are you still reading this god

(A BatIM fanfiction)

‘Dear Joey,

If you’re reading this, then you’ve probably made it back to the studio and have seen first hand what I went through in your absence. I turned on your machine, which I assume is what you wanted me to find, and discovered its very- interesting (and I use that term lightly) purpose.

I can’t believe that in the last 30 years, you’ve managed to keep our dreams alive in one of the most fiendish ways possible. You also managed to kill them, mangle them, and turn them against us! What started as a brain child of two friends sitting in a coffee shop is now chasing me down the halls of our studio! They’re out for our blood!

I’ve resorted to writing my last will and testament on the back of an old soup lable, praying to any God out there that’s listening that the ink I’m using won’t jump off the page and attack me! I would have used some of the paper from my old sketches, but get this Joey, they can travel via paper too!

In case you didn’t already gather from where you found this letter, Sammy was still here, but he’s dead now, Joey! Our old music director is dead! Maybe swallowed whole by Bendy! He tried to sacrifice me to a cartoon character that SHOULDN’T be alive!

~~~

Joey, if you’re still reading, I have to ask: What the hell were you thinking!? I can’t get a word in to these guys edgewise, so my fate lies souly in YOUR words from years ago. I didn’t ask for any of this to happen. I thought I was just visiting my old friend!

You turned me into a villain for crimes I didn’t know I was apparently committing by moving on with my own life.

I’d ask you myself, but Joey if you had to read this letter instead of hearing it from me, that means I probably didn’t make it out of this studio alive.

- Your old pal,

Henry Ross.’

(Inspired loosely by a fanfiction written by @vitalpen for @squigglydigglydoo ’s BatIM AU (seriously some of the best BatIM fanon content. Please check that one out if you haven’t yet.))

The Parker Twins Masterlist

This is a giant collab with Jadyn, @imaginingadifferentlife , and since we’re deciding to continue with it and make more from this idea, why not make a masterlist for just The Parker Twins? I really think this is going to become a bigger series because we have so many ideas for it. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: you do not need to read the part series to understand the others, but it’s still fun to check out!

Series that actually work together:

1. Total Opposites

2. The Parker Twins (pre-civil war)

3. The Parker Twins Two: Super Suit (pre-civil war)

4. The Parker Twins Three: God, You Are So Dramatic

Behind The Scenes:

Biggest Fears

this is kind of a personal post i had the urge to make suddenly. 

so, over the past four or five years (or even longer tbh) i’ve had a very complicated relationship with religion. i live in good old nc and so you can imagine the religious atmosphere here. if you can’t, it’s all baptists. and while discovering myself, i always felt very outside. because i didn’t believe in their god, had different opinion than them, and so on. it was straining. it still is. so i considered myself an atheist. but recently i decided to look into judaism. i realized that i have faith i just needed to figure out what kind. and something just clicked the more i started reading into judaism (i’ve done a fair amount of reading on reform judaism, not nearly enough to say i’m an expert though). and i’ve made the decision to convert. something about it just feels right. however, this seems to be more of a struggle than i thought considering the lack of resources where i live. but, i just wanted to let you guys know the decision i’ve made.

i don’t know why i felt the need to share this. 

2

“Makeup or Breakup.” - Leorai & Apritello Fanfic - By Me.

Contains Strong Language & Stuff! 

(My version of the turtles in ALL My fanfics are different ages 16-20)  

Chapter 1 - I Hate You!

Leo’s P.O.V

*Sigh*… It happened again. Karai and I, arguing none stop, breaking us further and further apart each day… I haven’t seen her since last night, god knows where she’s gone to, or what she’s doing… Heading into the kitchen, in hope, Karai will be in there so I can. “Oh, Just Raph.” *Soft Sigh* Seeing him alone reading his comic with a beer. “Hey Raph, have you seen Karai?” I asked, wondering if he was in the best of moods to talk… “Nah, haven’t seen her.”… Okay, he’s talking, he’s in a good mood today. But still, Raph hasn’t seen Karai either. *Sigh* “Okay… Thanks, anyway Raph.” “Leo wait!” As I was about to leave, only to hear Raph stop me… “Have a beer with me, what’s bugging ya?” Raph said, sliding a bottle across the counter a bit, I paused for a moment, but  there was no excuse for me not to drink… “Who’s pissed ya off This time?” Raph asked as I sat on the side, taking the beer and opened it, only to stay quiet… “No one’s pissed me off… Well, Karai, I mean *SIGH* She’s Just So…” Unable to get my words out right, my hand clenched the glass bottle… Okay, we had problems, but it’s gone too far and now I think Karai is to the point of leaving me for good… “Oh God, I Can’t Lose Her.” My mind raced, filled with worries and thoughts, taking my first sip, only to realize I took a mouthful of my beer… “Raphael… I Need Help!” I said worryingly. *SIP* “Leo, You haven’t told me Shit, Stop Bitching About It Already And Tell Me!” Raph’s sudden order snapped me from my thoughts. “Karai Hates Me, Raph!” Banging my beer down onto the counter, whoa, sudden rage coming on… Calm yourself, Leo… “What, the fuck are ya talking about?” Looking at me, Raph waited… Silence… “We keep arguing constantly… I hate it, and seeing her upset hurts too but…” *Soft Sigh*… “I want our relationship to be like Donnie’s and April’s.” I stopped to breath… “Leo, you can’t compare you’re relationship with Karai to Donnie’s.” Raph somehow made me think… Maybe I’m trying Too hard that it’s just making Karai frustrated and tired or… Or maybe Karai Really does hate me… “Oh Who Am I Kiddin’? I’m The Worst Boyfriend In The World!” My head filled with thoughts again, letting out a groan as my head hit the counter… Groaning. “Karai deserves someone better than me, Raph.”

*SIGH* “BUT YOU ARE THAT SOMEONE, LEO!” Suddenly Raph’s shout got my attention! He sounded serious, more than usual. “What is it You, like most about Karai?” He asked me. Getting me thinking, hard, only to feel my stomach flutter, like… Like how I felt when we first met. “Well, I love her hair, so soft and silky. *Giggles* She has these eyes, Raph that. Wow, and her fighting skills are beyond… Amazing! And.” *Soft Sigh* “She has the cutest smile ever.” Raph listened, my feelings towards Karai and the things that makes her special to me, but… There’s still one thing that was missing during our time of being together… But What?… Taking another gulp of my beer before Raph spoke. “Leo, when was it the last time you took Karai out on a date… A Proper Date?” Raph asked… *GASP* Suddenly it struck a cord in me. Hitting me Hard in the chest. “No wonder Karai hates me. Oh I’ve never taken her out on a date.” I said to Raph with a moan. My heart broke in two. A whole year of being with Karai and I haven’t taken her out on a date… That’s why she hates my guts! Holding it in all this time, building up inside her until… Until it get’s to that moment when she, leaves me… “Whoa, Leo man, your worse than I thought.” Looking up at Raph as he responded, he was concerned for me, finishing my beer as did he, only to see Raph was on his third beer. Well, it was a Saturday, Raph’s drinking weekend along with Mikey who joined him. 

