and this felt like the scene i wanted to use for this part

WKM - What happened?

I’m going to cover all of this mess in this post. It’s just what I think could be the truly amazing story behind this amazing video series. 

There are LOTS of questions in my own head and I’m gonna try answering (hopefully) most of them! Here we go!

WHO KILLED HIM NOW?

The biggest question raised is, obviously, who killed Markiplier? From what we could gather throughout the series, demons are likely to exist in this scenario.

Even the newspaper gives a hint that the mayor might have been a “demon in disguise”. So there are spiritual, supernatural things happening here. I, for one, can not answer the biggest question out of all, how he died and who he was killed by. I can only make one assumption; here’s my theory.

We know that Mark’s body went missing at some point. Where exactly is never shown or hinted at, but I have a likely theory that Mark himself was the one to hide his own body in form of his spirit. Or just, behind all that was happening in general. However, what we do know is that Mark, I quote (Damien): “(He) trapped us here in this broken shell and we had no way out.” 

It seems established that, during the time we were outside to talk to the gardener, Damien and Celine tried to reach out to Mark(’s ghost), hence she wanted to “talk to the dead”. During that time, Mark took the chance to inhabit Damien’s body and trap him inside his own, dead shell that could not be used anymore. Whilst doing so he either accidentally killed Celine by possessing her first, her not being able to hold the soul inside her body, OR Celine did not die and let Damien inside her body to save him from being thrown into the corpse, which would explain why she was red and blue in the end sequence of Chapter 3. She also appears to be having two pairs of eyes above her head at one point. Possibly a hint that she’s two in one at that point?

Either way, we know that Damien represents BLUE and Celine represents RED thanks to the ending of Chapter 4:

Which is why it could very well be that She kept Damien’s soul inside her body for a short while to save his life. And of course Damien was PISSED after that, betrayed by whom he cared for, who he fought Will for and whom he thought was a good, a childhood friend he could trust. That’s for the angry step towards us, the angry stare. He looks at us, knowingly. He chooses his victim that very moment.

We are told to run. The door closes and Celine does not come out. Her shell possibly broke and both souls were set free without a shell, or she kept it up and waited for the right moment to talk to us. 

The right moment being the time Will shot us.

And here is the thing; We did NOT die. If you listen closely, you can hear a faint heartbeat in the background during this very scene. They both tell you to believe them, tell you stories to make you feel sorry for them. Which, of course, you do. Damien seems pissed and loses his temper once more, like he did with the Colonel before, and shouts angrily that Mark walks around in his body. Which is why I think that part is true. He couldn’t take his anger in. He can’t, he has a low temper, that’s just it.

But Celine reminds him that he “can’t do this right now”. Reminds us to believe them. What you’re told is that Mark trapped both of them inside his old, dead body and that they brought you there so you have a chance to survive. Damien tells you that you can’t survive on your own and Celine says she can bring you back the same way she brought you there. But what Damien says afterwards is the most important clue.

He says: “But you can’t survive on your own. You’re .. dead, after all. (…) I know this all sounds crazy. Honestly, I don’t know what the fuck is going on. But I know that I trust Celine. And if you trust us … let me in. We can fix this.”

Gathered: Damien lies to you after all this time of actually being genuine. He was betrayed by Mark, knows that you trust him, wants revenge and is angry. He lures you into a false sense of security, tells you you can fix this together. He makes you feel like a friend by telling you that he feels the same way about all of this. And then, he mentions that oh so beloved trust of his. That one thing he completely lost thanks to Mark. 

Also important to note; It is ONLY DAMIEN that inhabits your body after all of this. Why is that?
Celine states that she can send “you” back, not “us”. She says “you” have a choice. And Damien ends his sentence with “let me in.” Not let us in.

You trust Damien and he tells you that it will work, he promises.

And it does work! You wake up in your own body, get up, meet the Colonel who is completely out of it by now.

He does not recognize us as a “Dark” or “Damien” because we don’t look like Damien yet and Dark doesn’t exist yet either. Damien, at this point, is inside our body and trying to take over. 

We listen to what Will says and see him, in desperation and utter confusion, try to find his dear friends he lost.

Once he’s away, only THEN do we walk over to the mirror. And here is where it gets interesting.

We take Damien’s cane: Take a look at the hands.

A thin, female and young looking hand (possibly Amy wee i love her), but then something happens.

The hand changes, transforms into a different one. Into a hand similar to Damien’s. Because Damien is inhabiting your body by himself. Celine is likely still in Mark’s body or, as I mentioned earlier, never died to begin with. It’s Damien who was so fed up, he had to use you to get what he wants. And he gets it alright:

A body. A shell to use as a puppet. He transformed your body into a copy of his own. Mark likely still uses actual Damien’s body, but Damien had to make you look like him to finish this with you. 

Then this happens.

And sad music plays in the background all throughout this scene and it broke my heart - but why did it break my heart? Because that right there is a representation of broken trust, my friends. Damien threw us out of the body he stole from us and trapped us either behind our screens or in that mirror (hence the weird noise light inside the crack). He used us. He manipulated us. We were his first victim.

And he feels bad about it at first. Note how Dark’s look changes after he throws us out? Because now we can see what he truly is; a broken man. He had so much trust in Mark, in us. He was a genuine, good and kind hearted man. He neglected his other friends for Mark only to then find himself betrayed by Mark or whatever he had unleashed that day. He is troubled, his emotions are a whirlwind and all the while he has to keep his anger inside. After all, Damien has a short and low temper. Guilty about what happened, he looks up at you.

Reminds himself that he has a goal now; take revenge. Looks at you now with almost disgust to make you feel even worse. This is a reflection of his own emotions that very moment. We are supposed to feel exactly what Damien felt. Betrayal, fear, loneliness. An end. The mirror itself is a genius metaphor for this.

He then leaves us. Clearly guided by rage and hatred and you can FEEL that, I get goosebumps just thinking about this. (@markiplier frickin amazing acting, dude!) Anyway, here he makes up his mind to take back control over what is rightfully his. Mark; his own body.

We are then left in darkness, questioning and clueless, sad and quite literally broken. 

Dark’s origin, ladies and gentlemen.

(just my take on this. It’s probably, like, super wrong lmao also sorry for the long post ilyall)

post-emoji movie Trauma

WARNING: the following text contains spoilers and can be considered disturbing to some readers. especially my brain, because it’s leaking out my ears after typing this.

This is the first movie ever I’ve gone to see on opening night. And let me just say that, for the record, I’m glad I went to watch with friends. Without them, I would have most likely calmly exited the room, climbed up to the roof, and dived straight off.

Keep reading

Stranger Things Season 2 trailer shot by shot run down

I do not claim or own any of these screenshots all rights to Netflix


aw look at my children doing normal children things can’t wait to see how long that’s going to last 

so, the way that Dungeons and Dragons was sort of the running analogy last season, my guess is that this game is going to be the overlying symbolism for this season.

my boys all back together and happy again can’t wait to see how long that’ll last :’)

so if this is the analogy I’m guessing the “sword” is going to be the key to slaying the monster

again, the dragon probably = the monster

and if so, the fact that Dustin seemingly LOST this game sort of worries me…

case in point

this trailer took approximately 15 seconds to get me to say “oh no”

AS I WAS SAYING (okay so obviously from what we left off on last season and the trailers/ teaser we’ve gotten. we now know this season is going to deal with the aftermath of the Upside Down for Will as well as the entire community as rifts have been opened to other worlds)

so i’m assuming Will’s main arc this season is going to be his struggle with being split between two worlds, and though I understand why they did it I wish we could see more of Will apart from that but oh well)

me too buddy, me too.

and thus, we have our big bad for the season *rubs hands together*

mike he is obviously not okay but thanks for being concerned

correct me if i’m wrong but is that Jonathan’s car? why is he leaving?

sooooo why isn’t Will at school?

stancy break up/ tension possibly? nothing good ever really comes from their meeting in this ally

aw…is this why he wasn’t in school? Joyce obviously knows something is up. (side note: is that Hopper behind them?)

oh come on-

these SOBs again?

so i guess maybe the Upside Down;s bleeding over to our world effect crops too???????

Hopper and Joyce as parents yes please (also Will is not okay)

“I felt it everywhere” wtf is that supposed to mean that’s terrifying

please just let the Byers family live someone give them a break

why do they look so suspect? who are they looking at?

honestly I’m loving the Halloween time theme I can’t wait for the aesthetics they’re going to be implementing

my connection/ insider I have previously hinted to me about a Steve/ kids dynamic that was going to be happening this season, but I’m actually very interested to see where this goes and the relationships that’ll come out of it

again with the aesthetics !!! yes !!! please!!! and !!! thank !!! you !!!

when the scientists are worried, it’s really time to get worried

uuuhhhhh yikes? blood is never a good sign?

ESPECIALLY AROUND DUSTIN NO DO NOT WANT THIS TRAILER IS MAKING ME REALLY CONCERNED ABOUT HIS SAFETY AS A CHARACTER

ah yes all is probably not well at the Wheeler household 

of course my dork sons all go trick or treating in matching Ghost Busters costumes I love them

it looks like he’s tracking something. buuuuut what?

HOP!! I MISSED YOU AND YOUR PERPETUALLY CONFUSED EYEBROWS

oooohhhhhh these boys look like they’re crushing on the new giiirrrllll 👀 (mainly Lucas and Dustin? maybe Will I can’t tell) (except for Mike because they really are doing everything they can to bury me in Mileven feels)

I can literally feel her angst radiating off the screen and I have a feeling I’m going to stan her unless the writers use her as a devise to cause tension or rivalry among the boys in which case someone is going to die

“Sometimes I feel like I can still see her” WHY DO THE WRITERS FEEL THE NEED TO HURT ME LIKE THIS GAH I MISS MILEVEN HE EVEN KEPT HER BLANKET FORT UP  (because also it’s important to note that this is the same shirt from the screenshot of them watching the girl walk in. so if Mike goes home and realizes he still misses I’m going to choke)

can’t wait for this to most likely just be a cat jump scare

they’re building something don’t ask me what

if I had to guess I would say some sort of device that picks up on signals from the Upside Down maybe? like some sort of crystal radio?

but why does Mike kind of look like hes going to smash it with the speaker?

new girl seems to be working with them/ part of the group now. but the box opened? idk this part is confusing

-EDIT/ UPDATE THANKS TO @disneyprincesskatherine apparently this is a reference to Ghostbusters! the box is similar to a device they use in the movies to catch ghost (i’m uncultured I’m so sorry). she also speculates this is the capture of the sort of “pet” Dustin gets that Gaten talked about (could also be why there is blood on Dustin’s chair)

okay but where is #4? they’re still in their Halloween costumes so we can assume it’s either the day of or the morning after, though on what looked to be Halloween night in one of the previous screencaps, all 4 were present soooo

more evidence of the world meshing

YOU BEST BELIEVE I SCREAMED OUT LOUD I MISSED THEM (they both looks so good I‘m loving the haircuts) (and is this them breaking into the lab?)

even though this is a gross slimy portal to another dimension, i’m still digging the aesthetics

Will is not okay part 87450507

this is either a drawing of a map of the Upside Down or all connecting tree roots. either way wtf Will?

