any beer

CRAZY-EX GIRLFRIEND SENTENCE STARTERS.
feel free to change up pronouns or wording to better suit your muse!

  • ❝ i did not move here for him. ❞ 
  • ❝ speaking of flash points, you’re really blowing my mind right now. ❞ 
  • ❝ what’ll it be? ❞
  • ❝ i’d like a beer, please. any kind. ❞
  • ❝ never order alcohol again. ❞
  • ❝ i felt warm, like glitter was exploding inside me. ❞
  • ❝ i’m having a manic episode. ❞
  • ❝ it was a shit show. ❞
  • ❝ oh my god, i think i like you. ❞
  • ❝ she’s got one of them secret boot-ays. ❞ 
  • ❝ a kiss on the cheek means… everything. ❞
  • ❝ you’re a breeder, not a leader. ❞
  • ❝ i’m a both-sexual. ❞ 
  • ❝ you’re pretty and you’re smart and you’re ignoring me, so you’re obviously my type. ❞ 
  • ❝ ok, well, let’s not knock someone for a fetish. ❞
  • ❝ he’s suspiciously good-looking in ways that normal people are not. ❞
  • ❝ my father didn’t leave me. ❞ 
  • ❝ this is what happy feels like. ❞ 
  • ❝ look at all my friends! ❞ 
  • ❝ it’s my gateway drug. ❞
  • ❝ it’s not a drug, it’s a potato. ❞
  • ❝ she is smoking! ❞ 
  • ❝ i woke up like this. ❞
  • ❝ women gotta stick together. ❞
  • ❝ my name’s ____. i just said it. ❞ 
  • ❝ why should we root for someone straight, male and white? ❞
  • ❝ i need to use the bathroom… again! ❞
  • ❝ we make quite a pair. ❞
  • ❝ should i be giggling right now? ❞
  • ❝ i’m so much better than you. ❞
  • ❝ wow. i can’t believe it took us that long to come to the most obvious solution! ❞
  • ❝ to be clear, your parents wanna have sex with me. ❞
  • ❝ weirdly, this isn’t about you. ❞
  • ❝ you reward failure. ❞
  • ❝ you make a difference in the world and you make all the difference in the world to me. ❞
MM Characters At A Bar
  • Jumin: "you're telling me you don't have Pinot JuHan Noir aged for 279 years? This is rubbish and I am telling father."
  • Jaehee: "yeah, but do you sell coffee? Any caffeine?"
  • Zen: "beer. I don't care what kind, just get me some asap."
  • Yoosung: "I'd love a Shirley temple. What? You don't have those...mmh, a virgin daiquiri?"
  • 707: "could I have one of those fancy umbrellas? Yes, thank you. This is for my PhD Pepper can. Don't worry about it, big guy."
  • (BONUS)
  • Saeran: "anything to get me drunk within two chugs."
  • V: "excuse me, sir, is this the bar on Mystic Street? No? You're telling me I walked into a 9 year old's birthday party?"

You know what? Fuck it, fuck the whole Maya becoming the master for the fucking asshole Fey clan with their bullshit traditions that have caused nothing but suffering for her and Mia and Pearl.

After Bridge to the Turnabout Maya goes to TOKYO.

She meets REI HINO (it’s after Stars idk I can do what I want shut up)

Her and Maya become BUSINESS PARTNERS because of MUTUAL BENEFIT of having weirdo powers of psychicness-channeling.

MAYA IS NOW FRIENDS WITH ALL THE SAILOR SENSHI.

Also Maya and Franziska are in a long-distance relationship so when Franziska comes to visit SHE IS ALSO FRIENDS WITH THE SENSHI. (well “friends” is a relative term for Franziska) (let’s face it she probably whips Usagi a lot) (Rei stops her … eventually) (she stopped whipping Minako on her own when she realized she … well . . LIKED it)

THIS IS CANON NOW, YOU CAN’T STOP ME, FUCKERS. MY CITY NOW.

I had no plans to consume any beers tonight..

But after the shitstorm that I have been dealing with today here at work, I am so picking up some bombers on the way home.

notes on the HIMYM/BtVS crossover no one asked for

- Buffy is Not Allowed in any bet where slaps are on the line.

- this is because the first time she gave Barney a love tap, tiny little bump on the cheek, and he said, “what is that? that is weaksauce, Summers, hit me with everything you’ve got.” And then there was a hole in the wall.

