and this is what happens when i return

Let Her Go (Part Three)

Pairing: Mick Davies x Reader

Word Count: 1054

Warnings: SO ANGSTY

Notes: I’m just so sorry…. This is the third and final part of Let Her Go. Thank you guys so much for your support <3

Part One  Part Two


Reader’s POV:


Grabbing your bag, you shut your bedroom door behind you and made your way to the garage.

“I’ll see you guys, later,” you called out as you sent a quick text to Claire.

When you gained no response, you stopped in the war room and quirked a brow, looking around. “Sam?” You wandered into the kitchen and then the library. “Dean?”

You returned to the war room after going full circle and frowned. It wasn’t like them to leave and not tell you. It was so out of character. You tried to trace back to last night and figure out what could have happened to…

“Oh no…” Your eyes were huge as you realised. They had no doubt gone to Mick, told him about what had happened.

Panicking, you scrolled through your contacts and picked Dean’s name from the list, waiting anxiously for your phone to dial.

“Hello?” Sam answered, sounding wary.

“Where the hell are you guys?! And why isn’t Dean answering his own phone?”

“He’s driving,” he replied sheepishly. “Y/N, we went to see Mick.. I’m..”

“What the hell were you thinking?!” you roared, your free hand tugging at your hair as you began to pace. “I told you that wasn’t your choice to make, Sam!”

“I know,” he said quickly, worried you were going to interrupt him again. “And we’re sorry. Mick didn’t take it well” The bunker door opened behind you and caught your attention. “He trashed his office and broke Dean’s nose. And he’s…”

“Here…” you breathed, staring up at Mick’s enraged, trembling figure as you hung up on the youngest Winchester.


Keep reading

Condoms and Toothpaste

A little Sterek drabble based on this tumblr post. Lots of love to @christinewolf​ for letting me bounce ideas of her and also giving me a few in return. She’s a great cheerleader and I love her a whole lot.

Also on AO3.


Derek isn’t exactly what you call a stable human being. He’s pretty messed up. A little bit lonely. Kind of an insomniac. Just a bit.

Usually, when he’s feeling a little too energized at three in the fucking morning, he goes grocery shopping.

Which is what he is currently doing. This happens at least once a week.  He has a problem.

He’s trying to decide between two different brands of toothpaste (it’s a hard decision, they both promise fresh breath and shiny white teeth, give him a break) when he sees someone in his peripheral vision.

Someone really nice looking.

With a box of condoms.


Stiles likes to grocery shop at odd hours. He blames it on college life. The only free time he gets between classes, studying, and making time for Scott is when he’s meant to be sleeping but just can’t.

During these times, he also remembers that he actually has to eat at some point. Something that isn’t pop tarts and cup-o-noodles. Thus the grocery shopping at three a.m.

He’s just walking by aisle ten when he stops short. Because. Because. That guy is very attractive and he looks like he’s trying to will the toothpaste to death just with the power of his magnificent eyebrows.

So. Stiles does the only logical thing his sleep-deprived brain can think of. He walks down the same aisle. And, promptly, grabs the first thing he sees.

Which happens to be a box of XXL condoms.

And Hot Eyebrows Guy is looking right at him.

Stiles searches his brain for something not-stupid to say, but the only thing that comes out thanks to 30 hours of not sleeping is, “Think these are any good?”

Hot Eyebrows Guy just blinks at him for a solid ten seconds with said eyebrows raised to his hairline, looking between Stiles’ face and the box of condoms before replying, “Condoms?”

Stiles feels like a complete idiot. His one interaction with a really hot guy he doesn’t know and he already screwed it up. He can probably fix this. The only way he knows how. Flailing and a lot of talking. “Well, I mean. I wouldn’t really know, and like, a guy like you probably has more experience than I do. You know - in the bedroom, I mean. Especially with this size-” Oh my god, Stiles thinks. I just made it so much worse.

“I mean, not that I would know something like that about you.” Stiles tries to put the condoms back on the shelf, but just manages to make several other boxes fall to the floor. “Shit. I mean, for all I know, it could be a lot smaller than this-”

Hot Eyebrows Guy continues to stare at him in complete bewilderment. Only then does he realize what just came out of his mouth, “Wow, I really need to shut up now.”

Stiles decides to just avoid eye contact and pick up the mess he made.


Derek can only stare as the guy who just implied he thought he had a small penis awkwardly picks up the boxes of condoms that ended up on the floor thanks to his flailing.

He’s obviously trying to avoid eye contact.

Derek has never been more offended and fascinated in his entire life. He didn’t even know that was possible.

This guy is a mess. And, Derek might be a little in in love. What the hell.

He’s brought out of his thoughts by the Condom Guy awkwardly standing up with the box still in his hand, the rest put away on the shelf.

“So, I guess I should just,” he gestures behind him as he starts to walk away.

Derek scrambles for something to say, “You’re a disaster,” is what comes out. Damn it.

Condom Guy looks mildly offended, but also like he agrees with the statement.

Derek smiles a little helplessly, “Wanna date?”

The stranger does a double take at that and looks behind him as if Derek could be addressing anyone else in a grocery store at 3:15 a.m.

He looks completely surprised. Derek thinks it’s cute. He’ll die before he admits it out loud, though.

“Wait, seriously?” Condom Guy says.

Derek nods and digs in his pocket, pulling out his phone.


Stiles leaves the grocery store in a daze, having only bought a box of XXL condoms.

But, he does have Hot Eyebrow Guy’s (Derek’s) number in his phone and plans to have coffee in a few hours.

Later, Scott calls him an idiot for not actually getting anything edible. Stiles counts it as a win anyway. So does Derek.

The return of Twin Peaks is television at its most ambitious and creative. This is what happens when you give an artist the freedom they deserve.

David Lynch is once again proving he’s been unappreciated and unused in the past ten years and he should have had more opportunities in this time period to show his genius in what is a very popular time for art house films and television.

But here we are with the return of Twin Peaks after 25 years. Always rumoured over the years, but never did I imagine it would come to fruition. I am so thankful it’s here and creating memorable moments on television again and disturbing the comfortable.

We must appreciate this before it’s gone again. I don’t think we’ll see anything like it on television and I don’t think we’ll see anyone as ambitious and strict to his beliefs as David Lynch.

I love this man so much. He gives my mind new openings and constantly surprises me.

Isn’t that what we need with television and movies?

anonymous asked:

The request about Rika coming back was really interesting to me as a concept, so what about something more focused on Yoosung x MC if something like that happened? I really enjoy your writing and want to see what you would write for this! Thank you

sorry this took so long … I don’t have an excuse lmao I’m just lazy 


Before her reappearance, it still felt like her shadow loomed over MC. It was understandable that everyone continued to grieve and go through the process of acceptance. 

Everyone except Yoosung.

He held onto his extreme disdain towards V even after Rika’s return. It wasn’t a secret that when hearing of Rika’s supposed suicide, Yoosung fell apart. His grades fell, he became the ultimate underachiever but… she came back. Everything seemed to change.The man MC though they knew, did a complete 180. The version of Yoosung that MC only heard about, returned as if nothing had ever happened.

At first, Yoosung gloated until everyone became sick of it but even then, he didn’t care. HE WAS RIGHT… all along he had been right. His denial paid off in the end. 

On a brighter note, Yoosung no longer compared MC to Rika. 

However, he stopped talking to MC outside of the RFA app . Almost as if erasing them from his heart completely. They never expected to take Rika’s place but assumed they didn’t need to. MC fell in love with Yoosung with their whole heart. The version of him that everyone seemed to misunderstand, the version that suffered silently, the one that continued to ignore them.

They continued to love him. Even if the daily phone calls turned to bi-weekly texts. Even when MC asked him about his day and instead of answering, he asked where Rika was. Even when they knew… his heart no longer had enough room for them or what they could have been.


MC sat alone in the dark as they waited for the phone to ring. 

Their eyes never leaving the phone in their hands as they waited for the call that would never come.

anonymous asked:

I just drew something where Lance is being interviewed after they return to Earth and I thought of, 'Hey, what if Lance was Napoleon Dynamite?' and this happened- Interviewer: Lance, what was going through your head when got into the lion, Lance:..., Lance: I want to fly the goshdarn lion, gosh, what did you think was going through my head?

Originally posted by haidaspicciare

I NEED TO SEE THIS! 

Aliens are so used to humans wanting to pet the most deadliest creatures they find because PUPPER that they have prepared on every ship with a human crewmate. They have human sitting duties and at least 2 chaperones when going planet-side, just in case they get any ideas.

Then a crew gets a human for the first time and it’s everything like what the Human Care Manual says. The human is loud, but pleasant, always joke around with the crew and was tremendous during that Flokkut Raid on Sector 6. The human even brought a camera with it to take pictures on the ship (it’s bigger than most, downright obnoxious in shape to some of the crew, but the human is happy with it, and a happy human is a bonded human)

So then they go down to a planet, letting the human explore with his chaperones. After walking for a while the group stumbles on a herd of Dwetts, elks with fish eyes and flippers. The aliens sigh cause it was bound to see creatures sooner or later, and turn to give Acceptable Reason #6 from the manual, when the human disappeared! They freak out because how did the human leave??? Does it have invisibility??? That wasn’t part of the manual!! But they hear their human saying “guys, stop moving! You’re going to upset them!”

They look down to see the human lying on his stomach looking through his camera, taking pictures. They were shocked, but did as they were told and sat down. For hours they watched the human taking photos, being as quiet as still as possible. This couldn’t be the same human??

When the human was done, it got up, stretched, and headed back for the ship. The chaperones followed suit. When they got back the captain was surprised that they returned without a creature (even with 2 chaperones, he suspected that the human would win anyway) but was astonished to hear what had happened.

“You didn’t want to take one as these ‘pets’ for the ship??”

“No???? Why would I? They aren’t domesticated, they need space to live which the ship wouldn’t supply.”

“But aren’t they cute in human terms?”

“I mean, I would say more interesting than cute. But seriously, how would we take care of it? How to feed it, groom it, keep away from all the sensitive equipment? It would be dangerous for us and it if we take one from the wild. You really want one that badly?”

“Wha- No! It’s just…you seemed to like them?”

“I mean yeah, it’s a new animal species, and I did take pictures, but not as long as I hoped for. Honestly you have to look at the ecosystem here before getting any animals on board.”

