Open hearts | Conor Maynard | Imagine
Word count: 5297
Request: Can I have a Conor imagine where the reader has been good friends with Conor since 2013 and they become friends with benefits after two years old friendship. Conor later realizes that he’s in love with the reader once he finds her kissing a stranger at a party. He later confesses his feelings which the reader returns affectionately. Lots of angst and fluff pls!
A/N: Thank you so much for the request! I was working on an idea that I had based on “Trust Issues” by Kiki Rowe (Young Bombs’ remix) and this request completed it perfectly, so I twisted things a little and combined the two things. Hope you gonna like it!
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“Can I turn the radio on?” yous asked to Conor, who was driving.
You two knew each other since you were kids. He was a couple years older and you were a little annoying, but as you grew up, you and your neighbor started getting closer, especially after a party of a classmate that both of you were way too drunk.
When Conor graduated and pursued his dream of being a singer, you were busy trying to survive high school, so you went in separate ways. Then success hitted Conor and you moved to London to try to do something with your life. Things were moving fast, however you randomly bumped into him at a friend’s party.
After the years you didn’t spoke to him, it was expected that things would be a little awkward or the conversation would be kind of lame with the old “How are you? Any news?” “I’m fine. No, nothing has happened” conversation, but you started talking just like the old days: anything was ten times more funny than it should be just because you two got along so well.
This time that both of you could drink without having to keep a secret from your parents, you were the life of the party and, because of Conor’s fame, you were pretty damn down to the finest parties in the country. It was insane. And when Conor’s career slowed down, you two continued to spoke to each other.
When you met him for the second time, he was on a relationship. You two never talked about it, it was something almost forbidden. By the time they broke up, it was almost inevitable. He would invite you to go out even when he was dating, when he wasn’t anymore, you and Conor were at the same parties and clubs every weekend, so eventually you got together.
You two kissed once, then twice and then again. And again. And again. Now you didn’t know anymore how many times you kissed Conor or spent the night with him. Despite this, you and him weren’t nothing but friends.
“Are you asking to a singer if you can turn the radio on? Are you fucking insane? Of course not, it’s my work and today is my day off. Also, I can’t handle that Styles guy singing, he’s on radio every time I turn it on and he’s shit, I’m so much better than him.” Conor joked and you rolled your eyes.
“Is it a yes, then?”
“Yes.” He said. “But only if you play my music.”
“Shut up, Conor.” you told as you turned the radio on.
You and your best friend were driving to Brighton to his mom’s birthday party. You usually didn’t enjoyed going to family parties. Seeing boring aunts and talking to selfish cousins weren’t what you would describe as fun activities however, although the Maynards were your second family as growing up, you haven’t seen them in ages. Also, you didn’t know why, but they were blessed and were a really nice family, even the boring conversations they could turn into a joke. You loved the Maynards and were more than glad to join Conor at Helen’s party.
Your parents moved away from your old street to another part of the town, besides that, they were travelling to Italy (after your mom talk about it with your dad for 3 years), so Conor offered you the alternative of staying at his family house. You were worried, but you said yes anyway.
Worried? Yes, worried. Because here’s a thing about Connor: when he likes a girl, he don’t keep quiet about it and you knew Conor long enough to say he fancied you. Sometimes you weren’t sure about it and others you would be 100% convinced of the idea. Maybe he didn’t realize that yet or maybe he was waiting to tell you or maybe it was only your desire of having him to like you again more than what Conor really felt, you couldn’t tell.
When you two were at school yet, you knew Conor liked you. You didn’t corresponded him and it was by a short amount of time, soon he was off school and distance got in between. One of your greatest mistakes was letting him go. You knew you tried to correspond it and couldn’t, however, in your head, everything would be okay if you did. Now that you thought that he might like you again, you were half freaking out and half wanting to be truth.
You found love only once in your life. He was at the same class as you and had the same tastes to everything, so you couldn’t help yourself. When he didn’t corresponded you, you broke down. You were afraid to risk your heart, not wanting the same “I need to recover” time you had to pass when you fell in love for the first time. All you could think that maybe Conor would lead you to this path, however, maybe Conor would be the only one you were more than happy to be hurt by, because he was pretty awesome.
You were singing along to the tune that came out of the speakers when Conor laughed.
“What?” You asked.
