anxious moms

urgh i’m so annoyed like, did sigmund freud even read oedipus before dumping his flaming bag of dogshit theory upon the world where unfortunately it remains to this day??? oedipus didn’t know the woman he married was his mother. he didn’t sleep with her because she was his mother. and when he found out he wasn’t like “oh well i guess i have a mommy kink now” he was so distraught he literally stabbed his eyes out. fuck freud is what i’m saying

I remember driving down the Cincinnati roads to that hospital. My heart beating out of my chest, my sweaty hands holding the flowers I bought you so closely to my chest. For reasons I don’t know I was nervous, maybe because I didn’t want to see you, battered up in a hospital bed. Maybe I was scared you wouldn’t be okay. Maybe I was just anxious to meet your mom for the first time.
I remember sitting next to you while you laid in that hospital bed. You were in so much pain, I just held your cold beaten hands and told you I loved you. That everything was going to be okay. The room was dense and I felt choked by it, choked by the smell of the hospital and the smell of you, the combination making me sick to my stomach.
Months later I let go of that same hand, I was letting go of you. I was so scared to lose you when your life flashed before your eyes but I ended up losing you anyway. Not because of a tragic accident, but because of me. I chose that, after it was my biggest fear, after sobbing in the bathroom while my parents asked me to just tell them what was wrong. After the night I didn’t sleep at all because I didn’t know if I was ever going to see you again. And then, after some time had passed, I just let go. So easily. I let you slip from my grasp when I was used to holding on so tightly.
And then, you were gone.
—  v.m

chrt-jiang  asked:

question for a fic: if dallas had a panic attack, would he ever let someone take his binder off if he couldn't do it himself? also are there people he doesn't wear a binder around cos he feels comfy enough with them? thankie thankie in advance!!

!!!!!! Hope this is Okay to publish 

at first he was only comfortable with it around Poppy, she’s just? Her presence is just “things are gonna be okay”. His panic attacks would be his face heating up, and since summer is Fast Approaching, binding make his body temp hotter than it should be, breathing harder, so Poppy would be the one who would follow Dallas to the locker room and take it Carefully Off. I think he wouldn’t be opposed to Malek taking it off for him but he’d be thoroughly embarrassed once he’s calm enough to process what’s happened, since Dallas never really mastered how to carefully remove your binder with Grace. When he’s come out, he’s probably comfy going sans binder with Malek. There’s this image of Malek turning around while Dallas is worming and struggling on the floor, trying to take off the thing. Every now and then, Malek would ask, “you sure you don’t need help, buddy?” 

why does Dallas worm the binder off? He doesn’t want to excessively stretch them out too much, even though his mom’s never batted an eyelash at their price, He Gets Anxious when his mom spends too much on him. So he refuses to remove it via waist. He pulls it over his arms, trying not to get stuck and it’s always a struggle that ends with him on his back on the floor, chest out and his dogs staring down at him, concerned. When Malek is there, back rigidly turned, he says, half laughing “I’m just imagining you’re like Frodo trapped in Shelob’s web. Maybe you need me, Malekwise Solhgee to help?”

also, if Malek helps him taking it off, he’d be all “remember?? Now I’m just thinking of you. Drowned in moonlight. Strangled by his own binder.”

If you feel like a bad fish parent...

…just look up betta aquascapes or bettas in general on google images. Many are fantastic, don’t get me wrong, but there’s a good portion that I can at-a-glance tell are literally 0.5-1.5 gallon unheated, unfiltered containers (barely worthy of being called tanks). Some are decently sized tanks… but they have so many dividers that they look like someone’s trying to keep 4+ fish in a 5-gallon (I have ONE fish in a 5-gal, for comparison). Some are “scaped” with plants blocking out all the fish’s oxygen. It’s stuff lots of people have done/seen before, but all the same, yikes!