The captain immediately notified the Human Care Committee that their section on animal bonding does not apply to human subclass professional wildlife photographer

fave beauty and the beast (2017) things

  • the prince’s fabulous make up
  • “if he could earn their love in return”
  • belle’s blue dress
  • “hmm… ‘je ne sais quoi’?” - “I don’t know what that means”
  • even the freaking ducks are singing
  • “it’s never gonna happen ladies”
  • gaston asking belle if she’s busy and belle saying “no”
  • otp gaston x mirrors
  • belle’s disgusted face when gaston gestures from his lower body to her when saying she should only be concerned with her own children
  • “no one can change… that much”
  • “madame gaston, his little wife, uGH
  • the whole scene with maurice in the castle
  • m a u r i c e
  • philippe, everyone’s hero
  • belle smashing lumière with a stool
  • “the east wing, or as I like to call it, the only wing
  • ‘G A S T O N’
  • gaston lifting both lefou and a lady onto his shoulders
  • “I’ve been told I’m clingy, but I really don’t get it”
  • “he’ll blame me!” - “yes I will make sure of it”
  • “maestro, play quietly please” - “oh quietly, sotto voce, of course. are there any other tasteless demands you wish to make upon my artistry”
  • be. our. guest. be our guest put our service to the test
  • maurice trying to remember the way to the castle
  • “you really wanna marry into this family?”
  • “gaston, stop it. breathe. think happy thoughts. go back to the war! blood… explosions… countless widows…”
  • the nose boop
  • luke evans’ acting in that scene… hilariously creepy
  • “romeo and juliette fucking sucks here’s my huge library full of much better things to read” basically
  • beast is making jokes now
  • beast knocking out belle with his huge ass snowball like chill man
  • beast walking around the castle grounds with philippe and talking to him
  • belle watching that from the window and looking beautiful as hell like wow I knew I was gay but that was a solid reminder
  • “no? too touristy?”
  • the way lefou says maurice’s name and smiles when seeing he’s alive
  • waiting heeere. fooor. eee.ver.mooooore
  • luke evans singing
  • “there’s a beast running wild there’s no question, but I fear the wrong monster’s released”
  • stanley rocking that dress and owning it that’s my boy
  • lefou teaming up with mrs potts
  • “I am. not. a beast.”
  • L E F O U 
  • “turn back into a clock, turn back into a clock”
  • human plumette is so beautiful I wanted to cry
  • “how would you feel about growing a beard”
  • rawr
Bare // Jughead Jones Smut

Summary: Heading to Pops after the reoccurring verbal fight between your sibling and Dad, your boyfriend notices how tired you look. Admitting the fighting he takes you to his favourite place to wait for to calm down. Things get heated quick between Jughead and you.

Characters: Jughead x reader, Hermione Lodge, and Archie Andrews (mentioned)

Words: 1702

Disclaimer: I do not own Riverdale or the characters. I also want to clarify, in the tv series Jughead is NOT asexual and this is based on the series not the comics.

Warnings: Fluff, mention of fighting, and smut

Author: Caitsy

Tagging: At the bottom

A/N Someone posted wanting Jughead smut because there isn’t. Under the forever tags I’m adding them to a Riverdale taglist. If you want off please let us know.

Master List

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ASK US A QUESTION LIST

Originally posted by fyeahriverdale

The night was cold, the type of cold that seeped through the thickest of jackets and clung for hours. The type that made you think that you would die from hypothermia at any point despite compelling evidence that it wasn’t possible. You were trying to get away from the fighting between your sibling and father.

Lately it seemed that the sounds in the house were the screaming match that went down every night when you tried to sleep. You would sneak out half an hour into the fight and you always walked yourself to Pop’s for a milkshake. It was getting around that your home life was terrible.

“I’ll have a strawberry milkshake this time.” You mumbled digging into your pocket for change.

“It’s on the house.” Mrs. Lodge smiled seeing the pain and fatigue clinging on your features.

Normally you would argue that but as of lately you didn’t have the energy to do anything so you nodded before sitting down in a booth. It was late so you were one of the very few people sitting in the diner. You barely noticed the person that sat down in the booth until they spoke.

“Y/N.”

You looked up to see your boyfriend looking at you concerned, taking in the inky colours underneath your eyes. It wasn’t hard to see that sleep had evaded you for the last little while. It was concerning for Jughead.

“Hey.” You smiled placing your hands back into your lap while Jughead ran his eyes across your features, “Something wrong Jug?”

“Why are you here so late?”

“Can’t sleep-“

“The truth.” Jughead firmly said.

“I haven’t been sleeping.” You admitted, “I can’t fall asleep in a house where screaming takes place every night. There’s no peace at all.”

Jughead’s heart broke when the tears gathered as your voice broke in synch with his heart. You were normally one of the strongest girls he had ever known. When you learnt about his home situation you had fought him to tell the Andrews, despite Fred being a main reason why Jughead didn’t have a home anymore.

“Oh.” Jughead breathed sliding into your side of the booth instead. He wrapped his long arms around your shaking frame, leaning his chin on the top of your head, “It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled, “Why are you out so late Jug?”

“Couldn’t write in the house. I’m so used to writing with you by my side or in here. I have words racing in my head but I couldn’t write with Archie playing his songs. He’s an amazing singer but those songs aren’t putting me in the writing mood.”

You chuckled as Jughead pressed a kiss to the top of your head. You were still wired so Jughead gripped your hand and tugged you out of the diner. The milkshake forgotten and if Hermione Lodge was being truthful, she hadn’t started making it when Jughead showed up.


You knew that he could see that you wouldn’t be able to sleep for awhile so he did something he knew you would like. The Twilight Drive-In was still in the process of being demolished but the shack that Jughead had slept in still stood.

“Come on.”

“Aren’t we trespassing?” You mumbled walking in while Jughead made sure the coast was clear.

“Probably.” He shrugged, “I know you though.”

You chuckled as the two of you dropped to the bed in silence. Jughead was different when it was just the two of you and not around your peers. You each had an uncanny distaste for public displays of affection to the disappointment of Kevin.

“Do you remember when I invited you here for our first date?” Jughead asked putting his arm around your shoulders.

“Of course I do!” You laughed.

“Movies, and when the second movie started I couldn’t help myself from kissing you.” Jughead whispered leaning his forehead against yours. The atmosphere got charged when he pressed his lips against yours.

“I remember you pulled back and I crashed mine against yours.” You breathed.

“I don’t…” Jughead trailed off before, “Can you refresh my memory?”

Without another word you pushed your body onto his lap and pushed his hat off his head. Your lips moved against each other passionately as you gasped when Jug’s hand came to rest of your thigh.

Jughead pulled away to trail his lips down your neck to suck on your collarbone. You released a breathy moan as you clenched his hair in your hands, arching into his chest. You took pride in knowing you had turned him on.

“Y/N…” Jughead breathed as you rubbed yourself on his hard on. He moaned as his head rested on your chest before gripping your hips in a bruising hold.

He pressed his hands on your hips down as he slowly dragged you up and down his lap. You hissed when your clit dragged across the zipper of his black jeans. He let go to push his jacket and sweater off his arms before returning his hands back to your hips.

You grinded against him harder both of you hissing and panting as you leaned down. You ran your lips slowly up his jaw, teasingly leaving small bites. You bit him at the same time he groaned lowly.

“I also remember what happened a few dates after that” you said as a smirk crossed your face as you began to speed up.

“You talking about the one that Archie walked in on?” Jughead smirked dragging his hands up under your shirt and pulling it off and onto the floor within seconds.

“More like the one after that.” You breathed slowly dragging his shirt up his body, “The one where we-“

You gasped when you turned flipped onto your back with Jughead hovering above you with one hand trailing fire down your chest to the button of your jeans. He slowly kissed the underside of your jaw while his fingers carefully and awkwardly undid the button and pulled back to remove your jeans.

“I’ll never get out of this.” Jughead whispered, his eyes igniting the fire in you to higher temperatures.

“Jug…please.” You whispered pulled him back down onto your body. The start had been intense but it slowed down, possibly because of the awkwardness, to wear you caressed each others skin.

You made quick work of Jughead’s black jeans by shoving them off by your feet along with his boxers. You moaned taking in his size despite it not being the first time you had seen each other naked.

“You’re wearing too many clothes. I’d prefer the soft, supple skin.”

With shaking fingers Jughead couldn’t entirely release your bra clasps with fluid movements but that was okay. With an apology breathed into the crook of your neck you switched positions with Jughead, now you straddled his thighs as you swiftly removed your underwear. Jughead had taken the time to stroke himself.

You took your tall and lean boyfriend splayed out on the cot with his green eyes darkened with desire and his tongue running over his swollen lips. Your heated gaze raked over his form from his ruffled raven hair going everywhere both from his hat and your fingers.

You didn’t even notice that his free hand had moved to the apex of your thighs. It never failed to amaze you how his touch could make you nearly collapse. You felt more than saw him move to lean against the wall and drag you up. In unison Jughead and you hissed as you sank down on him.

Jughead had this thing where he wouldn’t let either of you move as he let the feeling overpower him. A beat later he had you bouncing using his power as you felt boneless before you met him thrust for thrust. Swivelling your hips as you sank down you had Jughead gasping.

“Oh god.” You breathed squeezing your eyes closed as Jughead’s thumb pressed into your clit, “Holy sh-“

“I’m c-lose.” Jughead exclaimed tugging you down with his other hand. You ground your hips gripping his hair tightly. With a harsh brush against your clit you fell into your climax

Jughead got off on the way you came. You’re skin would colour into the most beautiful pink he had ever seen. Your toes and fingers would curl together while your nose crinkled at the strongest crest. Your hair would be a halo around your head and his favourite part was when his name fell from your lips like a raindrop from a flower petal.

Breathing was difficult as you both came down from your highs shaking from the intense love-making. Jughead dragged you down to lay down but the chill in the room caused goosebumps to raise on your body.

“We should probably go home.” Jughead breathed, “Getting caught by the cops in here wouldn’t be fun.”

“Yeah.” You yawned, “Do you want to stay over at my place?”

“What about your-“

“You know my parents love you. They’re fine with you staying if the door isn’t closed all the way.” You whispered.

In a comfortable silence you dressed quickly, only this time Jughead’s sweater was wrapped around you. In typical fashion it was much too big on you but in your rush to get out of your house you had grabbed the thinnest sweater you had by accident. Jug’s hat was back on his head and his arm was around your shoulder.

Jughead had a lot of shades to himself where he was a novelist, student, best friend and boyfriend. He was sarcastic and intelligent with a certain way of words. He was cool and collected with a witty remark to anything but he was different behind closed doors. Sex with Jughead wasn’t the smooth sailing in tv shows and movies but instead it was true with awkwardness that dissipated when you got more and more well versed with each others bodies.

“I love you.” Jughead whispered into your hair when you were asleep in his arms in the safety of your room. He didn’t say it often but he showed it a lot. Jughead loved you even if he didn’t say the words and you returned the same feelings.

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Nursemaid

(Jimin’s crush comes over to his house to help him out after he suffers an injury that leaves him with limited use of both hands.)

Warnings: 6000+ words of smut, Jimin POV, I’ll let you guess what kind of smut takes place


“I can’t believe you managed to injure both of your hands on the same day.” Hoseok’s girlfriend, Sophie, stifled a laugh while she said it. “I can’t tell if you are dumb or just unlucky.”

 Jimin sighed.  He had been stupid and drunk when he and Jungkook went out into the street to play with fireworks.  One went off too close to his hand, burning his right palm requiring a trip to the emergency room where his injury was cleaned and bandaged.  The doctor gave him a lecture about drunk people and explosives and how fortunate he was not to have blasted off his fingers.            

