and they lined up

(13) Ignis’ pick-up lines.

Ignis: Hm. Is that a hardcover or are you just happy to see me?
Gladio: It’s a hardcover and it’s precious, omg, look at it, I just bought this new book and-
Gladio: Oh. 

*raises an eyebrow*

I mean…. just might be me but…….How do you go from half moon shape eyebrows on April 19th with Lopez… to triangles April 22?? I mean do dudes really have that kind of eyebrow growth?

I mean i realize with all the Lakota and Cheyenne blood I have, that means i do not have a bunch of body hair. And when they shape my brows, mine stay shaped for about 5 months. (Cause trust that shit sucks when they make a mistake. It means half a year before it grows back at least) So I mean I could shave my legs today and maybe have some fuzz by Dec. So I am legitimately asking here. (The German blood isn’t enough to beat the others Lol)

But you know… inquiring minds just wanna know.


The firm dealt in every conceivable commodity required by planters: timber, bread, flour, rice, lard, pork, beef, fish, black-eyed peas, corn, porter, cider, pine, oak, hoops, shingles, iron, lime, rope, lampblack, bricks, mules, and cattle.
—  Page 29, Chapter Two: “Hurricane"
Alexander Hamilton by Ron Chernow

The Wedding 

dedicated to freak-is-the-new-princess
The neural network generated pickup lines that are actually kind of adorable

So it occurred to me that the same neural network framework I’ve trained on recipes, Pokemon, superhero names, and Irish tune names might be able to write pick up lines as well.

Gathering the dataset was much more painful than I had expected - I hadn’t really read many of these before, and most were obscene, or aggressive, or kind of insulting. I began to regret the whole project.

But although the neural network figured out the basic forms “You must be a … because….” or “Hey baby, wanna…” it never learned to generate the worst lines - most of these were based on wordplay that it didn’t have a chance of reproducing. 

Instead, it began to generate lines that varied from incomprehensible to surreal to kind of adorable:

Are you a 4loce? Because you’re so hot!
I want to get my heart with you.
You are so beautiful that you know what I mean.
I have a cenver? Because I just stowe must your worms.
Hey baby, I’m swirked to gave ever to say it for drive. 
If I were to ask you out?
You must be a tringle? Cause you’re the only thing here.
I’m not on your wears, but I want to see your start.
You are so beautiful that you make me feel better to see you.
Hey baby, you’re to be a key? Because I can bear your toot?
I don’t know you.
I have to give you a book, because you’re the only thing in your eyes.
Are you a candle? Because you’re so hot of the looks with you.
I want to see you to my heart.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I have a price tighting.
I have a really falling for you.
Your beauty have a fine to me.
Are you a camera? Because I want to see the most beautiful than you.
I had a come to got your heart.
You’re so beautiful that you say a bat on me and baby.
You look like a thing and I love you.