Preschool AU: characters as things my students say to me
Bitty: *screaming* THE ORANGES ARE JUICY AND ROUNNNND!
Jack: *holding up a red plastic spider* it’s Spider-Man! He slings WEBS!
Holster: (Teacher asks him to please stop jumping on the table) Cash me outside how bout dat.
Ransom: *recites all of Moana verbatim while the movie is playing*
Lardo: *while wearing a Hello Kitty shirt and holding a beanie baby* wanna fiGHt?
Shitty: (Teacher asks him what makes the magnets stick together) Rainbows!
Dex: *cuddling a pile of resin cast insects* These guys can sting and pinch.
Nursey: I smell BANANAS! (Teacher asks how they smell) With their NOSES!
Chowder: (Teacher helps him get a paper towel out of the dispenser) I’m so proud of you. (Teacher is like…thanks???)
Ford: (Teacher asks her to describe a goat) It goes oooOooOOhh. (Teacher, baffles, asks her where a goat my live) In an old spooky house?
Tango: *playing with big plastic forest animals* This is a bear. (Teacher hands him a beaver and asks what it is) A hamster!
Whiskey: (sees roofers fixing the shingles on the school roof and is DISTRAUGHT) They’re breaking MY SCHOOL! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!
Kent: (Teacher asks him what the best part of being a kid is) Scaring my friends *makes claw hands and runs screaming through the room*
Ollie: I love t-rexes they’re my favorite. (Teacher says she thinks they’re scary, they’re her least favorite) *reaches up and tenderly holds her face between his little hands so she’s looking st him* it’s okay they’re all dead now.
Tater: *chatters all the time but has never spoken an intelligible word in his life. Parents joke that he speaks Chinese.*
Citizens of Asgard were confused as they watched the two omega
girls run through the city towards the palace. Rose and Freya couldn’t get out
of school quick enough. That was them finally finished with school, forever, and
they were going to see their Alphas train in the training ring.
When they got there, it was just in time. They watched from
the stands to start with as Loki and Baldur were practicing with some Asgardian
3: Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.
Hooo boy okay this is the short version of the story but basically my freshman year of college I had a crush on this girl who was super sweet and funny and then we became good friends but she transferred and we didn’t keep in touch and haven’t spoken since ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.
WELL I have a lot but basically my appearance is a pretty big one. It used to be mostly about my weight but that’s starting to bother me less as a whole and now it’s gone on to other things like how my face looks like a potato unless you’re viewing it from one very specific angle from a certain distance and that my hair is boring and thin and that the skin on my neck and under my arms looks bad because of a genetic condition all that jazz but hey it’s fine I’m fine
9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.
Okay this is good now that I’ve basically ripped apart my entire appearance I should focus on some things that I do like… hmmmmmmm…
Well for one I have pretty nice lips, my mom always says things like “no lipstick? you should wear lipstick more often, you have such nice plumpy lips, people inject shit into their lips to get them nice and full like yours but you have it naturally”
My teeth are okay, I’ve never needed braces.
I guess my eyebrows are a nice shape, I’ve never really needed to do anything to them (even though I kinda wish they were a little darker).
My hands are pretty great since they’re good at drawing things and writing things with neat handwriting and playing instruments and typing so fast that a typing game once mistook me for a bot
Oh also my voice is pretty nice, I use it to sing which I’m apparently pretty good at and also I’ve been told I have good control over my vocal folds which was one of the weirdest compliments I’ve ever received but still valid
And uhhhhh this is cliche I guess but I like my boobs and butt lmao
And finally I guess my brain deserves some honorable mention because even though it can be an insecure and anxious fuck sometimes, it’s pretty damn smart and creative and funny.
It’s funny how I can point out so many little things that I like but at the same time I can be so unsatisfied with my appearance as a whole lmao
Congratulations you’ve unlocked some of my tragic backstory