The Real Problem of Evil is Thinking Evil's a Real Problem

The idea that people can be completely evil and have no redeeming qualities, extenuating circumstances, or core humanity at all … That is the only place where true evil lies. The belief that some people are “evil” makes it easier for us to write them off, dehumanize them, destroy them, cease helping them. The idea of evil makes misbegotten moral righteousness possible, and justifies all manner of aggressive and hateful acts.

Sociopathy and antisocial personality disorder are just a repackaging of the age-old concept of pure unredeemable evil. It’s morality-driven dehumanization dressed in a clinical psychologist’s coat.

It is comforting to believe that people commit heinous acts because they are henious monsterous people. Such thinking protects us from wondering if we are capable of committing evil acts, if we are hateful and destructive. It also implies that ending suffering in the world is not a matter of slowly and constant reforming all our hearts and minds; it’s simply a matter of finding all the bad eggs and scrambling them.

The concept of sociopathic evil absolves us from doing the hard work of reforming criminals, remedying the precursors to crime, and examining the morality of our own actions. It is much easier to cast off the malicious as evil, disordered, defective, inhuman, exceptional, than it is to turn such a critical gaze upon ourselves.

By accepting the idea that “some people are just evil”, we resign ourselves to an overly simplified worldview where wrongs cannot be prevented, only punished, and where there is no broader societal responsibility for the sins of society’s children.


Albuquerque Police Department Substations Vandalized Overnight

Four Albuquerque Police Department substations across the city were vandalized with red paint Monday night.

The substations at Central and Rio Grande by Old Town, Central and Girard near the University of New Mexico, Montgomery and Tramway in the foothills and one on South Broadway were all painted overnight, according to an APD news release.

The defacement is most likely in retaliation to the recent shooting of James Boyd, a homeless man who was fatally shot after a three hour-long confrontation with police over illegal camping.

Residents have held several protests against police violence by Albuquerque police since the shooting last month.

In a highly scathing assessment, the Justice Department said Thursday that the Albuquerque Police Department, whose officers have shot a and killed 23 people in the past four years, had engaged in a “pattern or practice of use of excessive force,” often acting recklessly and violating people’s constitutional rights.

Body Cam Shows Innocent Man Severely Beaten By Cops For Calling His Sister

Incompetent police officers mistook an innocent man for a suspect last week, which left that man in the hospital.

As Arthur Velazquez was riding his bike down the street, police claimed that he ‘fit the description’ because he was wearing a hoodie and on a bike, so they stopped him. While he was detained, he simply pulled out his phone and called his sister out of concern that something bad was about to happen.

“I’m thinking about my own safety,” Velazquez said. “I had a feeling that with these two officers something bad was going to happen; that’s why I called my sister.

Unfortunately, his feeling of something bad happening came true when officers attacked him for making this call.

Police claim that they feared for their lives when Velazquez told them that he was calling his sister, so they had no other choice but the escalate the situation to violence and beat an innocent man.

You have additional people coming to the scene, and you are in fear,” Detective Steve Berry, with the Mesa Police Department said in regards to this innocent man using the phone. “Who might be armed, and showing up to assist.

Since these officers ‘feared’ a phone call, they proceeded to assault Velazquez. The incident was captured on the officer’s body cam.

At the beginning of the video, one officer can be seen attempting to pull the phone from Velazquez’s hand, but Velazquez tries to explain to his sister where he is just before being tackled to the ground.

After officers had slammed him on the ground, they began punching him the face for failing to prostrate himself before the badge fast enough. After realizing that they had just beaten an innocent man for no reason, police frantically searched for something to charge him with. They then issued Velazquez a ticket for not having the proper lighting on his bicycle.

Velazquez was brought to the hospital by his sister where he received multiple stitches and was diagnosed with a concussion.


Police never get enough, do they? I’m honestly sick and tired of reading articles about cops who “didn’t like they way someone was walking so they threatened to jail them” or cops who beat innocent people up for calling their relatives. This is violation of basic human rights! Not that these monsters know of human rights though.
The fact that police claimed they feared for their lives when Velazquez made the call is just pathetic. If you’re scared of cellphones, you’d better stay home and never even think about becoming a police officer!
What’s even more upsetting is what the Mesa Police Department Detective said - “Taking five minutes and complying and calling your sister when you got done, would have gone a long way.” As a person of color he should know that that wouldn’t necessarily have helped.
Velazquez is going to file a lawsuit and I hope he does get a compensation for this awful police misconduct.



Auditory Processing Disorder

What is APD?

It is NOT a hearing impairment.

