anyways here they are in case you still wanted them

Kyle: …I get you’re in sorrow, and I’m disappointed no less than you, but look on the bright side – it doesn’t mean anything yet, Del. Electrocution. It might have been just an unfortunate accident. Billie probably wanted to fix the machine and something went wrong.

Adele: Y-yeah. But it’s still a death. I don’t think anyone wants to compete for my love anymore, and frankly speaking… I care about all of them. I don’t want to take risks. Let’s get out of here as soon as we can.

Kyle: Anyway, just in case it’s turned MMBC… we’ll have to determine the murderer first in order to get them arrested, before they killed more people. And when we do, we’ll apologize to all the remaining contestants and let them out. Deal? Okay, you can have a rest… I’ll ask them questions about Billie.

Adele: I’ve got a bad feeling, Kyle. I’m almost certain it wasn’t an accident. I want to believe you, but there’s one to a million chance someone can accidentally die on a BC.

Safe and Sound (You’ll Always Be) by Rearviewdreamer

Length: 58k

“Hey, wait a minute. Where are you going?”

“Out,” Louis answers matter-of-factly, now tapping away on his phone. He sends off one quick text before getting to work on another.

“I thought you were going to rest for a while?” That’s what he said he was going to do anyway. Louis gives an unbothered shrug of his shoulders as he reaches the door.

“Hmm? Oh, yeah I changed my mind. I want to go shopping instead and then I’m going to get dinner with some mates.” He pauses with his hand on the doorknob. “That’s not going to be a problem is it?”

It’s inconvenient as fuck because Harry still has things he needs to do here, but it’s not an actual problem per se. He can always do them later.

“No, that’s fine, Louis. You can go shopping and out to dinner with your friends. Just not by yourself, remember?”

When a failed case and a guilty conscience leaves Harry more than a little lost, his boss presents him with a new, less taxing assignment to help him cope. An escape from all the madness is just what Harry needs to get his life back on track. It’s just too bad his new client has a grin like the devil, a pair of electric eyes that Harry simply can’t get over, and no intention whatsoever of letting him catch a break.

Ao3, Chaptered, Completed

I used to work in a large retail bookstore that had filed for bankruptcy and was having a going out of business sale. We kept finding books hidden behind shelves or display fixtures that were empty, clearly someone trying to save books so they could buy them in a week or two after the price dropped again. Our standard procedure was to just take them back to the section they belonged in.

One night I was cleaning up about an hour before we closed so that we could try to leave on time. This was already the last month and it was a very large store, so we had several areas cleared of product and taped off to discourage customers from going there and we were mostly using those areas to store fixtures we had already sold and were waiting for someone to pickup.

As I was doing my walk through I noticed a large stack of books on one of the fixtures in this area. I picked up the stack and was walking back to the desk to sort them when a woman yells across the store, “Those are mine, put them back where you found them!!”

I respond as politely as possible, in case she has in fact purchased them, “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t see a receipt, have you already paid for them?”

“No, of course not. Why would I pay for them now when I can get them for much cheaper in 2 weeks. I am hiding them so that they are still here on the final day.”

“I’m sorry ma'am, our current policy does not allow for that. If you would like them now I can take the to the register for you and our cashier can ring you up, otherwise I am going to have to put them back on the shelf in case someone wants to buy them before the price drops again.”

“I need to speak to your manager. This is absolutely ridiculous.”

“Ma'am I am the floor manager in the building tonight, my supervisor will be in tomorrow morning if you would like to speak to her, but I am the most senior employee here at the moment.”

“Fine, put the fucking books back. No wonder you are going out of business. I can still get the books cheaper on Amazon anyway, don’t even know why I even tried.”

Happy 1 Year of Iwaoi!!!

Since I have recently risen from the dead, I am back to celebrate the 1 year anniversary of ao3feed-iwaoi! (also as a huge apology for not keeping up with my recs for 5 months :\ )

So! I will be recommending 12 of my favorite fics - one for each month.

(I will also be doing supplementary recs for the 5 months I missed and the August rec will be coming soon as well)

Let us begin.

