and this is all i think about every time

  • me, sobbing in my room at 3 in the morning: dear evan hansen is,,,

Just an annoying thing; my two current bosses and one former boss love to try to pull pity parties.

One former manager would often say to me things like “Ok I’m going to take a break, I haven’t eaten anything all day.” Like ok? You’re the manager, you don’t need to explain to me where you’re going or why you’re taking a break. She’s done this multiple times. Just go. And she’d also often comment to me about how long she’s worked in a day (always the same times, every time). Like she was leaving one day and as she was walking out, she passed me and actually stopped, turned around, and told me the same old, same old (I think something about how long she’s worked that day and how she’s so tired and hungry?). Like ok, you want to leave because you’re super tired, but you have enough drive and energy to take the time to stop yourself from leaving, turn around, and complain to me, nice. (It all probably doesn’t look bad in words but the tone and body language made it).

My other bosses will often tell me to serve them or save them some food (I work in a little restaurant). And they’ll tell me about how hungry they are and how they want food because they have been working or something haven’t eaten in however long. And in my head I’m just like dudes, it’s fine. You’re the bosses, you own all of this. You don’t need to give me a reason or excuse to get some of your own food?

It’s just a pet peeve I guess. Idk why it irritates me so much but it does.

baldore-of-the-boros  asked:

So we hear all the bads for a Return to Kamigawa but I was wondering what it had going for it. Save for the extreme popularity among some players, are there any big plusses it has to make RnD think about returning?

The one plus is that some die-hard invested players keep asking for it.

The minuses are plentiful, the biggest one being is was a commercial disaster that every metric demonstrated was disliked by a large majority of the playerbase (at the time).

anonymous asked:

hey, so I know how youre avidly against keeping venomous animals (unless Ive gotten you confused with another), but I stumbled across a youtuber who has 2 venomous vietnamese centipedes. she works with animals and has over 20 years of experience, and every time these bugs come up, she gives a strong disclaimer about their danger and does not handle them. The cages are also locked very securely because those little dudes are frighteningly smart. I wanted to ask your opinion, her names emzotic.

Hi there! So I’m not avidly against keeping ALL venomous animals, I am against the unregulated keeping of deadly venomous (as in could kill or seriously maim a human)  snakes. If you’re gonna keep a rattlesnake or a cobra I think you should have to get professional training, a permit, and an inspection of your facility. I’m also against the irresponsible handling of venomous animals. 

Being against the keeping of all venomous animals would mean being against the keeping of all spiders/tarantulas (including many totally harmless species), honeybees, and even some harmless snakes depending on what definition of “venom” you subscribe to (not getting into that here, but a write-up on that subject is coming in the near future).

All centipedes are venomous, but the majority cannot kill or even seriously harm a human. There has only been one verified case of a human death caused by a centipede, and it was a 7 year old child bitten by a Vietnamese centipede (it’s possible but not confirmed that the girl may have had an allergy or extra sensitivity to the venom). This is of course horribly tragic and sounds really scary, but remember that ~50 people are usually killed by bee stings in the United States ever year.

I work professionally with Vietnamese centipedes at an arthropod zoo and I would not rank them at anywhere near the danger level of deadly venomous snakes; their venom is capable of creating excruciating pain (and possibly permanent local damage if the bite isn’t treated properly) but is only seriously dangerous to very young, old, or health-compromised people. Not to mention the fact that they do not have anything close to the reach, speed, or intelligence of venomous snakes; a few very simple precautions can eliminate virtually all risk of taking a bite.

So as long as people are educated on their venom and they are kept only by knowledgeable and experienced keepers I don’t have any particular problem with it. I’m not familiar with this YouTuber, but it sounds like she’s doing it right.



DAY 3: Mission

Yall, I’m sorry I’m running behind. But I will prevail!

Also on ao3 and ffn

               Sasuke looked around him, calculating and strategizing. The odds weren’t good, but he could still make it out. Probably not unscathed, but he could survive. He may be one of the strongest, but the numbers were against him and unlike usual, the enemy seemed to all be fairly capable of fighting against him.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hey!!! i would love love love to read something about bev and bill going on their first date or something? they're all just so cute, and i love the way you write them <3

The first time Beverly Marsh goes on a date, she takes every single precaution she can think of.

