and then they all ate pie

so i saw this quote in some angsty gif set earlier

“this is great

 just the three of us. 

You, me… 

and this brick wall that you built between us.”

and when i read it i thought that was the deepest shit ever. i related to this quote so much. how many times did i feel like this when a relationship ended? how many times have i seen a wall built between two people who were once close? experienced the wrenching pain of separation after times of being so close? I was completely moved by it. it was something straight out of charles dickens. i’m completely floored. then i realized. its spongebob. its from a fucking spongebob episode. when he ate the pie bomb and was supposed to explode at sunset.and squidward built an actual fucking brick wall to protect himself from the explosion. i hate this website. i am. deleting. we all deserve to. burn

Cutthroat Kitchen -- A Summary
  • Alton Brown: *auctions off lemon meringue pie*
  • Chef 1: *buys pie for $160 trillion dollars and gives it to Chef B* u look like u can handle this ;) ;) ;) ;)
  • Chef B: it OK i once ate a slice lemon meringue pie at my gran mama's when i was 8 yrs old so i kno exactly how to incorporate this into my chicken parmesean
  • Chef C: im super duper stoked i didnt get given this auction bc im already handcuffed naked to an elvis impersonator inside a fish tank n i have to do all my cooking on this antique shotgun from altons basement that he used to shoot cats when he was in middle school :)

Asami’s real nice and all but I can totally see her gloating in front of Mako when Korra’s not looking like doing the eating out gesture and immediately playing innocent when Korra looks back

headcanons for larissa duan
  • sometimes she misses her long hair. usually when she’s combing through it after a shower. (have you ever went from long hair to short hair? its awkward to brush after you get it cut)
  • she likes to listen to classical music sometimes
  • she has 3 pairs of bunny slippers
  • she loves flower crowns but she doesn’t like wearing them
  • she wants to paint the whole team together but she always worries it won’t be good enough
  • she thinks Chowder is ridiculous but she loves him and is actually very excited to be bathroom buddies
  • she straight up was about to murder Shitty when he accidentally ate all of the pie Bitty made her 
  • she’s drawn on at least 4 members of the team while they were passed out. her drawings ranged from beautiful masterpieces to crudely drawn dicks jizzing
  • one time she was dared to eat 2 big spoonful’s of sriracha and that was not a fun time. (she didn’t like that she couldn’t put like bread with it or something she hates just eating a condiment by itself)
  • sometimes she loves when the guys use her to bench press because its just a fun feeling but other times she’s plotting their demise. depends on the day.
  • when she’s on her period she spends as long as she can in the shower. being on her period is awful she hates how unclean she feels (poor Lardo sweats)
        • one time she had to text Chowder to get her more products but he panicked and bought like 1 of every tampon brand the store had in the size she needed. 
        • (Chowder looked ridiculous with a cart full of tampons and holding five sticks of butter)
        • Lardo thought it was kinda sweet and ended up using all the boxes that weren’t her brand in her next art piece.
  • sometimes she walks into Bitty’s room to flop on his bed and make dying noises. if he’s busy she does it to Chowder. it scares him.
  • she is the texting queen. She can text and not need to look at her phone while she does so and there’s no typos or anything.
  • sometimes she wants to finger paint like a little kid but she has to wear gloves. can’t fuck up her good nail polish, she’s almost out of it
  • she has one area on her wall that’s dedicated to her drawing on it. 
  • sometimes her favorite thing to do is just sit on her bed, close her eyes and breathe for a while.
  • she’s so in love with Shitty it hurts
  • she knows Shitty loves her and it hurts
  • she can see her and Shitty getting married and having a cute little house and Shitty being a stay-at-home-dad to their 3 dogs (and maybe some kids down the road??) while she goes out to work and paint 
  • God, she fuckin misses Shitty
  • she remembers the last time they got high together, at the end when it was wearing off Shitty had muttered quietly, “I want to marry you,” and her only response was silence. she remembers when Shitty tried to play it off, asked her if she thinks Jack would marry him, oh, or maybe Bitty? He could be his sugar daddy, Lards.
  • she remembers how she wanted nothing more than to turn around and kiss him senseless
  • she remembers how she hasn’t had a solid conversation with Shitty since he started at Harvard.

  • she remembers how he once came over to the Haus, bags under his eyes and climbed into her bed, slurring his words and yawning every three seconds. a little ziploc sandwich baggie clutched in his hands.



  • she remembers waking up that morning, no Shitty, no note, but a thin band circling her ring finger.
  • she remembers giggling as she sent a pic to the group chat, the old one, with no new frogs and Shitty and Jack in it. she also remembers the squeal she heard from the kitchen and the thundering feet of her teammates as they all fought their way up the stairs.
Great Minds Think Alike

Requested by Anonymous
Written at spnfanficskatoli

Author: Assbutt

Character: Dean

Reader gender: female

Warnings: SMUT, fluff, cussing, it’s kinda long but totally worth reading

“Dammit.” You whispered to yourself.