1. Valhalla by SuggestiveScribe

(Just a heads up - This fic is only for registered users of the archive. However, you can read it here on the author’s blog (x) )

Mature, Published: 2015-10-24, One-Shot, 16,795 words

- One of my favorite IwaOis of all time. Definitely top 10, quite possibly top 5. It’s so good I made a playlist of my own, which you can listen to here: (x) Anyway, Valkyrie Oikawa and stubborn WWII Soldier Iwaizumi who just won’t die.

Pair This With: (I am not adding these to the IwaOi Recs playlist because it will mess it up but I will link them elsewhere in case you still want to listen)

Pieces by Andrew Belle (x)

Oblivion by M83 (ft. Susanne Sundfor) (x)

(These songs are the last 2 songs on my playlist for this fic so I will tag that below)

Ad Astra (x)

2. we’re still the same by PotatoButt

Teen and Up, Published: 2015-04-13, 2 chapters, 23,037 words

- Also one of my favorites! (Can you tell I’m stacking this rec already? That’s how sorry I am) All you need to know is Prince Oikawa and Best Friend/Castle Assistant Iwaizumi.

Pair This With: Talk Me Down by Troye Sivan (x)

3. take shelter by gabstar

Not Rated, Published: 2015-10-22, One-Shot, 4,888 words

- SFW. HOLY ANGST!!!! Doubtful Hajime with a happy ending.

Pair This With: Take Shelter by Years and Years (x)

4. balustrade by nacos

Mature, Published: 2016-02-29, One-Shot, 10,796 words

- Featuring violinist Oikawa and suffering new neighbor Iwa-chan ft. devious Suga. Daichi is just there to angst.

Pair This With: Dernière Danse by Indila (x) (yes, its French)

5. Iwaizumi Hajime is not an Astronaut by sabasama

General Audiences, Published: 2015-12-16, One-Shot, 3,054 words

- Seperate University AU, Iwaizumi surprises Oikawa. Snowball fight ensues.

Pair This With: Not on Drugs by Tove Lo (x)

6. get ripped, get laid by safra

General Audiences, Published: 2016-03-03, One-Shot, 13,757 words

- Personal Trainer Iwaizumi gets a new, very interesting, client who won’t stop asking him out for drinks. Kind of a plot twist? (dw it’s not bad or anything, You’ll love it, I promise!)

Pair This With: Powerful by Major Lazer feat. Ellie Goulding & Tarrus Riley (x)

7. Anesthetic Truth by aetherdrive

General Audiences, Published: 2015-08-07, One-Shot, 1,068 words

- Iwaizumi gets his appendix removed, Oikawa cries and Mattsun and Makki will never let either of them live this down.

Pair This With: Crazy For You by Hedley (x)

8. Either Way by Ellessey

Explicit, Published: 2016-06-25, One-Shot, 14,931 words

- Oikawa talks too much. It’s a good thing Iwaizumi knows how to handle him. (Seperate Uni AU with LOTS of smut)

Pair This With: Misery by Maroon 5 (x)

9. In Defense of Reptiles (and Other Gross Things) by rikke

Teen and Up Audiences, Published: 2016-02-26, One-Shot, 9,346 words

- HQ Harry Potter AU in which Iwaizumi is the Slytherin perfect and Oikawa is just a mess.

Pair This With: Youth by Troye Sivan (x)

10. Through My Eyes by anchoringsouls

General Audiences, Published: 2016-01-11, One-Shot, 2,831 words

- Oikawa brings Iwa-chan to pick out frames for his glasses. It becomes their tradition. (this fic makes me cry EVERY DAMN TIME!!!!!!! It’s very cute, but bittersweet at the end. You can’t hate it though because it’s really well written and just SO GOOD. One of my all-time favorites)

Pair This With: Heaven by Troye SIvan (x)

11. yellow white red (camellia/gardenia) by ambivia

Teen and Up Audiences, Published: 2016-05-31, One-Shot, 9,012 words

- Oikawa walks into Iwaizumi’s flower shop one day and his life is never the same. Featuring a suffering Ushijima and his droopy geraniums. (ooohh boy this is another of my all-time favorites. Can you tell I stacked the beginning and end of this rec? hahaha)

