jim telling spock that humans call sex "the skidily didily doo" and spock believing him so that one time bones had to ask spock "so, have you ever . . . you know" spock just shakes his head and confidently says "No, Doctor. I have never done the skidily didily doo."
imagine bones just nodding once and being like ‘okay then’ and slowly walking out of the room
Bones being late for a meeting and the bridge crew go to find him. When he opens the door he's shirtless with a 6-pac, in low riding jeans, and a black cowboy hat. He starts apologizing and says he forgot to set his alarm, but nobody can focus
imagine bones refusing to acknowledge that anything is weird with his outfit
he presents the medbay report in that outfit, not even batting an eye
Imagine Spock saying "but i'm half CANADIAN!!". Scotty angrily eating haggis "No one celebrates St. Andrews with me this much". Chechov removing his universal translator and refusing to speak English standard the whole day. Someone asking Sulu why he isn't annoyed about 4th of july like everyone else, imagine Sulu saying "i was born in san fransisco, excuse you!!" Imagine jim and bones telling them "You all had eurovision! this is our time to shine" Imagine Spock repeating "I'm half CANADIAN!!"
imagine spock sitting at his station and angrily firmly spitting facts about canada to whoever will listen
scotty gets drunk in his quarters by himself
jim accidentally shoots a firework at bones who spends the rest of the day chasing him around the ship
So Spock Prime is pretty careful about not telling the AOS kids anything about their potential futures, but Jim always asks him for hints. One time Spock decides to indulge him and gets all serious about it, which leads Jim to believe it's really important. With a completely straight face, Spock simply says, 'Whales,' and then walks away.
imagine when they actually do encounter the whale mission and jim has this big dorky smile on his face the entire time cause this is it this is what hes been waiting for
Imagine Kirk, Spock, and McCoy fighting an alien adversary and Spock having a gun pointed at him, only for McCoy to jump in the way and take the hit. Kirk is quick to react while Spock stands there stunned. Anything you'd like to add?
Imagine Spock staying stunned all the way back to the ship, watching as Jim frantically calls for Chapel and M’Benga to get ready.
Both Spock and Jim sit in the medbay in chairs next to Bones’ bed as the team does their best to save him.
Jim falls asleep in the chair that night, after Bones’ heart stabilized and M’Benga told him they could do nothing but wait.
the crew flirting with jim whenever spock's around trying to make him jealous. he doesn't notice at first but starts to catch on and asks bones about it. bones doesn't want to get involved and says he hadn't noticed. it continues until one day sulu sits on jim's lap right on the bridge and is being all flirty and sexy and jim is smiling back at him and everyone can see spock turning green and his hands shaking hard. then he sees sulu give jim a vulcan kiss and spock loses his shit.
and spockers expects everyone to be afraid because he totally lost it like he was screaming and at one point he threw a chair
but everyone just looks relieved and when spock finally picks up jim and carries him off the bridge you can hear uhura mumbling about how ‘dear god it took him long enough’
imagine bones booping spock when hes bored becoming a thing. like going onto the bridge and walking behind spock and being like "hey spock" and spock turns around and is like "yes doctor?" and bones just dramatically thrusts his arm out and very lightly pokes the tip of spocks nose with his finger "boop". and then he walks away into the turbolift silently and everyone is just like "???" and spock is like "boop?" and then he starts doing it back so the next time it happens spock is in the sickbay
((cont)) and bones has just finished patching him up from some away mission gone awry and then he boops his nose and makes the noise wit it. spock just nods solemnly before he too dramatically thrusts his arm out and pokes bones’ nose “boop, doctor. boop.” and bones just stares at him for a few seconds before dying of laughter
imagine that becoming spock and bones’ thing, whenever they see each other, with a perfectly straight face, they boop each other on the nose
Okay, so imagine if Jim and Spock are renowned for their fighting skills (as they are) and Jim makes jokes about having to protect Bones' Southern ass all the time and both of them are protective of Bones. Bones just takes it and retorts with "well somebody's gotta look out for me while I'm treatin' your accident prone selves." Then one day Spock and Jim are sparring and they've got these awesome moves going on, and Bones just calmly walks in and kicks their asses, because hes quietly badass.
imagine bones just creaming those two losers without even saying a word, and refusing to talk about it even after jims finished picking himself up off the floor
imagine jim trying to figure out where exactly the good doctor learned to fight like that
imagine jim making up fake backgrounds for bones like ‘hes secretly part of the mafia’, 'he wrestled bears as a child’, and 'he participated in the hunger games, volunteered in fact’
imagine jim spreading those rumors all around the ship
Imagine Spock tho, when Jim won't stop dropping hints about getting married and Spock continues to be on the fence, and Jim finally just asks him one day, point blank, and Bones just yells from medical JUST SAY YES ALREADY YOU HOBGOBLIN while echoed by the entire bridge
imagine when spock finally does whisper yes and the entire ship EXPLODES like people are screaming
Imagine Jim getting really into celebrating and everyone expects Bones to get all grumpy and prissy about his enthusiasm, but he turns out to be an even bigger patriot. As in, covered head-to-toe with flags, chanting "USA! USA! USA!" through medbay, shoving peach pie at people, naming a bunch of tribbles after the founding fathers, etc. etc.
imagine bones in one of those stereotypical ‘old southern guy on july fourth’ outfits like with jean shorts, flip-flops, a super old t-shirt thats three sizes too big and has an eagle on it, and sunglasses
au where old married spirk live at and run a little bed & breakfast after retiring from starfleet. whenever a touchy-feely couple walk in jim laughs and nudges spock like 'oooh, remember those days?' to which spock replies 'jim, you touch me approximately thrice a minute. those days are now'
imagine jim just laughing and wrapping spock in a hug and declaring three as too low of a number