and this amused me

anonymous asked:

"can I kiss you?" with Juggie? pretty pleeease

[sorry this is super super short but I could have wrote tonnes and I didn’t want it to get out of hand]

You slid yourself into the booth next to the quiet and angsty looking teen.

‘Can I kiss you?’ You asked quietly with charming smile, hoping the the boy sat three booths down couldn’t hear you.

‘Excuse me?’ Came the dry and amused reply.

‘Okay, don’t look-’ you spoke through gritted teeth, 'but a guy who blew me off is sat a few booths down on another date. I figured out of all the people in here it’d annoy him the the most if I kissed you. I mean it doesn’t even have to be on the lips, just a peck on the cheek.’

'Is he gonna come and punch me if you do?’ He eyed you conspicuously.

'No- he’s all bark and no bite, couldn’t harm a goddamn fly even if he tried.’

In a flirty facade you gently held onto his arm and glanced over at the douche sitting three booths down, his eyes which were watching your booth averted themselves as you looked over.

'Okay,’ the boy winked secretly at you and tapped his cheek, 'lay it on me.’

Luke x Mara // Miss Congeniality Modern AU

Special Agent Mara Jade works for the FBI. The agency learns of a bomb threat during the Miss United States Pageant in Coruscant City by a terrorist who calls himself “Thrawn. “ Mara’s partner and work nemesis, Luke Skywalker, is put in charge of the mission, during which tomboy Mara is to go undercover as one of the contestants. 

While at first, the other contestants hate her, she begins to befriend them, especially Miss California, Leia Organa and surprises everyone, including pageant MC, Han Solo, by winning 1st runner up, and in the processing, figuring out the threat and arresting “Thrawn” for his terrorist actions.

Soooo I was a little bored and I was looking at pictures ( not just dirty ones ) and I noticed that this one of my boobs looks like a heart…
It amused me so I thought I would share 😅😂🤣

EXO (OT12) - Reaction to You Being A Foreigner Who Knows Their Native Language

When he was telling Jongdae what a beautiful woman you were when you were sitting a table away from them at a café he did not expect you to come up to him later with your number saying “You aren’t so bad yourself, handsome.” The shocked expression on his face amused you even more, “You mean you understood me?” You giggled, “Obviously, I learned the language before coming to live in a foreign country. Call me sometime, yeah?” You gave a wink and left him standing there speechless.

Luhan:                                                                                                                Luhan was walking around China when he decided to stop at a local street vendor for some food. When he was ordering, some girls recognized him and starting freaking out. “Can I just eat in peace for once.” You were standing behind him in line and said, “So you are why those girls are going crazy?” He turned expecting to see another native but instead noticed you were a foreigner. “Yeah,” He gave a sly smile, “I’m kind of famous.” You gave a look of amusement. “Anyways, why are you so damn good at Chinese?” You giggled, “I’m kind of a good study.”

Kris (Yifan):
While enjoying the nightlife that comes with living in California, Kris found himself in one of the many nightclubs. He received a phone call about a movie role in China and of course proceeded to speak in Mandarin. You being a bystander ended up hearing the conversation. “You are an actor?” You asked fluently in the language he just spoke. “Yeah I am,” he smiled then gave a confused look, “You speak Mandarin?” You smiled and started walking away, “Maybe we can speak more after dancing.” Kris gave a sly smile and followed you to the dance floor.

Waiting around at an airport can be quite annoying, it is even more annoying when your flight doesn’t leave when it is supposed to. A message rang out over the loudspeaker and you heard one of the men in the group of guys waiting for the same flight of you ask, “What did that just say?” in Korean. You responded out loud without thinking, “That the flight will be delayed until the storm stops.” He turned to you in response with a smile, “You speak Korean?” “Yeah,” you laughed, “I actually lived there for a few years when I was younger. Sorry to budge into your conversation.” He gave you a gracious smile, “No harm done, my name is Junmyeon. Care to talk a bit while we wait?”

Yixing looked up at the rollercoaster his friends were in line for and started mumbling how crazy they were to himself. “Not a fan of roller coasters either?” You asked casually in Chinese as you were waiting by the gates for your friends too. “More so of getting hurt,” he responded as he turned to face you. He had a confused look on his face to see that you were in fact not Chinese. “I did some studying abroad if that is what you were wondering,” you said with a smile. He nodded and gave a little laugh. “I am Zhang Yixing,” he said with one of his signature bows he did out of habit. “Y/N,” you said in response with a little bow of your own, “Ready to watch this horrifying sight together?” He smiled and you both turned back to watch the enormous metal contraption run its course.

