and this is the scene where i was like 'okay you are my favorite'

I have a deep and abiding love for this screencap from That Scene at the end of episode ten:

So strong is my affection for this single still frame that it’s called ‘Tango Screencap is Best Screencap’ in my image folder, although it could just as easily be called something like “That’s When Viktor Knew” or “I cry” or “LOOK AT IT! JUST LOOK AT IT!!!”

Out of every single solitary frame in YOI, of which there are conceivably tens of thousands, I can unhesitatingly say that this is my absolute favorite, and I will tell you why:

Look at Viktor. Look at beautiful, touched-starved Vitya, completely entrusting Yuuri with the role of not dropping him, strong Yuuri, mysterious Yuuri. Those eyes are so deep that Viktor might drown in them, and he would be okay with that. Yuuri’s arm, wrapped completely around him, warm, solid, God. Yuuri presses his hand flat against Viktor’s stomach. Viktor takes in a gust of air that expands his belly into Yuuri’s touch–hot. Yuuri is drunk, blushing with it, and so close that Viktor can feel his heartbeat, can smell his bodyscent underneath whatever fragrance he’s wearing. It’s the most exhilarating, erotic, inexplicable thing that has happened to Viktor in years, and he’s thoroughly swept off his feet.

Unshown is the shot at the end of the dance where Yuuri spins Viktor off and blows him a kiss, at which point Viktor has to furiously fan himself. Yuuri is far too drunk for this to go anywhere tonight, but someone here must have his number? Maybe they could meet up again at Worlds. Or hell, Viktor could go to Japan, he’s not above an intercontinental booty call.

“I’m going to marry that man,” Viktor tells no one in particular, as Yuuri and his equally drunk coach hobble out of the banquet hall leaning on each other. “I’ll make such a good trophy husband.”

He’s heartbroken when nobody can give him Yuuri’s number. Even more heartbroken when Yuuri makes no attempt to contact him.

Then someone sends him a YouTube link.

Mutually Assured Dating

‘You were singing really loudly in the shower when I broke into your apartment but then i heard you slip and crash and oh god i should probably check on you in case i get done for murder instead of just robbery’ AU


It took all of fourteen seconds for Derek to realize he was in the wrong apartment.

First, he noticed the very large and scuffed up sneakers and boots ditched haphazardly kind of near the door but half into the living room. Cora was meticulous about her shoes and kept them neatly arranged in a shoe rack right next to the door. The only time they touched the floor was when her feet were in them.

Second, the stuff. There was so much stuff everywhere; clothes thrown over the back of the couch, dishes across the coffee table and all over the kitchen counters, books on every surface, a gaming console dragging wires across the floor and surrounded by games, in cases and out of them. Cora was an unintentional minimalist, in that she threw out anything she didn’t need and lacked a single sentimental bone in her body. Derek and Laura regularly made trips to wherever she lived to save family keepsakes and memories from her ruthless cleaning sprees.

Then he noticed the manly warble coming from somewhere deeper in the apartment, and Cora’s favorite topic of rant floated lazily to the forefront of his mind.

—but my neighbor, oh my god this guy! I’m going to kill him if I ever see him in the hall! His bathroom shares a wall with my bedroom and he sings in the shower, every shower, at all hours. Literally all hours, like 4am, and he only sings Christmas carols at 4am. I’ve have Jingle Bells stuck in my head for a week! 

Shoes, stuff, singing.

This was not Cora’s apartment.

Keep reading

let me help you fall in love with tanaka’s character (i’m gonna cut some parts from the first volume of the manga).

this is tanaka ryunosuke. he appears for the first time in the manga on vol 1 . he’s a second year and as you can see, he’s got that delinquent boy look going on. oh, and you’re gonna see that facial expression a lot, it’s his signature. it’s meant to intimidate people, but, no, just no, it’s hilarious af. 

guys, guys, guys, tanaka is a dork. we love dork characters, right?

he’s so simple minded. he’s just like bokuto. i’m dying.

whether you’ve watched the anime or you’re reading the manga, you probably know that the weird duo knocks off the vice principal wig, leading to daichi kicking them out of the gym. this scene is right before any of that happens. daichi is trying to talk to hinata and kageyama, but they’re just too absorbed in arguing that they do not hear him. tanaka is scolding them because daichi san is talking. he respects the third years a lot and wants the first years to respect them as well. we love respectful characters, right?

and here is the part where i start talking about how good of a senpai (and a person) tanaka is. this guy wakes up at 4 to let those two practice in the gym without daichi knowing (heh). this is obviously not the only time tanaka looks out for his kouhais. there are so many scenes in which you can see tanaka taking care of the kids. my favorite one? it’s probably the one from the OVA. if you still haven’t watched it, go watch it, because if you still think that tanaka’s nothing more than a funny gag, you’ll understand that you’re wrong. so wrong.

he is such a caring person. karasuno, his teammates mean so much to him. when hinata and kageyama don’t pass their exams, they need to re-do it, but in order to practice with the others in tokyo they need a ride. in the OVA you see tanaka asking his sister if she can do this favor for him, at first she tells him no because it’s an at least four hours drive, but then she sees her brother counting his savings. guys, guys, guys, here me out, tanaka’s willing to use his own money for hinata and kageyama. unfortunately he doesn’t have enough, but do you know what he does to provide a ride for them? he kneels in front of his sister and begs her. and he did not tell anyone how hard it was for him to provide a ride for hinata and kageyama. y’know, he deserves being called tanaka senpai by everyone everyday of his life, tanaka is the man

but this, this is probably what i like the most about him. this is just an example, okay? here we have tsukishima, telling them about kageyama’s nickname. tanaka has never liked people talking shit about others. look at his expression, he’s mad. he’s gonna scold tsukishima, but daichi stops him. this happens not a lot, but a shit amount of lots. tanaka is always ready to shut up people who belittle others. he steps up for kageyama, he is always there for hinata, he’s always ready to say “no, don’t say that you’re great” whenever someone is self depricating or he’s ready to fight whenever they talk shit of his friends. he’s such a good character, guys. 

(oh, and have i already told you how strong this person is? when oikawa’s targeting him he puts himself together. all by himself. most players wouldn’t be able to do that, they’d be so down because they’d made a lot of mistakes, but tanaka? not tanaka, bitch. tanaka is stronger than that. tanaka is better than that. tanaka slaps himself and receives that powerful serve.)

tanaka is in my top 5 favorite haikyuu characters and now you kinda know why. i think there’s so much more i need to say, but this post is getting too long. but please, give a little love to tanaka ryunosuke. call him tanaka senpai. he deserves it.

I’m bitter AND sticky so let’s get gooey on topic!

People just? forgot that ton of season 3 episode’s visuals are  actually amazing? I mean it could be just me but this season clearly trowed a ton of budget into some scenes an episodes! 

Super Watermelon Island got an amazing fluid fight scene between two giant women and it was as energetic as it sounds 

Gem drill, even tho it was pretty chilly on animation, had ton of detail on Steven’s faces, I find it like such a sweet detail having in mind the episode was focusing a ton on Steven and his connection with the cluster 

(this is my personal favorite)

Hit the diamond had a TON of characters on-screen at the same time, having in mind 5 of them where new characters and they had to design new clothing for 5 of them 

Even though my favorite part of this episode is the bond between Amethyst and Peridot, I think Too Short To Ride was pretty consistent, I am in love every time they put little lines under the eyes of the characters because it usually helps to remark the emotion they are feeling, is personal. 

Stevonnie’s back for Beach City Drift and the thing I like the most about this episode is the backgrounds and the color choices, they are AMAZING and pretty relaxing to watch on their own. 

Monster reunion was pretty harsh to see for me because painful scenes (aka scenes where the character is clearly in pain) make me feel incredibly bad, but I again shot out how they draw emotions and the subtle lines that make it all even better. 

More than for animation itself, I praise a lot Alone At Sea because of writing and atmosphere, and the last one really works, I felt incredibly… tense, when Jasper showed up, how she acted and the way she expressed herself, and how the colors got dark and the rain around it… just gosh

Even tho it was a pretty okay-o episode in general, I really liked Gem Hunt’s backgrounds, the whites and cold tones made a good mix with Jasper’s colors and really helped her to pop out! 

I’ve talked a lot about Bismuth, so at this point everything would feel redundant, so I’ll just say that the first and last scenes have pretty good colors, one being calm pastel tones and the other reddish dark tones #BRINGHERBACK2K17

And finally, Bubbled, which has some on the most beautiful space backgrounds i’ve seen in an animation product, is the feeling of emptiness that makes the most of the episode personally, how is literally just Steven and Eyeball and Eyeball pretty much tries to kill him, in other situations you can think about something going on, but is the fact that they are in space what makes it feel… well… empty, giving more focus to the characters that contrast the most in a sea of dark cold tones and blacks! 

PLL ENDGAME FINAL THEORY

Okay guys, so here is my theory. It’s long so bear with me. I hope you’re convinced with this one

In this theory, I will tell you who Uber A is. Who killed Charlotte. Who killed Jessica. How every character is involved in the story. What the initials A.D. stand for. Everything that we are yet to know at this point. 

Who is Uber A? There are two people. A twin of a character we know and her helper. We have an identical twin among us that has been behind everything that we are yet to know. Bethany Young is the twin and she is Uber A. The show is coming in full circle. She killed Jessica, Charlotte, Sara Harvey, etc. Uber A and Charlotte’s killer ARE the same person. She is not here to avenge anyone’s death like they want us to believe. She’s here for revenge for having her life ruined. 

They promoted this new A as the deadliest and most twisted A of all the As (and the one who loves the game the most). That description doesn’t fit with someone who is avenging someone’s death. 

It all starts with Bethany and Charles. The night Marion Cavanaugh died. According to Charlotte, Bethany pushed Marion Cavanaugh and blamed her. This isn’t true. Charlotte killed Marion, Bethany witnessed it, and Jessica covered it. Charlotte blamed Bethany but Jessica paid Wilden to rule it out as a suicide. Flashbacks aren’t always true. It’s visualized on what the person is saying. Jessica wouldn’t cover up the murder if Bethany did it. That’s why in Bethany’s recordings we would hear her saying to someone “she’s a bitch, she’s an evil bitch!” It’s not clear as to who was she talking about but it was definitely Charlotte or Jessica. Bethany drew pictures of Jessica with horns and the word ‘liar’ all over it

Charlotte lied in her story so Alison and the rest of the liars would feel bad for her. This is why some of the things don’t make sense. A big part of her story was a damn lie. Charlotte is the biggest liar on the show. Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Bethany got payback after the time jump by murdering Charlotte and throwing her off the bell tower, just like Charlotte pushed Marion from Radley. What I love about this is that Uber ‘A’ is putting the girls through hell to find Charlotte’s killer when she is the one behind it.

Who’s Bethany’s twin? Spencer Hastings. Mary Drake had Spencer and Bethany. Both are identical twins. One was adopted by The Hastings and the other one was put into family services and was adopted by the Young family and was sent to Radley later on. Before you all say “Bethany was two years older than Spencer and the rest of the girls” Charles was supposedly older than Jason but in reality they were the same age. Jessica and Kenneth came up with that lie to keep the adoption a secret from everyone else as it was revealed in 6x20. Bethany’s information was made up to keep her a secret from everyone

Peter Hastings was responsible for this and this is why he wanted Toby to stop investigating his mom’s death and sign the papers to close Radley back in season 4. The more he was investigating the more got to the truth. 

This is why we never saw her face when she escaped Radley. She has Spencer’s face. And this is going to be the ultimate final twist the writers already talked about. Lets be real, if she was a random girl we would see her face. They could’ve casted literally any blonde for this scene and they would show us her face. We still have yet to see her face as a teenager

One of the biggest mysteries on the show are Bethany’s drawings. There is a drawing of a woman falling (Marion), the picture of a demon (Jessica) taking a kid (Charles) away. We also see pictures of her but they’re all distorted. We can’t see her face

This makes me believe that she has part of her face disfigured or doesn’t want to show her face AND this is why Uber A wears masks

I will show you proof that Mary had a third child (which is the twin) In 7x08, Spencer and Aria go visit Dr. Cochran and he tells the girls that he helped Mary delivered “Two OF her babies” as opposed to her “two babies” hinting about another child. One was adopted and the other was put in family services. Mary was giving Spencer hints about a twin in the premiere telling her how much she and Melissa looked alike. 

This is one of my favorite scenes from 7A because Mary was indirectly telling Spencer her relationship with her parents and how they met a long time ago leaving Spencer confused

What does Sara Harvey have to do with everything? Sara was killed for knowing too much. She was a girl from another town involved in all this mess. Sara ran way from her home and Charlotte kidnapped and forced her to be her accomplice. She used her as a decoy in all the stuff that she was planning to do like “The Lodge Fire”. She knew stuff about Charlotte and was going to tell the girls and run away but Uber A was outside her room waiting to kill her. Never ever underestimate “A”. It happened with Jessica, Mona and finally to Sara. 

I hate to say this but Sara wasn’t the real Black Widow. The real Black Widow is the twin Bethany. She is the ENDGAME. I have proof of this. The first time we were introduced to the Black Widow was in the season 4 premiere titled “A is for A-L-I-V-E” (the title is a clue). Her introduction was really creepy and weird. It felt like a new character that was VERY connected to the story. Whoever this person was did NOT want to be seen in public because either they’re supposed to be dead, they are secret twin of someone or they are looking for them and that’s why she was wearing a mask and we can see this at the end of the episode

In 7x01 when the girls see the fake Hanna hanging in the bell tower. There was a clue that leads back to 4x01. Caleb looks at this phone and it’s 4:01 a.m. The writers tend to use numbers as clues. The episode where we are introduced to Black Widow

Black Widow had the girls as dolls at the lair. Sara may have been bad but having the girls as their dolls is completely twisted and it doesn’t fit her with character. Sara wasn’t wearing a mask when she lifted up her veil. I’m pretty sure the writers did this on purpose so we could catch the fakeness of Charlotte’s story.

Another thing that doesn’t make sense about her story. She shot Wilden twice. Lets be real here. She would know if he was really dead after shooting him. Why would she need Sara to go and check if he was really dead? This makes absolutely no sense. Here is more proof that Bethany is the real Black Widow. Toby was getting messages to take the RV and he would know what really happened to his mom. Who would know what happened to his mom? The witness. -A was helping Toby solve his mom’s mysterious death

What I’m about to say I believe no one has said it before. Bethany was working with Mona but Mona didn’t know who she was working for. Mona created the A game so Bethany could finish it. This has always been Bethany’s game. Mona loved playing the game and the last thing she would do was to reveal herself. Someone KNEW what Mona had done that night Alison disappeared and Mona was being blackmailed about it. She had no other choice than to reveal herself. How do I know this? Easy, Mona saying to Spencer “Either you join the A-Team, or you disappear” 

And of course Mona’s monologue when she’s admitted for evaluation: “I know they’re watching me, I don’t look bad considering… I like this lipstick, what’s it called? Toffee tango? (voice changes) They think it’s over, Loser Mona is going to the nuthouse and those precious liars are going home to sleep with their windows open and their doors unlocked. Don’t they know that’s what WE want?”

