WWVD if you were dating for about 2 or so years and one day you refuse to let them into your house unless they could answer a riddle that they had no idea how to answer?
*Let’s say you stole his phone to prevent googling and then locked him out*
N: Hakyeon doesn’t have time for games, but he think’s he’s hot stuff and can do any and everything. So, he’ll try to wow you with his knowledge. Now, If he can’t figure it out he’s going to stand there and complain about how unreasonable you’re being and then go find a stranger to help him. It’ll only take him a maximum of three tries before he leaves you. “Honey, this isn’t funny anymore! Open up–excuse me sir, care to help me solve a riddle?”
Leo: Despite not wanting to, Leo will at least humor your shenanigans because he loves you and he’s used to it. He would literally take a seat on the doorstep and try to figure it out, each wrong answer causing him to face palm and sigh loudly. If he can’t then he’ll most likely just try to leave and then you’ll have to let him in because you felt bad. But he’ll be long gone down the street in search of food. “How was that wrong, too? *sigh* I just want to come inside. Okay, ask me another one? *Trots off during your sentence*”
Ken: Pretty sure he’s going to just throw random answers at you until he gets it right. Using all his brainpower, Ken will retrieve anything in his mind that could remotely answer your riddle. Either he’ll eventually get it right or you’ll get tired of his randomness and just let him in. “Banana. Apple. Frog. Tree. Coyote. Beyonce. Shakira. Changsub. Shoes. Candy! My dick?!” OH MY GAWD. Get in the house! You’re talking too much!
Ravi: After trying to solve it and failing, Ravi will just stand there begging you to open the door. After one or two tries he’s had enough. He’ll knock on the door and plead with you until you break. But the minute he walks into the door he’ll act like he knew the answer when he really didn’t because just wanted to see if you would cave first. “I knew you’d give in. By the way, the answer was…no I’m not going to tell you.”
HongBin: HongBin will not waste time trying to figure out this riddle, so he’d straight up leave if he can’t figure it out. Instead of wasting time and brainpower on coming up with an answer, he’ll go searching for a window he can climb through or hit on the walls to freak you out and let him in. “Nope! I don’t have time for this today, love. *Bangs on walls* The old man next door already say we make too much noise at night so if you want avoid his wrath let me in!”
Hyuk: This is Hyuk! Of course he solved it pretty quick and on the first couple of tries. But in the chance that he doesn’t he’s going to start throwing riddles back at you for you to open the door. He’ll have that ‘two can play that game’ mind frame and probably somehow trick you instead. “Hey, babe. If you solve my riddle, I’ll let you come outside! *Asks you a riddle and without thinking you solve it and open the door* You make it too easy. You fall for this everytime.”
Here’s my Mother’s Day Picture, it features your favorite animated mothers including Mrs. Turner, Nicole Watterson, and more! Happy Mother’s Day, Plussers! My final designs of the Apple Pie and Frog Jumping Day will be posted in a few. Stick Around!
•Xanxus, having spent his hormonal teenage years plotting with ambitions to take over the Vongola and frozen in ice, and the time after that focused solely on eliminating people, freaks the heck out over romance, something that Squalo takes great pleasure in teasing him about, especially when they’re attending social functions.
•Squalo once orchestrated an entire romantic outing for Xanxus, whom swears up and down that he didn’t try to shoot his date’s head off when she tried to kiss him goodbye. Squalo’s got video and photographic evidence proving otherwise and it’s everyone(except Xanxus)’s favorite part of Lussuria’s Varia Home Videos
•Oh yeah, Lussuria has Varia Home Videos. And scrapbooks. Squalo’s Path the the Sword Emperor is a part of it.
•When Bel was little, he’d crawl into Squalo’s bed in the middle of the night and Squalo would wake up to tiny freezing cold icicle feet poking him. Bel’s mostly grown out of it by his teens but still occasionally does so just to piss Squalo off.
•Fran was recruited to the Varia at age 17 in the original timeline, but goes back and forth between the Kokuyo gang and the Varia in the current timeline. And he does the same crawling-into-Squalo’s-bed thing Bel did.
•Squalo hates kids as a result of these two (mostly Bel, though), but he’s surprisingly good with them.
