and yet i must still wait

37 Mistakes I Made As A New Tarot Reader

I’d be lying if I said that I woke up one day and just knew all that there was to know about Tarot. During my journey as a new Tarot reader, I made a lot of “mistakes” and some fails. I’m putting mistakes in quotation marks because if it weren’t for these things I probably wouldn’t be the Tarot reader that I am today. I like to think that each one of these “mistakes” helped me gain a better insight into the type of reader I am. Along the way, I learned that my journey is mine and mine alone and no matter how authoritative the source of advice provided by someone else, I must ultimately do what feels right to me. I am not a perfect Tarot reader or learner by any means, and I believe this post shows a clear example of that.

Following The Rules

In the beginning, I read so many books and talked to many different readers who each had their own idea of the “right way” to read Tarot. I also had a huge fear that I was somehow using my deck the wrong way. I wish I would have known that there is no right or wrong way to read Tarot. What may work for one person may not work for the other and vice versa. I think that the amazing thing about divination is that each reader brings a little special part of themselves and their unique flavor to Tarot and that is incredible. I wish I would have been a more informed learner and allowed myself to form my own opinions instead of trying to follow someone else’s. No two readers are ever alike and they do not need to be either.

Meaning And Memorization Overload

I tried to learn and memorize all the Tarot card meanings overnight. While this may help some readers learn, I was not one of them. I quickly became frustrated and discouraged and it made learning Tarot into a chore. I set unrealistic goals for myself and I had such a difficult few months. I wish I would have taken my time to enjoy the experience of bonding with my cards and allowing the process of learning Tarot to develop and grow with me organically instead of trying to force it.

Lack Of Learning Plan

As I mentioned above, trying to memorize all the cards didn’t work for me. I was all over the place with my Tarot learning. I had several books all with competing ideas. Now when I go forward to learn a new aspect of Tarot I have a learning plan. It is something I wish I had done when I first started my Tarot journey as it would have kept me organized and left me with the ability to track my progress.

The Self Doubt Monster

I started off my Tarot journey excited and open to the possibility of growing as a person and learning about my life. As I mentioned above, I started feeling like I wasn’t good enough or that I would never truly grasp learning the cards. I had a lot of self-doubts and it led me to be depressed because Tarot was my first outlet of expression for me and I felt like I was bad at it. I wish I would have known that learning anything, especially Tarot takes time. I now know that my learning with Tarot will be a life long experience and I am okay with taking it one step at a time.

Do The Shuffle

One of my Tarot mentors told me that I had to shuffle my deck overhand four times, riffle shuffle three and cut the deck with my left hand three times so that my deck could be fully charged before a reading. It never really resonated with me but I still did it because I was told that was the way to do it. I wish I would have shuffled however and how many times I felt energetically pulled to do so. I now just riffle shuffle until I feel called to stop. Nothing fancy but it works.

Bonding

I never really resonated with sleeping with my Tarot deck but it seemed like that was what I was constantly being told to do when I started learning Tarot. I did it for a few night and felt like a failure because it just didn’t feel right. I wish I would have known that I could just talk to my deck, write poetry with it and even read for some of my favorite book characters as a way to bond with it. I wish I would have known that bonding is a personal practice and there is no one size fits all.

My Inner Skeptic

My uncles are very religious and when I started reading Tarot they made lots of negative comments that I was stupid for believing in a deck of cards. This negatively affected how I saw divination for a few months and led me to be skeptical of my findings no matter how helpful they were. I wish I would have kept an equal level of skepticism and belief when learning Tarot before others tried to discredit them.

Rituals And Sacred Spaces Oh My

I thought that in order to give the best possible readings to myself or to someone else I needed to perform an elaborate ritual before the reading started and after the reading ended. I also thought I needed a beautifully adorned space with lots of crystals, incense, and candles. It’s funny because I now read in places like coffee shops and bars and I do not really incorporate any set rituals into my practice because I don’t feel like I need to. I wish I would have just focused on the basics and then experimented with creating my own rituals if I felt called to do so instead of feeling like I needed to.

Readings On Repeat

Something that I would do early on was read for a single situation over and over again. I wanted to know all aspect of that particular subject but by pulling various cards. By doing that, the information either didn’t make sense anymore or it became extremely watered down. I wish I would have taken the time to read about one situation straight through and then come back at a later date and ask again if I still wanted more information.

Emotional Readings

I was told early on that I shouldn’t read Tarot when I was sad or depressed. One day I did just that and it helped me more than I knew it would. I wish I would have started to use Tarot more when I had a depression episode to help calm me down and aid me in my healing journey rather than putting my cards away when I needed them the most.

Fancy Schmancy Tools

I thought I needed a fancy silk scarf to wrap my cards in, an elaborate wooden box and expensive incense to purify my cards. Looking back now I want to slap myself. I wish I would have known that those things are all unnecessary in my practice and are just extras not must have’s. I now keep my decks in their original boxes or pencil cases which are both functional and cost effective.

Tarot System Overload

I thought that in order to be a true Tarot reader, whatever that means, I had to learn all the different systems. Imagine me, not fully able to comprehend one deck yet still trying to learn Thoth, Marseille, and Rider Waite Smith all at the same time. Needless to say, it was a disaster. Although I would have still explored the different systems, I would have chosen one to start with exclusively and get to know well before delving deep into another. This would have helped me to achieve a better handle on my Tarot learning.

Mirroring Other Readings

I really looked up to the way my mother and grandmothers read cards that I wanted to mirror how they read. I felt by doing so, I was honoring our family traditions. I quickly found that their style just wasn’t for me. I wish I would have just trusted that my own way of reading Tarot would develop over time instead of trying to mirror theirs.

The Waiting Game

Something that I think held me back was my decision to wait before reading for other people that weren’t my immediate family and friends. I had this mindset that I needed to be studying Tarot for so many years or be a resident reader at a metaphysical shop to be able to read Tarot for other people. I wish I would have allowed myself to take the chance earlier and start reading for strangers. I think this would have helped me become more comfortable in my reading ability and also provide me with the feedback I needed to become better. When I did finally take that plunge and start reading for others, it became the best decision I could have possibly made.

Tarot Certification

When I started learning Tarot, a few of my mentors and people I looked up to talked about Tarot certifications and that every reader should aspire to be “Tarot certified” whatever that meant. I wanted to become certified not because I wanted to learn but because I felt it was what everyone else was doing. I thought having a shiny certificate with my name on it was fancy and somehow would prove that I was an amazing Tarot reader. Looking back now, I am glad I never went through with a certification. It isn’t that I do not think it is valuable because for some readers it may very well be but for me personally it never resonated with me and me wanting it back then was for all the wrong reasons. I wish I would have known that I could still be a great Tarot reader with or without a certificate.

Oracle Deck Allowance

At the beginning of my Tarot journey, I never gave myself a chance to use Oracle cards. I think using oracle cards alongside Tarot readings adds such a fabulous new dimension and layer to an already insightful message. If I could go back, I would give myself permission to enjoy oracle cards as well.

Defining Myself

When I started my Tarot journey I allowed other people’s opinions and judgments to define me as a reader and how I viewed and utilized my Tarot cards. For some reason, I wanted other Tarot readers approval but that wasn’t me at all. I wish that I would have silenced all those things and just remained authentic to myself. The many opinions others had of me influenced how I read the cards and that is something I still am actively letting go of today.

Burning Out

When I started out with Tarot, I tried to learn as much as I could. I did Tarot reading after reading for myself and even offered some practice readings on free forums. Long story short, I ended up burning myself out. I wish I would have given myself the time to take a break from Tarot and allow my mind to process the information instead of tiring myself out.

The Comparison Game

When starting on my Tarot journey, I used to compare myself to other Tarot readers. Comparing yourself to other people is never a good feeling and I wish I could go back and focus on the skills and good qualities that I had as a reader instead of those that others had, that I lacked.

Being A Solo Reader

At the beginning of my Tarot journey, I didn’t really have a lot of friends. This wasn’t by choice as there weren’t lots of local metaphysical shops as there are now but I wish I tried harder to find people who were of a like mind. I connected with a lot of my Tarot peers through online forums like tarotforum.net and it helped me shape who I was as a reader. I didn’t stick with it though and continued most of my study solo.  The accessibility of social media that we have today is something that I do not take for granted because back then, connecting with other Tarot readers was so difficult, especially if you were a beginner.

Those Darn Book Meanings

When I would start reading for myself with the cards I heavily relied on the book meanings. I would go through either the little white book or one of my many Tarot books I had from the library and try to decipher the message. I wish I would have learned to trust my own intuition and create my own meanings of the cards.

Fear Of Being Wrong

When I first started reading for others I had this huge anxiety of steering people in the wrong direction when using the cards. I wish I would have been honest with myself and my reading style and instead of trying to focus on concrete predictions, I would have made the client feel empowered and provided choices and avenues they could consider so that they could ultimately make the choices instead of me trying to make the choices for them.

Meaning Fluidity

When I started learning the meanings of the cards I was rigid in how I interpreted them. I thought The Fool always meant new beginnings and Death was a drastic change no matter where it was in a Tarot spread. I wish I would have known that each Tarot card has a myriad of meanings and that one card can mean something completely different in the context of one reading versus another.  

Recording My First Readings

When I started out in my Tarot journey I did lots of readings for myself, my favorite book and television characters. I wish I would have written down or recorded my first readings so that I could now be able to see how much I have grown as a reader.

All Work, No Play

I took my Tarot study very seriously that I never allowed myself any time to just enjoy the process. I wish I would have given myself permission to experiment, have fun and be silly with my cards as I am now.

The Celtic Cross

I know, I know. There are some readers who swear by the Celtic cross as a great beginner Tarot spread. I, however, am not one of them. The Celtic cross was so intimidating to me when I first started out. There are ten spread positions and as a beginner, I felt like that was the only true spread I could use. I wish I would have stuck with pulling one to three cards to become more comfortable with reading before I jumped into a large spread like the Celtic Cross.

Cleansing The Deck

As a beginner Tarot reader, I thought I needed to cleanse my deck every time I gave someone else a reading because it is what so many other people told me was the “right” thing to do. I don’t ever cleanse my decks anymore. I mean okay that is a lie… I’ve cleansed one deck, in the last year because that deck was being a total buttface but other than that I don’t feel like I need to. I wish I would have known that how many times I cleansed my deck was personal to me and doing so should be my choice and how I felt instead of following other people and their way of doing things.

Living The Daily Tarot Life

After I consumed myself with Tarot for the first year I put it away and I quickly forgot everything I learned. I wish I would have incorporated Tarot into my daily life like I do now. Something as easy as pulling a card of the day for myself would have helped me still keep Tarot in the forefront without taking lots of time and energy.

Wrong First Deck

I felt like I had to read with the Rider Waite Smith, Thoth or Marseille because that is what the majority of what other readers were using. I wish I would have allowed myself the permission to choose my own deck based on what I liked and what felt right instead of succumbing to what I felt I needed to start with.

Those Darn Scary Cards

I admit, when I started learning Tarot I dreaded pulling the Death card, the Tower or even The Devil cards. They scared the crap out of me. I wish I would have known that each card within the Tarot has both a shadow and illuminated aspect and that there aren’t inherently “bad” cards within the deck. Knowing this early on would have helped me see that there can be empowerment in the tower and sadness in the sun card.

Reading Boundaries

One of the biggest mistakes I made when starting reading for others was to not set clear boundaries of the types of readings I was comfortable doing and the ones I wanted to stay clear from. I learned quickly to be upfront with anyone who wanted a reading from me about what type of reader I was, what type of questions I do not answer and what my ethics were. During my first year of reading for others, I did a lot of free practice readings. I made it a habit to let those know that I was still learning and that the reading provided was to help me grow as a reader while giving them insight but for them to take it with a grain of salt.

Fear Of Success

Once I was comfortable using Tarot to help myself and others, I began to somehow fear and sometimes even sabotaged my own successes. I doubted if what I was doing was even real and if I was indeed helping others, despite the glowing reviews and acknowledgments from others. I wish that I would have taken the time to sit with myself and understand my feelings of success and why it scared me so much.

Saying No No No

Once I started opening up to read for other people, my close friends and family members started asking for readings on an everyday basis. It got to the point that people only wanted to hang out with me so that I could read their cards. I wish I would have been firm and said no to my family and friends who abused my kindness and generosity while I was still learning.

Feedback And Criticism

I wish I would have known the difference between someone bullying me and giving constructive criticism. While I did face times where people discouraged, bullied and belittle me, I wish I would have taken the advice from those who provided constructive criticism and genuinely wanted to better me as a reader instead of seeing it as a personal attack.

Life Answers

During my first few tries with Tarot, I thought the cards held all the answers to my problems and would be able to tell me what to do with complete clarity. I learned rather quickly that Tarot was a guide and it was my choices and the commitment to those choices that made up my life. I wish I would have known to not rely on Tarot as an all-knowing oracle and instead use it as a tool for guidance in regards to me making my own decisions within my life.  

Using The Wrong Spread

When I wanted to expand my Tarot arsenal, I tried many different Tarot spreads. Because of the sheer amount of spreads I used to read for myself, it proved very difficult in keeping track of what Tarot spreads worked for me and what didn’t.  I wish I would have tested out spreads more thoroughly before using them to give myself readings instead of just assuming that it was going to answer my question perfectly. I also wish that I was selective in what spreads I used for certain question and had the courage to tweak them to fit my specific situation. I learned quickly that there are some spreads created for one specific purpose that may not necessarily work for another purpose and can give confusing results.

Wrong Questions

Throughout my early years of Tarot, I would sometimes dance around the issue I wanted to know about when performing a reading for myself. In the same respect, I would often ask questions that were disempowering to me and lead to me feeling anxiety with the question I was seeking insight for. I wish I would have taken the time to really focus my questions before starting a reading. I now know the importance of doing a reading that empowers and uplifts instead of leaving me to feel hopeless and defeated no matter what the answer is.


Post Notes:
Please do not remove the captions.
Title: Thirty-Seven Mistakes I Made As A New Tarot Reader
Copyright:  © Ivan Ambrose 2017
Disclaimer: I use the term mistake very loosely in this post as I am a firm believer that each one of my mistakes has helped shape me into the reader that I am today. What I may consider a mistake in my practice and as a Tarot reader may be something that is totally acceptable in your practice. Just because I viewed something as a mistake in my personal practice does not mean that that particular topic should not hold or cannot hold a place of validity and acceptance in yours. The premise of this post is to showcase some of the mistakes I believed I have made as a new Tarot reader. This may be different from your own and that is okay. This post in no way, shape, or form is intended to tell you how you must go about being a new Tarot reader but as a reflection of myself as someone who was once a new Tarot reader. The intention of this post is to share my experiences and my growth as a Tarot reader.  I encourage and open up this conversation to respectful debate and added commentary to supplement this post of any kind.
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Good Morning // Min Yoongi

-

the prompt: Can I request something really fluffy with BTS Suga? With kisses and forehead touches please! Thank you!!

words: 1009

category: fluffy fluff~

author note: this is full of fluff on fluff so please enjoy! (also, there is a huge thunderstorm outside of my house and it’s so loud haha)

- destinee


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2

Gemanimate 2!
color study

For those who don’t know yet, I’m participating on the second project of @gemanimate ! We’re reanimating the episode “the answer” and I’m responsible for the shot where sapphire says “Now, please wait here, I must attend to my duties” to the rubies! So I made the background inspired on the Book version of the answer and based on that got this color variations to choose. Still working on the rubies ;)

heartless

Summary: What will it take for him to let you in?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: language; angst - I am so sorry.

Word Count: 981

A/N: this is for my wife @bladebarnes‘ fic fest! my prompt was Too Good at Goodbyes, by Sam Smith. I recommend listening to the song while reading. || I missed writing for Bucky. Sadly, he is never safe in my hands. | masterlist


Originally posted by wintersthighs


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“I liked the building, not you.” PT.7

A/N: So like still pretty unsure of the conversations in this chapter but there’s no going back now. Again, SUPER HUGE thank you to @xbetter-than-wordsx for constantly being there to help me and guide me through my writers block. I don’t know what the hell I’d do without you girl. 

Paring: Shawn X Fan

Word Count: 9,333


I had my arms wrapped around my legs as I sat on the couch in the tour bus as everyone was chatting together.

We had left the arena for the next city a few hours after the show and it was late now, but no one seemed to be tired. The excitement of the show was still going through everyone but they all knew they needed to sleep.  One by one they all plucked off and got ready for bed, peaking out saying goodnight before they climbed up into their bunks and disappeared behind the curtain.

