and-then-i-went-to-google

anonymous asked:

One time I was at the lgbtqia soc and I hit it off w this girl good yeh and I went back to her flat to go down on her but I fell asleep in her bed instead like my google review would be 0/10 worst hookup ever

OR…BEST HOOKUP EVER free naps and cuddles

(assuming she fell asleep w you and you cuddled)

tag people and know them better and stuff

best dad xiggymatsu​ tagged me and im do it

Name:  liz (hoe)
Time and date: 9:34pm uhh june 29
Average hours of sleep at night: 4-6 if i go longer im sleepdrunk

Last thing I googled:  ACTUALLY THIS IS RELEVANT TO LIKE EVERYONE WHO FOLLOWS ME I GOOGLED “JJMAXUS” BC rainbowsvomitwhat​ SHOWED ME THESE CUTEASS ONE PIECE SOCKS AND YOU CAN GET THEM FROM THERE FOR 12.88 (PLUS SHIPPING I ASSUME) http://www.jjmaxus.com/collections/jjmax-womens-collection/products/onepieceset

LOOK AT THESE THINGS god so cute im ughh im getting them

okay anyway

Birthday: december 28th
Gender: im …… i havent … i uhhh im not a boy 

Sexual orientation: im down 

Height: 5′4

Favorite color: yellow and grey its a tie
One place that makes me happy: my fckn bed. and my private liz room. and my car
Favorite movie: im listing them all i dont care>> boondock saints, the secret garden, jurassic park, pacrim, pride and prejudice … and then the lotr trilogy above all those 
What I am wearing right now: my dads sweatpants and this hoodie i always wear to clean the house in. and a shirt that says pipe camp
Most used phrases: 


What I last said to a family member: “i’ll see you sometime soon”
Favorite beverage: coffee and orange gatorade 
Favorite food: i really like salads and chicken tortilla soup and pf changs lmao
Last movie I watched: jesus uhhh … uh hh hhhh… OH mad max (for the third time lmfao whatever)
Dream vacation: idk im not rly picky i’d like to see a lot of places
Dream wedding: haha nah not for me

Dream pets: i already have the dream pet 

xiggymatsu can attest to this … they’ve met him… his name is atlas and he’s a border collie and a terrible genius and he’s my son he just turned 5 and i love him

Dream job: something with writing and/or art.. im working on it


okay! tagging… spinepile rainbowsvomitwhat luffys-hat portgas-dee-ace eudaimonarisornae doublesencho kumiko-sama-chan kikokus blackbarbooks do it if yall are feeling it !! 

fucked up hell cat: the thrilling conclusion

vayus​ Kaine,

after going through 40 pages of google image search results and viewing around 412 results, I think it’s about time to make some educated guesses about the demon cat

I originally went chasing after hell cat (snart for now) to see if I could find out when his picture began spreading around the web, find out about his owner, and, most important, find out what the fuck was going on in that picture. I didnt get anywhere near that, but what I found was almost half as interesting. stay tuned.

  • as for the age of the picture I can’t say for certain, but the earliest pictures of snart date back to 2009. 
  • snart’s picture has still been circulating web up until this very day, albeit at a very slow pace. this is unusual, especially considering how freaky the picture is
  • snart is mainly feautured on humour sites, and on random peoples blogspots. the image has been resized and captioned for humorous effect
  • snarts picture is very popular on humor blogs in portuguese, spanish, and especially russian which leads us to our next point 
  • the fucked up hell demon cat likely originated from a russian humour blog. the earliest blogs I find that featured snart were a bunch of russian (and one portuguese, I think) blogs from 2009. naturally this leads me to assume matt is behind this
  • it’s very possible snart is dead. 
  • the reason why I dont have many concrete answers to this is because Im pretty sure I would have to snort the rest of my adderall before I could make some sense of this mess. hopefully this confuses you even more

sharctopus asked:

is it okay if i ask why you were in the hospital?

