aquarius theater

The Signs as MST3K Quotes

Aries: “I wanna decide who lives and who dies.”

Taurus: “Well believe me, Mike, I calculated the odds of this succeeding versus the odds I was doing something incredibly stupid… and I went ahead anyway.”

Cancer: “They’re like Klingons but without the Kling.”

Gemini: “Honey bunches…OF DEATH!”

Leo: “Sorry I’m late, my sleeves fell off.”

Virgo: “Oh, terrific — we were saved by the gates of hell.”

Libra: “C'mon! Try and move faster than the plot!”

Scorpio: “Sir, do you have any idea how fast you were dying?”

Saggitarius: “Ayoo, aayyyyooo, Director’s gone and they wanna go home!”

Capricorn: “My theory is that the director shot the entire movie without looking at it.”

Aquarius: “Forget about life-jackets this is The 50’s.”

Pisces: “This is the song written for the train chase.This is the chase, Rocky and Ken! He tried to kill me with a forklift…Olé!”

Signs as moments in Hamilton

Aries: When Alexander sings a reprise of all the songs before the bullet reaches him.

Taurus: “and Peggy”  

Gemini: When Angelica sings, “I’m not here for you” in the Reynolds Pamphlet and puts Alexander in his freaking place

Cancer: The key change in Say No To This when Mariah sings, “if you pay you can stay”

Leo: The reprise of Stay Alive when Eliza sings, “did you know?” and my heart literally breaks


Libra: “Call me son oNE MORE TIME” 

Scorpio: The first Cabinent Battle when Alexander offers to show everyone where his shoe fits 

Sagittarius: “at least I keep his eyes in my life” *audience sobs* 

Capricorn: When Washington tells Burr to close the door on his way out

Aquarius: “Hamilton wrote the REMAINING FIFTY ONE” 

Pisces: After the wedding when Alexander’s bros are giving him a hard time while drunk out of their minds 

The signs as things my theatre teacher has said

Aries: “I don’t want you to be have hard times. I want you to happy!”

Taurus: “Magic green things- BYEEEE”

Gemini: “Idk just hit it with the broom I guess”

Cancer: “I think I’m falling in love with Ed Sheeran?”

Leo: “Join theatre! Just look at all the girls you can kiss!!” *motions to my whole class*


Libra: *gets a call from the front office from teachers asking us to be quiet* “can you just, like, tell them to suck it?”

Scorpio: “YoURe aLL mAGIcaL UniCOrNS”

Sagittarius: “I swear to god if I don’t find this sequined wrap in under one minute I will burn this theatre down”


Aquarius: *pile of over 60 wall clocks on the floor* “…they were there when I got here”

Pisces: “I’m gonna help you steal this mini fridge, okay?”

The Signs as Stereotypical Theatre People

ARIES: The one person who yells at people for being in their way or doing things that screw them over. Probably pretty cutthroat when it comes to getting their way, would be the one person to actually survive in show business.
TAURUS: Assistant stage manager who wants to be in charge, but isn’t. Probably bitter that they never got cast in anything, and will hold onto that fact until they die. Would make a kick ass director.
GEMINI: The one who never shuts up backstage and in rehearsal, yet somehow never gets yelled at. Also, has the most energy of anyone, and is somehow never tired.
CANCER: The one who falls in love with their character in every way possible. The most upset when the show is over, and will remember it for the rest of their life. Loves every play or musical they ever see.
LEO: The supporting actor who can’t stand being out of the spotlight, and tries to be the star of the show anyways. Has been acting since they were 3, knows that they’re good, and flaunts it.
VIRGO: Techie who gets no recognition but is pretty much the glue of the entire show. Fixes literally every set piece and organizes backstage.
LIBRA: Hardcore method actor, takes on the persona of their character outside of rehearsal. It pays off in the end though, because every time they go on stage they do perfectly.
SCORPIO: The one who is phenomenal in dramatic roles, because they know perfectly how to translate their own struggles into a character. (#mylifegoals)
SAGGITTARIUS: The one who isn’t even technically in the production, yet is somehow always there doing stuff (she doesn’t even go here…) Probably promoting the show and handing out flyers to random strangers
CAPRICORN: The director who wants perfection and nothing less. Will replace you just as soon as they will put you on their stage. That’s show business, bitch.
AQUARIUS: the person who is just naturally a good actor without even trying at all. Makes it look easy, has a super laid back acting style. Also the one person who is never stressed out during tech or show week.
PISCES: The actor who has to analyze every last thing and look for the meaning behind every line and every motivation. (which is actually something you should do, take notes people) Knows every single show on the face of the earth.