“You just sing as you are the singer and not me, it’s funny.”
“For God’s sake, Con.” you rolled your eyes again. “You know me for a crazy amount of time, you always see me singing, get over it.”
You were right, by the way. Conor did liked you. He didn’t figure it out so far, but it wasn’t an issue. The only thing he knew was that seeing you in that passenger side, while the sun shined through the window, singing like no one was watching, gave him a warm feeling. He knew that as long his had his best friend, he would be pretty fine.
It wasn’t always like this, of course. Conor and his depression was another topic that you two never discussed. Not for the same reason as the other refused subject, this one was because you couldn’t handle thinking that sometimes Conor started feeling that alone and you couldn’t help. He said that it was something only he could deal with, but it hurted you seeing your best friend in such position.
“I was kidding, Y/N.” Conor said when you were getting close to Brighton. “You don’t need to hear my own music.” You laughed and continued to sing “Are You Sure?” like nothing happened. “For the love of God then, don’t ruin my gorgeous tune with your horrible voice. You know, it was hard archiving this level of perfection.” he joked. “Actually, no. My voice is like this even if I’m ill and dying.”
“I won’t say nothing because this is actually accurate.” you told. “But fuck off, Maynard.” he laughed.
“Well, thank you then.” He recognized your compliment despite his self centered joke.
“Any time, Con.” you winked. You weren’t kidding, this song was one of your favorites.
“My mom will freak out when she finds out I brought you with me.” he commented.
“Oh my God, Conor, didn’t you tell her?”
“So I will just show up saying I’m staying in your parents’ house? Oh no. You know, I brought the keys of my parents’ house, I can stay in there. Wait… Helen don’t know I’m going to be at her party? What if she didn’t want it to be more than a family thing?”
“Y/N, relax.” Conor looked at you quickly before turning back to the road. “My mom loves you, she won’t say a thing. I was saying she will freak out of joy.” You took a deep breath, why Conor just couldn’t make things easier? “Actually, thanks God there’s Anna, because my parents could easily adopt you as their little girl. It would be awful.”
You blushed. “Con, you know it’s not like that.”
“Yes, it is. I don’t know how they can possible like you so much, but they just do. Even if was an event closed to family only, what are you? Part of the family.” He shrugged. “Also, Jack probably told them already you would come.” Jack got in Brighton the day before you two.
You smiled. “Thank you.”
“Any time, Y/N/N.” he said, imitating you.
The last 30 minutes of the path to the Maynard’s house were filled with nothing but the music you played. You were lost in your thoughts and apparently, so was Conor.
When he parked in front of the residence, you smiled right away. You got out of the car and took the stuff that were in the rear seat, Conor took your baggage out of the trunk. He rang the front door’s bell and you choosed to stay behind him.
“Conor!” Helen said excited, giving her son a hug.
“Your favorite son has arrived, mother.” he joked.
“Shut up, I am the favorite.” Anna told, coming to see her brother.
“You wish, little girl.” Con teased. “Happy birthday, mom.”
“Thank you, honey.” The woman smiled. “Oh, Y/N!” Helen exclaimed when she saw you, giving you a hug too. “I missed you, dear! Conor explained that you are busy with your work stuff, but it’s a long time since you last came to see us.”
“Yes, I missed you guys so much.” You agreed. “Happy birthday, Helen.” you said, giving her her present.
“Oh, that’s so sweet of you. Thank you, Y/N.”
Conor teased again: “And I declared that you have your own family too besides your work, Y/N, but mother doesn’t understand you aren’t a Maynard.” yet. You completed in your head as you smiled to the lady.
“For now.” Anna said as she hugged you and you gave her a sweet smile. She was your favorite Maynard, without any doubt. “I mean, you clearly are going to marry my brother.” she winked and then confessed: “I missed you too.”
“I missed my girl as well.” you told her.
“Anna, please, don’t tell Y/N my plans for our future, you’re going to ruin it.” Conor joked. “How the hell I’m going to propose and get the Insta shots of her horrendous shock face? I need to boost my Insta account, you know.”
“It’s not a secret you’re deeply in love with me, Con.” you said back while giving Anna a kiss on the head. “It’s only a matter of time.” Anna giggled and her older brother rolled his eyes.
“Where is father?” Conor asked, entering the house. You followed him.