This time on: OTPs With Unreal Height Differences 

it kind of looks like the same “tree roots” on the ground as there were at the gas station shot so yeah, I think Will was drawing a giant root system

🎶 you’re my daaad, you’re my dad, boogie woogie woogie 🎶

DREAM TEAM (Mike, Nancy, Jonathan, Joyce) (also can we laugh at the fact that Mike is armed with a candle holder while he stands next to his sister literally holding a shot gun)

Hop digging my grave for when I finish the season

*cues classic 80′s teen movie party montage*

my girl wildin out (and Steve’s there too I guess)

TELL ME WHO HURT YOU (this is a different outfit from the party though, so it’s not the same scene)

a new weapon? perhaps the “sword”?

!!!!!!

OH GOD TELL ME HOP IS OKAY

everyone in this trailer looks as shook as I feel watching it

Will Is Not Okay: The Saga Continues

same shirt so most likely what he’s experiencing on the other side. I’m almost certain he’s going to play a big role in Eleven being able to come back to the other side

Journey To The Center of the Earth (2008)

well well well, Samwise Gamgee, what’s poppin’

why does Steve have Jonathan’s bat?

as far as I can tell this treck into the Upside Down consists of Mike, Dustin, Joyce, and I can’t tell who the others are 

“ABORT ABORT!!!” (this is a different scene from the one above so I wonder what this is in reference to)

another shot of Will being scared out of his mind, this kid doesn’t ever get a break (though the background looks almost like the lab as opposed to the upside down. I could be wrong)

…well that’s concerning (kind of looks like that giant monster is chasing him)

“If you’re out there, please just give me a sign”

so this looks to be back in the Upside Down equivalent to the classroom where Eleven defeated the Demegorgan. and based on the look on her face and the previous shot above, it seems she JUST woke up

YES MY BADASS CHILD I NEVER DOUBTED YOU FOR A SECOND

yES HER RETURN IS ABOUT TO BE ICONIC

YALL MIND IF I WILD OUT OVER THESE AESTHETICS AGAIN

I’m so freaking happy for her return to Mike us

Lord almighty this season looks amazing.

Death Note (2017)

This movie was…well, it was something. And that something is terrible. My thoughts:

Good Things:

  • William Dafoe as Ryuk was amazing. He fit the part perfectly and was delightfully creepy. 
  • Kieth Stanfield was surprisingly good as L. His mannerisms were perfect, and his more emotional approach gave the character an appealing weakness amidst his oddity.
  • The few gambits that actually appeared were very well-crafted, particularly the finale. They actually felt like Death Note, unlike the rest of the film.
  • Light’s facial expressions and girlish screams made me laugh so much that I’m putting them here

Bad Things:

  • The establishing shots existing only to demonstrate how Mia and Light are edgy outcasts who will naturally have perfect chemistry
  • “Light Turner”
  • Everything about Light’s character. He’s the opposite of the original character- an outcast, stupid, easily controlled by his emotions, acts like the most suspicious person on the planet, outright admits to being Kira to L’s face- everything that made the original Light great is gone and replaced with something that doesn’t fit. 
  • How is decapitation the first method of death you think of for a school bully
  • The pacing is so bad. Like, it’s hard to even give a specific example because the entire movie counts.
  • “Your mom was kind of a hippie.” THAT DOES NOT EXCUSE HOW STUPID HIS NAME SOUNDS.
  • Where are the mind games and gambits? There were precisely two moments that felt like the original in terms of genius and complexity.
  • Character motivations. Almost no one has a believable reason for doing what they do. Mia especially. She just…comes out of left field.
  • “If we make the deaths super gory, people will think we’re cool.”
  • “If we say the word fuck a lot, people will think we’re cool.”
  • The lack of subtlety. 
  • L comes from a creepy orphanage for some reason
  • Matsuda is not here
  • The romantic plot is so. Bad. “Hey, I can impress a girl by showing her how I have the power to murder anyone I want!” “Hey, I’m into that!” “Let’s plot the deaths of dozens of people on our next date!”
  • On that note, all the dialogue is terrible
  • There’s something about the way everyone treats L that’s just…off. In the original, he was eccentric but respected. Here, he’s eccentric and no one likes him.
  • Why is Watari so obsessed with sleep????
  • Watari was pretty much wasted tbh
  • No feel of rivalry between Light and L whatsoever. 
  • THE TOP HAT
  • Why is everything so edgy????
  • The flowers that just friggin…explode when Mia lands on them
  • What is with the corny pop music at inappropriate times???
  • Light having a “Normal People Scare Me” sticker on his locker pretty much summarizes the entire movie
  • No potato chip scene. A travesty

Basically, watch this movie if you want a good laugh via ridiculous edginess, unneeded gore, and necessary swearing. I would’ve liked to see an Americanized Death Note that made better use of its differences from the original to better fit its target audience, but this movie just tried waaaaaay too hard to be dark and gritty while giving nothing of substance. But it is hilarious. And at least it’s got William Defoe.

Dead Fandoms, Part 3

Read Part One of Dead Fandoms here. 

Read Part Two of Dead Fandoms here. 

Before we continue, I want to add the usual caveat that I actually don’t want to be right about these fandoms being dead. I like enthusiasm and energy and it’s a shame to see it vanish.


Mists of Avalon

Remember that period of time of about 15 years, where absolutely everybody read this book and was obsessed with it? It could not have been bigger, and the fandom was Anne Rice huge, overlapping for several years with USENET and the early World Wide Web…but it’s since petered out. 

Mists of Avalon’s popularity may be due to the most excellent case of hitting a demographic sweet spot ever. The book was a feminist retelling of the Arthurian Mythos where Morgan Le Fay is the main character, a pagan from matriarchal goddess religions who is fighting against encroaching Christianity and patriarchal forms of society coming in with it. Also, it made Lancelot bisexual and his conflict is how torn he is about his attraction to both Arthur and Guinevere.

Remember, this novel came out in 1983 – talk about being ahead of your time! If it came out today, the reaction from a certain corner would be something like “it is with a heavy heart that I inform you that tumblr is at it again.”

Man, demographically speaking, that’s called “nailing it.” It used to be one of the favorite books of the kind of person who’s bookshelf is dominated by fantasy novels about outspoken, fiery-tongued redheaded women, who dream of someday moving to Scotland, who love Enya music and Kate Bush, who sell homemade needlepoint stuff on etsy, who consider their religious beliefs neo-pagan or wicca, and who have like 15 cats, three of which are named Isis, Hypatia, and Morrigan.

This type of person is still with us, so why did this novel fade in popularity? There’s actually a single hideous reason: after her death around 2001, facts came out that Marion Zimmer Bradley abused her daughters sexually. Even when she was alive, she was known for defending and enabling a known child abuser, her husband, Walter Breen. To say people see your work differently after something like this is an understatement – especially if your identity is built around being a progressive and feminist author.


Robotech

I try to break up my sections on dead fandoms into three parts: first, I explain the property, then explain why it found a devoted audience, and finally, I explain why that fan devotion and community went away. Well, in the case of Robotech, I can do all three with a single sentence: it was the first boy pilot/giant robot Japanimation series that shot for an older, teenage audience to be widely released in the West. Robotech found an audience when it was the only true anime to be widely available, and lost it when became just another import anime show. In the days of Crunchyroll, it’s really hard to explain what made Robotech so special, because it means describing a different world.

Try to imagine what it was like in 1986 for Japanime fans: there were barely any video imports, and if you wanted a series, you usually had to trade tapes at your local basement club (they were so precious they couldn’t even be sold, only traded). If you were lucky, you were given a script to translate what you were watching. Robotech though, was on every day, usually after school. You want an action figure? Well, you could buy a Robotech Valkyrie or a Minmei figure at your local corner FAO Schwartz. 

However, the very strategy that led to it getting syndicated is the very reason it was later vilified by the purists who emerged when anime became a widespread cultural force: strictly speaking, there actually is no show called “Robotech.” Since Japanese shows tend to be short run, say, 50-60 episodes, it fell well under the 80-100 episode mark needed for syndication in the US. The producer of Harmony Gold, Carl Macek, had a solution: he’d cut three unrelated but similar looking series together into one, called “Robotech.” The shows looked very similar, had similar love triangles, used similar tropes, and even had little references to each other, so the fit was natural. It led to Robotech becoming a weekday afternoon staple with a strong fandom who called themselves “Protoculture Addicts.” There were conventions entirely devoted to Robotech. The supposed shower scene where Minmei was bare-breasted was the barely whispered stuff of pervert legend in pre-internet days. And the tie in novels, written with the entirely western/Harmony Gold conception of the series and which continued the story, were actually surprisingly readable.

The final nail in the coffin of Robotech fandom was the rise of Sailor Moon, Toonami, Dragonball, and yes, Pokemon (like MC Hammer’s role in popularizing hip hop, Pokemon is often written out of its role in creating an audience for the next wave of cartoon imports out of insecurity). Anime popularity in the West can be defined as not a continuing unbroken chain like scifi book fandom is, but as an unrelated series of waves, like multiple ancient ruins buried on top of each other (Robotech was the vanguard of the third wave, as Anime historians reckon); Robotech’s wave was subsumed by the next, which had different priorities and different “core texts.” Pikachu did what the Zentraedi and Invid couldn’t do: they destroyed the SDF-1.


Legion of Super-Heroes

Legion of Superheroes was comic set in the distant future that combined superheroes with space opera, with a visual aesthetic that can best be described as “Star Trek: the Motion Picture, if it was set in a disco.” 

I’ve heard wrestling described as “a soap opera for men.” If that’s the case, then Legion of Super-Heroes was a soap opera for nerds. The book is about attractive 20-somethings who seem to hook up all the time. As a result, it had a large female fanbase, which, I cannot stress enough, is incredibly unusual for this era in comics history. And if you have female fans, you get a lot of shipping and slashfic, and lots of speculation over which of the boy characters in the series is gay. The fanon answer is Element Lad, because he wore magenta-pink and never had a girlfriend. (Can’t argue with bulletproof logic like that.) In other words, it was a 1970s-80s fandom that felt much more “modern” than the more right-brained, bloodless, often anal scifi fandoms that existed around the same time, where letters pages were just nitpicking science errors by model train and elevator enthusiasts.

Legion Headquarters seemed to be a rabbit fuck den built around a supercomputer and Danger Room. Cosmic Boy dressed like Tim Curry in Rocky Horror. There’s one member, Duo Damsel, who can turn into two people, a power that, in the words of Legion writer Jim Shooter, was “useful for weird sex…and not much else.”

LSH was popular because the fans were insanely horny. This is, beyond the shadow of a doubt, the thirstiest fandom of all time.  You might think I’m overselling this, but I really think that’s an under-analyzed part of how some kinds of fiction build a devoted fanbase.  

For example, a big reason for the success of Mass Effect is that everyone has a favorite girl or boy, and you have the option to romance them. Likewise, everyone who was a fan of Legion remembers having a crush. Sardonic Ultra Boy for some reason was a favorite among gay male nerds (aka the Robert Conrad Effect). Tall, blonde, amazonian telepath Saturn Girl, maybe the first female team leader in comics history, is for the guys with backbone who prefer Veronica over Betty. Shrinking Violet was a cute Audrey Hepburn type. And don’t forget Shadow Lass, who was a blue skinned alien babe with pointed ears and is heavily implied to have an accent (she was Aayla Secura before Aayla Secura was Aayla Secura). Light Lass was commonly believed to be “coded lesbian” because of a short haircut and her relationships with men didn’t work out. The point is, it’s one thing to read about the adventures of a superteam, and it implies a totally different level of mental and emotional involvement to read the adventures of your imaginary girlfriend/boyfriend.  