“I guess we should go to bed too?” I suggested, looking at Shawn as he sat on the other side of the table, he only needed to turn his shoulder to look at me.

“Yeah probably,” he answered quietly.

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Leave This Town Pt 8 (Mechanic!Bucky AU)

Characters: reader, Bucky, Wanda and Pietro (mentioned)

Summary: After leaving the small town life behind, you’ve worked hard to make your dreams come true. When something unexpected brings you home, you’re brought back to the place where everything changed. Timing is everything and now there just might be a second chance with the man you left behind.

Song Inspiration: Angela by The Lumineers

Warnings: Fluff!!!! 

Word Count: 3.4k

Tags are at bottom (TAG LIST IS CLOSED I’M SORRY)

**This fic is for @bionic-buckyb ‘s 5K AU Writing Challenge**

Y/N: Oof. 

<<<Part 7   Part 8   Part 9>>> 

Leave This Town Masterlist

Full Masterlist

____________________________________________

Originally posted by science

Previously: 

You waited a few minutes until the driver’s side door opened with a squeak and Bucky slid inside. Shaking his head, water droplets sprayed in your direction making you squeal in laughter while shielding your already damp self.

Bucky threw you a wide grin, feeling a familiar warmth inside you grow despite the chill seeping in from your wet clothes. He held out a hand and you gave him the keys with the engine roaring to life seconds later.

“Ready?”

“Ready,” you replied, wondering what this unexpected night would bring.

_____________

Conversation was impossible on the ten minute drive to Bucky’s place. The loud thundering of rain pelting the truck’s roof along with Bucky’s need to concentrate on the road with very little visibility, you resigned yourself to silence. You didn’t mind though. It gave you a chance to unabashedly stare at the man you hadn’t seen in two years, and yet you instantly still felt that comfort and ease in his presence.

Bucky was right, he hadn’t changed much. His hair was a bit longer with a few more laugh lines around his eyes, but you found that they made him even more attractive. One of your first observations, though, was the lack of a ring on his finger. That still wasn’t a definitive answer to a question you had yet to voice, though.

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Illegal (Part 2)- Park Jimin Racer!AU

Originally posted by totallyyehet

Genre: Fluff/ Comedy/ Angst

Pairing: JiminxReader

Word count: 5.000k

Summary: During your staying in your grandmother’s house you meet Jimin and discover the night life that’s beyond the calm appearence of the town.


“Jimin! They are looking for- Oh.” The browned haired guy stopped talking as soon as he noticed the girl kissing his cheek. You must have had a sad expression on your face because he sent you an apologetic smile, and stayed by your side during the whole scene.

You should have known better than to get attached to people by now. You have experienced all this before, and you knew the pain that you had felt, so why risk it all again?

You still were standing still, in the exact same position, looking at them. Jimin, however, had backed away from the girl and was scratching his neck nervously.

“Hey” The boy whispered “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” You answered. Your voice trembled a bit, much to yours distaste, but you kept a smile on your face anyways.

“Well” Jimin said, clearing his throat “Jungkook, you were saying?”

“Oh, yeah, some people said that they wanted to talk to you. About that stuff” The brown haired guy, whose name was Jungkook, said. The colours drained from Jimin´s face as soon as he finishes talking, and you couldn’t help but to wonder why.

The wind starts to blow stronger and some leaves started to get stuck on your hair. Jimin laughed at your sight and you blushed, looking down at the hem of your dress.

It was quiet among the four of you for a while, the only background noise being some people´s loud cheers and the sound of engines running. You had a thousand questions running through your head right now, about whom that girl was and why she had kissed him. It didn’t make any sense to you. You actually thought that maybe, just maybe, he liked you, but once again, you were wrong.

Jungkook started walking away from you, into the middle of the crowd and waved at Jimin, mentioning for him to follow him. Jimin sent you two a small smile before going after him, leaving you two alone behind.

It continued to be quiet for a while until she spoke up.

“I’m Peyton, by the way.” She smiled nicely at you.

“Y/N. It’s nice meeting you.” You smiled back.

“I know who you are, I have heard a lot about you.” You widen your eyes at her statement, but she didn’t seem to notice, as she continued speaking “He is very handsome, isn’t he?” She pointed at Jimin and you nodded shyly, agreeing with her. She had a sad tone to her voice, like she felt bad or had regretted something that had to do with him.

“He is” You finally answer, playing with your dress. You focus on Jimin for a while, on the way he was smiling at people, and how relaxed he looked in the middle of everyone. He seemed to be very popular around here, adored by all, and you couldn’t help but to think about what he had seen in you to want to get to know you better. There were a ton of interesting people in this town, with life story that could go behind your imagination, yet, he had chosen you, and you were confused by it.

“I still remember the first time he came up to me” She said. You could see that she really cared for him, from the way she talked to the way she looked at him.

You had this feeling that she didn’t knew about the way you felt towards Jimin to be talking about him like that, but again, neither did you.

“I-I got to go, it’s getting late and my grandma must be waiting for me at home.” You said while starting to walk away. You brushed your hair behind your ears and smiled at her, apologetically. Even though you wanted to wait for Jimin and Jungkook to say goodbye to them, you just couldn’t handle the fact of Peyton talking about him like that without feeling a pain in your chest.

“Can’t you just stay for a few more minutes? I love your company!” She pleaded, battling her eyelashes at you. You had to admit that she was a very pretty person, with blonde hair and chocolate brown eyes, no wonder that Jimin liked her.

“I’m sorry but I really have to go. But it was very nice talking to you!” You said and walked away.

It was starting to get a bit cold and you regretted coming out here without bringing a coat with you. You rubbed your hands up and down your arms in hopes of warming yourself up while you thought about what had happened.

The way Jimin talked to you and looked at you, allied to what the green haired boy had said, made you feel like he did, in  fact, cared about you, and if you even dared to say, liked you. However, there was this whole Peyton thing. She was a very sweet girl, and nice too, and from the little talk you had with her you could see that she really liked Jimin. And he seemed to be found of her too, by the way he had reacted to her kiss.

It was at time like this that you would like to have Taehyung around, to just talk this all out. It may not seem like this for other people due to the fact that he is a bit air headed, but he is great at listening and giving advices.

You thought about calling him because you knew that he would pick up – he always stayed up late looking for new animal species on Wikipedia- but it was already late, and you were very tired.

You tried to walk as fast as you could to your grandmother’s house since you hated walking alone, especially at night.

The whole town had so much more to it than you imagined, so much life. It was a beautiful sight now that you think about it, with the lights, the people and the adrenaline.

You knocked on your grandma’s door and prayed that she was still awake, otherwise, you would have to sleep on the little wooden bench that she had on her front porch.

“Y/N? Is that you darling?” A voice said from the living room as you opened the door. She was sitting on the couch in her purple nightgown, watching the late night shows on Food Network.

“Yeah, it’s me, grandma.” You answered.

“So?” She asked, excited “How was it, your date?”

She patted the spot next to her on the couch as if mentioning for you to sit down next to her. The look of tiredness in her eyes seemed to disappear the moment you sat, cross legged, besides her.

“First, it wasn’t a date. And second, everything went just fine.” You said, relaxing your back against the sofa. You didn’t know whether or not you should tell her about the race, since you were almost sure that that wasn’t something they wanted other people to know about. Even if it was your grandfather that had taught him that.

“Whatever you say” She threw her hands in the air as a sign of defeat. “But, did you two kissed?”

“What?! Grandma!” You covered your face in embarrassment.

“What? Did you or not?”

“No!”

“You two are no fun! The first time your grandfather invited me somewhere, he kissed me right on the first minute. I slapped him away, but at least he made a move!”

You lay your head on her shoulders as she patted you lovingly on your head. She runs her wrinkled fingers through your hair and you close your eyes, relaxing at her touch.

“If my dad calls, don’t tell him about Jimin and all of this, me going out and such” You plead “He might get a heart attack if he gets to know that.”

“Okay sweetie”

“Thanks. I don’t want him to get worried unnecessarily.”

The both of you stayed like that for a while, not moving a single muscle. It felt good being next to your grandmother. She and your dad were the only people you allowed yourself to get attached to. And Tae has well, of course.

After your mother left you, your grandma called every day to check up on you. She was there during the whole things, right next to you and your father in case of any of you fell down again. And you were grateful for that.

“It’s getting a bit late, don’t you think?” Your grandmother said pointing at the clock that she had on the living room’s wall.

“Yeah, I’m going to go to bed now. Night grandma” You responded, kissing her cheek.

You get off the sofa and walk up the stairs, towards your bedroom. Changing tor your pyjamas and after brushing your teeth tiredly, you hop inside your bed, adjusting yourself to the covers and your head to your pillow.


“Glad you remembered my existence” Taehyung said into the phone speaker. You were laying flat back on your bed, staring at the ceiling, bored out of your mind when you decided to call him.

“What? Don’t tell me you were missing me already?” You joked.

“Oh, you could tell?” He laughed. You hear the sound of a woman’s voice in the background indicating that he was at his house, probably for his little brother soccer match, otherwise he would be at his apartment playing some random video games. Or Overwatch. That boy was crazy for Overwatch.

“Anyways” You hear him say “How is everything around there? Found someone to replace me yet?”

“I could never replace you, otherwise I wouldn’t have someone to pester me all day”

“Glad to know that” He replied.

“But I’ve met some cool people that I think you would like to be friends with. One of them pestered me so much yesterday that it reminded me of you.” You laugh. It was starting to be a little bit dark inside your room so you decide to get up and open the curtains more.

“Really? You have to introduce that person to me so that we can form an Annoy-Y/N-Association. But really, what is he like?”

“Well, his name is Park Jimin and- “ You start saying but get interrupted right away.

“Wait a minute. “his name”? Is he a boy? What does your grandmother think about that?”

“She loves it, even a little bit too much. She had even asked me if we had kissed yet.” You say.

“Well, and did you?” He pressed. When were you going to learn to keep your mouth shut.

“No, we are just friends. Besides, I think he likes someone else, and that person likes him too.” You say, sitting against the headboard.

“Oh, I’m sorry” He said.

“Don´t be, you didn’t do anything.” You laughed “Now tell me, what have you been up to?”

“You know, the usual. Nothing new ever happens around here. Do you know when you are coming back?” He asked.

“I still don’t know, two months, maybe? I want to make up to my grandmother for all the times I couldn’t visit, you know?”

“Yeah I see” He says and you her some muffling voices in the background” Look, Y/N, I would love to talk to you more but I have to go, my brother is being a pain in my ass. Call me if you need anything, okay? And don’t hesitate!”

“Don’t worry, I will. Bye Tae” You smiled even though you knew that he couldn’t see you.

“Bye Y/N, take care” He says and then hangs up.

You turn your phone off and put it on your jean’s back pocket. You let yourself stand still on the bed for a bit longer than necessary, breathing slowly with your eyes closed, before deciding to get out of your bedroom.

Your grandmother was outside, gardening, wearing a big yellow hat and some gardening gloves. She was watering the roses and cutting some of them out, along with their thorns, so that she could put them in the living room. You sat on the bench that was on the front porch and crossed your legs. You used to sit outside all day back at your home with your mother before she left. She used to tell you some of the small adventures she had lived and about the countries she had visited. Some other times she would invite you to go and help her around in the garden, which always resulted in the two of you getting wet by the hose.

“Oh, you are out here already?” Your grandmother asked, cleaning the sweat of her forehead with her hands.

“Yeah, Taehyung had to end the call so… Do you need any help?” You offer.

“No, no, it’s okay. I can do it.” She said. “But darling could you do me a tiny favour?”

“Yeah”

“Could you go to the kitchen and bring me a glass of water?” You nodded in response. Your grandma starts to hum a song to herself as you got up and walked inside.

It’s around four in the afternoon and the sun is up high. There are a lot of people outside, walking around, and stooping here and there to great her, and some of them actually asked if she needed any help, which she always declined.

You open the fridge and take out a bottle of cold water. Opening one of the cupboards, you take out one glass and fill it up.

By the time you get outside you notice someone talking to your grandma.

“There she is” She says, pointing at you. The minute she steps away from the person, you come face to face with someone very familiar. Park Jimin.

“Hey, I was just asking her about you.” He smiled “I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come and hang out with us.”

“Us?” you asked, confused.

“Yeah, me, Jungkook, Yoongi, Peyton and some others.”

“Oh,” You felt divided. On one hand you wanted to go and hang out with them since it seemed fun and they were very nice people to be around. On the other hand, there was this whole Jimin thing that you were trying to figure out. “I don’t know. My grandma needs me here and-“

“Nonsense” She interrupted. You didn’t even realize she was standing right behind you. “Y/N, you should go, have fun. Don’t worry about me, I‘ll be fine”

She shushed you out of her house with her gardening gloves and next to Jimin, and you couldn’t help but to laugh at her actions. You tried to argue as she did so, but it didn’t work out. Jimin didn’t say anything during the whole scene, as he just stayed back and watched with a big grin on his face.

“Don’t forget to call if you need anything!” She yelled when you and Jimin started to walk away.

“You left me quite worried last night ” He said after a while.

“Why?” You furred your eyebrows in confusion.

“When I went back, I didn’t see you anywhere. I asked Peyton about you and she said that you had already left”

“Oh, that. It was getting late and I got to go to my grandmother’s. And I didn’t tell you anything because I didn’t want to bother you. Besides, I’m a big girl, you know?” You joked.

Unexpectedly, Jimin stopped as grasped your arm with his hand, pulling you back and making you collide with his chest. He slid his hand under your chin and you blushed at the contact. Embarrassed by your reaction, you tear your eyes away from him and focus on the ground.

“Hey” he said, tilting your chin up so that you were looking at his eyes. “Look at me. You would never in a million years, be a burden to me. I care about you, okay? And the idea of you walking around, alone at night, it just… If anything had happened to you I could never forgive myself.”

Your heart started to beat hard against your ribcage and your face became really hot. You have never blushed this hard in your entire life.

“Do you understand?” He asked, his eyes going back and forth between yours. You simply nodded in response, not trusting your voice. “Good”

He stepped away from you and kept walking as if nothing had happened- You, however, stayed still since you were a bit taken aback by his actions, so it took you a while to catch up with him.

“So,” He stated “Did you choose a favourite colour already?”

“I have thought about it” You say.

“You have?” Jimin asked, surprised, and you hummed in response. “So, have you decided on one yet?”

“No” You simply answered, shrugging.

“What do you mean with “no”?” He stopped in front, with his arms stretched out and eyes wide open. The people that were walking pass the two of you were giving Jimin some funny looks, but he stayed still, not bothered by it.

“There are a lot of colours in the world, how do you want me to choose just one? Especially this quick?” You answer, dodging his arms and continuing to walk straight ahead on the sidewalk.

“So, that means that you are still thinking about it?” He ran after you with a hopeful look in his eyes.

His orange hair seemed brighter than the usual under the sunlight and his skin looked more tanned, more beautiful. However there was this thing that he always had and that never changed, his smile.

“Yup.”

“Thank God” He sighed, dramatically, with his hand on his chest.

He took out a pair of round sunglasses and put them on his face. Jimin started to walk closer to you, to the point where he put his arm around your shoulder, making a hint of colour to start taking place on your cheeks.

“Let’s try this again, and I hope that you have an answer to this one. So, Y/N, tell me, do you have a favourite animal?” He said, stretching his arms behind his head and ruffling his hair.

“As a matter of fact, I do.” You stated and stuck your tongue out at him.

“Then tell me woman, you are killing me here.” He said, excited.

“Ducks”

“What?” He asked.

“Ducks are my favourite animals” You repeat.

“See this is what I am talking about. I’m trying to like you, I really am. But you are making that impossible to me.” He groaned.

“What do you mean?” You ask, confused. You had no idea about what you had done wrong. He asked you a question and you simply answered it.

“You like ducks. How can you like ducks?”

“So, let me get this straight. You can’t fully like me because my favourite animals are ducks?” You laughed. He certainly was something else.

“Yeah. Ducks are evil creatures with tiny wings.” He exaggerated.

“No they are not! How can you say that? First of all, they are very cute and adorable. And secondly, you have the same hair colour as their beak, how can you even hate them?”

“Well, for starts, they obviously copied me on that whole hair colour thing. And second, they are not cute, they are tiny deadly weapons!” He said gesticulating everywhere.