While exiting the hospital, Jimin immediately tripped over the curb and landed with his full weight onto his left hand resulting in a small fracture and return trip to the emergency room to get a splint to immobilize his other hand.   Now, every time Jimin saw someone, he had to suffer the embarrassment of explaining what happened. People had a hard time not laughing when they heard how he managed to get hurt twice in one day.

 “Does it hurt much?” you asked him.

“Not really. As long as I don’t bump into anything or use my fingers too much, it’s okay.” At least you seemed to be genuinely concerned about his well-being. That’s one of the reasons Jimin liked you, you always seemed caring and sincere.  The other main reason he liked you was because he thought you were incredibly hot.  There were plenty of nights Jimin stayed up fantasizing about what it would feel like to be with you.  He wanted to ask you out, but had been waiting until there was some indication that you were even the slightest bit interested in him.  He was starting to think that maybe he had a chance with you, but he felt neutered with his injuries, unable to do things like casually touch you and see how you would respond to his advances.  Jimin resolved to make a move as soon as he had full use of his hands again.

Keep reading

FUTURE HEARTS | PT.6 [M]

pt1 | pt2 | pt3 | pt4 | pt5 | pt6 | (6/?)

pairing: jimin x reader, jungkook x reader

genre: smut, angst / punk!jikook

word count: 17,335

note: inspired by the anime/manga “Nana” / music playlist

description: It was everything, from his tattoos, to his touches, to the way sweat rolled down his neck as he strummed into his guitar on stage; everything about him completely enthralled you. So why are you now, two and a half years later, on a train to Seoul, telling a complete stranger the recollection of how you became fated to forever have scars on all of your future hearts due to the happiness, but most of all the pain, that came along with falling in love with Jeon Jungkook.

cr.


The slight tremble in Jimin’s fingertips developed into a full-blown tremor as he closed the door to his studio, effectively leaving you behind — but it wasn’t that simple. It wasn’t that simple because he wasn’t just leaving you behind. He was leaving you behind with a guy that you were completely in love with… Which kind of blowed considering he was starting to fall for you himself.

The music from the party was reverberating inside of his chest and he knew that his ears should be ringing with anger, but instead he just felt numb. It was like he couldn’t hear anything; no music, no crowd, nothing. It was all one giant blur that didn’t seem to make sense to him, and all because his mind was screaming that nothing else mattered right now — nothing except for you.

Jimin knew very well what leaving you in that room with Jungkook meant. It meant every single feeling that the two of you had ever had for each other would inevitably rekindle, and compared to what Jimin had with you, even if he did consider it one of most amazing stints of time of his entire life, it didn’t hold a candle to what you and Jungkook had, and probably always would have.

Keep reading

Dating Stiles Stilinski Would Include

warnings: mentions of sex

- you and stiles are neighbors, but he didn’t really notice you much.

- that is until you hit a puberty stage in the seventh grade, and suddenly he was tripping over his feet crossing the street to your house. you were shocked when he asked if you wanted to ride bikes with him.

- but you said yes anyways cuz how could you turn down the adorable little spazz. 

 - you and Stiles became best friends easily in the one day, and overtime you him and Scott were a tight little group.

- scott asked you to your first dance in eighth grade, yes, scott. You’d looked between him and Stiles, and when the buzz cut boy said nothing, you said yes to scott

- no, Scott did not have a crush on you, nor you him, but you had a great time that night. though when a slow song came on, Scott made an excuse for punch and asked if you’d rather dance with stiles

- Stiles barely knew how to dance to slow songs, but you taught him. holding your arms around his neck, and his at your waist comfortably. and at one point you’d laid your head on his chest and made him promise you’d be best friends forever. he did without hesitation.

- in freshman year, it was painfully obvious that he was head over heels for Lydia Martin

- (or so you thought. that’s just what stiles wanted you to think)

- but your friendship continued nonetheless, and your growing feelings for the boy continued as well.

- the both of you always made witty remarks. as well as being on the same level of sarcasm. so the banter was great

- except to Scott, who was constantly worn out by it

- seriously. he always took out his inhaler whenever you two got into it

- you’d really pushed yourself to look for nice for homecoming that year.  You’d forced Scott to take you to the mall and critique each and every dress you tried on

- he told you nervously that you looked hot in the one you’d ended up picking, and you gave him finger guns

- STILES ASKED YOU TO DANCE

- you went with Scott and Stiles to the woods that fateful night, in hopes of seeing a severed body

- you and Stiles figured out together that Scott was a werewolf

- when he went to confront Scott about it, he made you stay at his house.  It turned into a nasty argument, which ended with him yelling that he wasn’t letting you get hurt in the process

- you made up easily.  It was you and Stiles.  Of course you did

- but you were with Scott and Stiles when Scott was chained up to the radiator, so that he wouldn’t go crazy on the full moon.

- you sat with Stiles in the hallway, both of you trying not to cry to the sound of Scott’s audible agony.  You saw your freckled friend close his eyes tight, and leaned your head onto his shoulder.  The action provided more comfort than you’d ever know

- the winter formal was a colossal disaster.  Scott snuck in, Stiles was with Lydia the whole night, Jackson was a jerk, you were left alone the entire night, and Lydia got attacked by Peter.

- you did comfort Stiles a little bit later that night in the hospital

- and you beat the shit out of Peter Hale with a baseball bat.  Which resulted in you getting scratched deep on your arm.  Scott Stiles and Allison took you to the hospital the second that Peter’s throat was slashed.  Scott taking Stiles’ keys and starting the Jeep, Allison rushing into the passenger’s seat.  Stiles was holding your nearly unconscious body in the backseat, letting you lay across his lap.  You didn’t really comprehend how hard he was crying

- you didn’t know that he slept in the waiting room for two nights in a row while you were under strict ‘family only’ visiting hours

- but he ran into the room the second Melissa allowed it.  You cried upon seeing him, weakly holding your arms out for him to hug you.  Your pain washing away as soon as he held you in his arms.

- you had to stay in one more night, and Stiles stayed again much to your protests, and he pulled up a folding chair in the room.  Sitting next to your bed and laying his head on the sheets.  He accidentally fell asleep before you did, so you spent half an hour just running your fingers over his buzz cut and thinking about the life you had.

- but don’t worry, the cut wasn’t deep enough to turn you into anything

- you and Stiles became messengers for Scott and Allison.  A tiring, yet sometimes fun job

- Stiles telling you all of his suspicions about Allison’s grandfather, Gerard

- as well as complaining about how cocky Jackson had become

- standing up for Stiles (and Scott when Jackson dared threaten a werewolf) whenever the little shit poked fun at him.

- he stood up for you too, because Jackson… well he was just a dick

- you became closer with Allison and Lydia, but your friendship with Stiles never faltered

- when Stiles found out that Matt was stalking both you and Allison, he flipped shit, and you were crying because you didn’t want him to know.  (because you knew he’d freak out

- Stiles didn’t tell you he punched Matt the next day

- you and Stiles laughed for a long time about how ironic it was that Jackson was the kanima.  I mean, come on, a lizard? Of course it was him.  Jackson’s a fucking snake.

- it got unfunny real fast at Lydia’s birthday party

- you had refused to drink, knowing someone had to have spiked it.  So you saw Stiles lose his mind in the middle of the party, and dragged him outside.  He kept mumbling on about disappointing his father, which made you cry.

- you and Stiles accidentally passed out spooning on Lydia’s couch that night

- the night at the train station still freaks you out.  First Matt tried to get you to join him, and when you’d told him to fuck off, he had Jackson the kanima paralyze you.  Your limp body was tied to a chair for the entire night, and you had to watch him pull a gun on Stiles, and shoot Scott.  

- you later caught Gerard drowning him when you’d been heading home.  You’d grabbed Stiles’ hand so fast, unsure of what to do.  Yes, the boy needed to be punished, you surely didn’t want him to have a happily every after… but he was so afraid and in so much pain.

- you Stiles and Scott picked a lot of classes together over the summer

- Stiles began to grow his hair out, which you supported more the longer it got

- also had a summer road trip to San Diego for a weekend.  Big back to school shopping spree

- you were nervous going back to school after the shitty way last year ended, but Stiles constantly assured you that it would all be okay

- you complained to him constantly about the awkwardness of being friends with both Scott and Allison, and how you barely mentioned one around the other.   

- “but I’m your best friend, right?” to which you’d eagerly nodded to

- groaning the second Scott told you about the alpha pack.

- “can’t i catch a break!?”

- you and Stiles catching a quick two second flicker in Scott’s eyes, shifting from brown to yellow, to red, then back to yellow.  You exchanged a glance that said you’d talk about it after fighting the alpha pack.

- you getting closer with Isaac, and sitting with him on the bus ride to the motel
(you didn’t know Stiles was pestering Scott as to why you’d choose to sit next to a boy who wore scarves that looked like scarves that you would buy.  But Scott was in too much pain to care about his friend’s love life problems)

- you had known all along Lydia and Allison were trailing the bus, because Lydia was snap chatting you about how Allison was so still in love with Scott.  While you were snap chatting her about your Stiles problems

- when you stopped at a rest stop so Allison could stitch up Scott, you were freaking out outside the bathroom, but Lydia and Isaac had no idea how to comfort you

- Stiles had rushed over and held you in his arms, cradling your head against his chest and cooing softly to you.

- “you’re okay, and you know Scott will be okay, don’t worry too much then others will wonder what’s going on in there” 

- after that, Isaac sat with Scott the rest of the bus ride to the motel, and you sat with Stiles

- most of the night, Stiles made you stay in his and Scott’s motel room because weird things were happening.  He’d told you to stay in there after Ethan tried to cut open his stomach with a saw

- “Stiles you know I can handle myself fine-”

- “I know you can, I do, but this is different, they have no idea what’s going on either so I need you to just stay in here, and stay safe

- you’d listened, and ended up falling asleep on the bed waiting for someone to return

- you woke up when the door opened, a soaking Scott and exhausted Stiles dragging in.  Stiles asked if you were staying with them instead of the girls tonight, and you’d nodded limply.

- after Scott got in the shower, Stiles collapsed onto the mattress next to you, mumbling ‘we’re sharing a bed by the way’ and you’d only nodded

- you restrained from screaming when he told you what had happened that resulted in Scott being drenched in gasoline.  The thought of Stiles… him being gone… it killed you.  But you didn’t say anything, just snuggled up against him and fell asleep in his arms.  It meant more than words could’ve said

- you sat with him on the bus the next morning too.  He didn’t wake you up when you left, just carried your sleeping body out to the bus and gave you his flannel to use as a blanket

- you woke up next to him relatively happy upon finding the clothing on you and your head on his shoulder, his head atop yours as he played on his phone

- you were taken with Melissa Chris and Noah, because you’d figured out that Jennifer was the darach, and what her next move was.  You were on your way to warn Stiles when she’d caught you

- you were trapped in the nemeton, but you still just had this feeling in you that Scott became an alpha.  You’d later learn that it was because in a way, without being a werewolf, you were his beta

- when Stiles got you and his father back, the group hug between you three was so tight you cried harder

- he called you the second he started getting night terrors

- and soon Noah began to just come pick you up and bring to the house in the middle of the night because you were the only one who could get him to stop screaming

shh Stiles, it’s not real I promise” you laid down next to him, pulling the covers over both of you. When Stiles shakily nodded, laying down with you, Noah left the room.

