and then i waited years for you to be off the tudors

Only Us (Part 2)

Pairing: Peter Parker (Tom Holland) x Reader

Summary:  What happens when the reader saves Spiderman…while he’s saving you?(kind of? I don’t know. Fuck it.)

Word Count: 2388

Warning(s): Mean parents, swearing, and slightly sexual remarks.

Additional Notes: Frank Gallagher is a character int the TV show Shameless(it’s amazing please watch it) and he is pretty much always drinking. (Also if you would like to be tagged for every part of this series let me know by commenting or something else idk)

Part 1

My phone rang loudly as light crept in from the window. Fuck. I thought as my eyes focused on the time on the far wall of my small bedroom. 6:15. I hated school. I groaned getting up turning of my alarm, yawning and stretching. I tugged my short shorts down that I slept in overnight and opened the door walking to the bathroom avoiding the beer bottles that littered the dark carpet. My hand reached for the door before it was yanked open. A middle aged man stood in front of me wearing only his boxers. I shuttered stepping back.

“Who do we have here?” He grinned down at me. I shivered taking another step back.

“Who the hell are you?” I asked glaring at him fear still gripping me.

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anonymous asked:

Can you tell me your top 5 of Benedict's performances? I know it's hard but I'm curious :)


This is the most challenging question to ever receive as a Bc fan. The faves change from day to day, from moment to moment and from gif to gif (thanks to amazing gifers like @elennemigo, @221bcumberb, @anidoorkitty and @whenisayrunrun ) luckily you have caught me on a day where I’ve been making clips for a future post and have come down with a case of CBF! So being in this state of mind, I think it’s a perfect time to do this list so here it is.

 *warning long post*

1. Richard iii

Bc takes us through the rise and fall of Richards thirst for the crown. From the moment we see young Richard cowering in horror while watching his brother being murdered, to the minute he decides to kill the king, not for his family, not for revenge but for his own dream of sovereignty, and to witnessing Henry Tudor stabbing the last breath out of Richard and proclaiming the “the dirty dog is dead”.

Bc delivers Richards devilish, smooth talking and deliciously devious dialogue with such ease that you can’t help but kind of root for Richard at times because he makes you believe that his Machiavellian dealings are for the greater good. His bone chilling cradling of his newborn nephew, his wooing of the widow of the man he killed. Are that of a man who just wants to be respected, loved and seen for his use rather than be mocked for his disability that he carries on his back.

Bc’s talent of tears and rage and downright madness was just PERFECT. I fell in love with his Richard iii. I felt pity, sadness, attraction to his wicked determination (as terrible as his deeds were) and most of all, affection for his deformity that was the catalyst for his anger and need to prove to the people around him that he could be a normal man that was capable of being a king. Bc’s Richard iii was the best possible example of a master class in acting. Proving yet again that Bc is the best actor of his generation.

2. Sherlock 

The greatest disappointment to come out of BBC Sherlock was the reaction of a group of fans who tried to destroy what MG and SM created because of a certain expectation they were invested in. Most people who hated S4 missed out on what the entire point of this version of Sherlock was about and that was to introduce us to Sherlock Holmes before he became known as Sherlock Holmes. Bc became a star in 90 minutes and the ACD canon would never be the same again.

Sherlock starts off as a man with a fortress of coldness who insists he has no need for friends or relationships, armed with a lifetime of brotherly advice that caring was not an advantage. But once Dr. John Watson comes into play we start to see that fortress slowly melt and the addition of the people who would become his Baker Street family, Molly Hooper, Mrs. Hudson, Mary Watson and Lestrade, we begin to see that Sherlock was so full of emotions and the capacity to care, that he wanted to care, he just didn’t know how to care. Bc’s portrayal of the world’s only consulting detective was brilliant and beautiful. Bc help make brainy the new sexy. He also made Sherlock’s drugged out alter ego, Shezza, look sexy too. Of course it helped that the writing and the location of this modern day Sherlock were also brilliant. But looking at those cheekbones and lips carrying a fluffy head of hair that you wish you could run your fingers through, just once! That perfect silhouette of a man dressed in the finest suits. The purple shirt of sexiness, the black suit, the blue shirt of sexiness!! Ok sorry I got CBF for a second there…

What I really meant to say was that Bc’s acting brought new life into this 100 year old literary character and it certainly made me invest my own feelings into these characters that I wouldn’t have any interest in. Bc’s Sherlock was rude, cocky, manipulative, arrogant and flawed, but you loved each of those characteristics because Bc made him lovable even at Sherlock’s worst, he took you through the whole range of emotions and that wasn’t just with one series, it frequently meant each episode! The fact that we got to watch Sherlock grow into a man capable of being a best friend, a kind and caring human being who tried his best to protect his friends, and a man who learned how to forgive and not judge the past mistakes of those around him. Because after all we just might be human. Even Sherlock Holmes. I am forever grateful to the Mofftiss for creating this show and for giving Bc a chance to show the world, what the London stage and various other people in the industry had already saw in him. For me the only Sherlock Holmes is the BBC version that could only have been pulled off by the talents and efforts of Benedict Cumberbatch.

