are-you-allowed-to-do-that

sidney crosby // to have and to hold

requested by @pensphan4life

warnings: none

who: sidney x reader

premise: the day of your wedding

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The one thing being engaged hasn’t allowed you to do is think. Every detail of your wedding had to be perfect and the only way you could assure that was by micromanaging every part of it. From the buttons on your dress to the color of the cake piping, you had to know about everything.

In the few breaks that planning allotted you, you had to shove in your full time job, hockey and spending time with your fiancé, Sidney Crosby.

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anonymous asked:

hello may i have your advice on whether or not it's reasonable to break up with someone because you cannot take care of yourself, let alone them too? My girlfriend can't even take care of herself, which means i step up and have to take care of her too, which is tough since i'm barely managing as well. and i love her, but i also can't risk another flare (i have lupus), so i don't know if i should leave her or not

Hi sweetie! That is completely reasonable. It’s a hard situation, and it’s sad, of course, as breakups so often are, but darling, you are allowed to put yourself first and be good to yourself. You are allowed to have needs and you are allowed to do what you need to do to get those needs met. I’m sending you (both) so much love and support during this rough time <3 <3 <3 

  • Genji: the good thing about being mostly a robot now is that I'm allowed to walk around totally naked and nobody minds
  • Zenyatta: [a robot, wearing Pants] literally nobody said you were allowed to do that

You deserve to change and decorate your body as much or as little as you want. You deserve tattoos or piercings or wearing clothes that express how you feel inside or covering up as much or as little as you want. You deserve to cut your hair or grow it out long or wear a bedhead if you want. You deserve to take hormones or get surgery if you want. You deserve and are allowed to do anything to your body that you feel will make you more like you, and the only person’s opinion you need to listen to is yours.

There is a distinct difference between caring for someone and carrying someone.

Know the difference.

You are allowed to let people down when they are too heavy.

You are not a bad person because you have limits.

If you’re not a morning person, you know the struggle. It’s not just about waking up, it’s about actually getting yourself to do stuff in the morning. While I usually recommend you adapt to your body’s own schedule, as you’ll work much better, school, work or other activities may not allow you to do so. Therefore, here’s a guide on how to get shit done in the morning.

The night before

  • Prepare whatever study materials you’re going to use that day. Open your notes and make sure you know where you should start (i personally lay a pen on the exact paragraph).
  • Put a bottle of water and some tea (with caffeine) or coffee on your desk so that you don’t have to go get it next morning. 
  • If you’re usually cold in the mornings, get yourself a blanket. I promise you mine has made me more productive than all the coffee I’ve ever had.
  • Write a to-do list for next day. Then distribute those tasks in a schedule (you can either use a printable or just scribble it on some piece of paper). Take into account you’ll need time for breakfast and personal hygiene. 
  • Other than that, don’t leave anything else on your desk, as it may be distracting.
  • Make an effort to go to bed at least an hour earlier. It makes a huge difference when you wake up 

Actually waking up

if you struggle to wake up, try the following:

  • Ask someone to wake you up (a parent, a roommate).
  • Put your phone accross the room and inside a glass to amplify the sound.
  • If your phone has an option for voice alarm, use it. Make it something really motivating or, even better, really annoying.
  • Combine all of the above for foolproof results.

Tips to get stuff done

  1. Chug your liquids! - The very first thing you should do after your feet touch the floor is drink some water and drink something caffeinated (yes, in that order) (caffeine because it will kick in by the time you’re done with breakfast and water because caffeine can be dehydrating + water will also jumpstart your body).
  2. Put on some fluffy socks - okay maybe this is just a personal thing but I’m personally much less likely to go back to bed once i have some socks on.
  3. Smol workout - do something that will send blood to your brain. It can literally be ten jumping jacks.
  4. Breakfast? Not yet - you’ve gotten up, you want food, understandable. BUT remember that book/notebook you put on your table last night? Well, get to work on it for 15-30 minutes. You may be sleepy and not able to comprehend much of what you’re doing, but the important thing is that once you come back from having breakfast, you will already have started, which is the most difficult part.
  5. Avoid anything with a shit-ton of sugar - it will give you a sugar crash in about an hour and all you’ll want to do is go back to bed. (Personal rec is overnight oats with some fruit on top - delicious, fast af and super filling and energizing).
  6. A big breakfast can make you sleepy. Instead, make it a little bit smaller and have some healthy snacks (like hummus) throughout the morning. Look at them as your reward for studying.
  7. Stay off the internet. During breakfast, I find that social media (especially youtube) tend to put me off working afterwards, as they give me something more insteresting to do. Therefore I reccommend you either find something else to do (write your to do list, read a book) or limit your Internet time to 5-10 minutes.
  8. Remember that you control your mindset. If after doing all of this you still don’t feel like studying, it’s perfectly okay to stare at your desk for five minutes and have an argument with yourself about how much you do want to study. Seems stupid but trust me, it works most of the time.

