Oh god, this couldn’t be happening. Not yet. They had just gotten married 3 months ago and they used protection. Wolfgang had made it clear that he didn’t want kids, at least not yet anyway.
Even though it was typical for a woman in India to start having kids right after she marries, things were different for her. For one she wasn’t in India anymore. She was in Berlin and her situation was entirely different. Of course, she would never give up her culture and beliefs but right now just wasn’t a good time for her to be pregnant.
Yet here she was, staring down at the white stick tainted with two pink lines. Kala was officially freaking out. She slid down the side of their bed onto the floor and buried her face in her knees, letting her tears flow. She didn’t know how long she sat there before she heard the front door open and a wave of panic flooded within her.
Wolfgang was home. Shit. Kala quickly got up and scrambled into the bathroom, locking the door. This would buy her a little to compose herself before she faced him.
“Kala?” Wolfgang called out from the living room.
Kala cleared her throat and tried to sound as normal as possible. “I’m in the bathroom.”
The quiet padding of footsteps sounded throughout the small loft and then Kala heard Wolfgang’s voice from the other side of the bathroom door. “Hey, are you alright?”
“Yeah,” Kala’s voice came out strangled and she swallowed and cleared her throat again before continuing. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure? You’ve felt sick all day.” Wolfgang knew because he could feel it too.
“Yeah I am just… I just..” Kala looked around the small bathroom in hopes that something would inspire a lie but came up with a whole lot of nothing.
Wolfgang tried to open the door and became annoyed when the doorknob jiggled but the lock didn’t budge. “Kala, let me in.”
“No I’ll be out in a minute.” She knew that Wolfgang would have no trouble picking the lock if he really wanted to come in. And much to her dismay, he did.
“Hey,” Wolfgang walked inside the bathroom where she stood smack in the looking like a deer caught in headlights. He frowned when he noticed her swollen red eyes and the tear stains on her cheeks. “What’s wrong?” He brushed away a stray tear with his thumb and rested his other hand on the small of her back.
“You don’t want to know.” Kala shrugged and leaned forward to rest her forehead on his shoulder. “If I asked, then I want to know.” Even if she couldn’t see his face, she imagined him rolling his eyes as he took her into his arms. One hand cupped the back of her neck and the other continued to rest on her lower back.
“Please don’t be angry.” Kala whispered, feeling a fresh batch of tears begin to pool behind her lids.
“Okay…” Wolfgang replied cautiously, giving her a soft squeeze.
“I’m pregnant.” Kala murmured so quietly into his shoulder Wolfgang barely caught it. But he did. And in that instant his entire body froze.
Pregnant. As in a baby in side of her. As in a living, breathing human being that he was partially responsible for creating.
Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.
“Wolfgang?” Kala’s voice sounded distant as he took a step back, releasing her from his hold. The walls were suddenly closing in on him and he couldn’t breathe.
He had to leave. He had to get out.
“Where are you going?” Kala called after him when he stepped back and exited the bathroom, the panic clear in her voice.
Wolfgang didn’t reply. He just stumbled through their bedroom, past their small living room, and to the front door.
“Wolfgang, stop.” Kala’s pleaded, following him to the entrance of their loft.
Wolfgang didn’t turn back as he stepped out and quickly descended down the small steps and onto the side walk. He didn’t care that the rain was coming down hard and that he didn’t have his jacket anymore.
He knew by all means and purposes that he wasn’t good enough for Kala. She was innocent and full of life. He had seen the worst of life and had done things that he wasn’t proud of. He didn’t deserve her and he didn’t deserve for her to bear his child.
An innocent child didn’t deserve him as a fuck up of a dad.
“You aren’t a fuck up, man.” Lito’s spoke from beside him, startling him.
“Yes I am.” Wolfgang responded.
He blew out a shaky breath and was surprised that he had unconsciously walked to a small park around the block that he usually passed by on his morning run. He took a seat on a nearby bench and buried his face in his hands letting out another heavy breath in order to keep from hyperventilating.
“Hey,” Nomi’s voice sounded from his other side, and he felt a warm hand on his back. “It’s okay.”
