“Where did the coffee table go ?”- Bruce Wayne x Reader
Just something short and stupid written in 5 minutes during my lunch break. Didn’t proof read (I never do, I never can re-read anything I wrote so like meh) so sorry about any awful mistakes. Sometimes, I have really shitty ideas haha, hope you’ll still kinda like it though ^^’ :
“The mysterious case of the disappearing furnitures by detective/Batman’s partner Richard John Grayson, 8 and a half years old :
Recently noticed that furnitures around Wayne Manor have gone missing.
_Suspects : Bruce Wayne, (Y/N) Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth or a stranger.
_Motive for Bruce Wayne : reminds him of his parents so he’s changing them ? But that wouldn’t explain why they’re changed on a regular basis.
_Motive for (Y/N) Wayne : …I don’t know yet, but will find one, she’s too nice to me and maybe it’s a trick so we DON’T suspect her ? Maybe she has a huge furniture dealing web out there in Gotham !
_Motive for Alfred Pennyworth : Less to clean.
_Motive for “stranger” : Those furnitures must be expensive, selling them might be good, but then why does Bruce not react ? Maybe it’s a mind trick that stranger is playing on Bruce, getting rid of every pieces of furniture his parents bought ?
All of the suspect have a motive, and a good one if I might say, and I will find what is happening to all those poor furnitures !
09/08/01, chest of drawers disappeared.
10/08/01, new chest of drawers arrived, Alfred rolled his eyes at it.
14/08/01, lawn table gone.
14/08/01, a bit later, saw Alfred took down a few pieces of Bruce and (Y/N)’s bed, the headboard I think.
18/08/01, started my interrogation : when I asked Bruce he became very pale and looked “horrified” (according to (Y/N) who entered, she said : “what’s that horrified face my heart ?”). I’m not sure what horrified means, but it doesn’t sound nice…maybe he feels guilty ? When I asked my questions about the broken and missing pieces of furniture to (Y/N), she just burst out laughing.
26/08/01, today, almost the entire living room was empty, I asked Alfred and he said he was remodeling…I think he doesn’t want to worries me about our furnitures being stolen.
da Bruc Dad Bruce sneaking out with the a plank that I believe is from the coffee table in the living room…very suspicious”.
Smiling, Dick stops reading the clumsy handwriting he had when he was eight and puts down his old “very important cases” notebook back on his deck, sighing, nostalgic.
Oh the good old days when he was the only “Batboy” (who was he kidding ? Dick knew that without little brothers his life would be boring. He makes a mental note though, to hide this forever from his brother’s sight, they would mock him too much for almost everything written in that thing).
“Where do all the furniture go ?” was his actual first case, and…oh ew, just thinking about what he discovered, a few years after he “opened the case”, where those furnitures went, was grossing him out.
But he still couldn’t help but smile at his younger self.
He was a rather cute kid wasn’t it ? His mom would agree.
“(Y/N) Wayne”, the woman who was “too nice, must be a trick”…Oh he was so wrong about that. You were nice because you were the best woman in the World. You were more than nice. You were…Oh man you were the best in everything ! Your hugs and soothing wordsgot him through so many difficult moments…
One of the only thing “bothering” him about you, was still kind of awesome.
It was so damn disgusting sometimes. But also overly adorable.
Your only “flaw” was to be too in love with Bruce, and vice versa.
You two could be so gross when together, forgetting the world around you, kissing and embracing and EWWW !
Sometimes, your sons had to make sure you both knew they were here by making loud noises, and even then, more often than not, they’d be the one leaving the room rather than you two stopping being so goddamn in love.