“Deadly?” You laughed at his words. “Give me an example, then.”

“Well… I hum… I got attacked by one of them one day.” He said and looked away, embarrassed.

“You what?”

“Don’t make say that again.” He covered his red face in and you couldn’t help but to chuckle at his reaction.

“What did you do for the duck to attack you?”

“That’s the thing, I didn’t do anything!” He said, obviously frustrated “It must have been like “Oh, there is Park Jimin, how about I just peck the soul out of him?”

You couldn’t control yourself anymore. You just started laughing out loud, not caring if anyone would think you were crazy or not. Some tears started to prick free from your eyes and your stomach began to ache. Jimin did, however, start to laugh too, much to your surprise.

You didn’t even know what you two might seem at the moment, but honestly you didn’t care. And neither did he.

“This is it” He announced pointing at the café.

There was a group of people sat outside in some chairs and tiny sofas speaking loudly. There was a metal table in the middle of them and an umbrella shielding them from the sun. The café had a relaxed felling to it with the wooden door and the big windows that decorated its walls.

“Guys, this is Y/N” He said and you smiled at them. You knew some of them, such as Jungkook, the green haired boy and Peyton, but the other faces were unfamiliar to you. She smiled at you and mentioned for you to seat between her and another girl that had pink hair, on the small sofa. Jimin, however, sat on one of the chairs, right in front of you.

“Can you believe her favourite animals are ducks?” He said and you scratched your arm in embarrassment.

“Wait. Did you tell her about “the duck incident”?” Jungkook asked in between laughs. The rest of them started laughing too, as if they were all remembering it. “You should have seen his face, he looked like he had just shit himself! And his scream! He looked like a little girl!”

“Yeah, yeah. Very funny.”Jimin said rolling his eyes. “You can laugh all you want, but it wasn’t you who was being pecked to death.” Jimin responded.

After a while they all got back to chatting. You were expecting to be uncomfortable, since you barely knew anyone besides Jimin, but they were so carefree and friendly to be around that you started to actually enjoy hanging out with them.

“Guys,” A guy interrupted, getting up from his spot. He waved all around to try and catch everybody’s attention while taking his wallet from his back pocket. “I’m going to buy a pack of cigarettes, anyone want one?”

Everyone shook their heads no except for Jimin who was looking at you with a blank expression. His face was unreadable, and you thought that he was probably thinking about what you had said to him the last time he smoked around you.

What about you Jimin, want one?“

“No, thanks Jin. I’m good” He said and smiled, still not tearing his eyes away from yours.

Everybody’s face had the same expression on it. Shock. Like it was the first time he had ever declined a pack of cigarettes. The green haired boy, however, was smiling proudly at him.

“What?” Jimin asked, confused, while looking at their reactions.

“Nothing. It’s just it’s the first time I have ever seen you saying no to a pack of cigarettes. I’m just… shocked, I guess.” Jungkook said, shaking his head.

“What made you change your mind so quickly?” Jin asked. He still hasn’t moved since Jimin said no to him, which had shocked and made him curious at the same time, as well as everyone else.

“Did you know that each cigarette takes away eleven minutes of your life ?” He says, quoting you. “And that’s eleven minutes less that I get to spend with the people I care about.”

He winked at you and you stared at the ground, blushing hard. However, nobody seemed to notice that as they were all looking at them with their eyes wide open. You really wanted to believe in his words, that he cared about you, but you couldn’t seem to fully do that, especially when Peyton was sitting next to you, and you knew he had some kind of feelings for her. Or so it seemed like.

“I’m proud of you man” Jungkook said while patting him on his back.

“Well if you put it that way…” Jin responded, sitting down “I guess there is no pack of cigarettes for me either”

You bitt your bottom lip trying to hold in a smile. You felt proud of him and of everyone else too.

“Hey, what do you say about we play some darts?” The pink haired girl said.

“Sounds good to me” Jungkook answered, getting up.

“Are you kidding me? I just sat down” Jin growled.

Everyone got up and walked inside. The interior of the cafe was the complete opposite that you were expecting. It was big, full of light and of colour as well. There was a counter filled with drinks, glasses and machines on the right side and the rest of the place was filled with little wooden tables and couches. On a little area there was only two sets of darts, which meant that some of you had to wait for their turn.

“Jeon Jungkook, come on then. I’m going to beat your ass” Jimin said while taking his jacket and handing it over to you.

“Ha ha, you are really funny, did you know that?” He said as they walked away in the direction of the first one.

“Y/N, do you mind if I play with her first?” Peyton asked.

“No, go ahead. I will sit for a while.” You smiled at her and sat on the sofa, next to the boy with the green hair.

“Yoongi, my man, I’m going to the bathroom so-”

“That’s some unnecessary information, don’t you think?” He laughed and joined you on the couch.

You two sat back watching the others play in silence until Yoongi spoke up.

“Y/N, do you like Jimin?” He suddenly asked, out of nowhere.

“I what?”

“I asked you if you liked Jimin.” He simply stated.

“Why are you asking me that?” You questioned him. If you didn’t know how to respond to that question to yourself how the heck were you going to answer that to him?

“I have seen the way he looks at you and you looked at him. And there is this whole cigarette thing that left us all a bit taken a back. The others might not have noticed but I saw him looking at you the whole time we were together outside” He ruffled his green hair, still focused on the people who were playing.

“I… I don’t know.” You said. “Maybe.” Normally you would feel very nervous when you were talking about this to someone but Yoongi was such a relaxed person that you got more relaxed yourself. “It doesn’t matter anyways. I know he likes Peyton”

“What do you mean?”

“On the other night, Peyton kissed his cheek at he stepped back, blushing.”

“Do you have a first love Y/N?” He asked.

“Yeah, why?”

“If that person came up to you and kissed your cheek wouldn’t that make you blush? However that wouldn’t make your feelings for Jimin go away, would it?” You played with the hem of your shirt as he talked. You were listening to every word carefully and absorbing each one.

“You are right.”

“Peyton was Jimin’s first love. He liked her a lot but she never really cared about him. But recently, she started noticing him more but he doesn’t reciprocate those feelings for her anymore.”

Oh.

“But, could you make me a favour?” He asked.

“Yeah, I think so.” You took a bit longer to process what he had just said. Was he saying the truth? Did Jimin not have feelings for Peyton? And more importantly, did you actually liked Jimin? It was a whole lot of new information to process.

“Be careful, please. With yourself and with him.” He said and you nodded your head.

“So, what did I miss?” Jin interrupted, sitting next to Yoongi.

“Nothing” He responded. “Surprisingly, Jimin is winning”

You blocked their voices out of your head and focused only on Jimin. He was laughing at something that Jungkook had done, his eyes all wrinkled and his teeth showing. His orange hair was pushed off his forehead with his sunglasses and his arm muscles were showing. He noticed you staring at him and smiled at you, followed by a wink and launch of one arrow.

“That´s not fare!” Jungkook whined while Jimin did his victory dance.

The door suddenly opened which made you cover your eyes with your hands from all the light that was getting in. A group of people came in and closed the door loudly and aggressively behind them. They had an angry expression on their faces, like they were ready to beat someone up.

“Where the hell is Park Jimin?!” One of them yelled.

Oh boy.

Stiles had had enough!

Seriously, he was done with selfish werewolves who didn’t care about fragile human hearts and liked to play games like who can scare the human the most. It was was unnecessary and just plain rude! He’d told them all time and time again to quit it and they refused, so now he was going to plan B.

Deaton was surprisingly helpful for once, smiling his enigmatic smile–or was that a touch of mischievousness he saw?–and handing over a book of spells, pointing out a few that were used to hiding one’s scent or heartbeat. It was brilliant, foolproof. Stiles couldn’t wait.

Erica, Isaac, and Boyd were his first victims. The puppies were especially vocal on their enjoyment of teasing the pack human and scaring him was a fan favorite. So he grinned to himself, sneaking closer while wearing the charm around his neck that he’d fashioned to hide any sounds he made and his scent.

“Hey, guys!” He greeted once he was close enough, causing them all to jerk away from each other. Erica was on the offense, claws popped and eyes flashing, Boyd was on defense, bowed up like an angry cat prepared to strike, and Isaac had actually stumbled and fell in surprise. Stiles grinned unrepentantly. Excellent.

It was never-ending now. No one ever did figure out how he was doing it, but now he was serving a nice helping of karma to the wolves who’d terrorized him for months. To be honest, he did feel a little bad after startling Derek so bad that he dropped his plate of food and went full wolf (it had taken him over an hour to convince the wolf to climb out from under the table and shift back; he was still getting the angry brows for that one), so he’d laid off the Alpha after then, but the puppies were fair game. He’d asked them for months to stop scaring him and they’d actively tried to catch him doing something that he’d mess up after being scared, so he had no mercy.

Frustratingly though, the only one who he hasn’t manage to scare yet was Peter.

He crept closer to where Peter was reclining on the couch on the loft, reading a paperback.

“Stiles.”

“Dammit!”

Stiles stomped over to the man, huffing angrily. “How are you doing that?” He demanded.

Peter smirked up at him, eyes alight with humor, as he closed the book and stood. “A master never reveals his secrets,” he teased.

“It’s magician, you simpleton.”

Peter laughed. “You tell me what spell you’re using to hide from everyone and I’ll tell you how I know when you’re creeping.”

Stiles scowled. “One day,” he threatened menacingly before leaving the loft.

Stiles tried again on training day when they’d all been in the woods, doubling back after telling everyone goodbye and creeping around after donning his necklace charm. Peter was still practicing with Boyd. Perfect. He crept closer, trying to keep from snickering.

“Stiles.”

Stiles yelped, tripping over a tree root and stumbling into the clearing. Boyd blinked, surprised, but not the scare factor he was looking for.

“Fuck you,” Stiles grumbled, sitting up and brushing the leaves and dirt off of him.

Peter grinned victoriously. Stiles glared. Boyd looked like he’d finally figured something out and seconds away from laughing.

Stiles’ next attempt was on pack night. Peter was talking with Scott about something and he just knew this time was going to work. He snuck closer, oh so slowly.

“Stiles,” Peter stated.

“God-fucking-dammit! How are you doing that?!” Stiles demanded, coming into the kitchen.

Scott snorted, trying to hide his laughter, and Stiles whirled onto him. “Why are you laughing?”

“I can’t believe that worked,” Scott muffled out, looking over at Peter. “You are truly dedicated to being evil.”

“What? What did he do? Do you know how he does it? Tell me!” Stiles yelled.

“Dude, Peter just says your name randomly when you’re not here. You always react if you’re around so you reveal yourself.”

Peter pouted. “I thought the agreement was no one would tell him that.”

Scott shrugged. “Pinky promise in second grade says I can’t hide things from him.”

Peter rolled his eyes while Stiles stared at him in disbelief.

“Are you serious? You’ve never known I was there? You just sit around and say my name randomly to see if I pop up?”

“You’re kind of like Beetlejuice or Bloody Mary. I never have to say it more than three times,” Peter added.

Stiles laughed delightedly. “Oh my god, you dork. You absolute goofball. Everyone must think you’re crazy.”

“Derek had already explained his craziness,” Scott said, shrugging. “Not that we didn’t already know he was crazy.”

“Excuse you, I’m still present,” Peter drawled.

“Drama King,” Stiles teased. “Man, this is great. You’re so extra, dude. You just can’t accept that someone might’ve got the jump on you.”

“I think that’s enough sharing for now.” Peter turned to leave the room.

“No! Wait! I’m not done making fun of you yet!” Stiles hurried after him.

“Goodbye, Stiles,” Peter waved him off.

“No way, dramawolf! This is gold!”

“Not listening!”

“Oh my god, are you five? Come back here! I’m not done mocking you yet! Peter!” 

Mark Soulmate AU

Soulmate AU where a single sentence that your soulmate has said that day appears on your arm

  • to make this easier on me you go to school with mark and hyuck
  • i decided to spare mark of an angsty scenario lmao
  • lets start boyos
  • so youre actually good friends with hyuck
  • you think youre best friends but he makes fun of you so much you question your relationship sometimes
  • you feel bad for his soulmate
  • because hyuck says some really, really stupid things
  • “y/n i cant find my phon- oh nvm its in my hand lol”
  • “note to self: the smoke alarm should not be used as a timer when cooking”
  • “if you dont have “me” in your life, everything is just “aweso”
  • but i guess that makes him unique and i guess somewhat easier to find
  • you think your soulmate is very studious
  • “no no the answer is 234 i swear it is”
  • “i will actually give you my brownies if thats helium and not hydrogen”
  • nerd
  • but sometimes he says the sweetest things
  • “ahh im sorry but im not giving up on my soulmate yet”
  • “im sorry but i cant go on a date with you, my soulmate is still out there waiting”
  • and it makes your heart speed up when you see quotes like these on your arm
  • but this also lets you know he must be popular with the ladiesss ;)
  • anyways
  • you thought this day was going to be just like the rest but fate had a different plan
  • “y/n im going to my other friend mark’s after school, wanna come?”
  • “hard pass but thanks for the offer”
  • “pfft youre no fun”
  • “what ever you say fart face”
  • its unusual that hyuck doesnt walk home with you
  • but its w/e
  • lets jump to where hyuck and mark are
  • “mark why dont you date?”
  • “why date when you know you have someone out there for you?”
  • “youre so whipped for them and you havent even met them yet”
  • “yeah i guess i am whipped they say some cute things sometimes”
  • “i guess this is not one of those times”
  • mark looked down at his arm and noticed what hyuck was laughing at
  • ‘what ever you say fart face’
  • cue a blushing mark
  • hyuck is over to the side having the time of his life
  • but then hyuck realizes
  • “i knOW WHO SAID THAT”
  • back 2 u now
  • its late
  • like youre asleep late
  • but then your phone goes off turns out its hyuck calling you
  • “bith i was sleeping and im not going to mark’s its too late now”
  • “no no just tell me the words (mark shut up no get off of me im not giving you the phone) on your arm”
  • “um hold on i havent checked. it says..”
  • ‘ok fine my hair looked like noodles a few months ago but its fine now!’
  • cue another blushing mark and a laughing hyuck
  • “oh..oh my god thats too good…ok thanks y/n bye”
  • “wait hyuck why!”
  • whoops too late he hung up
  • “so mark, did you say that today?”
  • “…i want to say no but yes i did”
  • “mark you know what this means?”
  • “yeah i do dont touch anything while im gone ill know”
  • just when you were about to fall asleep, you hear a banging at your door
  • “jesus who is it??? its like 2 am”
  • lo and behold its mark lee, out of breathe because he was running 2 u
  • “jus…just give me a minute to catch my breathe”
  • “umm ok do you want to come in?”
  • “no..no just give me a minute”
  • thats when you caught a glimpse of his arm and the words you had previously told hyuck that day
  • “oh my god were soulmates”
  • once he (finally) caught his breathe he kissed your forehead and hugged you
  • this hug made you feel safe and at home
  • lowkey he smelled like strawberries
  • “so did you really have noodle hair?”
  • “shhHHhh dont ruin the moment”
  • “but yes i did”
  • ok im done
  • thanks for reading
  • its much appreciated
  • byebye
Certain as the Sun: VII

Here is the next part to Certain as the Sun. ***WARNING: EXTREME EXPLICIT CONTENT***  I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as it killed my heart to write it. (That’s all the spoilers I’ll give. Please prepare yourselves). Sorry it’s also super long.

{..}..{..}..{..}..{..}..{..}..{..}

I could think up about a million different possibilities as for why the hell Tamlin had sent for me to be brought to the Spring Court and none of them involved him letting Feyre go so that she could return home with me.

When I had first received the note from none other than the High Lord of the Spring Court himself, Amren had advised me to ignore it.

“It’s a trap,” she’d said, eyes blaring. “What good reason would he have to send for you?” When I’d addressed the rest of the Inner Circle as well, they’d had similar thoughts. There was one thing we all agreed upon, and that was that Tamlin had not invited me to his home for a nice brunch and some polite conversation.

When I’d tried to reach out to Feyre again I had been met with that dark, infinite void. She had not contacted him at all since she’d returned once again to the Spring Court. And although I was certain she must possess some perfectly good explanation unbeknownst to myself, it still struck some sort of chord that she had severed herself from me so thoroughly.

Nevertheless, I had agreed to meet with Tamlin. Morrigan and Amren were both waiting just on the outskirts of the Spring Court should I need their assistance. I’d ordered Azriel to take to the skies and keep watch from there, Cassian flanking my side. Normally, their roles were reversed, but in great thanks to that bastard King of Hybern, we still had not found any cure for Cassian’s ruined wings.