The first step she thought to take is to make sure her father is out that night- but that, of course, is a given. Beverly never did much of anything when her father’s around.

The second step was to clear it with her mother. Of course, that was not too hard. Bev’s mother cared little about whatever her daughter does, as long as Alvin doesn’t find out.

The third step was to brush her hair until it gleamed like dimly heated coals in the bottom of a fire, the small blondish filaments in the strands glimmering in the flip curls she set in her hair the night before, and pull on the outfit she herself had sewn from the money she earned babysitting. Her mother had a beaming smile on her face when she saw Beverly sitting by the fire, sewing her circle skirt and bolero, grateful that her girl had finally begun to “woman up”, as she called it.

An so, after those three steps, Beverly hesitantly padded out of her room in her powder blue outfit and modernly styled hair flip, looking more radiant than most people thought possible, even for a gorgeous girl like Bevvie. Elfrida looked up from her book, smiling slightly at her daughter.

“Hey, sweetie.”

“Hey, mom.” She hugged the older woman, kissing her cheek and letting her mother try to straighten any discrepancies Bev herself had missed. “So, I put the lasagna in the fridge, and it’s good cold, but the neighbors have a microwave so they’ll let you borrow it if you want, momma-”

Elfrida rolled her eyes, rubbing Beverly’s shoulders. “I know, I know, Bevvie. Jeez louise, don’t you trust your old woman? I can take care of myself, sweetie.”

Beverly shifted. “I know, it’s just-” She was interrupted by a knock at the door, and she scrambled to get to it. Opening the creaky screen thing she’d learned to call her front entrance, she beamed up at the third redhead to enter the cramped apartment. “Hello, Bill!”

The boy smiled back, handing her a small book he’d been carrying that she took immediately and with thanks. “H-hello, Bevvie.” The mother hovering near them tensed at the sound of a man using that name on her daughter, but seeing how earnest and truthful the boy looked, and how happy Beverly’s expression was, she relaxed. This boy was no Alvin Marsh, nothing to be worried about. He looked almost soft, but there was something about his features, something that told of wiseness beyond his years and a set to his eyes that spoke volumes, as well as the small cut on his upper lip that had scarred over and already begun to disappear. Must’ve been a childhood accident, she thought, before starting into the present and seeing the two teenagers staring at her.

“Okay, anyways, so mom, we’re gonna head out, is that okay?”

Elfrida cleared her throat. “Uh… yeah. That’s okay. Have fun, sweetie!” She hugged Beverly one last time, holding the door open for the couple, before collapsing in her chair with a sigh. Oh, but what was her Beverly getting up to now?

Outside, the two teenagers sat pretty in the front of Bill’s father’s borrowed car. Beverly looked out the window pensively, avoiding eye contact with Bill, who stole a kiss on her cheek before started the car.

“Aw, huh-heck, Bev,” he started. “W-w-we’re, like, buh-best friends, let’s stop being so awkward.”

“It’s only awkward if you make it awkward, Billy. So stop it.” She grinned up at the boy, letting him rest his free hand over hers, even though her mind was full of worries about him driving one handed at this time on a summer night. They’d crash, she was sure they would, because Beverly Marsh got the shortest end of the stick in every game, every situation, every pair. She was sure to crash.

After all, isn’t something like this too good to be true? Isn’t sitting in a car with Bill Denbrough, Mister Congeniality, driving next to her in his slacks and shirt and shiny shoes looking just as handsome as ever. Girls like Bev weren’t meant to have guys like Bill, guys who

(piss rosewater)

drive fancier cars and can afford new suits each dance but don’t buy them, pay for everyone’s food at the diner, wear aftershave from somewhere other than a discount department store window and have shiny white teeth. Beverly was just a girl, a poor little girl whose father beat her because she wasn’t good enough, smart enough, quick enough to get away, whose nail polish was always uneven and chipped and slightly offshade. Did Bill know that? Did he realize how good he could get? She felt tempted to ask.

