[cont] what if they really were dating in the beginning but they aren’t anymore. I mean, Louis does seem genuinely pissed off about the rumours. And admittedly, he really is quite “flamboyant”, as he put it, and very touchy-feely (not only with Harry), but not every hetero guy has to fit the typical no homo dudebro image, right? I do believe Harry is at least bi/pan, or even gay, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’s dating Louis..? So yeah, these are just some of my thoughts, but […] -L
[cont2] I’m pretty sure you’re more into that whole matter so please PLEASE feel free to prove me wrong. (Wow sorry this just turned into a three part ask, but I really couldn’t make it shorter) -L
Well, three days is probably a bit soon to completely make up your mind—to form a firm conclusion you have to be able to run through all of the possible scenarios, like, they’re both queer but not dating, they’re just friends with benefits, they were together at the beginning but not any more (presumably since late May 2012 when the iron closet was first imposed), they have an open relationship, they cheat on each other, it’s fan service/queer baiting, etc etc. And then having gone through all the alternative explanations for what you see, you need to be able to point to concrete instances and ask, does this make this particular scenario plausible or not so plausible?
It also helps to be able to distinguish what’s more important from what’s less important. Louis’ flamboyancy isn’t really /that/ important. What’s more important are more concrete indications of sexual attraction, like commenting on somebody’s physical attractiveness, constant staring and touching, making sexual innuendo about them. And what I always say is my own personal heuristic evaluating what I see: distinguishing between what’s done for attention, what’s not done for attention, what’s easy to fake, what’s not easy to fake. I myself always paid close attention to signs of physical intimacy between them that would be very hard to fake, especially since the beginning and over time, and so for me their body language has been the number one reason grounding what I see. Others feel less confident about that and so for their them their number one reason are the tattoos—which are not something people not in a relationship are going to do, nor will they do it to fake a relationship, it’s way too permanent and there are easier ways of faking a relationship. For me, their tattoos are a strong number two. But Louis and Harry have been so strictly separated that you can’t see them interact and judge the nature of their interactions, which means that at this point you basically have the tattoos to tell you that they haven’t recently broken up. He got the dagger though, and all that.
I am very grateful to theharryandlouistreatise for laying it all out in a systematic way (this is also helpful). I myself basically have it all in my head and scattered in various tags on my blog, because I went through this process for myself a long time ago. And it’s a good place to go to so that you can go through the process—because we all need to make up our minds for ourselves—especially so that I don’t have to write a new treatise for new visitors every other day, which would get exhausting for me and make it difficult for me to move on to new discussions.
ETA: Looking for a time when I quoted Lessing on ‘rules of thumb’ heuristics I found this old post.