Okay there’s been theories that it was Charlotte talking after Mona but it’s impossible because Charlotte was a patient at Radley and met Mona later during her stay. Whoever was talking was helping Mona all along and she was present in the season 2 finale. She was at the masquerade party. She was right in front of us wearing a red dress with a full mask. The camera focuses on her. She has been watching them all along

Now. I will talk about her helper. Her helper is Dr. Wren Kingston. Wren has been an A-team member since the beginning. Mary sent him to Rosewood check on The Hastings and the only way to continue reporting her what the Hastings were doing was to get engaged to Melissa Hastings but he fell for Spencer and everything was ruined

I will give you the biggest clue that Wren is AD’s main accomplice

In 7x01, we see Mary talking to someone on the phone and according to Mona, “It’s definitely a man. I think he has an accent. Maybe Aussie, maybe British. Note: This can’t be Rollins because Mary and Rollins were not in touch for a couple of days

This is going to sound really twisted but I don’t think Mary cared about Charlotte at all. Charlotte was looking for her and she was spending time in other countries. 

Something that hasn’t been explained is why Wren suddenly decided to volunteer in Radley when Mona was admitted there. He volunteered to continue the A game but with a new leader (Charlotte DiLaurentis). Eddie Lamb suspected and knew all along that Wren was bad news

The infamous visitor’s pass. Wren didn’t make the pass for Charlotte. it was for Bethany but under the name CeCe Drake. She used Charlotte’s “alias” when she had her out privileges. She was sneaking into Radley under that name to visit Mona wearing a Red Coat. That pass couldn’t have been for Charlotte because she was already a patient there. All she needed was to get out of her room and visit her. Why would she need a visitor’s pass?

Mona said to the liars in 3x24 “that she made a deal with the devil and she gave me a way in and out of that place”

Charlotte wasn’t giving her a way in and out of Radley because she needed Mona to get out of that place without anyone noticing as she stated in 6x10.

So who was Mona talking to? Uber A. The real Red Coat and Black Widow. 

Only someone who works or was a patient for a long time knows the exits and secret doors. Bethany escaped Radley so she would definitely know the secret exits

Uber A manipulated everyone to do her dirty work. Just like Mona, Charlotte was addicted to the A game so why would she just give herself up? Because someone was telling her what to do. And this is why they introduced us to the board game. This is how Uber A was manipulating everyone. Telling them what to do.

In 6x10, Mona tells the girls that she didn’t tell CeCe about them but somebody at Radley did start sending her riddles and twisted rhymes. More proof that someone else was seeing her. 

The last time we hear about Wren is in 6x17 in a flashback of Hanna and Melissa in a restroom. According to Melissa, he was in contact with Charlotte when she was at Welby. Melissa tells Hanna that Charlotte ruined her relationship with him because he found out that she killed the girl in the grave. Wren was blackmailing Melissa about this throughout 6B. This is why Melissa was terrified if someone else had the tape confession because someone was targeting her.

Now the last question. Who’s in the grave? A stranger that was killed and buried with the outfit. Grunwald rescued Alison and someone with a red sleeve rescued Bethany. There are two different scenes with two people wearing different clothes and rescuing someone. Whoever was identified was killed and buried with the yellow top outfit

You can follow me on twitter @boyfataie if you want to discuss it

Birthday Girl (NSFW/Smut)

Originally posted by dailytomholland

Author: Arfrona-and-Marvel

Word Count: 2965

Warnings: Cursing/Sex

Pairings: Peter Parker x Reader

Type: Fluff, Smut

Note: Virgin reader and Peter :) 

Requested: nope

——————

Y/N’s POV

Peter covers my eyes with a blindfold and helps me stand up.

“This is kinky, Parker, what are you planning?”

Peter laughs nervously and I feel him getting more timid with his actions.

“Will you stop, Y/N? It’s just to keep the surprise a surprise.”

I giggle at his obviously flustered state from my sex joke.

I let him lead me out of the room to the unknown destination, one hand holding mine and the other on my waist as he gently pushes me along.

“Peterrrrrrr it’s taking so loooooong,” I whine, just to annoy him.

“Just a little farther, Y/N, bear with me here.”

My foot brushes against something soft.

“Is that another gym sock?”

“Uhhhhh… No it isn’t…” There’s a loud shuffle as he tries to kick the offending article away discreetly.

Oh, he’s so adorable when he’s lying.

He stops and lets go of my hand and waist. There’s a soft scrape to my left as he pulls out a chair.

Heh. Pulls out.

“Here ya go, love.” He takes my hand and gently guides me into the seat. He slips and I miss the seat, landing on the soft, carpeted floor instead. There’s a solid thunk as what sounds like Peter’s head collides with the wall.

“OH MY GOD PETER ARE YOU OKAY?” I tear off the blindfold and see the poor boy rubbing his head, where there’s bound to be a bump forming.

“I’ll live.”

“Oh you poor man-child, let me get you some ice.”

I rush towards the kitchen, noting the very nicely set-up dinner table for two.

He must be devastated that he couldn’t properly surprise me.

I stop as I enter the kitchen, trying to process the scene before me.

He hobbles up behind me, trying to stop me.

“Wait, Y/N, don’t go into the- ah shit you’ve seen it.”

I look around to see the room decorated with strings of lights and roses.

“Oh, Peter. You shouldn-” Peter kisses me before I could finish my sentence.

“You like it?” He asks as he pulls me closer for another kiss, deeper than the last.

I pull away before nodding, “Yes, Peter, I love it. Thank you.”

He beams at me before leading me to the table and pulling out a chair for me.

“My princess,” he jokes, gesturing for me to take a seat.

I sarcastically bow, “My knight.”

—–

After dinner, I stand up to help clean up the dishes.

Peter shoos me away and tells me to sit down while he takes care of it.

I don’t bother arguing with him, because I know fighting with him would be pointless with his stubbornness.

I stay seated while he collects the dishes and kisses my nose before leaving to wash them.

I watch him walk away and smile to myself as I take a rose from the vase on dining table and twirl it in my hands.

I giggle to myself as I think about our past two years together.

How sweet Peter was with his cute pickup lines and our weekly movie dates.

How shy he is when we kiss and how much of a gentleman he is.

I continue to reminisce until I see Peter standing in the doorway.

His cheeks are red and his hands are shaking a little.

He’s nervous.

“Peter, love, are you alright?” I ask.

He gives me a half smile and he walks over slowly, his body language screaming nervousness.

“Peter?”

“I, uh, I have one more gift for you,” he says.

“Peter! This is already so much, please that’s enough,” I laugh and I stand up to hug him.

He hesitates before hugging me back and now I see how nervous he really is.

“Peter? What’s wrong?” I ask, noticing that his legs are shaking.

He looks away from me as he reaches into his pocket and gives me a small index card with the letter V written on it.

Oh.

I look up at him questionably and he rubs the back of his neck, his face slowly acquiring the color of the roses on the table.

“It’s um. I-I, uh,” Peter stumbles.

“I get it Peter, V-Card,” I look up at him and smile before kissing his chin and then his nose.

“It’s a very unique present, Peter,” I say as I lean closer to Peter and kiss him again. He places his hands gently on my hips.

I lean back and smile, “So I can cash this in anytime I want?” I ask.

His face reddens a little before he nods.

“How about right now?” I ask slowly, hoping he would get a hint and suggest something.

He looks at me in the eye for a few moments before breaking contact and looks down at his feet.

“I’ve got another surprise for you, love,” Peter says, reaching over to the counter and giving me the blindfold again.

I look at him suspiciously before putting the blindfold on again.

“Just trust me, Y/N,” Peter says softly. I relax a little and reach out to hold his hand as he leads the way.

I am assaulted with a barrage of smells as we turn into a room, where everything sounds slightly muffled, as if it’s filled with soft furniture. My feet brush against… rose petals? I smell my favorite scented candles as well as… Febreze. Lots of Febreze.

Dammit Parker why don’t you clean this house more often?

His hands leave my shoulders for a few seconds and I hear some shuffling around me, no doubt he’s cleaning up whatever’s been left strewn around his ro-

The blindfold falls off suddenly and I’m left shocked at the scene in front of me.

Though I’ve been in his room a million times before, I’ve never seen it this clea-

Romantic. It’s never been this romantic.

Everything’s been swapped or covered with a red velvet and the lights are off, leaving only the candles to light the room. A gasp  escapes my lips. Peter, who is in the process of furiously trying to shove what looks to be a red and blue suit into the closet, whips his head around, eyes wide open.

“It fell off? Shit, now I can’t badmouth the baddies anymore about their lousy knots… Anyways, surprise?” he tries with a tight smile.

God, he’s so adorable when stuff goes wrong.

“Peter… just ask me…”

“Well, I mean you don’t have to, but… I…” Peter tries to start but fails to finish his sentence as I

lean closer, until our noses are almost touching. We stay that way, looking into each other's’ eyes for a while.

“Hi,” Peter greets me.

“Are you going to kiss me yet?” I ask, slightly impatiently. Face redder, than the cushions, he does just that.

He makes the first move, turning his head and closing the space between us. My lips meet his, agonizingly slowly. His hands cup my face and pull me closer, and I return the kiss with a passion I didn’t know I had. Our lips locked, he pulls us down onto the bed. One of his hands finds its way into my hair while the other one grasps my neck. My own hands find their way under his shirt and around the back of his head. He bites my lip, accidentally, and I jerk back, not expecting the bite.

“Oh my god Y/N I’m so sorry oh my god are you okay oh my god are you bleeding?” he babbles, moving his head around to check my lips.

I quickly run my tongue over my lips to check for blood

“I’m okay, Peter.””

“Hi, okay, Peter, I’m Peter,” he quips back,not missing a beat.

I laugh at Peter lightly before pulling down his pants.

“W-Wait, Y/N, are- are- are you sure ab-”

I cut him off with a finger pressed to his lips.

“Shhhhhh. Yes, Peter. I am sure. Now shut up and let me make you happy,” I say, kissing his nose to reassure him.

“But, I want to make you feel good fir-” Peter tries to object but lets out a moan instead as I palm his member through his boxers.

I smile as I gently squeeze tighter and watch him throw his head back and moan a little louder. I then pull down his boxers as I eagerly snake down his body and watch as his member is freed from its restraints. I wrap my hand around it and give it a small pump, a little intimidated by his size, even though it’s not fully hard yet. I watch as small beads of precum leak from his head and roll down his shaft. Without a second thought, I lick along the underside of his cock, starting from the base all the way to the tip. I swirl my tongue around the head, lapping up the droplets of precum.

I hear Peter groan as I pull him into my mouth, inch by inch, using my tongue to lick him slowly and hollowing my cheeks to suck him deeper.

I smile to myself as I hear Peter curse and moan above me, I feel his hands in my hair as he caresses my face, urging me to continue.

I lean back and pump him a little more before sucking the head of his cock again.

“Fuck, Y/N,” Peter moans as I start to slowly take in as much of him as possible and pull back. The tip of his cock hits the back of my throat as I take him deeper and deeper. I pump his shaft at the base with my free hand as I begin to feel my panties dampening.

“Y/N, please slow down, I don’t want to cum yet,” Peter practically begs.

I look up at him and smile to myself as I let him go with a pop.

He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to calm himself down.

I take this opportunity to turn my back to him and take off my pants slowly. I bend over more than I have to so that I give him a good view of my ass. I can see his jaw drop in the mirror.

Pffft. He ain’t seen nothing yet.

My jeans join the not-so-well-hidden pile of dirty laundry in the corner. I lift my shirt slowly, especially around my chest, since I want him to see that I’ve “forgotten” my bra at home. I hear a sharp intake of breath as he realizes this. The shirt joins my pants and I’m left Stark™-naked except for my panties. I turn around to face him.

Are human even supposed to be that red?

He has a dumbfounded expression on his face that I’ve never seen before.

I laugh a little as I climb back onto the bed and kiss him.

He kisses me back after recovering from his shock. He flips me over so that I’m on my back.

He attacks my neck before traveling downward, past my exposed breasts leaving a trail of kisses past my stomach.

I moan loudly as he reaches my hips. He kisses all along the band of my panties and kisses my nether lips through the thin fabric.

I whimper as he hooks a finger into the elastic of my panties and pulls them down slowly. He leaves small bites on the inside of my thighs as he passes them. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the sodden article of clothing sail across the room in the general direction of the rest of my clothes. He works his way back up my legs, fingers ghosting the insides of my legs before parting them gently. His left hand grip the top of my right thigh as he uses his hand to spread my lips. I clutch the sheets as he dips a finger into my wet and aroused center. He smiles to me before scooting closer to my crotch, all the while making a “come hither” motion with his finger. His lips meet my other lips as his head comes down.

Within moments, his tongue finds my clit.

Has he done this before?

“I pay attention in sex ed, Y/N,” Peter jokes as my cheeks redden in the realization that I had said it out loud.

He chuckles a little bit before leaning in and kissing my thighs before sucking my clit again.

I moan loudly and clutch the sheets harder. I feel another finger join the first and his other hand moves up to hold my hips in place. I squirm and whimper as his tongue runs over my clit, lapping at the sensitive bundle of nerves. His fingers spread my opening  to give his tongue to my core. I shiver as his tongue moves in and out of my entrance.

“Ohh, fuck Peter…” I moan, willing him to go faster. He pulls his tongue out of me and he moves his two fingers again, thrusting faster than before.

His tongue moves back up to my clit and begins attacking the small nub at the top of my folds.

My moans become more incoherent as he continues to lick, suck, and lap at every single part of my most private area, leaving me a babbling mess.

As my walls begin to clench around his fingers, Peter speeds up his thrusting and ravages my clit harder as he feels me gets closer to the edge until he brings me over the edge. My back arches and my toes curl almost painfully as the immense pleasure of the orgasm wracks my body completely. I see stars as my eyes roll back into my head and a loud, breathy moan escapes my lips.

Peter sucks gently on my clit and slows his thrusting as the waves of euphoria roll over me, further intensifying the pleasure and prolonging my orgasm.

As the pleasure gently fades away, Peter kisses my clit, then kisses a trail up my stomach, stopping at my breasts. He licks each nipple, gently sucking on each one before moving on. He stops at my neck, planting a kiss there before moving his head up so that his eyes are level with mine.

“Do you want to go further?”

“No, Peter, I wanted to stop and talk about multi-variable calculus,” I deadpan, lacing as much sarcasm into my voice as possible.

He smiled devilishly and deadpanned right back, “It just so happened that I needed a little help with my calculus homework, can you help me integrate my natural log?”

I whack him softly with one of the red heart pillows on the bed. “I HATE YOU”

“No you don’t,”

He leans down to kiss me again before reaching over and grabbing a condom from the nightstand.