“It’s not real” He’d repeat over and over.

- you always stayed on your respective sides of the bed

- you helped Allison get her stability back in the woods, and helped Stiles get his ability to read back

- it took you stepping on a bear trap for it to happen, but hey! he did it!

- Stiles told you first about his dementia

- you were as calm as possible, hugging him and telling him it’d be okay, not shedding a tear

- you went straight to Scott’s and screamed and cried and beat up his chest with your fists in anger, eventually falling to the ground in defeat and exhaustion

- you felt as numb as Stiles looked

- you went with him and Scott to the hospital for the MRI, the three of you group hugging when it was all over

- Trying not to cry.  A lot those days.  Mostly not in front of Stiles, so you ended up crashing on the McCall living room couch and taking over Allison’s bed.

Maybe you should go talk to Stiles, I think you guys need some closure with each other”

“Scotty, I love you, but that would just end with me telling him I love him and there’s enough shit already”

and

“Stiles, you can’t just sit next to her anymore.  You gotta tell her it’s all going to be okay.  You’re little game of ‘we don’t need words’ can’t last forever”

“Scotty, I love you, but that would just end with me telling her I love her and there’s enough shit already”

- You eventually broke.  Like a twig actually.  You’d been sitting on his bed, messing around on your phone when he told you that he was going to admit himself to Eichen.

Are you insane? Did you actually lose your mind?!”

“y/n… maybe they can help…”

“Why can’t we help?!”

“Professional help y/n”

- You cried a lot, too much, you got tears and makeup all over his favorite flannel.  But he didn’t care, he was just glad you finally showed some emotion

- You went with him Scott and Noah to the hospital.  You stood silently with them as he checked in, holding his hand so tight you wondered if he was in any pain.  But he didn’t show any

- You didn’t let go until he hugged Scott and his father goodbye.  Noah excused himself to go ‘start the car’ and Scott ‘offered to help’

(they shipped you two hard)

- Stiles giving you the biggest bear hug and lifting you off the ground.

Just promise not to die in here, this place reeks of depression and I’m not even a werewolf” 

“I promise.  I’m coming back okay?”

- holding his face between your hands and wiping away the tears (he was trying not to let show) with your thumbs

I’m holding you to that promise”

- two days later not being able to take it anymore.  Lydia had offered a million times to conceal the bags under your eyes, and Allison offered a million times to take you shopping.  Kira even invited you over for a sleepover.

- Scott being the only one who wasn’t pushing you to do anything.  

- in fact he was the one who drove you to Eichen to give Stiles his pillow

I’m sorry ma’am, he can’t have visitors yet-”

“Tough shit”

- Scott being surprised when you pushed past the nurse and waltzed towards Stiles’ room because you were usually so calm and collected in public, and never disrespectful towards your elders

- Swiping a key card off of a passing orderly, and pretty much sneaking into Stiles’ little chamber that was hardly an actual warm

- Your heart broke when you looked at him.  His eyes were dark, there were pink bags under them, and his skin was much paler than usual

y/n? Scott? How’d you guys even get in?”

- being tugged into a hug that made you feel like home wasn’t a place anymore

- he smiled when you showed him that you’d brought his pillow

Stiles… what did they do to you?”

- your reunion was short lasted, and you were being dragged out by a male nurse named Brunski

Wait- y/n-!”

“Stiles!”

“I’m gonna get out soon!”

- hearing him yell those same words over and over as Brunski kicked you and Scott out of the building

- wearing Stiles’ lacrosse hoodie for the next few days, waiting for him to come back

- When Noah picked him up, he brought him straight to your house, again, shattering your heart at his clearly unstable persona

- He told you first that he’d known Void had taken over

- You both sat on your bed for a long time, criss cross in the middle of the mattress just talking over everything that happened

- He was crying by the time he got to the part about Void making him have sex with Malia (which he never really knew if it was Void..or him…) and kill his room mate Oliver

I’m a killer I’m a killer y/n I belong there I’m a psycho”

“No.. no Stiles that’s not you, that’s the demon it’s not you”

- He broke down a few times that day, and you had him lay his head in your lap so you could softly run your hands through his hair.  He fell asleep mumbling something about voices

- You called the pack quickly and had them come over

- BIG pack meeting (while Stiles was asleep in your room) about what you were going to do

y/n what if he takes over and you- or or- or anyone- what if someone gets hurt?”

“You’re not going to hurt me Stiles”

- having that conversation a lot

- in school just grabbing onto his hand when he’d get quiet, in the halls at lunch, in class

- whenever you were separated, texting him constantly

you: how do you feel?
Stiles: idk lonely
you: you’re in bio right?
stiles: yeah
you: I’m on my way over tell the teach you’re goin to the bathroom

- this happened many many times in a single day

- seriously his teacher began to ask if he had some bladder infection

- the day Stiles Void was in Derek’s loft was a hard day for you.  Watching Chris pull a gun on the boy made you scream, but before you could go up to the Man, Derek had pinned your arms behind your back

- it hurt more seeing Void smirk upon the action

oh your little spazz is so pissed right now.  he’s quite angry with you Derek” The demon chuckled louder when everyone exchanged confused glances.  “Well, you’re hurting y/n”

- you officially became afraid of Void when Allison had attempted to taser him, and it had no effect on him.

- you hid behind Scott while he was tied to the chair

“he’s so upset y/n, he’s upset that he’s the one scaring you”

- you moved further behind Scott, gripping onto the Alpha’s arm and burying your face into his back

oh this is new… jealousy.  he’s not a happy camper”

- you silently thanked Melissa when she put a thick duct tape over his mouth

- watching him pull foot after foot of rope from his throat horrified you in a way that will haunt your nightmares for many years to come

it’s me guys, I swear it’s me”

- beating Scott to it, and both you and Stiles crashing onto the ground in a hug.  You cried into his neck, your body crushing his chest.  His arms wound around you and he cried too

- you stuck next to him in the McCall living room while everyone else came up with the plan to get Lydia back from Void

you’re okay now?”

- he’d responded by putting his head on your shoulder, and taking your hand in his

I’m here to save my best friend”

“And I’m here to save mine”

- Scott had looked at you, prompting you to say what everyone (minus Stiles) knew you were here for (to save the boy you loved) but you’d only nodded, too afraid in the moment to say anything

- you’d screamed, nearly louder than Lydia upon seeing an Oni pierce a blade through your Argent friend

- Stiles had grabbed onto you so fast, holding your face against his chest as you were still screaming, body convulsing against his.

- he ended up having to pick you up off the ground, while Scott was with Allison.  He carried you to the jeep, and you sat in silence with him in the backseat

- Chris took you both with him, Scott, Isaac, and Lydia to the police station to *cough* explain the death of Allison Argent

- Noah let you stay silent, seeing how much deeper it was  effecting you

- the man took you with him and Stiles home for the night

- you barely slept, you just laid in bed across from Stiles, who was holding both your hands between his

It’s my fault, I did it to her-”

“Stop, you didn’t, you know you didn’t”

- you were already out of tears, the entire void experience had drained you, so you were mostly in silence.  But here and there Stiles would say something to you

Do you hate me?”

“Of course not”

- he asked this a few more times that night, until eventually you leaned up, and kissed his cheek, then buried your face into his shirt, whispering a soft ‘no’ before finally falling asleep

- you were pissed when he held the sword to his chest, the stupid boy thinking that it would help everybody

Stiles don’t, Stiles don’t please, please don’t, drop it Stiles please”

- when he’d dropped it, you’d wrapped both arms around his waist, and didn’t release the entire night

- you freaked when he passed out after void turned to dust

- but when he woke up, you were more relieved than you’d ever been before

- the both of you went together to get clothes for Allison’s funeral

Is this one okay?” you would ask softly

“I think it’s beautiful”

“Stiles you said that about the last four”

- your hand was wrapped in his throughout the entire ceremony

- and after, you him Scott Lydia and Kira went to the McCall house, just wanting to grieve together

- it took you a few weeks to find actual peace, but Stiles was there with you through all of it

- but the day Stiles came to your doorstep an eager and boyish grin on his face as he told you Malia Tate (a girl who’d quickly become your friend) was his girlfriend, you’d lied to him for the first time

good for you Stiles, I’m glad you found someone who made you happy”

while on the inside it was more like…

“that’s great Stiles, not like I had my fucking heart on my fucking sleeve for you.  glad that you found someone who’s better than me”

- but he was smiling so happily, you couldn’t tell him the truth

- Scott chewed you out for lying, Kira chewed you out for not telling Stiles you loved him, and Lydia chewed you out for not jumping Stiles’ bones when you’d had the chance

- and every time there was some sort of opportunity for you to say something to Stiles, Scott would give you a look, or Lydia would kick you under the table, or Kira would cough.  Sometimes all three

- but you were somewhat friends with Malia.  and you were friends with Stiles.  So you let them have their relationship, and you slowly grew away from Stiles

- you became closer with Liam, a new beta, and his friend Mason

- you loved Mason

Scott, Scott who’s that kid she’s talking to? Since when did she go for freshmen?”

“Stiles, he’s gay, and you have a girlfriend”

- you didn’t know this, but every time Scott reminded Stiles of his girlfriend, he did it bitterly.  

Is uh… is Stiles and Malia going okay?”

I dunno why don’t you ask”

- Scott became a very bitter person when either of you brought up the other.  But Lydia would back him up with something snarky

- when in Mexico, watching Stiles let Malia dance dirty with him, went right on the list of things that would haunt your dreams.  Which sucked, seeing that being stalked, attacked, and your best friend being murdered was on the same list

- you ended up getting yourself strapped to an electric chair, and Scott took most of the blows, but you got one for mouthing off to the Calevera’s henchman

- Stiles had screamed your name when you were released, your spasming body falling to the ground.  But Lydia had gotten to you first, and Stiles just stood and watched as she held you and asked if you were alright repeatedly

I-I-I-I’ll b-b-be al-alright” 

- when the spasming ended, she helped you up, and Stiles couldn’t tear his eyes off you

- he’d never been jealous of Lydia before, but her arm around your waist as she walked you back out to the jeep seemed threatening to him

- you sat in the backseat on the ride home (the day was interesting… a young Derek being in the backseat and weird bone men attacking Kira and Malia.  Not to mention the Calevera’s torturing you) Scott and Kira were on his bike following the Jeep.  Malia in  your  the passengers- seat.  And you were wedged between the younger version of Derek Hale, and Lydia on your other side

- young Derek was hitting on you, and you just let it happen.  What? you liked the way Stiles would glare at the teen through the rear view mirror

- you’d gone with Scott Malia and Peter to the school for the Hale loft, and ended up getting attacked by Berserkers

- Stiles came to pick you guys up, and yelled at you for going.  you’d stayed silent, not wanting to break the friendship you were painfully keeping up.

