I’ve been thinking about it a lot and honestly. I’m so over anakin eating live bugs. like, how have we let it get this far… it’s literally not even funny….. april fools I’m gonna be talking about anakin gobbling up worms till the day I die and then when I die and worms begin decomposing my corpse anakin’s force ghost is gonna come and slurp up THOSE worms for lunch
Samwell Women’s Volleyball Sisterhood Traditions that have been around for Millions Of Years (about three)
Wet High Fives
“ew Kelsey that’s disgusting I’m not gonna lick my hand before i high five you, you fucking gremlin”
this tradition began April and March’s freshman year, when they were revving up for a really intense game and the captain, a senior at the time named Tina, had a weird pre-game ritual where she would lick one hand, and another teammate had a ritual where she would high five everyone. this game happened to be the only one that they won that season, and when April and March told this to Kelsey she was The Way She Is and now she bullies someone into a disgusting and sticky high five before every game.
usually it’s Bailey or Caitlin who end up being the victims
Double Date Policy
there’s a chart in April and March’s dorm that reads “DDP” in bright blue glitter, and it’s Very Important.
on the chart there is a section for all the “Registered Couples” of the team (i.e Bailey and Kelsey, Chris and Caitlin, Sara and a very heavily whited out spot that currently reads “Jason”, “April and March FOR EMERGENCIES ONLY”, ect ect). The other columns are for each member of the team, names of potential significant others, and dates.
basically, in the words of the spice girls, if you wanna be their lover, you gotta get with their friends. by the second or third date with a potential bf/gf/date mate, you gotta sign up for a double date with a registered couple or April won’t give you the Very Serious paperwork to become a registered couple on the DDP chart.
(the Very Serious Paperwork is literally a sticky note to write your names on)
((also as much as March rants about how important it is to make sure your dating life and team life “mesh well”, this is not mandatory. Kelsey swears that there is something satisfying about having your names on a chart though.))
aka Organized Chaos Hell Night
also also known as Friday
there are three teams. it gets fucking scary. they have t-shirts. one time Amanda didn’t speak to Jessie for a whole day because she was supposed to do the research for the 80′s TV/Media category and she forgot and researched 90′s Politics. March was literally crying at lunch. April had to use her mom voice. it was horrible
the teams are:
Team Octopus: Kelsey, Bailey, Caitlin
Team Lioness: Jessie, Amanda, and Sara
Blue team: April, March, Molly, and Mallory
notable Trivia Night Disasters:
Sara and Kelsey had got into a shot competition twenty minutes before one night, and took turns ruining their respective scores by answering every TV/Media question with One Direction songs drunkenly
the time molly and Mallory just. Didn’t show up. the next day at practice April made Mallory run laps for “breathing too loudly” and March made molly do fifty push ups for “thinking about not calling the ball, i can see it on your face traitor”
the time they tried to turn it into a drinking game and Jessie managed to finish the game even after throwing up two (2) times like a fucking champ
“Couples Trivia Night” where march encouraged everyone to bring a date and the night ended up with three boys crying and a small fire
Pasta For Everyone Policy
basically everyone on this team is an evil food thief but one time Bailey made spaghetti and they all live on the same floor so Sara smelled it and tried to mooch, which led to her going back to her’s and Amanda’s room with fresh pasta, and then Amanda had to get in on that action and it basically set off a horrible chain reaction and Bailey had to grumpily go buy more spaghetti and feed everyone.
she forced everyone to promise that if they ever made pasta they’d make enough for everyone too as payback, and since then every time someone wants pasta it turns into a whole Thing
they had to buy a Really big pot, and it’s a shared investment.
The Leg Thing
This is a stupid game and no one likes it.
the basic goal is simple: get your leg the highest. however, the simplicity is slowly chipping away as these idiots keep. adding. rules.
the most horrible thing about the game is that no one knows how it begins. everyone seems to have a different idea as to how the game is set off.
Kelsey swears that the game can only start if April is wearing a red shirt, but bailey swears that one time they played and April was wearing a purple shirt
Caitlin says that the game starts whenever someone says “leg”. one time her and Amanda got in a fight about this, because Amanda said that was totally unrealistic, because leg is too common of a word. three hours later Caitlin was winning the leg game and googling “how often do you say ‘leg’” at the same time
one time Jessie made a petition and asked everyone around campus to sign it. she said that her cause was proving that the leg game starts when more than two people have freshly shaven legs that day
the rules are so stupid. like they just keep adding them. some of the best/worst rules:
in order to win, the leg height has to be held for at least three minutes. you also have to provide your own timer, and the alarm has to be a song where the chorus is in ¾ time
you’re not allowed to use any objects as leverage for your leg heightening, unless someone yells “peanut”, in which case you must immediately find something or someone to use as leverage
if you fall on your left arm, you can keep playing, but if you fall on your right arm you’re out.
there is now a new player in the game. someone is declared “the leg police” and their job is to go around and try to get the players to fall over without touching them
if it’s Wednesday, you can’t play the leg game. or can you.
if you win, you have to find a piece of chalk and write your initials somewhere in 9 minutes or less, or the runner up gets the crown
you’re not allowed to play the leg game if you’ve eaten an apple in the last 3 hours