I laugh as he fails to open it before offering to help. He smiles at me gratefully as I put it on for him. I wrap my arms around his neck to pull him closer and kiss him.

I pull him down to the bed.

“I love you,” he whispers.

“I love you too, Peter,” I say as I guide his cock to my entrance.

I always thought I would be really nervous during my first time. But Peter made it comfortable. Peter slowly moved his hips forward and I gasped, not used to his size.

He’s bigger than I thought.

“Are you okay? Am I hurting you?” Peter asked nervously.

“No, it just feels kinda tight,” I say, trying to ease his nerves.

Peter continues to insert himself carefully. The pain fades away and it begins to feel pleasurable.

I moan a little and clutch Peter’s back as I quietly beg him to go faster.

Peter starts to thrust his hips at a moderately faster speed and I throw my head back and moan loudly, enjoying this new feeling beyond words.

Peter leans forward to kiss my neck making me mewl in pleasure as I move my arms around the back of his neck to pull his hair.

I kiss his neck and Peter groans loudly.

“Keep doing that and I am not going to last much longer,” Peter says as he leaves another hickey on my collar bone. He hastens his movements and starts thrusting harder.

“Maybe I don’t want you to,” I whisper breathily.

Peter straightens up and moves a hand down to my clit and rubs his thumb over it in quick, small circles, pushing me over the edge.

“Peter,” I moan before I see stars for the second time that night. As my walls clenched around his member, I felt Peter also reach his release, groaning loudly and burying his cock deep in my tunnel. His cock twitches and I feel the condom fill up as he releases his seed into me. He lies down, burying his face into the crook of my neck as he tries to slow his breathing. We lay like that for a while, both panting hard and coming down from our orgasms. After a few minutes, he pulls out slowly and kisses my face. I moan as he slides out, and I feel empty when he pulls out completely.

“You okay?” Peter asks.

“Mmm,” I respond, exhausted.

Peter laughs and goes to the bathroom to get rid of his condom. I whine, not wanting him to leave, but am too tired to go after him.

Peter comes back a few minutes later with a warm washcloth. He gently moves my legs to clean then before handing me one of his shirts and to wear.

I smile and put it on before lying back down on the bed and drifting off, murmuring, “I love you,” to Peter.

“Happy birthday, Y/N” is the last thing I hear before my reality fades into pleasant nothingness.

—-

Masterlist: x

alright! *cracks knuckles* let’s talk about klance! i know all these points have been made in other posts but i’m just irritated and want to make my own post lmfao. i don’t understand people who say keith and lance don’t have any chemistry/potential/”romantic” moments…like…are you watching the same show that i’m watching? you don’t have to like the ship, dude, but there is no denying there’s something going on.

lance, your bi is showing.

do i even need to talk about the, “we are a good team” scene? this was ridiculously gay. holy fuck. tender hand holding. EVEN THE WAY KEITH SAYS LANCE’S NAME IS TENDER. they just sit there holding hands the whole time. they could have let go, either one of them could have let go, dude. keith wasn’t helping lance up. he kneeled down next to him and just…fucking held his hand? those soft smiles? lance doing the “fond eyebrow raise”? gay. and i know the purple lighting is from the galra crystal, but like…wow this whole set up was romantic as hell. seriously, sit back and imagine if one of them were a girl. boom, romantic. everyone would see it. so why is it so hard for some of y’all to see it here? not to mention the fact that we never actually saw the supposed “cradling” (i refuse to believe “I cradled you in my arms!” refers to this hand holding. there has to be more. a full on cradle). that was probably so fucking gay. AND THE EPISODE RIGHT AFTER, WHEN LANCE IS IN THE HEALING POD, KEITH BEING AN IMPATIENT LITTLE FUCK, FULL ON POUTING, TAPPING THE POD BECAUSE ALLURA WON’T LET LANCE OUT OF IT YET. EVEN THOUGH SHE SAID “JUST A FEW MORE TICKS.”

like, this boy can’t even fucking wait a few ticks because he just wants to see lance. there is no way to deny that he wants to see lance, talk to him, probably about their bonding moment. i bet he thinks everything is going to be different between him and lance now. 

he’s also the last one to walk away from the pod. *eye emoji* why did they choose to show that? what was the Point? then, when lance comes out of the healing pod, keith gets this precious little smile on his face. he’s happy to see him. looking forward to talking about feelings and shit, most likely.

but! lance instantly flirts with allura and keith just says, “Classic.” he then proceeds to look salty as fuck with his signature broody arm crossing included. this poor boy. you’re killing him lance, you really are.

not to mention the many other times he has appeared jealous when lance is flirting. (”Jealousy, thy name is Keith.”) i’m not posting screencaps of all those moments because i’m so lazy and like i said, all these points have been made in other posts and i got other shit i’m focusing on. 

here it is, the iconic, “We had a bonding moment! I cradled you in my arms!” scene. listen. i honestly can’t even think of a reason why keith would bring this up, unless he has a big fat crush on lance. it just did not fit into the conversation at all. let me type it out for y’all even though you probably don’t need me to. we’ve analyzed this to hell and back already but…

Lance: “Wow. Thanks, everybody. Sounds like the mice did more than you, though.”
Keith: “I punched Sendak!”
Lance: “Yeah, apparently after I emerged from a coma and shot his arm off.”
Keith, looking completely fucking devastated: “We had a bonding moment. I cradled you in my arms!” (his voice CRACKS)

honestly, he looks like he just witnessed his world fall apart around him. #mood

i don’t know about you, but this would not be my reaction unless, like i said, i had a big fat crush on the other person. he looks so betrayed, oh my god. and lance…wow. lance says, “Nooope. Don’t remember, didn’t happen.” now, is it just me or is this totally lance being a little shit about the fact that keith didn’t remember him in the first episode when they’re saving shiro? i bet it is.

alright, now this here, this is my favorite. this screenshot is titled “GAY this is so fucking GAY” in my files because um? their faces? those are very fond and tender expressions. this whole scene was so gay i stg. keith was flirting up a storm with this boy and it was amazing. let’s not forget that the planet lance was on with nyma highkey had the bi flag colors and there was two rainbows in this episode. symbolism, guys. these things mean a lot and are very important in animation. (there’s a lot more symbolism that many people have pointed out, including what i said above but my ass don’t have the time to put them all here)

the flirtation is strong in this one. here’s some more moments (i probably didn’t put them all idk i can’t remember) where keith is either a) flirty or b) looking at lance with that oh so soft expression. he doesn’t really look at any of the other characters like this (definitely not at allura lmfao), at least not that i’ve noticed. correct me if i’m wrong. 

wow keith you’re soooo cool…

a very underappreciated Soft Look.

this whole scene kills me every time, i love everything about it.

PROUD OF LANCE FOR COMING UP WITH A SICK ASS PLAN!

this still haunts me. it haunts all of us. why!!! did!!! he!!! say!!! it!!! like!!! that!!! you can hear the winky face in his voice. the way he says this is equivalent to 100 winky faces. if you don’t think this is blatant flirting, you’re a lost cause.

of course you were. of course. you want his attention. it’s okay, we know, lance.

LOOK AT THAT SMIRK KEITH IS SPORTING!!! anyways, that is the face of someone flirting. i make the same damn face keith makes when i flirt. if one of them were a girl, IT WOULDN’T EVEN BE A QUESTION. IT WOULD BE OBVIOUS FLIRTING AND PEOPLE WOULD SHIP THE HELL OUT OF IT. but no, they’re two boys. dudes bein’ dudes. just guys bein’ bros. wow, what a great bromance.

now, just for shits and giggles, let us compare how keith looks when he’s literally cradling allura in his arms vs. when he’s holding hands with lance.

he deadass looks like this -_- with allura. there’s actually a fucking…slight frown on his face now that i really look at it, oh my god. even when allura removes herself and blushes, he still looks like that. now, wouldn’t you think that, hm…if they wanted it to be known that keith wants to smooch allura, they’d at least put a slight blush on his face to match allura’s or maybe have him appear to be a little flustered? 

he’s gay. i can’t imagine him not being gay. (imo, him being galra is a big metaphor for him being gay. coming to terms with who he is and “coming out” to the other paladins. everything hunk says to him in “The Belly of the Weblum” are common things straight people say to gay people. a lot of people in the fandom seem to agree with this, but maybe we’re all just reaching idk) i just feel like…someone who likes girls would have a different reaction than keith’s when faced with a beautiful girl like princess allura in their arms. yeah, i know, this has already been said. but!!! it’s!!! true!!! all of their “romantic” scenes together were awkward, forced and came right out of nowhere and keith just…had no reaction. compare that to all the faces he’s made at lance. yeah. the difference is ridiculously obvious.

there’s honestly so much more i want to add to this, stuff from the comics and more subtle things (including a screencap of lance’s face in “Escape from Beta Traz” when he’s talking about keith and how he does cool shit. boy had the most fond expression known to man. u know the one), but everything has already been said by someone else. i’ll end it by saying this, again, because i’m really fucking salty: if one of these boys were a girl, there would be ZERO question about the purpose of these interactions. it would all be seen as flirting and romantic. it’s such a common trope. red and blue. fire and ice. they balance each other out. peace the heck out.

anonymous asked:

Hi, I don't know if you're taking prompts but I just read your scene about Andrew being there in Baltimore and it was amazing so I wanted to ask you to write something about Andreil + neck kisses, because I feel like this is a Very Important plot point that was not fully explored. Like maybe Andrew coming to terms with the fact that it's actually his favorite thing, and not knowing how to ask for it? Ugh I just finished rereading the series and I can't get enough of these stupid boys 🦊

(Thank you so muuuuch, and also I totally agree tbh)

He hates the way Neil always pauses to kiss at the hinge of his jaw on the way to his neck. It’s like a check point, the sweet press of a power button, and Neil doesn’t even seem to realize he’s doing it. He kisses with his whole face too, dragging down over Andrew’s bottom lip and chin and throat with his eyes closed, like he’s too in love with the experience to even look.

It’s killing Andrew. It’s stoppering the air in his lungs and giving him stomach ache with how bad he wants it. You like it. I like that you like it.

Andrew hates that he likes it, the vulnerability of that bared neck. It feels like a mistake every time he does it, but it also kind of feels like he’s taken the first shots of the night and he can’t stop, like the more he drinks the thirstier he gets. Neil is such a mistake, but he’s so so easy to make.

Kissing — like this, with the covers pushed down and Andrew on his side with his hand up Neil’s shirt — feels inevitable. He can’t stop pushing up Neil’s springy cowlicks and Neil can’t stop fumbling down to Andrew’s neck and sucking. It’s so humid and nervy-tense between them, like it’s never been, like Neil is singlehandedly dangling Andrew off of a rooftop.

Neil passes his tongue over that root of Andrew’s jaw and Andrew makes a noise so low that it sounds wounded. He just barely keeps his hands from forcing Neil closer, chasing that moment where Neil can’t help himself, circulating between mouth and face and neck before Andrew directs his attention elsewhere. He just wants to stay in that circuit with his hands open and his head tilted back.

Andrew’s fist must go too tight in Neil’s hair because he pulls back frowning, lips red.

“Sorry,” Neil says. “Carried away.” He looks troubled by this, like he’s not used to being carried away by things that aren’t arguments.

“No,” Andrew starts, and then stalls out. His hand is still in Neil’s hair. He doesn’t know how to ask for this; doesn’t even know if he wants to.

“No?” Neil repeats. “Okay.” He leans back and off of Andrew, passing one hand through his own hair and undoing Andrew’s work messing it up.

“I didn’t tell you to stop,” Andrew says, and the way he’s exposed is too much — shirt pushed up in the tousle to pull Neil on top, hard and marked up.

“In my experience, no means stop,” Neil says evenly.

It’s exactly what he wants to hear, he realizes suddenly. Neil finds this humiliating way of giving Andrew what he wants without looking like he’s considered it at all.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What do you think were the best nalu moments in this arc so far?

Hmm~ This is a good question!  I had to go back quite far for this one, but I think you’ll like it!  It’s gonna be a long answer, so let’s get started!

First off, we have Natsu coming back from his year long training session:

I mean, in the entirety of chapter 418 we see just how much Lucy misses Natsu (and Happy too of course), but in this page, you can see how happy she is that he’s back.  She looks almost relieved (not that she wasn’t thriving on her own, but she had a hole in her heart).  Natsu looks ecstatic to see Lucy (we even get a little blush).

Moving on to chapter 419 (don’t worry, I won’t be going through every chapter like this lmao) but OH MY GOD LOOK.  Natsu had no idea how hard Lucy was working and how broken she was losing Aquarius, everyone, and HIM all at once.  I think this is where he truly understood her pain whether he knew all the details or not.

Also, how can we forget how “first chapter” this page is.  It’s almost like Lucy can’t believe it.  He’s back and so is Fairy Tail.

Here, it’s pretty clear that Natsu has learned how much him leaving as well hurt her.  I think this is v important for their relationship…  Which they still have yet to “resolve” though I don’t think Natsu leaving was entirely “selfish”.

I think here Natsu is trying to gain Lucy’s trust again.  To prove himself to her, and honestly I believe that this scene is very intimate between them and the way their relationship is.  Not so much romantically, but their trust in each other.

We also get a LOT of scenes of both Natsu and Lucy reacting like this to one another… 

Hmmm…

Okay, okay I know, I’m nitpicking everything- HOW CAN I PICK JUST A FEW FAVORITES??  But alright, I’m going to get into general, overarching moments that I think are the best and really love!

There is A LOT under this break and there are also spoilers of the latest chapters!!  Please read with caution :)

Keep reading

Did anyone say idiotic fluff prompts?

‘I heard a high pitched whine and ran in to see you crying over a picture of a kitten and a puppy hugging yes i know that is cute but are you okay’
alternatively: ‘I started whining with you’

‘Hey I noticed you were down so here’s a box of kittens don’t ask me where i got them but we gotta return them before sunrise no it wasn’t illegal shhh h’

'Yes I killed this man but he was a bad owner and now his animal is mine and perfectly happy so I don’t see the problem’

'Are you reenacting Bet In It from High School Musical as a way of making this decision?’

'You’ve been wearing gym clothes all day but haven’t moved at all what do you mean its a 'mindset’ no you need to actually move’

'Can you take this seriously what no i don’t care if there’s a dog this is a crime scene’

'It was a normal day until you rolled in blasting the 'maria hee maria ha’ song and I’m so done’

‘If you don’t stop singing ‘Poker Face’ I will make sure you will have no flippin face’

‘Person C playing ‘Pony’ every time Person A and B have a moment of sexual tension’

‘Is that an alligator?!’ ‘Hey, show some manners, his name is Lieutenant Fred!’

‘I made a blanket fort and you can’t come in unless you admit I’m the best and my moves are the funkiest’

‘I know how to settle this; DANCE OFF’

‘Will you stop stroking my hair and whispering ‘my precious’?!”

‘What’s your favorite book?’ ‘Fifty Shades of Gray’ ‘Okay, another question, are you trying to make me shoot you?’ ‘Yes.’

