and then i'm going to shoot you

Introducing I’m gay heals

So I noticed how                I am Gay.  Sometimes    it                                                    tit               

                                            created Im Gay Heals.

  •    I am an extremelyGay individual. I will

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Thank you guys for reading  I really gay

Lets play a game called Protect the Pidge!

Watching Voltron Legendary Defender I began to notice something that the entire team has in common: they all without question protect Pidge. The team will go out of their way to make sure Pidge is safe, and anyone who attacks Pidge is immediately dealt with. 

Pidge draws the attention of the commander?

Turn the commander’s attention onto you.

Falling down a slide of death? Put Pidge on your shoulders out of reach.

Pidge is almost never standing by themself. Someone is always near them, and normally? It’s Shiro and Hunk, the two biggest guys on the team.

You will almost never see Pidge on the edge of the group, Pidge is never exposed. 

Not even the sloth thing touches the Pidge.

Everyone else is complaining? We can keep going. Pidge has a breakdown? REST TIME.

It was all verbal until the Princess threw food goop at Pidge?

GAME ON, ALLURA. Immediate retaliation from Keith.

There’s a thing falling at you, no way is Shiro going to let his Pidge get squished.

Nothing harms the Pidge.

Alien has Pidge held in painful grip, rest of the team can’t do anything?


In short? Pidge is precious and must be protected at all costs. You touch Pidge? The rest of the team will make you regret it.

Dangerous Loyalty RP Starters
  • "It scares me what I'm willing to do for you."
  • "I don't care about anyone else, you're all that matters to me!"
  • "You know you can't refuse me anything I ask of you."
  • "You know I'd never refuse anything you asked of me."
  • "Say the word and I'm yours forever."
  • "If you love me as much as you say, then prove it."
  • "It's time that you proved your loyalty to me."
  • "I'll serve you forever if you'll allow me to do it."
  • "What will it take to make you go back on your oath of loyalty?"
  • "Will you trust me with the rest of your life?"
  • "My life is in your hands."
  • "You're going to take this gun, you're going to pull the trigger and you're going to shoot them. And do you know why? Because I told you to do it."
  • "I'd die if you asked me to."
  • "You would die if I asked you to."
  • "I could stab you in the heart and you would still come crawling back."
  • "You can do anything you want to me, I don't care!"
  • "I'll take the fall for you."
  • "I want you to take the fall for me."
  • "I could never act against you, not even to defend myself."
  • "My safety isn't important! You're what matters!"
  • "If hurting me is what makes you happy, then I'm only happy to indulge you."
  • Slytherin: *is faking sick in bed with the flu to get out of exams*
  • Hufflepuff: Oh you poor thing. I will make soup and stay by your side until you are feeling like your old self
  • Slytherin: *shoots Ravenclaw a panicked look*
  • Ravenclaw: Well actually Madam Pomfrey gave me this brew that cures the flu in the matter of minutes
  • Ravenclaw: *pulls out their water bottle and hands it to Slytherin*
  • Slytherin: *sips the water* You know what? I'm starting to feel better already. How about we go get some lunch?
  • *All start walking out of the dorm*
  • Slytherin: *whispering* Thank you
  • Ravanclaw: *nods*
BTS as police officers
  • Seokjin: gives himself a ticket because it's illegal to look that good.
  • Rapmon: tries to stop the criminal but accidentally tribs over and shoots his foot.
  • Suga: I'm going to the office (disappears)goes to sleep behind the coby-machine
  • J-hope: screams every time he gets called out to help causing everyone to panic and then he ends up fainting
  • Jimin: Ms. do you have a look this good ;) (winks five times and then gets slapped in the face).
  • Taehyung: chewing on his gun because...well it's Taehyung..
  • Jungkook: is the only cop that actually does everything right because well..he ain't called golden maknae for nothing!
  • Aries: I'm smarter than I look... *grabs boobs* DO YOU CALL THIS IMMATURE?!
  • Taurus: I don't want to be here. I want to be in a spa being fed a nice taco... Preferably chicken.
  • Gemini: She better not steal my thunder or I will literally punch her in the face.
  • Cancer: I respect you for shoveling the poopy. I do. I really, really do. It takes a lot of courage and a really blind sense of smell to shovel that poopy. But I had a really serious hand situation, and I just couldn't shovel that poop.
  • Leo: My heart is golden, but my vageen is platinum.
  • Virgo: I'm a good person... I'm not just saying that.
  • Libra: I feel like I'm not being myself, but I'm trying really hard to be myself, but because I'm trying so hard to be myself it's making me even more not myself.
  • Scorpio: I'm a corn husk; you gotta pull all the layers back, and in the middle is this luxury, yellow corn with all these pellets of information. And it's juicy, and buttery. You want to get to that corn.
  • Sagittarius: I didn't go into this photo shoot with no clothes. I was daring enough to actually have clothes, then take them off.
  • Capricorn: I'm really pissed. She re-interrupted me, which I think is very rude. I interrupted Taylor and she re-interrupted me.
  • Aquarius: Today was just a dream come true. I stepped out of my comfort zone, many times and angles. Dad would be proud, even though I was naked.
  • Pisces: I didn't mean to offend anyone by taking that nap... Michael Jordan took naps. Abraham Lincoln took naps. And I'm in trouble for napping?!