3. Christopher Tietjens

My first thought is always I heart Christopher Tietjens, because I really do. He was the last of a dying breed. He had 2 women who tried to “burst him out of his glass cabinet” the wife who failed because she didn’t deserve him and the woman whom he really loved and waited for, the woman HE deserved. Christopher survived his name being dragged through the mud, a wife who socially embarrassed not only herself but made him look like a cuckold. 

He survived the war, not because he was lucky, but because he wanted to live to come back to the only woman who loved him and accepted him for going along with the parade. Bc’s Christopher Tietjens was a stoic beautiful man when he needed to be, and man enough to cry when the women he loved tugged or threw daggers at his heart.

I know I overuse the word beautiful when it comes to Bc’s acting but Chrissy was so painfully beautiful that all you wanted to do was give him a hug and take him back to Groby so he could live out the rest of his life as an english country gentleman. Another perfect performance from Benedict!

4. Alan Turing

This should have won Bc’s his first Oscar. If you want to truly see what Bc’s talent is capable of you don’t start with Sherlock, you start with this role. Benedict was able to conjure up the spirit of Alan in this performance that even Turing’s own family was blown away by his portrayal. Bc’s ability to display the eccentricities of Alan, the deep emotional bond and love he had for both Christophers and of course Bc’s master class of acting for easily portraying a genius mathematician at work.

The tragic ending that cut Alan’s life short, made us all want to learn more about Turing and his work. It made us angry at how this man was treated as an enemy, instead of a war hero who helped saved millions of lives. Bc reached into our hearts and brains with his charismatic, tragic, beautiful portrayal of Alan Turing.

5. Doctor Strange

IF ever a role was so perfectly cast it probably was Benedict as Dr. Stephen Strange. Not only does he come super close to looking like the comic book hero that was created over 30 yrs ago, he is able to adopt the persona of an arrogant and brilliant doctor who gets into a car accident that cuts his career short and with all hope lost, seeks treatment at a place that not only gives him the cold hard truth about himself, but it teaches him that in order to grow and learn he would have to open his eye to other realities.  

Stephen learned that all is not lost and there are other ways to help people, most of all, to help himself. Bc is so bloody perfect as Doctor Strange that upon first viewing, I just sat there and cried. I was so proud of him because even though I had very limited knowledge about this comic book character, he convinced me that HE was that superhero that the world needed. Benedict made it all look effortlessly. The American accent, the physicality of being Doctor Strange was just AMAZING. Bc has that ability to make himself into anything that is called for. As someone once said, young, old, strong, weak, whatever you call for that character to be, Benedict can play it and play it so well you don’t even know he’s acting. Not only did it convince us his fan base, but he basically won over the entire comic book community as well as the general public. 

Bc made Doctor Strange into a blockbuster that got overall positive reviews. That is the power of Benedict’s talent. You talk about a good script, you can talk about a good director, but that only goes hand in hand with an actor that can pull it all off and by god did Bc pull it off!

Thanks for stopping by!

Castle on the Hill

English Literature PhD student Emma Swan just needs money to pay for her last semester of grad school tuition. Killian Jones has always dreamed of opening a bookshop but has never been able to afford it. So when the small principality of Misthaven is looking for their lost princess, the pair decide that this might just be the perfect money making scheme.

A Multi-chapter Modern Day + Lost Princess (think Rapunzel/Anastasia-esque) + Book Lovers in a Coffee Shop AU

Rating: T

Word Count: 40791/ ?

Prologue (Part 1 + 2) // Ch 1 // Ch 2 // Ch 3 // Ch 4 // Ch 5 // Ch 6 // Ch 7

Read on: Ao3

Emma wonders how thin the floor below her is. She also wonders if the person who lives below her can tell that she’s been pacing for the last hour. It’s always been her nervous vice- when starting a new family, before English exams, waiting for grad school acceptance letters- she’s always taken to walking in circles. And despite what Killian told her the day before, despite the millions of assurances she’s told herself- it’s not stopping her from walking in circles around her apartment’s floor.

When her phone rings, she flinches before pulling it out of her bag. The phone was an early investment, a Misthaven Sim card so that she’d be able to get calls while here. Now, she extracts her phone from her purse on the counter.

She’d spent hours before worrying over what to wear. What does one wear to meet a queen? She finally settled on a navy knee-length skirt that tied at the waist, a striped blue and white button up, and fake pearl earrings. A little make up, a professional pony tail, and a suitable brown leather tote finished her look.

“Hello?” She says into the phone.

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Mom’s Past Life Regression: 

So, the man that was the person that led the regression is my old professor. He was trained by Dr Brian Weiss - who was (I believe) the first person to regress people. To learn more about this, you can read Dr Weiss’ book Many Lives Many Masters. The way the regression worked was that between memories, he would tap her forehead 3 times to move her to the next memory, in total she saw 3.

The notes that Prof. took will be written normally, written how he wrote them. Questions he asked will be in [brackets].