“What is it?” Dean came into the kitchen behind you as you closed the fridge.

“You ate all the pie!” You groaned.

“Um yeah. It’s pie.” Dean laughed.

“I like pie too!”

“Well I LOOOOOVE pie.” Dean stepped closer and stared down at you.

You stood with him chest to chest, glaring at him. “You should go buy some more.” You ordered.

“Make me.” Dean smirked.

“I’m just gonna threaten you.”

“There is nothing that you can hold over me, (y/n).” Dean laughed.

“I will put passwords on all your porn websites.” You folded your arms, waiting for a response.

He groaned and grabbed his keys, “What flavor?”

************

“Here’s your damn pie.” Dean put the plastic and foil container on the table in front of you.

“Dean, you ate more than half!” You laughed and punched his arm.

“What? I told you I love pie.”

Sam walked into the room, “You guys are a pair to draw to.”

“No way.” You laughed.

“Yeah, you guys could be twins in personality and likes and what not.” Sam shrugged.

You and Dean both rolled your eyes at him and scoffed.

“See!” Sam laughed.

“That’s proves nothing.” You shook your head and started eating your pie.

***********

“Well, shit.” You sighed, looking at your last shirt that you owned that could be worn in public.

You walked out into the main room of the bunker, “Shopping time boys, this is my last shirt. And if this one gets ruined, I have nothing to wear.”

“No complaints here.” Dean said, looking at you with a dorky smile.

“Oh my god. Okay, am I going alone or do you guys need anything?” You sighed.

“Yeah, I’m running low too. Sammy?” Dean looked to Sam.

“I’m good.” Sam’s eyes stayed glued to his book. “You two have fun.” He waved you guys off and you left.

The impala roared to life and it always gave you chills at how beautiful it sounded.

“Baby sounds good today.” Dean smiled and pulled out of the driveway, heading towards the closest shopping center.

**********

“We brought grub!” Dean called as the two of you walked down the stairs into the bunker.

“Let me guess, burgers?” Sam folded his arms.

“We got you a salad.” You sighed.

You and Dean spoke in unison, “Geez, Sammy.”

“You guys are exactly alike!” Sam repeated from the other day.

“Are not!” You and Dean denied at the same time. It just made Sam burst into laughter.

You set all your shopping bags on the table next to Dean’s and started pulling the food out.

“What did you guys buy?” Sam started picking through both your bags.

“Just what we needed.” Dean took a bite out of his burger.

“Oh my god!” Sam laughed. “You guys got matching plaid shirts!” He looked at the both of you with just this- look.

“SAM! So what?! Will you give it up already?! God.” You groaned.

“Sorry.” Sam hung his head a little.

You handed him his salad and the room was fairly silent for the rest of the night.

********

TWO HOURS LATER

“Another beer, guys?” You looked at the boys.

“Sure.” Dean said.

“Why not?” Sam added.

You grabbed more beers from the kitchen and brought them out.

“21 questions, anybody?” Dean shrugged and make the ‘not bad’ face.

“Sure.” You sat down at the table.

“You first, Sammy.” Dean said.

“Nah, I’m going to bed. You guys have fun.” Sam got up and started walking to his room.

“Yeah, you too!” Dean called.

“Shut up.” Sam groaned and you heard his door close a moment later.

“What was- OH.” You blushed and covered your face.

“I was just kidding around with him, (y/n). No need to get worked up.” Dean took another swig of his beer.

“Well, okay. So… 21 questions?” You asked.

“Yep. Okay, favorite food?”

“Pie. Duh.” You said.

“Alright.” He smiled and high fived you.

“Favorite… Activity?” You smiled.

“Sex. Duh.” He laughed.

“Alright.” You high fived him again.

“Favorite place to be?” You said, drawing little designs in the condensation on your beer.

“Uh, on the road with my Baby.” Dean nodded.

“It is peaceful out on the road. Just listening to her purr.” You shook a little with fake chills.

“Top or bottom?” He laughed.

“Well that escalated quickly! Haha, uh bottom?”

“I knew it!” Dean chuckled.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know. You just seem like a bottom kind of girl.” He looked up at the ceiling.

“And what about you Mr. Winchester?”

“I’m always on top, baby.” He smiled, starting to day dream. You knew that look, the hint of lust in his eyes. He started to blush.

“Pants getting tight there, Dean?” You chuckled.

He shook his head quickly, snapping out of it and gave you his best bitch face. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah okay.” You laughed. “Uh, rough or slow?” You asked with a devious look in your eye.

He looked at you, a little shocked. “What about you?”

