another couple

Shit my wife has said to our cat part 2

- Hello my angel, my very most special piece of shit.

- I have several questions: Where the fuck did you come from? Why the fuck are you here? And, that’s it. 

- I cannot love you in the way you want, you spooning bastard.

- Is your flesh made of pain? If that’s true, why do you demand to inflict it??

- You could be the mother of darkness. You open your mouth and scream and that is what ushers in the darkness.

- If we had a saintly cat in this household, she wouldn’t fit in.

- I pet another cat. It was amazing, Miss Kitty. It was untouched by your evil.

- (Cat: gets sick) I never thought you mortal enough for a cold, Miss Kitty. I thought you ethereal, but not in a heavenly sort of way.

- (Cat: sneezes) Get the bad spirits out, Miss Kitty. Those are just the demons.

- You know what you are Miss Kitty? A nuisance. And a pixie. Who eats newborns. That’s how you get your gold. Where’s your gold, you little shit? 

-Lay down! Collapse your legs and put your body on the bed, you little monster!

- I’m arguing with you because you don’t have a brain. You have a festering cesspool of intentions. And I love you so goddamned much.

- You’ve got whiskers like livewire, hot stuff.

Part 1

I think one of the reasons the Harry Potter Epilogue was so poorly received was because the audience was primarily made up of the Millennial generation.

We’ve walked with Harry, Ron and Hermione, through a world that we thought was great but slowly revealed itself to be the opposite. We unpeeled the layers of corruption within the government, we saw cruelty against minorities grow in the past decades, and had media attack us and had teachers tell us that we ‘must not tell lies’. We got angry and frustrated and, like Harry, Ron and Hermione, had to think of a way to fight back. And them winning? That would have been enough to give us hope and leave us satisfied.

But instead. There was skip scene. And suddenly they were all over 30 and happy with their 2.5 children.

And the Millennials were left flailing in the dust.

Because while we recognised and empathised with everything up to that point. But seeing the Golden Trio financially stable and content and married? That was not something our generation could recognise. Because we have no idea if we’re ever going to be able to reach that stage. Not with the world we’re living in right now.

Having Harry, Ron and Hermione stare off into the distance after the battle and wonder about what the future might be would have stuck with us. Hell, have them move into a shitty flat together and try and sort out their lives would have. Have them with screaming nightmares and failed relationships and trying to get jobs in a society that’s falling apart would have. Have them still trying to fix things in that society would have. Because we known Voldemort was just a symptom of the disease of prejudice the Wizarding World.

But don’t push us off with an 'all was well’. In a world about magic, JK Rowling finally broke our suspension of disbelief by having them all hit middle-class and middle-age contentment and expecting a fanbase of teenagers to accept it.

Also. Since when was 'don’t worry kids, you’re going to turn out just like your parents’ ever a happy ending? Does our generation even recognise marriage and money and jobs as the fulfillment of life anymore? Does our generation even recognise the Epilogue’s Golden Trio anymore?

10

“The bromance. The captivating couple”

Dong Wook. It was so nice working with you.I hope we can work in another drama again. I miss you.
- Mr Goblin, Gong Yoo hyung. We had beautiful days. I wasn’t lonely, thanks to you. If we could work together again. I think we can have more fun.

10

Prompto.

(idk why but I will never not love the idea of Sora being aware of his powers in 4th-wall-breaking ways)

imagine if life worked how tv executives think only one lesbian couple can be in a show or its too much. you and your gf are at Whole Foods or some shit and another lesbian couple walks in and you have to lesbian duel right there next to the cucumber water to see who can stay because there can only be one

  • me: *stumbles upon something i kno w will trigger a moodswing or will cause me to split*
  • me: *checks it out anyway*
  • me, once ive been triggered: oh no ://// im so sad ://// why do i always feel like this ://// im so miserable :///
  • me, the next day: *stumbles upon something i kno w wi-
4

battle couple:

it didn’t take long, the blue glow of his blade and the burning red of magnus’s magic lighting up their faces and before alec knew it there was some semblance of silence, the two of them standing there panting. magic was still crackling in the air and alec had ichor on his hand, dripping down his blade. x

Here to shake things up

[Ko-fi / Redbubble]

8

Mr. and Mr. Stilinski-Hale AU: Derek and Stiles are just another couple living the monotonous life of married people: a doctor and a teacher, together for 10 years, co-owners of a big house in a good neighborhood, a dog, a nice bank account and a normal, boring life. Or, at least, so it seemed. In secret, Derek and Stiles work as assassins for rivals agencies that would do anything to keep them apart. It turns out that it’s tough being married after all.