Now, I should point out that of all the fandoms I’ve examined here, LSH was maybe the smallest. Legion was never a top seller, but it was a favorite of the most devoted of fans who kept it alive all through the seventies and eighties with an energy and intensity disproportionate to their actual numbers. My gosh, were LSH fans devoted! Interlac and Legion Outpost were two Legion fanzines that are some of the most famous fanzines in comics history.

If nerd culture fandoms were drugs, Star Wars would be alcohol, Doctor Who would be weed, but Legion of Super-Heroes would be injecting heroin directly into your eyeballs. Maybe it is because the Legionnaires were nerdy, too: they played Dungeons and Dragons in their off time (an escape, no doubt, from their humdrum, mundane lives as galaxy-rescuing superheroes). There were sometimes call outs to Monty Python. Basically, the whole thing had a feel like the dorkily earnest skits or filk-singing at a con. Legion felt like it’s own fan series, guest starring Patton Oswalt and Felicia Day.

It helped that the boundary between fandom and professional was incredibly porous. For instance, pro-artist Dave Cockrum did covers for Legion fanzines. Former Legion APA members Todd and Mary Biernbaum got a chance to actually write Legion, where, with the gusto of former slashfic writers given the keys to canon, their major contribution was a subplot that explicitly made Element Lad gay. Mike Grell, a professional artist who got paid to work on the series, did vaguely porno-ish fan art. Again, it’s hard to tell where the pros started and the fandom ended; the inmates were running the asylum.

Mostly, Legion earned this devotion because it could reward it in a way no other comic could. Because Legion was not a wide market comic but was bought by a core audience, after a point, there were no self-contained one-and-done Legion stories. In fact, there weren’t even really arcs as we know it, which is why Legion always has problems getting reprinted in trade form. Legion was plotted like a daytime soap opera: there were always five different stories going on in every issue, and a comic involved cutting between them. Sure, like daytime soap operas, there’s never a beginning, just endless middles, so it was totally impossible for a newbie to jump on board…but soap operas know what they are doing: long term storytelling rewards a long term reader.

This brings me to today, where Legion is no longer being published by DC. There is no discussion about a movie or TV revival. This is amazing. Comics are a world where the tiniest nerd groups get pandered to: Micronauts, Weirdworld, Seeker 3000, and Rom have had revival series, for pete’s sake. It’s incredible there’s no discussion of a film or TV treatment, either; friggin Cyborg from New Teen Titans is getting a solo movie. 

Why did Legion stop being such a big deal? Where did the fandom that supported it dissolve to? One word: X-Men. Legion was incredibly ahead of its time. In the 60s and 70s, there were barely any “fan” comics, since superhero comics were like animation is today: mostly aimed at kids, with a minority of discerning adult/teen fans, and it was success among kids, not fans, that led to something being a top seller (hence, “fan favorites” in the 1970s, as surprising as it is to us today, often did not get a lot of work, like Don MacGregor or Barry Smith). But as newsstands started to push comics out, the fan audience started to get bigger and more important…everyone else started to catch up to the things that made Legion unique: most comics started to have attractive people who paired up into couples and/or love triangles, and featured extremely byzantine long term storytelling. If Legion of Super-Heroes is going to be remembered for anything, it’s for being the smaller scale “John the Baptist” to the phenomenon of X-Men, the ultimate “fan” comic.

The other thing that killed Legion, apart from Marvel’s Merry Mutants, that is, was the r-word: reboots. A reboot only works for some properties, but not others. You reboot something when you want to find something for a mass audience to respond to, like with Zorro, Batman, or Godzilla.

Legion, though, was not a comic for everybody, it was a fanboy/girl comic beloved by a niche who read it for continuing stories and minutiae (and to jack off, and in some cases, jill off). Rebooting a comic like that is a bad idea. You do not reboot something where the main way you engage with the property, the greatest strength, is the accumulated lore and history. Rebooting a property like that means losing the reason people like it, and unless it’s something with a wide audience, you only lose fans and won’t get anything in return for it. So for something like Legion (small fandom obsessed with long form plots and details, but unlike Trek, no name recognition) a reboot is the ultimate Achilles heel that shatters everything, a self-destruct button they kept hitting over and over and over until there was nothing at all left.


E. E. Smith’s Lensman Novels

The Lensman series is like Gil Evans’s jazz: it’s your grandparents’ favorite thing that you’ve never heard of. 

I mean, have you ever wondered exactly what scifi fandom talked about before the rise of the major core texts and cultural objects (Star Trek, Asimov, etc)? Well, it was this. Lensmen was the subject of fanfiction mailed in manilla envelopes during the 30s, 40s, and 50s (some of which are still around). If you’re from Boston, you might recognize that the two biggest and oldest scifi cons there going back to the 1940s, Boskone (Boscon, get it?) and Arisia, are references to the Lensman series. This series not only created space opera as we know it, but contributed two of the biggest visuals in scifi, the interstellar police drawn from different alien species, and space marines in power armor.

My favorite sign of how big this series was and how fans responded to it, was a great wedding held at Worldcon that duplicated Kimball Kinnison and Clarissa’s wedding on Klovia. This is adorable:

The basic story is pure good vs. evil: galactic civilization faces a crime and piracy wave of unprecedented proportions from technologically advanced pirates (the memory of Prohibition, where criminals had superior firearms and faster cars than the cops, was strong by the mid-1930s). A young officer, Kimball Kinnison (who speaks in a Stan Lee esque style of dialogue known as “mid-century American wiseass”), graduates the academy and is granted a Lens, an object from an ancient mystery civilization, who’s true purpose is unknown.

Lensman Kinnison discovers that the “crime wave” is actually a hostile invasion and assault by a totally alien culture that is based on hierarchy, intolerant of failure, and at the highest level, is ruled by horrifying nightmare things that breathe freezing poison gases. Along the way, he picks up allies, like van Buskirk, a variant human space marine from a heavy gravity planet who can do a standing jump of 20 feet in full space armor, Worsel, a telepathic dragon warrior scientist with the technical improvisation skills of MacGyver (who reads like the most sadistically minmaxed munchkinized RPG character of all time), and Nandreck, a psychologist from a Pluto-like planet of selfish cowards.

The scale of the conflict starts small, just skirmishes with pirates, but explodes to near apocalyptic dimensions. This series has space battles with millions of starships emerging from hyperspacial tubes to attack the ultragood Arisians, homeworld of the first intelligent race in the cosmos. By the end of the fourth book, there are mind battles where the reflected and parried mental beams leave hundreds of innocent bystanders dead. In the meantime we get evil Black Lensmen, the Hell Hole in Space, and superweapons like the Negasphere and the Sunbeam, where an entire solar system was turned into a vacuum tube.

It’s not hard to understand why Lensmen faded in importance. While the alien Lensmen had lively psychologies, Lensman Kimball Kinnison was not an interesting person, and that’s a problem when scifi starts to become more about characterization. The Lensman books, with their love of police and their sexism (it is an explicit plot point that the Lens is incompatible with female minds – in canon there are no female Lensmen) led to it being judged harshly by the New Wave writers of the 1960s, who viewed it all as borderline fascist military-scifi establishment hokum, and the reputation of the series never recovered from the spirit of that decade.


Prisoner of Zenda

Prisoner of Zenda is a novel about a roguish con-man who visits a postage-stamp, charmingly picturesque Central European kingdom with storybook castles, where he finds he looks just like the local king and is forced to pose as him in palace intrigues. It’s a swashbuckling story about mistaken identity, swordfighting, and intrigue, one part swashbuckler and one part dark political thriller.

The popularity of this book predates organized fandom as we know it, so I wonder if “fandom” is even the right word to use. All the same, it inspired fanatical dedication from readers. There was such a popular hunger for it that an entire library could be filled with nothing but rip-offs of Prisoner of Zenda. If you have a favorite writer who was active between 1900-1950, I guarantee he probably wrote at least one Prisoner of Zenda rip-off (which is nearly always the least-read book in his oeuvre). The only novel in the 20th Century that inspired more imitators was Sherlock Holmes. Robert Heinlein and Edmond “Planet Smasher” Hamilton wrote scifi updates of Prisoner of Zenda. Doctor Who lifted the plot wholesale for the Tom Baker era episode, “Androids of Tara,” Futurama did this exact plot too, and even Marvel Comics has its own copy of Ruritania, Doctor Doom’s Kingdom of Latveria. Even as late as the 1980s, every kids’ cartoon did a “Prisoner of Zenda” episode, one of the stock plots alongside “everyone gets hit by a shrink ray” and the Christmas Carol episode.

Prisoner of Zenda imitators were so numerous, that they even have their own Library of Congress sub-heading, of “Ruritanian Romance.” 

One major reason that Prisoner of Zenda fandom died off is that, between World War I and World War II, there was a brutal lack of sympathy for anything that seemed slightly German, and it seems the incredibly Central European Prisoner of Zenda was a casualty of this. Far and away, the largest immigrant group in the United States through the entire 19th Century were Germans, who were more numerous than Irish or Italians. There were entire cities in the Midwest that were two-thirds German-born or German-descent, who met in Biergartens and German community centers that now no longer exist.

Kurt Vonnegut wrote a lot about how the German-American world he grew up in vanished because of the prejudice of the World Wars, and that disappearance was so extensive that it was retroactive, like someone did a DC comic-style continuity reboot where it all never happened: Germans, despite being the largest immigrant group in US history, are left out of the immigrant story. The “Little Bohemias” and “Little Berlins” that were once everywhere no longer exist. There is no holiday dedicated to people of German ancestry in the US, the way the Irish have St. Patrick’s Day or Italians have Columbus Day (there is Von Steuben’s Day, dedicated to a general who fought with George Washington, but it’s a strictly Midwest thing most people outside the region have never heard of, like Sweetest Day). If you’re reading this and you’re an academic, and you’re not sure what to do your dissertation on, try writing about the German-American immigrant world of the 19th and 20th Centuries, because it’s a criminally under-researched topic.


A. Merritt

Pop quiz: who was the most popular and influential fantasy author during the 1930s and 40s? 

If you answered Tolkien or Robert E. Howard, you’re wrong - it was actually Abraham Merritt. He was the most popular writer of his age of the kind of fiction he did, and he’s since been mostly forgotten. Gary Gygax, creator of Dungeons and Dragons, has said that A. Merritt was his favorite fantasy and horror novelist.

Why did A. Merritt and his fandom go away, when at one point, he was THE fantasy author? Well, obviously one big answer was the 1960s counterculture, which brought different writers like Tolkien and Lovecraft to the forefront (by modern standards Lovecraft isn’t a fantasy author, but he was produced by the same early century genre-fluid effluvium that produced Merritt and the rest). The other answer is that A. Merritt was so totally a product of the weird occult speculation of his age that it’s hard to even imagine him clicking with audiences in other eras. His work is based on fringe weirdness that appealed to early 20th Century spiritualism and made sense at the time: reincarnation, racial memory, an obsession with lost race stories and the stone age, and weirdness like the 1920s belief that the Polar Arctic is the ancestral home of the Caucasian race. In other words, it’s impossible to explain Merritt without a ton of sentences that start with “well, people in the 1920s thought that…” That’s not a good sign when it comes to his universality. 


