doubling over onto the floor, clutching his side.

“So when you had the chance to hurt my wife, I bet you jumped at it. I bet there was a place deep inside your sick mind that couldn’t wait to make her feel the pain, the embarrassment that you felt” Jim hissed, crouching down to LaRue’s side. Jim gripped LaRue’s hair, making sure he was looking at him. “Well, just so you know. You’re going to be responsible for getting kicked off this ship, a court-martial back on Earth and knowing you’ll never be working on a starship ever again. Not if I can help it anyway” Jim growled, shoving him away.

“Jim, that’s enough. Come on!” Bones interfered, pulling Jim away from the gasping man. “I’ll get someone to bring him to medbay before he’s transported back to Starfleet” Bones told him, leading Jim away.

“Oh, if you ever touch Y/N again, I swear I will find you and I will kill you” Jim promised, holding onto his bloodied fist. 

“Captain, come. Y/N will be awake soon” Spock instructed, ushering Jim out the room while Bones called for some help to take LaRue down to the medbay for a check over.

When you woke up, you felt groggy and confused for a few moments, the medication still in your bloodstream. But at least you could breathe better now, the pain in your body gone. Looking to the side of you, you spotted Jim sitting in a chair next to yours. He had fallen asleep with his head on the bed, snoring slightly. Running your fingers through his soft blonde hair, you looked back at the bright ceiling before looking to your other side.

You gaped, shocked at what you saw. There in the bed next to you was LaRue. He was surrounded by security but he looked like he had been knocked out. Shaking your head, you realised what had happened.

Tugging on Jim’s hair to wake him up, you heard his cries of pain as you spun your head to scowl at him. “Ow what was that for?!” he complained, rubbing his head as he gaped at you.

“You have a lot of explaining to do, idiot!” you glowered, pointing to the bed next to you.

“Oh that… don’t pretend you don’t like my protectiveness Y/N” he smirked, leaning back in his chair.

“Jim Kirk, you are nothing but trouble” you sighed, shaking your head as you couldn’t help but smile at him. Because it was true. You did love how protective he was of you. Even if he didn’t listen to you.

Switch It Up

Pairing: Sam x reader

Prompt: Body Swap

Words: 2400ish

Warnings: a little bit of smut in the beginning, like within the second paragraph, just jacking off. The rest of the fic is neutral.

A/N: This is written for @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog Mimi’s Trope Challenge. Eventhough it’s a bit late, I hope you still enjoy it, sweetie! It’s been a while since I’ve written anything so don’t be to hard on me, please.

Originally posted by devoiddean

Sunlight hit your features, soft snores sounding in your ears, a warm hand splayed across your bare back. You loved waking up like this, all tangled up with Sam, warm under the covers. Slowly you opened your eyes and glanced at your boyfriend through your lashes. Taking in his relaxed features you smiled, your heart swelling with love at the sight before you. His hair was a mess, all ruffled up, his neck and chest covered in little bruises you had left the night before, his lips parted slightly.

When you tried to slip from underneath his arms, Sam pulled you back against his chest, holding you there firmly. You chuckled to yourself at his gesture, but those sounds quickly subsided when you felt something hard poking against your thigh. Biting your lip you slowly let your hand glide from his chest down towards his v-line. Your fingers slipped around his cock and you gave his member a few gentle strokes. A sigh left his lips at your touch, prompting you to continue. You tightened your grip and pumped your hand up and down, your thumb grazing over his swollen tip.

“Hmm, sweetheart,” he moaned, probably thinking he was having a really good dream. You frowned at the nickname. Sam never called you sweetheart. With a shrug you continued your movements and smirked when his eyes fluttered open.

“Good morning,” you grinned before you scooted down the bed, placing yourself between his legs, your lips merely inches from his cock. Suddenly your boyfriend’s features changed from pure bliss to utter shock.

“Y/N, what are you doing?” Sam shouted, pushing your hand away from his member, scooting up the bed and covering himself up from your view with a pillow.

