anti banks

10

TAURUSQUEER’S TOP TEN ALBUMS OF 2016

1. Lemonade - Beyonce

I think this album should be atop of everyone’s 2016 list. Lemonade has quickly become not only my favorite Beyoncé album, but one of my favorite albums of all time. Beyoncé successfully moves across genres, most notably reclaiming rock & roll and country to their black origins.

2. My Woman - Angel Olsen

To be honest, before the release of My Woman, I had no idea who Angel was. But, this album has most definitely put her on my radar in the future. Angel provides a sort of psychedelic rock sound reminiscent of the ‘60s, and covers the topic of love with such emotion that it is tear-jerking.

3. Puberty 2 - Mitski

Mitski is another artist that I have just discovered this year, and I’m so glad I did. Appropriately titled Puberty 2 for its hormonal nature, the album covers topics such as love, mental health, and societal norms. Another definite tear-jerker.

4. A Seat at the Table - Solange

With this album, Solange further proves her creativity as an Alt/R&B artist. She asserts black pride and describes her struggles with depression on “Cranes in the Sky”. A Seat at the Table solidifies Solange’s place as an individual in the music industry, not to be compared with her older sister.

5. Dangerous Woman - Ariana Grande

Dangerous Woman is Ariana’s most daring release to date and definitely my personal favorite. Permanently shedding her image as “the girl from Victorious”, Ariana delivers a cohesive, sexy, and feel-good dance/pop album with emotional moments such as “Thinking Bout You”.

6. Emotion: Side-B - Carly Rae Jepsen

Who else could release a nearly flawless pop album full of B-sides? The queen of modern ‘80s pop sound really outdoes herself with this one and proves that her critically acclaimed 2015 release “Emotion” was no fluke.

7. Lady Wood - Tove Lo

With Lady Wood, Tove Lo once again provides honest lyricism about sex and love accompanied by atmospheric production. Tove keeps it simple (no pun intended) while still remaining effortlessly edgy. It definitely deserves more recognition than it has gotten.

8. Glory - Britney Spears

The princess of pop has provided her loyal fans with her best release since “Circus”. Britney stays true to herself while delivering an album that keeps up with the times in its production and lyrics.

9. Nightride - Tinashe

While this is just a mixtape for the fans to listen to while they wait for the release of her sophomore album, it is still one of my favorite releases of the year. Tinashe pairs a soft hip/hop sound with thoughtful lyrics that makes for great music to relax to. 

10. Anti - Rihanna

The final spot was the hardest to choose, but Rihanna definitely deserves it. Delivering her best album to date, Rihanna transcends genres from Alt/R&B (“Same Ol’ Mistakes” & “Yeah I Said It”) to Pop (“Kiss it Better” & “Work”)

Honorable Mentions:

Blonde - Frank Ocean, The Altar - Banks, The Colour In Anything - James Blake, Joanne - Lady Gaga, Vroom Vroom (EP) - Charli XCX, For All We Know - NAO, Glory Days - Little Mix, Starboy - The Weeknd, and Tkay - Tkay Maidza

The result [of nealiberalism] today is a paradox. At the same time that the nation has achieved perhaps the most tolerant culture in U.S. history, the destruction of the anti-monopoly and anti-bank tradition in the Democratic Party has also cleared the way for the greatest concentration of economic power in a century.
4

SIDESHOW: Sometimes there are other ideas that I think would be awesome. So think of these as guest blog entries from other sections of my brain.

This is from a Tumblr that doesn’t exist called Emma Goldman Sachs. All captions are quotes by famed anti-capitalist activist Emma Goldman

Azealia Breaks: How to Lose It All With A Tweet.

written by Jayshana Roper

Late Tuesday night social media exploded with yet another beef involving the infamous Azealia Banks. FUZEDmagazine would like to say that she makes music, but Banks is primarily known for her erratic twitter posts, and flip flopping between social justice crusader, and haphazard bigot. This time, her bigotry has led her into a not-so-heated twitter battle with 14-year-old actress, Skai Jackson, and costed her a headline show in London.

The incident in question begins with Zayn Malik and his video for Like I Would. Banks created an Instagram post alluding to the idea that Malik was biting her style. The former One Direction star then kindly took to twitter to clear that up.


External image

Banks’ rebuttal consisted of a blatant bashing of middle eastern and muslim people. She continually calls Malik racial slurs, like sand n*gger. In the explosive rant Banks also tells Malik that he tries to emulate the black culture he learned from white boys, and that his family was wiped out by the USA.


External image

If that bit of tea is warm, the resulting tea will scald your tongue.

Skai Jackson, best known for her Disney roles and internet memes, responded to Banks’ cruelty and ignorance with a simple tweet saying that Banks should “simmer down.”


External image

At this point, one would imagine that all hell would break loose. Unpredictable Azealia combined with teenage angst seems like an explosive combination. However, though Banks sent a disrespectful response to young Miss Jackson:


External image

The young star maintained her composure: asserting that she, at 14-years-old, has more class than 24-year-old Banks. It is at this point that things get embarrassing. Banks attempts to drag Skai Jackson by making multiple tweets about the state of her career, and her “abusive stage mom”.


External image

In response to these inflammatory remarks Skai’s mother, Kiya Cole, had this to say:


External image

To make matters even worse, these excessive twitter rants caused Banks to lose her headline for London’s Rinse FM’s Born and Bred Festivsal, and to get her Twitter account suspended! Azalea Banks continually reminds us to think before we speak, and to seek medical attention for mental distress. Now that she cannot tweet her rivals, one can only wonder how Banks will be addressing her future beef.


External image

Okay but imagine Llamas With Hats but with Anti as Carl and Darkiplier as Paul.

Anti: Dark? Are ya home?
Anti: Ding-dong.
Anti: Landlord!
Anti: Chipotle delivery!
Anti: Housekeeping!
Anti: Bank manager! You have an appointment!
Dark: What do you want, Anti?
Anti: I want to be treated like a friend, Dark.
Dark: We’re not friends anymore.
Anti: Didn’t you get my apology trumpet?
Dark: Trumpets aren’t supposed to bleed and scream.
Anti: I guess it was less a trumpet and more a statement on trumpets.
Dark: Why can’t you go horrify someone else, Anti.
Anti: I miss your squishy face. And the Dark mask I made hasn’t helped. It’s not squish enough.
Dark: You made a mask of my face?
Anti: Yes and speaking of which you might want to avoid being seen by federal investigators.
Dark: Anti…
Anti: To some, you are now known as Wilford Warfstache brutal leader of the South Korean opium cartel.
Dark: Go home, Anti, I’m calling the police.
Anti: Bad Idea, Wilford. And you know there’s no prison I can’t wiggle my way out of.
Dark: I’m dialing.
Anti: I’ve got nowhere to go! I burned my house down once it had enough Billies inside and I used up the rest of my savings buying the Billies.
Dark: And whose fault is that, Anti?
Anti: Society. Society and the Billies.
Dark: Anti, please…I really gave you every chance I could. I just…I can’t do it anymore…
Anti:
Dark:
Anti: What if I gave you… 10 million dollars cash?
Dark: You don’t have 10 million dollars, Anti.
Anti: I buried a large chest of doubloons once. I could go dig that up.
Dark: No, Anti.
Anti: It was either doubloons or the Sam plushies. A lot of something is in a hole somewhere.
Dark: I’m putting on some music, Anti, I’m not listening anymore. -Space Is Cool starts playing-
Anti: Rude!