- Scott took you home on the motor bike, and when he dropped you off he asked you how much it was hurting you before you went to the door

I don’t know what you’re talking about”

“I know when you lie, y/n”

“Then it seems to me you knew the answer when you asked the question”

- and when he heard your voice crack before you walked away, he did know the answer.  more certain this time anyways

- you went to Lydia’s party, before it was a party anyways, and the blonde freshman lacrosse player, was hitting on you all.  night.  At one point he had himself leaning against you, both arms caging you against the wall.

Alright, really, you’re nice, but you’re too young for me and I’m not interested-”

“Come on babe, age is just a numb-”

“She said she wasn’t interested”

- your has had widened impossibly further when Stiles had pried the boy off of you 

go screw your actual girlfriend Stilinski” was all the boy said

- but thankfully he had left after that

- you’d exchanged a glance with Stiles, and he’d asked quietly if you were alright.  You nodded, thanked him, then excused yourself to find Lydia

- you told Lydia everything that happened in the last twenty minutes

- the entire pack spent the night at the lake house, even Liam did, spending most of the time talking with Scott about what being a werewolf meant

- the same blonde boy, Garret, tried to kill you a week later, to which you’d hit him over the head a few times with a bat before sprinting through the almost empty school, finding Scott, who told you the other girl, Violet had tried to kill him for being a werewolf

I’m on the deadpool”

- the realization meant you weren’t as human as you thought.  you’d said this at the pack meeting, and for some reason, your eyes were locked with Stiles’.  before Malia pulled his attention back to her

- so you went from researching with Stiles, to researching with Lydia

- you found out that you were a witch.  not the broomstick kind, but the kind with telekinesis.  You figured that the bite triggered it in you, but never really proved that theory

- so you did some training with Liam, both of you learning about your powers together since he was still trying to get the hang of the werewolf thing

- but you still missed Stiles miserably, and Lydia was the one who seemed to notice the most

y/n i love you, but you’re miserable.  All the time”

- and she was right

- so one night, on a total whim at 10 pm, you drove yourself over the Stilinski house hold to talk to Stiles.  Maybe tell him your true feelings, or just talk, because he had to notice the change in your relationship, right?

- but fate was against you that night.  your car got a flat tire, which lead to Kate kidnapping you and dragging your sorry lover ass to Mexico

- Stiles lost his freaking mind

- when the pack (+ a shady ass Peter) came to get you, Scott was long turned into a berserker

- and when he broke free from the curse, Peter revealed his true intentions, and knocked you out with one blow

- you woke up to a lot of movement, and barely opened your eyes to see Stiles carrying you, yelling that you were going to be okay over and over again

- you just smiled a little bit, and leaned into him as he brought you to the jeep

- he let you sit in the passenger’s seat on the ride home

- Lydia hugged you tight, and screamed at you for having a death wish

- you her Malia and Kira had a sleepover, where you might have had some drinks and maybe proclaimed your love for Stiles

- but Malia was actually cool with it

- you forgot all about it the next day

- that summer, all of you went to San Diego together, and promised each other to make it a tradition

- senior year was gonna be bad, and it was all Stiles would talk about.

I mean Theo? he seemed really shady don’t you think y/n? Don’t you think?”

“no, I think you mean to say he seemed dreamy

- you didn’t know how much more shady that made Theo seem to Stiles

- you opened up with him more though.  your friendship was still mending back together, but at least he no longer ignored you

- Theo made his advances on you, and when he asked oyu out, you’d happily said yes

- when you told Stiles, he made a face

what? I thought it was sweet”

“well I think he has other plans.  why else would he ask you out?”

- Stiles immediately realized his mistake

wow Stiles.  so what reason would a guy ask me out if he wasn’t trying to use me?”

- there were tears in your eyes as you stormed out of the house, ignoring Stiles as he yelled after you

- you went on your date with Theo, and he was a real gentleman

- you made big deals about kissing in front of Stiles

he reeks of jealousy”

“that’s not jealousy Theo, that’s just anger.  and that’s what we’re going for”

- after two weeks of this, you were trapped in your room on a school night, reading up on chimeras when there was a knock on your front door.  you didn’t expect Stiles to be standing there

we need to talk”

“if this is about Theo, then go home Stiles because-”

“I don’t care about Theo, I did something bad y/n”

- you’d quickly ushered him in, and upstairs to your room

- he began to cry, and you rubbed his back comfortingly, throwing all your past conflicts out the window, just wanting the boy whom your heart ached for to feel safe here

- you weren’t expecting him t tell you that he’d killed Donovan, but you sure weren’t mad at him like you thought he’d be

you don’t hate me?”

“no” you answered softly

- you had a movie night together, and for a few hours, it seemed great, pocorn fights, for a whole Star Wars film you’d even slept on his shoulder

- you were woken up by Stiles getting up, and cleaning the area

you can stay the night if you want, my parents aren’t home”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Malia’s probably already waiting for me at home, and I don’t think your boyfriend would like me staying over night with you”

- surprisingly, his voice wasn’t dripping with sarcasm, or bitterness, but with reget, and a sad undertone.  you’d nodded, and followed him to the door as he put on his shoes and jacket

- you told him to get home safe, and he pulled you in for a hug that you hadn’t had in so long that just… replenished your well being

- Theo was a lying, bitchy, manipulative, jerk

- Lydia was admitted into Eichen

- Liam hated Scott

- Kira was with skin-walkers

- Stiles broke up with Malia

- and you were broken

“you were right you were right” you cried to Stiles on his doorstep in the pouring rain.  “I should’ve listened you’re always right”

“Shh..shh come inside”

- he wrapped you up in blankets and towels until your body stopped shaking, and you broke down to him, just like you had both done before.  You told him how you missed Lydia and Kira, how Malia wasn’t talking to you (to which he said ditto) and how Scott steered clear of everybody

- you fell asleep in his arms

- it was difficult, but the two of you had managed to cinch the pack back together, enough to kidnap Kira, and plan to save Lydia

- Theo’s pack seemed to have plans for her too, and you ended up getting held hostage by Theo in Eichen

- Scott and Stiles found you, his claws to your throat

- and you’d never seen Stiles so furious

- Scott ended up kicking ass, and you were thrown into Stiles’ arms

- YOU SAVED LYDIA!!!

- the pack barely did it but they escaped, and all went to Deaton’s where the emissary and Scott Kira and Malia stayed in the operation room to help Lydia

- you went to sit outside on the curb of the vet, needing frfesh air to clear your mind

- Stiles followed you and sat beside you

I was really freaked out tonight… when..uh.. when Theo had you”

“Trust me, I was to” You managed a soft laugh, and glanced over at him.  His eyes were stuck down on his shoes.

I didn’t like the thought of… of you being gone… or something” Stiles added in a weak voice.  Again, you smiled a little bit at him.

I’m not going anywhere Stilinski, you’ve got nothing to worry about” You put your hands into the pockets of the hoodie (the red one you’d stolen from Stiles earlier that night)

yeah but… but what if something did”

“Stiles” You turned to him.  “I’m fine, really, I don’t have a single cut, I’m okay, you don’t have to worry so much-”

- Stiles Stilinski had cut you off, leaning forward, cupping your cheeks, and kissing you for the very first time.  It was a long, warm, and very passionate kiss

y/n, I do have to worry… I-I love you-”

- you cut him off, holding his own face in your hands, leaning forward, and kissing him for the very second time in a needy, emotions displayed kiss

I love you too Stiles”

- you had a few happy tears in your eyes as you two kissed a few more times, only slightly aware of the pack watching you through the windows of the building

- you pretended not to notice Kira giving Scott thirty bucks

- Stiles drove everyone home, dropping you off last and trailing you to your doorstep

- he promised you that when all the Dread Doctor business was over, that he’d take you on a real date, to which you nodded, and kissed him quickly on the tips of your toes, before saying goodnight and heading inside for the night

- you high fived Stiles when Theo was dragged to the pits of hell, and that very night, went out on your first date

- it was a picnic at the overlook in the Beacon Hills Preserve, and it was beautiful.

- lots of kisses

- a really lot

- his hand was wrapped around yours as he drove you home, and as always, he stood with you at your door

I’m not usually one for taking boys home after a first date, but my parents aren’t home and I don’t wanna wait anymore”

- the infamous Stilinski smirk as you were pressed against the door in a matter of seconds, and familiar warm lips sealed yours

- the sex was nothing less of hot

- neck kisses, you weren’t surprised Stiles loved hickeys

- he let you set the pace, and asked you for consent five too many times

- the look on his face was priceless when you snapped on the sixth time, and you’d told him to shut up and fuck your brains out

- (but hey, he did just that)

- and after you fell asleep together, him on his back and your front pressed into his side, your head on his bare chest and falling asleep to the sound of his heartbeat in your ear

- lazy morning sex

- then shower sex

- then he made you breakfast, and you giggled half way through eating it

what?”

“oh nothing, I’m just surprised you haven’t thrown me onto the table yet”

“well I was waiting for you to finish eating”

- he wasn’t lying.  *clears throat and sputters*

- you applied for a lot of colleges together.  but here and there you’d come across one that seemed good for you, but would be far from Stiles.  You applied, on the off chance you even had the ability to get in, but didn’t tell him about the ones in New York, or Tennessee.

- you told Lydia, because you couldn’t just keep it to yourself.  There was a certain hype that came with college applications.  Lydia hated keeping secrets nowadays, but promised not to tell.  You never questioned her loyalty

- but one day you were telling her and Malia about a university in Maine called Colby.  How great it seemed, but how you had other options that would keep you and the pack closer to Beacon Hills.  You may have gotten a little vocal about the situation.

You want to go to school in Maine?” you’d whirled around so fast upon the voice of your boyfriend.  Lydia and Malia ran off as soon as you were looking away.

“N-no-”

“But you applied there?” Stiles asked, his voice a prime example of broken.

“Yes- but I didn’t- it was more of a wonder really” You felt guilty immediately.  “Stiles I didn’t want to.. I wasn’t- it was just-” You stopped trying to talk to take a deep breath.

Do… do you still want the vision?” He asked, stepping closer.  Your hands wrapped around his forearms.

“Of course I do Stiles, I want that with you” You said.  “I mean it, I want that” He nodded, eyes flickering to the ground with uncertainty.  “Stiles I love you, and the idea of going to college with you… maybe rent an apartment or something, really starting our.. our future? You held onto him tighter, and he looked at you.  “That excites me and frightens me at the same time okay?” He nodded.

- dramatic kisses

- everywhere.

- all the time.

- sometimes in lunch after a particularly difficult day in class, you’d wrap both arms around one of Stiles’, and lay your head on his shoulder in a half nap.