“Sam, what the fuck? You love it when I wake you up like that!” you retorted in disbelief as you crossed your arms over your chest.

“Sam?” he frowned. “Gosh, I can’t believe you’re cheating on my brother with me,” the shaggy haired man in front of you mumbled.

“Sam, stop being so weird! It’s freaking me out and when did I cheat on Dean with you?”

“Stop calling me Sam! That’s not making what you’re doing okay! Djesus, Y/N, this is fucked up.”

“What do you mean stop calling me Sam? It’s your goddamn name!” you shrieked, anger radiating off of your form. Your fingernails dug into the palms of your hands as you tried to hold back from punching him.

“I’m Dean!”

Keep reading

I’m not good at this...

Originally posted by lets-sell-0ur-shit-and-runaway

You had been Chibs old lady for a year now.  It’s 3 months until most of the Sons are out of County when Tara runs into the club house where you and Chibs are hanging out, her hair is in a mess and she holds Thomas in her arms and Abel trailing behind.
“Oh, thank god.  Look I need, I just need a break please, please watch them for a night.”  Tara looks near tears as Chibs stands up immediately and takes Thomas, you and Abel staring at each other.
“What’s wrong?”  You look up to Tara as she runs her fingers through her hair.
“Gemma is driving me crazy and I just.  Shit, I miss Jax.  Just, can you watch them for a night?  Please?”  Tara wipes away a tear and smiles shakily at the two of you.
“No problem Tara.”  Chibs answers and you try to hide the grimace.
“Thank you.  Mommy will get you tomorrow morning ok?  You’re going to have a sleep over with Chibs and (Y/N), ok?  I love you.”  Tara kisses the top of both boys’ heads and thanks you again for taking them.
“You keeping Mom up, little one?”  Chibs rubs Thomas’ back while you and Abel continue the stare off.  “Love?”
“I’m not good with kids.”  You whisper, keeping your voice down while not taking your eyes off of Abel.
“He not going to pounce.”  You can hear the smile in Chibs voice and look up quickly to glare at him.  Tara runs back in to drop off their bags and Thomas’ baby carrier, waving as she runs back out.  Thomas curls his head under Chibs chin and you can’t help but smile at the sight.  You pull up your sleeves and hear a gasp from Abel which causes you to jump.
“I like your arm.”  He whispers and hides behind Chibs leg.  You notice a giant giraffe being dragged behind him.
“Thanks, Abel.”  You look down at your black and white flower sleeve and nod towards the giraffe, “I like your stuffed animal.”  He quickly hides it behind Chibs.
“Alright, let’s go home, yeah?”  Chibs snickers as your face becomes red.  Chibs sets up the boys’ car seats while you put their stuff in the back of your car.  “What’s for dinner tonight, Love?”  
“Shit.  I mean shoot.”  You quickly correct yourself when you see Abel staring at you, “well your dad is Jax so I highly doubt you’ve never heard shit before.”
“My dad says Jesus Christ a lot.”  Abel says.
“That he does.”  You smirk down at the kid.  “I was just going to make salad and potatoes.  Are they going to eat that?”
“You and your vegan shit.”  Chibs snickers.  “Also, Thomas is still on milk.”
“Hey, you eat the vegan shit so you don’t have to cook for yourself.”  You push him as he comes closer, smiling down at you.
“If he doesn’t like it, we’ll order pizza, ok?”
“Mommy says pizza is bad for you.”  Abel says, getting into his car seat while Chibs buckles him and Thomas in.
“Well, let’s hope you like salad, huh?”
“SpongeBob doesn’t like salad.”  Abel mumbles.
“You’re right, but you are also not a sponge under the sea, are you?”  You raise your eyebrow at him and he giggles.  You turn in your seat and scrunch your eyebrows at Chibs.  “Was that funny?”
“Aye, love.  You’re doing just fine.  Can you handle them for the 10-minute ride home or do I need to save you from the scary youngins?”
“And let me drive your bike home?”  Your face blew up into a smile that quickly turned into a glare at his laugh.
“See you at home.”
“Asshole.”  You whisper.
“Mommy says that word a lot too.”
You bite your lip to keep from smiling, “I bet she does, Abel.”

