I don't want to be disrespectful I just don't have a lot of experience with ace people... But do you think you're going to be ace forever or do you think you're ace until you find the right person? Don't hate me idk :(
Oh man, I’ve gotten this question so many times now… I understand that you’re not trying to be disrespectful, but I mean, google is a thing… heck, here’s a link to AVEN (the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) if you want to learn more.
Look, asexuality is not a fad, it’s not a phase - it’s part of your identity, part of your sense of self. It’s just as valid as any other sexuality - pan, gay, bi, etc.
Speaking of bisexuality, this is something that bisexual people get hounded on a lot for too. Part of bi erasure is a culture that asks (from both the straight and the lgbt community) “are you eventually gonna settle down and pick a side?” There is no “side” to pick, being bi is being bi. Period.
In this instance, those who are ace and those who are bi face the same problem. Ace people are not secretly straight, or secretly gay - we’re ace. Asking if an ace person will someday “meet the right person to give them a sense of sexual attraction” is a nonsensical question, and frankly it only helps to undermine the validity of asexuality. I mean, you wouldn’t go up to a lesbian and say “hey, do you think you’ll ever meet the right guy to turn you straight?” This type of question represents a fundamental misunderstanding of how sexuality and attraction work.
Now I also understand that sexuality is fluid - it can change over time. But even so, you must respect the sexuality that a person identifies with at the moment. The fact that it’s fluid does not give you a pass to ask if someone will “meet the right person” - it’s still a rude question.
Thanks for asking anon!! (And no, I don’t hate you. I’m just tired of answering that question)