Baekhyun and Chanyeol were walking around taking in the sights that New York City had to offer when they decided to make a bet and see if they could get a girl to say they were cuter than the other. Not expecting you to know their native language Baekhyun came up to you and gave a simple “Hello” in English. As you heard Chanyeol calling out words of encouragement in Korean you decided to respond with “Annyeong.” When he realized that you could speak in his own language he gave a giggle and a finger wave. “Do you mind playing along in helping me win a bet?” You smiled, “If I get your name first.” He gladly offered his name as you took his outreached hand and walked over to fool his friend.

When your uncle asked if you could bartend for the night at his restaurant you were hardly enthused by the thought of creepy men flirting with you over the counter. However, when an attractive bunch of foreigners walked in things seemed to be looking up for you. You heard them chatting in Korean so you decided you use your multilingual skills to ask them what they wanted to order. One of the guys, who you noticed to be very muscular under his shirt, was automatically overjoyed and didn’t seem to care about ordering at the moment. “What else do you know?”

Chanyeol and the boys were at a party in Busan when he noticed you across the room. He assumed that you wouldn’t know enough Korean to hold a conversation so he ended up just staying where he was. However, when you walked over and started talking to him he couldn’t hide the smile that formed on his face. “You really know Korean!” he said after you two had been talking for a while. “How else would I be able to talk to such a handsome man,” you joked and he laughed.

When they said there would be a new make-up artist he was surprised to see that you were a foreigner. As the boys introduced themselves one by one his shy smile broadened when you began a conversation with him. “Your Korean is really good,” he said reassuringly. “I try,” you said as you both laughed, “I could still use a little bit of teaching.” He perked up at the thought, “I could help you when I have free time.”

Tao was browsing the men’s ware at a popular clothing store when you heard him asking his friend something about the color he should get in Chinese. “I would go with the red one,” you said, “it will make a statement.” Tao turned to you and the fashionista within him responded, “that is what I was thinking too.” Your skin tone was a dead giveaway that Chinese was not your native language. “Where did a pretty girl like you learn Chinese?”

When out in Seoul for the night walking his dogs he did not expect to talk to a foreigner. “They are so cute! May I pet them?” You said in fluent Korean. Taken aback it took him a moment before he smiled and said “Yeah, of course.” He grinned as he watched you interact with his kids. When you stood back up he offered for you to walk with him. “You can walk one if you’d like, I’d enjoy the company.” He was very interested in getting to know you.

Even when on tour this boy needs his bubble tea fix. When you offered to help him order after seeing that he was struggling a bit, he was surprised. After you ordered for yourself he ended up paying for your drink. “You really didn’t have to,” you said shyly. “It’s no big deal, besides I want to know how you speak Korean so well.” You sat with him and ended up joking around and talking for a while.

I tried to make each situation different. I hope you guys like it. :)

anonymous asked:

I don't care what everyone else says, I will always be 100% convinced that Sherlock wanted a flatmate because he didn't want to pay the bedroom tax, he hates the government and refuses to contribute if he can avoid it

ASDFASDFASDF I’m not sure if you’re pulling my leg or being serious, Nonny, but this ask amused me and I am therefore posting it anyway. 

(PS. Is there seriously such a thing as “bedroom tax”??? Or is that the same as rental tax?)

I had an amusing dream last night.

Sara came up to Jaal, hid her face in his chest and made a very loud (yet muffed by his body) scream. Then stepped back, relieved.
Jaal (shocked): … what was that? Dearest, are you all right?
Sara: Sure, just had to deal with an owerwhelming feeling of loving you more than anything in this world for a moment.

colorfuloblivion  asked:

I just wanted to say that every time I see an update of new texts on your blog, I get really excited because they never fail to amuse me! Also I saw your 10 Facts tag and can totally understand the birthday fact because I too am a 13th child. I turned 13 on Friday the 13th several years ago....

Omg everyone is so adorable whoah- Hello!! Oh my gosh 13th is horrible tbh, I was supposed to be born on the 4th of May and honestly that would have been WAYYYY better like, I would have been a Star Wars baby (aka May The 4th Be With You) 

And thank you so much! Honestly everyone has my heart swollen today, you’re all so cute what the… People actually have notifications on for this blog… wow..

Headcanon: Lance is the loud one, constantly bragging to everyone who will listen about how cool and hot and perfect his boyfriend is

But Keith is the one who gives zero shits about PDA. He casually slips his fingers between Lance’s at breakfast. He rests a hand at the small of his boyfriend’s back during their morning meetings. At the end of dangerous missions, he grabs Lance by the collar and sticks his tongue down his throat. He frequently helps himself to a handful of ass whenever he walks by