‘Did you seriously learn the book word-by-word and do all possible research just to be able to sass your teacher when he thinks you don’t know anything?’

‘I stole your seat and in retaliation you sat on me’

‘You know, you’re not supposed to EAT THEM ALL AT ONCE, YOU COULD DIE’ ‘Your skin is like a pillow, are you an angel?’ ‘Great, now you’re high’

‘How many coffee’s did you have???’ ‘At least eleven’

‘Help me find my shirt’ ‘You know, as much as I want to…I don’t want to.’

‘Would you stop chatting with the fricking enemy

‘Are you eating a whole jar of Nutella in one sitting?!’ ‘I have problems leave me be’

‘Why am I the only sober one at this party and you’re completely wasted and clumsily flirting with me god at least you won’t remember my blushing’

‘You can’t just use ‘I have problems’’ as an excuse for everything!’

‘Did you just bake 20 fricking breads?’ ‘No…. I named them too, this is Breadly, Demi Loafato, Attila the Bun…’

You should be here

A/N: Inspired by the song “You Should be Here” by Cole Swindell. This is a feels smack. In this story Dean took Amara down with the spirit bomb they made, leaving Sam to raise Dean’s young daughter.

Listen to it here (play the song if you really wanna bawl while reading this)

Sam x Niece!Reader   Dean x Daughter!Reader

Sam felt his strong facade begin to crumble as he watched Dean say his goodbyes to you. At only four years old you didn’t fully understand what was going on but you got the jist of it, your dad was going away and wouldn’t be coming back.

Which was breaking your heart.

Tears were pouring down your face as you clung to Dean begging him not to leave you. Sam looked at Dean and could tell Dean was about to lose it as he held onto you tighter. His face was buried in your hair, breathing in your scent, memorizing you because who knew where his soul would go after he destroyed Amara.

Glancing up at his brother, Dean realized it was time for him to leave. “Go with your uncle Y/N. Sammy’s gonna take care of you.” Dean said while trying to get free of your grip.

“No Daddy.” You cried, digging your hands into his shirt, “Please don’t leave me.”

Keep reading

2

Okay, you see this? These are jacket cover/inside cover of a book called “The Beast Within” written by Serena Valentino, who wrote other Disney books that are so amazing. I purchased her first Disney book in the Germany Pavilion in Epcot a few years ago and have bought every other book of hers since. But lemme tell you why this one is my favorite:

Not only is “Beauty and the Beast” one of my favorite films of all time, but the Beast is one of my favorite characters in any film. And this book makes him seem so much more understandable. It’s written in his perspective and there’s literally a scene where he’s so close to being an actual monster that he goes out to kill Belle after she runs away from him.

Did you hear me?

HE GOES TO KILL BELLE.

Of course, he fights the wolves that attack her because in his mind, he’s like “wait I can redeem my human status still” while the beast side is literally chanting “RIP THE FLESH OPEN AND SPILL HER BLOOD EVERYWHERE ALL OVER THE SNOW COVERED GROUND”.

Let me tell you, this book is so good. And it gives more backstory to Gaston (who is, as you guessed, one of my favorite Disney villains).

If you enjoyed the 2017 version of “Beauty and the Beast”, you’ll enjoy this book. It’s different than the film, but just as good, in my opinion.

Sweet Creature

Words: 7,500

Warnings: Smut

Harry sighed as he peered into the kitchen from his spot by the staircase in the living room. He’d like to be next to Y/N and Gemma right now, but his neighbor had whisked him off into a conversation about gardening that he truly had no interest. Nevertheless, Harry was polite, so he stood patiently and nodded and “mhmm”ed at the appropriate moments. He couldn’t help but let out a wistful sigh as he saw his sister and best friend slip out into the backyard.

As much as he appreciated Anne throwing a party in celebration of his first solo concert, he silently wished he had just gotten a private day in his hometown. Harry knew his friends and family were proud of him. But he was nothing if not humble and a little bit selfish. He so rarely got time at home to see Y/N, and he wished he could actually spend a moment with her now instead of playing host to what felt like the whole village. He’d much rather have been relaxing on the couch watching a rom-com with the girl he could never get enough of.

Just then, his mother swooped in to rescue him with a bright smile and gentle hand on his arm. “Sweetie, would you mind bringing the rest of the chicken out to Robin to grill? And maybe bring him a beer?”

He nodded much too fast for someone being asked to do chores. “Sure, mum.” He kissed her cheek and smiled brightly at their slightly disgruntled neighbor. “Sorry, mate. Talk to you later, yeah?”  

Harry wove his way through the crowd in the house to get to the kitchen. After slamming the refrigerator door shut with his hip, two beers clutched in one hand, he snatched up the last tray of chicken from its spot on the stove. He thanked Barbara from the bakery for opening the door to the back garden for him and offered her a cheeky smile she saw more than nearly anyone else.

Robin stood at the grill next to the deck, laughing and listening to the conversation going on in the chairs nearby. He saw Harry exit the door from the house and quickly waved him over.

“Having fun?” he asked, taking the tray of chicken and leaving Harry’s other hand open to start popping caps on the beer bottles.

Harry shook his head a little and snorted.  “You know how it is. Lots of small talk and cheek squishing.”

“And not getting to see Y/N,” Robin replied knowingly. He chuckled as Harry rolled his eyes before taking a pull from his beer.

“How has she been? I haven’t really talked to her much yet.”

“She’s lovely as always. I think her dad is having a bit of a hard time. You know the 15th anniversary of her mum’s passing is next week. She’s stayed with us the last couple of nights.”

Harry couldn’t help but frown. Y/N’s mum had died of cancer when she was only seven. Her father had been a dear friend of his mother’s, so they’d taken Y/N in when it happened. Her father hadn’t wanted her to see her mother like that, nor did he think he could properly care for her. Harry and Y/N had always been friends, but those four months that she lived with them had given them a bond no one could ever replace. They’d been absolutely attached at the hip their whole lives. To this day, the guest room at the Styles/Twist household was mostly considered Y/N’s and held some of her pictures and personal belongings. She’d long been a member of their family.  “She’s coping okay, right?”

“Why don’t you ask her yourself, nosy?”

One of his only regrets about participating in X Factor and leaving home so young was that he felt like he had abandoned Y/N. She had come to visit him in LA and London a few times and had even joined him on tour, but she always felt obligated to return to Holmes Chapel to make sure her father was cared for. Though they were best friends, they often went months without talking because Harry was just too busy. He hated himself for that.

“Harry! Come sit a mo’ and have a chat?”

He turned to see his cousin Charlotte gesturing to the chair next to her. Robin’s clap to his back was taken as a dismissal as he made his way over.

“Hey there, rockstar. How ya doing?”

Harry settled in the chair and grinned. “Good, good. ‘N you?”

“Wonderful! Kyle just started his new job, so we’ve got a good income now. Not that you’d know anything about that,” she joked and leaned over to playfully nudge his shoulder.

Harry was sure his smile looked more like a grimace. While he may not have been hurting for money, there had certainly been a time when he would skip dinner just to save his mum a little money. He knew as much as anyone how hard it could be.

“Robin! Anne wants to know what’s taking so long with those birds!” Harry perked up at the sound of Y/N’s sweet voice washing over him like a lullaby. He quickly turned to see her leaning out the back door with a bright grin.

“Can’t rush these things, Y/N. At least gotta buy ‘em a drink first, love,” Robin joked. The crowd around him laughed along with Y/N.

“Right, I’ll be sure to tell your wife that!” Her gaze shifted to Harry and she smiled softly at him. He tried to wave her over, but she held up a finger in a “hold on” motion and disappeared back into the house.

“So what is Kyle doing, then?” He continued to make small talk with his cousin Charlotte as Gemma reappeared and took up the last chair on the deck right next to him.

Y/N returned about five minutes later carrying a bowl that Harry quickly determined was filled with fruit.  She stood by him and held the bowl down to offer him a piece, but he shook his head. “Come sit,” he told her instead.

She rolled her eyes at him. “There aren’t anymore chairs, H.”

Just as her hand holding the bowl of fruit started to retreat from him, he quickly grasped around her wrist and tugged her forward. When she stumbled just as he knew she would, he took a firm but gentle grasp of her hips and settled them down on his legs.

“Harry!” she scolded, knowing he’d made a scene. While Harry tended to thrive under the public eye, Y/N often did her best to hide from it. That was the primary reason Harry loved to take the piss out of her. Nevertheless, she shifted back to a more comfortable position on his lap and sat a bit sideways so she could hear the conversations going on. Harry wrapped one arm around her, resting his hand on her opposite thigh to keep her securely in place while the hand nursing a beer rested itself against her knee. He couldn’t help but chuckle as she flinched at the cold bottle just barely touching her skin. She finally went back to eating her assortment of pineapples, strawberries, and grapes as she listened to Charlotte.

“He’s just started work at the pub down the road from our house. The pay isn’t that great, but he’s been making loads in tips,” she finished.

“Where is Kyle, anyway?  I haven’t seen him yet, I don’t think.” Y/N was considered a member of the extended family and had attended every family event for the last 15 years. Since she had stayed in Holmes Chapel, Harry figured she probably knew more about his family these days than he did.

“Oh he’s off on a lad’s weekend in Bristol. His mate is getting married next week.”

“Oh good, that means he’ll be all freed up for when Harry and Y/N over here get married soon,” Gemma teased.

“Gem!” Y/N exclaimed. Harry noticed that her cheeks flushed to a pink very similar to the bath water on his album cover.

He just chuckled and gave her a little squeeze.

“Just saying! You two have that whole agreement anyway where if you’re still single at 28 you’re gonna get married. I hate to say it, Y/N, but you two aren’t getting any younger.  Plus you’re like in love anyway. It’s inevitable,” Gemma defended. She seemed unfazed by Y/N’s embarrassment.  

“Ooh, that just reminded me! Harry, you just have to tell me about that girl you wrote ‘Carolina’ about! That’s far and away my favorite song on the album, and I need to hear more about my future cousin in law!”  Charlotte gushed, looking at Harry with excitement in her eyes.

Harry didn’t miss how Y/N tensed at the mention of the song that he knew she for some reason despised. He hated to admit that it hurt him a little bit. He was proud of “Carolina”, and though he knew his opinion of his artistry was the one that truly counted, he didn’t like the thought of Y/N not liking one of his songs.  His hand slipped from her thigh and rested on the arm of his chair. “Oh, I don’t think she’s your future cousin in law.  Just a girl I met in paradise.”

Y/N quickly scarfed down the few remaining pieces of fruit in her bowl. “Think I’m gonna bring this back inside.   I’ll catch up with you later,” she told him quietly. She didn’t bother to look at him as she stood from her seat on his lap and retreated back into the house.

Gemma couldn’t help but sigh as she watched the exchange unfold. The two of them were too oblivious of the others’ feelings for their own good and were absolutely horrid at communication.

Robin finally finished the last batch of chicken and called everyone inside to make plates of food. If Harry thought the inside of the house had been busy before, it was nothing compared to when all the people that had been outside also made their way in for food. There was hardly room in the house to walk, much less find anyone.  Luckily, Harry was tall enough to see over the majority of the crowd, and he found Y/N sitting next to his mum as they split a plate of food.  

After he’d had his fill, Harry stood off to the side and leaned against the wall as he observed everyone around him. He finally had a moment alone as it seemed that everyone was too busy chewing to make conversation.  

He wasn’t alone for long, however, and he stood up straighter as soon as he saw Y/N making her way over to him.  She didn’t look particularly happy, but he put that down to her current family affairs. Though she tried to not let it show, Harry knew how much the loss of her mother affected her.

When Y/N finally reached him, she wrapped her arms tightly around  his waist and rested her cheek upon his chest.  He was much taller and could tuck her head snugly under his chin as he returned her embrace. “Missed you,” he heard her mumble.

Pushing his upset feelings about her distaste for his song aside, he squeezed her tighter and pressed a kiss to her hair. “Missed yeh, too, love.” His hands took to rubbing her back comfortingly as they stood in their embrace. He knew how much Y/N having her back rubbed soothed her. “Yeh look pretty today.”

Her hair had been curled prettily, her lashes long and full with the help of the mascara she had applied to them. Her outfit had been kept simple with a pink sweater over her flowy white tank that she had paired with jeans and flats. She didn’t try as hard as most did to look pretty, but Harry always thought she was the most beautiful girl in the room.

A rosy blush painted her cheeks as she pulled a little to look at him. “Thank you, bubs. You’re looking mighty handsome today, as well.”

Harry couldn’t help but smile at the nickname. It was the one she had given him when she was six and he was seven, and to this day he’d never heard her use it on anyone else. “Thank ya, love.”

“Harry!” they heard Robin call, and Harry chuckled as Y/N whined quietly and squeezed a little tighter around his waist. “Can you come help me clean the grill real quick?”

Harry left one last parting peck to her forehead before releasing his grip on her and moving out of her arms.  He followed his step dad into the back garden to provide assistance.

“I think now that everyone has full stomachs, they might be heading out soon. Hopefully we won’t have all these stragglers on our hands late tonight,” Robin commented as they went to work scrubbing the burnt bits from the grate.

Harry huffed in response. “Better not. I’d quite like a relaxing night in to be honest.”

Robin nodded. “I know you would, kiddo. You’ll get it, I’m sure.”

All in all, cleaning the grill only took about ten minutes. While they were outside, the two men wandered the yard holding trash bags to pick up garbage that had been left around to minimize the cleaning later. Finally, Anne called Harry in to start saying goodbye to guests as they began to depart just like Robin suspected they would.

When Harry made his way into the house, he saw that Y/N and Gemma had started to pick up the kitchen much as he and Robin had been cleaning the back garden. He saw them occasionally reach for their respective glasses of wine as they put food in containers and cleaned dishes.

Harry continued to play host and made small talk with the guests as they all gave him their closing remarks and good luck wishes. He thanked each of them sincerely and made sure to give an anecdote about their lives as well. Finally, after what felt like hours of talking, hugs, and handshakes, he collapsed onto the couch with the opening titles of The Notebook playing on the telly.

One by one, the family settled in with him. Robin took his usual recliner spot, and Gemma curled up with Dotty and a blanket on the love seat. Harry could hear Y/N fussing with Anne over helping to clean the kitchen.

“Y/N, I will not take ‘no’ for an answer. You go relax a bit. You’ve been picking up after people all day,” he heard his mother scolding and Y/N’s response in the form of an exasperated huff.

“We’ll get it done faster if I help you, Anne. You deserve to relax, too.”

“And I will as soon as I finish this. Now, shoo. Go be lazy for a tick.”

Y/N was still grumbling quietly to herself as she reached the living room and collapsed in a heap next to Harry on the couch. She automatically leaned her head against his arm, wrapping her own around his waist and craning her neck to see the move on the screen.

Harry chuckled. “You’re a snuggly little thing today. Budge up for a sec, love.”