Pair This With: Celeste by Ezra Vine (x)

Desire by Years & Years (x)

12. on lightning, on luster by tothemoon - @companions

Mature, Published: 2015-04-10, 7/9 chapters (on-going), 86,303 words

- This is tied for my all-time favorite IwaOi fic (I’ll share the other one later (; ). I can’t even explain it? It’s so… ethereal. My favorite iwaois are those that span every dimension and time period. I love the concept of death in this fic. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve cried. I also have to commend (ha, what a weak word for such a strong image) the imagery in this. It’s so so SO strong I can’t forget it. I passed by a house near mine one Tuesday morning this summer and I saw a beautiful field full of flowers in bloom and I immediately was reminded of this fic. (picture below!!) I have loved this fic for over a year now and I can’t wait to see how it finishes! (I’ll probably be completely wrecked, but it will have been a long time coming)

Pair This With: We Belong by RAC ft. Katie Herzig (x)

Circles by Passenger (x)

16 Years by The Griswolds (x)

Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men (x)

We Move Like the Ocean by Bad Suns (x)

There is a playlist for this. It’s not mine, but please please please listen!! 

thunder and lightning (x)

Wow this took a really long time! I tried not to give away all of my favorite fics for this because I still want some for my monthly recs. I hope I have apologized thoroughly for my absence. On a higher note, thank you guys for supporting and reading IwaOi from this blog for a whole year!! My goal with this blog and my recs is to help authors get their well deserved exposure. With my recs I try to recommend fics that are very well written and leave a lasting impression on me, even though they may not get many kudos or be very long. So, I hope that with this you discover a few new fics that you’ve never read before. Be sure to check out these authors too because they are amazing!

(Like I mentioned before, these songs are not being added to the Rec Playlist, but I’m still tagging it below)

Rec Playlist (x)

IwaOi Rec Masterlist (x)

Son shine

This short story is about Naruto’s first ever “conversation” with his son Shinachiku 


Naruto did not move when he heard Sakura stir besides him. He expected her to awaken, but she drifted back to sleep.

Quietly Naruto reached under the blanket. He rested his right palm against her taut belly, feeling life stirring within. Naruto then gently rubbed Sakura’s stomach in a clockwise manner. A wave of emotion rose up inside him so strong he thought it would overwhelm him. The trouble was this emotion was unfamiliar to him.

It was new.

It was a strange concoction of happiness, concern, love, fear and pride. He had never experienced this before and especially with such intensity. He was unsure on how to come to terms with it.

Pulling his hand away, Naruto shifted himself downwards until his face aligned with his wife’s belly.

“Hey, you are my son” he whispered.

Keep reading

MINHO - Reflex

Request: hey, i love your blog!! could u write a maze runner imagine where the reader is the new greenie and the only girl, and jumps out oft he box and starts running but someone (newt or something idm) grabs her but by instinct she hits him, then feels really guilty and sorry? sorry if this doesn’t make much sense , but i love ur writing and ur awesome!!!

(Thank you so very much! Anyway, I hope it’s alright with ya that I wrote Minho. It seemed to me that he would be the first to run after the crazy new greenie running cuz he’s a keeper of the runners =3 i hope this is to your liking!)


Sunlight hit your eyes and blinded your vision. The opening of the metal box had just creaked open and you now stood face to face with a crowd of boys looking down on you with uncertainty in their face. You cautiously stood up, never breaking eye contact.

“That’s not a boy,” someone had whispered, the silence amplifying the sound.

“A girl, that’s what they call it,” replied another.

Questions were already racing through your head but you shook them all off and pushed them away. You didn’t need those questions right now. You just wanted a way out. And you found it. Directly on top of you, a gap was in between the crowd of boys. Wide enough for you to scoot through if you ran fast enough. Where would you end up? Didn’t matter. You would figure that part out later.


Gritting your teeth, you leapt up and out of the box and sprinted as fast as your legs could carry you. Jeers from the boys arose. “We’ve got ourselves a runner here!”