“I asked you first.” You smiled and took a long sip from your beer.

“Let’s say it at the same time.” Dean said. “1… 2… 3.”

“Whatever she wants.” He said. “Whatever I deserve.” You spoke at the same time and looked at each other, eyes wide.

Dean laughed and smiled over at you with a new look in his eye. “You know…?”

You took a gulp of your drink, “What?”

“Maybe Sam’s right. We are a lot alike.” Dean looked down, avoiding eye contact now.

“Don’t get a chick flick moment started, Dean.” You pushed his shoulder lightly but he bounced right back. You were both leaning towards each other over the corner of the table. Your faces were mere inches from each other’s. “Let’s continue the game.” You said softly.

“Do you want to kiss me?” Dean whispered.

“Yes.” You whispered back.

He leaned in and pulled you close, pushing his lips against yours. You both went to stand and he sat you on the table, pushing himself between your legs. You wrapped your arms around his neck and he started to unbutton your shirt.

You pushed his jacket off his shoulders, helping him shrug it off. He finally got your shirt unbuttoned and threw it behind him. You tugged his shirt over his head and flung it away.

“How do you want it, baby?” He said, nipping at your jaw and down towards your neck.

“I think the question is, what do I deserve?” You breathed.

Dean pulled his face from your neck to look at you with fiery eyes. He growled at your words and unclasped your bra and pulled it off of you. He put a hand on each breast and started squeezing, making you throw your head back in pleasure. He pushed his tongue into your mouth and groaned as you started working on his pants. You got them undone and pushed them down with his boxers. He leaned you back so that you laid on the table, legs dangling off at the knee. He wasted no time pulling your jeans off of your legs with your soaked panties. You sat back up so that you could keep kissing him. Both of his arms slipped around your waist as he lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his hips. You sunk down onto him and you both moaned once he was seated in your hilt. He held you by the ass and started thrusting you up and down on him. Your chests rubbed together, making your nipples go hard. He fell back into a chair which made the thrusting easier.

His head was level with your chest and he took a nipple into his mouth while one hand stayed on your ass and the other went up to tangle in your hair.

“Dean… Oh- oh God. Fuck!” You dug your nails into his shoulders, trying to ground yourself.

“I- I can’t- I’m so close.” Dean moaned into your chest.

“Let go, baby.” You breathed and he spilled his hot seed into you.

His warmth filled your core and you came seconds later. As you rode out your orgasms, both your cum and his dripped down your thighs and onto Dean’s crotch. You pulled off of him and got down on your knees between his legs, lapping at the mess on his hips.

“Babe.” Dean moaned.

You kissed the tip of his dick and then ran your tongue along the bottom, from the base to the head. You pulled him into your mouth as he started getting hard again. He twisted his fingers in your hair and leaned his head back, letting out little whimpers. His hips bucked up and he started thrusting into your mouth. With almost every push, he touched the back of your throat, and that made him get loud again.

“(Y/n)… (Y/n)… Yes baby. Fuck, just like that.” He groaned.

You reached down to play with your clit and moaned around his cock, the vibrations sent him over the edge again. You swallowed around him, and let him out with a pop.

You both stood and ran off to his room. Once inside he laid you back on the bed. He knelt between your legs and pushed your knees apart. One hand went to massage a breast and the other had two fingers pumping in and out of you. Dean leaned in and pushed his tongue into you while scissoring you with his fingers. His movements were building you up fast and you screamed his name, cumming for the second time that night. Dean pulled his finger out of you and licked them clean.

He helped you crawl up to the head of the bed and he got into bed with you. His muscular arms wrapped around you and pulled you into his chest.

“That was so hot.” Dean smiled and kissed the top of your head.

“Fuck yeah it was.” You said, still trying to catch your breath. “Thank you, Dean. Ha, I’ve been wanting to do that for awhile…”

“No problem, baby girl.” Dean pecked your lips. “You deserved it.”

Trading Places (Sub!Sam adventures!)

Requested by two anons: a sub!Sam smut fic. Enjoy, everyone! XOXO

Summary: Sam is usually the agressive one, but decides he wants the reader to take over for a night.

Word Count: 2140

Warnings: Smut, light bdsm

Staring at Sam across the dinner table as he ate was enough to get you all hot and bothered. The way he wrapped his mouth around the bottle of beer he drank from, the way he licked his lips between bites…his mouth was damn distracting. Then there was dessert, when Sam dipped his finger into the whipped cream that topped the pie and gently sucked it off, staring straight into your eyes while his tongue peeked out, teasing you.

You began thinking all kinds of dirty thoughts, and by the time it was late enough to go to bed, you were so turned on you could barely see straight. 