But she said nothing of the sort, and stayed sitting perfectly still as she looked sideways at Bill. She pressed her thumb onto a bruise in her arm and felt the dull throb. She was still here.

Bill cleared his throat. “S-so, what p-picture do you want to see?”

She shrugged. “Dunno. What’s on, Big Bill?” She grinned at him, her retainer showing and gleaming slightly in the dying light. Despite the bar of metal, Bill couldn’t help but feel as if she could move the sky with her smile, and the urge to kiss her was back, this time stronger than ever.

“Uh, I th-think that a horror duh-double feature is on, is th-thuh-that okay?” Bill worried his lip, stealing a glance at his date- even the word sounded wonderful, date- already imagining the way Beverly might curl up into him, might want to hold hands so she wouldn’t get scared- but that wasn’t Beverly. The scared, skittish little girl in Bill’s mind wasn’t Beverly, who was strong and proud and didn’t need anyone else to hold her hand through things, and especially a man. Maybe she’d want to giggle with him about the campy effects, pull him in close and point out how you can see the dead bodies breathing in the back of the scene. Maybe she’d make fun of him for his reactions to the gore and smile affectionately at him. But she most DEFINITELY wouldn’t be scared.

That wasn’t Beverly Marsh.

“Sure, sounds good.”

The two rode in a comfortable lull of quiet banter about their friends and their lives and their school, spaced with lengthy silences where Bill turned the radio up a tad and tapped his feet, because after all, Bev and Bill are friends, but that didn’t stop them from having the awkward, first-date aura teenagers have.

And so it was. The movies were fun and light-hearted in a fifties horror way, and Beverly on several occasions snorted in laughter at the ridiculousness that were I Was a Teenage Werewolf and House of Wax. Bill thought it was all adorable, with her nose scrunched up and her eyes crinkled, although he’d never tell her unless he wanted a black eye.

Halfway through the second movie, though, Beverly made eye contact with him and mouthed, ‘wanna leave?’

Bill sat up in his chair, rubbing at his eyes and looking at Beverly, who was already putting her seat rest up and leaning across the seat to rest her head against his chest. He shook his head, stretching his arm around her tentatively before she smiled up at him affirmatively and he dropped his arm onto the line of her side. She turned back to the screen and kept watching, breathing in time to Bill’s heart rate as it slowed.

As soon as the movie ended, Beverly was on her feet, large popcorn in her arm resting on her hip as she pulled the sleepy Bill up.

“Get up, sleepyhead!” She said, quite loudly, in his ear. “You fell asleep so many times.”

Bill got up, rubbing his eyes with the back of the hand Beverly was holding, before she began walking away and slapping his jaw with the palm of their hands absently as they moved along.

“S-sorry. Hey, you g-g-gonna throw thuh-hat away?” He gestured to the popcorn.

Beverly looked up at him with a furrowed brow, Holding the popcorn closer to her side as they went out onto the street. “No.”

Bill half smirked, half raised an eyebrow. “Ah-and why’s th-that?”

“Cause it’s free food.” Beverly was mumbling the sentence in shame as she walked on. “I can throw it away, if you want, it’s just…”

Bill’s eyes widened. “Oh.” His smirk was gone. Beverly was saving the popcorn because… OH. How could he have been so stupid? “Bev, I’m suh-suh-s-sorr-”

“You’re sorry.” She sighed a little, her broad shoulders heaving up and down once slowly, before lifting her head up with a twinkle in her eye. “You should be sorry, Denbrough, I’m gonna get you!”

“O-oh no!” Bill laughed, feigning surprise and dodging her hands. “Just eat your p-p-popcorn, little g-girl, and leave m-me alone.”

She popped some of the snack into her mouth, eating it before glaring at Bill with her mouth full. “Maybe I WILL,” she said once her mouth was empty. “Want any, by the way?”

“S-sure.” Bill grabbed a handful, throwing them into the air one at a time and arcing them into his mouth as they walked down the street. “Suh-so, where’re w-we going?”

“The park.”

Bill tensed, remembering what had been happening his whole life whenever he went anywhere normal in the dark. “N-no we’re n-not.” He gently wheeled her around until she shook him off defiantly.