•Alternate headcanon: Xanxus is a menace with women instead of a shy boy and this is one of the worst things about Squalo’s job because guess who has to deal with every woman coming in to make Xanxus take responsibility? Sometimes there are babies left on the Varia’s doorstep (starting approximately two years after Xanxus in unfrozen, a year or so after the end of KHR) and rather than putting them in an orphanage which may or may not be a far safer environment than a mansion of assassins, dangerous sharp pointy things, and Lussuria, Xanxus makes Squalo. Raise. All of them. Bel thinks there’s a hilarious irony in this but shuts up when he’s appointed Big Brother. He starts taking more missions more often after that, preferably long term ones in far away places. Squalo, given his new post as nanny/foster father, can usually be found with with a mini-Xanxus near him and can’t take the same kinds of missions as Bel begins to prefer for a while. Xanxus eventually tones it down, much to Squalo’s immense relief, because the brood has grown to over ten kids and Squalo is surprised with himself for doling out a healthy serving of paternal affection for each of them.
•Xanxus isn’t the best father but tries to connect with his kids. Sometimes. He still mostly leaves them to Squalo.
•Squalo was once almost arrested on charges of kidnapping and there is a really funny story behind this. So, one of the mini-Xans was playing in the park with some friends after school (it was the oldest, in kindergarten), and Squalo, because he was really embarrassed ‘cause parenting really isn’t his scene, just tried to casually pick him up while speed walking past. The kids’ mothers immediately called the police to apprehend him and Squalo argued with the cops for two hours until mini-Xan finally decided he was too sleepy to keep standing and tugged on Squalo’s pant leg, demanding to go home. The police mistakenly thought he was referring to a home away from Squalo, presumably with his parents, and one well meaning lady cop asked if he knew where he lived. He pointed in a direction vaguely westwards. When asked for an address, he looked up at Squalo and asked, “Papa, what’s our address?” because of course he didn’t understand that Squalo was arguing with the cops over his custody of him and didn’t see a need to speak up, not that the police would’ve believed him anyway because no one ever believes small children. This led to another half hour of arguing until mini-Xan stole Squalo’s phone and called Xanxus to come pick them up. Which he did. Which rendered Squalo temporarily speechless because he didn’t think calling Xanxus would actually work, except apparently it did as long as it was his kid who did the calling. Anyway, the police almost wet themselves in fear because Xanxus is an angry, angry man whose son was supposed to arrive home three hours ago. Oh, and whose second in command was supposed to finish filing a mountain of mission reports.
•In the beginning, Squalo tried to make the mini-Xans stop calling him ‘dad’ but eventually gave up when the fifth one arrived.
•He put his foot down when a few of them tried to call him ‘mom,’ though.
•Xanxus’s children love Tsuna. He’s their favorite uncle. Full stop.
•This is becoming a dumping ground for my mini-Xan headcanons what is wrong with me.
•Fran hates apples but loves frogs, their legs being a delicacy in France.
•Fran’s parents were both illusionists and, ironically, both worked for the Varia but were killed in action. His grandmother is a retiree.
•Squalo will on occasion go shopping with Lussuria, but only for hair products.
•Bel and Mammon have fought a literal war over the superiority of chocolate milk or strawberry milk. Xanxus couldn’t care less, Fran sided with Mammon for Illusionist Solidarity, Levi was ignored, and Lussuria tried to set up his own skim milk side but was overrun when Squalo appeared with the metaphoric dark horse whole white milk with Yamamoto. The victory went to the swordsmen.
•Yamamoto and Dino have Varianapped Squalo to force him to take a vacation.
•Bel or Fran is usually sent to take him back.
•On rare occasions when there’s no one to send, Xanxus joins them and takes his younglings with him, more or less ruining the vacation for Squalo who just. Wants. To. Rest.
•You thought I was done with the mini-Xans.
•Squalo has been mistaken for a woman. Multiple times. A few times even mistaken for Xanxus’s wife. Xanxus laughed for two and a half straight hours and almost perished of oxygen deprivation.
•Fran looks absolutely fetching in an evening gown and that always sends Bel into mirthful hysterics.
•Nana was once a member of the Varia—Tyr’s Sun officer. It’s how she met Iemitsu. She paid the Varia a visit when they arrived in town for the Ring Battles to see how the squad was doing.