- Robin and Spike are Bros. They hang out on street corners and drink cheap Canadian beer (Spike will drink any beer and is mildly surprised the normals object, like, what, it’s beer, right?) and smoke cigarettes and sometimes they get in fights with teenagers. They fistbump, they have inside jokes, and sometimes it seems like she is encouraging him to maybe just maybe consider taking up blood-drinking again because there’s this one lady at her office…

- Spike is like 75% sure she’s joking. 65%. But he’s still super suspicious of this Patrice person.

- Marshall and Buffy are also super bros. He teared up when she gave him his first halberd for his birthday. Sometimes they wear matching historically inaccurate horned helmets because he had one and Lily was all, “babe, that-s not a real historical thing, you know this right?” and Buffy was like, “I dunno, I like hats that double as weapons” and Marshall did a little victory dance right there in the living room in his helmet.

- Spike and Angel correct Ted all the time. About everything. Ted glowers.

Going in dry.

One of the things I did at the beginning of 2016 was make myself a little checklist of things I wanted to accomplish for me throughout the year. I had 5 things on the list, and I’d say I accomplished nearly everything on the list. One of the things I’d say I am half way there on.

As 2016 moved along, I greatly decreased my beer intake. I plan on moving even further on this. Basically, I am not gonna buy beer any more, save for certain situations (going to Comic Con as an example), otherwise, that’s it. This is something I want to do for me, and really, I see no problem with me doing this.

anonymous asked:

So, crap timing as you've just left, but could I get a couple While In London recs? Will be there for five days with (after plane tickets and hotel) not much fun-money. Staying right by the Victoria & Albert, and mostly planning to wander the city alternately drinking tea and beer. Any Must Drink/Eat/Sees? (Also, do you think there will be such a thing as a mellow pub on New Years?)

Hello friend. So, there is a load of fun stuff to do in London that’s free or cheap. If you’re staying right by the V&A, I would highly recommend hitting the Records & Rebels exhibit (which is only fifteen quid and very cool). The rest of the museum is free! Obviously seeing the Globe is kind of a must. There’s nothing on outside right now because it’s too damn cold, but you can still go on the tour (again, for about fifteen quid) and it really is worth it. Most of the guides really know their stuff. Entrance to the British Library is free and there are some pretty stellar things to see in there for a book nerd. As for must drink, if you’re a wine person, hit up Gordon’s and the Cork & Bottle (hard to find but totally worth it). If you’re a whiskey drinker, Millroy’s. If you’re a beer-swiller, well, you can get beer pretty much anywhere. If you want some truly fabulous and not too pricey English pub food, go to Covent Garden and hit up Battersea Pie Station, and while you’re in the area take a wander down Charing Cross Road, because that’s where all the used bookshops are. If you feel like going on another little adventure, Persephone Books is also a great place to stop. If you are a music junkie like me, definitely stop at Reckless Records and Sister Ray, which are, conveniently, right across the street from each other. If you’re more of a vintage/thrift shop/flea market person, take a stroll down Brick Lane on a Sunday. Bonus: Brewdog is right around the corner. 

Hope this helps! Other London suggestions are here and here

this is soso so late i think but i got an idea for @felicityash and @calgasms pregnancy/daddy blurb night !! it also may have some fire fighter!calum and also be inspired by the jonas brothers show

Every night, Calum would come home in a pair of sweat pants and a tank top. He would kick his shoes off by the door and kick them next to the side table. even though he had done so at the department,he would follow his usual routine of taking a shower. Dinner would be ready when he got out and on his way into the kitchen to eat he would grab two beers from the fridge, pop the cap off on the counter and kiss you on the forehead. Tonight would be different though, Calum wouldn’t shower or open any beers or kiss you on the forehead because he wasn’t going to be there.

You knew he wouldn’t, you called the station minutes after he hadn’t arrived home and they confirmed your suspicions; there was another big fire that would probably take all night to put out. What you weren’t expecting was for Calum to  not return until the next afternoon, soot and ash smudged against his skin and a tired look on his face. You instantly started running him a bath. You lit the candles scattered around your bathroom and made sure to drop in a bath bomb. Calum was still standing in the living room when you returned from the bathroom.

