Feminists love to talk about how terrible life is for women, because of men. They act like women all get along, we NEVER hurt each other. We’re just one big sisterhood, and it’s peace and love all around. Well I got two instances to the contrary.
In middle school I got made fun of, a lot. The way I dressed, the way I acted and the way I talked. All scrutinized by the “popular kids”, the majority of whom were girls. I still remember how they would scrunch their faces when they judged the way I dressed, or point out that I talked like I had marbles in my mouth. I remember them saying my khaki skirts looked like puke, calling me white and a nerd, basically making fun of me at every chance they got. They say guys are the reason why girls feel self-conscious about the way they look, but they fail to mention how nasty and judgemental girls can be.
In the fourth grade I was sexually harassed in the bathroom of my school. I had gone to the bathroom during class, and when I got there there was just one other girl already there. She didn’t seem to be doing anything in particular, so I had gone into one of the stalls. I was using the bathroom when I looked up to see her, staring at me from over the door. I was scared, and asked her to stop. I immediately got out and she began asking me questions about sex, and if I knew what it was and if I wanted to do it. I kept saying no, I didn’t want to do it. She kept persisting, pulling my hand over to a corner of the bathroom out of view of the doorway before I just fell silent, slid to the floor in a ball and started crying. She got frustrated and left. Eventually my teacher noticed I was gone for a long time and sent someone to check on me. They brought me back to class, and for the rest of the day I just had my head on my desk, crying, refusing to talk to anybody. It wasn’t until I got home that I told my mom, who immediately brought it to the attention of the school. From then on, they always sent people to the bathroom in pairs. I’ve only told this story to 2 people since. But feminists LOVE to gloss over or even completely dismiss the fact that girls and women can rape and sexually harass other women and girls.
I may not have terrible horror stories like some people do of the ways women can be horrible people too, but trust me, they do exist. They’re just as impactful and should not be just swept under the rug as if they are not as legitimate as when a man does it.
i get that you’re tentative to use the word ‘feminist’ because some people who claim the title of ‘feminist’ are misandrists or faking it (for whatever reason). so this is a reminder that anyone who thinks men are trash, pigs, or otherwise unequal to women ARE NOT FEMINISTS. and that them claiming the name ‘feminist’ does not change the definition of the word.
similarly, if you are pro-equality, you already are a feminist. and rejecting the name doesn’t change this. this is how words work. truths are true whether you accept them or not.
please do not let the common misrepresentation (and resulting misinterpretation) of feminism spoil your view of what really is a good thing.
ps. you dont have to be pro choice to be a feminist. the only requirement is wanting equality of the genders.
Yes, I’m an anti-feminist. No not just to impress men, nor do I have “internalized misogyny”, neither do I hate other women.
I am an anti-feminist because modern feminism is quite frankly a joke that suffers from a perpetual victim complex and brands all men as rapists, misogynists and homophobes, and all women who don’t agree with feminism as brainwashed idiots who can’t think for themselves.
Conservative antifeminist women and men insist that feminism is destroying family life. They argue that working women leave households bereft of homemakers and children without a mother’s care. Yet they consistently ignore the degree to which consumer capitalist culture, not feminism, pushed women into the workforce and keeps them there.
bell hooks, The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love (2004)
I hear the antifeminist argument that women aren’t equal to men because they don’t fight in wars (or haven’t until recently) and I would just like to point out that we aren’t the ones that decided to keep women out of wars.
That was men.
Men decided we weren’t strong enough to be soldiers even though we birthed them.
Men decided we weren’t wise enough to be commanders even though we raised them.
Historically women have been disguising themselves as men to fight along side them. This is a fact. This has always happened. Always. Now, at least, women who wish to join a military branch can but they are still fairly limited in their duty choices.
If you’re upset because you’re more likely to die in a war than a woman, that is not the woman’s fault. Look to your fellow men.