My mind raced. And it wasn’t the booze… “Raph, You Gotta Help Me!” Grabbing him by the shoulders, Raph blinked, shocked, but pushed me back. “Sorry Leo, Your on your own.” “But!” “Leo, just talk to Donnie, he’ll help ya.” Raph advised me to speak to Donnie… To Donnie? “Why Donatello?” I asked with a shock. “Well, he Is in a relationship like you, Leo. He can help, at least.” “THAT’S PERFECT!” Suddenly my heart started to beat, maybe Donnie could help me win Karai back… *YANK* “AH! LEO WHAT THE!” “Thanks Raph.” I couldn’t help it, yanking Raph into a tight hug… But I could tell the booze was getting to Raph’s head… “Alright, Leo let go now, Fuck your breathe smells like Mikey’s room.” “HEY I HEARD THAT!” Mikey yelled from outside the kitchen, letting go of Raph, I grabbed the half bottle of Raph’s forth beer and drank the rest. “HEY!” I ran out of the kitchen laughing… “DAMMIT LEO YOU BASTARD!” Hearing Raph shout as I went to see Donnie, Suddenly. *Gasp* “Karai!” Seeing her coming down the steps, her hair was dripping wet, knowing now it was raining outside… But still, she’s here. I raced and hugged her… But. Something was wrong… She wasn’t hugging me back!

TBC - Chapter 2 - Karai’s P.O.V                          

iwasapruneratfaverolles  asked:

PLEASE TELL THE CHILDREN THE STORY OF MS. STUBELS

Grace fuck, why would you invoke her name like that???

Okay, fine, gather round children, buckle up because we’re going on a bumpy ride back to everyone’s collective least favorite place: 7th grade.

Some background: I went to a very small Catholic school. One class per grade (we were the largest with 19 kids), everyone knew each other whether they wanted to or not. Despite basically every teacher and faculty members insistence that we were The Best And Most Special Class In The School and that everyone loved having us, the longstanding 7th grade teacher Mrs. O’Hara decided to retire in the summer of 2008, meaning the school had to find us a new teacher for the upcoming year. This would be like, the first new teacher in the school in a while, and as she was getting the ‘best class’, it was viewed as a Big Deal. Somewhere in like July or August we got a letter announcing Mrs. Stubel, and it came with a list of books to pick for the summer reading, and that was basically all the information we had.

So…the first day of class. She seems nice enough. Very…ditsy, I guess? It was very easy for her to get herself off topic while talking. She constantly paced around the room, never staying in one spot for longer than a second, complaining she has restless leg syndrome. Which like, I’m sure she did, but she was in the middle of introducing herself and then went on a 20 minute tangent about restless leg syndrome without anyone prompting her. It was almost like you could see her scattered thoughts flying around her head.

So anyone, she eventually gives somewhat of an introduction- she had only taught in public schools before, and kept worrying she ‘didn’t know’ how to teach in a Catholic school despite the entire class insisting literally nothing was different, you just teach the curriculum, twice a week we have religion class with Sister Mary King, that’s literally it (she still talked over us in worry), she told us about her kids, she told us about her obsession with Emily Dickinson, stuff like that.

And then she hands us this worksheet.

She’s like, “Oh, these are just some basic questions for you to answer! Just so I can get to know you guys better!” like in lieu of an icebreaker game, which is fine, but…the questions. The questions were all “What is your most haunting fear?”, “What is your deepest regret?”, “Have you ever experienced the pain of loss?”, “What was your worst injury?”, “What was your worst nightmare?”, all questions like that, and then on the back she wanted us to draw a gravestone and write out what we wanted our epitaph to be.

We were twelve year olds, mind you.

Oh my God and one girl missed the first day because of her grandmother’s funeral, so when she came the next day and saw what the teacher was insisting she do for homework, she almost had a panic attack? And the lady still made her do it? Literally who wants to think about death anymore at a time like that omfg.

Okay, so then we get to the summer reading book reports, right? Now, she had given a list of maybe, 20 books that you could pick from, read it, and then present an oral report on it. You had to have notecards and you had to be able to answer questions from the class at the end. All in all, I’ve had worse projects.

So, on this list, she apparently put Madeleine L’Engle’s entire book series on the list…only she did not make it known that this was a series and not multiple stand alone books, so when reports started up it caused mass-panic of kids trying to put together plot points and make connections on what the hell they had read.

I was the only kid in the class who had chosen to read “A Wrinkle In Time”, and that has since lead to a series of events that…really actually scares me, I’m still incredibly freaked out, I’m not going to get into it right now because it’ll take away from the current story, but just know that I’m not above wondering if it only happened because I read the book for Stubel.

Anyway, so like, I got through the report okay. The class asking questions about it was fine, but the teacher kept asking questions that didn’t make sense, like, at all. My friend Angie has always had super neat handwriting and Mrs. Stubel got like, obsessed with her notecards and asked if she could borrow them for something. When we got our grades back a few weeks later, Angie had points taken off for not having notecards.

And then her teaching just…didn’t happen. She’d never stay on a topic, she’d always get herself distracted! We were not learning anything. And like, this wasn’t a class of advanced smart kids that loved to learn. By all accounts we should’ve been thrilled. But it got out of hand. It got to points where we had to start teaching lessons to ourselves, asking teacher from other grades for help, always coming home in tears, complaining constantly to our parents and the principal because this woman wasn’t teaching us anything. There were two kids who asked her multiple times for extra help, and she told them each time to ‘talk to me after school’, but then she’d leave immediately after school so they wouldn’t be able to talk to her. They finally brought up the issue in the middle of class and she had a breakdown, yelling about how nobody ever thinks that maybe the teacher has a lot of work to do, and maybe she’s entitled to taking off early, but when we tried to argue she shouldn’t schedule meetings and then break them off in the name of relaxation, she stormed out of the room and tried to get the principal to give us detention. (Which, like, our school didn’t even do, and she was the only one in the wrong during this situation) We are still in September at this point, and already at least ten kids have parents considering transferring them to another school. (And remember, there was only 19 of us, and most of the class had been together since preschool, so that was a big deal).

Then, she starts coming in with all the weird bruises. All the Moms™ immediately started gossiping that her husband had to be beating her, and that’s why she was so screwy in the head. But the way she talked about her husband made it seem like he *might* be dead, and we actually did witness her fall and smack her head into a doorknob once, so no one really knew what to believe. (Also, I’m not trying to imply that abuse would make someone crazy or ‘damaged’ or anything, this is just what was being said. I think they were trying to turn her into a more sympathetic character, because if you feel sorry for her you don’t have to hate her for frustrating your kids so much, and Hate Is A Bad Emotion.)

Also…this woman and Emily Dickinson.

She talked about Emily Dickinson every chance she could get. None of us knew who Emily Dickinson really was before she got there and you could see in her mind it was a capitol offense. She found out the curriculum didn’t have room to cover her (because like, we had a text book), and was way too upset about it. She started reading her poems whenever she found the time (usually somewhere in history class), and always gave us very detailed accounts about her dressing up as Emily and reading her poetry at the library.

Now, two things to note here:

  1. The library did not hire her to do this. She would literally just get in the mood, put on an Emily Dickinson costume that she made by herself, drive to different libraries, and just read poetry out loud to everyone there until someone eventually asked her to leave.
  2. The way she described these events…her tone, the look on her face, her posture…you could just tell that she was getting some sort of sexual gratification out of this? Like dressing up as Emily Dickinson in public and reading her sad poems is really what got this lady’s jollies rocking? Got her all hot and bothered? Which is…a lot, but why would you tell a bunch of seventh graders about it holy shit. What about that sounds like a good idea! What about that turns you back on!

So anyway, we learned a lot about Emily Dickinson against our will.

One of the Davids™ was reading a book for pleasure- which shouldn’t have been a shocker, a lot of kids always had books on them, but Stubel got really interested and asked if she could borrow it from him. He was like ‘sure, after I finish it?’ but she took it that day. He asked her for it back for like five weeks straight.

And…the strudels.