First memory: 

- [Prof: Where are you?] Field, moor grass, little flowers, in springtime. [Prof: Look down at your feet, what do you see?] Brown shoes, a long dress. [Prof: Now look up, at your face, what do you see?] Brown hair. [Prof: What’s your name? How old are you?] Annah, I’m 23. [Prof: Look around, Annah, what do you see around you?] There’s woods far off, woods, farmhouse, my home. [Prof: What are you doing out in the field, Annah?] I went for a walk to the pond. [Prof: Now, I want you to look at your left hand. Do you have a wedding ring?] No. [Prof: How do you feel about that?] Content. The Opportunity hasn’t come up yet. [Prof: What about in your house, Annah, is anyone there?] There’s family in the house. Someone waiting for me. I feel warmth and love, I think it’s my mother, but I’m not sure. [Prof: Where do you live?] In the USA. [Prof: What year is it, Annah? You know this.] It’s 1740. [Prof: What about your father, where is he?] He’s behind the house, working. [Prof: Do you have siblings?] Maybe. They’re not at home.


- [Prof: Now where are you? What do you see?] I’m in a city, I see stone streets. It’s dusk. It’s cold and damp, I can smell the dampness in the air. I’m hiding. [Prof: Are you a man or a woman?] Man. I’m peeking around… like the corner of a wall. Someone wants to find me. [Prof: Can you look down at your feet, what do you see?] Dark shoes. Dark pants. Dark blue or black pants, maybe dark blue. [Prof: Now look at your face, what do you look like?] I have a mustache and beard. Dark brown hair. [Prof: Where are you? What city?] I want to say London but I keep hearing Copenhagen. [Prof: That’s alright. What year is it?] 1853. [Prof: Oh, specific, good. What are you doing?] I’m trying to find a pub. A bar. To get safe. He wants to find me. [Prof: Do you know him?] Yeah, we were in business together. There was a falling out? I feel like we’re both bad guys, we stole something. [Prof: What’s your name?] Michael. [Prof: Do you know the other man’s name?] Don, or Bob. Something like that. *laughs* We’re just jerks. [Prof: Oh, you’re just jerks? But you stole something. Con men?] Yeah. But I have the money *laughs* I took the money from him. [Prof: Look around you again, what do you see?] Narrow roads. The buildings are like… tudor style. There’s white wood trim and window boxes. It’s dirty, not nice. It just finished raining, I can see my breath. My throat feels tight, I feel like eventually he finds me. Something bad happens. 


- [Prof: Where are you now?] In the army. There’s shooting, war. I’m wearing green, and a hat. There’s lots of guys, lots of noise. [Prof: What year is it?] 1943. [Prof: You said you’re in the army, what army are you fighting for?] US. [Prof: Where are you fighting?] Germany. [Prof: And what’s your name?] Jim. I’m in the infantry. [Prof: What’s going on around you?] There’s something behind me. It’s chaos. I’m nervous, cold. I’m sick and tired of being dirty. I’m sitting in front of a wall of sandbags. It’s nighttime. I wish this would end. I just want to have a cigarette [note: my mom does not smoke] and want it to be quiet. My heart’s pounding. There’s a grenade. Someone threw it over it landed in front of me. I can’t move… I .. I think I’m dead. But there’s no relief. 


- [Prof: What do you see?] I’m back at the beginning. I see the door I went through first. [Prof: That means you don’t want to move forward anymore, that’s alright, we can stop.] Okay.

Support Group for People Unfairly Maligned in Historical Fiction

Edward II: Greetings, everyone!  I’m Edward of Caernarfon, as you probably all know - do feel free to call me Ned - and I’m your moderator for this, the second meeting of all of us unfortunate historical folks maligned in fiction of the twenty-first century.  We’re here to share our pain, and to share the sillinesses perpetuated about us written hundreds of years after our deaths.  I’ll get us started.  As well as all the unfair and wildly untrue things about me I shared at our last meeting, there’s some new stuff.  According to one novelist, I react to things by ‘snivelling’ and am a coward who runs away from the battlefield of Bannockburn and is too afraid to fight, even though in reality I had to be dragged protesting from the field and fought 'like a lioness deprived of her cubs’ right in the thick of battle.

Piers Gaveston: Pretty damn sure I never saw you snivel, Ned.  I bet the terribly heterosexual manly hero Roger Mortimer doesn’t 'snivel’ in that novel, eh?

Edward II: Damn right, he doesn’t.  That same novel also accuses me of cowardice because I don’t beat up my wife, which was a real lolwut?? moment, I tell you.

Margaret Beaufort: May I have the floor, Ned?  I, apparently, am a religious maniac with a weirdly anachronistic Joan of Arc fetish - why? I mean, why?! - which I have to talk about every five minutes.  I mysteriously forget that I’m the countess of Richmond all the time.  But worst of all by far, I’m meant to have had Edward IV’s two sons murdered in the Tower of London so that my own son Henry Tudor could become king.  Because obviously I knew that Richard III’s son would conveniently die young a few months later and clear the path to the throne, and I could stroll in and out of the most fortified and well-guarded stronghold in the country and murder two princes without anyone noticing.  Yup.  Invisible Superwoman, that’s me.

Edward II: That’s awful, Margaret!  You mean people are willing to accuse you of the cold-blooded murder of children when there isn’t the tiniest shred of evidence whatsoever?

Margaret Beaufort: Indeed there are, plenty of them.  There are also people on modern social media who call me a 'snake’ and express a wish that I’d died in childbirth and my son with me.  I was thirteen at the time.  Yes, there really are people out there who wish a thirteen-year-old had suffered a painful death in childbirth.  It seems that they forget we were human beings with feelings too.