That’s it for now. Do you have any suggestions on a dead fandom, or do you keep one of these “dead” fandoms alive in your heart?

... And Action! (Bill Skarsgard X Reader)

anonymous requested: Oi ! i really like ur writings and was wondering if you do bill skarsgard/pennywise stuff ? if you do can you write a oneshot where Y/N plays the older sister (like shes in her twenties or smth) of beverly and pennywise kills her ? but Bill Skarsgard (he plays Pennywise) has a thing for Y/N and really hopes to impress her but it kinda goes wrong in someway ? idek but it’s been a idea i’ve had for ages ! thankss !  

Warnings: Spoilers -? Maybe? IT is a horror movie so, murder and choking. Also brief brief brief topics of vomit.

Word Count: 1880

A/N: I’m fully aware this is one shot is a bit bizarre and definitely a specific niche (not one that I share necessarily) but I feel like I need to preface this by saying this is simply just for fun. PSA Bev Marsh doesn’t have an older sister Y/N’s role is purely for this work

Originally posted by romanandme

Ever since Y/N got the call telling her she, Y/N L/N, was to play the part of Laura Marsh, her stomach still hasn’t unfolded itself. It was still all balled up in the pit of her lower abdomen, like she could hurl at any time. It had been there through the three months of filming they had done and she concluded that it would probably never leave.

Her character didn’t play much of a part in the loser’s club, but Y/N’s character was given her own story in the film. She was Laura Marsh, the real town ‘slut’  even though she often used her little sister Bev as a scapegoat. She hung out with Patrick Hocksetter and Henry Bower, and was usually one of Bev and the loser’s tormentors. Laura was a bitch by all standards of convention, even Y/N could admit, which was her death scene was supposed to be simultaneously terrifying and reliving.  

Y/N watched as the loser’s from her black chair as they played hand games and laughed together on the pavement. The blacktop was so hot! She thought, how the hell did they stand it? Y/N technically had only stopped being a kid three years ago (she was 21 now) but she still could never remember a time where she was so uncaring.

“Do ya’ know when they’re gonna start already? Jesus lets just get on with the scene already!” The slightly squeaky voice of Nicholas Hamilton (Henry Bowers) abruptly asked beside her. Three months ago she would’ve jumped, but now she didn’t even think about it. She heard a chair scraping against the ground and it groaned with the weight of Nick’s body. She turned and smiled at him, placing her thick and annotated script onto her lap. He was wearing an orange wife beater tanktop and Y/N could see redness on his shoulders beginning to form.

“Whoa I die in this scene! You want me gone that much, huh?” Y/N asked, feigning hurt as she chuckled lightly. It was the most unfortunate death for poor Laura Marsh, first she was kissed and then left by her boyfriend (which just so happened to be Henry Bowers) in the sewers of all places, then she was brutally ripped apart by a clown wearing his face. Y/N knew that the younger actor was anxious for his first on-screen make out (he had told her so time and time again) but she hoped the playful conversation would calm his nerves.  

Y/N was nervous too but for a different reason entirely. She was an experience actress, she had crossed all the necessary rights of passage, yet she was so nervous. Y/N had talked to Bill Skarsgard twice and she couldn’t shake her stupid, girlish crush. She hardly knew the guy for fuck’s sake! She had wanted so much to come from this movie, It was her first big production movie, but now she was most certainly gonna screw up. How the hell could she pretend to be terrified of the guy when she was secretly thinking ‘I want you to rub my mouth on your mouth’?

“No! No!” Nick assured, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “It’s not the death I’m looking forward to,” he whispered under his breath not so subtly. A few moments of hot silence followed before he reached over and grabbed the script from Y/N’s lap. He lazily fanned himself with it boyishly.

“You’ve got another coupla scenes after this so it’s not like you’re not going anywhere!” He joked as he tried in vain to cool himself off. His voice was shaking slightly and his laughs were constrained, like he wasn’t breathing in enough. Y/N cocked her eyebrow and waited for a few seconds before she made a lunge for her script. She, of course, missed it and hit her elbow on the wooden arm rest of his chair.

“C’mon why do you carry this thing anyhow? Everyone knows you memorized this thing cover to cover the instant you got it.” Nick teased stretching his arm away from Y/N as he peered at all of her highlights and somewhat embarrassing notes.

Y/N tried to crack a smile, but it was true, she did take it everywhere. How could she not? How else could she ensure she’d pull through? Besides was it so wrong for her to make sure everything went perfectly?

Nevertheless, she was beginning to suspect that Nick knew something that he shouldn’t, that sneaky little son of a bitch. She was about to reply with a typical snarky remark but she was interrupted by Andy (the director) shouting, “Y/N, Nick, and Bill - Scene 6 please!” Her heart sank as her body began to move without her brain’s consent. Nick had already jumped up and ran over to Andy enthusiastically. Meanwhile, Y/N’s thighs peeled up from her chair and she awkwardly waddled over to join them.

Andy took one glance at her before waving a makeup artist down and whispering in her ear. How ironic that this makeup artist looked like a scary clown herself, what with all that highlighter. The girl took a dry rag and began to dab Y/N’s face a bit, before she was pulled onto set by someone’s face she didn’t even get to see.

Nick grabbed Y/N’s hand and lightly guided her into position, awaiting Andy to shout “Action!” Y/N could still see the kids offscreen playing their hand games, but now one of them had begun throwing little balls of mud.  

“Alright! Is everyone in position?!” Andy asked looking around as if he were waiting for someone to point out a problem. He nodding to the man holding the slate, before loudly shouting “AND ACTION!”

Nick immediately pushed Y/N’s hips up against the walls of the sewers and she giggled obnoxiously. His lips roughly greeted hers in a strained, but very teenager, kiss. The kiss lasted only for a couple of seconds before he pulled away and wiped his mouth, following the script to a tee.

“You’re getting better.” He commented rudely and went back to give her another kiss. But Y/N’s character, Laura pushed his chest back, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Henry?” Y/N made sure to smack her lips together, to cock her head, and roll her eyes.

“It means that I thought sluts like you were supposedta’ be good at kissin’. But I guess sluts aren’t really known for their kissin’ anyways.” Again, Nick went in for a kiss, but Y/N pushed him back and feigned disbelief.  

Only open your mouth slightly, stop cocking your head, frown, stare, make your eyes water Y/N went through exactly what she had to do in the mirror time and time again, perfecting every part of her express- Crap, lower your chin and …. cry!

Nick glanced at her, though by now her character was balling. “You’re a fucking crazy bitch. You know that right? How much do you charge again?” He asked so sourly the words curdled in his mouth.

“Just get the fuck outta here!” Y/N yelled and she could see, out of her peripheral vision, Andy mouthing along to the words. Nick smirked evilly, before exiting the set and giving her an encouraging off screen thumbs up. Y/N slumped down and cried pathetically, just as it was written. But eventually she stood and stumbled around in the sewers, crying all the way. She could feel the presence of the camera over her shoulder as it followed her like a ghost. Abruptly, the sound of demonic laughter reverberated around the metal of the sewer hitting Y/N’s ears. Bill was too good at that. It made the hair on the back of her neck stand. Her character stopped walking and wiped her nose with the back of her cranberry colored sweatshirt.

A floating red balloon bobbed through the air as it came softly down to where Y/N was standing. It bobbed so peacefully (like the script had said), so her character tried to reach out to get it like a  young child. Perhaps poor slut Laura Marsh needed comfort too, Y/N pondered.

“AND PENNYWISE GO!” Andy shouted, marking where CGI would be used to create a horrifying, deformed hell version of Bill’s beautiful face. Y/N jumped and let out a throaty, raspy scream, the same scream she was hired for. She felt cold hands on her sweatshirt before she saw Bill, but once she did she couldn’t help to scream again. It was nightmarish, with his enlarged forehead and pointed smile.

The clown pinned Y/N up against the wall, which would’ve actually choked her if it had not been for the slight incline that let her tiptoes hang on. She gasped and sputtered, still crying and struggling pathetically. “HO HO HEHEHE!” The clown laughed in her ear and the sound shocked her so much that Y/N lost her footing, her toes couldn’t get a grip on the wet floor of the sewer. Bill was already so much taller than her at 6’4” that in order to deliver the lines properly, he had begun brought her up to his face. She gripped tightly onto his gloved hands as she coughed and began to feel a bit light headed as he continued to laugh maniacally.

Just kill me already! Y/N painfully thought, she would hate to be the reason for the failed take. But Pennywise, or Bill, never seemed to talk fast enough and Y/N was really beginning to feel the effects as she tried desperately to gulp in air.

“I - I,” Wheeze. “C-c-can’t-t,” Wheeze.  

Immediately like a switch had been pulled, she felt the pressure on her throat release as she fell to the ground into the disgusting water. She gulped in sweet air like she had never breathed before and Andy, god bless him, finally shouted “Cut!”

“Y/N! Are you alright!? I really didn’t mean to! I mean I thought maybe - but - I’m so sorry!” Pennywi- Bill shouted, helping her up by placing his hand on the small of her back. It was so odd hearing him be so gentle and polite while wearing such a terrifying costume. His eyes, which five seconds ago where full of such rage, now were softened and sad. “I can’t believe I didn’t notice,” Bill said exasperatedly and guided her over to where Andy sat, all the while she was still breathing in and out deeply.

“Y/N! Y/N! What happened!” Y/N heard the voices of the child actors as they ran over to inspect the situation.

“It was the heat you dufas!” One of the kids proclaimed obviously, as they patted her shoulder. But all Y/N could focus on was the sound of her heart beating as she panted heavily.

“I’m …  fine guys.” Y/N confirmed as she rubbed her neck tenderly. Now that she finally had air in her lungs, the pain of where Bill’s fingers had wrapped around her throat set in.

“I’m so sorry,” Bill repeated as he tried to give her kindest smile he could, buck tooth, blood drenched and everything.

His Mind Created the Perfect Metaphor

Dear BBC Sherlock community,

Ever since Sherlock series 4 came out, collectively we were like “what the HELL is this?!?! This doesn’t make any sense!” BUT after many months of tossing ideas around the fandom, we have made theories that could explain the weirdness, but nothing we can all agree on. Now, this meta here may be absolute garbage to you, but I believe, in my heart of hearts, I’ve solved it. Please read it in its entirety with an open mind before you reblog it just to tell me I suck.

Thanks in advance, you da best

Paige


Here’s the short version: Sherlock actually jumped at the end of The Reichenbach Fall, just as Doyle intended him to die. Gatiss and Moffat said they are correcting something in this adaptation that no one else has gotten right before. Many of us assumed the homosexual romance was the one thing they were changing, but we were punched in the face right after The Final Problem came out.  Gatiss and Moffat are changing the sacrifice. Holmes was intended to die for his friends but Doyle needed more money and rewrote the series after “The Final Problem”. That turned Holmes’ sacrifice into a cruel joke against Watson. This is what BBC Sherlock is fixing, and we’re about to see it come to fruition.