“On market, we forgot some things to the party.”
“As usual.” Anna completed.
“Hey Y/N.” Jack greeted, sat in the sofa.
“Hi Jack, how are you?”
“Fine.” he shrugged.
“You don’t want to tell Y/N how you missed her too? How she’s the lost Maynard?” Conor asked.
“I don’t need to miss her.” Jack told, standing up to give you a hug. “We have a kick ass relationship that works through telepathy.” he mocked. “I bet you don’t have this kind of connection with her.”
You and Jack saw each other almost every day, because this was the amount of times you saw Conor, so of course he wouldn’t miss you.
“Yeah, we have this and, also, we have Whatsapp.” You said, winking to Jack and making him laugh.
“Is this the voice of a certain young beautiful lady?” you heard a man ask.
You turned around and saw Gary entering the living room. You smiled.
“Hey, kid. How are you?” He asked, going to you and giving you a hug.
Conor snorted. “Why you guys don’t switch me for her? I’m the son, dad!” You all laughed.
“Conor, there’s a gorgeous girl in the room and then there’s you. Who you recomend me to great first?” He asked, giving Con a hug too, but he didn’t hugged back.
“Don’t touch me.” Con joked, laughing afterwards and corresponding the hug. “Yeah, you’re right.”
“I’m the wisdom, kid.” Gary winked.
The party went really well. As usual, the Maynards were amazing. You laughed the hell out of you with Conor and Jack teasing Anna and she being even sassier than her older brothers. The other guests were pretty fine too, you knew almost everybody already and those who were introduced for the first time asked if you were Conor’s girlfriend or Jack’s. You weren’t none.
“Hey.” Conor called you, you were talking to Anna.
“I was just settling with Jack about going out tonight.”
You looked to the youngest sibling, thorned. Going out the three of you and leaving her behind didn’t feel right.
“I have homework, Y/N.” She told.
“Okay then.” you smiled to Conor and he return it.
Usually, the Maynards’ parties ended not so early. It wasn’t out of nothing that Con and Jack were used to hang out late at night, their family was always excited about reunions. So no one cared when you and the brothers wanted to go out and leave the party. Helen was pretty fine with that too, knowing that all her children would be home the next day.
You knew Jack and you knew Con, of course you brought a club outfit with you on the trip. Therefore you hitted upstairs to get change. Anna followed you.
“So…” She started.
“What?” You asked, putting mascara.
“When you and my brother are going to admit to us that you two are dating?”
You looked at her sat in bed through the mirror. “You know we are not, Anna.”
“C’mon, Y/N! You like him, he likes you. What are you waiting for?”
You gave a smile and continued to put your makeup. “I am not that sure that your brother feel this way about me.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can sweet talk Jack with that, but not me, Y/N. I’m the brain of this family. Just admit that you fancy him, so Conor can realize you’re the love of his life.”
You laughed. “Anna!”
“I mean, for a singer/songwriter he’s kinda slow for not comprehending this about you two.”
You rolled your eyes and then admitted: “I don’t know if I want him to do that.”
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“No! Y/N!” She exclaimed, anguished. “You always were his person and he always was yours! You two pretend you have a friendship, well, you don’t.”
“Since when you are an expert in relationships, little Maynard?” You asked and snorted, giving up to finish your makeup and going to join Anna in bed. “Fuck off. You are a little baby still.”
She rolled her eyes. “Y/N, I’m a few years younger than you, I’m not a baby.” And you already knew that because you would never have this conversation if you didn’t trusted her and knew she wasn’t crazy to say some kind of bullshit about you and Conor just because it would be what you wanted to hear. “Why everyone keeps saying that I’m so young? Fuck off, people.”
You smiled at her and gave a hug. “It is because none of us wanted to grow up, you shouldn’t too.”
“Well, guys, you are already late.”
Anna moved away from you, breaking the hug. “So, let’s talk for real now. Stop playing me, I know you’re trying to avoid the Conor topic.”
“You really are the brain of the Maynards, aren’t you?” You asked, impressed.
Anna smiled. “Yeah, I’m fucking amazing. But again: what the hell is wrong with you? Why you don’t want to be with my brother?”