He had not yet come to terms with it, and over these past months, I could tell that there was something that was a bit off about my fellow Illyrian warrior. I could not begin to imagine the pain that came with being without your wings—for Illyrians we’d sooner lose our lives than the one thing that kept us from being fully tethered to the ground. Every day that Cassian chose to continue was another that my respect for him grew.

Even if that did mean getting rip-roaring drunk with him more than usual.

“Well, Tamlin’s certainly got a flair for the extravagant,” Cassian mused upon coming face to face with a ridiculously gaudy table sat decoratively in a corner. It seemed to have no use whatsoever besides showcasing Tamlin’s less than desirable personality traits.

No sooner did the words come from Cassian’s lips did a servant come to take us to wherever Tamlin was hiding out. He was a small, young Fae. Exceedingly pointed ears were a light shade of green at the tips, his eyes wide at the sight of the two warriors before him.

The boy swallowed before speaking. “Master Tamlin has ordered me to fetch you,” he said, fighting to stop his voice from quivering so much. “Please follow me.”

He promptly spun on his heels and walked out of the room, not bothering to ensure we were following him.

As we were led through the utter maze that was the Spring Court dwelling, I was shocked at how many memories were associated with this place that had once been like a home but was now nothing more than a living hell.

Finally, the boy led us to a set of dusty rose-colored double doors. His timid fingers lightly rapped on the door, followed by a, “Come in.”

As one we all filed inside. The room was big and spacious, a single table set with four chairs instead of just three did not escape my notice. This particular room had been peculiarly made with mirrors on three of the four walls, as well as the ceiling, giving it the illusion that you were standing in a pool of Starlight due to the sun that refracted off of them.

And standing at the lone window in the room was none other than the High Bastard himself.

Tamlin turned upon hearing our arrival, a welcoming smile adorning his lips. “Rhysand. Cassian,” he greeted. As he made his way over to us, I noted that his choice in clothing was just as flamboyant as his furniture. He wore a finely tailored red tunic with bright silver trimmings, grey pants, and black boots. His hair graced past his shoulders, and sitting atop his head was the infamous Spring Court crown. It looked decidedly uncomfortable.

“I trust you made it here without any trouble,” he continued.

“Your trust is accurately placed,” Cassian said with more than a hint of malice.

Tamlin just nodded, keeping that pleasant smile on his face. “Well, please sit. We’ve much to discuss.”

Neither Cassian nor I moved.

“I don’t have time for whatever mind tricks you’re trying to pull, Tamlin. Perhaps you’ve forgotten that that is one area—of many— that my performance supersedes yours,” I replied coolly.

That smile drooped ever slightly.

“I don’t see your Lady floating about,” I remarked. “Keeping her locked away for fear I may meddle with her mind again, are we?”

“Funny you should mention her, actually,” Tamlin’s eyes glittered with something that had my senses on high alert. “Feyre,” he called, “would you please join us?”

A moment later I heard the doors that we’d entered just a few moments ago open and then shut once more. I forced myself to breathe, not to react, to calm myself as Feyre came into view.

She was wearing a dress similar in fashion to what Tamlin was wearing, a pretty diadem sat upon her head. Feyre did not glance our way as she rushed to Tamlin, her lips meeting his as soon as he was within arm’s length.

Tamlin scooped her into his arms, Feyre leaning into his touch as his hand moved further south than should be permitted in front of an audience.

Cassian was taut as a bow, his hands clenching and unclenching were they were hidden behind his back. It took all my strength not to turn Tamlin’s mind to putty then and there, and I could tell similar thoughts were indeed running through Cassian’s mind as well as we were forced to watch helplessly as our High Lady shoved her tongue down another man’s throat.

“How are you today, my love?” He asked. She smiled broadly, one she had only ever graced me with when she was incandescently happy.

“I’m well, thank you,” she replied, beaming at him. “I got some more paintings done today.”

“Did you?”

She nodded, biting down on her lower lip, eyes sparkling. “I was feeling oddly inspired this morning…perhaps due to—”

“Either we get on with whatever business, or the two of you get a room and we leave,” Cassian interrupted. As much as I wished I could say that I would have been able to stand there for a few moments more and let them go about their business, it was killing me to see her this way.

When Feyre had visited, she’d told me she had to do things to keep up appearances. Things that she was not proud of. She hadn’t specified at the time, but there was no need. I knew exactly the kind of things she probably had to do to keep up the facade that she was hopelessly in love with Tamlin.

And yet, the wrath deafening my ears came as a surprise.

Indeed, it was one thing to be told, and another entirely to experience.

“Feyre, you remember Rhysand, I’m sure. And the other is Cassian. His…advisor.”

I couldn’t help the low chuckle that came as a result of his words. “You think you will anger me by disrespecting not only my title but a member of my court as well. It will take much more than a few insults, princeling, for me to reveal my true self.” His brows rose. “And I assure you, your claws would not like to become acquainted with my talons.”

He was quiet for a moment, eyes calculating.

Finally, he spoke. “You know what? You’re right. So very right, Rhysand. How foolish of me to think I could rile you with belittling you insignificant and, frankly, foolish court of savages anyway?” My teeth set. “It would take something much more…personal, I think.”

It took less than a heartbeat for Cassian to have his swords drawn, me reaching out to strangle Tamlin’s mind as the room was flooded with ten guards. They all immediately came at us, and I was more than prepared to fight our way out of this cursed kingdom with Tamlin tisked.

“Spill a drop of their blood, and your beloved mate loses her head.” It took me a moment to realize what he was saying, an infinitely longer moment for it to process. For when I looked at where Feyre had once been standing like another pretty piece of Tamlin’s furniture, she was now being held by three guards.

I forced my face into a mask of calm. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, you crazy bastard.”

His brows rose in mock surprise. “Oh really? You’ve no clue that Feyre is, indeed, your mate? That she’s been pretending this entire time to love me when really, she had staged everything just to infiltrate the Spring Court. A spy within my own walls, hiding in plain sight.” He paused, as if waiting for me to answer some unspoken question.

“Well then, if you have no feelings whatsoever for our lovely Feyre, here. I suppose you’ll have no problem watching this.” I watched as he snapped his fingers and a table decorated with over a dozen lethal weapons, a whip, and strangely, a bed appeared.

“As you know, the punishment for such treason is death.” He stalked towards Feyre, whose eyes had gone devoid of all emotion. As if she’d shut herself out of her own body. With one finger, he lifted her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “I’m sorry for this, Feyre. I really am.” A regretful shake of the head and then, “Get on with it, boys.”

Immediately, Tamlin’s guards began to strip Feyre, yanking at her dress, tearing at the pins and beads in her hair until she was entirely naked before us. Once finished, Tamlin handed a long, black whip to the nearest guard. Something winked at the end of the whip—glass, I realized with unabashed horror.

“You’re going to whip her to death?” I asked, somehow still managing to keep my voice utterly bored.

Tamlin shrugged. “We’ll see how well she holds out.” He nodded at the guard, and I was sure my heart cleaved itself in two as Feyre took in a deep, shuddering breath, preparing herself for the pain that was sure to come.

The guard’s arm reared back, time seeming to slow as his arm came down.

The resounding crack of leather on skin was one that would haunt me for many centuries to come.

Feyre only released a strangled cry, biting the inside of her cheek to keep from calling out. And that was how it went as the guard whipped her again, and again, and again. I lost count sometime after fifty.

I knew that Feyre’s back had stopped healing itself when she finally released a cry so full of agony, it was all I could do to stop from ripping that whip from the guard’s hands and using it myself.

Tamlin allowed the guard to bring down that leather ten more times before he finally said, “Enough. Get her up.”

They heaved her up, Tamlin slowly circling around her like a lion before its prey. When he was once again facing her he murmured, “Get on the bed.”

Feyre looked at him, her eyes burning like liquid amber. But she did not respond, and she did not move. Only stared at him with a look that promised death in the future.

“Get on the bed, Feyre, or I will instruct my guards to seize your mate’s cousin and bring her back here.”

“I don’t know who you’re talking about.”

“Pretty little thing isn’t she? Bright red lips, beautiful honeyed hair. The only family Rhysand has left if I recall correctly. It’d be a shame for dear Rhys to be the only left of his name, wouldn’t it?”

And then Feyre looked beyond Tamlin, her eyes locking with mine. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” they seemed to say.

“I’m going to kill you.” My voice was quiet, but it was filled with a vow I had every intention to keep.

Tamlin didn’t turn to me as he said. “I don’t believe you’ll have the chance.” He inclined his head toward the waiting bed. “Off you go, Feyre.”

She hesitated for a moment, gaze still locked with mine before she obeyed.

“Now, Rhys, since she is your mate I figured I’d offer. Would you like to have a go? Feyre has…well, not really two choices but two possibilities,” he finally turned to meet my gaze. “Either you join her in that bed and fuck her…or I will, gladly, as you watch. You’ve thirty seconds to decide.”

“Rhys.” I looked over at Feyre to see her shaking her head, her eyes swimming not with tears, but with a sort of determination that only came with acceptance. “Don’t do it. Do not agree to this.”

“Feyre—”

“I’ll be fine,” she promised.

“Feyre—” Cassian tried.

“I will. Be. Fine,” she said, sternly this time.

And I wanted to believe her, I really did.

I wanted to believe that this wouldn’t be the thing that broke her, being raped by the man who had once claimed to love her. I knew he wouldn’t be gentle with her, even after being whipped. The man who had once been thought to be her savior, lover, friend.

But Tamlin was none of those things.

And I couldn’t, not for the life of me, believe that she would still be Feyre after this.

“Alright,” Tamlin sighed, “I guess I’m—”

“I’ll do it.”

“Rhys—”

“Now, now, Feyre. Let him finish.”

Cassian turned to me, anguish in his eyes. “Rhysand, you don’t—”

“I’ll do it,” I repeated, ignoring him. “I’ll sleep with her.”

“Well then,” Tamlin grinned, “I don’t believe you need me to instruct you on how to go about your business.” He gestured towards Feyre, towards the bed, my damnation.

I watched in horror as Feyre fought back tears at my approach, and all I could pray for was that she’d one day forgive me for this, for this sin I was about to commit.

She slid to the side as I rid myself of my clothing, by back to Tamlin’s gathered audience. Her eyes never left mine as I finally joined her on that bed.

“It’s alright,” I whispered my lips at her ear. “It’s just me. It’s just me.”

She couldn’t respond, she was shaking so hard. I’d never seen her shaking so violently. Feyre lifted my chin with her finger, her head shaking.

“Don’t stop looking at me,” she begged. “Don’t leave me. Please.”

“I won’t,” I promised. “I won’t.”

Slowly, Tamlin be damned, I made sure to honor her body, despite all of the new scars, worshipping all of her newly inflicted wounds. I wanted Feyre to know it was me, that despite this terrible act we were being forced into, it did not mean that I loved her any less.

When I finally connected our bodies, she let out a slight gasp, her eyes, now swimming with tears, still never leaving mine as I moved, my body cocooning hers, careful of her wounds.

“I’m here,” I whispered down the bond, “I’m here. I won’t leave you. I love you.”

But all I was met with was an infinite void.

Persephone {pt.5 (FINAL)}

Type: Miniseries Continuation; 7th Sense | One | Two | Three | Four | Five (FINAL) |
Genre: Drama, Fantasy, Fluff, Suggestive (NO SMUT), Demon!AU, Witch!AU
Member: Joshua/Jisoo
Word count: 3,701
A/N: Thank you all for the love this series has received and with bearing the long wait! :)
© 


After so many years you were finally home.

Your yearning wish was finally granted, but not in the way you had in mind.

Your head turns over to the door when footsteps shuffle down the hallway. It wasn’t just one pair of steps, but multiple followed by voices. You grip the edge of the porcelain tub as the door bursts open.

You expected your family to run to you and spoil you with affection, but they only blankly stare into the bathroom.

“She’s here,” your little brother announced.

Your parents and older twin sisters frantically look all over the room, grief upon their faces. The space between your brows twitch. Why were they acting like they couldn’t see you?

“What’s wrong with them, Leon?” You uttered, staring at them strangely.

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Sleep tight

Summary:  Negan pays a visit to his favorite wife late at night.

Author:  Multireality

Pairing(s): Negan x reader

Word Count: 1190

Warnings: Smut, slight fluff, Negan’s potty mouth, unprotected sex

Author’s Notes: This is my first one-shot so please go easy on me. Send any requests for future imagines and one shots. I write for most fandoms so just message me if you have any questions on what fandoms I write for.

I heard him before I saw him. The tell-tale sound of a zipper echoed in the quiet room, the thud of leather hitting the floor seemed louder in the quiet of the night. It must have been the early hours of the morning, as the sun had long since been forgotten and I turned in for sleep hours ago.

My eyes were open yet I lay stock still, lying in wait for him to make the first move. “Y/N” he whispered, his voice slowly moving towards me. “Negan it’s late”, his soft chuckle filled my ears like music, I loved when he was in this mood – playful and carefree. “I missed my favorite wife”, the sound of his pants hitting the floor signified that he was slowly stripping off his clothes.

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For The Love Of Harry, Chapter Three

The weather was finally beginning to become more bearable now that spring had arrived in London, or at least it wasn’t as nippily anymore most days. The lawns were speckled with browns and greens, but still crunched underneath your feet as the grass struggled to spring anew once again. Tulip leaves were prematurely attempting to poke their tips through soil, and the very teensiest bit of small green buds were appearing on trees. People were starting to do the domestic tasks of spring…opening windows while cleaning the must and dust of winter from the stagnant air of their homes, preparing the ground for gardening, and maintaining lawn care equipment so it was ready when needed.

You personally enjoyed that your walk between stations, work, home, and anywhere else you fancied on a pretty day, was a beautifully warm and lovely walk, rather than arctic chills reaching up your skirt. You also liked that you could once again be outside more, participating in activities you enjoyed, like going for runs, grilling food without snow flaking your hair, and playing a spot of tennis with a friend from work who also enjoyed the sport.

The past few weeks had been amazing! You and Harry were spending much more time together. You weren’t completely sure how to label what it was you had going with him, but you never were much for labels anyway. All you knew was that you were enjoying your time with him, and he was choosing to spend time with you. You. Not the millions of girls and women around the world that fell at his feet in worship. Not the models and actresses and other celebrities who were associated with him in one respect or another. You. He wanted to spend his free time with you, and that made you feel…special.

You heard the bell of your front door as you finished getting ready for his visit. You looked out the upstairs window and saw him standing at the door, always a picture of handsomeness.

“Hey!” you hollered down at him from the window with a smile.

“Hello, love!” he smiled up at you.

“It’s unlocked. Come on in!” you yelled as he winked at you and opened the door, you hearing him close the door behind him.

“Am I too early?” he hollered up the stairs to you.

“Not at all!” you replied back, as you walked out of your bedroom to the top of the stairs. You looked down the stairs at him, and it hit you suddenly that you were exploring…something…with Harry. You couldn’t help but smile when he looked at you. His whole face smiled when he was happy.

“I brought some drinks, and some music,” he said gleefully.

“And I have the food, and the grill is already hot,” you replied as you walked to where he was still standing. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“Thank you for asking,” he smiled, his hand eagerly finding your waist and pulling you closely to him, lightly kissing your lips. “I’ve missed you.”

You giggled at how adorable he was. “You just saw me yesterday.”

“Always miss you when you aren’t around me,” he grinned shyly, kissing you lightly again, then another to your temple as he hugged you.

“I miss you, too,” you spoke against his cheek. “How about we get the food going then see what music you brought?”

“Sounds like a plan,” he smiled.

You grabbed everything needed and walked to the back patio. 

“Have you prepared it all already? The seasonings and such?” Harry asked you.

“Um, no actually, why? Are you allergic to something?” you asked curiously.

“Not at all,” he said. “I would…just, sort of, like to cook for you, is all. I rather enjoy cooking, and you’ve done it for me so many times now, it’s my turn.”

“I really don’t mind…” you started to say, but he interrupted.

“Sit!” he ordered, followed by a laugh and smile. “Not asking now. Want to cook for you. I’m a master griller,” he bragged about his cooking.

“Better than being a master-bater…” you quipped with raised brows as you finished the final drink of the water bottle you had been nursing throughout the morning and grinned mischievously. He shot you a look but smirked as he looked over the food you had for lunch. 