Okay, so the school was trying some dorky thing to promote ~togetherness~ or some virtue or something, I don’t remember the specifics of why, but each class had to make a huge themed poster and hang it on the wall outside the classroom. Which was like, whatever, not the most thrilling project but at least it allowed us to be productive vs just sitting there as the teacher runs about the room rambling about her family vacation from four years ago. Mrs. Stubel decided we needed a quirky nickname and after like three days of deliberation we were christened “Stubel’s Special Strudels”!

(points for alliteration or whatever, but no one actually voted for that and what exactly do strudels have to do with Catholicism? It became a big running joke amongst the kids)

Also, in case you were wondering, she didn’t explain the assignment correctly to us- so every other class had like these beautiful, artistic, well-themed and put together posters, while ours was just…literally a bunch of shit thrown together on paper. Nothing fit with each other, it was literally embarrassing to look at.

But then…she wouldn’t drop the strudel thing. Like she kept bringing it up. She got really into strudels and would just tell us random shit about them. Finally, someone jokes that we should get strudels one day for a party (like instead of a pizza party), and she’s Freaking Out and On Board. She really wants to buy us strudels and have a breakfast party now. She talked about it for like two days straight.

So like… you know in school when you would have a pizza party, usually the teacher would buy it? That’s how they always happened in my experience (not counting the last day of 10th grade when some kid had pizza delivered to the school for lunch but it didn’t get there until math class lol). But especially in grade school? Like if it wasn’t a PTA made party that’s super organized, the school would buy the food, right? Right?

Yeah, so she was like, if this is happening you guys need to give me the money. Just give me the money and then I’ll pick them up on my way to work!! And after some arguing some kids are on board. Strudels should only cost a couple dollars right?

And she’s like, oh no, I’m gonna get them from this high end bakery near my house so it’ll be special, but they’re not cheap and it’ll be a big order! I’m gonna need like fifteen dollars from each of you!

And at this point I’m just like…lady. Come on. 

But she keeps insisting. She’s not gonna go until every student in class pays up.

And I’m like…I’m poor. I don’t even like strudel.  And some of the less-naïve kids are siding with me.

And then she pulls that “you guys are just spoiling all the fun for your classmates” shit, like the naïve kids who already paid up, so it gets to the point where we just gotta cave and give her the money.

(I ended up stealing it out of my Crazy Bitch Aunt’s wallet so it’s whatever, I guess.)

And then of course, shockingly enough, every morning she was met with “where are the strudels?” and every morning she went wide eyed, slapped her forehead and yelled in embarrassed horror “I totally forgot! Tomorrow, guys, I promise!”

Honestly, with how scatterbrained and confused she always was…like to this day I can’t tell you with 100% certainty whether she hustled us or was just actually forgetting about the damn pastries, I choose to lean towards the hustled us side because that’s just the type of people I’m used to, but if I found out it was innocent forgetfulness I wouldn’t exactly be surprised.

She couldn’t handle more than one person talking at a time. Like, we’d have break periods, or group work, or something and all the talking made her go wide-eyed and batty. She’d look overworked and anxious and would be darting around the room trying to do work or something but she couldn’t focus and she’d yell at anyone who tried to talk to her directly. I remember one time she was using this boys desk for something so he asked “where am I supposed to sit?” and she snapped “Sit on the ceiling for all I care!”. And this kid was the Class Clown™ , so he immediately grabbed a chair in one hand and started climbing the bookcase to try and reach the ceiling. She’s standing right next to this and doesn’t even notice. He got all four chair legs planted on the ceiling and was trying to somehow maneuver his way into the chair (I really don’t know what the plan was exactly- he was really tall and it was a small building, so I think he probably had the idea that if he can get his body upside down and in the chair, and stretch out his arms like a hand-stand to hold onto bookcase, he could arguably sit on the ceiling.) but he slipped. Crashed into my desk and the two desks next to me, knocked over the book case, broke the chair in half and hit the desks with enough force to knock them down lower. It was hilarious. Everyone was loosing their shit cracking up (he was fine) and it still took Stubel like five minutes to notice his lying out across the desks right in front of her eyes. She was pissed but how did she miss any of it in the first place? She was barely being helpful in whatever it was she was trying to do.

This was the year the Phillies were going to the World Series, and all the grades were having a Phillies Rally in the cafeteria so a news crew was coming to the school and each class was supposed to come up with fun little cheers for them to broadcast. Multiple cheer ideas were presented to her and she vetoed all of them, someone even suggested just singing the damn eagles theme song with replaced words and calling it a day but she vetoed that too, she was very adamant that she could come up with a cheer all by herself and it’ll be the best one (whoever had the best cheer was winning like an ice cream day or something idk). And then like…literally five minutes before the rally she just hands us signs with the letters and was like ‘we’re just gonna spell out Phillies it will be cute won’t it my strudels???’. We were the weakest class there, predictably. I think we lost to the kindergarteners. There might still be a video online of me yelling “ i “ passionately at the top of my lungs. It was online bc our cheer was so bland the news crew cut it out of the broadcast.

I literally can’t say enough about how she never taught us anything. She’d be going on some tangent about how she doesn’t understand the science behind skiing, and I’d be like “Okay yes but please can you just tell me where Romania is on a map???” And she’d start fights whenever someone actually wanted to learn. It was so easy to get her angry but so hard for her to stay on topic. Kids started teaching the class themselves! Like seriously, she’d be rambling and one of us would just go up to the podium, open the teacher’s guide textbook and just start reading out loud and talking over her. By the time she noticed we’d be halfway through a lesson. And we understood it better than when she tried! You know something’s wrong when pre-teens are more qualified for a job than an adult who supposedly went to school for this.

We were in the church having run-throughs for our upcoming Confirmation and she almost set the church on fire…fifteen different times. In less than half an hour. How hard is it to hold a candle?

Okay, and here’s when stuff starts kicking up. It was October 28th, a Tuesday, and it was our last day of school that week because they were having parent-teacher conferences the rest of the week. So we were just hanging out, watching movies in class and reading (lord knows we weren’t learning), and Stubel calls me over to her desk.

So like, she had given everyone little bags with candy for Halloween, but I get up there and she hands me an extra one. And she’s like “Molly I know your birthday is tomorrow and I bought you a present but I left it on my coffee table this morning by accident! So just have the candy for now!”

And I’m like….”Ma’am I’m like, the sixth birthday this year. You didn’t give anyone else presents?”

And she goes “Oh, I know but this is a special secret surprise. I just know you’re gonna love it! Do you wanna stop by my house later this week to pick it up or should I just give it to you Monday after school?”

And like…In writing this sounds like a non-threatening exchange, and like, it was, but I felt so uncomfortable holy shit. I’m looking over my shoulder and shooting my friends SOS signals. Something about this felt so weird in my gut omfg. I told her thanks and I’d just see her Monday.

So we flash forward to Wednesday- my 13th birthday, the day the Phillies won the world series, and also the day my mother innocently strolled into the school for her meeting only to be met with screaming, the sound of heavy destruction, and the school secretary Mrs. Daily running at her in a panic, waving her arms and yelling “YOUR MEETING IS CANCELLED YOUR MEETING IS CANCELLED GET IN MY OFFICE NOW!”

So my poor mother, who thought she could handle this whole meeting in a few minutes and barely be an hour late for work, is now barricaded in the front office with the school secretary, as the noises from down the hall get louder and louder. The woman explains that they had gotten so many complaints about Mrs. Stubel that this morning, when she got to the school, the principal Sister Patricia called her in and said “Listen, we need you to be professional and still have the parent conferences, but we have to let you go. We just don’t think you fit in well here, and the kids need to come first and feel comfortable in their school.” and like, I’m paraphrasing because I wasn’t there, but we all know she was very polite and professional about it.

Mrs. Stubel, however…was not.