•That has absolutely no basis whatsoever but you can’t deny it would make for an interesting AU. She liked poisons and kitchen knives, and standard-issue guns for long range.
•Before Squalo met Xanxus, he’d planned on joining the Cavallone as Dino’s right hand man.
•Squalo’s parents died when he was little, but he was adopted by his godfather, whom his father was the second in command for.
•Squalo grew up with five godsisters and the amount of insight he has in the confusing ways of women terrifies even him.
•His godsisters babysit the mini-Xans when he absolutely has to go on a long term/far away mission.
•Xanxus has told Levi 'good job’ a total of three times. Too bad he wasn’t conscious to hear it.
•No one is ever conscious when Xanxus praises them.
•Except Bester. Xanxus loves Bester. Oh, and the mini-Xans.
•Lussuria follows Squalo’s hair around like a lost puppy. Well, if lost puppies carried around hair ties, ribbons, clips, brushes, combs, curling irons…
•Squalo and Lussuria have both been kicked out of men’s public baths, both for entirely different reasons. Squalo got back in. Lussuria… didn’t.
•Squalo is a beast when it comes to paperwork. Tsuna wants him, even for two hours, because he’s certain Squalo would be able to decimate at least a twentieth of his massive pile of paperwork in that amount of time.
•When the stress gets too much and Squalo cracks, he doesn’t even wait to be abducted. He grabs the mini-Xans, Yamamoto, and heads out to sea. Half the mini-Xans are terrified by this, and the other half think it great fun.
•The mini-Xans all had the same first word: “VOOOOOOIIIII!!!” Their second word, naturally, was 'trash.’
•When a mini-Xan has been kidnapped, it VOOOOOOOIIIIIIs and the rest of them also VOOOOOOOIIIIII it’s like a pack of wolves howling to alert each other. Now, imagine this happening in the middle of one of the older ones’ exams, or just in general, or even on a date, “what are you doing” “MY KIN HAS BEEN ABDUCTED, I MUST GO SAVE HER” “how do you know it’s a her” “I JUST KNOW *runs off*”
•Squalo actually discourages cursing around the mini-Xans, but not violence.
•Xanxus’s naming sense is terrible so Squalo named all of his children. There’s Gladius and Saxton and Ken and Aldobrando and Brenda and Egbertyne and Hildebrandt and Hjordis and Sedge and…
•Bel thinks Squalo’s naming sense is just as bad as Xanxus’s, but he wanted to name one of them Bel-Wannabe because it smiled a lot so he’s got no room to talk.
•Levi and Lussuria also wanted to name some. They were flat out rejected.
•Squalo became friends with Dino because he knew his name meant 'little sword.’
•Yes, Squalo had always planned to name any children he ended up having after swords and did extensive research on names. So what.
•Squalo once had a crush on a girl named Zeva. She took one look at the sword in his hand and rejected him.
•I’m running out of ideas
•In a parallel universe where the Cradle Affair didn’t happen, Aria and Xanxus were drinking buddies.
•Xanxus wanted to name Yuni.
•Aria said no.
•He ended up naming her anyway.
•In a parallel universe to that one, Aria received a dream that a man who looked an awful lot like Timoteo’s youngest named her daughter Yuni. Figuring it a prophetic dream, she went with it.
•There is no basis for these either, I just thought it was funny.
•The Varia has a sub unit of seductresses, mostly Mists, who hang around Squalo a lot and he doesn’t know why, but they really need to stop trying to touch his hair it’s annoying.
•Xanxus finds it all hilarious.
•Xanxus is capable of cooking the best steaks anyone will ever eat in their entire life.
•Bel and Xanxus call Mammon a 'he’ because they know that it’s technically a gender neutral pronoun.
•They’re also the only ones in the Varia who know it’s a gender neutral pronoun.
May 13th is both National Apple Pie 🍎 and Frog Jumping Day! 🐸 My character Savage Coati and Mixels’ Gobba is celebrating Apple Pie Day by eating apple pie w/ Tree Trunks and Finn from Adventure Time and my new character Prince Croakling is celebrating Frog Jumping Day w/ Lana Loud and her frog Hops. He’s so hoppy about it! Stay tuned for the final design and the Mother’s Day Picture.