hi!! i havent got on here for a while cause i got sick; wrist injuries + flu and i went to a trip.. but i’m back now!! hopefully to catch up w/ work backlog and art trades nice and easy ToT it’s taking a while to get back to drawing but i’m getting here! i had a very good weekend nevertheless. i recently bought an aki mini fig! he’s currently at my friend’s place because i’m gonna move anytime soon.. it’ll probably take a couple more months but im so happy and excited to get him!!! i’ve wanted him for soooo long TTvTT
I saw a tag on a post with fan art of harry potter as he gets older that said: “I don’t like to think about Harry getting older” and was unsurprised to find the person identifies themselves as a teen in their tumblr bio.
It caused such an odd and jarring response in me though. A “what?” and a “why not?” and a “how could you not want to consider that?”
Every year I get older and the world spins by faster. I am old (ancient) by tumblr standard, 31 (i’ll turn 32 in 2017). I have lived through transition (11 years and counting). I have lived through heartbreak (did I ever tell you all about the time a girl i owned a house with broke up with me the same summer I was ring hunting to propose to her?) through whatever long roads you walk when you reach 30 and realize there is likely no match to the parts of you that are not quite aligned with what the world sees as normal for gender or sexuality. that your inability to ever fit in boxes has doomed you to a certain kind of loneliness.
I know the books write him otherwise, happy with children and ginny, but there is some part of me that wonders if the trauma harry lived through never quite lets go of him. never quite sets him free. Ginny wakes many a night to find him staring into the dark, seeing things she can’t help to ease. She moves close anyway, head on the back of his shoulder, hand on hip. She has learned over the years the best thing she can do is be there. Be present. Be real. Be now. And eventually his breathing slows and he turns into her and she holds him until he sleeps again. Until his eyes don’t stare into the dark again. She has always been more of a hero than he could ever hope to be. They both know that.
Some nights it’s her instead. She shivers, and he tucks his head against her shoulder, arm around her waist. And together they wait it out. The trauma. The truth of being survivors of a war.
They raise their children with as much quiet grace as they know how. Fumbling and awkward and mildly haunted. Their children will never quite understand, they pray that their children will never really understand.
I think a lot about childhood heroes….aging. Because I am aging. Because life is short. Because I want to know that later. That tomorrow. That years from now. Whatever glory my youth proclaimed there will be quiet. And trust. And love. And peace. For all of us. Survivors.
What would be some of the little things Matt, Mello, L, and Near secretly like about their s/o? Little habits or things they'd like them to do? Thank you!
L: L would find it really cute if his s/o started doing the little quirks he has, like picking things up and holding them with their thumb and pointer finger or putting their fingers in their mouth. He also finds it really cute when his s/o talks about him or boasts about the things he’s accomplished. It makes him feel loved.
Matt: Matt finds it adorable whenever his s/o wears his clothes. He also loves seeing his s/o smile; he finds the way the side of her mouth and the bridge of her nose wrinkles when she laughs. He also loves seeing her flustered and ambarrassed; it makes his day to know he made her pretty little face go all pink.
Mello: Mello loves how his s/o knows what he’s thinking and what mood he’s in. He also finds it cute when his s/o leaves little hand written messages around the house for him to find. He’d become very aggravated normally if anyone tried taking any of his chocolate, but wouldn’t mind when she did it. He would always give her shit for it, but both him and her knew he didn’t mind.
Near: Because his head is so sensitive, he absolutely loves when his s/o plays with his hair and runs their fingers through it. He also finds the different ways she sits when reading really cute; the weirder the position, the more he liked it. He’d also love seeing his s/o get all excited about something they love and are passionate about, and he loves being able to make her blush.