- but other days he’d have an arm around your waist, or your hands would be intertwined on one of your legs, or on the table.

- pushing him to take his class picture

y/n, I already took it”

“Uhm, no you didn’t Stiles.  There’s no photo here”

- Stiles argued with you for a bit bout, until you ended up dragging him to get his picture taken, again.

- Malia and you became really close friends, like connected at the hip kind of close.  It surprised everyone, but it made you happy.  Friends were important to keep close in this town

- Stiles called you later that night.

Baby what’s wrong it’s one am?” You’d mumbled upone answering.

“I-I saw- I saw them” His shaky voice replied.

Saw who Stiles?” You asked, sitting up in bed now.

“The ghost riders” 

- you went to his house to spend the night, and talked for a long time about what it all meant.  You fell asleep crying in his arms, and him cooing and hushing you while running his fingers through your hair.

- the next day at school you’d clung to him like crazy

- he was taken that night, you’d been sitting in the jeep with him, holding onto him so tightly you were sure it would be impossible for anyone to get him.  He’d repeatedly told you he loved you, anything he could.

y/n please try-”

“I couldn’t ever forget you Stiles” You said, crying hard as tears blurred your vision.  “I love you, I love you so much you’ll never know.  I want everything with you, I still do, I want us to go to college together, Stiles I wasnt to spend the rest of my life with you” You sobbed, and he held you tight, and leaving bruising kiss on your lips.

“I want that too y/n, I want that too” Your arms wound around his neck, holding him closer as his head was buried into your neck.

- you still cried in the jeep even after he was pried away from you, and dragged out through the door.


hehehehe this is sooo long I’ve had this in my drafts for months.

anywho here’s somethin a lil extra to just top off my excitement for being back on tumblr again

The 1 Thing Your Scenes MUST HAVE

Sully is a good representation of how I want people to react when enthralled by a story I’ve written:

But more often than not, I get a reaction more like this:

Or at least, I did. I couldn’t understand why my writing produced these less-than-stellar responses. I had meticulously worded every sentence. I’d made sure there were exciting parts. I had parceled out backstory, setting, and exposition so the reader could understand what the heck was going on. So why did eyes glaze over while reading my book? Why did MY eyes glaze over while reading my own work? 

The problem, I finally found out, was that my scenes didn’t turn. 

I was cramming all that exposition in right out of the gate, so the reader knew absolutely everything … which meant there wasn’t anything to find out. The scenes were just tiny chronicles where the main character set out to do something and accomplished it with flying colors. Nothing ever happened that surprised him. And consequently, nothing ever happened to surprise the reader.  

I wasn’t withholding information, and revealing it methodically. 

I wasn’t letting the story spin in new directions. It was always chugging along the straightforward track where I’d dropped my reader.

I wasn’t letting my scenes TURN.

To illustrate what I mean, here’s an example of a great scene with a great turn from a wonderful movie: Beauty and the Beast

*Opening music that makes me want to cry from how beautiful it is*

Beat 1:

“Once upon a time, in a faraway land a young prince lived in a shining castle…” (Action: Apparently the world takes action to make sure this prince lives a cushy existence.)

“Although he had everything his heart desired, the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind.” (Reaction: And he acts like a brat anyway.)

Beat 2:

“But then, one winter’s night, and old beggar woman came to the castle and offered a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter cold.” (Action)

“Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered at the gift, and turned the old woman away.” (Reaction)

Beat 3:

“But she warned him, not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within.” (Action)

“And when he dismissed her again …” (Reaction)

Beat 4:

“The old woman’s ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress.” (Action)

“The prince tried to apologize …” (Reaction) 


Beat 5:

“But it was too late, for she had seen that there was no love in his heart. And as punishment, she transformed him into a hideous beast and placed a powerful spell on the castle, and all who lived there.” (Action)

“Ashamed of his monstrous form, the beast concealed himself inside his castle, with a magic mirror as his only window to the outside world.” (Reaction)

Beat 6:

“The rose she had offered was truly an enchanted rose, that would bloom until his 21st year. If he could learn to love another, and earn their love in return, by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time.” (Action)

“As the years passed, he fell into despair, and lost all hope.”  (Reaction)

“For who could ever learn to love a beast?”

Turn: The 6th beat is the turn. The story has spun in a new direction, the direction the WHOLE STORY will motor towards. 

Revelation: There’s the big one of the scene turn, but I love how every action and reaction in this prologue feels like a revelation. Each one feels like it could be a scene on it’s own, but it’s told in a just few words, with beautiful imagery. There’s no fluff in this, nothing unnecessary, everything is perfectly needed. (Sorry, I just really love this opening. I can remember sitting in my little wicker rocking chair when I was four watching this in awe. This movie is one of the reasons I’m story obsessed.)

NOW let’s remove all curiosity and surprise from this scene. 

We’ll take away the atmosphere of “all is not as it seems”, the “seeking and learning significant information” feeling, the sense that we’re climbing to something significant. Instead of withholding and revealing snippets of information, after gradual beat-by-beat escalation of curiosity, we’ll dump all information right away. We’ll take this beautiful scene, and make it distinctly not a scene by removing all traces of a turn.

So! The purpose of this “section” of story is to communicate necessary information. What info? The guy used to be a terrible prince. Someone cursed him to be a beast. His castle and the people who live there are also cursed. He’s got a rose that will bloom until he’s 21. He’s supposed to fall in love with someone and get that person to love him back.  Or he’s going to be a beast forevermore. So, let’s give it a whirl.

Let’s say it opens up on Lumiere and the Beast. They’re just hanging out in the West Wing, the Beast watching the rose sparkle, Lumiere extinguishing and reigniting his left candle/hand for something to do.

LUMIERE: “So Master, it’s been years since you were turned into a beast and the castle staff was turned into objects.”

BEAST: “Yup.”

L: “I wish you hadn’t have upset that enchantress, and been a bit kinder.”

B: “Me too. Don’t know how.”

L: “Now our only hope to return to our human forms, is if you fall in love and get that person to fall in love with you.”

B: *Noncommittal grunt*

L: “Better happen soon, before that last petal on the magical rose falls. When you turn 21, it’s going to fall. And if you haven’t learned to love by then, well, we’re stuck.”

B: “I’m aware." 

L: "Yup.”

B: “Yup.”

Well, that was extraordinarily awful. 

So what about these scenes is different? (Besides one being a work of art and the other being agony in text form.) 

– One withholds information and reveals it slowly, turning the story at the end. 

– One is just an info dump. 

So how can a turn be accomplished?  There are four types of turns: 

– Surprise

– Amplified Curiosity 

– New Insight

– Spin in New Direction

A SURPRISE turn is the difference between what the character expects and what actually happens, surprising them, surprising the reader/audience that is enthralled by your story. A CURIOSITY turn is when a new mystery is presented to the reader, increasing their drive to find out what happens next. An INSIGHT one is when a scene ends by solving a mystery, answering a question that the audience has been wondering about. And a SPIN is just that, a turn that jolts the story into a new unexpected direction.

And how do they work in a scene? 

The turn happens at the end. It’s the point of the scene. Everything’s leading to it. Think of it as the period punctuation mark on the end of the sentence that is your scene. But really your reader is anticipating that turn throughout the scene.
It’s this anticipation and “gradual illumination” that’s crucial to a story turn. This is the wonderful curious feeling that keeps us turning pages. That sense that “all is not as it seems, and if I keep reading I’ll find out the truth.” which is so intoxicating. And this is accomplished with beats, the exchanges of action and reaction, each acting like a escalation on a roller coaster, each increasing anticipation for the drop. 

Turns and revelation anticipation are rather magical when you think about it. They really are (as Robert McKee says) the substance of story. (Or they’re magical to me. I said I was obsessed. Blame this movie!) 

Now I’m going to go watch Beauty and the Beast again.

  • what she says: I'm fine
  • what she means: Season 2 has already shown us character development from our main cast. Max, Nikki and Neil all seem to have slightly more respect for David and went to him immediately when Daniel started brainwashing kids. Additionally, David actually attempted to stand up for both himself and his camp. It's like the Season 1 finale actually happened, which is refreshing since so many shows still rely on the "everything resets to the status quo" trope. However, there are still so many mysteries. What camp was Max signed up for? What was david's home life like? What is MAX'S home life like? Why does Space Kid always wear his astronaut costume? Will the squirrel rebellion subplot pay off? Will Daniel return? Will Gwen do something useful with her degrees? I need answers.

So I took “and he gets really sad” to Langst levels because I have no control. 

A small case of the sniffles was nothing to Lance. He worked through it with ease, but when he woke up two days later with a throat so raw and so sore that it brought tears to his eyes, he began to second guess himself.

However, he still tried to power through, but halfway through breakfast, his weak, raspy voice gave out entirely when he was in the middle of reassuring Shiro that he just had a small cold.

He tried to talk, but all that came out was a soft squeak that left him wincing.

“Just a cold, huh?” Keith asked, one eyebrow arched in a teasing manner.

Lance huffed and poked at his throat. He cleared his throat and tried once more to respond vocally, but it was helpless and quite painful.

“You better not,” Shiro warned. “You’ll only make it worse.” He held an index finger up to his mouth, motioning for Lance to keep quiet.

Lance sighed, shoulders slumping in defeat. For the remainder of breakfast, he shoved his food around his plate with his fork as the others chattered around him as if nothing was wrong.

Keep reading

“The obsession, particularly online, with the homoerotic tension between Sherlock and Doctor Watson… The template for us was the Billy Wilder film The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, which deliberately plays with the idea that Holmes might be gay. We’ve done the same thing, deliberately played with it although it’s absolutely clearly not the case. He’s only a brain, ‘everything else is transport’ to him and John clearly says, “I’m not gay, we’re not together” but the joke is that everyone assumes that in the 21st century that these two blokes living together are a couple– what they wouldn’t’ have assumed in the 19th century. They’d have assumed they were bachelor best friends and now they assume they’re lovers. That’s obviously such fun to play with and the fact that people now assume, in a very positive way, that they’re together is a different joke to it being a negative connotation.”  Mark Gatiss in The Gay Times, February 2012

Hmm, I’m actually not so sure about that. Because I never got this joke (and no, that’s not a generation thing. I’m round about the same age as the show creators). Honestly, to me, two blokes sharing a flat in central London in the 21st century are just two blokes sharing a flat because it’s fucking expensive. I’d never assume anything else.

Even if one of the man was depicted as obviously gay (Girlfriend? Nor really my area. - Boyfriend? I know it’s fine.) - I wouldn’t assume any kind of romatic interest between them. I can’t see a joke there either.

But when their flat sharing gets laden with innuendo? For example, their landlady asking them if they share a bedroom. Another acquaintance taking them for being on a date. Those two blokes gazing at each other as if they were about to eat each other alive. One of the man killing for the other, who, in return, protects him from being prosecuted… Well, then I’d start to assume something’s going on - because it is shown to me and hammered home.