oh yeah totally dw about it

that’s either a long story or short story so i’ll try to kinda,, meet it in the middle i guess,, so it’s not long af but still makes sense

i went to the hospital a few weeks ago with all the signs of appendicitis (if you dont know what that is i can explain it if you want or you can google it) but after a lot of test they told me it wasn’t appendicitis and that i should go home and i’ll get better

so i went home and even though i had a fever of 103 for a week or so i did get better

then on the saturday b4 fathers day shit got really bad and i went to the normal doctors on monday and got my blood drawn and my white blood cell count was at 29,000 where average normal is at 11,000 so i got sent straight to the ER that day for the same tests i had to take the last time i was there

and it took a longgggg time for them to realize what happened to me/what was going on, like, a couple days actually.

basically, i’m in the beginning stages of appendicitis, and they werent able to notice it when i was at the hospital the first time. they sent me home, yeah, and there was a little hole in my appendix, and it kind of,,,, leaked,,, all of the gross stuff inside of it out into my body where it grew and spread into a huge painful infection. they think the hole sealed itself but i’m not sure

so i was at the hospital this time because of the infection caused by my appendix leaking, they had to do a mini surgery and put a drain into my abdomen (it’s still there even though i’m home, earliest i can get it out is tmrw but probably not) and the drain is there to drain the infection caused by my appendix out of my body, that way it will be safe for me to have the appendicitis surgery in a couple of weeks

sorry that was long, and i hope it made sense ;-;

phospenumbra

Cuz I can only write in short bursts ^^U.

Killua will be about 23 in this. He’s in college working at some boring office and he’s just overwhelmed with reality and life. Grandpa Zeno has just passed away and Killua’s the only grandchild who really cared to preserve some of his belongings. Killua’s always loved fantasy and the supernatural but he gave it up for years due to school and just having to grow up. 

[[disclaimer: don’t know latin and i used google translate. just focus on the coolness of the gibberish]] 

====Update: So this fic went to crap and idk what happened when I tried to finish it so it turned out kinda awkward. I WAS GOING FOR CREEPY DAMN IT. But yeah, you know I wanted a demon fic. Screwed it up but here ya go! ====

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The heavy book fell with a loud thud disturbing the dust around it. Killua followed suit, slumping onto the ground with his legs crossed as he flipped open the hard cover. He took a moment to stare at the first page, a messy warning scribbled over the thick print. Blue eyes read over the red ink, part of his mind reprimanding himself for what he was about to do, but the other part of him - the more curious side- won by a landslide and his fingers took the thin page and flipped the warning out of sight. 

He flipped through the first few pages before growing bored of the simple spells and incantation and directing his attention to the thicker, later half of the book where he figured the more difficult spells were sure to be. He opened the book up to a random page and skimmed quickly, page after page, until his eyes froze on the words he’d been searching for, dendo de creaturae noctis.

Blue eyes gleamed with dangerous curiosity, Killua’s heart rate increasing as he traced the dark words with his index finger feeling the texturized page give off soft traces of obscure magic. He swallowed the little fear he had left and took a deep breath. 

Part of him didn’t expect this to work - what was a moldy old book left forgotten in his grandfather’s attic - but at the same time he prayed to the heavens that it would. Killua longed for something different, something apart from the daily routine of getting up, going to school, working, dealing with family and going to bed just to start the process all over again. It was draining, damn right killing him slowly. Killua swore he was going insane if not now later.

Keep reading

thejunesky said: I don’t know a single person who’s used that without breaking out or developing blisters. why are they selling paint stripper disguised as face wash????

I didn’t even realize this was a problem! I thought it was solely due to my incompetence. But I just googled it and looks like lots of people have bad reactions to it. I bought it because when I went to see my dermatologist about my acne last year, she recommended it. But I use the acne.org products and have good results from them, so I ignored her suggestion. Good grief. And I just read Neutrogena tests on animals, so I want to take a flying leap off of a bridge for giving Johnson & Johnson approximately $6 for this garbage product.