“Typically the brain processes sounds seamlessly and almost instantly. Most people can quickly interpret what they hear. But with APD, some kind of glitch delays or “scrambles” that process. To a child with APD, “Tell me how the chair and the couch are alike” might sound like “Tell me how a cow and hair are like.”

Many conditions, including ADHD and autism, can affect a child’s ability to listen and understand what they hear. What makes APD different is that the problem lies with understanding the sounds of spoken language, not the meaning of what’s being said.”

So, here are some of the symptoms:

Auditory discrimination:The ability to notice, compare and distinguish between distinct and separate sounds. The words seventy and seventeen may sound alike, for instance.
Auditory figure-ground discrimination: The ability to focus on the important sounds in a noisy setting. It would be like sitting at a party and not being able to hear the person next to you because there’s so much background chatter.
Auditory memory: The ability to recall what you’ve heard, either immediately or when you need it later.
Auditory sequencing: The ability to understand and recall the order of sounds and words. A child might say or write “ephelant” instead of “elephant,” or hear the number 357 but write 735.

Children with APD usually have at least some of the following symptoms: 

  • Find it hard to follow spoken directions, especially multi-step instructions
  • Ask speakers to repeat what they’ve said, or saying, “huh?” or “what?”
  • Be easily distracted, especially by background noise or loud and sudden noises
  • Have trouble with reading and spelling, which require the ability to process and interpret sounds
  • Struggle with oral (word) math problems
  • Find it hard to follow conversations
  • Have poor musical ability
  • Find it hard to learn songs or nursery rhymes
  • Have trouble remembering details of what was read or heard

Some accommodations you can set up for APD involve:

  • Speech therapy: learn how letters and words sound to you, and how to identify what you’re hearing and what is being said. 
  • Better seating: sit close to what you’re trying to listen to, and get other audio distractions away.
  • Improve the acoustics: close doors and windows, just try to get rid of any outside sounds.
  • Visuals: its the info you HEAR that is not processing correctly in the brain, so visual information like photos, graphs, and subititles may be beneficial.


SIGNS OF AUDITORY DYSFUNCTION: (no diagnosed hearing problem)

1. HYPERSENSITIVITY TO SOUNDS (auditory defensiveness):

  • distracted by sounds not normally noticed by others; i.e., humming of lights or refrigerators, fans, heaters, or clocks ticking
  • fearful of the sound of a flushing toilet (especially in public bathrooms), vacuum, hairdryer, squeaky shoes, or a dog barking
  • startled by or distracted by loud or unexpected sounds
  • bothered/distracted by background environmental sounds; i.e., lawn mowing or outside construction
  • frequently asks people to be quiet; i.e., stop making noise, talking, or singing
  • runs away, cries, and/or covers ears with loud or unexpected sounds
  • may refuse to go to movie theaters, parades, skating rinks, musical concerts etc.
  • may decide whether they like certain people by the sound of their voices


  • often does not respond to verbal cues or to name being called
  • loves excessively loud music or TV
  • appears to “make noise for noise’s sake”
  • seems to have difficulty understanding or remembering what was said
  • appears oblivious to certain sounds
  • appears confused about where a sound is coming from
  • talks self through a task, often out loud
  • had little or no vocalizing or babbling as an infant
  • needs directions repeated, says “what” frequently



Militarized Police Clash With Anti-Brutality Protesters

Demonstrations over a recent police shooting turned into what the mayor of Albuquerque called “mayhem" on Sunday, as protesters there clashed with police during a 10-hour long rally.

Hundreds of protesters took to the streets and freeways of New Mexico’s largest city in response to the death earlier this month of James Boyd, a homeless man who was fatally shot after a three hour-long confrontation with police over illegal camping.

Protesters repeatedly marched from downtown Albuquerque to the University of New Mexico campus, around two miles away, blocking traffic and shouting anti-police slogans. As tensions escalated, officers responded with tear gas.

The videos below show protesters, carrying signs that read “End The Police State” and “Who’s Next?” confronting police in riot gear. Other footage shows demonstrators marching, including some wearing Anonymous masks and walking up to officers.

The shocking video of Boyd’s shooting (Graphic), which was captured by an officer’s helmet-mounted camera and released by police, went viral and drew stern condemnation.

After shooting a tear gas canister at Boyd and releasing an attack dog, police shot the man as he had his back turned.

The US Justice Department has been investigating the Albuquerque police department for more than a year, after several allegations of civil rights violations and abuse of force, which New Mexico residents say have gotten progressively worse. The FBI also opened an investigation into Boyd’s death.