She flipped her chair and stormed out of the office, and locks herself in the seventh grade classroom. She started wrecking the shit out of that place, screaming obscenities and the top of her lungs, they had to call the cops on her! She was locked in there for almost an hour! And let me just give you a nice little list of everything she did in that classroom:

  • Smashed three windows.
  • Threw everything off her desk and carved swear words all over it.
  • Got cleaning fluid that she knew would damage the chalk boards, smeared it all over.
  • Cracked the chalk boards by repeatedly smashing chairs against them.
  • Wrote swear words all over the walls and on desks
  • Went into students desks, ripped up their books.
  • Stole my glasses. (which were in my desk bc I only used them in class at the time)
  • Threw some desks around.
  • Carved swear words into the boards. (there was so much carving I’m assuming she just had a knife on her person, which has to lead to the question, did she have a knife on her while she was in class with us?)
  • Physically ripped the hooks to hang backpacks on out of the wall.
  • Knocked the closet door off it’s hinges.
  • Ripped up all the books in the bookcases and threw their pages all around the room.
  • Wrote lewd phrases inside student’s desks.
  • Broke multiple chairs.
  • Used her podium as a battering ram against the wall that’s in front of where the backpacks go. (the wall won but Damage Was Inflicted)
  • Set a fire in the trash can.
  • When the principal and other teachers started trying to get in, she tossed her rolling chair at the door to scare them off.
  • She was screaming curse words at the top of her lungs the entire time, and cursing the school and the kids and the principal and the church in general, and the school building was small, so all the parents and the smaller children that had to come to the meetings (who were locked in their respective classrooms in fear) heard everything.
  • So much more? But it’s 4:30 in this morning and this list is already long.

So my mom is in the front office and deadass the

entire police force

shows up, running down the hallway to the classroom yelling at her to stop, and it takes a while for them to get her out holy shit. They knocked down the door and she tried to escape out of one of the broken windows! But they got her and dragged her out.

So of course, in such a small school with very involved parents this shit spread like wildfire. The entire town knew within the day. The poor principal called the newly retired old-seventh grade teacher and was like “So we…need some help” and the lady was like “I already heard I’ll be there Monday” omfg. I remember I got a text from one of my classmates saying “if your birthday wish was for us to be set free from the beast I love you” omfg.

So, we eventually go back to school on Monday and everyone’s buzzing. The principal has us go to the cafeteria and she ‘delicately’ explains the situation, and that the old teacher is coming out of retirement for us, the school has a restraining order against Mrs. Stubel now and that she’s sorry we had to deal with this mess. Our classroom had to go under some heavy reconstruction before we could be let back in there, so for like two weeks we alternated between the cafeteria and the preschooler’s classroom, we had no books or anything, just provided loose-leaf paper and pens. It was like, surreal, but everyone was just so happy to be rid of her and to be in the presence of a competent teacher omfg. We eventually were able to get back into our usual classroom.

  1. It took a while for things to go completely back to normal, though. After the big spectacle she made, for weeks after she was fired we were all very scared of the possibility of Mrs. Stubel returning to the school with a gun in hand. It was always a topic we whispered about at lunch with wide eyes and shivers. Like…genuine nightmare scenario.
  2. About two weeks after she was fired, a boy in the back of the classroom gasped loudly during SSR, and when we all looked at him, he whispered in anger “She never gave us our freakin’ strudels!”
  3. About three months after she was fired, we were lined up at the door to go to Library when a few of us looked through the windows and saw something darting through the trees. It was fast and we couldn’t make anything out, so we let it drop. When the class and teacher returned half and hour later, the book she had borrowed months before from one of the boys was sitting on his desk. It was just laying there, the room was silent, nothing had been disturbed…but I have never seen a book look so threatening. People were freaking out. Someone kept insisting that she turned the book into a bomb. No one figure out how she got in the school, and no one could figure out how she got it on the right desk, as we had switched the seating arrangement since she had last been there.  
  4. A full six months after she had left, it was nearing the end of the school year and our class was dicking around during our last computer class. Someone found a website (that we weren’t allowed to be on) that pulls up any police records attached to whoever’s name you enter, so someone decided to search Mrs. Stubel as a joke. We ended up finding out she had like six DUI’s.

Aaaaand that’s the story of the horrendous teacher I had for two months in 7th grade. One of my favorite party stories but tbh she still haunts me™ .

Favorite highlights of live action Beauty and the Beast

• They stuck to the beginning of the original story where Belle asks for a rose and her father gets lost and finds a fire and food in the castle.

• “Mama said not to move because it might be scary. Sorry.”

• Belle called the castle home.

• LEFOU! Everything about him was great. He got character development, he had some fantastic lines, his low key flirting with Gaston, his singing!!! I love my boy.

• Lumiere dabbed. Twice.

• It was beautiful. Oh my god the castle made me absolutely melt and Be Our Guest was breathtaking in live action.

• Lefou booping Gaston on the nose.

• How during the song Adam sings he’s climbing higher and higher so he can still see Belle.

• When Adam found out Belle liked Romeo and Juliet he was like “ew no not that book here have my entire library so you can read something better that that filth”.

• I really like how Gaston in the beginning wasn’t that bad, but as the movie went on he got darker and darker.

• Gaston lifTING LEFOU UP ON ONE ARM

• We finally got an explanation as to why no one remembers the castle and the prince and why the servants were cursed too.

• The guy who can’t remember what he lost in the beginning is Mr. Potts and the minute Mrs. Potts called his name I was shaking my friend next to me because oh my god he “lost” his wife and child.

• ADAM. I’ve loved Adam since forever and he’s still so great in this version AND HIS SONG ABOUT BELLE WAS SO SPECTACULAR I COULD FEEL HIS EMOTIONS.

• Cogsworth & Lumiere are still an old married couple and I love it I love them.

• I know he only had a few lines in Be Our Guest, but Cogsworth’s singing voice was amazing

• Adam’s eye makeup in the beginning that made it look like he was wearing a mask if he stood in the light just so.

• I HAVE BEEN GUSHING ABOUT THE NEW LUMIERE DISIGN SINCE THE FIRST TRAILER CAME OUT AND TO FINALLY, FINALLY SEE IT ON THE BIG SCREEN WAS SO SATISFYING THE LITTLE DETAILS HE HAS LIKE HIS PONYTAIL AND THE FACT THAT HIS COAT MOVES WHEN HE DOES WERE SOOOO GOOD I KNOW I’VE SAID THIS A THOUSAND TIMES BUT I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THIS NEW LUMIERE.

• Lefou has a bite mark from Gaston on his lower stomach and when my friend and I saw it we practically screamed because how exactly do you get a bite mark in that spot if you’re not doing some kinky bedroom stuff.

• The line “there’s a beast on the loose there’s no question, but I fear the wrong monsters released” had me so shook put that on my gravestone I fucking love it.

• It’s sweet and cute and beautiful, but when it gets dark it gets DARK, like, goddamn.

• I loved the detail of whenever a petal falls the castle crumbles further and the servants become more like the objects they are.

• Adam’s beast growl at the end when he’s a human again that, tbh, was really hot.

• The guy who, instead of freaking out when he was put in a dress and makeup, grinned and walked away with his hips swishing and totally owned it.

• That same guy and Lefou dancing together ohhh my god I think I started crying they’re so fucking cute Lefou and his cross dressing boyfriend 5ever.

anonymous asked:

Which Austen book/movie do you think had the most sexual tension?

Persuasion, hands down.