“Why? I want to see the fountain at night!” Beverly stared him down, her look comical as she had to tilt her eyes slightly up to meet his and she was holding a large box at least as wide as her hips against her torso, her legs slightly widely set apart.

“N-no. S-sorry, Bevvie, I duh-don’t mean to c-control you, buh-but no.”

“But WHY?” Now it was Bill’s turn to duck his head. Beverly grinned. “Oh my God. Are you scared of the dark?”

Bill Denbrough, the six foot tall cross country team captain, looked away embarrassedly. “I duh-dunno. Maybe,” he mumbled, walking faster as Bev followed him closely, eventually grabbing his hand and pulling him back to her with gales of laughter.

“Oh my God, are you kidding me?” Beverly snorted as Bill’s cheeks turned pink. “Bill Denbrough’s scared of the dark?”

“Shuh-shut up.” Bill grumbled some more until he noticed Bev shivering. “You c-cold, Bevvie?”


“You wuh-want my coat?”


Bill smirked yet again. “Too bad.”

“You’re so difficult, Big Bill, you know that?” Bill smirked at that too, taking the popcorn from her hands and setting it on the trash as they walked past one. He took his jacket off, placing it on Beverly’s shoulders and gently flipping her hair out of the collar, before slipping his hand into Beverly’s and putting their heads closer together. Beverly could smell his aftershave on the coat and on Bill himself, evergreeney and touched with juniper, and she shivered at the sentiment.

“Yuh-you’re not t-t-too easy to pl-pluh-please yourself, Bevvie.” He kissed the side of her mouth after a whispered ask for permission, missing most of her mouth but succeeding in making Bev push back into his lips. “Luh-let’s go g-get you some ruh-real food, huh? A burger instead of puh-p-puh-poh-”

“Popcorn. Got it, Bill.” She kissed him back, pulling him along for what seemed like the umpteenth time that night. “Let’s go.”

And they went.

Self harm

Self harm is hurting oneself by cutting, burning, hitting yourself etc.

I’m sitting outside and I see those scars. Scars I made with a blade. I’m in my garden and I have shorts on and I see them. They are so ugly and I would do everything to never have started, but it’s too late now.

How can people think that those scars are beautiful or anything like that? How?They are not. They are disgusting and every time you see them, they remind you of what you did to your skin,all the pain and then you realise that they will always be here. One day they will fade, but you will always know what you did.

I started at a young age and maybe if I had told anyone how I felt and that I thought about self harming then maybe this would have never happened. I wouldn’t be sitting outside covered in scars. I don’t know if I will ever be able to stop. I know I could just try to distract myself, but anyone who has ever self harmed knows that that isn’t easy. It’s the opposite. You try to distract yourself, but all you can think of is hurting yourself. You have such an urge to do it. No one who hasn’t done it will ever understand that. You try to distract yourself by hurting yourself. For a few seconds you feel relief, but just for a few seconds… then you start doing it more often and that’s when you get addicted to feeling this pain. Some do it, because they feel numb or to distract themselves. But after that you either feel numb again or you just feel so bad about it and it just makes everything worse. 

So please never ever start. If you think about doing it talk to somebody. You can also always talk to me and believe me that’s not worth it. You destroy yourself, your own skin and for everyone who is stuggling with self harm I know it’s not easy to stop, but please never stop fighting.

I’m always here for anyone to talk to. ❤️

anonymous asked:

I'm dating this girl right now who's like out of this world perfect. My ex from like a year ago keeps hitting me up and asking if we can be friends and every time she texts me my girlfriend sees it and looks away. She never says anything but I know what she's thinking, I'll go back to my ex and forget all about her. How do I get her to know that this isn't true? I want to give her everything I have because it's what she deserves, I just don't know how when she doesn't trust me.