Good, keep going. Keep running.

You looked everywhere around you, just green grass and four gray walls. Where exactly were you going?

Keep running, keep running.

The cheers from behind you had gotten louder and you didn’t care for the reason why. You didn’t know them, you didn’t know this place and there was no reason for you to look back at them.

You gotta get out, you gotta get out.

All of a sudden, an arm snaked around your waist and pulled you back. You shrieked at the sudden, unfamiliar and unwanted contact. “Let me go!” you yelled and elbowed the one who held you captive hard in the torso.  You heard the thud as he yelped in pain but your attempt to escape resulted in failure.

 “What did you do that for, shank?” he said as the other arm came around you and tackled you to the ground. With a groan, your back hit the cold grass and you felt your brain shake in your skull. Despite the pain, you found yourself staring into dark brown eyes of a tanned and black-haired boy, panting and trying to catch his breath. He had both your arms pinned to the side of your head while his strong build hovered over your fragile body and you didn’t know what to make of the situation.

Your chest heaved up and down as you panted but he seemed unfazed, his eyes still locked with yours. Truthfully, it felt like all of time had frozen.

But he was a stranger. You didn’t know him. You had every right to protest.

“Let me go,” you said through gritted teeth .

“Nope,” he smiled mischievously. “Not until Alby gets here.”


“I’ll say it again,” you muttered harshly. “Let. Me. Go.” You tried to strain your wrists with the hope of being able to slip past his grip.

“Stop trying, you’re going to hurt yourself.”

“Let me go!” you yelled as you struck your knee against his thigh.

“Didn’t hurt, nice try,” he chuckled.

“Minho, easy,” another voice said. This Minho boy looked up and so did you, a very authoritative looking man greeting your sight. “I’ll take it from here.”

Minho stood up but still held you by one wrist in case you tried to make a run for it again. “All yours, Alby.”


The Glade. Gladers. You didn’t know your name but you were one of them now. You stared into the fire as lunch was being prepared by the person who had introduced himself to you as Frypan. You sat alone, too afraid to talk to anyone and everyone else seemed too busy in their own conversations to talk to you anyway. Every inch of your new environment threatened you in every away despite all of what Alby had said. You didn’t want to be here.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn’t notice someone sit beside you until his knee accidentally brushed against his yours. Surprised, you flinched in your seat as you heard a familiar chuckle.

“Name’s Minho,” he smiled

Oh. The boy who pinned you down.

“I know,” you mumbled. Slightly happy at the thought of company yet still afraid and wondering why he had even bothered to sit next you.

“Guessing you can’t tell me your name yet,” he casually replied as he took a swig of something that had a terrible stench which shot straight up through your nose.

“Right,” you wrinkled your nose then pinched the bridge, unwilling to smell more of what it was he was drinking. “What is that? That smells disgusting.”

“Frypan’s brew. Goes down like liquid fire but you get quite used to it,” he laughed as he took another swig.

“I liked how you ran,” he added.

“You liked how I ran? I elbowed you and struck you with my knee,” you began. “Oh, right, I’m really sorry for that!” you added as you shook your head in disapproval of your demeanor earlier on. You really did feel quite guilty.

He chuckled. “It’s alright, greenie. Reflexes, we all have them. And you’ve got ‘em pretty good.”

You felt an uncontrollable smile claim your lips and it was honestly the most secure you’ve ever felt since the moment you bolted from that box.

“Thanks,” you shyly responded as heat crept up to your cheeks.

“You’re gonna fit in just fine,” he said as he chuckled again and his low chuckle this time made you feel something very different but very likeable. Unfamiliar, yet pleasing.

He turned to look at you and electricity connected between your eyes. You knew because you felt your skin shiver and currents run through your veins.

“I already like you,” he mumbled as he immediately shut himself up with the last mouthful of brew. 


