Wacky head cannon : take two

The Juvenile Wing at Arkham is one of the worst wings to work on. It’s beaten only by High Security mainly because they have the Joker.

That was until Jason Todd was incarcerated there.
Overnight nurses on juvie found if they so much as mentioned the Red Hood being downstairs the kids, went to bed, ate their food and generally behaved themselves.

Eventually, news of this reached Jason. The next day he was escorted into the wing where he pinned a list of rules on the notice board. Turning he informed the shell shocked teenagers that they were to follow the rules or he would be ‘very disappointed’ in them.
Whilst leaving he pondered when exactly he’d turned into Alfred?

From then on the Juvenile Wing went from one of the worst to one of the best wings to work on and shifts there were a blessed relief.

All of the teenage delinquents got A’s in English that term. The nurses bragged about this in the staff room. When asked what book the paper was on they said it was ‘Pride and Prejudice’
The nurses from high security openly wept.

Batman was informed about the progress the kids were making. He never made the connection.

*might add this into a fic I’m writing but not sure*

anonymous asked:

Can I ask for Batman trying to stop Croc from almost killing Crane in Arkham Asylum?

ohhhh yeah! 


There was nothing more unbearable than Nigma screeching in your ears like a banshee while you were trying to find your way to the sewers of Arkham Asylum, all the while trying not to be seen or heard by the dumb guards waiting in front of the door. That being said, this had to be the first time Edward sounded genuinely panicked and that probably was the reason why Batman didn’t shut the radio down entirely. 

Save him? 

Save who?

“… Yeah, the boss said he wouldn’t be coming out of here anyway. Good for him. I never liked this creep!


Batman froze up. No need for Edward to add anything, the guards had answered his question already. He jumped off the elevator, knocked the two men out and ran inside the sewers.

And here he was, standing proudly with his stupid toxin in hand, readying himself to die. 



He couldn’t hear Edward. Had he even heard Batman at all? Bruce couldn’t be sure. All Crane was doing now was dancing and hopping around like a giggly schoolgirl. Where had he learned to do that in the first place? Where had he been taught to move like a ninja when he was so sick, so skinny and… 

A roar coming from the water forcibly pulled the vigilante out of his thoughts and he stared in horror as Crane was grabbed by Killer Croc like a mere stick of of wood.


No no no no no no…

Throwing an electrified batarang at him, Batman almost let out a cry of victory when he saw Croc contort himself in pain. He then rushed over to the mutant, jumping and kicking him in the face hard enough to make him let go of Crane before hopping backward and grabbing Jonathan to run out of the sewers with him. He hid beneath the stairs and grimaced upon seeing the poor sight Crane now was. Oh god… Clawing marks, pieces of skin hanging loosely from his face, torso and back… And his leg was twisted in an unnatural way. As for his arm, it had almost been torn apart. 

“… Fuck this damn asylum.” Batman whispered “… I’m taking you to the hospital.”

Joker could wait. 

In his ears, Edward was sobbing.