“Actually brought my favorite seasonings with me if…” he stopped at you giggling at him, “don’t laugh at me!” He chuckled at you giggling. “Just…I want to impress you with my cooking skills now, and I’m a bit particular sometimes.”

You smiled at him and walked to him, wrapping your arms around his waist and kissing his cheek. “I cannot wait to taste the food you make, handsome,” you said honestly, bringing a toothy smile to his face, bookended by dimples that made you weak in the knees.

“Good,” he finished, “Now, let me just get this going, then I would really like to smooch on you for a bit.”

You let him have his way with the food, not wanting to step on his creations or techniques, and happy to do so. It had been ages since you remembered someone cooking for you, besides a local restaurant, or Kari opening a tin of spaghetti hoops and warming them through. You watched as he meticulously seasoned each piece of meat, making sure every one was covered perfectly to his satisfaction, then placing each where he wanted them over the fire, so that they cooked evenly and wouldn’t set the grill ablaze should the juices drip on a particularly aggressive coal. As he lowered the lid of the grill, pleased with the progress, he turned to you, wiping his hand on the towel, flinging it over his shoulder, and smiling slightly.

“You know, Grill Master Harry is pretty damn sexy,” you flirted, taking a chug from the cold drink Harry had offered as his initial contribution to the meal.

He smirked and walked toward where you were sitting on the double lounger of the patio. “Is he now?”

“He is, yes,” you confirmed. “Could be the ‘Kiss the Cock’ apron he’s wearing”.

Harry laughed out loud. “It says ‘Kiss the Cook’!”

“You interpret it your way, I’ll interpret it mine,” you smooshed your lips in together then popped them out quickly into a bit of a pouty lip as your tongue remoisturized them lightly. Harry realized quickly your intentional ‘error’ and smirked again, sitting next to you on the lounger.

“And are you flirting with the cook to get him to act upon your obvious advances?” he leaned closely to you, looking at your lips then again at your eyes.

“Is it working?” you questioned, raising your brows with a smirk of your own.

He smiled then pressed his lips against yours, taking advantage of your lips parting to allow his tongue to taste you. He moaned lightly as he leaned more firmly against you and felt your breasts bearing against his chest. As he pulled away from your kiss reluctantly, he looked at your lips like they were one of the wonders of the world, then into your eyes once again.

“Does that answer your question?” he asked, allowing his lips to graze lightly over your chin.

He heard your voice catch slightly as you cleared your throat and squeaked a soft, “Fuck, yeah”.

The two of you continued flirting as Harry finished the food. You set the round glass patio table for the meal and nearly gasped at how wonderful the food he had prepared looked and smelled. As he sat the small platter in the center of the table, you placed a lovely bowl of an assorted greens salad you prepared ahead next to it, which is interlaced with almond slices, fresh berries, and a lovely poppy seed dressing you wanted to try out.

“Bon appétit, love,” Harry smiled as he raised his drink to you, clinking it gently to your own. You returned his smile as you both began enjoying the meal.

“Mmm, that’s delicious, Harry!” you raved. “So tender!”

Smiling proudly. “Thank you! Thank you very much! I do take great pride in my cooking abilities,” he beamed.

“As you should,” you nodded.

“So, while we partake of this mutually agreed upon amazing meal,” he giggled, “I would like to talk to you about something.”

“Oh, okay,” you said, wiping your mouth with your napkin and taking a drink. “What’s up?”

“I have had a change in my schedule,” he said, with a slight frown. “I have to leave tomorrow morning for some work in New York, and while I’m in America, I’ll be flying to LA for a bit of work, as well.”

“Oh,” you replied, your own mouth pouting. “Work calls, eh?”

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“How long will you be gone?” you asked quietly.

“I’m not really sure,” he answered, placing his fork next to his plate. “Could be awhile.”

Not wanting him to feel bad that he must work, you grinned and nodded. “Well, I’ll make sure to have a home-cooked meal waiting for you when you get back eventually.”

“Actually,” he said, watching you, “I was wondering if you might be able to come join me at some point while I’m there. Visit me.”

“Oh.”

You know there is a lot that goes along with being around Harry, and the two of you had still yet to define really what you were. A couple? Dating? Just two people enjoying time together? So far the two of you had kept your time together private, only in the security of your own property or his, and rarely drove anywhere together. To this point, you were pretty confident that you had not been discovered.

“I know we’ve discussed before, and agreed, to keep our relationship as private as possible for now,” he said, as if reading your thoughts. “I still think that’s for the best, don’t you?”

“Yes, of course,” you agreed. “I know how difficult it is for you, Harry, and I completely understand.”

“Thank you,” he said, squeezing your hand. “I just never want you to feel like I’m…not wanting to be seen in public with you, or that I’m ashamed of you or our relationship. That could never be further from the truth.”

“I know,” you assured him.

“But, all that being said,” he started again, “I don’t want to go weeks, possibly months, without seeing you beyond the screen of a video chat, either.”

“So, tell me the answer,” you grinned.

“If you can arrange it with your work,” he explained, “I would like to find a good time for you to travel there. I’ll take care of your arrangements. And I’ll set it all up so that hopefully nobody will find out…about it…that sounds bad, doesn’t it….”

“Don’t worry about it, Harry,” you answered. “I know what you mean. I’m not offended, I understand how it works.”

“So, do you think you could? With work? And…do you want to?” he asked, unsure how to read you at the moment.

“What? Yeah, of course I want to. I can talk to TJ and see how much time I can get away,” you smiled. “If he complains too hard, I’ll offer to work from there and submit things to his email or something. You’ll be pretty busy anyway, right?”

“Well, yeah,” he replied. “But I’m not inviting you there to sit in a corner and just watch me work all the time, or for you to stay busy working. I want you there because…” he grinned lovingly, squeezing your hand. “Because I hate being away from you.”

You smiled back at him and felt his other hand envelope yours inside of his.

“I want you where I am, for as much as I can have you there,” he told you.

“I’m sure I can get some time,” you answered, kissing him sweetly. “I’ll let you know how long after I talk to TJ tomorrow. I’ve never taken a day of vacation since starting this job, so I’m due, I think.”

“Makes me very happy,” he said, kissing you again. “I’ll set it all up as soon as you know. Thank you for wanting to come.”

“Are you kidding?” you asked. “Give up a chance to see you work?”

“I don’t know how much you will be able to be around me outside of the flat, love,” he said regrettably. “Everything will have to be done very secretively so that we aren’t exposed. Don’t want you to have to deal with that any sooner than it will undoubtedly happen. Can’t risk being papped together yet, or fans catching us out together.”

You sighed and nodded your head with a reassuring grin. “It’s okay. Just getting to see you, spend time with you, not wait possibly months to see you again, will all be worth it.”

He leaned to you and kissed you gently, then again more deeply, holding your face in his hands. Pulling back briefly, running his thumb over your lips, he kissed you tenderly once more. “Now, let’s finish this food so I can have my way with you before I have to leave,” he giggled, kissing your cheek.

*

Harry’s flight had been typical and he soon found himself in his flat in New York. It was new for him, recently purchased under another name to protect his privacy, but served its purpose while he worked off and on in the city. As soon as he landed, his first thought was to check and see what you had managed with your supervisor.

“So, did it work out?” Harry asked quickly before you could even say hello.

You giggled, “Yes.”

“Excellent!” he exclaimed. “How long?”

“He said I could have two weeks…or three with an exclusive from you for the magazine,” you said quickly, trying to get it all out in one breath as you squinted your eyes against the blow of Harry hearing the words. You heard him sigh loudly. “Harry, don’t feel pressured. Really, it’s okay. Two weeks is better than nothing at all.”

“No, love,” he responded quickly. “No, it’s fine. It’s you anyway, right? They’ll let you have the exclusive?”

“Yes, but don’t do it if you aren’t comfortable with it, it’s fine,” you tried to assure him. “I told him that wasn’t fair, but he said for an extra week, that’s what it would cost.”

“It’ll work, no worries. For an extra week with you here, we’ll make it work,” he grinned to himself.

They looked at his schedule and decided the best time for the three weeks was at the end of his time there. A brief few days at the end of his New York work, then another week and a half in LA, followed by some alone time for them somewhere before returning to London. They would have to be very careful to keep their secret, but they were both happy for the challenge.

After a few weeks passed, you bubbled with happiness as you sat on the plane, waiting impatiently for its landing in New York. You had never been to New York, so you were looking forward to enjoying it a bit while there. You knew you wouldn’t be able to enjoy the city with Harry, but it would help time pass during the hours he was working.

As you made your way through the airport with your bags, you spied a man near a line of cars with a sign that read your name. You walked to him with a smile, handing him your bags for the boot, and eagerly sat in the back seat of the private car. Your eyes were glued to everything passed, a new experience for you to see. As you gawked at the buildings that were too high to see comfortably from the car window, you felt the vibration of your phone and quickly looked to see Harry’s name and contact pic staring back at you.

“Hey!” you exclaimed excitedly.

“You’ve finally arrived?” he asked impatiently.

“I have!” you answered, your voice unsteady from the excitement you felt. “When will I get to see you?”

“Soon, babe,” he answered. “The driver will take you to the flat, and I have someone there to let you inside. Just wait there for me and I’ll be there as soon as possible, alright?”

“I can’t wait to see you,” you nearly gushed.

He chuckled, “I’m so ready to see you, too.”

The driver stopped outside the building which held Harry’s private flat. As you took your bags from the driver and walked through the front doors, a man walked up to you and smiled.

“Hello, miss,” the large, bumpy man greeted you. “I was shown your photo and know you are a private guest of one of our tenants. He asked me to escort you in. Let me carry your bags and I’ll take you there now.”

“Oh, thank you!” you said, surprised and unsure, but trusting anyway after reading his name badge. You followed the man, who you now believed to be with building security, into an elevator which took you to the floor of Harry’s flat. He walked you to the door and opened it for you with a key Harry had given to him prior. He sat your bags in the entry of the apartment, then handed you the door key. “Thank you!”

“You’re very welcome, miss,” he replied with a smile. “Enjoy your time in New York!”

“I will!” you smiled, closing the door as he left.

You weren’t sure how long you stood in that spot, feeling a bit out of place, but looking at every detail as it jumped out at you. Photos sitting atop a hallway table of Harry with his family and friends. Iron hooks next to the door for jackets and coats. A large potted plant in the corner that stood as tall as you. You slowly began to walk down the entry hall, peaking into the open doors of the rooms you passed, seeing what appeared to be a small ½ bath next to a guest bedroom. You passed a beautiful kitchen and dining area before coming to a halt in the living room. You looked to your right where bright light was filtering in through what had to be the largest apartment windows you had ever seen in your life. Your first thought as you looked out at the city below was that you were happy you weren’t the person responsible for cleaning those windows. They were huge, reaching to the high ceiling above, and looked out over many other buildings and busy roads. You sat the key on the table next to you and simply glanced around the room, taking in everything you saw one bit at a time. You had been to Harry’s home in London, so it wasn’t like you had never seen extravagance or wealth before, but it had been the first and only experience for you until this point, so it still stopped you in your tracks when you witnessed it. Your little house back in London didn’t compare to this.

The flat is completely quiet, except for the humming of an appliance and the sound of a ticking clock somewhere, yet to be found. It smelled fragrantly of some sort of fruit and vanilla, which you found to be a collection of candles Harry had apparently lit earlier and blown out before leaving. You walked through the apartment, hoping you weren’t overstepping by looking around, but you knew Harry wouldn’t mind. You walked down another hallway that lead to two more bedrooms. The one at the beginning of the hall was a 2nd guest bedroom, slightly larger than the first, again with its own small bath. You walked further down the hall to the end, where you were met with Harry’s master bedroom. It was as big, if not bigger, than the other two rooms put together. 

As you walked into the room, your eyes looked around in a strange bit of awe. It was all very Harry. Large works of art on two of the walls kept your stare steady for a long moment. In one corner was a guitar on a stand, with a keyboard and stool next to it. Next to that corner was the doorway to a large walk-in closet, that you knew probably harbored a nice amount of clothing and shoes…boots, no doubt…that Harry kept there for less to deal with while traveling. On the opposite side of the room there was one of the largest beds you had ever seen, but still a bit smaller than the one he had in his London home, you thought. You walked to it and lifted one of the pillows to your face, breathing in, and smiling as you smelled Harry on them. Not the smell of his hair products, or soap, or even his cologne. But the smell you had grown to love so much, that was simply the smell of Harry. You couldn’t describe it, nor did you need to. It was one of the most lovely, comfortable scents you had ever known.

Burying your face into the pillow and breathing in again, you heard the sound of keys in the front door, then heard it open and close. You smiled so big your cheeks instantly ached, as you ran out of the bedroom, down the hallway, and looked through the vast room toward the front entry, seeing a smiling Harry chuckle then quickly jog toward you. You approachd him, realizing you were still clutching the bed pillow in your arms, and tossed it at your feet as he wrapped his arms around you tightly.

“What are you doing, silly girl? Stealing m’ bed pillows, are you?” he teased, but he felt how strongly you were holding onto him and he knew exactly what you were doing. “God, feels so good to be holding you again.”

“I’ve missed you!” you finally said into his ear. You felt one of his hands move to the back of your head as he kissed into your hair, burying his face into you.

“I’ve missed you, too, babe,” he breathed. “So much.”

He held you for a long moment before pulling away, his hands on either side of your face. 

“So beautiful, you are,” he practically whispered. “Need a proper kiss now, please.”

Neither of you wasted any time diving into a very sensual kiss, almost dirty in its own right. You felt Harry’s hands move to your ass, pulling you against him forcefully and loving it. You were sure you could feel his dick jump slightly against your abdomen, even through both layers of yours and his clothing.

“I need you, babe,” he whispered, desperate for you, slowly backing you toward his bedroom, shutting the door behind him and leading you to the large bed. You felt him quickly slide your short dress up your body and over your head faster than you could have even requested him to. Unbuttoning the button or two that was actually fastened on his shirt, you slid it down his arms and let it drop behind him on the floor. After another deep, lust-filled kiss, he stepped back slightly to gaze at your body from head to toe and back again. You wore his favorite bra and panty set, one he had bought for you initially as a joke, that was stitched along the lacy edging with the words, “property of harry styles”, but had come to really turn him on when you wore them. Still in your high heels, you began to kick them off when he boldly said, “Leave them on.”

You gulped slightly as Harry pressed against you firmly again, holding your hips tightly against his so you could without doubt feel his hard dick growing between your bodies. 

“Do you feel what you do to me, baby?” 

He had a look in his eyes that you recognized as desire. Passion. Lust. His green eyes turned a more intense shade when he was like this.

One thing about Harry that you loved so much was his ability to always make you feel desired. It wasn’t a show. You knew he didn’t do it only to make you horny, or make you crazier during sex. He found pleasuring you to be intoxicating. He loved to watch your face as he manipulated your body or made you cum. He loved inspecting every inch of your body to see how touching you here, or tasting you there, would cause you to writhe beneath his strong body. He became infatuated with sending you into a tail-spin sexually, finding every way possible to arouse you, even teasing that one of these days he was afraid he would cause you to pass out simply from how far he could push you sexually. He loved that you both had a high sex drive and was always eager to try new things.

On the other hand, he also loved the way you kissed him gently…thoughtfully…softly. He was easily turned on by your body, but equally turned on by your personality, your wit, your kindness toward others, your intellect, the level of comfort he enjoyed with you. He could sit and look at you for hours on end, or sit up talking with you all night long about the most mundane subjects and not be bored. He loved feeling your fingers lightly caress his back when he held you for an extra long amount of time. He loved the warmth of your hugs and the scent of your skin. And he loved every thing about you. Although neither of you had said those three words to each other yet, the feelings were there, and you both knew that when it was right, it would happen.

You felt Harry dig his fingers into your sides, grasping you, pulling you into his body as his mouth locked onto your neck, sucking you between his lips, biting at your skin.

“I’ve missed you, Harry,” you whispered desperately in his ear. “Let me…”

He kissed your jaw while sliding his fingers under the band of your panties. “What love?” he asked nervously.

“Lay on the bed,” you told him. He drew back a bit and looked at you, seeing a look of determination in your eyes.

