laughing because if I ever become rich I’m going to pay each neighbor to let me order pizza at their house and I’ll do it until the same driver has seen me at every house on my road with a different dog each time. Maybe I’ll switch it up, wear glasses at a few of the houses, fake piercings, subtle things that change my appearance but don’t make me unrecognizeable.

anonymous asked:

The reason people demand more taxes on the rich and less on the poor is because the rich pay people to evade taxes in quite a few occasions resulting in BILLIONS of dollars not going to the government and then the poor people don't have much money to begin with so they get fucked up the ass by capitalism because 'it's a free market' and they don't need basic human sustenance, right?

The taxes from the top 1% make up 40% of the government’s budget.

Capitalism is the only economic system that allows social mobility and allows people to become rich if they try hard enough. 

And the “they don’t need basic human sustenance” makes no sense. Do you go out and purify your own water, grow your own meals, or drill your own oil? No? Then the reason you pay for water/oil/foood is because you are paying for someone else to do it for you. Simple as that.

Straight White Boy Problem #828

bro: the wolf of wall street is the best movie of all time. that movie has given me so much hope for my future. i will become a rich businessman so i can party with models, drink expensive booze and make a lot of money by cheating the stock market.

me: dude….i know “The Wolf of Wall Street” was good, but you and I both know that this movie has given the most garbage kids hope for their future. cheating Wall Street is NOT realistic due to tighter SEC regulations on the stock market! ALSO the Wolf of Wall Street isnt as good as movies like Dodgeball (starring Vince Vaughn), Caddyshack, The Hangover, and any Will Ferrell movie in existence

The rarest most fabulous Pepe. Rumor has it that if you stare at it for eight minutes you will become a rich pink Pepe.

i FINALLY put up my first t-shirt/phone case etc. design after wanting to do some for a few months and idc if no one buys it because it sucks but i FINALLY started and i will keep going

‘wolf of wall street’ starters;

requested by sxlongshadow;

  • “I’m not fucking leaving! The show goes on!”
  • “I am not gonna die sober!”
  • “Let me tell you something. There’s no nobility in poverty.”
  • “I’ve been a rich man and I’ve been a poor man. And I choose rich every fucking time.”
  • “Give them to me young, hungry, and stupid.”
  • “Let me give you some legal advice: shut the fuck up!”
  • “I’ll tell you what: I’m never eating at Benihana again. I don’t care whose birthday it is.”
  • “If I’m not mistaken, you just tried to bribe a federal officer.”
  • “Fucking smoke crack with me.”
  • “I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich!”
  • “You got my money taped to your tits, honey. Technically, you do work for me.”
  • “How many times a week you jerk off?“
  • “And you know what else, Daddy? Mommy is just sick and tired of wearing panties.”
  • “But the question is: Was all this legal?”
  • “They’re gonna have to send in the national guard if they wanna take me down.”
  • “I fucked her brain out. … For eleven seconds.”
  • “You want a beer, pal?”
  • “It wasn’t just about the sex either. ____ and I get along. I mean, we had similar interests and shit.”
  • “People say shit. I mean, like, you married your cousin, or some stupid shit.”
  • “This isn’t funny, you gotta untie me, buddy.“
  • “I think you have a fuckin’ drug problem.”

This is the year I’m turning sixteen.

This is the year I finish 9th grade and start 10th.

This is the year I do a lot of random things that I can’t explain.
This is the year that I grow out of the meh and into the badass that I kinda am.

anonymous asked:

I can see you becoming a rich and famous makeup artist, one of those high class sought-after ones that are just so insanely talented. Is that what you're interested in pursuing?


Dear Taylor,

My name is Sally, I’m fourteen and I’m Irish. I’ve been a swiftie for about 3 years. The first one of your songs I ever listened to was Love Story. As soon as I heard it, I realised it was the same one I’d heard on the radio a few years earlier and loved. I then listened obsesively to Speak Now (since that was the only album of yours I had) and soon after listened to all your other songs. I was completely enchanted by your incredibly insightful lyrics and beautiful songs. 

Not long after, I decided to learn to play guitar. I was so inspired by your path to stardom that I wanted to follow you there. Of course, I wasn’t really thinking seriously on becoming rich and famous, but it would certainly be something really fun to try. So for my twelfth birthday I got a guitar and began learning. I practised for hours everyday and soon became quite good. 

Playing guitar has opened a door I never knew existed before in my life. If I feel sad, I play guitar, if I feel happy, I play guitar, if I’m angry, I play guitar. Whenever I have any free time, I play guitar. As you said, “People haven’t always been there for me, but music always has.” I mostly play your songs, but I play other bits and pieces as well, and write some of my own songs too.

In short, thank you so so much for inspiring me to learn this wonderful instrument. I don’t know what I would do without it and without you. I love you so much, thank you for brightening up my life.

With love to the moon and back, forever and always, 

From Sally xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

(Ps: I’m going to your show in Dublin on the 29th of June. I’m standing in section GA2, entrance 1 and I’m ticket number G2 943. I’m going dressed as a swiftie cat! It’s going to be my first concert, and also my first time seeing you in real life, and I’m crazily excited! I’m scoring off the days on my calendar! Love you so much!)

“If Sofia didn’t mary CP she would her future wouldn’t be so great. She barely went to Uni, and changed her career path too much. What career would she have? It’s not like she was going to become a rich doctor or lawyer. However if kate didn’t marry Will she would be fine, she comes from a rich family and went to a good school. She would have found a successful guy to marry. Sofia would probably be married to some shady, rough, blue collar dude since she’s not from a well to do family.” - Submitted by Anonymous