Was talking about tattoos with mummy mole earlier and I told her about the next one I want to get (a feather quill down the side of my left arm) and she asked if I’d ever get one in memory of my dad and I was like I don’t know what I’d get and she simply went “get a kettle or a teapot because the last thing you did when he was alive was make him tea, and it was the first thing we did after he died and I think he’d like that because he drank so much bloody tea it’d be a good way of remembering him”

So now it’s 11:30 at night and I’m googling teapot/kettle tattoos ha

I read a forum that was for cam models and how to preserve their safety.

A guy went into detail about how to be safe. A girl can’t even have a visible logo showing. If it’s a school shirt, he can easily go to the location of the campus and find you. If you bring the camera outside at all and he sees the house number, he can input it into google and street view every house until he finds the matching colors. If you casually mention you work at a veterinarian’s office and he thinks you go to a specific school based on the hoodie hanging on the bedpost, he can search up the vet offices in the area. If you have a tattoo, it will be easier to identify you. Post a normal selfie onto your cam Twitter that’s also on your private Facebook? Reverse image search and get your other profiles.

Girls can’t even go online without someone going above and beyond just to get their home address. Cam girls are recorded and put on tube sites. Websites are dedicated to posting personal photos of girls in hopes that guys will find their porn lookalikes or amateur stuff they did.

Some people think it’s ridiculous to assume someone will go to those lengths to get your info but it happens. It’s not as uncommon and all it takes is one manipulative person or pervert to ruin a girl’s life and love for the Internet, which has danger lurking everywhere

on my bday I went to leech some wifi and the Google doodle was a bunch of cakes and I was like ‘oh neat what’s this for’ and i hovered over it and it said “Happy Birthday Vicky!” and I cannot fucking begin to describe the fear, the ice-cold wave of unmitigated terror that rushed through me for a full three seconds before it registered in my mind that I have a gmail account and thus it knows my bday and that its just a conditional doodle that only I can see but I was afraid

I was so afraid

I almost had a heart attack- my friend started a new file on inquisition because he wanted to try the PS4 and when I went to log on my file it wasn’t there at all and I spent 5 minutes grieving a wasted 90 hours of my life when I finally found a forum on google that says you have to hit “switch characters” in the load menu and it worked and now I’m ready to die

Happy birthday Ken!!

they grow up so fast ; u;

I am in the office, and I’ve been relegated to using the spare laptop because the computer I normally use is being an absolutely raging dick, and I had a little look at the browser history to try and find an old thing wot I needed, and GUYS

do you remember the day I was tasked with keeping my boss’ 11 year old son occupied and I traumatised him with parasites (not my own parasites)

I have just discovered that on that very same day, after I had told him about Medusa, he’d GOOGLED ‘GREEK MYTHOLOGICAL BEASTS’ AND ‘GREEK MYTHOLOGY MEDUSA’ AND ‘SNAKE CREATURES MYTHS’

I am such a good influence, you guys

also he then went on to play a mermaid dress up game, which is fucking hilarious to me because I have known this kid since he was literally 4 years old and he drew a picture of me as a mermaid, and I’m genuinely really happy that mermaids are still a huge part of his life

“why doesnt fall out boy tour with twenty øne piløts?”
-because they already have? they need to be different.
“no they havent?”
- uh ,, the save rock & roll tour, 2013.
“no they didnt? they were with panic!”
-YEAH AND TWENTY ØNE PILØTS
“prove it”

-

ok one,, i went. two,, heres a thing i stole off the stage when i went back the next day. three,, google the sr&r tour??? i mean??? dont be stUpid 😅☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️

sorry for mini rant bUT UGH

youtube

filiandkiliheirsofdurin So I figured that since Richard was in ‘Cats,’ he must be a pretty good dancer, so I went ahead and googled “Richard Armitage dancing.” 

Dear sweet jebus am I glad I did.