I know many theorists despise the homosexual reading of Holmes and Watson, while many people in general despise theorists on this site. That’s fine, I don’t care how people feel about gay theories and/or TJLC and its followers.  But I’m here to tell you TJLC, at its core as a concept, was right. You may hate Moffat and Gatiss, you may think Sherlock is a piece of shit show, and that’s fine, you do you. But hear this one meta out, please. I think even the hardest skeptic can at least apprectiate the thought and logic behind this.

Keep reading

Jackson Heights - Peter Parker

request -  Hey! I was wondering if you could write a fic where the reader is recruited to fight in civil war with Steve and she ends up fighting peter and while fighting they spark up a conversation and become friends? And then soon they become more than friends?

a/n - going back to peter in civil war and trying to bring out his more rookie/dorky side was fun but i went back and forth with a ton of ideas for this fic, i hope it turned out good enough and isn’t trash like me :( but don’t forget to request a fic if you’d like and follow!

The airport terminal was ripped into pieces as the minutes went by. The battle between Stark and Rogers had spread like a disease, influencing the whole team to pick sides and fight until one victor remained. I was among that group, suddenly finding myself fighting against the people whom I held dearest to my heart, supposedly helping Captain in this messy situation.

My back was pressed up against Wanda’s, circling around to defy anyone that came near us. T’Challa had tried his best to come and toy with us, my spine shivering once I heard the claws come out of his suit and pounce towards Wanda and I, only to be stopped by the force of her hands. I watched as his body flew across the premise, landing on pieces of debris.

“(Y/N). Spider-Man coming for you from Eastside.” Carter said over the intercom.

“Spider what?” I furrowed my brows, turning around only to get swooped into the air.

Keep reading

Bruised (Richie/Eddie) 2/12

Summary: It’s 1993 and the summer from many years ago is dead and gone. Many have drifted apart from the Losers club and its at the point where there is no club at all. The atmosphere is cold just like the winter months and the only blushes to be found are the ones that are caused from the piercing spikes of cold that heat skin up. Being a teenage boy is hard; especially for the two boys that now count each other as strangers. In which both boys make a plan, but both disrupt each others.

Warning(s): Depression, angst and fluff throughout the whole series, suicide attempt

A/N: Im so happy at how much support part 1 got?? Thankyou all so so so fucking much ily all also!! credit to @finn-got-tall for an idea in one of the scenes!! (I wont reveal which scene bc i want people to just read) but ty lovely

Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12(Soon) | 

Eddie and Richie blinked at each other, stunned to see one another in such a strange coincidence. Eddie still had his hand up, but Richie still hadn’t took it. Richie merely brought his hand up that held the cigarette, taking a drag and allowing the toxic waste to decay against his lungs. Eddie visibly cringed at the sight, but stayed silent; he only continued to watch in hope that Richie would somehow step down. Richie took away the small stick, blowing the smoke out slowly and staring at Eddie through his large obnoxious eye glasses.

“Why are you here, Eds?” Richie asked, as if a day hadn’t passed since they last talked.

Keep reading

The Wrong Number

Jensen Ackles x Reader

Summary : you accidentally texted the wrong person one night who happens to be a major celebrity. And from that day on, you two can’t seem to stop talking to each other.

Read Part One Here

A/N : SO many of you asked for a part two, so here it is!! I hope you all enjoy!!

Warning ; language?

Work had been such a pain in the ass this entire week. You were exhausted and annoyed, and part of you wanted to quit.

But it was your dream. Even if you were playing as assistant for now, you knew it would all be worth it in the end.

Luckily you had someone to keep you from going crazy.

Jensen had texted you almost every single day since you had accidentally texted him instead of your best friend, Bonnie.

He was the only thing that you looked forward too. Which you weren’t sure if that was a good or bad thing.

Having someone to vent too, talk to about anything and not feel judged. It was beyond the best feeling in the world. It almost felt like you had known him forever.

But tonight, you two planned to finally FaceTime each other.

No more hiding behind texts.

You were kind of nervous, but also excited. To talk to the actor you had crushed on forever. It all felt so surreal.

Laying in bed, you saw your phone light up and his name appear on the screen. Immediately your stomac fluttered.

“You got this.” You whispered to yourself.

You gently pressed the green button answer the call, and breathed in a sharp breath.

Once the picture cleared, and you were finally able to see his face, you Felt like you were on cloud nine.

Jensen had a big smile on his face, as he looked at his screen. There you were on his phone. No longer a still picture that he looked at almost everyday. You were mesmerizing to say the least, breath taking.

He was excited and nervous about this moment since you agreed to FaceTime the night before. It was the only thing he could think about, which kept messing him up during his scenes.

“Your voice is a lot higher than I imagined.” You chuckled. “I guess I was expecting Dean’s voice.”

Jensen belted out into laughter, his head cocking back. Once he was able to compose himself, he cleared his throat. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He said, making his voice low.

After a while, you both went back and forth for what seemed like an eternity. He talked about his life as an actor and how much he enjoyed it. And you talked about your life.

There was never a dull moment which was weird since you were used to those awkward pauses and short conversations with the guys you dated.

“Okay-” you said, laying on your side as you plopped your phone down beside you, with a pillow holding it up so you didn’t have to use your hand. “What’s your favorite prank you’ve done on set?”

Jensen purses his lips and thought just for a second before remembering the craziest thing he had done.

“Well this one time, Jared and I wanted to mess with the new guy, which in this case was misha.” He said. “Well while he was taking a shower in his trailer, Jared and I snuck in, took all of his clothes and towels and left an elephant g-string. Let’s just say, he wasn’t too thrilled.”

“Oh my god.” You laughed so hard, your entire body was shaking. Your stomach constricted and you couldn’t stop.

Jensen watched you through his screen, admiring the pure sound of your laughter. He decided to take a screenshot, to remember this moment forever.

“Oh my god!” You said once again. “I can only imagine what he looked like.”

“Yeah–"he chuckled. “Wasn’t a pretty sight.” 
Jensen leaned back in his chair, and rubbed his eyes as he yawned. Tilting his head back.

“Tired, old man?” You teased. 
He returned his gaze back to his screen, and flashed a smirk. “Just a little.”

“I can go so you can get some sleep.”

Jensen sighed, wishing to see you in person. To feel you and actually meet you. It’s only been two weeks, but it’s been the best two weeks of his life. No one has ever made him feel the way you made him feel. It was strange. 
He didn’t want to hang up, let alone stop talking to you. If he could, he would stay on the phone forever.

“Not yet.” He said. “I don’t want to say bye yet.” 
Your lips curved into a soft smile, feeling your stomach flutter.

“Me neither.” You muttered.

Jensen walked over to his bed, and laid down. His body resting into the mattress.

This was the moment he was going to cherish forever. The first night you two actually spoke to each other, and it was everything he imagined and more.

“Comfortable?” You asked.

He smiled. “Yeah, feels good to finally lay in bed.”

“I know what you mean.” You chuckled. “I look forward to it every day.”

“Well now you have something else to look forward too.” He said.

You cocked your brow, intrigued by his statement. “Oh yeah? What else do I have to look forward too?”

“Me.”

—–

Part Three

okay, can we talk about keith’s vlog tho? because all i see right now is that “we already have too much keith” and it makes me mad so i need to rant. here we go.

first of all, coran was so happy that he set up this system so he and the team could record vlogs and maybe talk about fun things and stuff like that. but keith lived on a desert for so long he didn’t even know what “fun” is at this point and he’s not the kind of person that would talk simply to fill the silence. so of course when you tell him to sit in front of the camera and talk, he will finally just say whatever is on his mind. and he starts to talk about being half-galra? 

like, it’s on his mind all the time; not only that he’s not 100% human but also that because of who he is allura hated him and other altea people would probably feel the same. most of the time keith acts like he doesn’t care about anyone but maybe shiro, but the truth is he cares so much? about what allura thinks, about what hunk thinks. he just bottles it up like everything else.

and then the “vol- tron” scene with lance. keith still thinks about that! he’s frustrated because a stupid chant shouldn’t be this complicated but keith thinks it’s important to lance. he doesn’t understand even tho he wants to! i don’t know, i just felt like pointing this out because of Reasons. 

and then probably the most important part. where keith talks about how his mom left him and that’s the reason he has trust issues. like, holy shit, of course you’d have trust issues and if i’ll ever see one more person getting mad at keith for being angry about shiro’s disappearance, i’m throwing hands. both his parents apparently didn’t give a damn about him and shiro was the only person he had, he was and is his only family so of course keith was angry. and in this last part of his vlog we saw how vulnerable he really is, he opened up so much i was surprised because keith is usually a very reserved person when it comes to his feelings, so i think that we saw more character development in those three minutes than in the whole show and it’s important! 

so if you think that it was a waste of time and they’re “shoving keith down your throat” (i saw someone saying that here on tumblr) then i hope you’ll choke on him, because honestly? keith is one of the more interesting characters in the show both because of his backstory and behavior/development. 

so do i think that the other characters deserve more screentime too? of course! matt fucking holt is my fave character so you don’t get to talk to me about too little screentime. but do i think that they should stop giving us more keith content and that it’s okay to insult keith because of the amount of time he’s getting? well, let me tell you that this is bullshit. 

The Destiel blanket of 13x01

So… I’m rewatching 13x01 and I just have to say. Wow.

Dabb has no chill.

I know I’ve said this a lot but come on, I mean COME ON Dabb. I watch this episode and see all the other excellent meta and plot points of course, but over the top of it is just this blanket of Destiel that affects pretty much every other meta reading in some way or another but especially around Dean and especially when you put it back into chronological order. You can see how the grief over Cas specifically leads his story forwards in this episode and how this will affect him moving forwards and…I’m just stupidly in love with this episode.

There is an undercurrent of Dean’s feelings for Cas present throughout this whole episode, strongly romantic in the Dean scenes and present as a plot mirror even in scenes that Dean is not in. This is the episode that sets up the season. This is the episode that sets up Dean’s arc for the season and in the future, it takes what has been built in the last 12 years subtextually, textualises it and is the foundation for the season to move forwards.

I just… I want to wrap myself in a blanket but I feel like I have to write about the Destiel blanket over this whole episode that tore my heart out and left me needing my own blanket to curl up in a ball on the sofa so, here goes :)

We have an opening sequence that parallels Sam/Eileen again to Dean/Cas and the music, dammit the MUSIC. Literally in the first few seconds of the season we have “Nothing Else Matters”, a Metallica ballad, referring back to Dean in season 1 and linking it to later aspects of Dean’s character growth. Metallica is a part of his performance facade from 1x04, the “scared of flying so humms Metallica” episode, they then show Dean literally blowing down the metaphorical walls of the bunker whilst “never opened myself this way” plays over the top. I MEAN COME ON!

So, performing!Dean’s facade coming down and parallels to the canon romantic couple (and Chuck dammit Dabb you are bringing Eileen back or so help me). 

We end the sequence with this 

Just to remind us, you know, that this is Dean’s key emotional drive for the episode and season.

We then start with Jack/Sam and this again, of course

Dean’s face goes from grief to angry determination. He runs in and immediately tries to shoot Jack in the face. This is the set up of his emotional arc over 01-06. He is angry and enraged because of his grief. This is not a good hark back to good old Dean hunting and being badass, this is utterly devastating.