His shoes were kicked off his feet and you knew he wasn’t going to touch the couches to avoid getting them stained. He didn’t say anything as you pulled him into the bathroom and undressed him, the silence continued until he was in the bath and you were walking out of the room. “Could you stay? And get in?” Calum’s voice was soft as he reached his arm out and he pulled you into him after you undressed.

His arms were wrapped tight around you as he let his head rest against your shoulder. He was completely at peace when during moments like this. They didn’t come too often; you going to college and him fighting fires and training didn’t leave as much time as either of you would like. Nights like last night scared you both, thinking you may not see the other if he couldn’t get someone out of a fire or if it got too out of control.

Once the water started getting too cold for comfort, you pulled the drain. Neither of you made any move to get out until you sat up to pull to shower door shut and turn the shower on. “I guess we should get you cleaned up, yeah?”

Calum gave no vocal response but the slight smile on his lips was enough for you to pull down the shower head and move to sit behind him. You took your time washing his back and massaging his shoulders before moving onto his hair. It was getting long and you knew he would be cutting it off soon. You spent time tangling your fingers into his curls and scratching his scalp just the slightest bit. His head would fall back when you told him it’s time to rinse and with one hand you would hold the shower head, and the other was put to use combing the bubbles out of his hair.

Calum would hand you the conditioner when you asked for it and lean into you while you played with the curls you weren’t used to running your hands through. After spending the same amount of time on the rest of him, he would wash you off and wrap each other in the fuzzy towels. You immediately go towards the kitchen after pulling on one of Calum’s shirts and start dinner. It was early but you knew he would want to eat as soon as possible and then sleep for as long as possible, all with you by his side.

When you called him for dinner and he didn’t come running, you went to look for him. He wasn’t in the living room or your bedroom. The only place left would be the bathroom. Calum was sitting on the floor, staring at the pale stick on the floor. His legs were spread out and the test was between them, the bright pink lines too obvious against the white. “I guess the cats out of the bag?” He looked at you when you spoke and you could see how his eyes were glossed over.

“You’re pregnant? With a baby? With our baby?” He asked, his voice barely a whisper as he stood up. You nodded slowly, afraid of how he would react. He moved before you could say anything else and his arms were almost crushing you before he stopped and dropped to his knees. “Hi baby, it’s your daddy. You don’t even here me because you don’t have ears, but it’s me and I’m excited to have you buddy.” He looked up at you this time, “So, so excited.”

St. Patrick’s Day (2017)

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Get ready to show your Irish pride by raising a pint to St. Patrick’s Day! Check-in to any beer between March 17th - 19th and you’ll unlock the all new “St. Patrick’s Day (2017)” badge! Whether you’re cracking open the rarest beer in your cellar or enjoying a pint of something green, may the luck of the Irish be with you!

i’ve literally listened to so much depeché that they feel like family members and szeksuelle songs start feeling weird like “lmao uncle you’re so wild shut up !!! nobody wanna hear about your business like that !!! nobody let uncle martin drink any more beers pls….”

anonymous asked:

If you could have a beer with any scientist, living or dead, in the world, which scientist would it be? And what would you ask them?

Niels Bohr. Because he got a free house and lifetime supply of beer for winning the nobel prize. And i’d ask him about how it feels like to have a lifetime supply of beer. 

(i don’t like beer, i prefer hard stuff) 

anonymous asked:

Bros crush being able to out drink them? Idk but I'd imagine it'd be pretty funny bc the bros seem to hold their liquor pretty well

Osomatsu would be shocked - he thought he could hold his liquor well, but you drink him under the table! He’d be proud and congratulate you for your “winning achievement.” He’d try to have drinking contests with you whenever possible.

Karamatsu would be… utterly surprised, to say the least. He’d praise you on your talent. (That’s when he remembers that he doesn’t drink that often, and then it all clicks.)

Choromatsu is a lightweight, but he won’t admit that. When you manage to outdrink him, he gets offended that you can even do that, but only because he’s in denial.

Ichimatsu knows he doesn’t drink that much, preferring sodas over beer any day, but he’d still be astonished that you can drink so much. How do you do it? The world may never know.

It’s… hard to outdrink Jyushimatsu, to say the least. If you can manage to pull it off, he’d be so proud of you! He’d toss you into the air and praise you for your capabilities.

Todomatsu would be fiesty if you could could pull that off. When you actually accomplish it in front of him, he gets really emotional and says that it isn’t fair. When he gets drunk, he gets emotional. You’ll have to help him.