George, duke of Clarence: Hey, everyone!  Talking about blatant ways of making us appear really unlikeable and horrible, I’d like to protest at the way novelists in the twenty-first century portray me as this ridiculously one-dimensional alcoholic wife-beater.  That’s all there ever was to me, apparently.  Alcoholism.  And wife-beating.  I never even laid a finger on Isabel!

Henry VII: There’s this one novel where my mother Margaret Beaufort - who just hasn’t been maligned enough, apparently - tells me to rape my fiancée Elizabeth of York before we marry to make sure that she can become pregnant.  If she can’t, I’m to marry her sister Cecily instead.  Still trying to figure that one out - am I supposed to go through all the sisters until I find one who gets pregnant and then marry her?  Just so darn weird.

Elizabeth of York: Wait, let me see that one!  Oh yeah, I remember now, the novel where I spend half the time mooning over my lost uncle Richard III, who I was totally in love with, allegedly, and refer to constantly as 'my lover’.  My uncle.  There is not enough eeeewwwww in my vocabulary.

Henry VII: I’m depicted as this pathetic little mummy’s boy half the time.  And I’ve been trying to block the horror of it out of my mind, but there’s another novel that has me - get this, folks - drinking the blood of young men.  Like wuuuuuuh?

Elizabeth of York: I don’t know.

Edward II: You don’t know what?

Elizabeth of York: I don’t know what I don’t know.  I don’t know anything.  Say anything to me and I’ll reply that I don’t know.

Elizabeth Woodville: Hey, everyone, did you know I’m a witch?  Witch witch witch.  Who makes witchy things happen all the witching time.  Because I’m a witch.  A witchy witch who does lots of witchy things.  On every witchy page of the witchy novel about how I’m a witch.

Anne Neville: I’m getting pretty annoyed with the way I’m almost always depicted as terribly frail, to the point where I faint or collapse about every five minutes.  Yes, I died young, but that doesn’t mean I’d been a permanent invalid all my life, people!  Yeesh, it’d be great to have someone write me as though I had an actual backbone and some personality, instead of as this weak feeble fainting little…thing.

Edward of Lancaster: True, and it’d be nice if someone would acknowledge that you didn’t necessarily spend your entire marriage to me weeping and wailing over Richard of Gloucester.

Anne Neville: I did a little bit at first maybe, just a tiny little bit, but I soon got used to the idea of being queen of England one day.  That was pretty cool.  Something else modern novelists never seem to realise about me is that maybe I had a bit of ambition and quite fancied being a queen!

Edward of Lancaster: Yeah, we kind of got used to being married to each other and didn’t mind it at all, did we?  And you know, it’s so unfair when a throwaway bravado comment you make when you’re still practically a child is then used for the next half a millennium as though it represents the sum total of your personality and is constantly used to present you as a sadistic murderous psychopath.  Modern people, would you like it if someone took one of your sulky adolescent pronouncements as though it’s representative of your entire life and attitudes?

Henry VI: And when one remark by one visitor to England, simply reporting a rumour he had heard that I supposedly said that my son Edward was fathered by the Holy Ghost, is taken that my son absolutely must have been fathered by someone else other than me.  As though my wife Margaret of Anjou isn’t maligned enough!

Margaret of Anjou: Oh, you mean I actually have a name?  Like seriously?  I thought I was just called 'the bad queen’.  Voice dripping with sarcasm here.

Elizabeth of York: I don’t know.

Edward II: Afraid we’re running out of time and will have to wrap this up now, folks!  Hope you all feel somewhat better after getting this rubbish off your chests, and take care until the next meeting of the Support Group for People Maligned in Historical Fiction!  Goodnight!

- Kathryn Warner from her blog (excepts about the Wars of The Roses historical fiction)

A Waste of Time

“I decided not to waste my years planning dances and masquerades with the other noble ladies.”

Stop. No. Bad. Wrong.

That is a line from 2.08 (“The Prince of Winterfell), from Talisa Maegyr to Robb Stark in one of their relationship development scenes. The line is meant to demonstrate that Talisa is not shallow, that she wishes to do something of substance with her life. While being a battlefield nurse is undoubtedly admirable, the denigration of dances and masquerades here is part misogyny, part misconception. The misogyny comes in where for Talisa to be a “worthy” love interest, she must express distaste for feminine-coded pleasures, and she must almost word for word be “not like other women”. This is emphasised by the beginning of her monologue, where she says “I was raised to be the perfect little lady. To play the harp, and dance the latest steps, and recite Valyrian poetry,” in such a way that shows she has turned her back on these things. 

Liking balls and parties is not inherently shallow as the line implies. Everyone’s got something they enjoy. If you’re one of those people who like parties, A+, I hope you have a great time when next you go out. (If you’re not, also A+, I hope you enjoy your quiet evening wherever.)

Second, and the topic of the majority of this post, is the misconception. The sheer history fail and textual comprehension fail of this line is so great it’s hard to adequately express it. Throughout history, parties amongst the aristocracy have been anything but a waste of time. If courtesy is to be your armour, then a party will be your battlefield.