Only, I can’t see a joke there either…

So, what Gatiss described in the above interview wasn’t what happened. They were not just showing us two blokes living together. Because then no one in the 21st century would think of them as a couple. Moffat and Gatiss had to actively insert innuendo for their viewers to catch up on their ‘joke’ in the first place. They encouraged this on many levels: text, acting choices, casting, costume, music, lighting, cinematography.

They actively implemented homoerotic (sub)text in their show - only to lament at the same time that people cought up on it? That some viewers expected something to come out of it. Because, in the 21st century, no one thought it possible that it could just be a lame joke! Because there just is no joke to it.

The viewers took the positive attitude Gatiis desrcibes a step further and expected positive representation from the writers after playing with the inherent homoeroticism of the original stories. The fandom was far more advanced than the show runners, it seems.

And why play with the  homoeroticism it in the first place? I really can’t see where the fun might be in there, apart from cracking some cheap gay jokes that feed an outdated no-homo attitude?

What is there to play with when it’s not an issue anymore? And if it’s still an issue, I’m not sure that making fun of it ist the appropriate approach to it.

Every Possible Past

Lars sat with his knees pulled close to his body, leaning against the rough-hewn surface of the kindergarten wall. He trailed his finger through the thin coating of dirt on the rockbed floor. He drew distracted shapes and wrote out words and names in the dirt, all of which he wiped clean and started anew, his brow furrowed.

Pad watched from behind. Unseeable, her eye flickered between Lars and the drawings in the dirt. She picked up the hem of her dress and moved to his side, sitting down with only a few inches of space between them. Lars said nothing. Pad didn’t either, for a while.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Me? Nothing,” Lars muttered. He erased a smiling sun and started anew. “Thinking.”

“…About?” Pad asked after a moment of hesitation.

“Stuff,” he answered. He picked his hand up from the dirt, seemingly lost for what to do. “Like, about this. Here.” Lars motioned to the rock walls stretching too high to measure, filtering through just enough light to see the rock dust trailing through the air, large and enveloping. “Where I’m stuck. Forever, maybe. And I’m thinking about if just…if I coulda avoided any of this if I’d just stopped being a coward sooner. That ‘stuff’.”

“Oh,” Pad answered. She stuck her own finger in the dirt, tracing squiggles. “No, you couldn’t have. You don’t have to worry about that.”

Lars blinked. “I didn’t even explain.”

“You’re concerned that your fate may have been avoided if you had helped Steven escape from Topaz sooner.” Pad added her own smiley face among the squiggles in the dirt. “Or perhaps if you had saved your blond friend on the ship when Aquamarine and Topaz descended upon you.”

Lars straightened, back against the stone wall. Then he pushed himself standing. “How do you know this stuff?”

Pad paused, her finger trailing midway through the dust. “Oh. Oh of course. My future vision is broken. It can only see the past.”

“So you can see…what, everything that happened?”

“And everything that might have happened. Like an endless tree.” She stood, and dusted herself off. “Most Sapphires can see all the possible things that might happen. I can only see the things that might have happened.”

Lars swallowed, and he stammered, and slowly he found the words. “The things that might have happened.”

“Yes.”

“So you can tell me what would have happened to me if I’d done this differently.”

“Oh, yes!”

“What would have happened if uh…what if I had helped Sadie when she needed help on the ship?”

Pad remained silent for a few seconds. A hollow wind blew through the caverns. “Ah yes, I see that vision now. You would have plummeted into the water with all the human others. And Steven would have vanished on the ship. You would have returned solemnly to your home. The next morning, you would have entered into a building with a large ring on the top.”

“The Big Donut.”

“Yes. That’s what the sign would have said.”

“What about Sadie?”

Another few seconds of silence. Pad clasped her hands together. “She would be there too. But you would not speak much with her. The disappearance of Steven would have left you both in turmoil.”

Lars wrung his hands together. “Okay… okay okay. That would have happened a couple days ago, yeah? What would be happening right now? If I was home? Where would I be?”

Pad shook her head. “Oh. I can’t see the possible presents.”

Lars licked his lips. Then he nodded. “Okay so…if I asked you tomorrow, would you be able to tell me what would have happened today? If I never left home?”

“Oh, yes. Yes, I would be able to tell you that.”

“Okay. Okay then.” Lars leaned against the wall, sinking slowly down it. He patted the dusty ground beside him. “If you’ve got some time now. Then could you tell me what um—if I had gotten off that ship, and stayed home—what would I have done yesterday?”

Pad picked up the hem of her dress and dropped into the offered spot. She fell silent a few moments before her mouth opened. “You would have returned to your place of work once more—the Big Donut. And you would have spoken to Sadie. She would have been difficult to console, as would you, but you would have triumphed eventually. She would have laughed at a humorous remark you found from the internet. This would have made you proud.”

Ten years pass quickly for Gems, not so much for humans. Lars wasn’t sure how these last ten years had passed for him, slow and fast at the same time. His physical body has not changed much, though his hair has grown much longer.

Lars leaned his back against the rough stone wall, free of dust now, and he waited for Pad to appear by his side.

When she did, Lars sunk to the ground, knees against his chest, and patted the same spot as always—as he did every day—for Pad to sit.

“So…tell me about yesterday. If I had stayed home, what would have happened yesterday?” Lars asked with urgency. It was the same question he had asked every day of the last ten years, but he was anxious now. He knew what might occur.

Pad smiled. She clasped her hands together. “You would have taken Sadie out to a food place along the beach. It would have been the one she told you she loved as a small human. And you would have taken that polished and cut stone out of your pocket, in the soft black box, and you would have presented it to her. You would have lowered yourself onto one knee first, and unfurled the box, and said, ‘Sadie, would you marry me?’”

Lars’s heart pounded in his ears. He swallowed dryly, leaning in. “What would she have said?”

“She would have said ‘Of course Lars. Of course.’”

Lars let out a strained breath, a noise of relief, or perhaps disbelief. He blinked harder, and leaned back against the wall, and traced his hand through the dirt. “Oh my god… Oh my god she would have said yes. She would have said yes.”

“Yes, she would have,” Pad answered.

The noise Lars made was soft, and wet, and it echoed out. Bouncing against the vast and dark heights of the kindergarten walls, absorbed and deflected in the cold hollow shells of Gems long extracted. And then it was lost to the cavern, that isolated and dark sealed off place. Inescapable.

A hollow wind replaced it.

Lars’s hand traced the shape of a heart in the dust, and the small strained noises from his throat dried up until only tears leaked down his cheeks. His hand stopped once it trembled too hard to trace anything more.

flip.it
'We are the last Auschwitz survivors' | Europe | DW.COM | 26.01.2017
She kept silent for 40 years. Yet, since Judith Rosenzweig learned the Holocaust is being denied with greater regularity, she decided to speak about the ghettos, forced marches and concentration camps she survived.
By Deutsche Welle (www.dw.com)

“In my memoirs I wrote: “I was born in paradise, then I was banished, just like Adam and Eve.” I was born in 1930, and I was nine years old when the Germans arrived in the Republic of Czechoslovakia. The occupation started with various decrees - we were not allowed to go to the park or the cinema. Then Jewish children were barred from attending school. We were not allowed to study and I only went to four classes. In late 1941 they began deporting Jewish families to the Theresienstadt ghetto. My family was taken there in March 1942. 

[…]

“Trains were leaving all the time. We had no idea what was happening to the people that were taken away. In 1944 they took us: my mother, my father and my sister. My brother was already gone by then. When we arrived in Auschwitz the women were put into one line, the men in another. That was the last time I ever saw my father, standing there among the other men. When you arrived in Auschwitz, the camp physician, Dr. Josef Mengele, decided who was fit to work and who wasn’t. Those who weren’t were sent to the gas chambers immediately. He declared myself, my mother and my sister fit to work. They sent us to a barracks where we had to undress and hand over our clothes. Then they sent us to the showers and gave us very thin clothing. The next day Mengele came in and once again decided who would be sent to work.

[…]

"When my sister and I returned home my brother was already there. But the house was empty. I told my brother and sister that I was going to Israel. I didn’t want to stay someplace that I was not welcome. But it took two years before I could go to Israel. Eventually I traveled from Marseille to Jaffa. The date was May 15, 1948 - the first day of the state of Israel.

[…]

"It is very important to me [that people remember what happened] because there are always people that say we made it all up. I have been to Germany a couple of times to speak at schools. It is important that our memories aren’t forgotten. My generation is the last of those who survived Auschwitz. It is really difficult to understand what was done to Jews, and why. That should never be allowed to happen again, and one must share that message with the world. You cannot kill people because of their religion.”

anonymous asked:

hey, this may be a random question, but, what does love feel like? i wanted to ask this to some one who is engaged and already in love, because you have experience. but, i feel like whenever i read a fan fic or a romance novel or something, it feels... unrealistic. like it's just exaggerated to the point where its not real. this may seem weird but, i wanted to ask you this because i don't want to get my expectations too high and get disappointed when i actually feel it. thank you and bye :)

ooooh it’s such a hard question, because I feel like everyone experiences love quite differently? We all are unique, so one may express their love in such a way another person will not understand it but!! I think I can describe what it’s like for me?

It’s like. To be honest it feels unreal sometimes for me too, because I never really knew something this great and amazing can actually happen to someone (especially me?? wha???)

It’s this feeling of protection and security and peace, when you know you can always no matter what rely on someone. You know you can trust this person, tell them your deepest fears and regrets and just things about yourself no one quite knows about and they will not judge you. It’s like friendship but on a somewhat deeper level? (not to degrade friendships here!) 

It’s going home and knowing someone is always waiting for you. And it’s waiting for someone to return and the feeling of home whenever you’re with that person. You want to make them happy.

Love is a lot of cheesy things that make you feel really warm and content inside. But also going through hardships together and like, I know how cheesy that is, but sharing those troubles and burdens together is always so much easier.

I don’t know I just feel so content and good and just happy? I feel like love is just looking at someone’s soul and connecting with it. If soulmates exist I feel like Sasha is mine. 


As for expectations, I feel like for me it exceeded and surpassed them all? I never had such mutual understanding with probably anyone. BUT what I can say, in fanfics it’s such a common thing for people to have constant heart squeezes and leg shaking and all that stuff, and I feel like even if there is something in the beginning it doesn’t guarantee the relationship will last. When I had crushes before it was almost painful in that way, but..uh. I never felt GOOd. It was all the shaking that I thought was love but now i know it wasn’t in the slightest. So..feeling content and protected and to feel the same way about someone else is what love is, in my opinion. Love is looking through the looks and seeing the true human soul and heart:”)

I’m sorry, I tweeted that before but I’m a sap and you could call me a homosappiens.

Adored by Him

A/N: So this fic is inspired by the song “Adored by Him” by Dodie Clark. Yeah that’s really it… 

Warnings: Swearing but that’s normal.