Experiences at my sales call job and I’ve only been here two weeks
  • talking to a man who says he can’t use phones or computers, because the magnetic fields around them are dangerous to him, and could kill him, so he has to avoid all electronics, and this is definitely a real illness, his doctor told him, you can call his doctor if you want to confirm (I never challenged him on it, but he still let me know this anyway, I also didn’t ask him how he was talking to me on a phone if this was the case), also we had to be careful what we were saying, because the government is listening
  • A guy who, for work reasons, I’ve had to call multiple times who’s always like “oh hey baby hey California girl, yeah I gots time for u baby girl, you can call me any time” and I always have to be like COOL SO. YOU WANNA GIVE ME MONEY. OR WHAT. 

  • the man I call from Louisiana who found out I was calling from Los Angeles and was like “All the way from Hollywood? Wow this signal is really strong! That’s a long telephone line! I can hear you so well! That’s amazing!” and was just so amazed by the existence of phones and I thought oh my god Skype would blow this dude’s fucking mind

  • ALSO CUTE MAN FROM LOUISIANA about my calling from Los Angeles, “Am I going to be on TV?” 

Okay so part of our script that we have to read involves asking the person on the line if they’ve heard of Netflix. We state at the beginning who we’re calling from. We are not Netflix. We just need to know if the person on the line even knows what Netflix is because if they don’t then we can’t sell them our thing. And you would be surprised how many people don’t know what Netflix is. But that’s not the point.

  1. The point is I ask this guy with a thick Southern accent during a call if he’s heard of Netflix and he says, “Is this Netflix? I have been trying to get ahold of you!!! I used to love your service!” and then he starts shouting, “It used to have good shows and movies on it! But now its all just GARBAGE! I want to cancel and I can’t figure out how! You’re from Netflix! Tell me how to get rid of Netflix!”

    “Sir, I’m not from Netflix. This isn’t Netflix.”

    “Then why did you say you were?”

    “I didn’t. I asked if you’d heard of Netflix.”

    “Well now you’re just playing word games. You fancy Californian. Why would you do that? Why would you trick me-?”

    “I- didn’t… I was calling-”

    “Why would you trick a Texan? Why did you do that? What Californian would think its safe to trick a Texan?”

    “I wasn’t trying to trick you.”

    “Don’t trick a Texan! I’m from Texas! Fuck You!”
  • the gross Islamaphobe Homophobe today who derailed about how the liberal media and Muslims (while Trump’s not his favourite “at least Trump will deport all the Muslims”) are responsible for the Orlando shooting and every other mass shooting and we’re supposed to pretend to agree with whatever the person on the other line says to a point and try to steer them towards the product but after seven minutes I was seeing red and was just like OH NO LOOKIT THAT I JUST ~LOST~ THE CONNECTION BY ABSOLUTELY HANGING UP ON YOU WOW I HOPE YOUR FLESH MELTS SLOWLY OFF YOUR BODY AND YOU FEEL PAIN FOR THE REST OF TIME BYE

  • The woman who answered and I asked for her husband, because he was the guy in our database (this happens a lot, and a lot of street smart wives screen our calls before their more recklessly spending husbands can get them), but instead of it going like it normally does, where the wife just says something about not appreciating solicitation and whatever, this time after the wife asked who was calling and I said “Jessica from [company]” she was like “Howard, that motherfucking whore. Another one. Are you another one of his girls?” and I was like “UM, NO I WAS JUST CALLING-” and she was like “I don’t want to hear any of your excuses, trying to make it look like business. You never call here again.” and she sounded pissed. HOWARD, WHEREVER YOU ARE, I AM SORRY. 

and my favourite

  • when I call at first I can’t get an answer, and I hear a guy with a thick Minnesota accent saying “No, leave the body ‘til the team comes! No don’t touch the body” and finally I’m like “Hello? Hello?” and thick Minnesota accent goes “Who is this?” and I’m like “Jessica from [company]. Is Bill there?” and Minnesota goes “Bill is DEAD. This is a MURDER CASE. I’m the SHERIFF and you just CALLED THE CRIME SCENE.  That makes you a MURDER SUSPECT.” and I was like, “Ah, really? He’s dead?”, “YES. HE’S DEAD. What did you say your name was again? We’re going to need to take you in for questioning.” And I’m like completely sure this was a guy sick of telemarketers pulling my leg and at this point I was laughing too hard so I just mumbled something about having a nice day and hung up and had to pause calls for three minutes until I could stop laughing to move on.
Family Matters | Part 9