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The White Princess Live Blog - Ep. 5

I had a lot of feelings about this week’s episode.  Mainly that the episode was utter horse crap.  But, I wrote 6 pages of live notes while watching.  There was a tightfisted sprinkling of decent scenes, but for the most part this episode felt like we were trudging over old ground and gaining nothing plot-wise.  Make sure to click the “read more”

Just want to say, if i hadn’t known there was a 5 year time jump in this episode i think i would have been confused for the first 15 minutes of the episode, since it isn’t explicitly stated in the episode that there has been a skipping forward.

Sooooo dramatic with the backlighting.  Who could this *majestic* figure in silhouette be?


I will never get over how easy it is for these two women to plot.  It just seems so unbelievable.  

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This is a Henry x Lizzie modern au fic inspired by @harritudur’s flatmates au. Thank you dear for allowing me to play in your sandbox!

Henry and Lizzie are uni students in London and share a flat. Enjoy!

“Remind me again why we’re here.”

His voice seemed to have come from far, far away. Lizzie almost didn’t hear it, such was her state of mind. The day was splendidly beautiful. The warm light of the late afternoon covered everything in a golden haze, surprisingly making up for the chilliness of the occasional wind blowing in Regent’s Park. Lizzie had her eyes closed, sunbeams played behind her eyelids to produce the most extraordinary colours. Nothing could spoil that day, not even a mildly cranky Henry Tudor.

“It’s your fault, really.” She slowly opened her eyes to look at him squarely. “You wouldn’t stop nagging me about how I should not get the tube in my condition. You left me no option but to drag you along.”

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So this is really short, but as this is my first foray into the TGC fandom, I hope it will be well-received. He’s a cutie-patootie and I could no longer resist.

Thanks to @ohdaddario who planted the idea to begin with. Feel free to send in prompts.

Summary: He watched her eyes light up with it. Tom/Reader
Warnings: None

“Yeah, so Hampton Court was built by Cardinal Wolsey-”

“For Henry VIII?”

The girl winced and shrugged. “Cardinal Wolsey built Hampton Court for himself, got caught building a palace that was… we’ll say, too grand for his station… so ‘of course, m’lord, this is all for you. I made this so you would have comfortable place to stay when you visit’.” She smiled, painted red lips stretching ironically. “So you’ll see that most of the symbolic craftsmanship reflects his relationship to the king at that time. The king’s seal and those of both Katherine and Anne, are everywhere.”

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Child Brides and Historical Accuracy

@whysogrimm submitted:

Let me start by saying that I absolutely am against child marriage. I know this is going to put me on the defensive, but it seems to me like marriage should wait until age eighteen. But what I have seen is a lot of fans thinking GRRM is adding historical misogyny by having a lot of child brides in his universe. I really wish this were the case, but just from a study of the English royal family you can see it wasn’t unheard of for girls to be married complete with consummation at twelve. Now, keep in mind these are mostly based on estimated birth dates. I’m only using queens because it’s all but impossible to find birth years for girls of noble birth.

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BIRTHDAY // A Joe Sugg Imagine

8th of September 2015 

You woke up with a peaceful and sleeping Joseph Sugg hugging you. Checking your phone out it’s the 8th of September which means it is the birthday of your 2 years long boyfriend, you were planning a surprise birthday party for him but a lot of his mates, even her sister Zoe is kinda busy to party in a Tuesday night.

You carefully removed the duvet from your body and slowly pulling yourself from Joe’s hug and replacing it with a pillow instead. You went upstairs and it seems that Caspar is still sleeping as well. So you’ve decided to cook a breakfast for Joe to be served in bed for his birthday and a breakfast for Caspar as well. You opened your phone, put your headphones on and started playing 1989 in shuffle. You were singing along with Taylor Swift’s “Wildest Dreams” while cooking bacon and eggs and toasting bread for your boyfriend and your best friend, Caspar.

As soon as you finished you took a bath, fix your make up, though Joe don’t want you to wear it as much as possible, and get dressed. Surprisingly Joe is still not up, maybe he was so tired in filming for his Gaming channel last night that you didn’t even realized what time it is that he went to bed with you. So you’ve decided to just put the breakfast you made for Joe on his bedside and write a note saying “Happy Birthday My Love, breakfast in bed smile emoticon Sadly, I need to go in an emergency meeting but I will be back as soon as I can, love u -(y/n)”  but in reality you are not going in any meeting, instead you’re going to Nandos to order some food for today’s lunch, to find a bakeshop where you can buy a cake, and find a gift yes a gift for Joe for you forgot to buy him one.

You went to town and bought yourself a Starbucks to keep you energized for this morning and as you were checking your phone Joe sent you a text and a snap too. You opened his text message first and it was “Where are you and what meeting is that? I hate it when I not see you in the morning especially in my birthday” and that made you feel a little bit bad about what you’ve done but you knew that if he was awake he wouldn’t let you go out so maybe what you did was a pretty good idea. Before making a reply for that you first looked at the snap he sent you it was a picture of the breakfast you made for him and the caption says “thank you but i hate you” and the other snap is him mad and the other one is a picture of him smiling and the caption says “jokes i love you pls b back soon miss u” and so you just took a photo of your shoes and said “I’m walking as fast as I could” and another snap of you sad with a caption “i’ll be back soon. miss u too” and sent him another snap with a pouty lips with a caption “sending kisses” before you kept your phone again for joe would just constantly distract you.