“It is not that I don’t want to be with your brother, it’s only that I want to be with him later, you know? You think that I didn’t realize that he’s the one, well, I did. I always knew that, if we liked each other, we would be pretty awesome. But right now? I’m so young, we have all our lives in front of us. Why now? I don’t even want a boyfriend. I don’t need to fall now.” you sighed. “And I don’t want to admit to myself that I’m in love with him. I can hold it back, I know I can. Just for a short time. One year, two… Well, I really don’t want to fall in love for real until I am 25. And I don’t know if I can take another heartbreak.” You were out of breath, you didn’t know that you had all of this inside of you.
“But it won’t be a heartbreak, Y/N, he loves you too.” Anna said. “He just needs to realize that.”
“For fuck’s sake, Anna. Are you hearing what I say?” You laid on bed and took a deep breath, she laid by your side. “I don’t want Conor to correspond me. I want us to be together, but I want us to be together later. When both of us will be ready to commit to it, to find out if we can handle being on a relationship that we don’t have how to avoid talking about our problems. We are just friends, this is all we know. What if I’m wrong? What if he isn’t the one?”
Anna laughed. “You are a freaking mess! You’re being the least logical as possible, Y/N.”
You sighed. “I know.”
“So why can’t you be illogical for real and tell Conor how you feel?”
You stared Anna, seeing her eyes that were in the same color of Conor’s.
“I just can’t.”
Conor didn’t know what happened with you, but since you went upstairs in his parents’ house and spoke to Anna, you were acting all strange. He would kill his sister for messing up with you. She was just a kid and had fucked you still. She isn’t a kid, Conor. That’s what you would tell him. Well, what could he say? Yes, she was.
“Let’s go, Jack!” You called, taking Con’s brother by the hand and pulling him to the club without a single eye contact with the older one.
“Fuck Y/N. You are going to be a crazy bitch today, huh?” he joked.
“Maybe.” you smirked and Conor frowned. What the hell?
As soon as you all entered the club, you were nowhere to be seen, something that made Conor sighed in every corner of the place. He thought you two would be together for the whole night, just talking and drinking together. Maybe dancing too, if you were into it.
“Conor!” You exclaimed, finally finding your best friend in the club.
Conor was sit on a sofa, looking around. “Y/N?” he saw you were holding hands with a stranger and, for being so excited, you definitely had some drinks.
“Look who I found!” You pointed to the guy and then laughed. “I mean, you don’t know him. Actually, neither did I before tonight. I actually found that guy from our school, you know? Sage? Everybody knows Sage. He was amazing at the football team.”
“I don’t have a clue who Sage is.” Conor said, already losing his mind.
“Oh, maybe you weren’t in school anymore by that time.” You giggled. “You know, Adam, Conor is a few years older than us, so he was so much better than us, juniors.”
“I never said that.” Conor was confused. “Actually, we were best friends, even if I was older.”
“Yeah, I know… Friends. Best mates, me and you!” You said, so drunk that you just couldn’t shut the fuck up. “Anyway, Conor, I met Sage and this is his friend. Conor, meet Adam. Adam, this is Conor.” you introduced them and they nodded to each other, not excited as you for the meeting. “Alright, now that everyone knows everyone… Con, I’m heading to Adam’s place.” You informed and Conor loose his breath.
“No, you are not.” He said. “You are staying at my house, Y/N.”
“Oh…” Adam said. “I didn’t realize that you two were boyfriend and girlfriend.”
You laughed, you wished that! Unfortunately, you weren’t Conor’s girlfriend. “Because we are not, Adam.” You smiled at him, putting your both hands in his pectoral. “And actually, I was crashing his parents’ house, because, you know, Conor is a big boy and he moved out from Brighton before anyone could think in getting out from here. It was nice at the time…” you giggled “You see, he fancied me and I didn’t correspond it, so things were a little awkward. But now we are over it, right Con? He got over me, then he had a girlfriend and they broke up, he was torn apart, but he’s back at the game for years now, so it’s all good.”
“Okay…” Adam said, not being sure about what he should do. “I will get my coat and we can go, what do you think about that?”
“Perfect!” you agreed. “I will be right here with my best friend, Conor Maynard.”
Immediately after Adam get out of sight, Conor took your hand and sat you down. “What the fuck is going on, Y/N?”
“Nothing, Con!” You assured. “Something should had happened?” you asked.
“You’re acting weird.”
