When somebody asks me how life is going, I always have the same answers: It’s okay, it’s fine.
What I really want to say is that my mother’s growing old and I’m scared. The wrinkles that form her face when she frowns have gotten deeper and her finger nails that she used to keep colored a dark shade of red are bare.
My little sister is learning to become a number at school. She received her first report card with all straight 90’s, but the girl who sits behind her had all straight 95’s. She clearly didn’t try hard enough, she believes.
My brother just entered high school, but he’s already stressed about what he’s going to do after college.
My father’s footsteps sound heavier on the wooden stairs of our house when he comes home from work now and his body looks tired.
My friends go to bed feeling empty and twist and turn in their sheets before they fall asleep from complete exhaustion and wake up restless.
I operate like a robot and have absolutely no control over time. It seems to be slipping from my fingers like the wind and I can’t trail behind it.
That is the way it is for most people.
We live in a constant cycle that repeats every day and the color of our lives becomes duller as we grow.
One day we’ll wake up being seventy and think, “Where did my life go?”
It went a little like this:
When you were born, you were born with curiosity burning in your veins. The sound of it was heard loud and clear when you giggled as a toddler and it slowly became inaudible when you became a teenager. In fact, the fire nearly burned out completely when you reached adulthood.
But it’s not out yet.
It doesn’t blow out until your heart stops working.
As long as your lungs expand and deflate, stardust production continues in your blood.
You can’t change the past.
You can’t correct the errors you made or pretend they’ve never occurred.
You can never find true happiness if you are always looking for it.
Live in this very minute.
Damn it, don’t think about what happens next. What happened before.
If somebody broke your heart, tell them.
Kiss the hell out of the one that makes you happy.
Call up that relative you swore you hated but haven’t heard from in a while and ask them how they are.
Take out that shirt from your closet that you bought because it was pretty and wear it, even if you think it doesn’t look great on you.
Drink more water in the day even if you don’t feel thirsty.
Put down your phone and step outside for a few minutes and just breathe.
Stare at the moon, the stars, the clouds as they drift onwards.
Watch the sunrise and the sunset by yourself and listen to soft music when you do it.
Take long showers and touch yourself gently.
Stop believing that a low grade defines your intelligence and learn to appreciate your hard work when you’ve put it in.
Make sure to give yourself a break when you need it.
Hug your friends for a minute longer and remind them that you love them.
Change your vocabulary from “I can’t” to “I can”.
Be open to pain and letting go of it.
Scream at the top of your lungs when the world is sitting on your shoulders.
Set fire to the dreams you couldn’t achieve and with the ashes form a new path.
Make your life one that is worth being proud of.
That you can feel satisfied with once you are taking your last breaths.
You have always been making choices on your own—It is up to you to make the best ones.
— LIVE LIKE YOU ARE GOING TO DIE TOMORROW