You took a sip of your latte, and entered nandos. You ordered a lunch for Joe, Caspar, Oli, Connor, Jim, Tanya and for yourself too, you paid for the lunch and told the cashier that you will just stop by to get it before you get home. You then go to a  bakeshop nearby to buy 2 cakes one for lunch and one for dinner, told the cashier that you will drop by to get the cake and ask them to deliver the other at 7PM that night. And then you are off to buy Joe a gift.

You first went to Tudor to buy him a watch, you had the idea when you are watching the “sacconejolys” vlog where Anna bought Jonathan a Tudor watch. You bought a “Tudor Heritage Ranger” and let them wrap it up into a gift whilst you’re writing on a card for it, you wrote: “Dear Joseph, this is something that when you look at you might remember me, or remember to come home at night *wink emoji* Happy Birthday, i love you so much” you finished up writing and the girl attached the card to the gift and gave it to you and you placed it in your bag “uhm” the girl from the wrapping station said so you went back and asked her “did i leave anything? is there anything wrong” she answered “oh everything’s ok i mean it’s perfect but aren’t you joe sugg’s girlfriend?” you just smiled and nod at her cuteness, the girl freaked out a little bit and asked you if it is ok if she takes a picture with you and you answered yes excitedly and you two took a picture and then she thanked you and you bid goodbye.

Then you went to American Apparel, you bought Joe a “French Terry Drop-Shoulder Sweatshirt” in Navy Blue, a “Power wash v-neck” in white, a “Fisherman’s pullover”, a ¾ sleeve raglan shirt, ripped jeans, a leather and a leopard print cap, last is a denim tennis shoe. You went and paid for it and left american apparel before you’re tempted to buy some for yourself.

You’re on your way to VS the heaven of lingerie, and met quite a lot of fans which made your 5 minute walk to almost 20. You went in and bought lingerie for yourself and for Joe’s last gift *wink* *wink* and went back to the bakeshop and nandos to get the food you bought and rode a cab. You called Oli, Tanya, and Connor to be on their way to the apartment you guys are staying and they all said that they are on their way.

You arrive at the household and found your guests outside waiting for you to arrive. This wasn’t pretty much planned but you thought that it might be a good idea to surprise him so you texted Caspar to take him downstairs to his room and film. Caspar replied get in @ 10 minutes. So for you not to waste time you pumped up balloons with the gand and fortunately tan and jim brought a balloon with the numbers 2 and 4.

After 10 minutes you guys went inside quietly and they placed the balloons and got the strings which says “happy birthday” you brought out the helium tank and the gang pumped up balloons once again while you prepare the food and the cake you bought you placed your gifts inside your bag for you to give it after lunch. You are just lighting up the candles when Oli suddenly popped a balloon, all of you froze in place when the door downstairs opened. You whispered “places” and run to the center with the cake you almost stumbled bu regained your balance anyway. Joe was running upstairs with a Caspar Lee chasing him and you all sang in chorus a Happy Birthday like it was on cue but it wasn’t. When the song was almost at its end Joe was right in front of you smiling “Happy birthday to you” he closed his eyes and said “I don’t think I even need to wish, when it is already granted and is right here in front of me” and with that he blew the candle. “Gosh I’m hungry” Oli said and led the people to the dinner table, Caspar got the cake from your hands and followed the people. Joe hugged you and kissed your temple as he said thank you for making this day extra special. You dragged him to the table to entertain the guests he didn’t let you go throughout he birthday lunch, he was constantly holding your waist. You two have eaten, there is the giving of gifts, and then it is time to say goodbyes and see you soons.

Caspar went to his room to edit some vlogs to be up for the future. So you and Joe are left. Joe asked you to join him cuddle downstairs but you told him to go and you will just follow him because you still need to fix some things he kissed your hair and told you to not take too long. You got the paper bag and the watch from under the sofa. You hurried down stairs and went to you and Joe’s shared room when Caspar suddenly burst in saying that he needs to fetch a longtime friend from the airport and left instantly that might be pretty important you thought. 

You gave Joseph the American Apparel paperbag and he scanned thru all the things you bought him and he was like how did you know my size and stuff but you just answered him that you two have been together for 2 years now, that you would be a bad girlfriend if you don’t know what his sizes are. He tried on every stuff and you praised because all of it fits well with him and he really love it he hugged you tight and said thank you, then you hand him your second gift which is a watch. He read the letter and looked confused, he opened the thing slowly and confusingly, then he saw the brand and he was like omg he opened it all throughout and his expression was worth the price you paid. He was so overwhelmed with your gift that he was about to kiss you but you stopped him, “I got one last gift love, wait for me here it’s kind of hard to arrange” you said and went inside the bathroom, you peeked thru what he was doing and he was taking snaps and photos. You wore your lingerie you bought from Victoria’s Secret and giggled a little bit. You opened the door slightly and ran to sit at Joe’s lap, he looks a bit surprised but then you look at him straight to the eyes and he smirked when he realized what you were doing and you did the same thing, you smirked back at him.