You catch Abel looking at your arm again as he colors in his coloring book.  Thomas is playing in his floor jungle thing that Chibs had brought from the club house.  The fries are in the oven for another half hour while the three of you watch Toy Story.  You pull off your sweatshirt, leaving you in a tank top and sit down next to Abel, your arm with your tattoos closest to him.
“You wanna color them in?”  You ask, preparing to sit back and let the kid play.
“Really?”  His eyes start shining as you nod.
“As long as you understand that you can’t do this on random people.  Only if you ask and they say yes, ok?”  Chibs interferes quickly.  Abel nods and gets to work, your back resting against Chibs’ leg.  Soon his fingers start playing with your hair and you begin to relax.  

You answer your phone as you go through the grocery, stocking up on food for the week.  “Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Tara.”  
“What’s up?”  You say.  You stop your cart to give full attention to the call.
“Abel keeps asking me for salad the way (Y/N) makes it.  I’m not entirely sure what that means.”  Tara laughs over the phone.
“Oh.”  You smile.  “I just mashed up an avocado, added garlic powder, salt, pepper, jalapenos, and lime juice for the dressing and mixed it around a bunch of chopped up romaine.  Um, make sure it’s fully coating all of the leaves or else he may not like it anymore.”
“That’s all you fed him for dinner?”  Tara asks.
“No, we had fries.  Um, homemade fries.  I’m actually vegan so I didn’t really have anything in the house that was like chicken tenders or something but he seemed to like it.”  You chew at your nail, waiting for her to respond.
“Chibs eats vegan?”  Tara snorts.
“Only cause he’s too lazy to make his own food when he gets home.”  You laugh with her.
“Yeah, that I can believe.”  Tara says.


I was a cashier at a fast-food place in the mall for one summer. One time, this lady came up and perused the menu for a little while before ordering a combo for herself and her elderly mother. The lady comes back to the counter a few minutes later and starts scolding me. “This is too much starch! Rice and potatoes in one dish! It’s too much! It’s not good for my mother!" I had no idea what to do, so I stammered out a quick apology and asked if she wanted more salad. The "salad” we served was basically lettuce with shredded carrot and dressing on top. She huffed and said no, but “I make much healthier food at home! You need to make healthier food here!”

Good for you, lady. Meanwhile, I am a) not the cook, b) not the manager, and c) very obviously a teenager. And anyway, the menu is one of those big backlit signboards with all the ingredients listed out, perfectly readably, under each combo number. You knew what you were ordering in advance.

give thanks

Title: Give Thanks
Pairing: Tyler Joseph/Reader
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Daddy kink (obviously because I’m a monster), public shenanigans, dirty talk, unprotected sex (I never tag this whoops), aaand maybe there’s a camera involved…
A/N: Here’s my Thanksgiving present to all of you, especially those of you who had to struggle through a particularly tough dinner today. I hope you enjoy, I can’t wait to hear what you guys think.

Originally posted by brains-r-sick

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anonymous asked:

I just love the idea of Mute!Dick because he's always so talkative and expressive and I love seeing how he can do that without words. Could I get another addition to this AU? Maybe them over at the manor hanging out with the family together and then going on patrol after. Seeing a mute!Dick in action ~

First of all, I want to say I’m sorry I’ve been so lazy with prompts, I’ve been working on a few other projects and trying to make sure I don’t overwhelm myself like I did a few times last semester. 

As usual, this AU is super fun, and very pleasantly challenging to write. 

