and then they stuck some weird things in my mouth

Fake/Pretend Relationship Fics

(last update 29.April.17)


Famous Harry/Louis 

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One day I heard some guy tell this girl in my class that her gums stuck out too much when she smiled, so she started covering her mouth every time someone cracked a joke or laughed with her.

And I knew a boy in my English class who would always get excited over the tiniest of things, then say sorry afterwards. He’d actually apologize for being over-enthusiastic. This was probably because of the weird looks people would give him when he boasted about his favorite books or movies. He actually thought his passions were silly.

Another time, I was at my best friend’s house. We were trying on clothes, and I threw a crop top of mine for her to wear. She told me she couldn’t wear it because her belly would stick out, and she wouldn’t want people staring or making rude comments. It was only later I found out about the nights she’d spend with two fingers down her throat.

Then a distant friend of mine had this boyfriend who constantly criticized her. He never liked her hair up, so she always wore it to her shoulders. He didn’t like her in skirts or shorts, so she always dressed down. And when he thought her friends were too opinionated, she soon grew distant from me as well. When he eventually left, she had completely lost who she was.

And once upon a time I fell in love with a boy who was afraid to cry because his whole life he was told that it made him weak. So day by day he’d let his problems eat away at him until eventually it consumed everything he was.

What I’m trying to say is, be careful of your words. These might be small instances, but the biggest issues are usually hidden beneath a million smaller ones. Everyone is struggling in little ways. Be kind.

—  // Excerpt #87



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Baby Gangsters (BTS, You) Scenario

So I got this crazy idea a couple of months ago and I only had time to write it now since I was so busy with thesis and work. I wanted to finish it this week to celebrate Bangtan’s success~ :)

CONGRATS TO OUR BOYS! And I hope you guys enjoy this little scenario. <3

(Your POV)

Some days were normal. Too normal that’s it’s almost boring… routine-like even.

Others? Other days were just plain weird you have to take a pause to reevaluate your life.

I wasn’t sure which is which the moment I opened the door, feeling my heart get stuck in my throat at the sight that welcomed me. The paper bag fell from my grip, dropping to the ground with a loud bang; with the promise of some crushed goods I worked so hard to shop for that morning.

My mouth hung open as wide as my eyes, unable to move from my current shocked state as seven guys–boys–stood there in a straight line staring up at me with wide innocent eyes.

The thing was… I knew each and everyone of  them but–

“What the–”

Noona~” Taehyung cooed, his eyes wide and slightly teary.

Noona~!” everyone chimed while Jungkook sat on the floor, looking equally terrified and surprised by my presence and to my terror…. started crying.

What in the world, I thought as Bangtan babies stared up at me.


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redventure  asked:

I read the stuff you wrote about Calliope and a scenario ran through my head where Hijinks is stranded at sea after a mission goes awry and ends up saved by Calliope and the first thing he does when he gets home is tell Brainstorm about the mystic sea lady who saved his sorry ass and stuck a fish in his mouth. Fast forward a few scenes to Brainstorm on a beach encountering Calliope, and while looking her dead in the eye, he flatly states, like some weird greeting, "I have a seafood allergy"

Calliope: c: -sticks a bundle of kelp in his mouth-

Mother Novak, bent over the edge of the bed in her slip. Her spine claws through the purple silk like the ribs of mountains, austere and lonely. You wonder how many people died trying to cross the plains of her back, how many prisoners she made from her grim heart. Your mother, with her glass eyes and spider fingers, a string of white pearls wrapped round her wrist like a rosary, praying into the cold silence of her bedroom. In the mornings, her room smells of dust and decay, like the insides of a pink lung.

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seventeen & midnight snacks

s.coups: mm probably a sandwich of like ANY KIND like ??pb&j sandwich?ok ! ham & cheese sandwich?Yep! and hes so shameless about it too like he’ll eat ANYTHING between two slices of bread

jeonghan: nutella on some HONEY WHEAT toast (it has to be honey wheat). he only has one slices w a tiny glass of some milk how cute

jisoo: smthn weird honestly he probably makes a croissant at 1am

junhui: strawberries&cream !!! he plays with the whip cream thing too much tho and ends up getting a LOT in his mouth and is REALLY scared bc his head is kinda stuck at this 90degree angle and he doesnt know how to eat the cream and just starts screaming

hoshi: HES THE WORST he makes a PROTEIN SMOOTHIE at MIDNIGHT with this old af blender thats so noisy and everyones like “…….oh my god……….”

wonwoo: cereal just .cereal. sometimes he mixes it up and eats som rice krispies with strawberry jam or puts some banana slices in his honey nut cheerios but its rlly cute because he gets this big bowl and just munches down the cereal with this tiny spoon vv cute

jihoon: snack??more like meal. this boy eats anything at midnight bc hes always up so late like ?hed call for pizza or mcdonalds and just sit on the floor with only his phone flashlight as a light source until someone (most of the time minghao) walks in like “???hyung u ok u need some ..time?” and jihoon just gives him some fries and tells him to go to sleep

dk: for some reason he really likes dried fruit ?? no one knows why but like u can just find him with his phone light tryin to look for some of his dried mangos to munch on omg

mingyu: snotboy is really weird whatd u expect . he gets peanut butter and some cheerios and kinda mixes it together & eats that??? wtf actually

minghao: anything sweet omg but mostly little rice cakes or smthn ! he has some that seungkwan’s mom made for everyone and he loves them so much but hes too shy to ask for more :(

seungkwan: HE GOES ALL OR NOTHING so he either has like. a slice of a pear with a mint leaf and a shot glass with almond milk….or goes and cooks this huge af meal with a side course and everything and eats it while writing a letter to his mom for more rice cakes

hansol: COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES oh my god like choco chip cookies but especially oreos & lemon flavored cookies !!!!! then heats up a lil milk and oh my god this kid is adorable

chan: sadly someone (scoups) thought it was a “fun and joking” idea (scoups) to literally make dino think (scoups) that he was drinking alcohol (scoups). choi seungcheol took this kid one time and sat down, poured him this mysterious looking liquid and said “hey..have one with me its ok im your dad now” and little did chan know that he was LITERALLY DRINKING coke&milk mixed together…..scoups has a pitcher of it and chan always takes it and pours it in a wine glass and is like “sigh….todays been a long day…” and drinks the coke and milk i hate scoups