Magnus: If me and Alex were both drowning, who would you save?
TJ: I don’t know, both of you.
Magnus: No. If you could only save one of us?
TJ: Well, I would probably save Alex because she can’t swim and I happen to know you’re an excellent swimmer.
Magnus: Suppose I was holding an anchor? … Who would you save then?
TJ: Well, why don’t you let go of the anchor?
Magnus: It’s a family heirloom.
TJ: I’m leaving.

Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris in the library
  • Eric: "Get up!"
  • Dylan: "GET UP!"
  • Eric: "Stand up right now or we'll blow your fucking heads off!"
  • Dylan: "Fine I'll start shooting then..." (shoots Velasquez) "Woohoo!"
  • Dylan: "All jocks stand up... white baseball cap"
  • Eric: "Pigs are here..." (begins firing out the window)
  • Dylan: (shoots Hall, Ireland, Steepleton) "Yahoo!"
  • Patti Nielson: "our father... who art in heaven.. hallowed be thy name"
  • Dispatcher: "ma'am, you need to forget about praying right now. What's happening there?"
  • Nielson: "They're in here.. they're killing kids... I have to go." (drops phone)
  • Eric: (kills Curnow) "Die! Motherfucker!"
  • Dylan: "WOO!"
  • Kasey Ruegsegger: (after being shot by Eric) "Oh!"
  • Eric: "Stop your bitching! It's merely a flesh wound,"
  • Dylan: (laughing hysterically)
  • Eric: "Peek-a-boo" (kills Bernall)
  • Dylan: (shoots Ireland) "Die! ...down on the floor!"
  • Dylan: "REB?"
  • Eric: "Yeah?"
  • Dylan: "hey, man... there's a nigger over here."
  • Eric: "shoot him"
  • Dylan: "SHIT YEAH!"
  • Shoels: "!"
  • (Shoels and Kechter killed)
  • (CO2 bomb detonates)
  • Valeen Schnurr: "oh my god... help me..."
  • Eric: "do you believe in God?"
  • Valeen: "no..yes..."
  • Dylan: "Why?"
  • Eric: "God is gay."
  • John TOmlin: "Don't... done enough?"
  • (shots fired)
  • Dylan: "You think we've done enough?" (laughing)
  • Eric: "nice glasses" (shots fired.. sounds of a scuffle.. shots fired again.. Mauser killed)
  • Dylan: "was he trying to jump you?"
  • Eric: "Yeah"
  • (shots fired... DePooter killed)
  • Dylan: "Look what we have here..."
  • Eric: "What?"
  • Dylan: "just some fat fuck"
  • Dylan: "give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you."
  • Evan Todd: "I don't want to get into trouble"
  • Dylan: "Trouble! You don't know what trouble is..."
  • Evan Todd: "That's not what I mean... I don't have a problem with you guys..."
  • Dylan: "I'm going to let this fat fuck live... little fat fucking piece of shit... you can have him if you want."
  • Eric: "Let's go to the commons"
  • Dylan: "One more thing" (sound of something smashing)
  • Dylan: "Reb, ya ready?"
  • Remus: what's wrong?
  • Sirius: nothing... it's just that adults are boring and i hate them. and i don't want to buy all this stupid, boring, adult stuff and become boring adults.
  • Remus: hey, listen to me. yes, we're going to get a dish rack and shower curtains and a cutting board... but if you think for one second that i'm not also going to get that marshmallow shooter so that i can shoot you in the face with marshmallows when you're asleep, then you're the dumbest man i know.
  • Sirius: you're gonna make me cry.

I want to say thank you first to my family, who have been the motivation of my life.

Thank you so much to Bang Shihyuk PD-nim, Vice President Choi Yoojung, Director Yoon Seokjoon, Director Kim Shinkyu, Director Lee Hyuk, Director Chaeeun who always help us become a cool BTS. I’ll work hard with the same mindset as my debut days.

Hobeomie-hyung, Sejinie-hyung, Sungseokie-hyung, Jungilie-hyung, Yoonjae-hyung, Sunhakie, Kwangtaekie-hyung who always silently take care of us from behind, thank you and I love you!!

Bighit’s music team that worked really hard this time too, Pdogg-hyung, Dohyungie-hyung, Donghyukie, Joonsangie, Changwonie-hyung, Jooyoungie-hyung, Bosungie-hyung, Wooyoung-nim, you’re the top in Korea.