Block your ex

i sit here on my bathroom floor,
like every other night before,
and i wonder.

i wonder why.
why does everything happen?
why do bad things happen to good people?
why do bad things happen to me?

i think of the time,
when i learned my love loved another,
and i sat on this same bathroom floor
and i thought my heavy heart would make it cave through.

i think of all the times,
after his devil hands scorched my angel skin,
and i sat on this same bathroom floor
wishing that it would swallow me whole.

i think of the times,
when i discovered the sound of thunder wasn’t really thunder,
but the sound of their screams outside the door.
i had to teach this to my brother.

as i sit here now on the cold tiles,
i wonder why i am not good enough,
why i am never good enough
and why everything hurts so bad.

i lean my head back against the wall,
staring up i wonder,
would the ceiling ever treat me like this?

Yknow how Blue Diamond in earlier episodes before Steven’s Dream looked like she had dark blue hair? I initially thought that was just inconsistent design or whatever (I mean what are the chances someone poofed BLUE DIAMOND), but. Think about tHIS: a gem’s physical form is a projection, right? And usually the projection vaguely matches some aspect of their personality (like Garnet being a literal square, or Yellow Diamond being all sharp corners and lines), right? What if Blue’s hair turned white because of stress and depression? After all, every time we see her with dark hair it’s before Pink was shattered.

smashtap  asked:

hey! just want to drop by and say i get so excited every time you post and i really enjoy all the writing you do especially about stain! thank you so much for giving stain love!

Admin Speaks: You are one of the few names that I see frequently in my notifications and always smile a little at it, don’t know why but when I see returning names I get a little giddy! Thank you for enjoying what I put out into the world, it really means a lot to me 

Originally posted by yurionice

I just wanted to quickly say that I’ve really appreciated everything you guys have done for me. I care about each and every one of you. You’re amazing! I just don’t know how to express how I feel sometimes but please know even if I didn’t response, I either haven’t read it, or don’t know how to respond. I appreciate all the messages you send and I hope that you don’t think I’m being mean or cold by not responding. I’m also trying to spend less time on the internet, so I’m not online as often as I was before. Also, please don’t feel obligated to message me back immediately. I understand that you have lives outside of me and I don’t expect you guys to just drop everything you’re doing and talk to me. I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you had to put me before your lives. Afterall, I’m just a stranger across the world. The fact that you guys seem to care so much about me makes me very emotional, especially since my own family doesn’t care nearly as much as you guys. I love you all very much ❤️❤️


do you know that (8/8) : bts edition

I promise it won’t be easy. There will be days where we fight, especially over stupid things like who left the coffee pot on again.

There will be times where I’ll yell at you to go sleep on the couch but I swear, every single time in the middle of the night, I’d tell you to come back to bed because god knows I can’t sleep properly without you.

We won’t always be that couple people would want to look up to, but we will be that couple where we don’t care about what anyone else thinks.

Like for instance, we can be sitting at a resturant and all of a sudden, you’re putting straws into your nose and pretending that you’re a walrus and everytime, I would laugh.

Even if the joke dies down about after the fifth time and people are staring at us, I promise to always laugh.

And I know it won’t be easy, because we both do things that makes the other person crazy but we are we, and I love you and I’m willing to wake up every day going through life loving you, even on the days where we both can barely stand each other.

Because honestly, there is no where else I would rather wake up at if it isn’t beside you.
—  A.M// for jake, it won’t be easy but i promise to always love you.
I want to see more big girls as the stars of mainstream films, and owning every single person in the movie with their “I don’t give a damn about what you think, I’m beautiful and I know it” attitude. More shows with leads that are transgender women showing us how incredible they are in what they endure from society and conduct themselves with such admirable pride and strength. More women of colour centric tv shows highlighting all the struggles they must survive growing up. More autistic girls being protagonists of movies and showing people that autism can also mean kindness, intelligence and beauty if you take the time to understand that it’s a different system. I want more differently abled girls becoming superstars in tv shows with their positive attitudes to life, their incredible spirit and their immense compassion. I want mainstream films and tv shows to start making them the heroes they deserve to be. We need to show our children that heroes come on all kinds of bodies, all kinds of minds and that is something we should love and respect as a society. We need to make tv shows and films as diverse as they can be so our children and their children can understand themselves, love themselves, and treat each other with empathy.
—  Nikita Gill, On TV Shows And Movies And True Female Inclusivity