TW please read with caution! EDITED (slightly bc I didn’t like where I went with it…) I hope you enjoy it!xx-Ash

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

“Dear the BAU, these men have taken me and want $3 million in order for my safe return. Respond within 2 hours otherwise I will…” you read ahead and looked up at the men the fear in your eyes “lose my sight? What? What do you mean?” the video ended and a web address appeared on the screen.

“We need to pay the money!” Reid turned to Hotch who opened his phone and left the room to make a call.

“Baby girl how long ago did this come in?” Morgan held Garcia’s hand tightly.

“30 minutes ago. The website is on your tablets. They want evidence that we are willing to pay the money. We have an hour and a half ”

“Garcia go work on tracing it I need to figure out our next move.” She left and walked back towards her ‘cave’ whilst he headed towards his office


In the dark room the only light you could see was from the keyhole. The voices from the next room broke the silence every once in a while. The chain connecting your ankle to the floor rattled with each movement. The feeling of the ropes grazing your skin was a constant.

The door swung open and a burst of light filled the room. “They have 20 minutes so you better start praying.” He slid a plate of food over towards you and threw a bottle of water in your general direction “lets hope your brother cares about you more than you think. And please don’t make a mess,


“They want proof that we’ll send the money. We’ve got 10 minutes Hotch we need to do something" Morgan’s gaze shifted from Hotch to Spencer getting increasingly worried with each moment passing.

“Hotch! Why the fuck aren’t you doing anything? You said this was like a normal case and if that was true we wouldn’t be wasting all this time and we would be paying the money!” Spencer yelled at Hotch his eyes full of fear and anger.

“Wait for my cue and then send this.” Hotch sent a picture to Garcia’s computer just as the counter ticked down to 1.00.


“What is this?”


“Send it Garcia” Spencer yelled at the blonde.


Garcia’s tears slipped down her cheeks as Hotch waited.

45 “Send it Garcia for fuck sake send” Morgan pushed Spencer out of the room and closed the door behind them.

28 “Hotch…”


“Do it!” Garcia sent the document with 5 seconds to spare. The website switched to a video link; just as Spencer burst back through the door.

“What happened? Did you send it? Is she safe?” His eyes bounced between the screen and the faces of his team. “We sent it. The video hasn’t been posted yet but I imagine it’ll tell us what happens next. For now, Spencer unless you can get it together you can’t work this case.”

“Not gunna happen Hotch.” His face was still and angry, a face none of them had seen on him before.


“It looks like they’re going to pay. But we don’t want the money, we want them. So, we won’t be taking your sight but we’re going to try and tempt them here. This camera here is going to broadcast this onto the website we have sent them. Penelope Garcia might be able to trace it but by that time we’d be all set up and gone. Anyway…” he moved close to your hand, the restraints made it impossible to move away. The camera began to beep and they all pulled on their masks  “As you’re right handed I will start with the left. Little finger?” your eyes shot open, you shook you head and tried to scream though the gag muffled any noise that tried to escape.

I’ve gotten many private messages about this so I’m going to make a post, here’s my two cents about the plane situation:

I’ve never really understood why this specific piece of information creates so much drama, I know people want OT4 (or at least Harry and Louis) to travel together but separating bands is extremely common:

  • Usually bands travel separately for security reasons.
  • They also travel separately because they have different schedules (I don’t think that’s the case here but it happens).
  • They need more than one plane anyway because it’s not just the four of them: even if part of the crew flights in earlier to set the stage, there’s still the rest of the crew, staff, families, friends, personal assistants, security…
  • They all work together, they spend good part of the day (and year) together so travelling apart by plane or car for a few minutes/hours is not going to change anything in their dynamics or relationship.

I understand people want to see unity and you’re allowed to feel whatever you want but I wanted to say that it’s really not that weird or shady, they’re definitely not the only ones doing it.