Think about it: every other novel depends wholly upon the uncertainty of the heroine being unaware of the hero’s romantic interest for some portion of the novel, with misunderstandings and difficulties largely brought on by the structure of Proper Courtship where it was generally considered inappropriate for either party to display too much obvious inclination until a proposal was actually made. (Marianne’s quick and clear affection for Willoughby makes a lot of people uncomfortable. Fanny Price is commended for her placid response to Henry Crawford’s flirtations. Elizabeth Bennet doesn’t even begin to remotely consider Darcy as a marital prospect until after he’s proposed and been rejected with some of the sickest burns ever committed to the page.)

But Persuasion. Ah, Persuasion. Anne has already previously accepted and then rejected Wentworth before the novel even starts. The whole book already exists at the level of tension we see reached when Lizzy runs into Darcy unexpectedly on her visit to Pemberley. That’s the whole book.

And it gets better.

Anne didn’t reject Wentworth because she couldn’t fuckin’ stand him, the way Elizabeth chewed off Darcy’s ear for being a dillhole to Jane and (she thinks) to Wickham. Anne loved Wentworth, and he loved her. They were devoted to each other. It’s the fact that she broke off the engagement despite this that rankles, for both of them. The attraction was there. It was acknowledged. It was allowed to burn wild and bright for that brief, delicious time before Lady Russell’s doubts and concerns seized hold of Anne and persuaded her to wreck his happiness, and her own. No, they were both fully aware of how much they wanted each other, and they were like “yeah, let’s get married, it’ll be great, I love you so much, oh God you’re so attractive, you’re amazing, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, you’re everything I could ever want.”

It was real and undeniable. They cannot unsay any of it. And then it was over.

[SAD TROMBONE]

And that’s just the backstory.

So despite Wentworth being hella difficult for Anne to read, and her own shattered expectations and self-esteem leading her to believe that of course he’s over her and totally into Louisa Musgrove, why wouldn’t he be, she’s young and cute and so many things Anne is not…we still get to watch Anne burn for this man after eight years apart and know that that’s a fire that’s never going to go out for the rest of her life, if time and distance and hopelessness and even the attentions of other charming young men in Captain Benwick and Mr. Elliott haven’t managed to put out those flames.

And on the re-read we can pick up on every look and cue from Wentworth which we then know to be signs of the fact that he is as helplessly lost to his desire for this person as he was nearly a decade earlier. He wants to believe otherwise and tries to act as if it is–and in a classic case of over-compensation gives rise to hopes and expectations from Louisa Musgrove which then very nearly lock him into an attachment which would surely divide him from Anne forever. And even when he feels himself safe from that, he confronts the possibility of Anne being taken by a rival in Mr. Elliott, and can only watch, rather than give a clear sign of his intent. After all the time that has passed, he is now in the position Anne was in at the beginning of the book, and must painfully struggle to weigh his own doubts against his desires. The no-liking-each-other-too-much-until-you-pop-the-question courtship rules still apply, and an open and happy flirtation at this point is not in their natures as individuals–they’re older than most other heroes and all other heroines. They know the risks. They’ve seen happiness slip away, before, and wonder if it is lost forever. Their emotional stakes are higher. He cannot bear to ask again, face to face.