Sunghyunie-hyung, Hyunjoo-noona, Sunkyung-noona, Gabriel-hyung, teacher Sungdeuk who give Bangtan wonderful wings, thank you for give us really wonderful wings this time too.

People who help Bangtan every minute, every second, Woojung-noona, Surin-noona, Hyunji-noona, Bunhong-nim, Seolhee-noona, Joowon-nim, Jooyeon-nim, Joy-nim, team leader Heesun, Hayan-noona, Jinah-nim, Kyungjin-nim, Sunho-nim, Hyeyoung-nim, Iseul-noona, Nayeob-noona, Yoori-nim, Onnuri-nim, Hyekki-hyung, Eunjung-nim, Eunsang-nim, Junho-nim, team leader Jaedong, Jungwook-nim, Junsu-nim, Hyunmin-nim, Sunjung-noona, Mijung-noona, Seungwoo-nim, Yeonhee-nim, Hyewon-nim, Miryung-nim, Yeji-nim, thank you so much. Thanks to you BTS can carry on activities without any trouble.
Sincerely thank you so much.

Head of Department Hajung, Hyeso-nim, Seoyeon-nim from the style team, thank you for giving us cool styling!

The best Hair & Makeup team, Head of Department Naejoo, Head of Department Dareum, Head of Department Jihye, Jinyoung-nim, Hyunah-nim, Seolji-nim, thank you for creating our images.
Korea’s best video team, Director Lum, Director Hyunwoo, Director Sunwook, thank you for shooting cool videos for us this time too!!!

Our ARMYs who give us excessive love every album!
Thank you so much and I love you.
I’ll come to find you with cool music and cool performances.

I love you!!

Jin | Suga | J-hope | Rap Monster | Jimin | V | Jungkook

Why is it so hard to tell a girl you like her??!

Originally posted by haidaspicciare

Imagine if FAHC Jeremy tried to act as innocent as Jeremy did on Off Topic. 

I’m not rowdy. He says pouring a shot. 

I’m nothing like you guys. He says, after holding up a bank. 

I was a good a kid, didn’t do anything wrong. He says after shooting someone.

I mean, I may be a criminal. But I’m not like the Vagabond. He says after torturing doing an interrogation. 

Michael is always there to give him a look and say Are you fucking kidding me?

Well, I mean. Jeremy tries to defend himself. I only kill someone for self defense. 

You shot someone yesterday because Gavin bet you couldn’t hit a person from across the street with your eyes closed. 

I mean. Yeah. 

anonymous asked:

I showed your videos to my dad and he really likes your singing voice (he's a musician by profession), I'm from Europe and so he is considering letting me meet you if you go on tour near me

Awwww! Wow, well shoot, that means a lot to hear from a musician!! I would love it if this could happen!!