Other masterposts

In case your upbringing taught you otherwise, you are allowed to enjoy yourself. You are allowed to do things that make you happy. It’s not lazy or wrong to take the time to do the things that make you feel good. My parents taught me that I wasn’t allowed to be happy or do things that I love. And that’s not ok. Give that new hobby a go. Draw/paint/sew/cook that thing. It’s not a waste of time. Your pleasure isn’t a waste of time. You are allowed to smile and have fun. And don’t feel bad for it.

Advancing beyond 'Witchcraft 101'

I want to talk a little bit about letting go of that beginner stage and actually advancing in your knowledge and your abilities.

You were unsure about getting started, and nervously bought your first book on witchcraft, and it was probably Wiccan. You devoured it and became eager for more, knowing that you were on the right path. You soon amassed a great deal of Witchcraft 101 books, and likely a lot of tools that you may not have used. You’ve noticed the differences in your books: one says to have the altar in the north, another says the east, a third says in the centre of the circle. You probably know a lot of the magical properties of many common herbs and crystals, having zealously memorised lists of correspondences. You’ve performed spells and rituals from those books verbatim. And now you’re starting to feel stalled. At least, that’s how it was for me.

‘Witchcraft 101’ is, I found, a safe zone. You could make mistakes, or doubt your own knowledge, because you were just a beginner. But you soon feel that you’re safely on a precipice, and off the edge is the big wide unknown. You feel that you’ve become a big fish in a small pond. (Who doesn’t love a good mixed metaphor?). For me, acknowledging that I had grown beyond Witchcraft 101 was a big step, both as a witch and as a person. It takes confidence and courage to say “I am ready to move forward.” I worried that it smacked of arrogance saying that I had mastered the basics, or that I was trying to advance too far too quickly. But that isn’t the case at all. In every form of education you must give yourself credit for what you have learned, and allow yourself to move onto more challenging subjects. So it is for witchcraft, as well.

There was also the fear of being a fraud. Of not being worthy to call myself a witch next to someone who has been practicing a lifetime longer than I have. A fear that other witches would look down their nose at me. “What would he know?” they’d say. But that fear was thoroughly unfounded. When I spoke up, contributed my opinion and my knowledge to discussions, it was met with welcome.

Give yourself permission to advance. Only you can know when you’re ready to move beyond the basics, but you have to allow yourself to do that. You have to acknowledge your knowledge, to own your wisdom. You’ll still make mistakes, you’ll still stumble over some concepts, you’ll still be confused by things, and that’s okay. But witches weren’t made to live in safe zones. We were made to step off the precipice and fly.

just a word to anybody who is active in the stim community, especially neurotypical folks. anybody who likes slime, or mixing paint, or watching somebody put frosting on a cake. whatever it may be!

there is one thing you are not allowed to do. you do not get to freely indulge in visual stims, and then turn around and mock people who stim in other ways. by flapping, rocking, humming, using pressure, wiggling their fingers, and much, much more.

because if you openly embrace one part of the stim community, then you sure as hell better be as welcoming to those of us who stim in other ways as well.

i mean, sure, i can’t really stop you from reblogging that pretty gif with the sea glass slime or from making a stimboard for taako from the adventure zone if you only accept the “pretty” side of stimming.

but i can let you know that you are not welcome in our community. and i will be judging you for every second where you’re unable to accept that there’s more to stimming than the visuals.

story time.

i went to a weird tech high school where you were pretty much allowed to do almost anything, and you were given an expensive macbook laptop to do ur homework and other shit on. its like normal high school except u could get up and go to the bathroom whenever and not get into trouble (kids asked anyway who am i kidding we feared getting yelled at jus for needing to take a whizz)

and one day, first year, two months in, the school had a big gathering because they were having a problem. yknow, with the expensive macbook laptops.

they were getting cease and desist warnings from dreamworks because somebody was downloading 25 illegal digital copies of the bee movie, every day, for two weeks straight. they were being threatened with lawsuits, so the principal and vice principal basically rounded up all these meme-infused teenagers, and told them, “stop downloading the bee movie. we could get shut down because of you. please stop.”