The misery. The agony. The helpless and resentful eyefucking. That LETTER.

I͚̞̖ ̗̮͈̰̬͇͙c̺̗̮a̗̗̤̜ṉ̯ ̦͔̞̫̟l̯͎͇i̮̱͓̹̭̝͍̥s͓̣̱͎͉̙̻̱̩t͖̠e̼͍̻̣̼n̪̜̮̟̖ ̼̣̼̱̩n̬̳o̩̱̪̟͚̟̲ ̪̺̺l̗̦o͉̝̺̳̤̺̬̻ͅn̗̤̦̥̥͔g̗̰e̜r͎̙̲͚̥̫͇̰ ̜̻͎͈i̘̻̲̫͖̘̫n̩̳̻̮̳̪ ̖̳̳̬̭s̩i̹̩̗̻̘l̹͚e͈̮͖͚͈̫n͔̣̰̯̝̠̤̝c͚͍̙͈̱͉̗͇e̤̭̯̳̹̳.̘̖̫̩̭̻̤͖̱ ̳̞I͓̞̣ ̦̗̼͙͙͎̗͚m͚͙͖̜̜u͈̱̦̩s͓̰͚͎t̼͕̬͈̗̫ ̝͉͕̯̣͈ͅs͖̼͓̤͎͚̮p̲͇̮͓̩e͍̦̹͉͕̠͎̠a̻͎̝̭̜k͉̫̭̣ ̫̣̲̜͙͉̳t̺͚͔̜̗o̫͓̩̝ ̯̻̙̱y͕̳̘̺͎̞o͍̮u̲̭̙̦ ̺̦͎̬̦̣̤

b̩̹͖y̦̝͙̣̮̦̫ ̼̪s̜̜̼͓̝̣͉̺ṵ̼̦̪c͕̝̝h̝̞͈̻̺̩̼̬̩ ͕̺̟͓ͅm͖͈̣̰͍̫̦e̫͕͇̗̳̩̣̠a̬͕̭͕ͅn̖ͅs̲͕͉̙̥͉̠͙ͅ ̤̳̞̖̼̥̰a̗̗̹̰̳̟̙s̭̭͍̦͎͙ͅ ͇̭̰a̱̩͈r͍̦̟̣͚͙̱e̠̟̬̮ ̘w͔̩͈̩̠̮̭̘i̳̻̯͙̦̼t͇̖̹̙̩h͎̣͎̖̩̬̥̪̦i̙n͚̫͈̗̘ ̱̺m̯̜̬͈y̹̟̝̱̼̝̰̘ ̖̞̪̪̦̭r̮̝̙̻̣̯e̳̮̦͚̞̣a̱̞c̠̞̝͎̥̯͚͍ḥ͎̟̯.͎̪̬̟̻̥͉̦͙
̭̭͕̲̫̖̜
͙̰̬͓̪̹͈ͅY̰̯̟̜͎̼̳͖̱o̘̜̞̣̭̥u̩͎̰̣̤̻͚͙ ̫̲̻̲̜͈p̱̹̯i͎e͈̣̩̠̲̖r̳͉̺c̩͔͉̩̤̥͉̲e͎̗ ̞̠̮̲̝̠̤̜m̯̙̹̖̗̺y̤̺͙̼̮ ̮s͇͔͔̦̮̤o̯͖̥̭͓͍̤ͅu͔̥̩̯̻̖̙̲l̟͎.̤͕ ̰̼̘I̭̝̫ ͚̠̝̜a̮̮̘m̝̖͖̫͙͖̟ ͔̳̯̟̺h̗͖̩̬̟̱͓a̺̳͔̲͈l̙̺̙͓̞f͍̠ ̠̞̘̮̩a̲̝̬̟g̪͖̲͙o̩͚n̩̞̹y̗̖͔̪̮͚̹̻,̖̩̬̗̣͇̺̹ ̥̙͇̜͓̙̠̰͎h͕̮̪͕ạ͙̰̠͓l͚͙͚̤͇̮f͉̰̝͈̳͍̖ ̭̘ḥ̞o̗̲͎̩̜̙p̭e͖̮̼̱ͅ.̻̳ ̙̣͍͍̦̩̼͓̯

T̻̣̖̼͍͉̝e̳̮̯̘̜͖l̪̰l͕͕ ̼͈͉̻̙̗̰̬m̟̬̙̫ͅḙ̬̰̲̦̮̜ ̣̲̘n̺̰̦̟͍͔̫o͙̬͓̗̫̻̻̱t̻̘̰̜̖̦̜͈ ͖͇̜͚̣͍t̳̞̼h̗̹͓̮̖̲̟͕a̫̞̖̣̳̩ͅt͈͚̩ ̝̤̗̲̭̫̭I̪͙͙ͅ ̝̜̭͚̙̞a͉̹͖̫͔̪̮m̯̘͇̪ͅ ̳͍̩t̠͈̻͚̩͇͚o̩̭o̘̦̝̙ ̰̬̠͓̠͚̙̹̹l͚͕͍a̰͎t̖̭̥ẹ͈̝,̩̲͓̖̘͇͎ ̻̲̬̲ț͔͎̹̪͍h̘͔̙̝a͇t̫͎͙͖ ̬̩͇̫̮s͖͉̘̙u͔̹͚c͕̣̝͙͍h͖̤̲̱̟ͅ ̖̺͔̠̰̬p͈̤͔̖̯ṛe͚͙̯̖c̝͔͙͉i̻o̖͙̠u̜̬̦̹̻̫ͅș̝̪̹̝̦̩̼ͅ ̦̥͉̞͉͚̗f͇̪e̝̰̠̝ẹ̹͔͉̟̤l̻͖͔̜͇̝ͅi̟̘͎̦͈̞̱n̲̮̤̤͉͈̬g̱͓͖͕̣̯͚͙s̱ ̩̯̲̪͕̩a̪̠͓͈̩ͅr͓͚e͍͇͖ ̹g̳̖͎͙͉͇͎̯o͓n̘̜͈̫e̲̥̥̞͖̩ͅ ̭̺f͓̺̮͈͚̼̲o̼̝r͖̰̩̞̺̼̮̰̪ ̗̮e̼̬̹̳͕̼̤v̲̝e͙̤͎ṟ̙̘̱.͕̞̥͙̝
̘̭̪͙̙̥̲̗
̰̺̮̗̳̭̹I̺̼͎͕ ̳̖̘͇͚̦̳͉o̞̥̥̞̘̗̗f̜̱̞͔͕̹͙f̟̹̖̺e̲̬͉̥r̲͚̣̘̪͓̫̳̹ ̙͚͍̘͍̘̦m̪̫͔̼̙͔̯͕y͎̖̯͇s̞e̺̣͓̻̗͎̹͇̻l̙̣̮͈f͖̩̫̱̤͙̘ ̝̩̥͖̞̜͉̻͎t͇̳͈̳o̙̜̳͎̣ ͕̤̣y̱̞̦͈̳̥o͚u̦̭̥͔ ͈̹̗̮a̠̺͓͕͖g̤͇̟͍a͚̱͉̯̬͍̘i͚̣̣̻̥n̞͍̜̗̝͓ ̤̠̹̪̳͉̪͓w̼̭̠̭̝i͖̭t͎͕̮̭ẖ̟̱ ͉̩a̗͇̪ͅ ̩̥̺̱̱̦h̺̝͕͓̠e͈̜̮̪a͚̦̦͇͔̗͙̝͈r͖͔̜̠̰̥t̬̥̻̭͕̬ ̦͇̠͎̱͓͎e̥̙̠̥̼̩͎̘͍v̩͙e͎̭̺̫̥n͍͚̙̺̼ ̘̰̱m̗̲̯̞͇o̝͈͓̰͇r̹̤̞̙͕e͙͍̦̦̦ͅ ̱͔͇̩͓y̻̖͚̱̼ͅo̜̯̗u̦̲̦͎̙̬̭r̼̲̗̟̯̟̱͓ ̗͖o̜͍̤̩͓̲̬ͅw͈̳͎̩̪̤͓͍͎n͖͍͈͔̪͖͔ ͇̳͔̫̮͙̭͕

t̤͕h̲̲̩̱a̪͚͚̞͈͈͉ͅṇ̝̪̞̰̦͎ ͍̺̼̳̦̜w̝̹̖h͉̥̟̝e̮̞͇͕̩͉̰̮n̘͓̜͙ ̙ͅy͕̗͇͎͙͉̹̻o̖͈͈ͅu̺̱͈ ̮̥͍͍͓a̝̮̱l̥̩̤̹m͖̻o̻͚̯s͚͎̳̻͙t̟̹ ̱̹̤̝̞ͅb̰͍̺̜ͅr̤̙͍̹̯͎̻o̥͚͇̻k̹e̟͍̪͎͖ ̱̝̭̥̠i̠̝̬̙̲̤t͇͚̺̯̣̮̜͚ͅ,̙̣̭͓̭̮ͅ ̗̰̞̳͕͔e̦̱̹i̺̙̰͕̲͓̜ͅg̖̯͈͇͔̣h̻̻̺̼͉͍͇̞t̠̝̦̮̟͈ ̤̩̦̻̥y͕̼e̺͉͖a̭r͎̜̻̯͖s̺ ̰͔a͚̗̰̞̺̣n͕̳̜̲̰̱̮ͅd̮ ̲̳͉̙̲̙a͖̞͕͍̗ ̝̲͖̖h͈͈̮͉̯̱̪a̺̖̼̘̯̳͕̼̩ḻ͚̩̰̪̻̞͙f̺̫̻̬͓̩͇̜ ̖̮a͎̯̣͍̻̲̺g̞͖̹̭̻͓̻̥ͅo̺̲̯͔̪̹͖̭.̭͓̮̖
̞̞̜̩̮̖
͚͍̮̟D̹̺̺͚͎͈a̱̫͕͕̩̞r̭̟̖̤͍̘e̫̞̞͉̖̮̳̣ ̼̱̜ͅn͙o͇̮̰̫̠̺t͕̱̜͎ ̟͕̩̼̙s̹a͖͉y͓̣ ͕̩̠̗t̟͈͍͚h͕͕͖̣̟a̤̹̯̗̪͕t̮̳͓ ͎̳̰̳̙̹͙ṃ̟͕̟ͅa̪̩n̥̲͇̺̞̖̰̫ ̫̖̯̜̼͖͖̼f̟̮̪̖̞o̯͉̝͚r̺̭̞͕g͕̹̤̖̣̤e͖̦̜̘t̺̮s̳̯̳̻̘̟ͅ ̻̜̻̱͉s͍͙̟͇̜̦̬͍o̬̪͔̟o̖̠̺͙̺̯̘͙n̼̫̥̮̬̜̞͖e̤̹͇͇̼r̬̻̰̻̻̹ͅͅ ͇̠ṭ̪̰͈̪̥͙̫h̫͕̙̞̟͍͖̺a̬̭̼̲n̹͙̮̹͚̘̞ ̜̺̤̪w͇̦͖̦͕ͅo̫̪̦͎̜̭m̜͕̹a͉͚̮̫n̪̥̣͖,̠̣ͅ ̺̺̪̠̮̘̮ͅͅ

t̫̳͎͙͎̩̹͕h̙̬̦̟̣̝̜̹a̟̠̖͍̜t̘̣͉͍̤̦̮ ͔̲̹̤̤̝̮͔̠h͖̲̲̣i̜̲͈ͅs̝̠̪̭̝̭̳ ̪̤͓̗̣̩̺l͔̺̱̼͇͕̩o͖̠͖͖v͓̫̤̲̬̳̳͔e̟̮͖̩̲̯̻ ̹͕h̼͚̠̘̺̖a̯̰s͍̹̠͔̠ͅ ̟͈̞̩̳͉̮ͅa͔̺̹̟̼̲̝̦n̳̖͕ ̣̗͍͎͇e͓͉̦̺ͅa͔̰r̠̺͖̝̗̼̼̘l̻̘͕̤̯̩̟̙i͔͚͙̠͓̥ẹ̯͙̼͙ͅr̲͈͉ ̣ḏ̲̯̟̪͇e̳͓̫̲̻͚a̯t̲̭̬̻̯̥̼̭h̠̘.͍̰ ͚͍

Ị̱̻ ̙̭͇̗̟̠͓̠h̲̳͎a͍̠̤̗̠̰̝v̙̘̖̼͖e̞̻̟̹̣̣̭ ̠̱͍̯͈l̹͇̗̣̙͈͈̩̰o͎̭̝v͈͕e̠̳̗͓͍̺ḓ͍͔̯̖̹̼ ̹̼̳͙̗̘̬n̳͕̰̻̲̰̖͉o̬͉n͚̭ͅe͚̮̯ ̺̺b̥̬̩̼̣͈̻̺͖u̫͖͖̦̪̜̠̱t̲̤͓̩ͅ ̙̮̣̜y͚͎̘̭̤̼̞̞o͔̩̭u̖̩͍̫̤͖.̠̬̞̰͍

Originally posted by kickinyoass

Vampire Times
MBMBaM episode 348
Vampire Times

Transcript:

Griffin: I have a very related Yahoo that I'm— I would be delighted if you would all let me read.