At this point he’s enraged, sure, he can barely say what happened, but he does. Because he still has a smidgen of hope that there could be a way back. He doesn’t want to face the fact that he might be gone for good yet so he’s just angry that he’s dead in the first place and wants revenge on Jack who did this.

So then we have the search for Jack. But after the prayer scene which chronologically happens here, we see the shift from rage to despair after his prayer goes unanswered. 

We had grief then rage 

And now…hopelessness.

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Duo - Peter Parker

request -  okay so y/n is part of the avengers (she’s peter’s age) & peter does something that practically kills him. y/n freaks out & goes to hold him while the rest of the avengers just watch her in pity. they take peter & tell y/n to go cool down. and then when peter wakes up, he is sternly told by tony to go see y/n before she goes crazy. sorry this is long & specific ❤️ love your writing btw!! one of my favorite blogs

a/n - i had went back and forth with a lot of ideas on this fic, and i really hope it doesn’t seem rushed and i hope it turned out okay and not a flop like me :( but don’t forget to request a peter parker/spider-man fic if you want and follow!

Another building came down to the ground as another crowd ran from the scene, only being able to hear their own screams as the enemy came to terrorize New York. It was only another work of Hydra, trying to come and ruin the lifestyle that so many people have made here. It was fight, after fight, after fight, after fight, and I didn’t know if I could take it anymore.

Peter and I, both natives of Queens, and also the youngest on the team. When Peter and I had first arrived to Headquarters, Captain didn’t hesitate to warn us that most enemies target the younger party the most, and that the rest of the team would prioritize the safety of Peter and I before their own.

Today’s situation seemed to be a bit more difficult than the others, from when I looked up and saw Tony struggling to keep another part of a building from falling to when I saw Natasha almost beaten by one of Hydra’s minions. Something about today was just a bit, off.

“(Y/N)!” I heard Rogers call. I turned around to see his shield coming my way, gripping it tightly and slamming it into the bodies of Hydra’s concoctions. They were out within a second, having me throw the shield back to Rogers. He then ran off with Clint, leaving myself and Wanda to deal with the others.

“Where’s Parker?” Natasha spoke into the intercom. My heart dropped as I looked up and tried to find the boy, hoping to see a spot of red and blue anywhere. I turned around as my last hope, calming down when I saw him swinging from one building to the other, coming closer to the scene.

“Southside on 54th, coming right this way.” I said.

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important points from the podcast w/ Chris Salih (longest list ever) (n it gets sad)
  • https://soundcloud.com/21pilotspodcast
  • he first met tyler when tyler was graduating highschool
  • tyler would literally create his songs by singing into a laptop’s mic
  • chris met josh at guitar center
  • tyler had never been in an actual studio before he went to chris’s
  • he. talked. about. the. taco. bell. saga.
  • chris and tyler wanted to start a band but “two people don’t make a band”
  • Self-Titled was written in tyler, chris’s and nick’s shared basement.
  • there were no live drums in Self-Titled… just programmed ones (i personally had no idea WHOA)
  • ideas from self-titled were recycled into blurryface!
  • the band name was almost “Bicycle Thief” or “Chill Coat”!!!!
  • they would go through the newspaper or captchas on ticketmaster to see any cool word combinations that would be good band names
  • the live show, as said by tyler a thousand times, was the most important part of gaining a fanbase
  • nick had to learn to play the bass as the band progressed
  • they used to have their programmed backup music stream from an ipod during the shows (and sometimes they still come up on shuffle when Chris is listening to music)
  • the piano tyler plays is actually a keyboard inserted into an old piano that chris gutted and repaired
  • ode to sleep was one out of three of the options for the name of the song, but most of the fans voted for ode to sleep, so that became the name
  • TOP played RAB songs at concerts before the album was released
  • Chris had to quit TOP to pay off student loans and fix his car. “everyone has this dream of being a rockstar, and it doesn’t always happen.” (so sad)
  • an argument with tyler over whether or not to play at a college campus was the final straw for Chris.
  • leaving twenty one pilots broke Chris’s heart: he cared so, so much about the band.
  • after chris quit, tyler and josh played for a full year, still not knowing if the band would work out
  • chris had no desire to leave the band.
  • tyler felt like his band had given up on him. he was devastated.
  • “if twenty one pilots is going to be successful, it can be successful without me. i know i will always be part of the band.”
  • tyler: “josh and i thought about quitting multiple times that year.”
  • tyler felt let down and abandoned.
  • (tyler texted him while he was talking about him LOL)
  • tyler and josh met at chris’s house after chris fell asleep. tyler went with josh to church the following day, to see him play in the church band, where before and after the service they were playing TOP music. tyler started going to that church. 
  • josh would go to the shows and go hang out with tyler afterwards.
  • josh was about to move to nashville to make a push in the drumming industry.
  • chris took josh to lunch and convinced him to be the drummer of TOP
  • Nick still works for Josh and Tyler!!! I thought he had disappeared!
  • chris was the behind-the-scenes guy on a lot of the stuff they were working on & was still a huge driving force in the band
  • Michael! Snyder! Mark! I Miss Them!
  • tyler likes the Killers and Coldplay and was influenced by Bob Marley
  • they almost had a second keyboardist in the band!
  • Chris is super bothered when people ask him/tell him that he regrets leaving the band because their famous now. it drives him crazy. “how would you like it if i made fun of your personal life?”
  • “people will eventually forget what twenty one pilots is. people will say that is a “used to” or “was band at one time” 
  • it’s hard for tyler and jenna to even walk down the street or go to dinner because of they attention they receive. it’s really hard on them.
  • Chris gets a LOT of crap online, and he wishes it would stop.
  • NICK IS GONNA BE ON THE NEXT EPISODE!
(INTERVIEW) 170825 How EXO's 'The War' Came Together: A Song-By-Song Breakdown With the Band, Its Producers & More

A behind-the-scenes look at what went into making summer’s hottest K-pop album.

From the frenetic synths of “Going Crazy” to the dreamlike melodies of “Walk on Memories,” EXO’s latest album, The War, held nothing back from fans. Pulling inspiration from funk, reggae, EDM, trap and more, then weaving it all together through top-notch production, it proved a logical progression in their sonic journey and a summer-friendly successor to the group’s darker previous album, Ex'Act.

With The War, EXO topped Billboard’s World Albums chart for two consecutive weeks and went on to sell over 1 million copies globally, proving that the EXO-L fandom is sticking around for the boy band’s evolution.

Learn what went into the hottest K-pop album of the summer from the members themselves and some of the producers behind its hottest tracks.

“Ko Ko Bop”

Chen: [The members and I] wrote the lyrics separately and worked on putting the lyrics together for the song afterwards. We worked on the song using a special method, where we gathered all three of our lyrics for the song and selected which lyrics would suit the song the best. I don’t think I have any regrets or wish that it could have better since it’s the best result produced through all the effort that our members and other various writers have put into the process. Through the lyrics, I wanted “Ko Ko Bop” to have people shake off all their stress and enjoy themselves just as who they are.

Baekhyun: I felt that a lot of our fans were unable to fully enjoy our concerts or performances because they’re conscious of what others would think. Since “Ko Ko Bop” is a reggae and EDM genre and it’s easy to groove to, I wanted my lyrics to have people to become more carefree, release their stress and dance away with the music.

“Touch It”

Chen: My imagination provides the most inspiration for the lyrics. For “Touch It,” I played out the lyrics in my mind as if it is like a scene from a movie when writing it. After completing the draft, I worked on it by fixing awkward pronunciations by singing along the lyrics with the music. This helped me figure out more suitable and comfortable words that would enhance the groove when listening to the song.

“Chill”

Chanyeol: Usually it’s common to work on the lyrics based on a demo guide, but for the song “Chill” I worked on the lyrics with an empty track without demo lyrics. I think that’s part of the reason why the lyrics were able to come out pretty naturally.

👉 Read more on billboard’s website

Transference (M) – Chapter 07

cr. [X] 

Summary: You and Hoseok struggle separately to process what has transpired between you.

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 7,733

Warning: Tantric!Hoseok, therapist/client relationship, mentions of alcohol, profanity.

A/N:  This chapter contains both the Reader and Hoseok’s POV and will be labeled whenever it switches. It’s a sad one, but necessary for the rest of the series. Hope you enjoy!

Chapters: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07

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9

I was lucky enough to attend the Pacific Rim: Uprising NYCC panel at Madison Square Garden (and sat in the first row ayyy~~) and took a bunch of notes lol. The panel included the director Steven S. DeKnight, and a few members of the main cast including John Boyega, Cailee Spaeny, Scott Eastwood, and Burn Gorman. Here’s my recap:

General Worldbuilding Tidbits

  • Pacific Rim: Uprising is set 10 years in the future after the last film. DeKnight said that they wanted to show a “new generation of Jaeger pilots who have known nothing but chaos.”
  • Previous characters slated to return, as seen by the trailer, include Mako Mori (Rinko Kikuchi), Dr. Hermann Gottlieb (Burn Gorman), and Dr. Newt Geiszler (Charlie Day).
  • The new main “trio” seems to consists of the main lead, Jake Pentecost, and the late son of Stacker Pentecost (John Boyega), Jake’s best friend and Jaeger pilot Nate Lambert (Scott Eastwood), and tech-savvy Amara Namani (Cailee Spaeny). 
  • 10 years later, the Pan-Pacific Defense Corps (PPDC) has come together to work as an international fighting force, with all of humanity working together - i.e. Jaegers are no longer coded by specific country, like the Russian Jaegers, Australian Jaegers, etc. 
  • This also allowed the opportunity to build Jaegers from the ground up, since they were all previously destroyed in the first film. It was jokingly claimed, “we cancelled the apocalypse and then un-cancelled it to make this movie.”
  • DeKnight discussed how  Del Toro originally set the table with Pacific Rim as a “fantastic visual feast,” so the goal with the sequel was to honor the original, but also expand the universe at the same time. 
  • John Boyega claimed that they weren’t trying to “rewrite what Guillermo Del Toro did, but rather to build upon and expand this universe, and where the humans are at now.”
  • Boyega also talked about how he came onto work behind-the-scenes creatively on the film as a producer. He described Pacific Rim as one of the only franchises he’s come across where the fans are hopeful and “sacred science fiction ground." 
  • Going in, Boyega felt like he had the same creative passion as DeKnight. When they met in LA for the first time, they went over the specific Jaegers and basically what Boyega wanted to see after Pacific Rim. He claimed that "I believe this is everything you want Pacific Rim to be." 
  • One of the goals of Pacific Rim: Uprising is to explain exactly what happened 10 years after the first film, but not necessarily be a complete detachment to the origin story. It was highlighted that there are a lot of young teenage characters in the cast and hopefully that’ll be something that new viewers can relate to. 
  • According to DeKnight, one of the overarching themes of Pacific Rim is: "It doesn’t matter who your parents are, the color of your skin, your religion, or sexual orientation, you can make a difference and be a hero. It’s the human inside the Jaegers that makes you super." 
  • Pacific Rim: Uprising was filmed both in Australia and China. The cast pretty much agreed that as a director, DeKnight runs a "relaxed” and “creative” set - it was a tough schedule, but the actors all felt that they could still have creative input.

