and the snakes start to sing

Break Up/Hate You List

1.       All I Wanted – Paramore

2.       All You Are Is History – State Champs

3.       Alphabet Boy – Melanie Martinez

4.       And the Snakes Start to Sing – Bring Me The Horizon

5.       Antivist – Bring Me The Horizon

6.       Avalanche – Bring Me The Horizon

7.       The Beach is for Lovers (Not Lonely Losers) – Neck Deep

8.       Big City of Dreams – Never Shout Never

9.       Blasphemy – Bring Me the Horizon

10.   Blessed With a Curse – Bring Me the Horizon

11.   Bored to Death – Blink 182

12.   Callout – Attila

13.   A Change of Heart – The 1975

14.   Cheap Shots & Setbacks – As It Is

15.   Circles – Pierce The Veil

16.   Coma - Issues

17.   Concrete – As It Is

18.   Dial Tones – As It Is

19.   Dial Tones (Acoustic) – As It Is

20.   December – Neck Deep

21.   The Divine Zero – Pierce The Veil

22.   Doomed – Bring Me the Horizon

23.   Drown – Austin Jones

24.   Drown – Bring Me The Horizon

25.   Empire (Let Them Sing) – Bring Me the Horizon

26.   Girls – The 1975

27.   Growing Pains – Neck Deep

28.   Hey! We Okay – Never Shout Never

29.   I Don’t Love You Anymore – Real Friends

30.   I Don’t Love You – My Chemical Romance

31.   I Hope This Comes Back to Hunt You – Neck Deep

32.   If I’m Lucky – State Champs

33.   It Never Ends – Bring Me the Horizon

34.   Just Another Girl – The Killers

35.   Kick Me – Sleeping With Sirens

36.   Kill All Your Friends – My Chemical Romance

37.

38.   No Future – Blink 182

39.   Oh No – Bring Me the Horizon

40.   Old Scars/Future Hearts – All Time Low

41.   Paris – The 1975

42.   A Part Of Me – Neck Deep

43.   Proving Grounds – Attila

44.   Rock Bottom – Neck Deep

45.   Run – Bring Me The Horizon

46.   Robbers – The 1975

47.   Sex – The 1975

48.   Serpents – Neck Deep

49.   She’s American – The 1975

50.   Smooth Seas Don’t Make Good Sailors – Neck Deep

51.   Somebody Else – The 1975

52.   Sucker for Pain – Imagine Dragons

53.   Summer – Real Friends

54.   Summertime Sadness – Lana del Rey

55.   Throne – Bring Me the Horizon

56.   Treat You Better – Shawn Mendes

57.   We Don’t Have to Dance – Andy Black

58.   Weight of the World – Crown the Empire

59.   Who Are You Now – Sleeping With Sirens

60.   Wild ft. Alessia Cara – Troye Sivan

61.    Wildest Dreams – Taylor Swift

62.   Young and Beautiful – Lana del Rey

Dear Gods, that's unsettling.

My party, Chaotic Good Tiefling Twins (Bard & Sorceress), a Chaotic Good Dwarf Cleric, a Chaotic Neutral Half-Orc Barbarian, a Lawful Evil Human Paladin and my Lawful Evil Yuan-Ti Warlock. We had to get past a boy into the house he was guarding , he was like 10 years old so the party was adverse  to killing him if they could help it.

Me: I got this, I cast “Sleep”.
DM: OK, how are you gonna cast it
Me: I start singing “Trust in Me” from the Jungle Book in a hissing snake voice
DM: The boy unknowingly starts to sway to the sound of your voice, eventually his eyes roll up in his head and he drifts into a sound sleep.
Tiefling Bard (Ooc): Why’d you sing? I thought you were a Warlock?
Cleric (Ooc): He is, he’s just creepy.

They left me to keep watch while they checked inside for what we were looking for. They came to find I had eaten the boy, Anaconda style.

Cleric: What the fuck dude!?
Me: In my defense, you left an unconscious child, unsupervised, with an evil snake man.
Cleric: OK, yeah that one’s on me.