@eulenstadt and I were talking about an AU in which Jacobi and Maxwell end up emergancy babysitters for Anne Eiffel (and an AU where everyone is ALIVE). It was hilarious so I am going to share.
Jacobi and Maxwell use Anne to pretend they are actually real adults and not vaguely horrific people when out and about. “We’re the guardians of this small deaf child, clearly we’re responsible and not at all special intelligence operatives for an evil mega-corporation.” “We’ve never even killed anybody.” “Definitely not more than one person.”
The Wonder Twins pick up ASL very quickly, Jacobi’s used to using hand signals on the ballistics range when he and his coworkers wear ear protection and literally cannot hear one another. Maxwell’s just a really fast learner.
They use Anne as an excuse to go do things they want to do. I.e. Laser tag.
Jacobi: “Anne wants to play laser tag.”
Maxwell: “How do you know, you didn’t even sign anything to her.”
Jacobi: “ANNE wants to play LASER TAG.”
Maxwell: “…Anne definitely wants to play laser tag.”
And so they play laser tag. This is a learning experience all around.
Jacobi and Maxwell teach Anne tactics both legitimate and definitely cheating.
Jacobi and Maxwell learn how to have a third person (who isn’t Colonel Kepler) on their team.
Maxwell teaches Anne how to build basic robots out of cans and wires. Jacobi teaches her how to make Molotov Cocktails. They burn stuff in a near-by field where a normal babysitter might take a kid to set off baking soda rockets.
Anne REALLY likes that Jacobi and Maxwell don’t treat her like a kid but like a tiny adult. She doesn’t realize this isn’t so much on purpose as because Jacobi and Maxwell have no idea how to act around children.
Anne also REALLY likes Jacobi’s robotic arm. She loves the idea that he’s a grown-up unaffiliated with her school who has a disability, in his case that he’s an amputee.
Anne looks up to Maxwell as this amazing unstoppable wonder.
During dress-up Maxwell is given a crown and dubbed Queen Computer. Later changed to Queen SQL at Maxwell’s behest. She demands Jacobi call her Queen SQL for the rest of the night.
Anne and Jacobi argue like two children. They are building a block tower and one of them screws it up. When it falls they immediately start blaming each other. “You messed up the foundation!” “You tried to build it too high!” “You nudged it!” “No way!” “I saw you!”
This slowly devolves into “You’re stupid!” “Your face is stupid!”
Maxwell stares at the camera like she’s on The Office.
“Jacobi, she’s six.” “SIX AND WRONG!”
So in other words, Maxwell is her hero, Jacobi is her playmate. It works out well. Maxwell thinks Anne is adorable (especially for a human child), Jacobi both has an affection for her and wants to punt her out a window sometimes.
Maxwell is going to make sure Anne becomes a badass when she grows up. Jacobi is going to make sure she knows how to take care of herself.
Eventually Anne makes up name signs for them both. Maxwell’s is “S” and “Q” while also signing “crown” (she only has two hands so she can’t get the “L” in there). Jacobi is a “J” over her right arm (she really likes that Jacobi is just some rando who is like her). Jacobi petitioned for it to be a “J” that turned into the sign for “fire” but it was dubbed too difficult by Maxwell and Anne.
Maxwell strikes a bargain to make Anne take a bath. When she gets out they can paint Jacobi’s nails. Jacobi is not privy to this bargain until it is too late.
Jacobi: “WHY CAN’T SHE PAINT YOUR NAILS?!”
Maxwell: “Because I hate nail polish!”
Jacobi: “AND I DON’T?!”
Maxwell: “You need to step outside of these preconceived gender roles you–”
Jacobi: “Don’t try to make me better myself. I hate bettering myself and you know it.”
He gets his nails painted. He swears them both to secrecy and whines about it the entire time.
Later, after Anne goes to bed Jacobi peels the nail polish off and bitches at Maxwell. “Shut up, Jacobi.” “SHE’S DEAF, MAXWELL, SHE CAN’T HEAR ME!” “I know, but I can.”
Doug comes home and everyone is in one piece. Anne wakes up to tell him about her day.
Anne tells him about laser tag. “Daddy, we kicked ass!” Maxwell immediately regrets teaching Anne that sign. She blames Jacobi when Doug gives them a wounded look.
Anne: “Jacobi taught me how to make cocktails!”
Doug: *absolute horror* “WHAT–?!”
Jacobi: *quickly, because he still wants Eiffel to pay them* “Nothing alcoholic!”
Doug: “Thank God–”
Jacobi: “MOLOTOV cocktails.”
Doug: “THAT’S JUST AS BAD!”
Jacobi: “It’s a really important skill! What if she wants to start a riot!?”
Doug: “WHY WOULD SHE NEED TO START A RIOT, ‘SPLOSION MAN?!”
Jacobi: “Lots of reasons!”
After much argument about how making incendiaries is NOT AN IMPORTANT LIFE SKILL Jacobi says “I had to teach myself! I saved your curtains, half your kitchen, and a visit to the emergancy room.”
Eiffel pays them like they’re two teenagers.
As they go out to the car Jacobi and Maxwell congratulate themselves on a job well done.
Our Louis and Lestat cosplays
Anime North was such a wonderful con and we are so happy for winning the contest in our divison, a lot of people reconized us and all the judges knew our characters and have read the books, they were so sweet.