“Well, I am a weirdo.”
“But why are you saying that? I know that you know that I’m a weirdo by now.”
“Con? Spit it out.”
He rolled his eyes. “At first, you were quiet all the way here, then you disappeared and the next thing I know is you with this guy that came out of nowhere.”
“Adam didn’t came out of nowhere, he is Sage’s friend!” you exclaimed, more happy than you should be about the situation.
“And who the hell is Sage?”
“Urgh, I told you already, Con. He was the football player in…”
“I know that, Y/N.”
“So why you keep asking me about him?”
“I didn’t ask about him!”
“Well… Someone is losing his mind.” You said ironically.
Conor sighed. “Y/N…”
“What, Con?” you asked. “What now?”
“I just thought you were staying with me tonight, that’s all.”
“Tell your mom I’m sorry, but I won’t going back to your parents’ house.” You told, suddenly acting sober.
“Ready to go, Y/N?” Adam asked, appeared.
“Yeah.” You smiled and got up. “Let’s go.”
Adam put his hand in your back, pulling you to a kiss before going. It pissed Conor for real. Conor knew the only reason Adam was doing that in front of him was because you snapped out, so he was trying to show that it was him who was taking you home and not Conor. Well, thank you very much, Adam, I know this already.
And although you and Conor weren’t dating, he didn’t know when was the last time he watched you leave the club with another man. You two got so used to hang out together that neither he spent the night with another one besides you for a long time.
“Oh, that was something to look up to.” You said when you and Adam stopped kissing.
He smiled and took you out. Conor watched, feeling shitty.
“Are you back already, son?” Helen asked, seeing Conor enter their house.
“What about Jack and Y/N?” she was at the kitchen, so Conor went there to give her a kiss before heading upstairs. “I left some cake for all of you because I thought that you would come home wasted.” she said.
“Jack will take an Uber back home and Y/N isn’t coming.” He gave a weak smile, pretending everything was fine. “How was your party?”
“It was okay, it just finished.”
“Nice.” he nodded. “I’m going to sleep.”
As Conor were leaving the room, his mom called him.
“Don’t let her slip again.”
“We been there, mother. She wasn’t into me. Now, we are just friends.”
Helen smiled softly: “Are you?”
Conor looked her. Were you?
Your phone rang and you looked around Adam’s living room, finding the electronic device among your clothes on the floor. It was a message from Con.
Call me when you done. I’m picking you.
You took a deep breath before answering him: Thanks Con, but there’s no need.
For fuck’s sake, Y/N, please. I don’t trust this guy.
I’ll go by morning. You told. I’m heading straight up to London, I will take the train.
Why? What about your stuff?
I can pick that with you later this week.
Ok, but why? You didn’t respond instantly. Y/N, why?
I just can handle this right now.
This what? Are you okay?
No, you weren’t. You were falling apart alone in that place. Adam was taking a shower in the suite, you didn’t even wanted to go to the bed when you and him got to his loft. You felt your stomach contracting just for thinking in that night being sweeter than rough sex on the living room’s carpet.
Your phone started ringing. You didn’t need to see the name on the screen to know who it was.
“Y/N.” Conor sighed. “I’m worried. How are you?”
“I am fine, Con. Relax.”
“Con, honestly, I’m fine.” You told, but tears started falling from your eyes and Conor could hear you. Even if you weren’t crying, he never heard you sound as sad as you did in that moment.
“That’s it. Tell me where you are, I’m picking you up right now. I don’t care what this dick has done to you.”
“He didn’t nothing but what he should have done.”
“Y/N, the address. Now.”
You are the dick, Conor. You are the reason why I’m crying. You sighed.
“I’m sending my location through Whatsapp.” You finally gave up.
You didn’t wait to Adam to finish his shower. You putted your clothes back on and left the apartment without thinking twice.
You hated how you got after drinking too much. Following the alcohol’s euphoria, you always got sad and needy. Why you were crying? You would hold back your feelings for Conor, what you were crying about? Which reasons you had to tearing apart like that?
It was cold outside and you started tremble as you waited to Conor to arrive, being out of the building and feeling the wind in your arms.
“Y/N!” You heard him call you, spotting him a few cars away.
You walk there and entered in his car. “Hey Con.”
He hugged you. “What happened? Why are you crying? What the dickhead has done to you?”