Other works in this verse

Family Communication

A couple times a month, Dick dragged Jason to the manor for some family bonding. The first few times it happened, Jason said no, not leaving any room for negotiation on the idea and Dick had pouted in his direction and denied him sex for over a week. Jason had been impressed because Dick was always affectionate, but during that week, he had danced away from Jason until Jason caved and said yes. 

Now, Jason didn’t protest when Dick started doing the characteristic rock and shoulder shrug that told Jason they were going to the manor, but Dick would do his best to make it worthwhile for both of them. 

Jason didn’t understand why Dick insisted on it at first, Dick and Bruce still argued a decent amount and Jason wasn’t on the best terms with the man either. It had taken a few trips for Jason to figure it out, but when he had, it made him realize that it was less of a chance to bond with family and more of a practice in communicating with Dick.

 The mannerisms Dick used were a language that required practice, some of the terms shifting and changing as time wore on.

They were sitting at the dinner table one night when Dick signaled to Bruce and the bowl of potatoes were passed his way. Dick huffed and pushed the Dick back. Signing that he was asking Bruce to pass the salad. 

“When did your signal for potatoes change?” Bruce asked. 

Dick shrugged. 

When Jason had first met Dick, there had been a complicated language between Bruce and the first Robin that had left him feeling left out and totally lost. Bruce knew how to read the smallest signals from Dick, but now, after living with and being in a relationship with Dick, Jason was the one that understood his signals the best. 

Tim was talking about a project he was working on when he looked at Jason and Dick, clearing his throat. 

“That’s not appropriate conversation for the table,” he said. “You may not be using ASL but I’m not blind.”

Dick flushed. 

“Wait, I thought you two were talking about combat,” Bruce said as he looked at them, brows furrowed. “Dick you were using the signals you used to use for acrobatics in a fight.”

Dick shrugged again. They hadn’t necessarily changed, but the terms Jason and Dick used in bed had their own unique meaning.

“Anyways,” Tim said, sensing the tension between them. “Tonight, I’m hoping we can use the new video monitoring software while we’re on patrol so we can understand what’s going on better.”

The body language that Dick used to communicate in combat hadn’t changed a lot since Jason had died and come back. It was a form of communication that soldiers were trained to use when they were supposed to be silent in combat with a few modifications that Dick and Bruce had come up with. 

They were all perched up on a rooftop looking over a warehouse that they were infiltrating when Dick signaled for them all to look at a door. 

“Good call,” Bruce said. He made a series of hand gestures at the building. Go inside, take down the guards one at a time, how many guns?

Dick signaled back. 10 men, all are probably armed. Better to ambush.

The two of them went back and forth for a few moments, Dick insisting on an ambush and Bruce insisting on a quieter approach when they heard gunfire from the building. Dick smiled and flipped off the roof they were perched on, firing off his grapple. 

“Ambush it is then,” Tim said as he and Jason followed behind Dick. 

The hardest part about being on patrol with Dick was that it was ten times harder to communicate with him when he was out of sight. They had to rely on the sighs, grunts, and gentle taps from Dick in their earpieces, but only Bruce and Jason could really tell what the signals meant. 

There was a series of taps from Dick and Jason nodded. 

“More men then we expected. Great. Armed or not?”

Another series of taps. 

“Big guns, got it,” Bruce replied. 

“No,” Jason said. “That wasn’t the tap for big guns.”

Dick tapped a few more times but Bruce and Jason were too busy arguing to pay attention to the way Dick was trying to correct them. Things were getting heated when there was a squeal and three of the four vigilantes in the building grunted in pain. 

“What the hell Dick?”

A scoff and a choked noise of pain from one of the goons in the building indicated that Dick had taken care of everything himself. 

“Not big guns then,” Jason said. “So I was right.” There was another squeal in his earpiece and Jason groaned. “Fine. Fine. I get it, we’ll stop arguing.”

They left the warehouse, everything taken care of, and they stopped back at the manor. They were all tired from fighting off armed goons and tracking down leads on who the supplies in the warehouse had been bought from. 

