and with this quote i say goodnight

Hold my hand in the car. Tell me about your dreams and the reason your mom cries. Hug me in the book section of the store and kiss my cheek while I read. Fall asleep with your head on my chest. Hold tightly to my arm while we watch movies. Kiss me quick and soft or long and hard but just kiss me. Call me to say goodnight and text me when you have a bad dream. Learn my favorite things and understand my different moods. God forbid though if you fall in love with me. Don’t be foolish because you know that’s not what you want. I am not what you want.
—  The two lovers that never loved

I realized that I didn’t know what else to do.

That’s when I finally understood… There’s nothing left to do.

You’re gone and that has to be okay with me.

—  It’s not though
I want somebody who will tell me goodnight, offer to get me more water, and most likely end up having to pull whatever’s in my hands away from me so I can sleep.
I want somebody who knows how to make all my favorite foods and will bring me breakfast on Saturday mornings when I get distracted (probably writing) and forget to eat.
I want somebody who always listens attentively and responds with genuine interest when I get going and ramble on and on and on excitedly about everything and anything and whatever’s in between.
I want somebody who is equally comfortable with silence, and won’t expect me to struggle through a conversation when I’m not in the mood, but rather will sit with me and watch Netflix shows and let me know I’m still just as wonderful when I’m too tired for small talk.
I want somebody who notices when I’m not doing okay. Somebody who takes my hand when I give them those “help, I’m scared” looks in crowded public places and rubs circles into my palm to calm me down. Somebody who asks me how I’m doing, and means it. Somebody who insists I stop and take a break when I get sick or just burned out. Somebody who doesn’t believe me when I say I’m fine.
I want somebody who will tell me they love me in 100 different ways, so as long as I’m listening I’ll always know.
—  take an umbrella, it’s raining // c.r.h.
Take my hand and drag me back to where we were. I don’t want to let you go but I woke up this morning and found that you were the last person that I wanted to talk to. I guess I had to move on eventually. Who would have thought it would make me feel so selfish? I wanted to be everything you needed. I guess that just makes me stupid. Please, don’t let me go. Please, come back for me. Please, take me home again.
—  Pathetic and desperate
I don’t want you to know how hurt I am, I just keep swallowing the lumps in my throat and hope that the tears don’t escape my sad eyes..
if the last thing
I’ll ever get to say to you
is the goodnight,
I whispered,
choking back tears,
then please understand that
is me being too afraid
to tell you
how much I loved you
in that moment,
every moment before that,
every moment still,
even as I pull further
away from you,
and know that
it will always haunt me,
the regret of merely saying
—  m.m., “goodnight”