The Signs as Songs from Heathers: The Musical
  • Aries: Meant to be Yours
  • Taurus: Freeze Your Brain
  • Gemini: Big Fun
  • Cancer: Kindergarten Boyfriend
  • Leo: Candy Store
  • Virgo: Our Love is God
  • Libra: Shine a Light
  • Scorpio: Dead Girl Walking
  • Sagittarius: Blue
  • Capricorn: Beautiful
  • Aquarius: My Dead Gay Son
  • Pisces: Fight for Me
The Signs as BoM fandom things

Aries- Kevin’s Minion Kink

Taurus- Nic Rouleau Rhymes

Gemini- “I am disgusted, I’m revolted. I dedicated my entire life to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and this is the thanks I get?”

Cancer- Every dinner needs a sidekick

Leo- Connor trying to kiss Kevin during the transfer scene

Virgo- ChurchTarts

Libra- Avenue Q Parallels

Scorpio- *Shouts into the night* GAYYYYYY MORMOOOOOOONS

Sagittarius- “More to the point, why do you let bad things happen to me?”

Capricorn- Singing every part of Hello! by yourself

Aquarius- The Daddy’s Boy Video

Pisces- The Bee of Mormon

The Signs At The Movies
  • Aries: *sits straight faced through the entire production. All movies are critiqued later as, "okay"*
  • Taurus: *Vocally guesses what's about to happen, every time there's a plot twist*
  • Gemini: *stares wide eyed at the screen, occasionally asking a question or taking a sip of soda*
  • Cancer: *is impressed by everything that happens. Even if its a b-rated movie*
  • Leo: *doesnt know why they came/feels out of place. Realizes later that they had a good time*
  • Virgo: *makes comments periodically, between spilling things and having to pee*
  • Libra: *softly mutters things like:* oh no!.. Oh my gosh... How the fuck?.. Run!.. Aww..
  • Scorpio: *usually ends up not liking the movie, getting hung up on one element or another. Still has a good time*
  • Sagittarius: *laughs and boo's the loudest. Sometimes throws popcorn at the screen. Usually loves the movie*
  • Capricorn: *can't decide whether they like the movie or not, but gets emotionally attached to some elements. Misses part of it to refill the popcorn bucket*
  • Aquarius: *eats all the popcorn and speaks at inopportune times*
  • Pisces: *gets overly, emotionally invested in the characters*
The Signs as BoM Characters (My version)

Aries- Giant Dancing Coffee Cups

Taurus- Elder Price

Gemini- Gotswanna

Cancer- General Butt-Effing Naked

Leo- Elder Cunningham

Virgo- Elder McKinley

Libra- Mafala Hatimbi

Scorpio- Lucifer (he’s spookier)

Sagittarius- Kalimba

Capricorn- Elder Poptarts

Aquarius- Elder Ghali

Pisces- Sister Kimbay

the signs as songs from legally blonde: the musical
  • aries: Whipped Into Shape
  • taurus: Serious
  • gemini: There! Right there!
  • cancer: Legally Blonde remix
  • leo: So Much Better
  • virgo: Ohmigod You Guys
  • libra: Find My Way/Finale
  • scorpio: Blood In The Water
  • sagittarius: Ireland
  • capricorn: What You Want
  • aquarius: Bend and Snap
  • pisces: Chip On Your Shoulder

Aries: the one that brings up inside jokes according to movie scenes and feels awful and ashamed when squad is too loud.

Taurus: they aren’t even in the movie, they’re at the snack bar

Gemini: critiquing the movie and trying to keep their voice down but is a bit too loud anyway

Cancer: either loving the movie or falling asleep to how boring it is no inbetween

Leo: the one nodding their head at important empowering scenes

Virgo: simply watches the movie not caring about what else is going on but is low key aggravated when everyone is talking 

Libra: saying “yes!” when their favorite character does something heroic

Scorpio: Telling everyone to shut the f*ck up, because their actualy watching the movie

Sagittarius: loudly making unecesary comments and making sure the entire movie theater hears it 

Capricorn: the one who bought all of squad’s tickets 

Aquarius: laugh at the movie because everything about any movie is funny to them

Pisces: Invites everyone to the movie but doesnt pay

what the signs remind me of

aries: fire burning passionately ~ adrenaline rushes ~ chrome cars

taurus: the evening sky ~ a dewy morning ~ philosophy

gemini: computers from the 90s ~ flip phones ~ a fresh haircut

cancer: soft, white sand ~ silver paint on a blank canvas ~ tattoos

leo: the sistine chapel ~ ancient greece ~ rome

virgo: wearing your nicest clothes ~ brushing soft hair ~ your favorite perfume

libra: sunsets ~ gold body piercings ~ laying on the beach

scorpio: midnight ~ dark eyeshadow ~ expensive lingerie

sagittarius: drinking with friends ~ dark forests ~ fawns

capricorn: red lipstick ~ walking the streets at night ~ writing your first story

aquarius: old movie theaters ~ crooked teeth ~ riding roller coasters

pisces: your first high ~ swimming deep ~ your favorite dream