anyforty&family

10

Natural hair guru Whitney White (Naptural85) and her family

“My husband and I definitely look to instill self-confidence in our daughter, Olivia, and that includes everything from how she looks, to how she thinks, behaves and learns. But I want her to also know that her hair doesn’t define her and it’s okay to switch up your look. She can express herself however she wants as long as she knows that she was born beautiful and will always be naturally beautiful.” (x)

Hello, I’m Erika and I’m a 21 year old disabled trans lesbian and I’m trying to move to Portland for the long term to escape my abusive family.

My family overwhelm me with emotional abuse, trying to suffocate me with the image of who they wish I was, but if I try to be that person, it’s gonna kill me. Being physically disabled, I can’t do physical labor or exercise because it causes unbearable amounts of pain in my body that keep me bedbound if I’m forced into that labor or I do too much exercise. My family would always push me beyond my physical limits and it caused tremendous pain in my body. This, along with my neurodivergence, meant I faced a shitload of ableist abuse and hostile environments from my family never respecting my boundaries or limits.

They treat me as a burden to drain of emotional labor and they make a big deal out of the care I need.

I’m a trans woman and my family never stops misgendering me, saying a shitload of transmisogynistic jokes, pushing me to be someone I’m not, and a general tidal wave of transmisogyny that is really hard to survive in. It’s really fucked over my mental health, being with them, and I really need a space of my own where my family isn’t violently forcing gender upon me.

They never respected me being a lesbian, especially a trans lesbian, and they always guilt-tripped me and tried to force me into some hetero nuclear nightmare, that frankly, I can never be and I don’t want to be forced into that.

One of my family members escalated and physically assaulted me and I’ve seen the same red flags I saw in my physical abuser in another family member. If I can’t escape them permanently, I won’t survive the long term.

If I can move elsewhere permanently and cut them out of my life, I’ll finally be able to rebuild my life and grow in ways not dictated by my family. I have quite a few friends in the northwest area of the US so I’m going to try to move to Portland for the long term. Right now, I’m looking for long term housing and a job in Portland and until I have a sustainable source of income, I’m pretty much relying on my savings but if I run out before I have a job, I’m really fucked.

The money here would help tremendously with things like:

If you donate, I’ll try to get you some goodies:

(message me if you want one of these things after you donate):

If you’re interested, I’m willing to sell naked photos and videos of myself too but privately message me so we can talk about what you’re interested in and the price.

If you’re against systems of power, against systems of oppression, if you support people who’ve been hurt by them, like poor people, trans women, lesbians, disabled people, please help me out by donating, whether that’s a lot or a little, your contribution will help me escape my family permanently and survive.

One of Our Own Needs Help

SPN Family!

One of our own is really struggling right now and can really use our help. She’s in danger of losing her condo and she’s desperately reaching out to us for help to #AlwaysKeepFighting!!!

Please check out her Go Fund Me page “Jen’s Home” and if you can spare a little for her, please, PLEASE do! She’s been in the fandom since season one, many of you might even know her Livejournal, and she’s been struggling with depression for years. Her home is her sanctuary, and losing it will devastate her. Now is a perfect time for a Random Act of Kindness to one of our own to help her make it!!

Thank you so much for your consideration!!

9

Severus’ first day of school ever.

The “survival kit” had tissues and chocolate, which I loved. And then I read the poem which was cute up until “This is no way to behave” and then I stopped reading it.

Please, for the love of candy corn, stop telling parents not to show an emotion that isn’t pride or happiness in front of their children. Teaching really works! Teach your children about emotions, why you’re feeling them and they will get it. They will understand. Me, knowing myself, I told Sev yesterday that I would cry - and he already knew that, because he knows me too. I told him that my tears are not tears of upset or sadness, but of joy, excitement and some worry. I told him that he didn’t need to be concerned, that we would both have a great day and asked him to be brave.

So today, when he stood in line with his classmates, he looked back at me and saw the tears streaming down my face and he smiled at me. He gave me a thumbs up, which I returned, and then he followed his teacher out of the cafeteria. When I picked him up I asked his teacher how his first day was and she said he was great, in fact, the words “I LOVE HIM!” were the first she ever spoke to me, and there were no tears from him at all.

I have cried at every first day - including the ones I didn’t get to be a part of - and so far, none of my children have come running after me or attached themselves to my ankles and refused to follow their teachers out of my presence.

Making a “scene”, I get. If I throw myself after my child and loudly wail in a corner, please, escort me to some sanity and composure. Otherwise, take a seat. I’m leaving my child in this building for 6+ hours, every weekday, after spending near every day by his side since his damn conception. I’m not a robot, nerves of steel are not my forte’, and I am not going to apologize.