and it went on for another week because, whoever this kid was, hated this school so much. so much so that they tried to have it shut down in the most fucking ridiculous way possible. by downloading the bee movie, staring jerry seinfield, as many times as possible. illegally.

i remember one early morning, after i got my breakfast burrito, some friends ushered me over to one of the lunch tables and pointed to another friend’s computer. a pirating site was open, and the kid who was responsible was actually a friend of mine. they looked at me, the biggest shit-eating grin on their face, and pointed to, you guessed it, 25 illegal digital copies of jerry seinfelds the bee movie downloading all at once on internet explorer.

the real kicker was that, since the laptops were technically purchased and owned by the school, they werent tied to any of the kids legally. just the school as a whole. so no names or faces were mentioned at all in the illegal downloadings of almost 100+ copies of the bee movie, staring jerry seinfeld.

so the kid was never caught.

I hate when people say like “you can’t kill yourself, you’re not allowed to do that.”
It’s like UHM THIS IS MY LIFE AND ARE YOU THE ONE THAT HAS TO DEAL WITH MY PAIN? NO, EXACTLY SO STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO. HERE IS A TIP: hug me and say “I love you, and I’m gonna miss you if you disappear. Please stay here, everything is going to be okay.” THAT HELPS A LITTLE MORE.


sorry for angry post.

Imagine Your OTP...
  • <p> <b>Person A:</b> This is a big ass teddy bear...<p/><b>Person B:</b> If you say yes next year's will be bigger...<p/><b>Person A:</b> You're serious?<p/><b>Person B:</b> You're the most beautiful little shit.<p/><b>Person C:</b> Jesus Christ...<p/><b>Person A:</b> What if I say no?<p/><b>Person B:</b> I'll fall into a ditch.<p/><b>Person A:</b> If we date I'll push you in a ditch.<p/><b>Person B:</b> As long as it's you I'll allow it.<p/><b>Person A:</b> Why do you want to date me?<p/><b>Person B:</b> I have a list of reasons I need you in my life, the main being both your inner and outer beauty always captives me.<p/><b>Person A:</b> I don't know if I should be flattered or intimated by the big words...<p/><b>Person B:</b> You also know all the words to High School Musical so we can go as Troy and Gabriella for Halloween.<p/><b>Person A:</b> Buy me Burger King and we binge watch Bob's Burgers tonight.<p/><b>Person B:</b> YES!<p/><b>Person C:</b> *coughs*<p/><b>Person B:</b> I mean yeah, cool, totally.<p/></p>
2

Everyday that you get to work in music, I feel like it’s impossible not to love the people who allow you to do that. It’s amazing to have people who want to listen to something that you’ve made. It’s the biggest compliment.

Regardless of what anyone else thinks; you are your own self. Your body was born to turn out a specific way, naturally, and you must allow it to do its own thing. There is no ‘perfect’ body. There is only a body, which is beautiful in its own right. You only have the one that you’re currently living in, remember that. Try to respect it and take care of it, for its amazing and is your sacred temple! It doesn’t matter what others think; your health is FAR more important than getting satisfaction from others.

Practice Makes Better

I know people like the rhetoric that, if you do something for long enough, you’ll get really good at it. And the thing is that that’s not always true. And that’s okay.

I did gymnastics for 13 years. I was okay at it, but I never got really good. I spent nine years playing viola and was first chair mostly by virtue of there only being two violists in the orchestra. And that was okay.

You’re allowed to do something you’re not great at, and you’re allowed to enjoy it. You’re allowed to love writing–you’re allowed to love your writing–without being published, without having 1000 kudos on AO3 or 500 comments or even showing your work to anyone. You’re allowed to love writing and never get good at characterization or plotting or the world’s best worldbuilding. You don’t need to be the next Stephen King or J. K. Rowling. 

My gymnastics coach always used to say “Practice doesn’t make perfect. Practice makes better.”

You don’t need to strive for perfect. You just should strive for better.

Shout out to all the folks hurting because of sensory issues. You are beautiful and real. You are allowed to do what you need to do to feel okay.

Stim. Sing, shout, flap, rock, find good sensory input.

Avoid. Wear ear protectors, sit in a dark room, Leave the space if something is hurting you.

I know it’s hard especially out in public. Remember that your comfort and safety is important and you are not being rude.