If that bothers you, then you can be pretty sure that you’re probably doing ok. Your fish is probably not in such a situation because you know better. If your fish died from fish diseases or because you missed or messed up a water change, well, at least it didn’t die in a half-gallon bowl with once weekly water changes and no filter or heater. You probably tried really hard to save them and learned from your mistakes, so again, you’re doing ok. If your fish is in an undersized bowl and doesn’t have proper care, but you just stumbled upon bettablr and are realizing with concern that you’ve been taught wrong by all the pet stores you’ve ever bought fish from, breathe, get a bigger tank and a filter and a heater and safe decor. Learn about cycling tanks and how often to do water changes. You’re doing ok if you’re open to learning and changing. I promise.

Obviously this is geared towards bettas since that’s what I know about but hey, uninformed people take poor care of all kinds of fish, freshwater and saltwater. If you’re doing your absolute best to learn and grow as a fishkeeper, excellent job. Even if your entire system crashed and you’re scrambling to save what fish you can, breathe, you’re doing your best. Keep learning. You’ll get there.

This has been a PSA from a constantly anxious betta mom & her often-sick water wiggle.

ash-is-boss  asked:

Speaking of future husbands, my mom knew right away that my dad was going to be her husband (even though she has a horrible past when it comes to guys). So it makes me feel like YEAH THATS WHATS GONNA HAPPEN TO ME TOO but what if I miss him because I'm assuming I'll know right away? It makes me so anxious. (my mom even said she had a dream about MY future husband but she doesn't really remember anything specific... But I've never had that kind of dream.)

A lot of people I’ve talked to said that when they met their husbands, they KNEW. One of my friend’s friends posted his engagement photo on Facebook with a story that when he first saw his fiancé, God told him that was his wife. There are extraordinary cases like that.

And then there are my parents. Dad was a year younger than Mom and she only agreed to go out with him so he’d stop freaking ASKING omg. He’d come see her at her high school in his middle school uniform and it was so embarrassing wow.

But they kept fighting and breaking up, fighting and breaking up. Then Dad was A Looker, y'know, and all these girls had ideas about him, but my mother was SO PETTY that whenever some other girl started paying attention to him she’d figuratively snap her fingers and Dad would go running back to her.

(Mom was a bad ass. She dated a guy who threatened to beat her and she was like COME HERE AND HIT ME THEN, WHATCHA WAITING FOR?! He never did.)

So Mom and Dad’s little soap opera went on for like twelve years before they finally got married. And then they almost got divorced. But they stuck it out and have been together ever since, and now whenever Mom sees Dad’s old flames on Facebook she laughs at how ugly they are and says she’s gonna flaunt him in their faces.

The point is, there are different kinds of relationships, so you should just pray about it and let God’s plan unfold. ouo;;;

anonymous asked:

)Anxious Birdie) You guyyyyyysssss, My mom might validate and accept my autism soon!!!!!My grandma has been living with us since December and she has a bunch of weird thug that she does (like routine, not being in touch with her emotions, taking things literally, I think you see where I'm going with this) and my mom was talking to me about her weird things she does and I was like "hey mom, y'know, she could be autistic" and my mom looked it up (autistic parent) and was reading the article (pt 1)

(Anxious birdie) so my mom was reading the article about autistic parents and my grandma matched up with LITERALLY EVERYTHING. And my mom told me a few months ago about how my uncle used to do autistic things like rocking back and forth to try to go to sleep and soothe himself and he didn’t have many friends and a bunch of other stuff. (Also my grandma is on my mom side along with my uncle) and I told my mom “y'know, autism is genetic a lot of the time” and she was like “really?” (Pt 2)

(Anxious Birdie) and I was like “yes mom!” And so she went online and took one of those online “do you have autism?” tests. And she took it pretending to be my grandma and she got half neurotypical and half neurodivergent traits. Then my mom took it as herself and got 83 neurodivergent traits out of 200 (so she’s mostly neurotypical) and then she made me take it and I got like 159 out of 200 neurodivergent traits. Which is awesome!!! And my mom was like hmmmm. So she might accept me soon! (Pt 3)