“It wasn’t him, Conor. I swear to you, it wasn’t him.” Conor held you and believed in you. Your voice was so fragile that he wouldn’t dare not to. “Drive us home, Con.”
“I will sleep on the couch.” Conor said after laying you down on his bed. “You can call me anytime, for anything.”
You nodded and heard his steps leaving the room. “Con?” You called, before he was too far away.
He almost ran to you. “What?”
“You can sleep in here, you know. I wouldn’t be the first time we share a bed.”
“I’m fine, Y/N.”
“No, Con. I mean I want you to sleep with me tonight. Please.”
He sighed and laid on bed. You turned back to him and he understood the sign to hold you close.
“I hated seeing you leave with that guy.”
“He didn’t do anything, Conor.” You guaranteed.
“I don’t care, Y/N. I hated it.”
“You were just jealous.” you teased, giggling a little, tired.
“Yes, I was.” he admitted, making you lose your breath and stop laughing.
“Even my mom knew it before me, Y/N. I just looked at her and it was all written in my face. She knows, everybody knows.”
“What, Conor?” you asked again cautiously.
“That I love you. I always did, I always will.”
You gasped, trying to be reasonable. “It wasn’t always like this, you know. You had Victoria.”
“Yes.” He agreed. “I loved her, but I didn’t give a fuck about her when you spoke about her today. All I could think was that I didn’t wanted you to go home with that guy.”
Your heart was racing, you didn’t want to turn and look into his eyes because you knew that if you stared Conor, you would lost your mind.
“Conor, I guess you had too much to drink today.”
“Fuck off, Y/N, you know I’m sober and I know you love me too.”
Your eyes widened. “Wh-what?”
“This was the motive you went crazy tonight, right?”
“Conor…” you sighed. “You can’t do this to me.”
“Why? Why not?”
“Because you brought me to tears just for being sweet and bringing me home.” you confessed.
“So that’s why you were crying?” he stopped hugging you.
You nodded. “I love you so much, Con.”
“Look at me.” he asked.
“I’m not looking at you, Conor.”
“Why are you so difficult?”
You snapped. “Damn, Conor!” You screamed, realizing afterwards you could had waken up the rest of the Maynards. “Sorry.” you took a deep breath, facing the empty wall of his room. “Look, everything that’s passing through your mind already passed in mine.” You sighed. “I can’t handle see you right now because I now if I see you, I’ll be a few inches from your lips and I will kiss you. I know you, you want to kiss me too.”
“So let’s kiss.”
“No, Con.” You told convicted. “Because if we kiss knowing our feelings for each other, there’s no turning back.”
Conor realized you wouldn’t give up so he gave up and got closer again, holding you another time.
“Why are you avoiding us getting together? You don’t make any sense.”
“Because I thought in everything, Conor, and I can’t handle getting hurt again. If I was that hurted before, I can’t even think about how much I’ll be hurt by you.”
“But you won’t. I love you, I won’t hurt you.”
“We will hurt each other, Conor.” You said. “We aren’t ready, we are too young.”
“Don’t say that, Y/N.”
“I’m just finishing college, Con. I just began in my first real job. We are so young, we have so many mistakes to make.”
“So let’s make them together.”
He interrupted you. “Look at me, Y/N. Please. I’m serious.”
You gave up, turning to him. You lost your breath, you forgot how beautiful were his eyes. “Here I am.”
“You broke my heart once. Victoria broke my heart. I know you’re fucked up and afraid, but so am I.” He held your head in between his hands. “If we don’t work things out now, we will break up and eventually we will get back together and everything will be fine. I know we will always bump to each other just like we did years ago, because someday we will meet and we will be exactly where we were meant to be. You know why? Because I know I love you and I know I love you even when I’m not loving you…” He gave a side look, thinking it through. “If that makes sense.”
“It desn’t.” you giggled.
“I know it doesn’t.” he admitted, taking a deep breath. “I know I loved you even when I was with someone else. That was what I meant.” He got closer as you opened a smile. “All I know is loving you and loving you is all I will ever know, so, please Y/N, just let me in.”
“Con…” your lips brushed his. “I’m scared.” you admitted whispering.
“I know.” he whispered back.
“Please, don’t break me.” you asked.
And finally you kissed him.