Every Totally Spies Episode
  • Alex clover and Sam: omgsh I love clothes let's go shopping
  • Boy: hey
  • Clover: I'm hecka in love
  • Sam and Alex: dang it not again clover
  • Mandy: not so fast clover, i saw him first!
  • Clover: Grrrrr
  • Alex Sam and clover: *gets sucked into trash can*
  • Jerry: hello girls nice of you to DROP in
  • Girls:
  • Jerry:
  • Girls:
  • Jerry: here are your gadgets, go find out what the Hades is wrong with people going missing
  • Girls: *goes to some other country*
  • Obvious bad guy: who r u???
  • Girls: we're not spies.
  • Bad guy: okayyyyyy but I'm suspicious of you....
  • Sam: let's look for evidence!
  • Alex: gross! What's that on the floor!
  • Sam: ill send it to whoop for analysis.
  • One of the girls: *gets captured*
  • Jerry: how goes it?
  • The other two: not good! The other girl got captured!
  • Jerry: well here's the analysis for that thing it will lead you to the bad guys hideout.
  • The other two: *goes to bad guy hideout*
  • The other two: *fights henchman*
  • The other two: *gets captured*
  • Bad guy: here's my plan to take over the world, now I'm just going to leave you here to die because I'm too busy to watch you die or shoot you in the face.
  • Alex: ow my gadget is poking me
  • Sam: Alex your a genius!!!!!!!!!!
  • Alex: what
  • Girls: *escapes*
  • Girls: *beats up previous henchman*
  • Girls: *beats up bad guy just in time*
  • Jerry: *flies in with a random fleet of professionals* good work girls
  • Girls: thanks*goes home*
  • Clover: I'm over said boy now
  • Mandy: yay
  • Clover: wait jk
  • Alex and Sam: *facepalm*
2017 Tony Nominated Musicals as things my friends have said
  • Dear Evan Hansen: I can't speak correctly most of the times
  • Dear Evan Hansen (Alternatively): Fuck you and your leaves.
  • Come From Away: This, ladies an gentleman, is why Canada is killing us these days
  • Come From Away (Alternatively): I'm so nice, I should win the Nobel Prize for Niceness.
  • The Great Comet: Heck the Russian Rules!
  • The Great Comet (Alternatively): French water is wine. The fish died because they got drunk. At least they died lit.
  • Groundhog Day: Guess I'll have to shout more profanities. Heck! Shoot!
  • Groundhog Day (Alternatively): The forecast calls for me being a straight up bitch.
  • Falsettos: Being sick builds character.
  • Falsettos (Alternatively): I'm going to wear a tux to my party where I eat ice cream and cry because I'll never get a Tony.
  • Hello Dolly: No Heck! Just Heck!
  • Miss Saigon: I'm not a loser. I'm a winner who's just not good at winning things.
  • Anastasia: The French is a lovely place.
  • Bandstand: Jazz has everything to do with witchcraft!
  • Holiday Inn: I think they're taking the whole "Irving Berlin" thing a little too seriously.
  • War Paint: Everyone is a bitch, Patti Lupone.
Criminal Minds ladies as things I've done
  • Jennifer Jareau: I somehow befriended the group of popular mean girls in 5th grade but my teacher knew I didn't want to be there and recruited me as a spy so I spent the whole year reporting every bad thing they did
  • Kate Callahan: friended every person on facebook who was awful to me in elementary–high school so they can see how rad my life is now and how hot I got
  • Ashley Seaver: in 7th grade I got wind some kid wanted to ask me out in gym class the day we were running the mile so I ran extra fast to get away from him and I set a school record by accident
  • Elle Greenaway: a few months ago I beeped my horn at a passing male jogger just to scare the bejesus out of him and exact that good petty revenge for all the years I've spent being catcalled and I'm not sorry
  • Penelope Garcia: I act like a bad bitch but I cry at least once a week because of my cat being cute
  • Emily Prentiss: when I was 3 my balloon floated away and I was throwing a tantrum so my dad was like ”what do you want me to do about it” and I screamed ”SHOOT IT DOWN!!!!!!!!!”
  • Alex Blake: when I have to go to gatherings at bigot asshole family members' houses instead of being a bitch I smile and make nice then later steal all of their toilet paper and alcohol
  • Tara Lewis: whenever people mispronounce my name I don't correct them I just make a mental hit list on who to fuck up first if the purge was real
Be More Chill Pt. 1
  • Squip: add some swagger to your gate or you'll look like a masturbator
  • Jeremy: but I am a masturbator
  • Squip: I guess you could say you're playing a...
  • Jeremy: wait don't
  • Squip: <b> a one-player game </b>
  • Jeremy: I'm going to shoot up this mall if you ever say something like that again
I'm A Very Good Girl

I always obey my parents. Don’t jump on the furniture, Don’t tease the dog, Eat your veggies.

They always want what’s best for me and I try hard to be the best daughter in the world.

Safety first, daddy loved to say. Whether we were going to a playground or riding the bus, he was very focused on keeping mommy and me safe from harm. Years ago, he even taught me to safely shoot his beloved rifle.

I think that’s why he moved us out to the country. Our nearest neighbor is on the western horizon and you can only see their chimney when standing on the cliffs behind our house. It’s always so nice and quiet out here. Lonely at times, but very comfortable.

It got even lonelier a few weeks ago when Bucky, our two year old Golden Retriever, got real sick and died. I miss him so much. Daddy buried him at the base of the cliffs and I used to visit his grave almost every day. He was just a dog, though. We can always get another one.

I can’t as easily get a new mommy.

The last time I saw her was three days ago talking with daddy in the backyard. She got real sick after coming home from her monthly grocery run in the city and she slept for days. I really thought she was getting better until she started coughing up blood and her skin began to look like pea soup. Daddy hasn’t let me go in the backyard since then.

There’s a fresh mound of dirt next to Bucky’s. I miss her so much.

For the last two days, daddy has been sitting at the top of the cliffs, watching and waiting. The groceries mommy brought home will feed me for another month, but after that, I don’t know what I’ll do.

I used to pass the time by listening to the radio, but lately, all they broadcast are emergency warnings about some deadly virus spreading across country. I hear them use the term “reanimated” a lot. I turned it off yesterday and am too scared to turn it back on.

I can hear daddy’s deep cough echoing down the rocks at night. I don’t want anything to happen to him. I don’t want to be alone, but I promised him I’ll do whatever he tells me as I know he only wants the best.

I need you to listen to me, Sarah, he told me yesterday. I’m not going to let this sickness get to me like it did your mother. I’ll end it before it gets too bad.

I’m a very good girl, so this morning when he told me, When you see me hit the ground at the bottom of the cliffs, do not approach me when I get back up. You’ll need to shoot me in the head, I cried but obeyed. He also taught me how to board up the house for after that happens.