New Jaegers

  • DeKnight called them all “badass,” with Gipysy Avenger leading the charge.
  1. Gipsy Avenger: Has a lot of upgrades, including a Gravity Sling which allows the Jaeger to reach out and grab buildings, cars, etc. and hurl them directly at the Kaiju.
  2. Bracer Phoenix: This is the brute force Jaeger. One of its special abilities, above many, is the fact that it’s a three-pilot machine. Therefore, the third pilot can drop into the chamber and operate a pair of massive guns called the Vortex Cannon.
  3. Saber Athena: This is the most advanced Jaeger in the fleet that uses Plasma swords. Also described as a “little experimental,”  and “incredibly swift.”
  4. Titan Redeemer: Has a special weapon called the “ball of death,” which is attached to the end of his arm. According to DeKnight, this was “pretty damn cool." 
  5. Guardian Bravo: Is another brute force Jaeger that has a special weapon called the "graphine arc whip." 
  6. Scrapper: Described as a "little guy,” that’s been slapped together. Since in the future, there are a lot of people pilfering and stealing PPCD technology to make their own Jaegers. 
  • During the Q&A, an audience member asked if all the new Jeagers run on analog. DeKnight claimed one Jaeger is built on sticks (lmao), but the general idea is that no EM-powered Kaijus will be able to take down the Jaegers in this film.

Jake Pentecost (John Boyega)

  • Boyega stated that he “loved the first movie and one of the reasons was Idris Elba.” So, he understood the big shoes that he had to fill. Boyega claimed he understood this responsibility, but  "we [the cast] all worked as a unit, and Jake Pentecost doesn’t exist without the other characters. This is also a great ensemble piece.“
  • When the moderator asked if Jake is trying to live up to Sacker’s legacy, Boyega jokingly claimed: "Hell no!” He went to explain that “the greatest heroes don’t accept legendary status. It takes a tussle and a turn and for Jake’s position. Where we find Jake in the beginning of the film is in very different circumstances from his Dad.”
  • Boyega described Jake as a “stealer, a hustler, and lives in half a mansion. He’s really a guy that doesn’t want to live up to the Pentecost name.”
  • Jake is bought back into the PPCD in a very unique way through his connection to Cailee Spaeny’s character Amara. So, Jake is bought into this adventure and decides that he’s gotta “step up,” after realizing that the “Pentecost name still means something to people." 
  • During the Q&A, an audience member asked Boyega what’s the most rewarding part of being a sci-fi icon. He claimed that he doesn’t feel like one, but working on both Pacific: Rim Uprising has been exciting, since it’s allowed him to jump into various elements of sci-fi that he loved growing up.

Nate Lambert (Scott Eastwood)

  • Eastwood described him as a Jaeger pilot who’s one of the best out there. Yet, he’s still "the tip of the spear,” and really nothing without his best friend Jake.
  • Jake and Nate still have issues in this movie to work out from the past, so Eastwood felt that coming back around and dealing with a lost time with these characters was something cool to explore as an actor. 
  • Eastwood also emphasized that while yes, there is plenty of action in the film, it “has a great story first and foremost.”

Amara Namani (Cailee Spaeny)

  • This was Spaeny’s first film that she was ever cast for. So, she was definitely intimidated and a bit terrified, but knew that fans were so supportive of the first film. 
  • Spaeny didn’t actually watch Pacific Rim until she got the audition for the sequel, and really took it upon herself to dive into the universe in order to understand and respect the original film.  
  • In terms of Spaeny’s film experience, there was also diving into tons of stunts and action and lots of skills that she to catch onto , since she was participating in a whole world that’s already been created. 
  • But Spaeny felt that both DeKnight and the cast were very supportive and helpful, whenever she had questions, so it was really easy for her to dive into Cailee’s character. She also bonded with DeKnight since this was the first feature-length, theatrical film that he ever directed. 
  • Spaeny described Amara as very “independent,” and super “badass.” She’s also a tech-savvy person. 
  • For Amara’s backstory, her entire family was killed in the first wave of Kaiju attacks. So, Amara really “takes it upon herself to dive into Jaeger tech and make sure that when Kaiju do come back, she’ll be ready to fight and protect herself." 
  • While Amara’s past is very different from Jake’s, Spaeny claimed that both of them still see a lot of things in similar ways.  

Dr. Hermann Gottlieb (Burn Gorman)

  • Gorman said he was very excited to be back in the sequel, which felt like "being back in the playground.” He also joked, "I’ve been lucky enough with this face that God gave me to play a few jerks on screen,” when an audience member briefly highlighted his past roles on Torchwood, Revenge, Game of Thrones, and The Dark Knight Rises. 
  • Gottlieb still has problems with personal hygiene. Gorman claimed, “let’s just say that he hasn’t changed his socks since the last film." 
  • In comparison to Charlie Day’s character (Dr. Newt Geiszler) who has moved onto the private sector, Gottlieb chose to stay behind with the PPCD and arguably their most important scientist at the highest level at this point. So, Gorman joked that Gottlieb now, in effect, has a "really great budget,” to work with now. 
  • However, DeKnight makes it clear that where we find Gottlieb is: “as a man still very much affected in what happened in the previous film in terms of his drift and communication with the Kaiju.

There was a brief Q&A and the last question really stuck out to me, where an audience member asked each cast member to sum up their Pacific: Rim Uprising experience in one word:

  • John Boyega: Unity
  • Cailee Spaeny: Life-Changing
  • Scott Eastwood: International
  • Steve S. DeKnight: Mind-blowing

Someone raised the challenge to take the idea of the cult ending that was assembled from non-canon datamined content but figure out a way to reassemble it into something that’s both tonally in-line with the rest of the game and a satisfying cap to the story so I rose to the challenge because bouncing from springboards like this and connecting plot points is basically what I do for a living.

Also tried to find a way to include all the dads because these “bigger picture” stories are more fun like that.

Putting it under a cut for length and hella spoilers, but here’s my response to the question of “well how would YOU handle the cult end”

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Holy shit, the un-patched version of Prompto’s hotel scene is different towards the end lol Skip to 1:13 if you just wanna see the un-patched part since the first 1:12 is the part that’s in the game now.

Apparently when you get to the point where you press Prompto about what he wants to talk about, in the un-patched version of the game the dialogue is completely different towards the end. Prompto doesn’t do the whole “happy go lucky joker…I’m desperate to earn my place” monologue.

I put both versions of the scene together in one clip so people could see the difference. I started it at the part where it changes (you can even see the choices you say are different…express interest in the patched version vs comfort him in the un-patched) and cut it off at the part where it becomes the same dialogue.

Prompto: And there were times when I felt, well, worthless.

Noctis: That’s what’s been bugging you?

Prompto: I mean, when you look at me you wouldn’t think that I’m anything but  a fun-loving, happy-go-lucky joker. But that isn’t the real me. Behind all the quips and laughs, I’m a mess of hang-ups. I’ve always felt inferior to you guys. I’m not royalty, and I’m not strong, I’m nothing, really. Unlike Gladio, I’m not good with people. The way he connects with them, he’s operating on a different level. Unlike Ignis, I’m not smart and I can’t cook to save myself. But when we hang out, it’s so much fun I forget what I’m not. Then reality hits me like a splash of cold water, and I remember that I don’t belong. But I want to. Every moment, I’m desperate to earn my place – to prove that I’m good enough.


Prompto: And there were times when I felt, well, worthless.

Noctis: You’ve always been too self conscious.

Prompto: Heh heh heh.

Noctis: Let me guess: you’re hung up….about being the weak, useless nobody…so you try to make us feel better to make up for how you feel about yourself, right? Well, I’m impressed. Constantly watching out for your friends like that, it takes something special. And that something special defines who you are.

love letters ❥ peter parker

summary : peter, hopeless romantic that he is, has a cache of love letters, all addressed to you, hidden under his bed and expertly crafted. he never anticipated them being read, or the feelings he has for you being returned.

word count : 3.1k (holy fucking hell i’m sorry)

   Peter couldn’t help it, the way that he was. He was a romantic at a heart, though the awkwardness of him had a tendency to prevail rather than the confident, smooth talking, small part of him that had a desperate desire to reveal itself. Spider-man was as suave as a fifteen year old boy could be; Peter Parker was awkward, inept at participating in normal, human conversation and often incapable of forming coherent sentences more often than not. He wasn’t the best at talking to people besides Ned and Aunt May and- on occasion- Tony Stark. Especially not you. If there was one person that he turned into an absolute bumbling, ridiculous mess around, it was you. He loathed himself for it, sure that you thought that he was weird, annoying, the same way that anyone who didn’t know him assumed he was. 

   Ned, however, continuously insisted that you found Peter to be a sweetheart, like anyone who got to know him well enough did, and that you liked him very much- perhaps more than a friend, though Peter had immediately scoffed at the notion. It was out of the question, downright ludicrous. But, of course, Ned had implanted the idea in Peter’s head, and now the boy’s ever creative mind refused to stop constructing various scenarios in which you were Peter’s girlfriend and he was as happy as he had ever been. 

    While he had been a perfectly charming boyfriend in each and every one of those little dream sequences of his, he was hopelessly lost for words whenever you approached him, unable to even ask what class you had next, let alone reveal the pure adoration he had been holding on to ever since you had been placed beside him in Bio in your freshman year. You had always been the one to stick up for him and smile at him and treat him like a decent human being, and so of course he fell for you, and now he could barely look you in the eye without his cheeks turning a lovely shade of pink. So, he bottled his feelings and let them out in a way he had never known could help him.

    He wrote. 

    He wrote to you every single day and poured his heart out in every single letter and expressed every thought he knew, in his heart, he would never be able to say out loud. Writing what he felt was so much simpler than saying the words out loud. That was what he assumed, anyhow. He took his pen and placed it down on the paper, starting it the same way he always did. 

   Dear Y/N… As always, the words spilled over from his mind to the paper as if he wasn’t thinking, just writing and writing and writing until he had filled two pages without lifting his curly head from the paper once. When he finally finished, a yawn stretching across his mouth, he noticed Aunt May standing outside his door. He turned his chair around, raising his eyebrows at her. 

   “Writing to that pretty girl again?” She asked, hand on her hip but wearing a knowing, soft grin. Peter, not bothering to feign shock, nodded solemnly and placed his pen down the paper. “You should think about maybe, oh I don’t know, actually giving her one of the letters you’ve written?” 

    Adamantly, Peter shook his head. “May, I could never. You don’t get it.” He swiveled around in the chair, spinning it until he was dizzy. “These letters are embarrassing. They’re practically my whole heart and soul on a piece of paper. She’d scream and run away if she read how I felt about her.” He sighed, placing his elbow on the edge of the desk and resting his cheek in his hand. He stared up at his aunt, still craving her sage advice. May stared back at him thoughtfully. 

   “Well, in my personal experience,” she came over and gave Peter’s shoulder a squeeze, eyeing the letter that was signed with Peter’s name, “girls are suckers for love letters. And you Parker men write the best ones out there. Trust me.” 

   Peter bit his lip. “Yeah, sure, I’m not an awful writer. But, I still can’t give them to her. I just can’t.” Before she could say anything else, he was folding it up and placing it on top of the shelf on his desk next to his books for English. “Uncle Ben was different. He was charming. You know that.” 

