and then i'm too perfectionist

Today's shadow work topic is: perfectionism and how that fucks you up

My fellow perfectionists, lend me your ears

I have some thing I learned recently that is very fucking helpful and explained a thing to me

What is your exact thought process when you start a thing? I don’t care what the thing is, whether it’s a new exercise regimen or a job or a new relationship

If your thought process is “I need to succeed at this thing” you are automatically approaching the thing the wrong way, because imposing arbitrary standards on yourself with ideas like succeeding at things that don’t have metrics for that divorces you emotionally and mentally from the thing

Basically, what I’m saying is the soul really likes to shrivel up and die in conditions in which your goal is “success”. You might be happy when you perceive yourself doing “well” at the thing, only to experience the crash later if you get fired or the relationship ends or something else and the problem with this is in some degree you probably placed some of your self worth on a thing can can end or be taken from you

The healthier thing to do is embark on a thing, like a new job or a move or a relationship and tell yourself “I’m just going to try this new thing, and if it doesn’t work out, it will be a learning experience and I will have some new memories to look over”

If you approach a new experience as a playful thing, and not this hyper serious obsessive desire to succeed at the thing, the soul gets a chance to be engaged and you begin to live the experience for the sake of the experience, and not for the ideal of succeeding or being respected or some kind of external validation that becomes, later, a dependency issue that rears its ugly head when you get fired or broken up with or fall on hard health times

Basically, if you approach things in your life as opportunities for growth instead of a constant barrage of tests that if you do well enough on, out will come your happiness tokens, you will generally accidentally fall into happiness before you even notice, and start living for the sake of it and appreciating the people in your life more for who they are rather than what they can do

youtube

Vera Kelly - Unconsolable (X Ambassadors Cover)

Not perfect, but trying to get myself out there again. I love this song a lot and I first played it about 3 years ago or something. Thought I should share it someday.

On a scale from 1 to Niall keeping his Instagram Aesthetic how committed are you?

aaaaand we have the sibs! They’re twin babs so matching jackets ;P If ya’ll wanna read me rambling about them then clickie the read more~

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I don’t think I’m a perfectionist because if you try for perfection, it’s too much pressure. But I’m probably a nightmare to work for … I tend to tell people something once and then I expect that it will be done correctly from that moment on. But I can’t help it – I see things other people don’t and I know how to fix it, how to make it look better. I don’t know how I know that, I just do.
—  Lisa Vanderpump

the happiest place on earth

an: I literally don’t even know where this came from but all of a sudden I’m writing Disney World fluff and Captain Hook is riding Splash Mountain with Prince Charming and all was right in my world. I hope this counts as domestic fluff, @odonorude, because it’s what came out. 

(also let’s please all go blame @swans-and-pirates because she begged me for it)


It is on Emma’s birthday that she finally gets to go to Disney World. She’d always dreamed of going there as a kid, but never thought she’d have the chance. But, thanks to Regina and some magic trickery, Emma finally has her chance.

Granted, it’s only for the weekend, and it’s a huge family trip, complete with schedules printed weeks in advance and guide maps memorized, as well as traveling partners assigned.

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Colouring tutorial

So, I was asked to show how I colour my gifs and thought I’d put together a little tutorial.

I will be going from this:

to this:

I’m using Photoshop CS6 Extended and will be using the timeline animation to make my gif. But if you use the frame animation that works just as well. Just make sure you’re standing on the first frame when you add the layers.

I put the full tutorial under a read more because it got a bit lengthy. I hope you like it! (p.s. this colouring works on a lot of different shows and movies)

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