art school humor

"37 Slogans For College Majors If They Were Actually Honest"

Accounting: selling your soul for money.

Aerospace Engineering: “it actually is rocket science.”

Anthropology: it’ll get you laid, but it won’t get you paid!

Archeology: if you don’t know what it is, it’s probably ceremonial.

Art History: and you thought making art was pointless!

Astrophysics: “Eh, I’m within an order of magnitude…”

Biochemistry: spend 4 years aspiring to discover the cure for cancer, and the rest of your life manufacturing shampoo.

Chemistry: where alcohol is a solution.

Communications: “we’ll teach you everything you need to know about convincing your friends that your degree is actually meaningful.”

Computer Engineering: tons of chicks, just not very many.

Computer Science (for a straight girl): the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

Creative Writing: because job security is for pussies.

Criminal Justice: we’re here because of Law & Order reruns.

Dental Hygienist: “something to do until you get knocked up.”

Engineering: the art of figuring out which parameters you can safely ignore.

English: so you want to be a teacher.

Film: forks on the left, knives on the right.

Finance: “accounting was too hard.”

Graphic Design: no, we’re not artists.  We’re designers; there’s a difference.

History: history may repeat itself, but you definitely will.

Information Technology: let me Google that for you.

Journalism: learn how to construct an argument that no one will listen to.

Latin: because useful is overrated.

Linguistics: studied 17 languages, fluent in none of them.

Marine Biology: “I wanted to play with dolphins, but I’m looking at algae instead.”

Music Performance: if you don’t hate yourself, you’re doing it wrong.

Nursing: learning to save others’ lives while struggling not to take your own.

Philosophy: think about it.

Photography: it’s worth a shot.

Physics: “everything you learned last week was wrong.”

Political Science: your opinion is wrong

Pre-med: “I’ll probably switch majors in two years.”

Psychology: good luck doing anything until you get your Masters.

Speech Pathology: we have a way of making you talk.

Statistics: where everything’s made up, and numbers don’t matter.

Structural Engineering: because architects don’t know what physics is.

Zoology: because you can’t major in kittens.

What I learned from my first semester at art school:
  • Everyone is gay
  • Everyone is really hot
  • Everyone has anxiety and/or depression
  • Scholars in the field of art history define contemporary aesthetics as ‘critical reflection on art, culture, and nature’
  • Seriously I know literally one straight person everyone is gay
  • If you lie on the floor in the middle of your dorm hallway nobody will get mad, they’ll just nod and agree
  • Finals week is when you stay up all night and inhale charcoal dust until your boogers turn black
  • Everyone is amazing at art and it feels amazing
  • You scream constantly but you scream together
  • As it turns out, not every building with pillars is the parthenon
  • I made earrings out of teeth but someone in my visual language class has a shirt they bleed on every time they get a bloody nose and they use it for blood splatter references so I fit in great

anonymous asked:

as per that one text post going around - Bitty with a nose ring!!!!

you’re in luck, anon, because i’ve actually already done this in great detail! 

but hey, this is my favorite headcanon & we never did capture how poor Jacques™ felt about all that beautiful bling, so one more time with feeling

INTJ at School #40

INTJ: (uses deadpan sarcastic humor)

People around him in class: (horrified)

ENFP: He’s joking guys. If he says something like that you can just assume that he’s not serious.

INTJ: (inwardly) Thanks, ENFP. Thanks a lot. Now they’ll never take me seriously. I was looking forward to messing with those mortals’ minds for at least the first semester…

The very kind SDM follower @rinipan passed along this school mural, and it was too incredible not to share.

Look, it has all your favorite Scooby-Doo characters!

There’s Suspicious Daphne…

…Panicking Disco-Dance Freddy…

…Just-Left-The-Dentist Scooby…

…Picasso’s Interpretation of Shaggy…

…and Deranged Zombie Velma!

Also, that’s totally my new profile pic.

How did you know my biggest weakness

Made this Italian instead of Chinese for @kevbrinx (check his italian comics out!)