You reached for your phone and played a sexy song placed it at the bedside and danced at Joe’s lap he was holding your waist while you are dancing and grinding then he threw his face at your neck and kissed it, for he knew for that is where your turning on point is. 

And lets just say the rest is history *wink*

Two Roads Meet - Chapter 11

A/N: I feel as if this chapter is abnormally long idk it probably isn’t but here u go

Summary: Phil Lester, a shy, poetic hipster, is talented at a lot of things; social interaction not being one of them. But when his best friend Tom, a popular socialite, wins a competition for a Road Trip, Phil suddenly finds himself meeting a whole new group of friends, including the total stud Dan Howell; a flirt-machine in a leather jacket. But will Phil’s awkwardly interesting personality intrigue Dan, or completely freak him out?

DISCLAIMER: Obviously (and unfortunately) everything I have written is entirely fictional. I am not claiming Phan is real



“Are you in there?” Amelia made a whiny complaint, turning to Dan and trying to edge him towards her tent. “There’s already 4 people in that one.”
“Which is why it’s a 4 man tent…” Dan shifted his eyes, replying with an uncomfortable grin.
“Come on, I have loads of room in mine.” She jerked her head towards the unzipped door, grabbing Dan’s arm and trying to tug him towards it.
Dan dropped the gaze uncomfortably, his eyes darting back to 3 outraged-looking friends back in the tent where he belonged; one of which being myself, watching the whole thing happen from through a slight crack in our own tent door.
“I’m in this one, though…” Dan glanced over to us weakly. “All my stuff’s in there, too.” He threw in any excuse.
Amelia rolled her eyes. “Never mind the stuff! That’ll take like, 2 seconds to shift.”
“Look, Amelia, why can’t you just leave Dan alone for once? I know it‘s such a lot to ask seeing as you can never keep off his back, but don‘t you think that it would be nice for him to make decisions without you? You know, out of his own accord?” Tom suddenly lost his patience, snapping at the black dressed girl standing opposite him. She gave him a severely offended-sounding gasp, folding her slim arms before giving her hair an infamous toss over her shoulders.

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Earth 2 Harrison part 1

Request: anon-  can you write something (imagine or oneshot) where Harry x reader (they are together) but in Earth 2 the reader already died so when Harry comes to Earth 1 he sees reader and automatically kisses them and the reader slaps him?(either bc she doesn’t know him or bc of Harribard) (and more fluff like him standing next to reader, holding hands, being protective)

A/N I don’t think this necessarily counts as an x reader one shot, so I’m gonna leave it out. Also, I’m gonna do something maybe a little different? This part wil be back story and the next part will be the second part of the request (harry & earth 1)


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Flatmates, Ch. 6

Here’s the latest in the Flatmates AU I’ve been working on.  It’s a bittersweet chapter, I think.  You can catch up on Ao3 here [x].  Thanks to my AU mates @harritudur and @feuillesmortes for all the inspiration you always seem to give me!

“Lizzie, it’s mum.  Just checking in.”  Mum’s voice crackled on the answering machine over the hum of the tape.  “We’ve moved, just so you know.  So Christmas may be a bit hectic this year, darling, everything is still in boxes you know.  Let me give you the address…”

Moved?  Lizzie’s brows knit in consternation as she slung her rucksack onto the floor and copied the new address and phone number onto the pad on her nightstand.  

She dialed up the number immediately and waited while the line rang.  Mum had never so much as mentioned a moved to her in the past, not that she’d noticed any how.


“Mum?”  Lizzie leaned up against her headboard and drew her knees up to her chest.  “I just got your message.”

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The Day I Met Damon Salvatore

Original Imagine: Imagine knowing all about Damon, then meeting him for the first time, and wanting nothing more than for him to fuck you.

Author: Jill

Reader Gender: Female

Word Count:  3,195

Warnings: Smut, dirty language, sex, climax, biting, blood

            “Today’s the day I will finally have him,” I whispered to myself. I couldn’t believe I was finally here, after all these years of anticipation. I drove up to the large mansion in awe. It was even more spectacular than I had seen in pictures. The façade reminded me of cottage, but its sprawling structure continued to the right and left by at least an acre each. Its red brick walls seemed to blend into the background of the turning fall leaves. I continued up the driveway, around the circular path that led me directly in front of the entrance. I parked and stood there for a moment, taking in all that I had seen. I needed a minute to compose myself. I knew they could sense my every emotion, so I had to stay calm, cool and collected. I took a few deep breaths until my nerves and excitement fell away like the drifting leaves that scattered the ground.

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Fine art and debauchery | one shot

Pairing: Jean-François Mercier x Betty

Rating: Adult

Word count: 4300 (what?)

Summary: Betty’s first time in Paris with Jean-François isn’t as idyllic as forethought. He takes her to the Louvre, and they find a rather unorthodox way of relaxing and appreciating art (by which I mean sex, of course). 

Warning: shameless romanticization of Paris and gratuitous French.

A/N: Part of the Perversions Délicates ‘verse, but can be read on its own I think.

Thanks to @fadewithfury for reading this while I was struggling with it.