Y/N groaned but lifted back off of him. He didn’t say anything as he moved a throw pillow to rest against the arm of the couch before swinging his legs up to the side and sprawling out across the length of it. With Y/N trapped between him and the back of the couch, she had nowhere to go but to rest against him as he held his arms open for her. After her head was settled against his chest and her hand against his heart, he reached down to pull her knee up and tuck her top leg between his. Once their ankles were comfortably tangled together, he clasped his hands together on her upper arm. “Comfy?” he checked, though he knew she was. Y/N loved to be held almost as much as he did, and this was their favorite cuddling couch. They were practically pros at the movie session cuddling by now.

She nodded against his chest but didn’t verbally respond as she had already gotten herself engrossed in Noah and Allie’s summer romance.

When Anne returned from the kitchen, she settled down with Gemma and pulled her daughter’s feet into her lap.  She took to reading a book while the rest of the family watched the movie on screen. Just as Allie discovered Lon was in town looking for her, Anne felt Gemma’s foot gently nudging at her thigh. Anne looked up at her, and Gemma jabbed her finger in the direction of the couch.

The Notebook was Harry’s all time favorite movie, but he couldn’t seem to be bothered by what was happening on the screen. His hand was wrapped up in Y/N’s hair, softly pulling his fingers through the tresses as he seemed to be humming to her. Her eyes were shut as she rested against him, but Anne doubted she was totally asleep. Unlike Harry, Y/N found it hard to sleep in public settings. Even this house, one she’d practically grown up in, was usually too public for her to sleep aside from in her designated bedroom.  Occasionally she’d see Harry whisper something and Y/N’s lips move in return, but her eyes never once blinked back open.

Finally, when the movie credits started rolling, Robin was the one to shatter their bubble. “Y/N, I hope you were planning on staying here again tonight, because I’m not letting you drive home at this hour. You’re too knackered. Get upstairs, kiddo.”

Y/N yawned and leaned up, Harry’s hands falling from her body in response. She had a few lines on her cheek from the wrinkles in his Harley Davidson tee, and she rubbed gently at her face to relieve the soreness. “Y’ can’t get rid of me that easy, Robin,” she replied, her voice laced with drowsiness. “I see your plan. I’m staying in that guest room forever.”

Anne laughed at her. “That’s your room, anyway, sweetheart. It’s for you to sleep in as long as you want it.”

Harry sat up as well so that Y/N wasn’t pinned behind him on the couch. “I’m pretty tired, too. Think I’m g’na head to bed.”

Anne nodded.  “Alright. Sleep well, love. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Harry climbed the stairs behind Y/N and watched as she went straight to the bathroom to brush her teeth and take her makeup off. He shuffled up beside her to brush his teeth as well and made sure to annoy her by bumping her hip with his to make her move to the side.

“You’re a right pest,” she grumbled, “D’ya know that?”

Harry grinned, mouth full of foamy toothpaste, and pressed a smacking kiss to her cheek.

“Ew, Harry!” she scolded, wetting her hand to wipe the toothpaste from her face.  

He finished his nightly routine long before she did and retreated in to his childhood bedroom to go to bed.  He stripped off his tee and jeans, opting to leave his briefs on just in case Anne came to wake him up for breakfast in the morning. He had just settled into bed and was scrolling through Instagram on his phone when he heard the quietest of knocks sound on  his door.  “Yes, love?”

Y/N just slightly peaked the door open, looking as shy as ever as she stood in an old shirt and her worn out plaid sleep shorts. “Can I come in?”

“’Course ya can,” Harry said, setting his phone down on his nightstand. He shifted a little further to the other side of the bed and sat up a bit as she quietly shut his bedroom door behind her and tiptoed over to his bed.  Instead of sitting cross-legged on top of the comforter as she usually did when she came in for their late night chats, she gently lifted the blankets up and climbed in next to him and settled her head against the other pillow.  She didn’t say anything but started to trace the tattoos adorning his arm as he looked down at her. “Y/N? What’s gotten into yeh today, love?”

She shook her head and didn’t respond, seemingly too caught up in the outline of his rose to properly respond.

“Y/N,” Harry said a little more stern, gently moving his arm away from her as he sat up fully against the headboard.

She shifted in response to his tone, backing up a little and sitting up in the bed.  Her bum rested on her feet as she stared at him solemnly.  “It’s just…”

“What, love?”

Y/N shook her head, features showing that of shame as she looked down at the bed linens instead of him. “Nevermind, I’m being silly.” She started to move to get up from the bed and make her retreat, but she was stopped by Harry’s large hand cupping her cheek.

“Love, if something is truly bothering you,then s’not silly. I can’t make it better if you don’t tell me what it is, hmm?” His hand against her face made it so that it was nearly impossible for her to look away from his piercing green eyes.  

“It’s just…Townes.”

Harry blinked, barely understanding what she meant. “Okay…? What about her?”

She sniffed, and Harry’s heart broke knowing she was struggling so much with what she wanted to say. “It’s stupid and selfish, but I hate knowing that you write all these songs about these girls and the world knows all about them and you thrive on it. You put her name in the bloody song, Harry! Everyone loves it, and I don’t even know her, but I feel like you guys just have this connection now that I was never good enough to have. It’s just…am I not special enough to you for a song? I don’t want you to be so ashamed of me that you won’t tell anyone about me.”

Harry’s mind scrambled as he intook this information. He never imagined this was how she would feel about the song.  Her words hit him like a ton of bricks and suddenly he knew. That feeling in the back of his mind that he’d always tried so hard to keep at bay…she felt it, too. She wouldn’t be so upset if she didn’t.  She loved him, too.  And he’d inadvertently made her feel unwanted. Y/N was all he’d ever wanted whether Harry had known it or not. He knew he had to make her feel better and hurried to grab her hips and pull her closer to him. She started to slip and fumble against the bed so she grabbed onto his shoulders to steady herself. Once her knees had been pulled to either side of his lap, he pushed her hips down to settle her into a straddle above him. “No, love.  That’s not it at all. ‘S that what’s had yeh upset ever since we were out in the yard today? Yeah, I wrote a song about a girl that I barely know. Think people might get a bit tired of me if I wrote them all about you like I’d like to do.”

Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise. “W-what?”

Harry chuckled, pulling her closer by the hips and nuzzling against her neck. “You beautiful, silly girl. You didn’t really think ‘Sweet Creature’ was about Gem, did you? You do have a song, and a very special place in my heart. But that’s just it. You’re too special, love. I’m too selfish to share you with the whole world.”

“W-wait, ‘Sweet Creature is about me?” her eyes watered as she looked at him in awe.

“’Course it is, love. ‘S just that you’re mine and the world can’t have you. Gotta protect yeh from them. Pretty sure I’ve loved you my whole life. But my love for you is just for you, and I don’t wanna share that with the world.”

Y/N seemed to sputter as she struggled to keep up. “You l-love me? Harry, I-I-” She started to get choked up and couldn’t seem to find the words to say.

“I know, love.  I know.” He reached up to hold her face in his hands, lifting his leg up to shift her closer to him. His gaze was locked on her mouth as he inched closer, and Y/N thought she might faint.

Finally, when their foreheads were pressed together and she could feel his warm, minty breath on her tongue, she let her eyes slip closed. One of her hands that had been resting against his shoulder moved up to fist at the back of his curly locks. “I love you, too, bubs.”

Harry felt as if he’d been struck by lightning when he buttoned his mouth firmly to hers. He was sure he could’ve spent his entire life just kissing her like that, but his body immediately craved to have her closer. She gasped when he traced her bottom lip with the tip of his tongue, and he quickly took the opportunity to dive into her mouth. She let out a little whimper that almost made Harry groan aloud when his tongue touched hers. Her fingers tugged gently at the roots of his hair as she pushed herself as closely to him as she possibly could. Their tongues tangled between their mouths for a moment before Harry gave her what she thought would be a reprieve, but she let out another little noise when he took her bottom lip between his teeth and gently sucked. This time he couldn’t control the little growl that bubbled up from the back of his throat and quickly reattached his lips to hers.

Y/N could feel the vague smug smirk adorning his lips through their kiss over the noises he was making her generate.  To retaliate, she quickly disconnected their kiss and trailed her lips down his jaw and neck, finding a nice place to bite down on at the same time that she rolled her hips forward against his. He groaned in pain and pleasure and took her hips back in his hand. “D-Do that again, love.”

“Do what again, Harry?” Y/N teased as she soothed over the bite on the side of his neck with her tongue. She gasped lightly when his hands gripped firmly to her bum and pushed her hips forward again. This time, there was no mistaking the erection straining hard against his briefs. “F-fuck,” he stuttered in her ear as she moved against him once more in a wave, enjoying the feeling of him heavy and warm between her legs.

Y/N lifted her head to kiss him again as she continued to grind against him. While she had him thoroughly distracted with her lips, she quickly moved her hand down between them to palm at him through his underwear. As soon as she pressed down into the bulge, Harry parted from her with a gasp of his own. “Don’t h-have to, love.” The next noise he let out could only be called a moan as she pressed her small hand against him again.

She shook her head and pressed her lips against his in a quick peck. “Want to,” she promised.  

Harry nodded, eyes closed and head leaned back as he just absorbed the feeling of her against him. He caught his bottom lip between his teeth to avoid being too loud as he felt her hand dip inside his underwear and brush against his swollen length.

“Can we get these off?” She tugged at the waistband of his Calvins, eager to get him loose so she could put her mouth on him.

Harry fought to open his eyes and make them focus on her face as he nodded and tapped against her thigh to signal her to move off him.  As soon as she was kneeling at his side, he stuffed his thumbs into the side of the briefs and lifted his bum to shove them down his legs. Once they were successfully discarded, he looked down at himself to see his length twitch slightly against his tummy, the raspberry tip bubbling a little bit of pre-cum against the hairs just under his belly button. He could almost cry it felt to good to be out of the confines of his underwear.

If he thought that felt good, it was nothing compared to what the felt when Y/N leaned down to timidly kitten lick at the little spot he’d dripped on himself. He bit down on the skin of his hand to keep from making a noise too loud as her tongue accidentally brushed against his slit. She looked up at him as if to get permission, and he nodded quickly at her before she looked back down and began to kitten lick at the underside of him as she took his length in her hand. Her tongue brushed against the vein throbbing there before getting caught briefly on the ridge of his head, and already Harry was frustrated by the veil of her hair obscuring his view. He gently brushed it up into his hands to hold on to as she finally took the head of him into her warm, wet mouth.

“Baby, please,” Harry almost whimpered. His balls were starting to hurt because of how turned on he was.  Luckily, she didn’t make him wait any longer and quickly bobbed down on him, her hand following her mouth’s path back up before sliding down again. On her next pass up, she lolled her tongue around his tip like it was a lolly, and his head fell back at the feeling. “Ungh.”

Y/N began to move faster against him, dragging her hand up and down the length of him with her mouth provide sufficient lubrication. She could taste the occasional blurt of pre-cum against her tongue, and it only made her want more. His little groans and gasps spurred her on even more, and she finally reached up his hands to cup at his balls while she had him deep in her mouth.  He groaned a little louder than he should have at the feeling, and she slid her mouth back up for her tongue to swipe at the slit of him just as her thumb gently pressed to the space just behind his sac.  He immediately gasped and reached down to grab at her hand. “N-No, I’ll cum. Ungh. Can’t cum yet. Have to be inside you first. P-Please, oh God, please don’t make me cum.”

She pulled up and swirled her tongue against his head one last time before sliding off him with a little “pop” noise. She pressed kisses against his hips and fern tattoos while she waited for him to catch his breath.

He panted rapidly against her, struggling to keep a quiet level as he tried not to lose his mind. “Fuck, where did you even learn that?” He laughed a little deliriously as she smiled against his hipbone. Finally, Y/N pulled herself up against him and he didn’t waste time pressing his lips to hers. “Are you gonna let me make you feel good?” He asked between kisses.

She whimpered against him and nodded almost imperceptibly. “Please,” she whispered against him, and he took that as his cue to gently flip them over so she was on her back.

“Let’s get this off o’ yeh, yeah?” Harry gently pushed her shirt up her torso, pressing kisses to the skin he exposed along the way. His tongue just briefly caught against her erect nipple before he lifted up to pull the shirt completely from her body. He quickly returned to the area, suckling her right nipple into his mouth as his fingers tweaked her left. She let out a quiet sigh of contentment against him and tangled her fingers in his hair, gently massaging his scalp. After giving her left breast the same attention her right had received, he started kissing back down her torso.  His hands slipped into the waistband of her shorts and pulled them down, leaving her panties in place.

Harry almost groaned at the sight of Y/N’s underwear. Baby pink cotton was darkened slightly between her legs, and he couldn’t help but gently press his tongue against the wet spot she had made. He wasn’t sure if it was the pineapple she’d had earlier in the day or if she just always tasted that sweet, but he immediately knew he had to get a better sense. He dragged his tongue up and pressed it gently against where he knew her clit would be, and she let out a wet gasp at the feeling. “S-stop teasing,” she stuttered, tanking gently against his curly locked entangled between her fingers.

Harry chuckled against her and kissed gently at her hipbone. “Just returning the favor, love.” He gently pulled down her underwear, and his mouth began to water at the pretty pink feast in front of him. “Christ, baby. So beautiful. Are yeh wet for me? I know yeh are.”

She nodded, her bottom lip caught between her teeth as she waited for him to move. Unfortunately, he seemed to be too preoccupied admiring her to actually do anything. “Harry, dammit, do something!” she groaned.

He looked up at her with a smirk. “Now, love. Gotta be patient fo’ me. Can yeh do that? Here, suck my fingers and get them nice and wet fo’ me, please.” He pressed his ring and middle finger against her lips and waited for her to close her eyes and suck them into her mouth. “Good girl.” Just when he was sure she was sufficiently distracted, he dipped down and licked a broad stripe up her sex. She immediately went slack jawed and struggled to inhale. He pressed his fingers against her tongue to remind her of her task at hand, and it took a moment before she wrapped her lips back around him and went back to sucking.

Harry’s tongue gently prodded against her entrance, taking the opportunity to lap up the sweet essence that was nothing but uniquely Y/N. When he had gathered most of her wetness on his tongue, he pushed his tongue into her briefly and made her whimper before removing his fingers from her mouth. “Thank you, love. Doin’ so good for me, aren’t you?” He brought his newly wet fingers down to her entrance and slowly pushed just one in, feeling her wet, spongy warmth wrap tightly around him. He fought against a groan of his own as his tongue gently lapped at her clit.

“Haoh, shit, Harry,” Y/N moaned, making sure to keep her voice low as her grip tightened in his hair. As soon as she pulled slightly against him, he groaned against her and set vibrations all across her clit. She whimpered and tugged a little harder, noticing how Harry’s eyes squeezed tighter shut and he licked at her with a little more enthusiasm. The knowledge that he liked having his hair pulled when he was eating a girl out nearly made Y/N fall apart. “Harry, please, more.”

