Look, I did what I was told to do. Slayed the dragon, stabbed it in the eyes, watched it burn itself to ash & bone. There were no applauding villages, no grateful kings, no humble gods. I came home with a dead thing wrapped around my waist & all you asked was whether I was planning on keeping it. Hands on your hips, the cat curling himself around your ankle. Said, we don’t need more responsibility. We don’t need another body to carry. I did what I was told to do. I don’t remember why the dragon had to die. I don’t remember if there was a princess or if she was saved or if she even had a name.
I’ve got you under my skin. I’ve got you deep in the heart of me.
I find you in the field beyond the sea, twisting flowers out of their stems. You smoked with the others, sand crusting the J, the paper wet with spit. Everything began to sink in and out of your horizon, then the ocean came too close, your mother reaching for your feet, & so you left. Walked straight up the grassy hill, scratchrose thorns kissing your heel. We biked all day, the wind scraping our cheeks. I was tired, you weren’t. In a few days, we’ll go back to New York & in a few months, we’ll graduate high school. We won’t talk outside of Facebook birthday posts & that long message I’ll send you when your foster dad dies. It happens in his sleep, in those timeless hours. One moment here, the next gone. Sinking in and out of the horizon. Right now, you’re stoned & you’re ripping out weeds. I give you my tuna fish sandwich & you tell me it has too much mayo. You toss me the bruised peach in your bag. Achilles, you never told me what drowning was like. You never told me it was the closest you had to a home.
I spill warm milk out the window and all the creatures whine at the doors. Look, I’m bad at playing hero – my cape’s on backwards & I always get lost in the forest. I know you’ve got your doubts. Listen, baby, things are gonna be okay. I never loved you like that anyway. In this story, I make you a girl, and in that story, you make me a boy. See? We can both be happy. I’ve watched you cradle loss like a newborn, the ground outside full of things we love. I’ve got my ghosts and they wear my old clothes so well. My favorite one slips between us when we sleep, holds both our hands, quiets the clotting in my chest, cools the sticky rocks in your throat.
And repeats, repeats in my ear: don’t you know, little fool, you never can win?
Much later, the water comes & we don’t do anything to stop it. You know how I die – don’t watch, okay? You know how ugly I am when I cry. I’ll miss you, sugar doll. I’ll miss you, bumblebee. I’ll miss you, Achilles. I’ll wait for you in that coffee shop in Meknes. I’ll wait for you in the Philly airport. Baby boy, I’ll drizzle you with chocolate sauce & eat you right up. I’ll see you in this life or the next or the next or the next.
I’m honestly laughing at the pro-Brexit touters and the shit they are coming out with. “This is our Independence Day”, “Britain is Great again!!!1”. What the fuck are these people celebrating. Well done, you’ve blocked the free movement of not only those who come to the uk to work in the jobs you’re too stuck up your own arse to do, not only those who are your doctors, nurses, lawyers, but you have also blocked the movement of YOUR OWN PEOPLE.
Why are you celebrating when within minutes of the first Leave vote coming in, the pound dropped. When the day we leave the EU, the pound drops to its lowest in 30 years??
Why are you applauding when King Back-Peddler, Dickhead Nigel Fucktarge openly admitted that one of their key policies for leaving the EU was a LIE??
Why are you happy that the cost of living is going to rise? Why do you feel so good about the possibility of thousands of families not being able to afford food? About the cost of already high petrol soaring?
Why why WHY was the choice of the future of this country ultimately decided by those who will likely not live long enough to even witness the long term repercussions of this, but those who’s futures were on the line, 16/17 year old who DID NOT want to leave, have been cast aside.
HOW can anyone be happy now that the future of our human/workers/etc rights rests SOLELY in the hands of a Conservative government. How can you celebrate that David Cameron is leaving, only for him to be replaced by a xenophobic, racist counterpart.
We live in a country of selfish people. We live in a country that does not care about its young people, that is so scared of migration they will willingly crash the economy to get what they want. A country where xenophobia and racism is being normalised every day.
But I bet all you fuckers will care when you’re on your shitty holiday to Maga and your 200 pack of Lambert and Butler isn’t 5 quid anymore.
You’ll be the first to complain when you can’t afford your weekly shopping bill.
When this country goes back into a recession we barely scraped our way out of.
But it’s okay coz u got dem immigrants out, right?