Justin: Okay.
Griffin: It was sent in by Amelia Berger, thank you Amelia, it’s by Yahoo Answers user Dirk, and it’s a similar vein of like, “How did folks get in touch without phones,” right? But the wording of this question is… maybe the best.
Griffin: Dirk asks, “How did people know when to meet back in vampire times?”
[All three brothers laughing]
Griffin: “I know tha—”
[Brothers continue to laugh]
Griffin: “I know that they wrote more letters—”
[Laughter]
Griffin: You gotta let me get through it!
Griffin: "I know that they wrote more letters and stuff, but back in vampire times, how did you make plans with friends?”
[Brothers still laughing as he reads]
Griffin: “Did they just wait around all day and hope that they ran into each other?”
Travis: Oh god…
Justin: [Laughing]
Travis: Oh god, what is wrong with our schools?
Justin: You can make all the plans you want, the vampires are gonna ruin them. I mean you could write them a letter and it’s like “Meet me at Ye Olde Arby’s this afternoon” but a vampire is just gonna be waiting there to harangue you!

Dear rest of the Spn Fandom,

What Destiel is NOT about.

1. Hating Sam/Jared
Okay, I have no idea where this one started, but honestly I don’t care what you ship if you hate on either of my tol cinnamon roll babies, YOU WILL BE FACING MY WRATH. ALL 5'2 OF IT.

2. Hating the women that they were with.
Personally, I love Jo and Lisa. Cassie was just there for an episode, so I don’t really have any opinions on here.
I don’t like Meg for other reasons (her character inconsistency was annoying and her voice got on all my nerves) but hating her just because she kissed Cas is pretty shallow.

3. Two hot men kissing.
Right. This. Look, if the only reason that you ship them is that it would be hot to see them kiss, I’d just like to tell you that YER A FUCKBUTT, HARRY. Other people can probably explain this better, but you’re fetishising a whole community and you need to stop. Now. And get off my blog while you’re at it.

4. Hating on their wives.
This is probably more of a Cockles thing than a Destiel one, but most of the Cockles shippers that I’ve encountered were all awesome people, so I’ll say it on their behalf, we don’t hate Danneel and Vicki, okay? Seriously, why would anybody, when they make Misha and Jensen so happy?

5. Making everything gay/The gay agenda
No. No. Say it with me, no. We do not ship them because they’re both men
We ship them because they have amazing chemistry and it makes sense that Dean and Cas be together. And it would obviously be the bisexual agenda, if it was an agenda. Which it’s not. At all. *Cackles in the distance*

• What Destiel is about

1. Unconditional Love
2. Dean finally realizing that he's​ not damaged and deserves love. Also realizimg that he’s not the perfect manly man soldier that John raised him to be, and that’s okay.
3. Cas understanding that he will always have a home with Dean (and Sam, by extension)
4. Two people who help each other to be better people.
5. Two people who constantly screw up, but forgive each other, because that’s what love is about.
6. Seeing people at their worst, and still loving them. (Dean forgiving Cas after he becomes God and Cas telling him that he deserves to be saved)
7. Unconditional love (I’m sorry, I’ll never be over the “I’d rather have you, cursed or not.”)
8. Both of them, giving up so much for each other.
9. Sticking up for each other

• Obviously I can’t speak for the entire fandom, but these are my views, and generally the views of people that I’ve encountered. Thanks for taking the time out to read it!

Sincerely,
A Destiheller

Show Off (m)

“Say, where do you get all your money from?” you inquire.

Hoseok stops himself for a second, reluctant to reply. “I-I have another job…”

“What kind of job?”

“Something interesting—different. Don’t worry about it.”

Synopsis: You always wondered how your roommate made a ton of money out of the blue; you never expected that it was because he’s a prominent camboy.

[cr.]

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader // camboy!hoseok + room mate!au

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 7k

Includes: masturbation, dirty talk, orgasm denial, sub hoseok

A/N: julia and i roamed on one of sam’s blogs and ran into a certain vid… then this spiraled out *intense sweating intensifies*

Sub!BTS Collab


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Pour yourself some mead and get ready for the wildest ride of your life.

Seaside Lessons

“Those are called Ironshell Crabs. I’ve read that cooking them into dishes can strengthen the body’s durability!”

“Is that so? Hylians certainly are a resourceful bunch. Still, I’d rather have my hardiness built in; not many enemies will let you take a snack break before battle, Princess.”

Holy crap there’s like 2k of you dorks following me now! Hope you like Zelda and Urbosa, cuz to celebrate after the cut I have both of these seperated into transparent stand alone images~ (Well, Urbosa’s alone - Zelda’s having a nice convo with the crab~). Love ya’ll!

PS: I love these designs but MY GOD SO MANY DETAILS EVERYWHERE!

Edit: Going to edit the backround colors later today probably~ keep looking at it and its just a bit off from what I want~ Done! more blue now to balance things out~

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6

I’m practically taking an expression screencap from every episode lately to use in chats because they convey more than I ever could express with words

@yuurier and I were talking so here’s some #highlights 

  • After the banquet Victor locks himself in the (Chris’) bathroom, downs a bottle of champagne, and cries while Chris threatens to break down the door. 

  • “I met my husbannnnnnd” “No, you drank 3 glasses of sex on the beach, told Yakov to plan the wedding, and then threw up on my Oxfords. Get out of the bathroom Vitya i need to take a shower.” 

  • Post “Victor is in love and he’s kind of freaking out” cuddles were Chris assures Victor that yes Yuuri loves poodles (He has a poodle actually which makes Victor cry more because he’ll be a good Papa to Makkachin then) no Yuuri won’t leave him if he loses his hair, and yes you should go to sleep so you don’t meet him with dark circles. 

  • When Victor knocks on Yuuris door in an Armani suit, bouquet of roses, and reservations for his favorite high class restaurant in Sochi he just stares at the maid cleaning it for 20 mins before calling Chris for emergency drinks. 

  • Phichit welcoming Yuuri back and ragging on him for 20 mins because Yuuri looks like shit (Can you imagine a hangover on a plane…) and he still has a sharpie phone number (smeared from his shower) on his chest. 

  • Yuuri expects Victor to be the god of flirting, romance, and pick up lines but nope the dude has literally learned all his dating skills from trashy romance novels. He still reads them, especially the gay ones, and pens to his favorite authors under a fake name. 

  • Victor literally buys “100 best pick up lines” at the airport on his way to Japan and has told Yuuri ALL of them by the end of the summer. 

  • After they start dating Yuuri loves them. He knows they’re bad, he knows Victor is LOVING how well they work, but god he just looks so happy whenever one “lands”.

  • When Yuuri dishes it back though Victor lays on the couch with a pillow covering his face asking God how many times you can fall in love. Yuuri keeps dropping them as Victor begs for his heart’s mercy. 