    May smiled wistfully. “I do.” 

    “And that’s one thing that I didn’t get from him,” Peter finished, shrugging his shoulders as he stood up from his swivel chair. “It’s fine.” He waved it off. “I’m happy suffering in silence. I’m gonna go to bed. Big English project starts tomorrow. Love you,” he kissed May on the cheek as she left his bedroom, switching the light off in her departure. He stared at the wall once he was situated in bed, mulling the conversation over in his head. Maybe May’s right. Maybe telling Y/N wouldn’t be as bad as I’m thinking. Maybe I’m overreacting. Actually, never mind. She probably hates me. Ugh. Life sucks. 


    That morning, when he arrived in his English class, you were sitting in the seat that had been previously occupied by Ned pretty much every class since the beginning of the school year. Sucking in a breath, Peter took his first step into the classroom. He knew he was a little late to today’s lesson, but he hadn’t realized he was a full fifteen minutes behind schedule. Ned was in the back with Michelle, giving Peter an encouraging thumbs up when he noticed his best friend finally arrive on the scene. Peter gave him the finger. 

   “Mr. Parker, lovely for you to join us!” Ms. Matthews declared when he decided to shove himself through the door, his heart jackhammering away in his chest and making its way up to his throat. He kind of wanted to throw up. 

   “Um, yeah, well, you know, sleep and whatnot- overslept, haha,” he coughed out a laugh, scratching the back of his neck. The teacher nodded with faux sympathy, though he could tell she didn’t care that much for his explanation. “I’ll just, um, sit. Down.” 

    “Next to Y/N, please,” She instructed, waving her hand in your direction. “Since you were late and unable to choose your own partner, surprising since usually Ned is so eager to work with you, Y/N offered to be your partner.” The teacher gave you a fond smile, as every teacher did. “She can explain the details of the assignment.” 

    Peter gave her a stiff nod before sliding into his chair, and you noticed how rigid he was as he turned toward you with a slight frown. He seemed extremely upset to be working with you, but you wouldn’t let that get in the way. You liked Peter. Really, truly liked him. He was a sweetie whenever he actually talked to and different than the rest of the guys at Midtown. He was genuine.  

    Giving him your full attention, you beamed at him. “Hey, Peter,” you said cheerfully. He gave you a small smile in return, wringing his hands under the desk. He couldn’t stop fidgeting. Your own smile dropped, which he noticed immediately and felt awful about. “Sorry you didn’t get paired up with Ned,” you continued, taking your books out of your shoulder bag. “I know you would’ve preferred it that way-” 

    “No!” He interrupted quickly, practically slamming his hands down on the desk so hard you jumped in your seat, eyes wide. “Sorry, sorry, I just, um,” he laughed a little, his cheeks burning, “I’m, um, happy to have you as a partner. Really, I am,” he added as an afterthought, just to make sure you knew. 

   Your shoulders relaxed as you looked at him. “You’re not just saying that, right? You seem awfully stiff,” you teased, poking his uncomfortably positioned arm as you quirked a brow. 

    “Do I?” He was practically sweating. 

     “I was just joking, Pete. It’s cute, anyway.” Peter’s eyes, a shade of brown that you had come to think of as warm as honey, went wide and he gaped at you, but you pretended not to notice. “So, for the assignment we have to write a short story based on one of the assigned reading books this year.” 

   She called me cute

   “Shit… I think I forgot all of mine,” you were mumbling, your head practically stuck in your bag. “Did your bring yours, Peter?” 

   Oh my god, she thinks I’m cute. She thinks I’m cute. I’m going to faint

   You snapped your fingers in front of his cherry red face, trying not to appear as amused as you felt. He blinked owlishly, an apologetic half smile, half grimace on his face. He was cute most of the time, but especially when he smiled, even if it was only a forced, awkward one. “Do you have your books, Peter?” You repeated kindly. 

    “Um, sorry, I’ll check,” he answered, embarrassed about his utterly obvious staring that had just occurred. He rummaged around in his backpack before realizing he had forgotten them, as well. He popped back up, curls in disarray as his head brushed against the fabric of his bag. “I forgot them, sorry,” he ran a hand through his hair, messing it up even more. It was kind of adorable.

   “You need to stop apologizing for everything, Pete,” you laughed. “It’s fine. We can get started after school. My place or yours?” You were already packing your things, and before he could think about what he was about to do, he said, “Mine.”   

    “Cool,” you grinned again, a grin that made him want to smile for the rest of his life. “Which one of is doing the writing? Or do you want to split it?” 

    “You’re a, um, fantastic writer,” he told you, having read your submissions to the school newspaper more times than he could count. “If you wanna take over, you can. I can edit and stuff.” 

    “Aw, I’m not that good,” you shook your head abashedly, looking down at your lap. “But thank you, Peter. I’m sure you’re great, too, though. Are you sure you don’t wanna write some of it?”

    “I’m not much of a writer.”


    So, you were in Peter Parker’s room. He was having his third heart attack of the day, and was incredibly grateful that he had managed to keep his wits about him for majority of the day. He had only tripped over his words five times, tripped literally twice, and dropped his Metro card once, but it was fine. You helped him back each time he fell with your usual grace, barely acknowledging his multiple social faux pas and only laughing once because he fell over a small dog- which even he would admit was pretty funny. 

   Still, his palms were sweaty around you and he didn’t know how he was going to survive working so close to you for the next week while the English assignment was occurring. He lead you into his apartment and you noticed that his hands were shaking slightly as he twisted the keys in the lock. You walked into the apartment, the first thing crossing your mind was how cozy and homelike it was. You liked it very much. 

   “It’s really cute in here,” you said, smiling around the room as Peter busied himself with a glass of water. He downed it quickly. “Where’s your aunt?” 

   “Work,” he replied, catching his breath after the gulping down of his water. “Here, let’s go to my room.” He placed his glass of water on the counter and motioned for you to follow him, opening the door to his room and wincing at the mess in there. “It’s a mess, sorry about that.”  

   You rolled your eyes at him playfully. “Didn’t I say stop apologizing?” You entered his room as if you had been there many times before, taking your shoes off and setting them by the door. You threw your bag on his bed and took a seat in his swivel chair, and he liked how natural it seemed for you to be in his room. He liked how comfortable you were, sitting there. Something about it made him happy. 

   “Yeah, my bad,” he shrugged. You tilted your head, pointing your finger at him while he raised his hands defensively. “It wasn’t technically an apology!” He took a step out of the room. He was finally being normal around you, he realized delightedly. He would still need more water, though. He could feel his mouth getting dry. “I’m gonna get more water. Want anything?” You shook your head, spinning around in the chair as he left. 

   Your eyes scanned over his desk, taking in every inch of Peter Parker’s life. He had bad books stacked everywhere, his desk was a mess, there were clothes thrown about the room. Star Wars posters, Avengers posters, notes scattered across the desk. You admired the artful messiness of it all. You leaned up to where his English books were, spotting the one you were most interested in and yanking it off the shelf. As you did, a folded piece of paper fluttered down off the shelf, just when Peter was walking back into the room. 

   “I thought you said you weren’t a writer, Pete,” you raised your eyebrows at him, holding the letter in your hand and waving it at him. 

   He almost threw up right there. “Um, I’m not, please give that back,” he reached for it, but you jumped out of the chair, raising the letter high in the air. “Y/N!” He whined, grabbing for it again. “C’mon, please,” he pleaded desperately, pouting at you with such intensity it almost made you want to give it to him. 

    “Can’t I just read a sentence, Peter?” You pushed out your bottom lip, batting your eyelashes at him. 

     He almost gave in. “No, Y/N. Seriously, give it back.” He sounded scared now, upset as well. You pursed your lips, handing it back to him. He was so anxious about you reading it that it dropped on the floor, opening far enough so that you could see your name scrawled across the top in Peter’s defining chicken scratch handwriting. 

    “That says my name, so now I have to read it.” You stood directly in front of Peter, hands pressed together in a pleading motion, the expression on your face so genuinely interested that he had to give it to you. He picked it back up with a lump in his throat and handed it over, scared as ever. But this was what May had advised. Maybe she’d be right. 

    “Dear Y/N,” you read aloud in a loud, terrible accent, glancing back up at Peter as you read the line after that. He was staring down at the floor, preparing himself for what you were going to say when you read the letter, read his heart. You sat in his chair, realizing it’d be better if you didn’t read it so publicly. He sat down on his bed, waiting. 

   Dear Y/N. This is maybe the tenth letter I’ve written to you, and each time I say the same thing, so if one day you are reading this in proper succession, I’m sorry for being so utterly repetitive. You’ll probably never read this, though. And that’s why it’s so easy for me to write. I think you’re the only person to ever truly be interested in me when I’m talking about science. Not even Ned has an attention span that long. But you do. And you don’t know how much I want to thank you for that. You make it really difficult to not like you, to not be in love with you. I think that’s what it is… love. And if I’m not in love with you yet, then I’m certainly falling for you. Who wouldn’t? You’re a wonderful person without trying, you’re a beautiful hurricane, a sunset on the horizon of my bleakest hours, and you make me feel as if I’ve been standing in the sunshine for my entire life. 

   You put the letter down, smoothing it over your lap. You didn’t need to read the rest. That was enough. Peter gazed at you now, the way you’ve yearned to be looked at before, and you shamed yourself for being so blind these past two years. He wasn’t simply just staring. He was looking. Admiring. You slid next to Peter, placing the letter behind you. He moved his hand, curling his fingers around yours tentative as ever. Your free hand grazed up the side of his face, toying with the hair on the back of his neck before resting on his cheek. He shut his eyes. When he opened them again, you were so close that he was able to count each individual eyelash that you had, every single fleck of pure beauty in your deep eyes. 

   “I like you very much, Peter Parker,” you murmured. He felt his heart soar, and then, he felt himself kiss you. It was an out of body experience. He was there, he was the one kissing you, the one who had initiated it, but it felt like he wasn’t. He was up in the clouds, too far lost in the way it felt to run his hands through your hair as he had always dreamed of to notice Aunt May sneaking past the door, overjoyed to see Peter finally with the girl he had been loving in silence for far too long. You pulled away from each other, eyes opening slowly and hesitantly and your lips practically still connected. 

   He wanted to tell her that he adored her, but Aunt May’s voice flowed from the kitchen too loud to overpower his thoughts. “You read her the letter, didn’t you? I told you it’d work! Worked for your Uncle Ben and I was right as I always am!”

   He jumped up from the bed, sticking his head out of the doorway and pressing his finger to his lips. “Maaaayyyy, you’re embarrassing me,” he whispered-yelled, practically whined. “You were right, okay? Thank you, let me go get a girlfriend now. The girlfriend.” She beamed at him, but no one’s smile could shine brighter than Peter’s. 

    He retreated back into the room, and you were clutching the letter in your hands. You looked up at him hopefully. “I was thinking that maybe you could read me the other nine letters. If you’re up for it.” 

    Peter couldn’t possibly say no, taking a page out of his Uncle Ben’s book the way he should have done in the first place as he found the hiding spot for the stack of letters he had been writing for the past few months, sliding them over to you and feeling confident for the first time in a long time.