He was apparently done with the teasing as well and pushed a second finger into her without preamble. He thrust them gently inside of her as his lips wrapped around her clit and sucked, and she turned her head and moaned into the pillow next to her. His fingers began searching her walls for that spot that would drive her mad, and he licked her clit into his mouth before gently shaking his head against her. His fingers brushed against a spongy spot inside her at the same moment and pressed into it. Her legs immediately snapped shut around his head as her muffled moans increased slightly in volume. Harry went back to licking against her for a moment as his fingers thrusted against her spot. Then he alternated between suckling against her and licking, noticing how the variety had her squirming underneath him. When he felt her walls begin to flutter around his fingers, he hooked his fingers against her little spongy bump and rubbed against it and his teeth sunk gently into her clit before giving her a good suck. His tongue ran just once against her clit, and she was falling apart beneath him whispering his name like a mantra. He worked her through her orgasm, only coming up when she tugged a little harsher against his curls due to sensitivity.

Her chest heaved against him as he journeyed up to her neck, pressing gentle kisses against her while she came down. “Yeh good, love?” he checked when he felt her breathing start to slow to a normal pace.

She managed the smallest of laughs against him. “I’m much better than good, bubs. I’d quite like for you to make love to me, though.”

Harry couldn’t help the elated grin that lit up his features, and he pecked gently against her lips twice. “Are you sure you’re still up for it?” When he saw her sparkly-eyed little nod, he couldn’t help but kiss her again. “Then it’d be my pleasure. Do yeh want me to use a rubber?” He knew she’d been on birth control since she was 17, but he’d still give her the option to see what she was more comfortable with.

She shook her head immediately. “Just wanna feel you.”

Harry smiled against her lips. “Never been bare with anyone before.”

Her cheeks got dusted with that rosy pink color he loved, but she didn’t seem as embarrassed as usual by his blunt language. “Me either. ‘M glad we can be each others’ firsts.”

Harry immediately shook his head and reached down to line up against her entrance, smiling at her gasp when his tip brushed against her still-sensitive clit. “Baby, we’re each others’ lasts.” He covered his mouth with hers before she could respond, he pushed inside her.

Y/N certainly hadn’t been with as many people as Harry, but she was no virgin. Despite that, she’d never felt anything quite like Harry inside her. She knew it wasn’t about the lack of a condom covering his length. It was her Harry, the boy she’d run through gardens with as a little kid. The guy she’d shared her first kiss with against a tree when she was eleven years old. She’d always loved him, and she’d never felt closer with anyone in her entire life. The knowledge that she, with her legs wrapped around Harry’s waist as he was buried to the hilt inside her, his lips gently rubbing against her collarbone, could not be any physically closer to him if she tried was enough to make her eyes misty.

“You’re so damn beautiful, Y/N. Swear I’m gonna love yeh forever.” She could barely hear the words uttered against her neck as he made his first careful withdrawal, all the way to the tip, before gently thrusting forward again. He looked up in alarm when he heard her sniffle, but she quickly took his face in her hands and pressed kisses to every bit of skin she could get at.

“I love you, too, bubs. Forever and a day,” she promised. He smiled against her just because she always had to one up him, then he pressed his lips to hers as he began to move a little faster inside her.

She gasped when the length of him brushed against that spot inside her, and her arm tugged him closer by wrapping around his shoulder.

“Shh, baby, gotta stay quiet. Can’ have them comin’ in, can we?” Harry gently hushed her his lips brushed against her temple.

She nodded against him and tried not to cry out as he reached down to grab at one of her knees around his waist. He gently hoisted her leg up into the crook of his arm to provide a new angle in which he could push deeper into her. His other hand braced against the bed to hold himself up as he pushed in all the way and grinded his pelvic bone against her clit. Immediately, her eyes snapped shut and jaw dropped open at the feeling, nails digging into his back as she fought for something to keep her grounded to earth.

Harry continued to thrust a little harder against her, always aiming for her spot, and stopped occasionally for those little grinds he quickly discovered drove her crazy. Her little gasps morphed into whimpers and whisperings of his names and quiet moans, and Harry nearly lost his mind. He began to thrust faster against her with the leverage his arm provided against the mattress, hitching her leg higher up in his arm so it was pressed between their torsos.

“Harry, Harry, ‘m gonna cum, please come back,” Y/N sounded desperate as she tried to hold off her climax. She wanted him close to her when she came, and she ran her nails down his back in an effort to pull him down to her.

“Shh, shh, I’m here, love. S’alright.” Harry immediately dropped her leg down from his arm and moved down to hover just above her. He took one of her hands from his back and intertwined their fingers together above their heads. He felt her legs wrap back around his waist as he pressed his lips against hers and moved a bit faster in an effort to get her to climax. He cursed slightly under his breath when the headboard started to gently tap against the wall in their efforts, and he reached up to hold the top to keep it from making to much noise. “Rub your clit for me. Can yeh do that, love? ‘M gonna make yeh come, I promise.”

The hand of Y/N’s that he wasn’t holding onto snaked into the narrow space between their bodies, and she gasped as soon as her fingers made contact with the nerves. She used her legs around his waist to pull her hips tight to his on every thrust he gave her, meeting him halfway. “Wan’ you to come with me. Please, please do it with me.”

Harry nodded frantically, feeling the coil burning white hot in his belly. “I will, baby, I will. Fuck, I love you so much.” He felt her walls begin to flutter around him, and he knew he was done for. He squeezed her hand tighter in his and thrusted as hard as he could while keeping a hand on the headboard in order to minimize the noise. “Come now, baby. Come with me.” They moaned into each other’s mouths as she clenched around him like a vice in her climax. He didn’t stand a chance as soon as she started to close in on him, and he disconnected his lips from hers to bite down into the spot between her neck and shoulder as he felt the coil in tummy snap. She continued to use her hips to thrust up against him as his orgasm hit full force and he emptied himself inside her. The feeling of rope after rope coating her walls was something she’d never felt before and never wanted to go without again. Finally, when she started to feel that he was spent, she released her legs from around him and reached up to brush a stray curl from where it was matted with sweat against his forehead. Her own forehead and body felt clammy with perspiration, but whether it was hers or his she couldn’t be sure. He shook lightly in her arms as he lowered himself down to her, pressing kisses to every bit of skin he could get at. He went to pull out of her, but she scrambled to put a hand against his hip and push him down into her.

“Not yet,” she begged, “wanna feel you just a little longer.”

Harry smiled, nodding his head as he lifted his head just slightly to kiss her. This kiss was less frantic than the previous ones had been. It was slow and unhurried and full of nothing but love. When Harry felt himself going soft inside her, he gently retracted his pelvis from Y/N’s before pressing kisses across her face. “Thank you for being amazing, love.”

Y/N felt her eyelids beginning to flutter shut from exhaustion but smiled nonetheless. “Thank you for loving me, Harry Styles.” She allowed him to pull the covers up their naked bodies, turning off to the side so that Harry could spoon behind her. She prayed they’d wake up in the morning before Anne came knocking on either of their doors and discovered what had happened before they got a chance to properly explain themselves. But when she felt Harry’s lips press gently to the shell of her ear, his arm around her waist and his whole body warming the back of hers, she decided to live in the moment. She’d worry about tomorrow when it came, because she knew she could handle anything with Harry by her side.




Thanks for reading, guys! I’d love feedback so let me know what you thought!!!

-S

Former Employment

Summary: Professor Stilinski is definitely not expecting to see his favorite porn star among the students of his Human Sexuality class.

Notes: Inspired by this ask. I don’t do power imbalance, so nothing happens until Derek is out of Stiles’ class. Also, while there are mentions of porn, there is no actual smut in this. Sorry. (On AO3)

@nogitsunelichen and @cobrilee – this is probably not what you had in mind, but I wrote it!


When Stiles pushes open the doors to the lecture hall, it’s completely empty. He blinks down at his watch in surprise, and realizes he made the walk across campus faster than he realized. There’s always an adjustment period at the beginning of every semester, where he figures out where his classrooms are and how long it’ll take to get there.

Well, he might as well utilize this time, then. He sits at the desk at the front of the room, and gets back to writing his proposal for a class on the influence of society on gender.

He gradually hears students come in as he works, but he keeps focused, because he knows he has at least another ten minutes before class starts.

But when he hears a student ask, “Hey, are you the professor?” he has to look up, and he begins to wish he’d done it a lot sooner.

Keep reading

People were interested in me doing a thing like this, so here we go! I figured I’d do a short little blurb about each writer, including one or two of my favorite works by them. So, in no real order (like, I literally randomized the list) here are some of the most talented people* whose art I’ve had the pleasure of reading:

*Please note that some of these people haven’t written for bellarke in a while! That doesn’t mean you should pester them about it! Appreciate the heck out of what they have written instead. Cool? Cool.

1. Maria @rebelprincebell AO3

Maria’s written a good variety of longer and shorter fics, and each of them is excellent. (She’s also an amazing human/friend, but that’s more of a side perk.) She’s currently writing Things We Shouldn’t Do which is what everyone wants out of a multi-chap, fake-dating, actors AU. Or for something shorter, check out T.O.P. S.E.C.R.E.T. for some friends-with-benefits/feelings-reveal goodness. And maybe if she loves me she’ll finish Let’s Go to the Mall but it’s nbd.

2. Steph @ofhobbitsandwomen AO3

I read The Squire (multi-chap, medieval AU) when I was pretty new to the fandom, and I’m still completely in awe of it. Steph’s also written a million other amazing bellarke fics, like this fluffy-af youtubers AU (and, recently, some fucking amazing Jyn/Cassian stuff, if you’re into that) so make sure to check out all of her incredible writing.

3. M @ahmren AO3

M’s writing is magical. At the risk of sounding cliche, it wraps you up and carries you to another world. I could survive on nothing but her collection of soulmate AUs for years to come. 

4. Chash @ponyregrets AO3

Chash has written a million and one amazing fics, so obvs read everything she’s written, but one of my particular faves is Some Cheese With That Whine. It gives me all the best-friends-to-lovers feelings. Amazing. Plus she likes all my posts when I’m flailing about ffx <3

5. Katelyn @nathenmiller AO3

Secrets is the only arranged marriage fic you ever need to read. Period. I also love this fluffy lil childhood-friends-meet-up-ten-years-later AU. Plus, on top of all the fantastic writing, K’s one of the incredibly hardworking ladies behind bff. What a girl??

6. Lana @marauders-groupie AO3

Lana’s another one of those writers where I know I’ll like everything she publishes. She’s like, the queen a soulmate AU’s. Her most recent one is here–a cool iteration where you feel whatever pain your soulmate feels. As with all the other authors here, don’t forget to check out all her other stories!

7. Kacka @katchyalater AO3

I discovered Kacka this summer, and her stories saved me from boredom on the countless train rides I was taking across Europe. By which I mean you should just read through everything on her AO3 page, like I did. Everyone loves a good coffee-shop AU, right? Check out Got to Find Those Extra Cups to Fill. She’s a fantastic, inspiring writer and an even lovelier human being.

8. Emily @prosciuttoe AO3

Emily had the nerve to make me cry by posting a canonverse fic, Hold This Heart Steady, today. So do yourself a favor and read that. Other Emily faves include: Your Heart Is Your Own (So Build Me A Home) and Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic (for all your Hogwarts AU needs).

9. Brianna @jvnscass AO3

Bri’s another one of the authors I first read when I joined the fandom! She doesn’t write much bellarke anymore, but it’s all still up on her AO3 along with a ton of quality Jyn/Cassian fics, if that’s your jam!

10. Nai @hiddenpolkadots AO3

Want canon-verse smut? Nai’s got u covered: Mouth Like Heaven, Kisses Like Stars. Or for something on the fluffier/hurtcomfort side, try the light that sits at the bottom of your chest. You literally can’t go wrong. She writes Jily too!

11. Kayla @kay-emm-gee AO3

Kayla’s the first person I ever considered my “favorite fanfic author” and the title still fits, even if I do have about a million “favorite” authors now. Full Circle is an older, post s2, fic of hers, but it’s undeniably still one of my faves. A more recent fave is: this is your heart (can you feel it). These are both canonverse, but she writes amazing modern AUs as well. <3

12. Meghan @bellamyfrecklefaceblake AO3

I feel like Meghan writes the best epic-feelings-reveal scenes?? Some faves are: A Drunk Mind Speaks A Sober Heart and You Won’t Get Rid of Me Without a Fight. I want to live in the feelings at the end of these fics pls and thx. (Also, hope your hand is doing better!!)

13. Mel @caramelkru AO3

Is it getting old for me to keep saying I like everything insert-name-here writes?? I’d stop, except that it’s TRUE. Mel is fantastic. Her last installment in Good Times Gonna Come is so cute I can’t actually stand it. Something In The Air (That Night) is also super good. (She also writes Sethkate and Jyn/Cassian!)

(Okay I’m running out of time for these last few–gotta get to class–so I’ll just do one fic rec from each writer, BUT they’re all such fucking talented authors. Everything they write is amazing.)

14. Katie @dreamingundone AO3

take a running start

15. Jazz @hooksandheroics  AO3

Out of All the Gin Joints

16. S @kinetic-elaboration  AO3

Since There’s No Place To Go

17. Amber @bilexualclarke  AO3

asleep in the bathtub (also, like… her blog title doesn’t lie)

18. Emily @kieraknighted  AO3

Walk With Me

19. Annie @clarkescrusade  AO3

those broken and delicate things

20. Julia @enoughtotemptme  AO3

Aurora Borealis

21. @queenofchildren  AO3

But We Fight For Roses Too

I also asked for some lesser known fic recs, so check these out!

Lay It All On Me by @peetaspikelets

The Thing About Pre-Med by theprincessandtheking

In My Dreams We Are Always Together by andsowemeetagain


OKAY PHEW. I think that’s everything. As a last note, don’t forget to appreciate your favorite authors! A comment or reblog here and there goes a long way. Kudos and likes are lovely, but not quite as tangible as comments and tags.

Happy Reading!

Protection ∾ zach dempsey

Originally posted by kulo-ren

posted 4/16/17

request? yes
   “ Hiiiiii! I have a request if you’re taking them still, a 13rw (I’m a huge fan of your blog btw) where the reader is dating Zach and he figures out that Bryce did something to her (you can decided) and he loses his shit and attacks him. ”

pairing(s): zach x fem!reader , bryce x fem!reader , alex x fem!reader (platonic)

warning(s): mentions of rape 

a/n: i skipped writing the details for the fighting scene because i’m not really good with writing scenes like that, sorry!! but 13rw requests are closed !!
i wrote this in a different perspective because i can’t even imagine doing this in a reader’s pov. it made me get so much anxiety writing it, so sorry if this isn’t as good as my other fics.
oh, and if any of you readers were wondering, i am willing to write girlxgirl or boyxboy. just shoot me a request and i’ll happily accept. i’m sorry that it seems like i always write about fem!readers :(

words: 1169 (hehe)

[not my gif]


It’s been days since Y/N was last seen in Liberty High.