Keep reading

10

I had thanksgiving leftovers all to myself I was full and sleepy so I took a hot shower but I also felt like taking pictures but this isn’t mine but I just thought I’ll do it just this once so I ate a piece of pumpkin pie even though it sucks but (wait I lied I had two pieces) anyway after that I did a water bloat and called it a night it was fun and I felt (sexy)SSSH!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂
Holy shit 602 follows lol that’s badass
I love you guys😘😘😘

"Imagine Castiel blushing as he gives you a teddy bear, saying that he researched it to be a popular gift." One Shot

This is a part of the re-upload series; From the early days of this blog. These are not in the current format. All new submissions must be in the current format to be posted. 

It started on your birthday. You can only assume that Cas overhead the boys talking about it while you were away, because you sure didn’t tell him that your birthday was coming up. In fact, you hadn’t mentioned it to anyone for quite some time; it seemed something of a miracle that they remembered it at all.

Keep reading

4

Imagine: Pranking the Winchesters with Gabriel…

Prank #1: A foamy wake-up call

Sam and Dean had fallen asleep on the couch - a very bad idea when two tricksters where in the house: You, their mischievous younger sibling, and Gabe, who was basically a five year old in a man’s body.

You drew moustaches and doodles on the brother's faces with markers, squirting shaving foam into their hands and tied their shoe laces together.

You both tickled their noses with feathers, watching as they splatted the foam on their faces.

“(Y/N)! Gabriel!” They yelled in unison, trying to chase after you and falling on their faces. You and Gabe high-fived, laughing as you ran away to hide before the boys recovered.

Prank #2: Disgusting Doughnuts

Dean always ate all the doughnuts and pie before you - so you decided it was time for action…

You and Gabe took the custard and jelly out of the doughnuts with syringes, replacing the sweet contents with mustard, horse radish, ketchup and red hot chilli sauce, dusting them with talcum powder.

Dean picked up a chilli one, taking a big bite out of it - before screaming like a girl and running into the kitchen, whining and swearing as he went. Sam burst out laughing, giving you and Gabe high fives - then picked up a horse radish doughnut…poor moose…

Prank #3:  Wild Goose Chase

Now, this prank was a hard one.

Gabe hid the impala - with help from Bobby - and left a fake ransom note on the kirb, giving a random location of where to find the car. The boys fell for it, going to the location, only to find another note - and so on and so on.

You and Gabe brought the car back to the bunker, parking it outside. You sat on the hood, soaking in the sun as you heard, Dean, screaming death threats from the bottom of the hill, taking that as your cue to leave…

2

Hey Ya’ll! It’s finally fall and you know what that means? Sweaters, cool weather, warm comfort meals and HOCKEY. So in honor of everyone’s favorite Russian, gold chain wearing, buddy of Zimmboni, protector of Snowy, all around kick ass D-Man Falconor… I bring you my latest Check, Please! recipe. A savory potato pie or Mashed-Pie-Tater!

This recipe is crazy easy and tasty af. My GF and I ate half of it for dinner and I keep eyeing my third helping.

So here it is, the easiest pie you’ll ever fall in love with!


Recipe by me Ittybittybakes/ @dandeebaker based on the character Alexei (Tater) Mashkov from the best thing that has ever happened to comics  @omgcheckplease by @ngoziu

Keep reading

reasons malec should be your otp:

- alec doesn’t want the world, he wants magnus

- alec is so much more than just magnus’ first shadowhunter

- when they kissed the first time alec realized that that is how love is supposed to feel like

- alec and magnus reading while sitting on the couch in a tangle of limbs and chairman meow on top of them

- magnus staying up all night to heal alec after especially hard hunts

- alec trailing kisses all over magnus’ body and whispering “aku cinta kamu” as he goes and magnus chuckling and moaning beneath him

- watching the stars on the balcony of the loft and soft kisses under the moonlight

- alec didn’t know how to make pie until one day magnus said he was craving it and after a couple of hours the kitchen turned into a hurricane of flour and eggs and kitchen utensils and he burned the pie but they ate it anyway

-them adopting a kid from the shelter and magnus and alec cry the entire time because they are going to be the fathers they should have had



- why do you even need reasons it’s magnus and alec honestly

anonymous asked:

“you’re cute when you’re mad.” dean winchester

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

“Dean?” You asked, somewhat nervously. He turned to you, eyes narrowed. He knew that you’d done something wrong, “I… I ate the last slice of pie.”

His face dropped. He certainly hadn’t been expecting that answer, “What? Uh, excuse me, what?!”

“I’m sorry… It just looked so good and it tasted delicious!” 

Dean glared at you, “I’d been looking forward to that slice all day and you ate it?!”

You couldn’t help but smile, “You know, you’re cute when you’re mad.”

Dean pulled a disgusted face, “First you eat my pie and next you call me cute?! Ugh!”