During the Second World War, many of the Louvre’s masterpieces were evacuated. Venus and Ramses II were carefully wrapped up and carried to châteaux in the countryside. By the time the Nazis invaded, the great museum was practically empty. Sure, the Germans reopened it, but it was but an empty shell. Vegetables were grown in ornamental gardens and 16th century buildings were damaged by bombs.

It had taken two years and major renovations, but the museum had reopened at last with all its masterpieces in their rightful place. It’s not the Mona Lisa, however, that was on Betty’s mind right now, but something far more trivial: what does one wear at the Louvre? She imagined the museum to be filled with posh or cool artsy people. She belonged to neither category.

Betty inspected her outfit in front of the bedroom mirror. She’d remodeled a mint green dress— shortened the skirt, removed the sleeves and added a white collar— based on what Parisian women wore, but she still hesitated to wear it.

“You could have bought a new one,” Jean-François said.

“Don’t you like it?”

Truth was, she never wanted to be accused of loving him for his money.

“I like this.” He pecked the exposed freckle on her shoulder then finished buttoning up his pinstripe shirt.

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Live Blog - The White Princess Episode 2

Here’s my live blog of TWP Episode 2, it’s just over four pages.  I’ve given it a once-over rough edit, but this is what I wrote up while watching the episode.  Hope you find some humor here!

“drawn from the novel by Philippa gregory” righhhhht.

Wait, why is she smiling like that when she’s entering his apartments?  I can see a fake or strained smile, but she looks shy and happy?  Wtf?  Last I left them she was like “i don’t like this guy”, unless this is supposed to be her tricking him?

What is the hell is this scene?? She’s like… being seductive??  Also, neither of their costumes are working.  Her sleeves are ridiculous.  And he looks like he’s wearing an emo bathrobe.  Jacob is too good for this show.

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How ER‘s Alex Kingston, a serious British stage actress, found happiness, an outdoor barbecue and an orange 1960 Cadillac Eldorado in Los Angeles

by Steve Pond.   [InStyle, November 1998. Vol. 5, Issue 12, p. 362.]

At first, she hated Los Angeles. Alex Kingston took off for the city in July 1997, leaving behind a healthy stage and television career in London and a faltering marriage to actor Ralph Fiennes. Waiting for her in California were a handful of friends, a role on the hit NBC series ER, and a lot of uncertainty. On top of that, the 35-year-old British actress came face-to-face with what she refers to as “blazing Los Angeles,” and for a while that blaze – made up of everything from nondescript modern architecture to confounding voice-mail systems – got the best of her.

She has clearly recovered from her culture shock. “I took it way too seriously,” she says. “When you drive down Sunset Boulevard and see an enormous picture of [billboard queen] Angelyne with her breasts all over some Corvette, you have to laugh. One just has to start seeing it through different eyes." Kingston sits in the living room of her small, secluded home in the Hollywood Hills and shakes her head. She’s clad in an earth-tone peasant skirt and halter top, with silver rings around her fingers, more around her toes, and one through her pierced navel. Pulled back and pinned out of the way, her curly hair still seems wild, unruly – even a little bit American.

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The White Princess Episode 1 Live Blog

You asked and I have delivered.  My live blog of the first episode of TWP is below the cut.  It’s four and a half pages of stream of consciousness notes I took while rewatching the episode.  I don’t go into historical accuracy, that’s just not really an aim of the show so I don’t think it’s fair to critique that aspect.  But I do think I touch on 15th C. social mores a little.  Hope you enjoy.

The opening credits are really cool.  They remind me a lot of the credits for TWQ.  The graphics are pretty awesome.  Love the Tudor Rose imposed at the end.  

I guess this first scene was used to establish a tie between the last series and this one.  I’m just glad it was brief while also giving an idea of what we are working with.  However, I think this scene wouldn’t make much sense if you hadn’t seen TWQ.

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Elizabethan inspired Captain Swan historical AU, loosely based on the Tudor Queen and her relationships with her favourites like Robert Dudley and Sir Walter Raleigh.

Rating: M

One shot? Not sure, I could write some more of this or just leave it as is. We’ll see.


The scandal had rocked the whole of Europe. King David of England had fallen violently in love with Mary Blanchard, an ambitious knight’s daughter who refused to become a mere royal mistress, enjoyed for a time and then married off to a minor nobleman when the king’s interest inevitably waned. Unused to being denied by a woman he desired, the king swore that he would give Mary what she wanted and make her his queen.

But David already had a wife - Kathryn, the onetime fiance of his deceased brother James. For six long years he petitioned the Pope in vain for a divorce, while Kathryn wept and Mary presided over court as consort in all but name while still refusing to share the king’s bed. When she succumbed at last and quickly conceived a child, David broke with Rome and created a new church in his own image to bless his new marriage and his new heir. The much longed for son would ensure the continuation of his dynasty and keep the English throne from falling into foreign hands.

The queen was delivered of a daughter instead, and Mary’s triumph turned to defeat as David’s passion twisted into poison. Her fall from grace was swift and deadly, and as a headless body was buried in an arrow chest beneath the Tower a three year old girl was left behind, stripped of title and relegated to the status of the king’s bastard instead of his heir. Though she had been named for a Saxon queen of old, it seemed that she would never rise to wear the crown.

Fate had other plans.

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