Watch: Police Shoot Tear Gas At Protesters


U think u relate to a personality disorder specific post? Of course u do! It’s part of everyone’s personality to be moody sometimes, to want to be with those u love, to maybe drink too much occasionally, to have an off day.
But the point of pd posts is that it is a /disorder/ !! And it affects everything(!) we do. We’re so intensely ‘moody’ it’s hard to function well, we need constant, unending reassurance of things like ‘is what I’m doing okay/does this person still care for me even tho they’ve said they do just half an hour ago’, we self destruct to the point it takes over what we’re doing such as drinking too much every single time we drink, we can go months feeling nothing and basically being a walking robot. So, u merely relate to the superficial meaning of a simplified concept, we identify with and live it.


I get really fucking bored.

This was exceptionally true during summers. When I’m bored, I can get bad.

My body feels insensitive, my impulses get worse, I very slowly lose control over my mask, etc.

The more bored I get, the worse I get. I need to do something. Anything. It’s part of why I have so many projects. They keep me entertained, interested. It’s why I have so many friends/acquaintances. 

When my body becomes insensitive I begin to feel like a large, dark and empty room. And I hate feeling that way. And so I’ll do anything to not. And slowly that need to feel something different strips away my inhibitions. I’ll contemplate self-harm, not out of sadness or depression; but because I just want to feel something different and at that point it doesn’t really matter if it’s pain. Not to say I self-harm, I’m simply stating that I contemplate it if I get far too bored.

I slowly lose the ability to hide myself as well. When I’m extremely bored I just can’t care enough to hide myself as well. I reveal my apathy and irritability more than I mean to from time to time because of this. 

Perhaps when I think about my greatest weakness, this is it. My boredom. It hasn’t landed me in trouble, but it potentially could. It can make me rash. Naturally this is a rare issue because I have hobbies, projects, acquaintances, etc to keep me entertained. Also I pride myself with good self-control, it takes a long period of boredom to get to me.

I just wish everything wasn’t so fucking boring.

Receptive language problems vs. auditory processing problems.

I see people confuse these things all the time, so this is just an attempt to differentiate them.  Because I have them both.  And they’re worlds apart, completely different, even though sometimes they have similar results ona superficial level.

Auditory Processing Disorders

So a lot of people know about CAPD, Central Auditory Processing Disorder, and a lot of autistic people are diagnosed with it, or could be diagnosed with it.  CAPD basically means that whether or not you have any actual hearing problem, your brain has trouble making sense out of what you hear.  It often results in problems like:

  • Trouble differentiating between different sounds in words.  Like th vs f, ch vs sh, things like that.  Similar-sounding words get confused with each other.  Some people can barely differentiate between any consonants at all while other people only have trouble differentiating between very similar consonants in very similar contexts.
  • Trouble picking out one voice out of many voices.  So if two people are talking, you can have trouble focusing in on one of them, or you can get the conversations confused and mixed up.  Or it just sounds like a jumble.
  • Words may just sound like a jumble of sounds that you can’t make out anything about at all.  
  • Trouble hearing words against background noise.
  • Trouble remembering auditory information.
  • Trouble paying attention to auditory information.
  • Auditory distortions, both word and non-word.
  • Tendency to overload quickly when dealing with auditory information.

And that’s just a short list of problems, there’s a lot more.  But basically the thing about auditory processing disorders is that they are not language disorders.  They affect your ability to understand language through auditory channels.  If they’re severe enough, they can prevent learning language for the same reason that a hearing loss can prevent learning language.  But they are not, themselves, language problems.  They’re hearing problems, they’re just brain-based hearing problems instead of ear-based hearing problems.

Receptive language problems

Receptive language problems mean trouble comprehending language.  This means language in all of its forms: spoken, written, or sign language, although depending on the person, some of those may be easier or harder than others for various reasons.  But basically, a receptive language problem isn’t based in hearing, it’s based in the words themselves.  

The best way I can contrast an auditory processing disorder with a receptive language disorder is by extremes:

1.  You hear all the sounds in the words perfectly, you have no trouble differentiating any of the consonants, you have no trouble with any aspect of actually hearing the words. If you wanted, you could repeat back the words verbatim with no trouble.  And yet you can get no meaning out of the words at all.

2.  You understand that words are supposed to have meaning, you can think the words just fine, things like that.  But when you actually hear the words, they sound jumbled, garbled, muttered, mumbled, or like gibberish, or you have trouble differentiating some of the words from others, or things like that.  But you know they’re words and you can get meaning out of them if you could only hear them properly.

The first is a receptive language problem.

The second is an auditory processing problem.

When I was growing up, I had severe receptive language problems and much milder auditory processing problems (and severe visual processing problems).  They interact with each other in various ways, but they are not the same thing.  

