anw :(

Reasons why American Ninja Warrior is 100% Good and Pure
  • Awesome outfits
  • No fighting involved, despite the name
  • Everybody cheers for everybody
  • Men and women compete on the same course on equal footing
  • Even the best competitors fail, and take it in stride
  • “Akbar Gbaja-Biamila” rolls off the tongue in a pleasant way
  • You’re only competing against the course and yourself
  • SUPER FUN OBSTACLES
  • Holy shit how are these people doing any of this
  • The way Matt Iseman says “A-MER-i-can NINjaaaa WAAAAARrior.”
  • When you wipe out the worst that happens is you get wet
  • Adorable parents, kids and SOs in matching t-shirts on the sidelines, cheering
  • Many ripped and bare-chested men
  • Many ripped and goddess-like women
  • Badass competitors with day jobs like weatherman, flight attendant, and FedEx delivery driver
  • All the other athletes are SUPER PSYCHED when someone does awesomely
  • Kids with sparkly signs in the bleachers
  • The hosts shouting semi-incoherently when someone’s Killing It on the course
  • Successful competitors using their notoriety to start up foundations and help kids
  • So many long-haired hippie rock climbing types
  • Akbar’s infinite well of Dad Jokes
  • People who DIY up Ninja obstacle courses in their backyards or gyms
  • Only one sponsor, and they just want you to drink some pomegranate juice
4

I adopted aro ace ritsu hc literally only to make this joke

5

when ppl ask why do you have three rings on ur ring finger and you’re like “I have three husbands, duh!”

8

They’d been so close to each other, but they ended that friendship.

have a nice day luigi

Sometimes he woke up in the middle of the night, startled by something. Might be his dreams, might not. He didn’t remember enough of them to tell.

What he remembered of them usually went like this:

He woke up alone. Statics filled the air. The streets buzzed. The punches never came, and he just walked the streets until he was on the ground, in front of an alleyway. The dusty lamppost stood between him and the entrance. The light flickered the way usual household light bulbs did, but slower.

Then he woke up, alone, the newest podcast playing on loop in his ears. The light was always off.

It really wasn’t much to go by.

even more bc it has to run its course