Dick was at the computer with Bruce, helping to provide information, stealing the keyboard and providing details where Bruce missed them. 

“Bruce is just a little jealous,” Tim told him. “He used to be the one that knew all of Dick’s signals, everything he was trying to say, and now he doesn’t. Now you’re here and he has to have Dick over so he doesn’t forget how to communicate with him.”

“Well he doesn’t have to be an ass about it,” Jason said as he crossed his arms. Dick turned around and gave Jason a look that said they were going to go home soon, Jason returned it with a small nod before Dick turned back to the computer, shaking his head and pointing at the monitors insistently. 

“You know Bruce,” Tim said. “He’s always going to be an ass about it.”

Impromptu Feast

For @svu-stories. Because everyone needs a little love and a good meal…

“Don’t be alarmed.”

“Don’t be… do you have any idea what I’ve been going through?”

Word of the shooting flooded through the speakers while you and Derek worked an authors’ luncheon uptown, the literary elite suddenly tuned into the report, undoubtedly wanting to use reality as the jumping off point for a possible bestseller. But you couldn’t wait for their version of events; you needed to hear your husband’s voice, to skip to the final page, the last sentence, to find the happy ending.

“And when I couldn’t get a hold of you, I—”

“I know, mi amor. And for what it’s worth, I am so sorry.”

Part of you longed to leap through the phone and give him a good shake. He had to know that your mind was doing cartwheels that ended in images of him bloodied and broken while chaos reigned above the steep, stone steps. But he was fine. He was talking to you. But where had be been?

“In the thick of it,” he continued. “It’s horrible…”

This wasn’t the first time that he’d been trapped in a courthouse riddled with bullets. In the wake of that melee he assured you that you were never far from his mind, that the thought that you were miles from harm’s way kept him going. And when you finally laid eyes on him again, his vest wrinkled and his sleeves rolled up, you let him hold you because he said that was what the only way for the world to make sense again.

“I’m sorry, too,” you murmured over the phone. “I can hear how scared you still are.”

Whatever was left of your anger ebbed away, and you thought of getting a late start on dinner or taking a ridiculously early stab at breakfast, asking him when he would come home.

“I don’t know.”

“But you are okay, right?” you asked.

“It’s not me. It’s Rollins.”

The blonde detective’s face flashed across your mind’s eye, and you clutched the phone tighter as you sank to the couch. Jingles sidled up for a pet, and you barely stroked her striped fur as the story spilled out.

“A bullet hit her neck. Just missed the jugular. But there… there was still so much blood.”

“Is she in surgery?” you asked, biting down on your lip.

“For the past two hours. The doctors are doing all that they….”

His voice drifted away. Was that Fin in the background? Straining to hear, desperate to know more, you tapped your foot and waited until Rafael’s voice returned to your ear.

“Sorry,” he started. “Just got word that the shooter didn’t make it.”

“Good,” you said.

Mi amor—”

“I know that’s mean. But right now, I don’t care. It could have been you. It…”

Now your voice faded as you jumped up, startling Jingles and causing the kitty cat to race behind the curtains as you reached for your coat.

“Where’s Jesse?” you quickly asked. “I can check in on her or—”

“Carisi’s sister has that covered,” Rafael assured you. “But it’s sweet of you to ask.”

You pictured him waiting in a white room under unforgiving lights with plastic chairs, subsisting on colored water that barely passed for coffee, making the nightmare worse.

“Can I check in on you?” you quietly asked. He forced a laugh to mask what had to be tears and hesitated before he spoke.

“I don’t want you out this late,” he said. “Just stay home. Where you’re safe.”

“Really?” you challenged. His silence lasted long enough for you to cut in with your next thought. “Because I can call a cab and have it waiting right outside. No stops until I reach you. What do you say to that?”

You were already looking for your purse when his sigh stopped you in your tracks.