“Anything you say,” he smirked, turning you so that his back was toward the bed. You unfastened his skinny jeans and slid them down his long, lean body as he pushed his pants down with them, kicking them off at the ankles. You kissed him deliberately, then watched as he laid back on the bed, feet still on the floor, but stretched out, eyes wide, watching you. You looked at his eyes, then trailed them down his body and trained them on his fully erect cock, standing proudly, more than ready for what you had in mind. You weren’t sure how, after weeks of sex with Harry, you had not already managed to have his masterpiece in your mouth. Harry was usually the one who wanted to be in charge in the bedroom. He liked having the control, and got such great pleasure from seeing you receive, that he had never thought to ask you for it, and once he started touching you, it was all you could usually do to keep your mind focused. But for the past week or so, it was something you had thought about many times. And now, you were in charge.

You stood between his legs, watching him nervously twirl one of his rings as he watched you. You looked over his body, and licked your lips as you stared at his dick, causing a small groan to catch in his throat. 

“I want,” you started, then corrected yourself. “I need…your cock in my mouth.” You watched him swallow hard. “I want to feel it hit the back of my throat.” He nodded quickly at you then started to touch the head of his cock, but you pushed his hand away. “No,” you said as you shook your head slowly. “It’s mine.”

You dropped forward slowly, placing your arms on either side of his body, and slowly brought your face even with his stiff cock, until he felt your hot breath on it. You tilted your head just enough to lap a flat tongue across the slit of his head, wiping it clean of the salty pre-cum that was already beginning to seep. You heard him suck air in through his teeth.

“Bloody hell,” he whispered as he closed his eyes briefly, then opened them quickly again, watching you, afraid of missing anything. You had already learned that one of Harry’s favorite things about sex is observing. He liked watching as his dick slowly moved in and out of you. He liked seeing your juices drain from your wet heat. He liked watching his cum leak out of your pussy onto the sheets under you. It was his kink, if you want to call it such. And it turned you on that it turned him on so much.

You stood again and raised one leg, setting the heel of your shoe on the mattress next to him, the same shoes Harry had only moments before told you to not remove. He watched you as you slowly moved your hand to your knee, then trailed it up to your panties, rubbing gentle circles over your fabric-covered clit. You felt Harry’s hand around your ankle, slowly moving up your leg, in search of a place more wet and warm. As he nearly reached the silky strip of fabric that barely covered your lips, you gently laid your hand on his and moved it away again.

“Fuck, love, you’re killing me,” he begged, a slight bead of perspiration forming on his forehead and upper lip. “Please.” 

You moved your hand slowly back to your panties and slid your middle finger slowly between your lips and inside, hearing Harry groan more loudly this time. You closed your eyes for a moment, then pulled it back out, placing your foot back on the floor, moving your hand to Harry’s mouth and allowing him to taste your wetness on your finger. He moaned from the taste then looked at you with pleading eyes. You leaned over him again, kissing his bare chest, darting your tongue against his warm skin, and slowly trailing it down his body as you felt him tense and squirm around under you. He tensed his jaw and breathed in through his nose deeply as he felt you getting closer to that part of him that he wanted you to take and destroy. 

Just as you sensed a slight whimper from his throat, close enough to his cock that he felt you even without touching, you looked up at him, your mouth looming closely to him, his head now propped by a bed pillow so he could see everything you did. He groaned again as he felt you drop to your knees between his legs, your lips kissing his swollen, red member, your eyes still focusing on his face. As he felt your mouth close in and down around him, he heard you moan lightly and couldn’t keep himself from twitching between your lips. He felt your hand grip the base of his cock and begin to move in opposing rhythm with your mouth, meeting in the middle, squeezing and sucking him with amazing pressure. You knew Harry was going to be an amazing mouthful, but you were determined to make it the most pleasurable blowjob he had ever experienced. You lifted your mouth off him enough to lick him up and down to coat him in your spit. As your hand continued pumping him, your mouth found his balls and sucked them, one at a time, into your mouth, tugging lightly. You could hear him trying to steady his breathing as his hand found your hair and caressed your head.

“Oh, baby,” he moaned. “Feels so good.”

His affirmations of pleasure made you drip into your panties a bit more. You loved that he was enjoying it as much as you. He tasted so good to you. Why the hell had you waited so long for this?! You moaned again as you lathered him well, loving the salty taste on your taste buds. You heard him breathe more deeply again then felt him jet his hips up into you a bit.

“Sorry, love,” he said, stroking the back of your head. “Sorry.”

“Do it again,” you said, only removing him from your mouth long enough to say it before pumping your hand and mouth on him again.

“Like me to fuck up into your mouth?” he asked, a line of sweat drooling from his forehead onto his chest now as you nodded, looking up at him again, his cock hitting the inside of your cheek. 

“Bloody…” he whimpered, panting, applying pressure to your head with his hand, grabbing your hair then as you apply a bit more pressure, his hips buck up into you again, causing a slight gagging sound as drool seeps out around your lips and hits his groin. He felt your other hand rest on his thigh with slight pressure as you became more aggressive and felt his muscles tense. He strained…“Baby…I’m gonna…fuck…” 

He tried tugging at your hair to get you to pull off him before he came but you refused to stop, moving your head back a bit and sucking the tip of him aggressively, your hand stroking his length, until you felt a sting at your scalp from his pulling, and Harry shooting deeply into your throat with a loud moan, his breathing so quick you were afraid he would hyperventilate. His cock pumped into your throat as you moaned lightly. You looked up at him, his cock still in your mouth but a bit softer now, and saw wild eyes looking back at you as his breathing began to slow. He watched intently as you pulled your head back, lips still tightly around him, allowing him to fall onto himself as you pulled away completely. He watched you in awe as you swallowed, licking your tongue around your swollen red lips, then licking the remnants of his seed off of your hand. Harry closed his eyes and let his head drop to the pillow behind him.

You smiled slightly, knowing he enjoyed it, but also knowing he was probably spent physically for awhile from it. Worth it, you supposed. You liked pleasing him, and you knew you did. You stood again, stretching your aching legs, still in your bra, panties, and high heels, and climbed over his body, looking down on him. He opened his eyes, looking up at you, lifting his arms to pull you down onto him, holding you tightly against him.

“That…was…fuckin’…amazing…” he said quietly into your ear. “Amazing, love. Never had it better, I fuckin’ swear. Thank you. Holy God, thank you.”

You lifted your head and smiled at him, kissing him sweetly, sensing his physical exhaustion.

“I swear, I’ll give it back…just…bloody hell, love…” he chuckled, still slightly breathless.

“It’s okay, babe,” you told him. “Rest up. I’m going to go shower.”

You kissed him quickly on the lips then stood, smiling at the non-moving body lying on the bed in front of you, eyes closed and damp of perspiration. You opened the bedroom door and walked to the entry where your bags still lay, grabbing them and walking back into the bedroom. As you sat your bags on the chair near the bathroom, you heard a light snore coming from the direction of the bed and saw Harry, in the same position, sleeping soundly.

*

You and Harry enjoyed your time together in America, albeit secret, traveling to LA for his work there and experiencing yet another of his properties. You were snuck onto his private flight, but were taken to his home via a separate car, and different route and entrance to the property. You would give him credit where it was due. He had thought it out well to keep your relationship a secret from the public. You knew he did it for your safety and privacy, even if it did bother you a bit that the only time you were with him most of the time, you were hidden away in his home. As much as you would love to be holding his hand as you went with him from interview to interview, you and he both knew it was too risky. That’s why you were so excited on your last night in LA, when he made an announcement to you.

“Love, how would you like to go somewhere tonight?” Harry asked with a smile.

“Really? I can go out?” you asked with glee.

Harry frowned slightly, hoping you hadn’t felt like a caged animal during your time with him.

“Where am I going?” you asked. “I thought you had a show tonight.”

“I do,” he beamed. “And I would like for you to be there. See me perform.”

Your excitement faded slightly from your face, not because you were unhappy, but because you were moved that you were going to finally see him perform. All this time you had known him, you had not once seen him perform solo. You had gone to one of the final One Direction concerts with Alex, but a solo concert had never happened…until now.

“Are you serious?” you asked with tears welling in your eyes.

“Oh, don’t cry, love!” Harry chuckled, pulling you into a gentle hug. “I know it’s not fun being alone while I’m working, and I know you’ve not seen one of my shows yet. And I really want you there.”

“I just can’t believe it,” you said, smiling while wiping away a happy tear. “I didn’t think I would get to see you perform for a long time, until the day came we were ready to be out in public together.”

“Yeah,” he said softly. “We still need to be careful, babe. Still have to do separate cars, separate entrances, tuck you away in the wings where you can’t be seen but you can still see me on stage. I’m sorry, I know it isn’t ideal.”

“No!” you bolted. “No, please! It’s fine! It’s better than not seeing you at all. Harry, I’m so proud of you and your career. Always have been. I’m just so happy to get to experience it with you now.”

He kissed you sweetly then left to allow you to get ready while he went to the next place he was needed. That evening, the car he had sent for you pulled up in front of the building and the driver grinned at you as he opened the door.

“Enjoy your evening, miss,” he cheered, smiling at how excited you appeared to be.

You watched happily out the car windows at the buildings you passed. The lights of the city were bright and abundant, and soon you found yourself being escorted through a back door of the venue, walking hallways until you were finally led to a small room near the backstage area. In a moments time, you saw the door open as Harry walked in. Seeing you and smiling, he closed the door behind him, looking at you as his eyes popped, his heart beating more quickly. He walked to you and wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly then kissing you firmly.

“You look beautiful, love,” he glowed with pride, excited not only as he gets before a performance, but that his girl was there to support him. “So beautiful.” 

He kissed you again, first on your soft lips, then your cheek, then near your ear as he held you again for another moment. In the hallway he heard one of his crew yelling for him.

“Harry! Ten minutes, man!”

He leaned away from you again and took your hand, walking to the door of the little room. He looked at you, then at your hands holding each other, losing a bit of his smile as he knew he couldn’t be seen with you in such a way, gently dropping your hand. He opened the door and showed you to the area where you could stand in the wings to watch the show. He looked at you, then at your lips, wanting badly to receive a kiss of good luck from you, but seeing all the people standing around backstage, some with their cameras trained on Harry, who took a deep breath.

“It’s okay,” you whispered. “Kill it, love. Going to be a great show!”

He smiled at you and nodded, saying he would see you back at the flat after, which would be very late due to after-show rituals and such, but to go ahead and sleep and he would try to not wake you.

You had hoped to get to spend a bit of time with Harry, even if only a moment, after the show, to congratulate him and tell him how wonderful he was. But you understood. The life of a celebrity was sometimes bittersweet, and if it was what you had to deal with to be in a relationship with him, you were okay with that. As the show ended, Harry was whisked off immediately to some sort of after party, it being the last appearance in America. You would have loved to have been able to attend it with him, being the hand he held as he walked around accepting the praises of those attending, but you were the person he was coming home to, and that seemed just as good if not better to you. Watching from a distance, you saw Harry, surrounded by people and camera flashes, smiling and waving to those around him, thanking them for coming and for having him there. You took a deep breath as he quickly became further away from you, before disappearing into the sea of lights and people.

“Miss?” you heard a voice from behind you say, recognizing it as the guard who had accompanied you into the building. You turned and smiled at him. “Your car is ready to take you back now.”

“Thank you,” you replied, following the man down the stretch of hallways and out into the night air once again. You looked at all of the city blocks, filled with people and buildings and nightlife, and thought a lot about what Harry’s life must be like, and what your life with him was bound to be like at some point. You quickly stepped out of the car as it pulled into the drive of Harry’s home, and walked into the large luxury home. Such a big house for one person, you thought, but definitely Harry. He very quickly and comfortably fell into the wealthy lifestyle his popularity and hard work brought, while still being that grounded, down-to-earth guy that you knew was his mother’s influence, even though you had yet to meet his family. You knew it wasn’t that Harry wanted to keep you from them, or anyone for that matter. He was just being careful to not tempt fate where you had, to this point, been lucky that people still had not discovered your relationship. Someday, maybe. Someday you hoped to be that person for him, but for now you would be happy just to spend time with him.

As you walked into the large, quiet home, you felt your phone vibrate and looked at the screen.

Thank you for being there for me tonight. It meant the world to me.~Harry xo

A simple text, during a time when you knew he was so busy he probably couldn’t think a clear thought, but he thought to text you and thank you. Yeah, you had fallen hard for him. And you were more happy than you could ever remember being before.

*

Harry was tired, physically and mentally. He was finally finished with his work in America, and was ready to take the next several days to spend with you and only you. He needed some time to relax and just enjoy doing nothing everyday, rather than running from interview to appearance to meeting. This stretch of work was not a tour or promo of any kind necessarily, merely a long string of obligations with a concert or two thrown into the mix. Harry was dedicated to his work, and had an amazing team he worked with that had a plan for his career and helped him achieve and accomplish it. But it was finished for a bit, and he looked forward to going back home and seeing his family and a few friends for awhile, enjoying a home-cooked meal or two, and spending time alone with you.

“So, H,” Jeffrey asked as they rode in the private car to drop Harry off at his flat. “What’s up with you and this girl? I’m glad to have finally gotten to put a face to the name and stories, but how’s it going with her?”

Harry smiled a huge smile while rubbing his fingers over a tired face. “It’s amazing, Jeffrey,” he said. “We get on great, and I’m really enjoying our time together.”

“What exactly is this that you have with her?” he asked pointedly.

Harry looked at him confused. “What do you mean, what do I have with her?” Harry asked, thinking he must be too tired to understand the question.

“I mean, is she your girlfriend? Are you two just dating? Friends with benefits? Just a good time? You’ve been fortunate so far that you’ve not been discovered. I had no idea until you told me,” Jeffrey admitted.

“You know how it is for me, mate,” Harry shrugged. “Just don’t want the press or fans getting wind of it and make it so crazy that it becomes unsafe or a nuisance for her. She’s really great and I don’t want that for her.”

“I understand that, Harry,” he interjected. “But what exactly is it you have with her?”

Harry started to answer then closed his mouth again, thinking. Neither of you had ever really defined your relationship. Were you his girlfriend? Were the two of you just having fun together, being close friends with a mix of intimacy thrown in here and there? Harry knew, at least for him, it was more than that, but what was it? He had never referred to you as his girlfriend. He had never asked you if you would see him exclusively, although he was sure you dated nobody else. For some reason, maybe due to lack of sleep and being too busy, Harry thought harder on this subject than he probably needed to.

Harry stepped from the car, telling Jeffrey he would talk to him soon, after a few days in a private, secluded holiday spot he had found for the two of you to get away together for awhile. Harry quickly made his way up to the flat and unlocked the door quietly. It was early morning hours and he knew you would be sleeping soundly. He removed his boots so he wouldn’t risk waking you, and walked softly to the master bedroom, opening the door just as softly. He looked toward the bed and grinned to himself, seeing the lump under the covers of his bed, curled up into a ball on his pillow. Not the pillow you had been using, but the one that he used. It was a comfort to you when he was away, being able to smell his scent on the pillow case. He walked to the bed and looked down at you, seeing you sleeping, your chest rising and falling slowly in rhythm, the covers pulled up to your neck because Harry kept the temperature much cooler than what you did in your home, and a hint of a smile on your plump lips, even in your slumber. Harry knelt beside the bed, gently placing his hand on your head and caressing your scalp lightly. 

Why was his conversation with Jeffrey weighing on him so much? He hoped you didn’t think of your relationship with him as just having a good time. It was more than that to him. But Jeffrey was right about something. The two of you hadn’t really defined what it was that you did have together. By this point you had been seeing each other for a few months and neither of you appeared to have any desire to date another. You had decided in the beginning to not label anything yet. To just enjoy spending time together and see what happens. But that was months ago, and Harry was quickly realizing that wasn’t what he wanted anymore. He didn’t want for your relationship to be undefined. Even if you couldn’t share it with the world, he wanted you to know how he felt about you.

Harry stood again after lightly kissing your head, then showered and easily slid into the bed next to you, being gentle so as not to wake you. He carefully moved up behind you, pulling your body gently against his own and holding you, kissing your shoulder lightly a few times, then quickly giving in to the sleep he desperately needed.

*

As your small private jet cut through the puffy white clouds, you were happy to be with him, traveling with him rather than in a separate mode of transportation. He seemed clingy since coming home after the concert and party the night before, but you loved it. If there was a better feeling in the world than Harry’s hand holding yours, his arm around you, or his lips kissing you, you had yet to find it.

You felt Harry squeeze your hand as you turned your head from the window to look at him. His smile met you, then a kiss to your lips, followed by his thumb tracing your bottom lip. You returned his smile and moved your other hand up his arm, gripping softly to him. You realized he was just staring at you, taking you in. He did that sometimes, like he was still memorizing every bit of you, but the look in his eyes this time was different.