"No,” Wolfgang shook his head. “I don’t even know how to hold a baby! How am I supposed to raise one?”
"You aren’t alone in this.” Nomi reminded him. “You and Kala have the rest of us. And we might not know much about rising kids but we’ll figure it out. Together.”
"And it’ll be good practice for me and Hernando, should we ever decide to adopt.” Lito added in a slightly humor tone in attempt to lighten the mood. Wolfgang gave a dry chuckle but shook his head again. “Sitting her freaking out isn’t going to change anything.” Lito continued. “She needs you.”
"Exactly,” Wolfgang felt the slap to the back of his head before he heard Sun’s voice. “She needs you so go back and apologize.”
Glancing up, Wolfgang gave Sun a glare but she only glared back, with her hands on her hips.
"You can’t run from this. So do what you do best; Fight. Fight for her. Fight for this baby.” Sun said, sounding very much like his very own personal Yoda. Though she would punch him if he ever dared to say that out loud.
Kala awoke when she felt the bed dip and the covers being lifted. She turned her head automatically towards the window expecting the harsh rays of the sun to momentarily blind her but was instead greeted by the soft shine of moonlight filling the quiet bedroom. She was momentarily disoriented as to why she was waking up when it was still night time but then the events from earlier in the day flooded back to her like a tidal wave.
After Wolfgang had left, she began to sob and at some point had been coaxed into her bed and cocooned between Riley and Capheus as they tried to comfort her while Will made them tea. The last thing she remembered was drifting off to Riley’s soft singing and now she was awakened by another body she knew all too well being pressed up against her back.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered into her neck as he looped his arms around her waist and hugged her to him. “I shouldn’t have walked out on you like that. I’m sorry.” He buried his face into her neck and pressed a soft kiss against her throat.
“You scared me.” Kala admitted slowly, placing her hand on top of his. “For a moment, I didn’t think you would come back.”
Wolfgang lifted his head to look down at her with a sad smile. "I’ll always come back to you, Kala. You’re my home.”
"I know you’re scared.” Kala turned in his arms so she could face him and cupped both his cheeks, kissing his forehead. “But there’s no doubt in my mind that you’re going to be an amazing father.”
"I’m terrified I might mess this up.” Wolfgang admitted and then laid his head down on her chest.
“Of course we’ll mess up,” He felt Kala run her fingers through his short hair as he spoke. “But we’ll fix it and we’ll learn from it. Together.”
Wolfgang nodded and closed his eyes savoring the feel of her cool fingers against his scalp.
He silently held onto her for a little while longer before he spoke again. "You should be mad at me.”
"Oh, I am furious with you, you pervert demon.” Wolfgang didn’t have to look at her to know she was smiling as she lowered her hand to swipe at his behind playfully.
“I’m serious.” He squeezed her, nuzzling his face into the soft fabric of her tank top.
“I can be mad tomorrow.” She dropped a kiss on his messy blonde hair.
“Come on,” Lito whined suddenly from across the room. “At least make him sleep on the couch for tonight.”
Wolfgang lifted his head up to glare at the Mexican and opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by Will’s scoff. "At least make him beg.”
"Or I can teach you how to kick his ass.” That was Sun.
Kala laughed when Wolfgang grumbled angrily and plopped back down on her bringing the covers over his head. “Tell them to stop being mean to me.”
"I think I’ll enjoy it for a little while longer.” Kala patted his head and wasn’t surprised to find the rest of the cluster gathered in their bedroom when she looked up again.
They all beamed at her excitedly, except Riley who sat beside their dresser with a sad, almost painful smile. Will moved to sit next to her and took her into his arms.
“Since this is the first child of the cluster I say we name him after Jean Claude.” Capheus proposed, taking a seat at the edge of their bed.
“We are not naming him Jean Claude.” Lito said with a scoff at the same time Sun said, “What if it’s a girl?”
"If it’s a girl then I say we name her after me.” Nomi grinned, taking a seat beside Capheus.
As grunts of protest sounded throughout the group and various name suggestions were thrown out, Kala looked down at Wolfgang and they both smiled at each other.
“We’re gonna be alright.” Kala assured him and pressed her lips against his.
Part 2: x