Word Count: 2, 428

Your POV 

I honestly never expected any of this to happen. When I became friends with Dan, I did think he was handsome and funny. But I didn’t think I would fall for him as fast as I did. I always pushed away the feelings until they asked if I wanted to move in with them. Being around him 24/7 made it harder to conceal it so I just let it happen. No one knew about my feelings, except Phil, who figured out a year ago. I always expected the feelings to just go away but they didn’t.

But then she happened. Allison was Dan’s most recent girlfriend. They’ve been dating for many months now, and he was absolutely smitten (cheeky Dodie reference again) with her. He never spoke about how he felt about her, but I was able to tell. The way he looked at her with adoring eyes, and smile at the mere mention of her name. I don’t blame him though. She was beautiful, with her butterscotch hair and her smile that could shine brighter than the sun, I bet anybody would fall her easily. She was literally perfect, and I was just…well me. It was easy to figure out how she made Dan’s soul practically glow, and it hurt. A lot.  

I won’t hate you but oh it stings,

How does it feel to be adored by him? 

It was hard to hate Allison. She was super nice, and had the same sense of humor as Dan. Plus, she makes him happy. That’s what matters, right?


I was sitting on the couch, watching my favorite movie with Phil. It was raining outside so we decided to dedicate the day to watching a bunch of movies. Phil and I were cuddled up under a blanket, eating popcorn. It was relaxing to say the least. Dan was out at Allison’s house so, of course, Phil questioned me about my feelings.

“Are you ever going to tell him, Y/N?” Phil asked, nudging my arm with his elbow.

I pulled up the blanket to my chest, and sighed heavily. “Philly we’ve talked about this before. I’ll only ruin things so-" 

"You should tell him. It’s best to get it out there.” Phil gave me a sympathetic look. It’s like he knew Dan wouldn’t return the feelings but he didn’t want to keep any secrets. To be honest I’m surprised he didn’t tell Dan by now. 

“Phil, look-”

Phil and I jumped off the couch when we heard a loud bang, and stumbling coming from downstairs. We exchanged confused glances, and hurried to the front door to see Dan, stumbling around the entrance of our flat.

“Hi guys!” Dan said, his speech slurred.

“Dan what the hell happened!?” Phil questioned, running up to his best friend’s side and helping him take his shoes off. 

“Heh, Allison and I got in a fight. Stupid really-” He tripped over his shoes that he just took off and laughed. He looked up into my eyes and smiled. “Don’t worry I’m fine.” Dan pushed Phil’s hand off his shoulder, and walked up the stairs by himself.

“Y/N, do you want to make sure he’s okay?” Phil asked, walking up to my side as we slowly followed Dan up the stairs.

“Why?”

“Just talk to him." 

I let out another sigh, and took another glance at Dan, who stumbled into his bedroom. "Okay. I’m not telling drunk Dan anything though.” I pointed my finger at Phil, and let out a small laugh to lighten the mood. Phil shook his head, smacking my hand away and smiling.

“Just go.” He laughed. 

I walked to the kitchen, and poured a small glass of water for Dan. I ignored the aching pain in my chest, and the tears swelling up in my eyes. I put down the glass for a moment to take a deep breath, and recollect myself. After a few minutes, I made my way towards Dan’s room where I saw him softly crying. My heart broke at the sight. It pained me so much to see another girl make Dan hurt. I hated it. I walked towards Dan’s bed and gave him the glass of water. 

“Here you go, sweetie.” I sat at the end of his bed, waiting for his response. 

“Thank you.” Dan sniffed, taking a sip of the water. 

“You want to talk about what happened?” I moved closer to him. His legs were hanging over the edge of his bed and he was staring at the cup of water in his lap.

“She doesn’t trust me.”  

“What do you mean?” I was right by his side after I finished the question. I tried to make eye contact with him but he was so closed off, I decided to keep a little distance.

“She thinks that I’m cheating on her with you.” He lifted his head slowly and stared into my eyes. My face turned red and I stared at the ground. I felt the butterflies in my stomach go crazy, and I had to take a deep breath again to calm myself down. I looked back into his beautiful, chocolate eyes and stared in silence for a while.  

Pretty girl there’s no need to fret

Because it’s midnight, he’s drunk, and you’re the one in his head.

You don’t even have to try at all. 

“I can’t say I’m in love with her but I feel something…strong towards her you know? I’m not even sure if she feels the same. It’s just- It hurts a lot that she doesn’t even trust me. ” Dan’s eyes got glossy, and he stared down at his cup again. All I did was nod my head. I understood where he was coming from. Someone you may be in love with and they might not even return the feeling. How ironic. 

“I understand, Dan. But you should get some rest, then talk to her in the morning.” I flashed a fake smile at Dan and stood up from his bed. I stood in front of him, and he stared into my eyes like he was searching for something.

“Thank you, Y/N. You’re honestly the best.” Dan put his glass down on his bedside table and got up to give me hug. I accepted it, taking in his warmth for that short moment I had. I sighed when he pulled away and sat in his bed. “You want to…stay with me for a bit?” He asked, not making eye contact. I gave him a weak smile, and nodded, sitting next to him as he got comfortable underneath the blanket.

I lost track of time, waiting for Dan to fall asleep. I stared at his sleeping figure for god knows how long, I felt like a complete creep. He looked so peaceful with his head resting in my lap it was hard not to. I gently stroked his hair as he slowly fell asleep, his arms wrapped around my body as his head rested on my leg. I checked the time on his phone, 1:00 am. I noticed his lock screen, expecting it to be a picture of him and Allison. But instead it was a picture of him, me, and Phil at VidCon on our day off. I smiled at it, but quickly my smile faded when a text from Allison popped up. I decided to ignore it, and finally leave Dan’s side. 

I crept towards the kitchen, hoping not to wake Dan or Phil up. However, to my surprise Phil was standing in the kitchen, drinking some tea while leaning against the counter. 

“So, how did it go?” He asked, staring at me. 

“She doesn’t trust him apparently. Allison thinks he’s cheating on her with…me.” I sighed. All my emotions that I’ve been holding in all night were surfacing, and I wasn’t going to let it happen. “Um, he’s asleep now. He asked me to stay with him for a little while and I lost track of time because he was…uh-" 

"Cuddling with you?” Phil flashed me a smile, but it faded when he looked into my eyes and noticed the tears coming up. He gave me a sympathetic look and walked closer to me. “You should just tell him so he knows. So you don’t have to keep hurting. He will understand, Y/N." 

"I know Phil. It’s just- it hurts seeing them together so much. And of course I want him to be happy! But that selfish part of me wants him to be happy with me. God, it fucking hurts.” I felt a warm streak roll down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away, looking away from Phil. 

“Y/N.” I knew he was trying to make me look at him, but I hated being this vulnerable. “Y/N.” I gave in and stared into Phil’s icy blue eyes. It was full of sympathy, and I couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Phil, don’t look at me like that please. It’s only making me feel worse.” I felt more tears surfacing and let out a heavy sigh. I heard Phil mumble a small apology and he embraced me in a warm, loving hug. At that point I finally broke. I started sobbing into his shirt, with every sob he would hold me tighter, and tell me everything was going to be okay. He gently ran his hands through my hair. I pulled away from Phil, and sniffed, gently rubbing my nose. 

“Y/N, I know it hurts but-” Phil paused in the middle of his sentence and stared behind me. I looked up to Phil, then turned around to see what he was looking at. There was Dan, his hair curly and disheveled, and his empty glass in his hands.

“What’s wrong?” Dan asked, noticing my red, puffy eyes and the tear stains on Phil’s shirt. He looked into my eyes and I could tell he was concerned.

“N-Nothing.” I lied.

“Obviously there’s something wrong, Y/N, tell me.” Dan walked over to the counter and placed his cup on the surface. I looked up to Phil, and nodded, signaling for him to give us some alone time. When Phil left the room, Dan pulled me into a tight hug, and for the second time that night I broke down. “Want to talk to me about what happened?”

I pulled away from Dan and stared at the floor. “It’s not really about w-what happened. It’s more…what’s happening.” I let out a fake chuckle. Dan shot me a confused look, and backed up to lean against the counter.

“Tell me what’s going on or so help me god Y/N I will-”

“Okay. Um. I guess.”

“Spit it out, please.” Dan tilted his head, giving me a worried look. God I can’t handle this anymore.

“Okay, you don’t even have to respond to this…but I really need it out in the open.” I could feel my heart beating out of my chest, and I took deep unsteady breath. “I just need you to know that…that” I stared into Dan’s eyes and I could feel my heart aching all over again. I felt tears pouring out of my eyes and saw Dan’s tall figure making his way over to comfort me again but I pulled away.

“Please don’t. You’re just going to make this harder.”
“Y/N tell me. Please, you’re making me worried.” I realized that Dan and I were standing really close, closer than we usually are. I looked into his beautiful eyes like it was the last time then stared at the floor.

“I think I’m in love with you.” I mumbled. 

“What? Speak up, love.” Dan said softly. 

“Fuck.” I ran my fingers through my hair and avoided eye contact at all costs. “I think I’m in love with you and it fucking stings so much to see you and Allison together. I mean I don’t blame you, or her. Allison is like the definition of perfect. I mean she makes me look blind with how adventurous she is and you look at her like the world is fucking perfect. It’s so stupid to think that I could compare to her. But god, do I wish it was me in your arms instead of her. Don’t even get me started about how I feel about you because there is too much history to even go over.” I shook my head, staring at the ground, watching my tears hit the white kitchen tiles.

“Y/N, can you look at me please?” Dan was still speaking softly. 

“Dan I told you, you don’t have to even say anything. You could just simply ignore it and leave, I’ll get the point." 

"Look at me, Y/N.” Dan said, more stern but still full of care. I rolled my eyes and stared into his eyes. Even though my vision was blurred I could still see the small glimmer in his eyes. “I’m sorry for-”

“Dan I told you, you don’t have to do this." 

"Y/N, we need to talk about this. We can’t just ignore it.”

“Well I’ve been ignoring it for 3 years now, so I think I’m good. I know the speech you’re about to give me and I just…” I let out a muffled sob into my hand, and looked back up to him. “Please I can’t take this right now." 

"Please let me just-" 

"Dan, I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have said anything. I really need fresh air…I’ll be back in a bit." 

Dan looked over to the clock on the oven, and slowly moved towards the door. "It’s 1:20, Y/N you can’t go outside alone." 

"Well I am, so please move.” Dan was blocking the doorway. I made eye contact with him and got lost in his eyes again. I felt like time slowed down when we stared into each other’s eyes, but I broke the contact because I felt more tears coming. Dan reluctantly walked up to me, opening his arms to give me a hug. But instead, I pulled away from him. 

“I’m so sorry.” I mumbled, and ran down the stairs to the front door, putting on my shoes and coat. 

“Y/N wait-”

I left before I could hear anymore. I let the cold London air enter my lungs, as I tried to relax from what happened, and trying to decide if I should go back and face Dan, or go to a friend’s house. I ultimately decided on staying outside for a while. Sitting on a park bench staring at the trees in the park as I replayed what happened through my head. 

What am I going to do?

A/N: Second part? Or leave it there? YOU DECIDE