The fandom is bigger than expected~
Our next challenge will definitly be MonChevy from Versailles
One of the things that I’m DEFINITELY gonna miss about Lucifer being filmed in Vancouver is the cast complaining about the cold weather all the time and looking so adorable in their winter jackets 👌🏻😩😂😍😭❤
I’ve been reading Wonder Woman Rebirth by Greg Rucka. It was a really good run tying New52 with the previous prime universe, with some rough spots.
Rucka really knows how to write complicated women and their even more complicated dynamic with each other. There’s Diana with Barbara Ann aka Cheetah, Etta Candy/Barbara, Etta and now Diana (sob– understandable why Etta is angry with Diana but still!), and the one IMO that is a complicated, jumbled mess: Veronica Cale and Diana.
I mentioned before how Veronica Cale was Diana’s Lex Luthor but I failed to take account how wonderfully tension filled and ‘don’t know if she’ll kiss Veronica or kill her’ foe yay there is between them.
Diana and Veronica Cale have an epic Smallville Clark and Lex level foe yay. No, really:
Seriously, look: Veronica stopped the FBI questioning her involvment with Godwatch and she turns just in time (senses?) to see Diana hovering just outside her window. And Veronica instantly notices Diana doesn’t have her lasso (her golden perfect).
And then they’re talking thisclose with Diana demanding Veronica’s help in restoring Barbara Ann’s humanity. Veronica doesn’t flinch, doesn’t back down and isn’t the slightest bit cowed.
Make no mistake, what Veronica did was despicable. She pursued her goal to save her daughter with a ruthless tunnel visioned intensity that damned everyone and ultimately herself. Veronica accepts and resents this truth about herself. More, she resents that Diana saved her from Cheetah (Barbara Ann).
Veronica’s dislike for Diana was instant from the first moment she read Lois Lane’s article on Wonder Woman, Veronica resented everything Diana is and stood for. IMO Veronica resented Diana because Veronica used to be all the things Diana was at that time: Naive, idealistic, and someone who believed that love can help the world.
(Note the ledge and the glass doors, it’s a thing.)
In the panels before this Bruce and Clark intrude on their stare down, Veronica takes the opportunity to step back inside, and close the glass doors without breaking eye contact with Diana.
And even as I compare them to Clark and Lex’s Smallville dynamic there is one thing Diana and Veronica that I know Clark/Lex fans would give their eye teeth for.
You know the fic trope: Black tie fundraiser event where a highly eligible bachelor/bachelorette (usually the idealistic hero) donates their time for a worthy cause in exchange for people donating their money. Then the billionaire half of that slash pairing drops a huge amount of money for charity and wins a date from the idealistic hero.
Diana joins a fundraiser to help victims of landmines, Bruce contributes by pitching in his money, Lex Luthor ups the ante with a $7 million donation and then:
Veronica one ups both.
I swear, this was like, beat for beat a Smallville Clark/Lex fanfic except its with Diana and Veronica and it’s canon.
Sure it ended up being a ruse for both since Veronica had an ulterior motive and Diana went along with it because of her suspicions (she thinks Veronica is responsible for best friend getting possessed by the Cheetah god) but it doesn’t negate the fact that Veronica and Diana went out on a date.
Diana ends the date with a kiss on Veronica’s cheek which in retrospect, after reading a few pages ahead now feels more like a Godfather, ‘I know it was you’ Fredo kiss.
Because later this happens:
Ledge, glass doors. Diana hovering. It’s a thing!
Diana makes clear to Veronica Cale she has her measure, and formally kickstarting their tension filled archnemesis dynamic, with some of the significant moments happening/bookending on ledges with glass doors.
So in case you guys haven’t heard yet there’s a new Netflix adaptation of Anne of Green Gables that just started airing - a few eps have already aired on Canadian TV and Netflix is releasing all episodes in May- and it’s so good! I wasn’t planning to watch it because it’s focused on Anne’s younger years and let’s face it I’m mostly in AoGG adaptations for the romance, but they cast an actress who’s the best fit for Anne I’ve EVER seen - soo incredibly charming and expressive and sensitive - but mostly I wanted to say -
I fell in love with Gilbert Blythe all over again.
#one of the best fictional character ever tbh #true romantic lead #loved Anne when he first met her at age 14 #principled #stubborn #so awesome
Happy birthday ma Queeeeen ..thank you for the times you made my belly hurt from cracking up and the times when you helped pick me up when I didn’t think I would be able to bounce back…….sexy, confident and incredibly beautiful.. an inspiration to not only myself but every single person in this world I love you Jesy.. have the best day ever ❤️❤️❤️
stop calling Natalie Dormer your wife. Everyone who loves GoT makes her their wife.
Me, who first saw Natalie Dormer in the Heath Ledger version of Casanova and who then fell head over heels when she became the best actress to ever portray Anne Boleyn ever on screen via the Tudors and who squealed like a pig when she had a small and underutilized role in Captain America, and who already wifed her up before she even got to the GoT because I have hipster levels of gay love for this woman:
Morality is a firm believer in tradition. Every summer is kicked off with a campfire cookout, complete with burgers, sodas, sparklers, and s’mores roasted over an open flame. Princey and Logan have always been a part, but it’s just recently that Anxiety has started spending time with them all. So, by extension, this is the first time he accepts Patton’s invitation to join them. The night before, Morality writes a list of things to pick up from the store, reading the items aloud in the main room on the couch beside Ann.