“You alright?” you asked him with a grin.

“Never better, love,” he replied, as you nodded your head to him.

In time the small jet landed in the location he had chosen for your private getaway, and you were driven to a small, private beach home. Where, you had no idea, but you honestly didn’t care, either. You were there, with Harry, with nobody anywhere around, in a remote location, with your own private beach spot. Life could be worse.

Harry took your bags from the driver and walked into the beach home with you. It was small and quaint and much different from Harry’s own properties, and you loved the intimacy of it. Small kitchen, little sofa perfect for two to cuddle on, only 2 small bedrooms, and a patio that led out to a small, secluded beach front, that Harry was assured by the management company, was completely private and undetectable by the paparazzi. You looked out the sliding glass doors to the beach. It was beautiful. You couldn’t wait to feel the heat of the sun on your skin while looking out over that majestic view.

You felt Harry’s presence behind you as you looked at the view, feeling his arms wrap around you and his chin resting heavily on your shoulder. His lips kissed your neck, then took a small nibble as your hands moved up to grab his arms around your chest.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” you said sweetly. “It’s beautiful.”

“Only sight more beautiful, I have my arms around,” he flirted while still kissing your neck.

“I mean, thank you for wanting me here with you,” you say with intent. You knew Harry has feelings for you, even if neither of you have ever put a label to what you have together. Stupid labels. What were they anyway? And why was it bothering you so much that you’d yet to have one with Harry? Just be happy you’re with him, you dolt! you chastised yourself in your mind. Harry doesn’t owe you a label. It had only been a few months. A few months of flirting. A few months of spending countless hours together. A few months of texts and phone calls and video chats. A few months of intimacy, tasting each other, bringing each other to climax over and over again.

“Just wanted to spend a little holiday with you, before you have to go back to work and I go back into the studio in London for a spell,” he reminded you.

You appreciated it, but that still wasn’t your point of thanking him. You were thankful that he had chosen you to be the one that he wanted to spend his time with. He had women falling at his feet around the world, and you were the one he wanted to be around. You knew he wasn’t the playboy that the media always tried to make him out to be. You had known him long enough now to know better than that. You only hoped that Harry understood exactly how you felt about him. Neither of you had yet to say “the L word”. Not that either of you questioned that you had love for each other, but loving someone and being in love with someone were two different things. You both wanted it to happen naturally, yet both were afraid to say it and then not hear it from the other in return, so for the time, you both seemed to just keep it to yourselves.

The two of you enjoyed a few days cuddling on the beach, swimming in the ocean, and soaking in the rays of the sun. The night before you were to fly back to London, Harry was clingy once again. You loved that he always liked to be touching you somewhere…his hand on your leg as you had dinner, his arm around your shoulders as you watched a movie on the sofa, leaning his body back against you, squishing you between him and the kitchen counter as you cuddle into his back, pressing pert kisses to your mouth as you stood next to him watching him cook your breakfast. But Harry sensed you were becoming a bit tense, knowing your time together over the past 3 weeks was nearly over, and you would soon be returning to work to finish the exclusive you and Harry had been working on here and there, and making the arrangements for the small, intimate photo shoot to boost it.

After you finished getting ready for bed, brushing your teeth, relieving your bladder, and raking your fingers through your hair, you sat on the side of the bed, plugging your phone into its charger and setting it on the side table. You felt Harry’s hand rubbing up and down your back and turned off the little lamp next to the bed and yawned.

“Come ‘ere, love,” Harry said as he pulled your arm his direction, coaxing you to lay down next to him. You did as he requested, not really sleepy, but knowing you had to be up early to be at the airport on time. You lay back against your pillow, but Harry pulled you closer to him, away from the edge of the bed, nearer to the center.

“What are you doing?” you giggled as he pushed the covers back down as you tried to raise them.

“Seem tense, babe,” Harry observed, kissing your neck and rubbing his hand lightly between your tummy and his t-shirt that you’re wearing. “Are you stressed about going back? Your article or something?”

You sigh softly. “I don’t know. Maybe a little. Been enjoying this, you know?” you smiled at him.

“Trust me, I know. I have, as well,” he smiled back, moving his kisses to your jaw. “Let me help you relax, love.” You felt his gentle kisses pepper your neck slowly, in no hurry, simply enjoying making contact with your skin. “Close your eyes. Clear your mind. Relax.”

You swooned inside as you closed your eyes, enjoying the soft way Harry was helping you release your stress. You felt his other hand gently caress your scalp, playing with your hair, while moving his kisses along your hairline. You felt him lightly kiss each of your eyelids, your brow, your nose, covering your face one gentle kiss at a time. His soft mouth nibbled at your jaw lightly, followed by a soothing kiss, as his other hand continued to rub lightly across your tummy. His finger traced a smooth line back and forth along the trim of your panties. You felt his hand move slowly and gently around your body, softly massaging your skin and muscles with his touch to your shoulder, your arms, your chest and stomach, and down your hip and thigh, kneading gently in his attempt to help you relax. You feel his mouth next to your ear.

“Feel good, baby?” he whispered.

“Mmm,” you groaned lightly and nodded your head slightly, turning your face to meet his lips against your temple.

“Wanna help you relax completely, babe,” he whispered. “Make you feel good.”

Harry ghosted his lips across your jaw before finding your lips, as you turned into his kiss. His lips were so soft against your own, a hint of the same minty toothpaste that you used only a few minutes before. You felt his lips lightly pass over yours again, but not kissing yours, just brushing past as he placed another soft kiss on your neck just below your ear. His hand crept up to your breast, cupping it gently, tugging your already perky nipple through his fingers. You felt his hot breath around you and felt the heat rising between your legs, relaxing your thighs as they naturally fell open a bit more. He took his time with you, touching your neck, kissing your shoulders, biting gently at your earlobe, sucking into his mouth and teasing it with the tip of his tongue. He teased his kisses around your lips, making you crave them to the point that you moaned slightly in protest when he didn’t leave one against yours. His tongue gently slid over your bottom lip, licking its fullness, and biting it playfully to plump it to the size and color he had learned to love during sex. You finally felt his tongue dip into your mouth again, softly, sweetly, all the while his hand touching you gently, in every place except where you would like for it to be.

“Let’s slide these off, love,” he tugged at your panties, sliding them down your hips as you gently lifted your ass from the mattress to allow him. You felt his hand move up your hip slowly, finding your waist and rubbing lightly across you tummy, as he again kissed around your face.

“Just let go, babe,” he whispered in your ear. “Eyes closed, no stress or worries. Just us.”

“Mmm,” you groaned, as he saw your eyes closed and felt the tension gone in your body. He saw your jaw relax as your mouth fell open slightly. “Feels good,” you whispered.

“Shhh,” he shushed lightly in your ear. “Shhh.” 

Harry moved even closer against your body so you could feel how hard he was against your hip. You knew that must be painful and you would love to help him with it, but at that moment, you were numb, prisoner to his touch. You felt his hand move upward again, finding your jaw, then your lips, then gently opening your mouth as he poked two of his fingers inside your mouth. 

“Make them good and wet for me, love,” he asked softly, as you felt his tongue pull your earlobe between his lips again. You heard him moan in his throat, his own breathing increasing a bit as his dick ached, filling with blood, wanting your mouth on it just as it was on his fingers. You felt his leg firmly pull your leg toward him, spreading your thighs further apart, as he pulled his fingers out and kissed you deeply, moving his saliva-soaked fingers eagerly to your clit. You breathed in deeply and moaned. “Shhh,” he reminded you, then whispered. “It’s okay, baby. Just relax. I’ve got you.”

You felt his wet fingers slowly rub your little button until it was jumpy and swollen, then slowly moved to your juicy lips between your legs. He kept his mouth next to your ear, only leaving your ear to kiss your jaw or your cheek. Harry pressed his forehead against the side of your head, concentrating on how his hand would help you find complete relaxation soon. You felt one of his fingers slide between your lips and into you a couple of inches. Besides both of you breathing more rapidly than normal, the finger he had inside of you, rubbing gently at your walls, was the only thing moving on that bed. You felt his finger rubbing slowly against you, then curling against the roof of your heated hole. He heard you exhale as you opened your mouth a bit more, as he kissed your jaw.

“So wet, baby,” he whispered in your ear. “So hot and wet, pullin’ my finger into you.” He slowly pulled his finger out, adding the other wet digit you had sucked for him, applying a bit more pressure as he rubbed you inside. A slight moan escaped your throat, as Harry intensified the pressure and motion of his stroking, your neck arching slightly into your pillow. “That’s it,” he whispered as he felt you swelling, ballooning against his fingers. “That’s it.”

“Harry,” you whispered.

“Shhh,” he prompted into your ear quietly.

“Harry…need…to pee…” you said breathlessly, but making no movement to act upon it.

“It’s okay, love,” he assured you quietly. “Relax.”

You felt him gently kiss and lick your jaw and cheek as he continued his relentless pursuit of stroking you perfectly against your spongey spot, until he heard your juices squishing around his fingers, your breath catching near his ear.

“That’s it, baby, that’s it,” he coaxed into your ear. “Cum all over my fingers, love.” 

Your hands moved to his wrist, as it began feeling almost too good, attempting to pull his hand out, but he refused and applied more pressure to your needy spot. He felt your body begin to tremble and quake and looked at your face, glancing back and forth between your expression, and where his hand was pleasuring you, until he heard you release a loud moan, your liquids exploding out of you, not only wetting his fingers but splashing its wetness nearly to the crook of his elbow.

“Bloody fuckin’ hell!” he finally breathed, not pulling his fingers from you, or relinquishing pressure from inside you, until he knew you had ridden out the orgasm to its fullest. He heard you begin to breath again, panting quickly, as your body continued to spasm in orgasmic bliss, choking his fingers inside of you. He felt you finally clamp your legs around his hand as you slowly regained a more normal breathing pattern, and the trembling of your thighs began to subside. He held you tightly, kissing you everywhere his lips would reach, not yet removing his fingers, until he felt you finally open your legs once again.

“Did so good for me, love,” he whispered into your ear, as his fingers slid out of you and he rubbed you softly between your legs, soothing you gently. “So good, baby.” 

He lifted his arm and showed you the juices still dripping from it, a couple of them dripping onto your chest and stomach. You lifted your arm, pulling his arm to your mouth, and sucked on one of his fingers, tasting your sweet juices on him. You saw the look on his face change once again, as an “Uungh” fell out of his throat, causing him to push his still throbbing dick against your hip without even realizing he was doing it. He brought his arm to his mouth and licked his tongue up toward his wrist, moaning slightly, loving your taste. He pulled you tightly against him and kissed you deeply, passionately, still tasting the slight sweetness attached to both of your tongues. He pulled away slightly and looked at you.

“May need just a moment, then I owe you,” you giggled. “Fuck, do I ever owe you.”

“No worries, love,” he looked down at his still prominent dick. “Don’t think that’s going anywhere until you’re ready for it.” He kissed you as you both giggled, then he pulled away again. “Love, do you think this coming weekend, we could take a short trip?”

Closing your eyes a second, still trying to think clearly through your bliss, you answered. “Well, yeah sure. Where are you wanting to go?”

“Back home,” he answered with a grin, kissing your lips softly.

“You…” you nearly choked out, “You want me to go back home with you?” He nodded and smiled. “Are you sure, Harry? I mean, yeah, but you’re sure?”

He smiled at you and squeezed your body into his. “Need m’ mum to meet the girl I’m in love with, don’t I?”

****************

There you go! Chapter Three of For the Love of Harry, completed. I hope you like it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Honestly when I started this chapter, I was stumped, not sure where I wanted to go with it, and had initially decided it would be the final chapter so I could move on to my next story. But the ideas are already flowing for the continuation, so if you liked this one, please let me know and I will continue the story and post it soon. Apologies for any mistakes in this post. I wrote through a sleepless night, my nephew having gone in for brain surgery yesterday, so my thoughts are a bit weary and worn. Thanks for reading, lovelies!

Much love! xo

This is going to hurt

Hi, I start telling ya I love your stories with all my heart! 
I’d like to make a request about the 22nd March prompt “this is going to hurt” . I’ve got an idea for so long in my mind: reader, who’s Jon Snow’s lover has been kidnapped by Ramsay Bolton in order to threaten Jon.
When our favourite wolf arrives on the field, Ramsay flays part of reader’s skin in front of Jon and his army. Later, after the battle, reader dies in Jon’s arms. 
Thanks :)

Jon Snow (and Ramsay Bolton) - “This is going to hurt”

“I can’t wait to show your lover where you have been all this time.” Ramsay wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pressed you tighter to his chest. “He must have missed you and yet the thought that you were with me has never crossed his mind.” Ramsay smiled and clacked his tongue. “The white wolf might have inherited the courage of his father, he does lack a certain amount of intelligence, don’t you think?”

You didn’t answer. Over the years you had learned that not answering Ramsay was still better than giving him an answer that didn’t live up to his expectations. No matter what you did or attempted, he always found a reason to punish you for something you had or had not done.

“I do think we should give our noble warrior some proper motivation, shall we?” Ramsay didn’t give you the chance to answer the question. Without any other warning he lifted you up and placed you in front of him in the saddle. “You will love the battlefield, I am sure of it.”

You hated the battlefield. You had already hated battlefields before Robb had died, before Ned had dark. Now you had grown to hate them even more. You didn’t believe in winners on the battlefield. You only believed in survivors and losers. And you hoped that Jon would end up a survivor and Ramsay would end up a loser.

“At least he and his army have arrived in time.” Ramsay ordered his horse to stop. With a smirk on his face he slid down and then he opened his arms to help you off his horse too.

You trembled when you saw that Jon was watching you. You were standing too far away to read the glance in his eyes, but you saw how tensed his muscles were. Strangely enough you weren’t afraid of what would happen to you. You had faced the worst and whatever would come would be nothing but a trick to distract Jon. You were however afraid that he would fall for it, that he would try to save you while everyone knew that once someone fell in the hands of Ramsay Bolton they couldn’t be saved anymore.

“I’m sorry, love, but this is going to hurt.” Ramsay smiled while he curled his fingers around a sharp knife. “I wonder if he will be able to win this battle in time to save you from bleeding to death.” Ramsay touched your cheek with the back of his hand before the knife started to cut parts of your skin away.

You had sworn yourself years ago already to never scream again because of Ramsay. You had sworn yourself years ago already not to give him the satisfaction anymore. You had managed to keep the promise to yourself. Until now. You had thought that you knew what pain was, but this was a different kind of pain and while Ramsay flayed more and more parts of your skin you closed your eyes and gave in to the urges of your body.

“No….”

You only dared to open your eyes again when you heard a well known voice and felt a pair of strong arms holding your harmed body. A smile spread across your face and you stared at his blooded skin, his long hair, tied into a bun, his dark armor only slightly damaged. “You won!” You wanted to lift your arm up, but realized that your muscles weren’t listening to your mind anymore.

“I won…” Jon’s eyes started to water and he used his hand to wipe the hair from your face. “But I am not willing to pay the price I’m afraid I have to pay.” He sat on his knees next to you and he bent his head so his forehead touched yours.

“It’s okay, Jon.” You swallowed. Your voice was breakable and barely a whisper. “I knew that I would die the moment Ramsay found me in the woods.” You started to breath faster, unable to get enough air to fill your lungs. “At least he kept me alive long enough to be able to tell you that I love you and that I’m proud of you.” Your heart slowed down and even though you were not in pain anymore, you knew your soul was already drifting away to who knew where.

“He will die tonight. For what he did to you. For what he did to my sister.” Jon pressed a soft kiss on your cold lips and he lifted you up to press you to his chest. “I love you and no matter how much time passes, I will never stop loving you.” He pressed a soft kiss on your forehead and your lips curled up into a smile while you closed your eyes unable to fight death any longer. He had said that he loved you and that was all you needed to know.