Having a receptive language problem means that you have trouble understanding all language.  Sometimes it even means that you don’t know language exists, or could exist.  Words are just sounds – sounds that you may be able to make out perfectly well, but they don’t have meaning.  And that’s the difference:  Whether the problem is the sound, or whether the problem is that you can’t get meaning out of words.  A receptive language problem is a problem of meaning, not a problem of sensory processing.

Severe enough sensory processing issues can lead to receptive language problems, though.  Because if you can’t process sound well enough to hear words, you’re not going to hear the words, and you’re not going to develop the ability to understand words unless you find some alternate way to get words into your brain.  But there’s still a difference – receptive language problems that arise on their own, are a core cognitive issue, not a hearing or visual issue.

Receptive language problems can do very strange things to cognitive and language development.  Some people with receptive language problems can become accomplished mimics who can parrot back what we know other people expect to hear, and mask those problems altogether.  (This is apparently a known thing that even happens to people who lose receptive language during brain injuries and the like:  It can sometimes take really specific testing to keep them from fooling you into believing they understand every word you’re saying.)  Other people with receptive language problems aren’t able to compensate in that way.

Receptive language problems often change in intensity over time, or even over the course of a day, so at some times a person may understand language relatively well, and at another time they may not be able to understand it at all.

My situation at this point in my life is that I can understand language, but it’s always a struggle to do it.  It’s like every time I have to understand language, I’m climbing a cliff.  And every time I have to pay attention to something else I let go and fall back down to the ground, where language doesn’t exist.  And then if I want to understand language I have to climb the cliff again.

Sometimes I’m not able to make the climb, or to make the climb as high as other people.

My receptive language problems also shaped the entire form of my expressive language to the point that speech is unusable and writing is usable but difficult, and that’s a whole nother story in itself.

But basically I hear people throwing around the words ‘receptive language problems’ and 'auditory processing problems’ interchangeably.  And most of the time it seems like they’re actually talking about auditory processing problems.  I’ve found that among autistic people online, auditory processing problems seem much more common than serious receptive language problems.  This is probably because only some people with serious receptive language problems manage to outgrow or overcome them enough to communicate easily online.  Whereas lots and lots of people with auditory processing problems learn language and have fewer problems with communicating online.  So in online groups of people, CAPD is going to be more heavily represented than severe receptive language problems.  

But lots of people have both, and people can have mild receptive language problems as well.  And for many autistic people, receptive language becomes iffy under stress, even if the rest of the time it seems fine.  Sort of like expressive language can go away under stress even in people with no significant delays in expressive language early in life.

Anyway, I hope I’ve made it easier to differentiate between the two.  And I hope I haven’t just added to the confusion.  My brain is kind of iffy at the moment, because I’m sleepy.


Hearing is all on a spectrum.  There’s a different set of experiences that comes with growing up profoundly deaf, growing up hearing and then losing a fraction of your hearing, growing up hearing and then losing all of your hearing, growing up with a different set of hearing capabilities that may or may not change over time, growing up hearing but having your brain scramble the sounds, growing up deaf or HH and having your brain scramble the sounds you can hear, growing up not able to hear and then acquiring some or all hearing through the use of hearing devices or some other method of change, and growing up hearing. 

It is very complex.

And that’s why you need to stop telling people what they are or what they’re not, because it’s not that easy to categorize.  That’s why you need to stop looking at deafness as one thing that you can define based on that one thing alone.  That’s why you need to stop interrogating people by asking questions like, “Then why don’t you know any sign language?” or “How come you don’t wear hearing aids, then?” or “Why do you talk like that?"  That’s why you need to stop telling people they’re playing the "disability card” because they can hear and talk just fine - you don’t know how well a person can hear.  You can never know how someone else hears until you ask.  That’s why alternatives to speaking are essential for communication, and why you need to let them happen.  That’s why Deaf Talent is important.  That’s why Deaf and Hard of Hearing communities need to exist, and why they need to be represented everywhere.

Hearing is complex.

Dear Deaf Person,

I apologize if any hearing person has made you feel crappy for not responding when they try to get your attention. It’s not my responsibility to apologize on their behalf, but I’m doing so because I want you to know that you are not a crappy person. You are not inferior. You’re above the image they have created of you based on ignorance. Your deafness has little defining relevance in your beauty or your intelligence; you are infinitely both regardless. So, it’s okay to brush it off if someone insinuates you’re a jerk because you didn’t hear or understand them. Their ignorance is not relevant. Their frustration and their hate is beneath you. They are ultimately missing out because your experience is reserved only for those open to it.



A slam poem about language barriers and communication issues.  Originally intended to describe my deaf experience, but then I realized these are shared experiences of D/deaf/HOH/APD people, people with learning differences, and those living in countries where people do not speak their native language(s).

Awareness is key.

CC is available.