Keep reading

Monster (boyf riends, post Squip)

I’m posting this again without a read more because i was getting people saying they couldn’t see it on mobile. 

Prompt 11: You’re a monster.

Send me a prompt


“Hey,” Michael says, looking at him with a grin. They’re sitting next to each other in front of the tv, controllers in their hands. Jeremy turns to look at Michael who’s facial expression betrays no emotion. Michael tilts his head to the side, opens his mouth and without moving his lips says, “You’re on my side right?”

Jeremy immediately gets the sinking feeling that there’s something terribly wrong but he can’t understand why. “Yeah of course dude.” He swallows, he doesn’t know why it comes out so monotone. “We’re never not gonna be a team.”

The scene changes and he’s in the mall. There’s a hand on his shoulder and he doesn’t have to look to know who it is. What it is, his mind supplies for him. He looks anyway, The Squip is looking down on him, it seems to be larger than it ever was before and suddenly Jeremy can’t move.

You’re nothing without me.

The words echo in his head, it’s the Squip’s voice but the Squip next to him doesn’t seem to be talking. It just stares, eyes boring down into him while putting pressure on the hand still on Jeremy’s shoulder. He want’s to shrug it off, wants to step away, run as far as he can get, but his feet won’t obey him. He’s stuck in place, he can’t even turn his eyes away from the Squip’s gaze.

You’re terrible. Horribly pathetic.

He wants to slump down, look down at his feet avoid those empty eyes, but whatever force is keeping him in place won’t even let him do that. His back is straight and he’s staring right back at the Squip. The pose does nothing to mimic how he’s feeling and that loss of control makes him want to scream.

You have one redeeming factor in your life Jeremy Heere and you don’t deserve it.

He wants to scream. Cry. Yell. Do something to make it stop. He knows what’s coming next and he doesn’t want to hear it, would rather hear anything else in that moment than what the Squip is about to tell him.

Sweet Michael. He stood by your side while you were busy pushing him into it. All alone. Completely ignored. What a wicked way to treat your favorite person Jeremy.

“You… made me do that.” Whatever spell is upon him seems to loosen it’s hold. He can’t move, can’t turn his head away but he can speak. Speak words he doesn’t truly believe, but words nonetheless. “Made me…Michael…” he whimpers. Suddenly the Squip’s grip is gone and he’s no longer towering over Jeremy. It’s like he’s vanished into thin air and not three meters behind where the Squip was just standing is Michael. Jeremy slumps as though his strings have been cut, crashing down on his knees, feeling no pain. “Michael,” his voice is pleading but the expression on Michael’s face doesn’t tell him if he’s heard jeremy. “Michael,” he repeats and his voice is nothing more than a sob, “Michael I’m-” as if the word had been plucked off his tongue it’s gone. He tries again but it’s like he’s choking on it. Michael only watches him, does nothing but look down at where Jeremy is groveling in front of him.

You can’t fix this Jeremy. You were the one who ruined things in the first place and you can’t even do this simple thing.

He can’t tell if there are tears but he knows he’s crying, he knows he feels like his world is being torn apart. Michael hates him, and he can’t even begin to fix it. He’s repeating Michael’s name like a mantra, pleading with him to understand, to pick up on what he’s trying to say.

The next voice that echoes in his head isn’t the Squip’s.

You left me.

Jeremy screams.

I was all alone.

He sobs until his throat is sore.

After everything we’ve been through-

He doesn’t know what he’s saying anymore, only knows he’s in pain. His chest hurts, he’s not sure if he can breathe, not sure if he deserves to.

-and now you can’t even say sorry.

“Jeremy.

You’re a monster Jeremy.

“Jeremy wake up.

He startles awake to a rough shake of his shoulders. He grapples with the arms of whoever’s holding him down, his eyes refuse to focus on whats in front of him and it takes too long for him to return enough to his body to realize where he is and who’s with him.

“Michael…” he whispers hoarsely, and the tears return to him. Or maybe they never left. He looks up at Michael’s wide eyes, filled with fear and concern, and feels himself cry harder. Loud sobs tear out of his throat as he unwillingly relaxes his grip on Michael’s arms. In return Michael pulls away from Jeremy’s shoulders, now secure in the fact that Jeremy won’t hurt either of them. His hands hover uncertainly over Jeremy as if he’s unsure what to do.

“Jeremy…” he whispers softly, his voice is smooth and warm in all the ways Jeremy doesn’t deserve and the sobs that wreck his body become more frantic, until he feels like he can’t catch his breath.

“I’m sorry,” he wails and sees Michael’s own eyes filling with tears, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it wouldn’t let me say it but I’m sorry.” Michael stops hesitating and shifts closer, lays himself down next to Jeremy, so that they’re facing each other.

“I know,” he whispers, not trusting his voice, “I know you’re sorry, I hear you, I forgive you Jeremy.” He lets out a quiet sh sound and reaches up to stroke Jeremy’s hair and presses a kiss on top of his forehead. “You’ve already said you’re sorry, and I’ve already forgiven you, Jer. We’re good,” he reminds. He hushes softly when Jeremy starts to hiccup and forces his arm under Jeremy’s body so he can pull the other close. Jeremy responds by clutching the front of Michael’s pajama t-shirt and pushing closer so that he can nuzzle into Michael’s neck. His entire body is trembling with emotion and he’s still sniffling forcefully, but the sobs have stopped and he’s breathing okay now. Michael will take what he can get.

“I’m sorry…” Jeremy repeats again, his voice barely a whimper and Michael can feel his heart threatening to shatter. He swallows down the lump of emotion that swells up in his throat and only squeezes Jeremy’s body tighter.

“You’re forgiven,” he whispers, “always.”

Full Esquire Interview - CHRIS EVANS IS READY TO FIGHT

“HIS SUCCESS AS CAPTAIN AMERICA HAS MADE CHRIS EVANS ONE OF HOLLYWOOD’S SURE THINGS, WHICH MEANS HE CAN DO WHATEVER HE WANTS WITH HIS FREE TIME. SO WHY JUMP OUT OF AIRPLANES AND GET INTO IT WITH DAVID DUKE?

BY MAXIMILLIAN POTTERMAR 15, 2017


The Canadian commandos are the first to jump. Our plane reaches an altitude of about eight thousand feet; the back door opens. Although it’s a warm winter day below in rural southern California, up here, not so much. In whooshes freezing air and the cold reality that this is actually happening. Out drop the eight commandos, all in black-and-red camouflage, one after the other. For them it’s a training exercise, and Jesus, these crazy bastards are stoked. The last Canuck to exit into the nothingness is a freakishly tall stud with a crew cut and a handlebar mustache; just before he leaps, he flashes a smile our way. Yeah, yeah, we get it: You’re a badass.

Moments later, the plane’s at ten thousand feet, and the next to go are a Middle Eastern couple in their late thirties. These two can’t wait. They are ecstatic. Skydiving is clearly a thing for them. Why? I can’t help thinking. Is it like foreplay? Do they rush off to the car after landing and get it on in the parking lot? They give us the thumbs-up and they’re gone.

Just like that, we’re at 12,500 feet and it’s our turn. Me and Chris Evans, recognized throughout the universe as the star of the Marvel-comic-book-inspired Captain America and Avengers movies. The five films in the series, which began in 2011 with Captain America: The First Avenger, have grossed more than $4 billion.

The two of us, plus four crew members, are the only ones left in the back of the plane. Over the loud drone of the twin propellers, one of the crew members shouts, "Okay, who’s going first?”

Evans and I are seated on benches opposite each other. Neither of us answers. I look at him; he looks at me. I feel like I’ve swallowed a live rat. Evans is over there, all Captain America cool, smiling away.

While we were waiting to board the plane, Evans told me that as he lay in bed the night before, “I started exploring the sensation of ‘What if the chute doesn’t open?’. . .”

Oh, did you now?

“. . .Those last minutes where you know.” As in you know you’re going to fatally splat. “You’re not gonna pass out; you’re gonna be wide awake. So what? Do I close my eyes? Hopefully, it would be quick. Lights out. I fucking hope it would be quick. And then I was like, if you’re gonna do it, let’s just pretend there is no way this is going to go wrong. Just really embrace it and jump out of that plane with gusto.” Evans also shared that he’d looked up the rate of skydiving fatalities. “It’s, like, 0.006 fatalities per one thousand jumps. So I figure our odds are pretty good.”

Again the crew member shouts, “Who’s going first?”

Again I look at Evans; again he looks at me. The rat is running circles in my belly.

I look at Evans; he looks at me.

Another crew member asks, “So whose idea was this, anyway?”


That’s an excellent question.

I ask Evans the same thing when we first meet, the evening before our jump, at his house. He lives atop the Hollywood Hills, in a modern-contemporary ranch in the center of a Japanese-style garden. The place has the vibe of an L.A. meditation retreat—there’s even a little Buddha statue on the front step.

The dude who opens the front door is in jeans, a T-shirt, and Nikes; he has on a black ball cap with the NASA logo, and his beard is substantial enough that for a second it’s hard to be sure this is the same guy who plays the baby-faced superhero. Our handshake in the doorway is interrupted when his dog rockets toward my crotch. Evans is sorry about that.

We do the small-talk thing. Evans is from a suburb of Boston, one of four kids raised by Dad, a dentist, and Mom, who ran a community theater. The point is, he’s a Patriots fan, and with Super Bowl LI, between the Pats and the Falcons, just a few days away at the time, it’s about the only thing on his mind. You bet your Sam Adams–guzzling ass he’s going to the game in Houston. “Oh my God,” he says, doing a little dance. “I can’t believe it’s this weekend.”

Like any self-respecting Pats fan, Evans is super-wicked pissed at NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.

Evans won’t be rolling to SB LI with a posse of Beantown-to-Hollywood A-listers like Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, and Ben Affleck. For the record, he’s never met Damon, and his only interaction with Wahlberg was a couple years ago at a Patriots event. Evans has, however, humiliated himself in front of Affleck.

Around 2006, Evans met with Affleck to talk about Gone Baby Gone, which Affleck was directing. Evans was walking down a hallway, looking for the room where they were supposed to meet. Walking by an open office, he heard Affleck, in that thick Boston accent of his, shout, “There he is!” (Evans does a perfect Affleck impersonation.)

By then, Evans had hit the big time for his turn as the Human Torch, Johnny Storm, in 2005’s Fantastic Four, but he still got starstruck. As he tells it, “First thing I say to him: 'Am I going to be okay where I parked?’ He was like, 'Where did you park?’ I said, 'At a meter.’ And he was like, 'Did you put money in the meter?’ And I said, 'Yep.’ And he says, 'Well, I think you’ll be okay.’ I was like, this is off to a great fucking start.” Stating the obvious here: Evans did not get the part.

No, Evans will be heading to the Super Bowl with his brother and three of his closest buddies. Like any self-respecting Pats fan, Evans is super-wicked pissed at NFL commissioner Roger Goodell for imposing that suspension on Tom Brady for Deflategate. Grabbing two beers from a fridge that’s otherwise basically empty, Evans says, “I just want to see Goodell hand the trophy to Brady. Goodell. Piece of shit.”

In Evans’s living room, there’s not a single hint of his Captain Americaness. Earth tones, tables that appear to be made of reclaimed wood. Open. Uncluttered. Glass doors open onto a backyard with a stunning view of the Hills. Evans stretches out on one of two couches. I take the other and ask, “Just whose idea was it to jump?” Since we both know whose idea it wasn’t, we both know that what I’m really asking is Why? Why, dude, do you want to jump (with me) from a goddamn airplane? “Yeah,” he says, popping open his beer, “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Settling in on the couch, he groans. Evans explains that he’s hurting all over because he just started his workout routine the day before to get in shape for the next two Captain America films. The movies will be shot back to back beginning in April. After that, no more red- white-and-blue costume for the thirty-five-year-old. He will have fulfilled his contract.

“Yeah,” he says, popping open his beer, “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Back in 2010, Marvel presented Evans with a nine-picture deal. He insisted he’d sign on for no more than six. Some family members thought he was nuts to dial back such a secure and lucrative gig. Evans saw it differently.

It takes five months to shoot a Marvel movie, and when you tack on the promotional obligations for each one, well, shit, man. Evans knew that for as long as he was bound to Captain America, he would have little time to take on other projects. He wanted to direct, he wanted to play other characters—roles that were more human—like the lead in Gifted, which will hit theaters this month. The script had brought him to tears. Evans managed to squeeze the movie in between Captain America and Avengers films.

FOX Searchlight

In Gifted, Evans stars as Frank Adler. You don’t get much more human than Adler, a grease-under-his-nails boat-engine mechanic living the bachelor life in Florida. After a series of tragic circumstances, Adler becomes a surrogate father to his niece, Mary, a first-grader with the IQ of Einstein. He recognizes that Mary is a little genius, and he does his best to prevent anyone else from noticing. Given the aforementioned circumstances, Adler has witnessed what can happen when a kid with a brilliant mind is pushed too hard too quickly. Then along comes Mary’s teacher. She discovers the child’s gift, and a Kramer vs. Kramer–esque drama ensues.

During a moment in the film when things aren’t going Adler’s way, he sarcastically refers to himself as a “fucking hero.” Evans says the line didn’t lead him to make comparisons between superhero Steve Rogers (aka Captain America) and Everyman hero Frank Adler. But now that you mention it . . . 

“With Steve Rogers,” Evans says, “even though you’re on a giant movie with a huge budget and strange costumes, you’re still on a hunt for the truth of the character.” That said, “with Adler, it’s nice to play someone relatable. I think Julianne Moore said, 'The audience doesn’t come to see you; they come to see themselves.’ Adler is someone you can hold up as a mirror for someone in the audience. They’ll be able to far more easily identify with Frank Adler than Steve Rogers.”

Dodger. That’s the name of Evans’s dog, the one who headbutted my nuts and has since done a marvelous job of making amends by nuzzling against me on the couch. Evans got him while he was filming Gifted; one of the last scenes was shot in an animal shelter in Georgia. Evans had wanted a dog ever since his last pooch died in 2012. Then he found himself walking the aisles of this pound, and there was this mixed-breed boxer, wagging his tail and looking like he belonged with Evans.

Dodger is not exactly a name you’d think a die-hard Boston sports fan would pick. His boys from back home have given him a ton of shit over it. But he has not abandoned his Red Sox for the L.A. team. As a kid, he loved the Disney animated movie Oliver & Company, and his favorite character was Dodger. Anticipating the grief he was going to get from his pals, Evans considered other names. “You could name your dog Doorknob,” he says, “and in a month he’s fucking Doorknob.” Evans’s mom convinced him to go with his gut.

Right around when Evans was wrapping Gifted and heading back to L.A. with Dodger, the 2016 presidential campaign was still in that phase when no one, including the actor—a Hillary Clinton supporter—thought Trump had a shot. He still can’t believe Trump won.