Fate/Apocrypha starters

  • “It’s boring, but easy.”
  • “A fake can only go so far.”
  • “You shall perish as befit of an imitation!”
  • “Let the tyrant tremble with fear! Let the tyrant repent”
  • “This is a tale of people fulfilling their wishes.”
  • “Mage students are so carefree these days.”
  • “I’ve been waiting for you, necromancer.”
  • “Tales of your deeds preceed you.”
  • “Crawl and beg as much as you want, the answer is no.”
  • “So you want me to become a Master and fight in the Holy Grail War?”
  • “This Holy Grail War is a little different from the others.”
  • “Have you ever felt that everything so far was only for this moment?”
  • “First-class Servants require immense amounts of magical energy. It’s only logical to offload that burden to someone else.”
  • “I would not declare our victory so soon, but we could not have been more prepared than this.”
  • “Swear your fealty to me, and my life shall be your sword.”
  • “Eternal glory comes to those who attain victory!”
  • “This is a tale of immortal heroes seeking glory in vanity.”
  • “Keep banishing the darkness to the bitter end.”
  • “I’ll be the victor who knows no fear.”
  • “Head for complete victory while your breath lasts.”
  • “Pretty please with a cherry on top.”
  • “Sorry! I didn’t mean to upset you.”
  • “You didn’t pick the most chipper place to summon me.”
  • “Are you a necromancer or something?”
  • “I spent my youth surrounded by corpses.”
  • “Let’s not be hasty…”
  • “Next time you call me a woman I’ll be using your throat as a sheath.”
  • “It’s time to confess to our good priest.”
  • “Are you done yet?”
  • “I appreciate that you care so much, but don’t exhaust yourself just yet.”
  • “I do have ambitions, but I have to achieve those by my own means.”
  • “Are you taking me for a fool?”
  • “What do you think I lacked in life?”
  • “I never had enough men suited to leading my armies.”
  • “We must now focus on the present.”
  • “This is the designated place. Were you the one who called for me?”
  • “Are you bad at working in teams?”
  • “The enemy is an organized army. If you act without coordinating, we will be at a disadvantage. Do you still refuse to cooperate?”
  • “I trust your intuition.”
  • “Wait, I’ve got a favor to ask.”
  • “They were on their guard.”
  • “A horse, a horse. My kingdom for a horse!”
  • “Does nothing but nonsense ever come out of your mouth?”
  • “Your words sadden me greatly.”
  • “An affront to my works is an affront to myself.”
  • “And? What do you want?”
  • “We’re in the middle of enemy territory, yet no one’s attacking us.”
  • “Ah, I get it. You wanted to lure them out but you’d rather do it yourself than ask me to do it.”
  • “Aren’t you the reckless one?”
  • “We put up quite the show.”
  • “We’re not exactly leaving empty-handed.”
  • “More importantly, what did you think of my moves?”
  • “I’ve been waiting for you.”
  • “I realized that the future I wanted was forever out of reach.”
  • “There is no turning back on the path I walk.”

I wish the graveyard could teach me 
silence, patience, how to lay things to rest 
the stones don’t stir above the bodies 
and I am left looking to the ground-
in moments when we don’t want to cry
we often look to the sky 
as though it can keep the tears in
but I am ready to flood, soak and seep
into the earth looking for a sign 
that there is peace even if I must wait
even if the seasons change and friends 
fall under the dirt first, maybe it 
is all for the best that I am still here, 
waiting and watching Time go by,
not yet buried with so much dirt still
underneath my nails to be scraped out

- long walks || O.L.

Week Five: Mrs Fitz

The premise: What if Claire had conceived on her wedding night with Jamie?

You can find previous weeks/chapters here.


July 6th, 1743; Claire’s Surgery at Castle Leoch.

My dungeon of a surgery had found another use while I was away, but Mrs Fitz seemed eager for me to return to my duties and cheerfully gave me back my space. She and her small regiment of young women had just finished toting the last of the impedimenta away, leaving me in blissful solitude. The bustle of the kitchens could be heard thru the open doorway and I moved to shut it.

This done, I plodded back to my work table and sat down heavily on the stool.

Why was I so tired?

Traveling about the Scottish Highlands had certainly been taxing to an extent, but we’d returned to Leoch four days ago and I’d had ample time to catch up on sleep. Even if I hadn’t, I was used to operating on minimal sleep for days at a time. I thought I might even thrive on it. A few hours here and there were more than enough to carry me thru the day.

Propping my head in my hands, I slid my eyes shut and tried to pinpoint the cause.

Maybe I had misdiagnosed my nervous stomach.

I hadn’t been ill enough for it to have been full-on food poisoning and no one else fell ill. Even if something I ate had caused the stomach upset four days ago, it would be long out of my system by now.

I mentally shook my head; it wasn’t that.

I certainly could have contracted a virus from the many people I came into contact with in the last week. The flu would explain the vomiting, as well as my residual lack of energy, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the overwhelming feeling of fatigue had started before I had gotten sick.

Fatigue. Nausea. Tender breasts.

No. I can’t be.

Bolting out of my seat, I frantically dug thru the drawer where I kept my daily log. I hadn’t written in it very faithfully, especially while I was on the road, but it was the closest thing I had to a calendar.

My heart raced as I flipped back thru the pages.

I had my courses while traveling, hadn’t I?

I found the ones pertaining to rent collecting and my subsequent marriage, but they had no mention of my monthly visitor.

Hadn’t I?

May 29th, 1743 - Monthly begins.

June 2nd, 1743 - Left Castle Leoch at daybreak. 

I frantically flipped to an empty page and hastily sketched out the days, not wanting to entrust this to mental calculation.

Four weeks would be…

Last week.

It should have started the twenty-sixth of June and it was now the sixth of July, making me ten days late.

I’m never late.

The world seemed to spin around me as I slid against the wall to the floor, curling myself into a tight ball. My heart screamed that I couldn’t be pregnant, that I was simply late and stressed, but the incessant stream of logic in my mind told me that pregnancy was the most probable cause.

I’m pregnant. I’m going to have a baby.

It was at this very moment that the door swung open and Mrs Fitz’s cheery voice greeted me from the entryway, shattering the fragile moment into a hundred different pieces of fear and uncertainty.

“I found ye a wee bit o’–” she stopped suddenly as she came around the corner, “Ach, Claire! Whatever’s the matter, lass?”

Should I tell her? It was really Jamie’s news to hear first.

The very thought of telling Jamie I was pregnant with his child sent me scrambling across the floor in search of something to vomit in. I reached the bucket in time to turn away from Mrs Fitz as I retched. Tears fell from my cheeks, mingling with my stomach contents at the bottom of the bucket.

I heard Mrs Fitz softly pad across the room behind me before she lowered herself to the floor and began to rub soothing circles between my shoulder blades, “Ye dinna have to say a word, lass, I ken just wha’ yer feelin’.”

Oh, she does, does she? She KENS what it feels like to be pregnant by a man who you do not love? To be separated from the one you do?

I must have muttered aloud, for she cheerfully replied, “Oh, aye. I was sick as a dog wi’ all o’ my bairns. Dinna fash, it doesna last forever.”

Wiping my mouth on the hem of my apron, I pushed the bucket aside. Mrs Fitz smiled at me as she reassuringly patted my arm. I made no attempt to smile in return, but instead petitioned, “You won’t speak a word of this, will you?”

“‘Tis yer news to tell, lass.” She waved away my concern, then added, “Jamie must be proud as a peacock, aye?”

Unable to meet her gaze, I answered, “He doesn’t know. Not yet, I mean.”

She took my face in her worn, wrinkled hands and waited to speak until I looked up at her.  Her voice was gentle, without a hint of reprimand. “‘Tis a noble an’ holy thing to bear yer husband’s child, lass, no’ a thing to be ashamed of. Ye’ve given Jamie a great blessing.”

“But I don’t love him,” my throat tightened around the words, unable to fully explain myself. “I can’t, I mean, I still…”

Jamie knew it, but I wasn’t sure that I had ever actually said it out loud.

I still loved Frank.

I gave my body freely to Jamie, my time, my energy, but I could not give him my heart, for it belonged to another.

Her smile wobbled as her eyes grew misty, “I was married twice, myself, lass, an’ I didna love my second husband when we wed. ‘Twas a match arranged by the Laird an’ no’ wha’ I wished, but I did grow to love him in my own way. He was a good man, as is yer Jamie.”

Jamie was a good man. He had promised me the protection of his body and name, a vow he had kept when I put to the test. I knew that, heedless of the cost, he would do whatever it took to ensure that I was safe and cared for.

It wasn’t Jamie’s integrity that I was concerned about, it was what would happen next.

“I ken ye fear wha’ the morrow may bring, but let it be as it may. Dinna waste these precious days of carrying yer bairn by worryin’ over what ye canna change,” Mrs Fitz seemed to read my mind.

Her words rang in my ears like a resounding bell, a single phrase reverberating higher than the rest.

Carrying my child.

It took two to create a child, yes, yet this baby would be mine. He or she would bear their father’s name and maybe his looks, but I would be the one to shelter them within me, to carry them beneath my heart, to give them life even if it cost me my own.

It was in this moment, this hush between the wise and the yearning, that I knew without a doubt that I would love them. Daughter or son, it didn’t matter. A baby of my very own to care for, a child to raise, a legacy to leave behind.

After assuring Mrs Fitz that I would be fine and triple checking that the door was bolted behind her, I lay in the bed that was tucked into the corner of my surgery, wrestling with my thoughts. My knees were pulled tight to my chest, my cheeks wet with tears.

Why now? The question circled around and around above my head. I had tried to get pregnant for seven long years, why now?

A conversation I had with Frank right before I left flickered thru my mind. We had been speaking of adoption, of caring for a child who had been orphaned in the war since it seemed we could not have one of our own.

His words haunted me, a cold, icy fist squeezing around my heart.

“I couldn’t feel properly towards a child that was not of my blood.”

What would Frank’s reaction to my return be if I was pregnant with another man’s child? Would he divorce me? Leave me and the child alone in the world? Would I be better off here, in the past with the father of my child, than in the future, shunned by the man that I loved? Or would he support us, all the while holding the shame of my infidelity over my head like a guillotine blade?

There were too many questions, too many scenarios of a future I could not predict.

“Jamie must be proud as a peacock.”

He would be. I knew he would be.

I didn’t doubt that his reaction to my news would be anything but joyful, but that wasn’t the problem.

The problem was that I wasn’t.

I didn’t know exactly what I was, just at the moment, but joyful wasn’t it.

A loud pounding woke me some time later. The shadows stretched long and slender across the floor as I sat up and moved slowly towards the door.

“Sassenach?” A voice called between emphatic knocks.

Jamie.

I stopped dead in my tracks, unsure of what to do.

“Claire?” He was quickly becoming concerned, “Are ye alright?”

“Coming!” I called, but made no move to do so.

Do I tell him now? Today? Or should I wait until I’m absolutely sure?

You are sure, a little voice ridiculed me, you just don’t want to admit it.

“If ye dinna come to the door, Sassenach, I’ll–”

Visions of him knocking the door off it’s hinges propelled me forward, quickly letting him in before he gave the castle folk enough gossip-fodder to last until next year.

“Or you’ll what?” I quipped as I stared at his shirt front, trying desperately to act normal.

Jamie shrugged, mumbling something about regretting putting the bolt there in the first place. He shoved his left hand towards me, palm up, as he gestured vaguely to it with his right.

“I, ah, am in need of yer skills,” he supplied.

After leading him to the windows that lined the southern wall and turning his hand this way and that for several minutes, I looked up at him in confusion. “What am I looking for?”

“A sliver, just there.” A blush began at the base of his neck and slowly crept its way up to his ears, turning them a dull pink.

I had to bring his hand right up to my nose to find the speck he was talking about.

“This tiny thing?” I asked incredulously. How a fleck of wood that small made its way thru his thick calluses was beyond me and told him so. “How did you even notice it was there?”

He shifted from foot to foot, smiling slightly as he looked at the floor. “Oh aye, well…”

“You know, you don’t have to come up with an excuse to visit your wife.” I dropped his hand and crossed my arms as I felt a smile tug at the corner of my mouth, my voice dropping as I teased him. “You can just stop by to say you missed me.”

His head snapped up, a huge grin spreading across his face.

A good man, indeed.

July 9th, 1743; Castle Leoch

Morning sickness is a lie, I fumed as I heaved into my bucket for the third time today. If only it would bloody stay in the morning.

It was almost time for the evening meal and I had no appetite what so ever. In fact, the very thought of enduring another aromatic meal filled with haggis and neeps in the great hall made me gag.

The nagging voice came again, You have to tell him.

I shoved the thought aside as I rinsed out the bucket and placed it underneath my work table, hidden from view.

Out of sight, out of mind.
..
TimDrakeWeek 2017 Day 2: Childhood/Adulthood DamiTim

Excited to try this with @iphoenixrising, @the-all-seer and @rahndom if they still want to jump and do a day. :D So far it’s been really fun.


Damian outgrew Tim in his fifteenth year.

In that summer to be precise. Though the sun baked the concrete to the point that everyone stayed inside to not fry to death...it had been a very dark summer for Tim.

Damian hadn’t been subtle at all. Anytime Tim stopped by the manor for a chemical analysis, a briefing from B or retrieve a casefile the current robin would stand side by side next to Tim. Look, compare and smirk. In June the brat was about to the bridge of his nose, by August…he was a hair taller.

“A centimeter is more than a hair I believe, Drake.”

“It’s the width of your pinky, now stop gloating.” With a hand, he pushes Damian back slightly. The teen’s been bad with personal space lately. Crowding him against walls before a mission just to prove heights is rude, dude. It’s almost as if the assassin is relishing the fact that now he can look down on Tim physically as well as emotionally.

“I’m just admiring my new perspective. This angle is surprisingly pleasing to me.” See. Tim doesn’t even know why he’s pissed. He should have been resigned the moment the tiny hell child announced Bruce was his father.

Still the fact itches. “Look, I know oxygen is thinner up there, but could you try not to lose too many brain cells?”

“I’ll try, though the weather up here is quite lovely.” Oh Alfred’s Apple Pie, Damians learned puns. Now Tim has to murder Dick. Especially when the smile Damian gives has a touch of fang. “Now come along, father needs us.”

The boy, ‘cause height difference or not that’s what he is, turns away dramatically after beckoning Tim to follow him.

“Worst. Summer. Ever.”

Dick of course makes it worse, “Who’s my shortest adorable brother?” He coos obnoxiously. Like one of those fat women making baby noises at their pet dog. His palms squish either side of Tim’s face and Tim swears to all higher powers that if Dick tries to rub their noses together he’s gonna bite him. “You are! You’re officially the shortest ruthless vigilante in the family now. I should twitter about this…to everyone.”

“If you don’t get your hands off me right now, I’m going to string you in your underwear somewhere for Bab’s viewing pleasure again.”

Dick’s fingers fly off his face as if it’s scalding. “Awwwwww, you don’t have to get that vicious Timmy.”

“I’m always this vicious, you dick. One day my pain will be yours and on that day I’ll will  remember this moment and you will be sorry.” Tim promises with spite.

Dick coyly presses a hand over his heart, “Oh Timmy, my darling petite–omph,” Dick could dodge the first strike to his thorax, but not the second. But still he wheezes out, “That would never happen!”

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Burned Pt. 3 [M]

Genre: Smut, Angst, Fluff (finally)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Triggers: drinking, sex, language 

Word Count: 6.2k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

A/N: The story I posted this morning was not something I was proud of. I rushed the ending and didn’t take the time to flush it out in ways that I wanted to so I removed the post. I finally have a finished product that I’m really happy with. I hope you enjoy this final installment of Burned and I hope you stick around. I have plenty more stories to tell. <3 

You barely remember him being there. He had slipped into your apartment, using the spare key you hide in the pot on the back porch. He didn’t really speak to you, but you remembered he covered you with a blanket and set down a glass of water in front of you. He told you there was ramen in the cabinet and takeout in the fridge. Without saying another word he was back out the door again.

You pulled yourself out off the couch, contemplated doing the dishes that had piled up, but you decided that you needed to take one step at a time. You had drawn all the blinds and the darkness of your apartment made it hard to see. Your bones ached as you walked down the hallway to the bathroom.

The reflection is the mirror was something you didn’t recognize. Your eyes were hollowed with deep purple circles underneath. Your hair was a mess and desperately needed a comb through it. Stepping into the shower, you turned on cool water. Your body had had enough heat already. The last of the bruises he gave you were finally turning yellow. A sign that your physical form was almost done with Park Jimin. It was a small relief, that you wouldn’t have to see the reminders of him lingering on your body.

Pulling the sheets off the bed you threw them all in the laundry. Replacing them with your childhood sheets that you held onto when you needed the comfort of home while you were hundreds of miles away. The only scent lingering was the smell of your lavender detergent. You drifted off into a dreamless sleep, finally letting your body get some rest.

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