“I say hurry,” he whispered. “Because I need you right now.”

“I’m on my way.”

The cab ride was quicker than you had envisioned. Which was a good thing. Rafael kept texting you as the driver passed through green lights with no need to switch lanes.

You must be so tired.

Like you’re not? I’m almost there.

I’m counting the seconds.

Just one minute more.

Tipping the driver and taking a brown paper bag in hand, you approached the sliding glass doors, ready to give Amanda’s name at the reception desk and text your husband one more time.


But then he was right there, his suit rumpled and his eyes bloodshot. You set the parcel aside and gathered him in your arms, grateful to hold him as he buried his head in your hair and fought to keep his sobs in check.

“Don’t do that.”

Pressing two fingers under his chin, you saw his eyes brimming and tenderly kissed his nose as you cradled his face.

“It’s okay to break down with me. That’s what I’m here for.”

“Is that all?” Before you could answer the question, he tightened his embrace, his fingers painting random circles into your back until he broke away and smiled into your eyes.

“For everything that you need,” you promised. “And I am far from empty-handed.”

He cocked his head as you retrieved the bag and granted him a peek inside.

“What is all this?” he asked.

“Brownies. Blondies. Chilled chicken salad. I even have some sourdough rolls and—”

“Did you… you couldn’t have whipped all this up while you waited for the cab.”

As nice as it would have felt to take credit for a miracle, especially now, you shook your head.

“This was for the thing with the musicians tomorrow.”

“Far be it from me to take food from a fiddler’s mouth,” he said.

“That’s adorable. But I called Derek. Told him that he’d have to improvise with his share and whatever’s on sight.”

“You didn’t have to—”

“Yes, I did. Because I want to take care of you. And your friends.”

He started to protest when he simply smiled and wrapped one arm around your shoulders.

“Who am I to say no to a free meal,” he muttered with a soft smile. “Or you.”

Taking the elevator to the hospital’s third floor, his hand firmly clasped in yours, you followed him as the metal doors slid open and saw the other members of the squad shuffling about the waiting room. Olivia conferred with a nurse at the reception desk while Fin huffed that he was going to see what he could find out in the other direction. That left Sonny slumped in one of the chairs, his head in his hands…

…his shirtsleeves stained with droplets of crimson.

Releasing Rafael, you laid your hand on his shoulder with a smile.

“Mrs. Barba,” Sonny started. “What beings you here?”

“Thought you all could use something to eat,” you said, squeezing his arm as your started to unpack the bag. As you set up your impromptu feast on the clear glass coffee table, pushing the outdated magazines aside, you started to make small talk when it seemed the wrong move. What was there to say? What could you do but feed the masses? Olivia greeted you and mumbled that there was no news, and Fin had fared no better at the other end of the hallway. Maybe this was a bad call; who could have an appetite under these circumstances?

“Is that chicken salad?” Sonny finally asked.

“Yes,” you told him. “I figured… I mean you guys probably haven’t had dinner or anything.”

“Not at the top of my list.”

His sharp tone caught you by surprise, and you hoped that you swallowed the shock back when he met your gaze.

“Sorry,” he said. “Don’t listen to me right now.” A tear brimmed in the corner of his eye, and you patted his knee and spoke softly.

“No need to apologize,” you assured him. “But you really should try to eat a little something.”

“Why?” he asked.

“Because… because there’s nothing in this world that a decent sandwich can’t fix.”

Did that sound trite? You searched for something else to say when the detective held out his hand and you prepared a plate, smiling as he took two bites.

“Thank you,” he said. “But I really can’t eat any—”

“It’s a start. The food’s not going anywhere.”

Neither were you.

You watched the others pick at the platter, Olivia and Fin thanking you even as they kept getting up, hoping for answers. As the hours clicked by, you found yourself sitting in Rafael’s lap, holding his hand and insisting that he eat just a little bit more.

“I love you for doing this,” he said.

“That the only reason?” you smirked.