“I feel rage,” he says. “I feel fury. It’s unbelievable. People were just so desperate to hear someone say that someone is to blame. They were just so happy to hear that someone was angry. Hear someone say that Washington sucks. They just want something new without actually understanding. I mean, guys like Steve Bannon—Steve Bannon!—this man has no place in politics.”

Evans has made, and continues to make, his political views known on Twitter. He tweeted that Trump ought to “stop energizing lies,” and he recently ended up in a heated Twitter debate with former KKK leader David Duke over Trump’s pick of Jeff Sessions for attorney general. Duke baselessly accused Evans of being anti-Semitic; Evans encouraged Duke to try love: “It’s stronger than hate. It unites us. I promise it’s in you under the anger and fear.” Making political statements and engaging in such public exchanges is a rather risky thing for the star of Captain America to do. Yes, advisors have said as much to him. “Look, I’m in a business where you’ve got to sell tickets,” he says. “But, my God, I would not be able to look at myself in the mirror if I felt strongly about something and didn’t speak up. I think it’s about how you speak up. We’re allowed to disagree. If I state my case and people don’t want to go see my movies as a result, I’m okay with that.”

Trump. Bannon. Politics. Now Evans is animated. He gets off the couch, walks out onto his porch, and lights a cigarette. “Some people say, 'Don’t you see what’s happening? It’s time to yell,' ” Evans says. “Yeah, I see it, and it’s time for calm. Because not everyone who voted for Trump is going to be some horrible bigot. There are a lot of people in that middle; those are the people you can’t lose your credibility with. If you’re trying to change minds, by spewing too much rhetoric you can easily become white noise.”


Evans has a pretty remarkable “How I got to Hollywood” story.

During his junior year of high school, he knew he wanted to act. He was doing it a lot. In school. At his mom’s theater. He loved it. “When you’re doing a play at thirteen years old and have opening night? None of my friends had opening nights. 'I can’t have a sleepover, guys; I have an opening night tonight.' ”

That same year, he did a two-man play. For all of the twenty-plus plays Evans had done up to that point, preparation meant going home, memorizing lines, and doing a few run-throughs with the cast. However, for this play, Fallen Star, he and his costar would rehearse by running dialogue with each other. Hour upon hour, night after night.

Fallen Star is about two friends, one of whom has just died. As the play opens, one of the characters comes home after the funeral to find his dead friend’s ghost. Evans was the ghost. Waiting backstage on opening night, he knew he didn’t have every line memorized, but he had the essence and emotion of the play down. Onstage, he remembers, “I was saying the lines not because they were memorized but because the play was in me. I was believing what I was saying.”

He was hooked. He wanted to do more of this kind of acting—real acting. He wanted to do films, in which the camera was right on him and he could just be the character, rather than theater, in which an actor must perform to the back of the room.

A family friend who was a television actor advised Evans that if he wanted to go to Hollywood, he needed an agent. Toward the end of his junior year, he had a ballsy request for his parents: If he found an internship with a casting agent in New York City, would they allow him to live there and cover the rent? They agreed. Evans landed a gig with Bonnie Finnegan, who was then working on the television show Spin City.

“I just fucked off. I lost my virginity that year. 1999 was one of the best years of my life.” Until it wasn’t.

Evans chose to intern with a casting agent because he figured he had more of a chance to interact with other agents trying to get auditions for their clients.

The kid was sixteen years old.

Finnegan put Evans on the phone; his responsibilities included setting up appointments for auditions. By the end of the summer, he picked the three agents he had the best rapport with and asked each of them to give him a five-minute audition. All three said yes. After seeing his audition, all three were interested.

Evans went with the one Finnegan recommended, Bret Adams, who told Evans to return to New York for auditions in January, television pilot season. Back home, Evans doubled up on a few classes the first semester of his senior year, graduated early, and went back to New York in January. He got the same shithole apartment in Brooklyn and the same internship with Finnegan. He landed a part on the pilot Opposite Sex. Even better, the show got picked up and would start shooting in L.A. that fall.

“I know I’m going to L.A. in August,” Evans says, recalling that period. “So I go home and that spring I would wake up around noon, saunter into high school just to see my buddies, and we’d go get high in the parking lot. I just fucked off. I lost my virginity that year. 1999 was one of the best years of my life.” Until it wasn’t.

He wasn’t in L.A. for even a month when he got a call from home. His parents were divorcing. Evans never saw it coming.

Family and love and the struggles therein are part of what attracted Evans to Gifted.

“In my own life, I have a deep connection with my family and the value of those bonds,” he says. “I’ve always loved stories about people who put their families before themselves. It’s such a noble endeavor. You can’t choose your family, as opposed to friends. Especially in L.A. You really get to see how friendships are put to the test; it stirs everyone’s egos. But if something goes south with a friend, you have the option to say we’re not friends anymore. Your family—that’s your family. Trying to make that system work and trying to make it not just functional but actually enjoyable is a really challenging endeavor, and that’s certainly how it is with my family.”


the plane, a decision is made.

“I want to see you jump first,” Evans shouts my way.

Of course he does.

Like any respectable and legal skydiving center, Skydive Perris, which is providing us with this “experience,” doesn’t just strap a chute on your back. First, you go to a room for a period of instruction. Then you go to another room, where you sign away your rights.

You may be wondering how the star of a billion-dollar franchise with two pictures to shoot gets clearance to jump from an airplane—never mind the low rate of fatalities, as Evans has presented it. So am I.

“Well, they give you all these crazy insurance policies, but even if I die, what are they going to do? Sue my family? They’d probably cast some new guy at a cheaper price and save some money.”

Thinking the answer is almost certainly going to be no, I ask Evans if he’s ever gone skydiving before. Turns out he has, with an ex-girlfriend. Turns out that ex-girlfriend is now married to Justin Timberlake. Evans and Jessica Biel dated off and on from 2001 to 2006. They took the leap together when Biel hatched the idea for one Valentine’s Day. According to media accounts, Evans was recently dating his Gifted costar Jenny Slate, who plays the teacher. “Yeah,” he says, “but I’m steering clear of those questions.” You can almost feel his heart pinch.

“There’s a certain shared life experience that is tough for someone else who’s not in this industry to kind of wrap their head around.”

We end up broadly discussing the unique challenges an international star like Evans faces when it comes to dating, specifically the trust factor. Evans supposes that’s why so many actors date other actors: “There’s a certain shared life experience that is tough for someone else who’s not in this industry to kind of wrap their head around,” he says. “Letting someone go to work with someone for three months and they won’t see them. It really, it certainly puts the relationship to the test.”

In Gifted, there’s a moment when Slate’s character asks Adler what his greatest fear is. Frank Adler’s greatest fear is that he’ll ruin his niece’s life. Evans’s greatest fear is having regrets.

“Like always kind of wanting to be there as opposed to here. I think I’m worried all of a sudden I’ll get old and have regrets, realize that I’ve not cultivated enough of an appreciation for the now and surrendering to the present moment.”

Evans’s musings have something to do with the fact that he has been reading The Surrender Experiment. “It’s about the basic notion that we are only in a good mood when things are going our way,” he says. “The truth is, life is going to unfold as it’s going to unfold regardless of your input. If you are an active participant in that awareness, life kind of washes over you, good or bad. You kind of become Teflon a little bit to the struggles that we self-inflict.”

He continues: “Our conscious minds are very spread out. We worry about the past. We worry about the future. We label. And all of that stuff just makes us very separate. What I’m trying to do is just quiet it down. Put that brain down from time to time and hope those periods of quiet and stillness get longer. When you do that, what rises from the mist is a kind of surrendering. You’re more connected as opposed to being separate. A lot of the questions about destiny or fate or purpose or any of that stuff—it’s not like you get answers. You just realize you didn’t need the questions.”

This here—this stuff about surrendering, letting life unfold, taking the leap—this is why he wanted to go skydiving. It’s why that sixteen-year-old took the leap and did the summer in New York; it’s why he took the leap and turned down the nine-picture deal; it’s why he got Dodger. Surrender. Take the leap.

And so I go first.

Oh, one important detail: Novice jumpers like Evans and me, we don’t jump solo. Thank God. Each of us is doing a tandem jump. Each of us is strapped with our back to a professional jumper’s front. I’m strapped to a forty-four-year-old dude named Paul. Considering what’s about to happen, I figure I should know a little something about Paul. He tells me he used to own a bar in Chicago. Evans is strapped to a young woman named Sam, who looks to be twenty-something. She’s got a purplish-pink streak in her black hair and says things like “badass.” In fact, Sam introduced herself  by saying, “I’m Sam, but you can call me Badass.”

At the plane’s open door, my mind goes to my wife and two teenage sons, to those I love, and to the texts I just sent in case my chute fails. Then Paul and I—well, really mostly Paul—rock gently back and forth to build momentum to push away from the plane, to push away from all that seems sane.

Three.

Two.

One.

Holy fuck.

HOLY FUCK. This is what I scream as we free-fall from 12,500 feet, at more than a hundred miles an hour, toward the earth. Which I cannot take my eyes off of. I think about nothing. Not living. Not dying. Nothing. I simply feel . . . I have let go.

Suddenly, it all stops. I’m jerked up. Paul has pulled the chute, and it does indeed open. This is fantastic, because it means we have a much better chance of not dying. But it’s also kind of a bummer. I had let go. Of everything. I had chosen to play those odds Evans had talked about. I had embraced jumping and letting life unfold.

Now I had been jerked back. I would land. Back on the earth I had been so high above and from which I had been so far removed. Back in all of it.

Once I’m on the ground, safe and in one piece, a staffer runs over and asks how I feel. I say, “I feel like Captain America.”

The staffer runs over and asks Evans the same question. He says he feels great. Then he’s asked another question: What was your favorite part?

“Jumping out,” he says. “Jumping out is always a real thrill.”


This article appears in the April '17 issue of Esquire.

Goth and Identity

So its been a while since i last blogged about goth, but sure enough i have discovered something within the subculture that has again left me torn between multiple sides. I’m talking about issues pertaining to identity. Identity is something very personal to each and every individual and it seems that a lot of people are again choosing sides when it comes to identity and how goths identify with the subculture.

Today i want to discuss these sides and where i stand between them. I also want to discuss some of the good and bad of having each of these minds sets about identity.

To begin, i want to discuss the goths who try too hard. So you’re one of us who really enjoys and cares about the subculture. You love the music, you also might be really into the fashion and it shows. But sometimes you might go overboard. I’m talking about the goths who get so caught up in being goth and proving just how goth they are that they almost miss the point of it. They let goth dictate their lives so much that they sometimes suppress parts of themselves that they feel make them less goth. This is not a good way to be. Of course there are goths out there that naturally love goth so much that it seems like they go out of their way to express it, and that’s fine. Its the goths that force themselves into tiny boxes and actually go out of their way to express it who are in trouble.

Say for instance you like goth music but Bauhaus isn’t really your taste, but you feel pressure to listen to them and make yourself like them because you think that it will make you more goth or that other goths will dislike you if you don’t. This is toxic and the only one you’re hurting is you. You don’t need to like every goth band just like you don’t need to backcomb your hair or wear authentic winklepickers to be goth. This is where people let goth get in the way of their own identities. Sure in order to be goth, you should probably know certain bands and care about the subculture, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop watching Steven Universe or throw away all your unicorn plushies just because those things aren’t stereotypically goth.

Goth is a label for people to identify with. Its not meant to rule your entire life. Ive said it before and I’ll say it again goths don’t like the things they like because they’re goth, they are goth because they naturally like those things. This does not mean you have to abandon all the other things you like just because those other things aren’t goth, this also means that you don’t have to like every aspect of the subculture to be a part of it.

Now moving on to another side of the subculture that has sort of a different way of looking at goth and identity, I’m going to call these people the “Goth is Goth type” These are the goths who believe that goth is simply a one word label and that substyles of goth are pointless or negative.

Now if you’ve been in the subculture for a while you probably already know that goth has multiple substyles and these substyles didn’t really start popping up until after the 80′s. Before then there was just goth and all it took to be goth was listening to goth music. So its understandable that most of these “Goth is Goth types” are elder goths who were around before goth started breaking off into substyles.

Many of these “Goth is Goth types” argue that substyles are nothing more than superficial fashion genres and that substyles automatically restrict you to a little box. What they mean when they say “goth is goth” is that it doesn’t matter how you dress, if you’re goth you’re goth and you shouldn’t let a substyle get in the way and dictate how you should express yourself through goth. And to an extent, i do understand this. I do understand where these goths are coming from. But i don’t think these goths are really taking the time to analyze it even further.

There are goths out there that dress in multiple substyles but there are goths out there that dress in only one or two. And some of these goths dress in a particular style, not simply for superficial reasons but because that style actually reflects their own identity. For example, there are some goths who call themselves Victorian goths and dress in nothing but Victorian goth fashion. Many of these goths actually have interests rooted in the Victorian era. Their favorite past times might be visiting Victorian themed exhibits at the museum and having Victorian inspired tea parties. So for them, Victorian goth just best reflects their personal tastes and identities. So you might think that by telling a goth that they shouldn’t limit themselves to identifying with a particular style is helping them to better express their identities,but it’s actually doing the opposite. For many goths, it’s more than just a substyle, it’s almost it’s own mini subculture that people can identify with that’s still a part of goth.

Not everyone feels like they need to put themselves into boxes or identify with one thing in particular but some do. Some take comfort in it. Lets also not forget that not every goth is neurotypical. Some goths may have mental illness and some may take comfort in compartmentalizing things. It might help them to break goth down into substyles and put them into neat little boxes that they can identify with.

Also breaking goth down into even smaller subgroups within the subculture is not always a bad thing. Some goths may argue that having subgroups is negative because some goths are only befriending other goths of a particular substyle instead of making friends with goths of all types and this is true to an extent. It is very important that we put certain differences aside and make friends with all goths, BUT sometimes its just easier and less stressful to make friends with goths that dress like you. Why? Because you already know that you probably have more than one thing in common. Sure it would be great if a romantic goth made friends with a cyber goth but if their tastes are totally different then they may have trouble attending clubs together or hanging out because their hobbies and music tastes just clash too much.

So for the most part how goths identify with the subculture really is subjective and not as black and white as some goths like to think. Whether you choose to dress goth, listen to every goth band or experiment with substyles, its important to respect everyone and create a balance so you aren’t letting goth dictate who you are. Its okay to care about goth and express it in every way possible but only if that’s what you really want to do and you aren’t sacrificing other parts of yourself to do it. Its also okay to enjoy non goth things and express yourself through specific substyles that you enjoy. Yes, you should make friends with goths of all types but its important to remember that you choose your friends and if you are more comfortable with making goth friends who dress and act similar to you that’s fine, the only one who should have a say on the friends you make is you.

The bottom line is everyone identifies with goth a little differently and that’s okay as long as you respect others and don’t let it change who you are. Don’t let goth or anyone in the subculture dictate your life or how you choose to express yourself. Self identity is important and you should never let goth change it.