  • Y’know that thing where big dogs get excited and they slide around because it’s just 100 lbs of love heading for you? Literally Victor when he decides it’s cuddle Yuuri time. 

  • The amount of times Makkachin and Victor fight for Yuuri’s lap is every day. Yuuri loves it and has so many videos of Victor and Makkachin nose to nose “arguing” (aka Victor in Russian telling Makkachin in detail that is HIS fiance and Makkachin boofing and licking his nose) over whose turn it is to cuddle Yuuri. It usually ends with Yuuri sandwiched between Victor’s chest and a 100 lb dog (Who thinks he’s 10 lbs) asleep on his lap. It works. 
Ignore This Text

Summary: Sam somehow gets a favor out of Bucky, resulting in a very awkward confrontation with a local barista.
Pairing: Bucky x reader
Characters: Female Reader, Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers
Word Count: 1,980

| Feedback is very much appreciated | Masterlist |

Every Sunday morning, at precisely 8:45, Bucky finds himself at a quaint, little cafe just a block away from the Brooklyn apartment himself, Steve, and Sam, who he finds utterly unbearable, live together. Like clockwork, he’ll wake up, argue with Sam about him eating the rest of whatever food Bucky was attempting to have for breakfast, Steve offering to go grocery shopping the umpteenth time that week, and with Bucky frustratingly storming out of the apartment subconsciously heading towards the cafe with the best muffins and no with Sam Wilson in sight.

Just like all the weeks before, Bucky’s feet hurriedly carry himself down the empty morning sidewalk as he groans in annoyance. This Sunday Sam had decided to finish off the carton of egg whites, that clearly had a bright blue sticky-note with Bucky’s name on it, and to use up all the hot water in the apartment. It seemed as if this man’s purpose on Earth was to make Bucky Barnes’ life more difficult than it had to be.

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Have you ever came so close to Actually killing yourself, that you felt a sense of amazement. Amazed that you are living your last day, your last hour…your last minutes.
So you stand there, and look around observing your surroundings, saying to yourself “this is the last thing I’m gunna see” and then you start praying to God or who ever you believe in. Asking them to please make sure you make it home. But your attempted suicide somehow failed.
Now look around where ever you are, and who ever you are.
Look around and say to yourself “I’m still here” if your reading this, your still here…
Live life like theirs no tomorrow, but also, prepare yourself for a long future. Because you never know when you are truly going to die.
Mouth o’ Mine

Harry X Reader: Angst, smut

In which Harry’s no good with his words but he sure is good with his mouth.

Request? Yes:

some harry face sitting action maybe?

Author’s note: This is a continuation of “Mess o’ Mine.” I would suggest reading that first, if you haven’t already. I thought this was gonna be the end but then I fucked up so… there’s also a part 3. Hope you enjoy! I did!

Part 1: Mess o’ Mine // Part 3: Mind o’ Mine


You’ve been running through the events that have occurred, confused at the escalation and the outcome. No issues have been resolved, and there wasn’t really a conversation or discussion. You don’t know any more than you did when you heard Harry singing your poems. Has he used your writing in more songs on his album?  Has he read your whole journal? God, you hope not. One poem is bad enough.

Harry hasn’t been around, hasn’t tried calling for the two weeks since he showed up on your doorstep. You’ve flipped the channel whenever he shows up on your television and scrolled at record speed when he’s popped up on your social media feeds. Maybe you should feel relieved and cleansed of his toxicity, but you don’t. Instead, you feel a little broken, like your stomach is splintering into pieces, and your mind still feels split open. Not only that, but you can smell him, feel the weight of him on top of you, taste the foreign flavor of his mouth. This isn’t what you need.

A whole other wave of confusion has rolled over you in terms of your relationship with Harry, if there still is one. The two of you have crossed a line without any prior thought or contemplation. Years upon years of friendship have been threatened, and you’re not even sure how it happened. Why did he kiss you? How did the two of you end up in bed, naked between the sheets? If you were confused about it before, trying to figure things out has only worsened your introspection.

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like real people do p.2 | jungkook

summary: the feelings for your friends with benefits are changing. months pass, and you feel your gut telling you that you want more. you’re just not sure if he feels the same.

college student!reader, friends with benefits!jungkook

piece 1, piece 2, piece 3

this component is based off russ’s cherry hill

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anonymous asked:

Heyy! Do you know any angsty (with a happy end) where yuuri or victor get a concussion(or something) and they have something like short termed memory loss?

Thanks for the requests! These are only going to be temporary amnesia fics as the idea of Victor/Yuuri not remembering each other permanently makes me really sad 😭 Enjoy!


Victor/Yuuri Has Temporary Amnesia 


hold me in your arms tonight by isonala, Gen, 702 words
After surgery, Victor wakes up with temporary amnesia and forgets he’s married to Yuuri. Quick read, and the fluffiest of fluff. Must read!

lovesick by Ironinkpen, Teen, 2.7k
“Did the doctor send you?” When Yuuri doesn’t reply fast enough, since he’s still gaping like a fish, he turns to Yuri. “Did the doctor send him? Because wow,” He drops his arm and presses his hand to his chest like the dramatic bastard he is. “You’ve got to be the prettiest man I’ve ever seen.”
“Oh my god,” Yuri groans. “Is he hitting on you?” OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS FIC

he meets me where i am by rire, Teen, 4.6k
In which Yuuri gets into an accident that wipes his memory of everything that happened after his first Grand Prix, Yurio and Victor help him retrace his journey, and Yuuri rediscovers himself along the way.

Pleasant is the Memory of Past Troubles by TheSecretUchiha, Gen, 4.1k
Yuuri falls and he hits his head. He hits his head hard and all his memories of the past year fall out and slip away on the ice. (Happy ending don’t worry!!!)

Perfect Match by Brittanica2015, Gen, 620 words
Yuuri and Victor just got out of surgery and don’t remember each other. “That’s Victor, your husband.” “What! Really?” “Really.” Phichit nodded, capturing everything with his phone. “Are you sure?” “Definitely.” I LOVE THIS HAHAHA

Amnesia by cerisebio, Gen, 12k
Victor wakes up in a hospital room. At his bedside is a Japanese skater he came across at the Sochi Grand Prix Final. Angst with a happy ending!

The Fundamentals of Caring by braveten, Explicit, 20k
One of my favourite hurt/comfort fics! Yuuri comes down with a nasty cold and Victor tries to take care of him the best that he can. Full of hilariously delusional Yuuri, caring Victor, and ALL THE FLUFF! So cute, definitely recommend!

My Kind of Love by thatoldeblackmagic, Gen, 723 words
The sappy post-op fic where victor falls in love with his husband… again. SO cute!

Fall hard (on your head) by I_hate_usernames, Gen, 10k
Takes place in episode five. Instead of getting a bloody nose after attempting the triple flip, Yuuri hits his head and gets a concussion. Love confessions, delusional Yuuri, and mutual comfort. Thumbs up!

Back to Step One by soomin, Gen, 2.6k
Viktor loses his memory, and Yuuri is reminded why he fell in love him in the first place. Not temporary amnesia, but it is a happy ending!

Together Dancing, Cheek to Cheek by ambientwhispers, Gen, 2.1k
Katsuki Yuuri sometimes still doesn’t believe he could possibly be married to his old idol, Victor Nikiforov. One day, Victor decides to show Yuuri exactly where that road began, with the pictures from the 2015 GPF banquet. Drunken amnesia fic, Victor embarrasses Yuuri RIP

Check out this adorable amnesia AU written by @skygemspeaks here on tumblr!