“You know there’s so many others.”

You wiped his mouth with a checkered napkin, ready to listen to everything and anything he might say, when a doctor emerged in green scrubs and a smile on her face.

“Are you all here for Ms. Rollins?”

Everyone was on their feet, Rafael included, and you thought that maybe you should excuse yourself for a few seconds when Rafael kept you close.

“She’s stabilized and out of surgery,” the doctor continued. “The next twenty-four hours are crucial. But we have every reason to be optimistic.”

Fin was the first to sigh, and Olivia hugged Sonny as he struggled to speak.

“Can I… is it okay if I see her?” he asked.

“It’ll be another forty minutes or so. But then yes. I think it will do her good.”

Sonny turned around, seeming like his old self for the first time since your stepped off the elevator.

“You hear that!” he said. “It’s all good.”

“I’m so glad,” you said.

“Hey I’m… I’m sorry if I was short with you.”

“No worries. Bet you have more of an appetite now.”

Agreeing with a hug, he finished his sandwich in one swallow and ducked out to phone his sister. Olivia left to check in with Lucy and Fin decided to call the precinct as he picked up a brownie.

“Thanks for all this,” he said. “Barba, you’re a lucky guy.”

Once you were alone with your husband, his face relaxed as his smile brightened.

“What he said,” Rafael started. “Not that I deserve it.”

“I’m holding court right now. And my verdict is that you do.”

Tidying the table, you shot up at the feel of his arms around your waist and leaned into his warm touch, his lips dotting your neck.

“You’re not leaving, right?” he asked as he ran his fingers down your cheek.

“Not without you,” you replied.

“It’s still going to be awhile.”

“Darling, we have all the time in the world.”

Brushing your hands together, you sat with him, curling your legs on the cushions so you could cuddle into his chest. Good news for Amanda. A happy ending in the works. But…

“I’m so glad it wasn’t you,” you said. “Does that make me a horrible person?”

“No,” he said, seemingly without a second thought. “Because I’ve spent the better part of the day thanking God that it wasn’t you.”

“Not a lot of guns in a room full of writers,” you joked.

“Because the pen is mightier, right?”

“So they say.”

He handed you a brownie, insisted that you eat something. When you were done, he kissed you, the taste of his tongue mingling with the chocolate before he pulled away and peered into you eyes.

“And you, mi amor, are the mightiest of all.”

Clarity of expression 1/1

 Prompt from  @m-alycin “ I just don’t like the way they look at you”

(Sorry this has taken so long.  Work is crazy, time is limited and I have four half finished drabbles in my drafts…..three now lol)

Set in season one.  I don’t do much season one so it made a nice change!

References to Tooms and Beyond the Sea

If I’m completely honest with myself I have to admit that I could never have envisaged how my life would change so radically in just the few short months I have been partnered with Mulder.  It wasn’t something I ever asked for and certainly not an assignment I would ever have sought out for myself.

I’d heard about him of course - I mean, you can’t be around Quantico for more than a couple of days before someone decides it’s appropriate to regale you with a Spooky Mulder story and I certainly heard my fair share.  Mostly exaggerated, sometimes shocking, but always, without exception, told with a derisive edge that bordered on contempt.  And as much as I tried to remain professional, to not be drawn into the obvious sarcasm that was directed to this strange enigma of a man who had fallen from grace at a speed that only equalled his meteoric rise, it was almost impossible to not react with a smirk whenever his name was mentioned by one of my peers.

The man was a legend it seemed.  But for all the wrong reasons and so when I was given the news that I was to be assigned to work alongside him I briefly considered refusing - or at least making some attempt to plead my case - that I had been hoping to distinguish myself, to carve out a career that would vindicate me in my decision to forgo the majority of my medical training and to trade scrubs for suits.  A fast track descent down to the basement lair of a man who seemed intent on destroying his reputation piece by painful piece was not my idea of a favourable career move it’s fair to say.

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